Disclaimer: I don't own V:tMB and I kinda own my main character, the part I don't own is the fact that she's Tremere. Her clan, plus all the identifiable V:tMB characters are owned by White Wolf Inc. The rest of my main character I do, in fact, own. Please be kind, this is my first V:tMB fic.

11. Chapter Eleven

For several nights afterward, I heard nothing from LaCroix about Heather. As much as I would have liked to believe that he had nothing to say about her, I doubted it. A feeling was percolating in my gut, never letting me forget that Sebastian had found out about my Ghoul, and I didn't know if it would be okay by him if I kept her around.

I hoped it would, because I needed her.

Heather was kept in the dark about why it was such a big deal. I didn't want her to worry or feel bad about being in the living room when LaCroix dropped me off. If I told her, she would only blame herself and cry. If he would make me do something about her, I didn't want her to be miserable during a time when she should be happy.

I tried to spend as many nights at home with her as I could after that. The last thing I wanted was to distance myself from her, no matter how much easier it would be on me when (or if) Sebastian decided that I couldn't keep her around. It might have been easier on the both of us if I'd done my best to stay away from her, but I didn't. Was I selfish? I didn't think so.

But then the e-mail came.

(Subject :) Your Ghoul

(From :) LaCroix

It has come to my attention that you've been keeping a ghoul at your apartment, and I would like to discuss terms of agreement relating to the ghoul in question. I would like to assure you that I am not pleased by this, and I do not wish for you to loiter about to draw the matter out. If you do so, I will send Sheriff to deal with her in my own way. –SL

My mind echoed with constant questions, what sort of terms did he mean to discuss? Would he make me kill her myself? And more importantly, what would happen to Heather? The question that bothered me most was what would happen to Heather after all of this was said and done. I would, if I had to, secure her a safe place to live out the rest of her life in peace.

I didn't entirely know why I did it, but I got dressed in my work clothes. I didn't have a job to do, I was just going to Ventrue Tower to talk about Heather and the 'terms of agreement' as Sebastian called it. It was an impulsive thing, and I didn't know I was doing it until it was done. Before I knew it, my boots were on and I was throwing my trench coat over my bodysuit. I was scared for Heather, and I had hoped I would never feel that way again after the Vandal incident.

The whole walk over to Ventrue Tower was nerve racking. Each step made my feet feel like lead bricks, weighing me down and making it harder to do what LaCroix had told me. I knew some dark fate awaited me at the tower, but if I turned away and ran, a worse fate would come, and I wouldn't be able to stop it.

Chunk buzzed me up to the penthouse, and it wasn't until I was in the elevator that I started to feel sick. Not as though I needed to go to the hospital (vampires can't get ill) but sick as in my gut was telling me something bad was going to happen. All I could do was try and plead Heather's case, hopeful that maybe LaCroix would let her stay around.

But when I saw him sitting at his desk, with my ominous best friend next to it, I felt all hope slowly die. I swallowed and stood before his desk, ready to do whatever it took to keep Heather as my friend. Or alive at least.

"I'm here," I stated.

"I can see that," He didn't sound happy to see me, but he never sounded as if he was, so there was no change there. "I wish to discuss with you the…ghoul you've been keeping."

"Listen, I know you're mad about Heather but she hasn't done anything to violate the masquerade! She's kept my secret for as long as we've been friends and—" He held up his hand to silence me.

"Let me finish," I snapped my mouth shut, and let him continue; "Do you not recall the ghoul you had to eliminate? Patty?" I nodded, I remembered her, but barely. She was no more important to me than a fly is to the flyswatter.

"But Heather isn't like Patty!" Which was true, "She's not obnoxiously loud or a big mouth! She's kept my secret for two years an—"

"Two years?" He growled, I shrunk back. I had forgotten that he didn't know Heather had been my ghoul for two years, I could only hope that would help later on in the deal-making. But, as it seemed, it would be the very thing that signed her death warrant. "You've been keeping this ghoul for two years?"

"That's right, but doesn't it count for something? I mean, if two years went by and you didn't even know about her, doesn't that make you think she's trustworthy?" I hoped to the god that damned me that it did. I wanted so much for him to look deep inside and find it in his black little heart to let me keep my friend.

But I was neglecting to remember that it was Sebastian LaCroix I was talking to.

"And what happens when it can't get its blood? Hmm?" He asked; I could hear the controlled anger in him. His eyes were narrowed, and filled with the dislike that I wasn't just doing what he said and not questioning it. "It will end up betraying our secret and we'll have to put it down anyway. I will be spared the trouble if I just eliminate it now." I didn't like how he was calling Heather an 'it' like she was an animal or a t-shirt.

"She won't," I put emphasis on 'she', "She would never do that to me."

"Isn't that what you thought before Maximilian left you here?" That was cold. I never thought of LaCroix as cruel, but right then it felt like getting hit below the belt. I didn't show how much that hurt me, I couldn't give him the pleasure.

"But Heather means it," I was my rebuttal; "She's a good friend to me and has kept my secret for two years. You might not believe me, but it's true. She hasn't told anyone yet, and she would rather die than tell." It wasn't as strong as I'd expected, but I did hope it was enough to persuade him. "I know her better than anyone else, and I know she wouldn't do that."

I could see he wasn't being persuaded. Jesus…it was like trying to convince a pack of lions not to eat the wounded gazelle. As hard as it was, it had to be done. I didn't know how, and I could feel the steel of uselessness coming down on me like the blade of Sheriff's sword on the neck of an offender.

"I saved her life," I started up again, "And she vowed to guard mine." He raised his eyebrow; I could only hope that he got the connection between what I did for Heather and what he did for me. If he did, it might be the thing that would save Heather's life from Sheriff's sword. He would have to be the one to kill her if it came to that, because I would be the one defending her.

For the longest time, he had a look of indecision on his face. I couldn't believe that he was actually considering another option! I was so dumbfounded by it that I couldn't move. I just stood there, paralyzed, and waiting for his response.

"I will make a deal with you," He said, my hopes rose again, was he seeing my side of it? Oh god I hoped so. "Because you are my most indispensable agent, I will allow your ghoul to live." My hopes skyrocketed; I was half a second away from jumping over the table and tackling him in his chair with a big hug out of total joy. But then he continued, "The only thing I ask from you is you never see nor speak to it again."

The world seemed to stop spinning. I had bargained for Heather's life, but in doing so, I had cost us our friendship. I had hoped to keep both intact, but LaCroix seemed to have other ideas in mind.

"What?" I breathed, "There's no other deal we can make?"

"I'm afraid not," He said, the strength in his voice was showing through. "It's either that, or I have Sheriff go and behead it right now." I hated the options I was given. I had to choose between having her dead, and having her dead to me. No matter which one I chose, Heather would be out of my life forever. "What is your decision?"

"…I'll tell her to go…" It was better than getting her killed. I was selfish, but I wasn't so selfish that I would surrender her life.

He must have heard the weight of the sadness in my voice, because he added,

"I can be a bit cruel at times, but you must remember, the responsibility of this city's kindred rests on my shoulders." He said, "So I cannot always be a tolerant man."

"Whatever," My voice cracked, I had to get out. I turned and left without being dismissed, scurrying down to the lobby like a frightened rabbit. My vision was so blurred by my tears I that could have run into a wall or two if I didn't know any better. I was alone in the elevator, I could have cried there, but a camera was spying on me from one of the corners.

I tapped my foot to help occupy my mind until I could find a quiet, private place to cry. I didn't know who monitored the security cameras, but it didn't matter, I didn't want them to see me crying. It was against my policy to do otherwise, it made me stronger.

The elevator doors couldn't open quickly enough. Were they, too, mocking me? I was on the edge, I almost gave up my policy and crumpled over crying right there. My vision was completely gone behind the water, and I had to roll my lips in between my teeth to control myself. I had hoped to maybe make it to a dark ally or something, but it didn't seem like that was going to happen to me.

"Chunk?" I had to take a deep breath and hold it for a minute or two before saying his name; I couldn't hint that I was hurting at all, "Where's the lady's room on this floor?"

"Oh, um, down the hall and to the right there." I nodded and ran off with him calling onto my back, "You okay Miss. Young?"

I burst through the bathroom door, and immediately lost it. I crumpled over on my knees and sobbed, surprised to find that it still hurt to lose someone, even as a vampire. I had hoped that I'd numbed my emotions down enough so that I wouldn't feel the gaping hole when I had to say goodbye to someone. I was wrong.

Truthfully, I forgot how it felt to cry that hard. To feel my gut twisting and threaten to make me throw up. I cried so hard that I started to gag and even coughed a few times. My fingers retracted and clenched against my palm, and I felt the trickles of tears drop off my jaw and land onto the back of the hand I had on my knees.

But as my crying slowed, I was slowly able to think more reasonably. I was doing Heather a favor, I told myself, if I didn't make her dead to me Sebastian would make her dead. Period. It was a far better thing for her to live without me than to not live at all. So, with that in mind, I got up and went to my apartment to do what I knew was right.

Here's another one I cut in half! Woo?

Edited by the awesome Lady Rain!