Chapter V:

Kim

Kim was beginning to think Ron was hiding something from her. "Beginning" being a loose term. Sure there were things that Ron was "hiding" from her but wasn't actually trying hard enough because Kim already knew and just didn't tell him that she did to preserve hid dignity a little longer, but this was different. Maybe it was that she was still coming to terms with the fact that there were things his ninja school didn't like sharing with outsiders.

Even so, Kim had always kind of felt like she was an exception to that rule after the gorilla incident when she'd found out about them in the first place. But if it wasn't something Kim already knew, what was Ron scratching his nose in distracted silence for? Seriously, if he kept this up he was going to get a zit or something. More like a dozen zits.

But Kim would get it out of him today. At some point. Somehow.

The day started in the hotel room, in which sleeping in was mandatory. With nothing specific to do until Jake got out of school, and nothing like homework or classes to get them up sooner, lunch time had become breakfast time. Both of them were quick to recover from jet lag, and Kim pretended not to notice when Ron would wake up naturally around 5 in the morning. He would roll out of bed, stretch for a bit, and then roll right back into bed and be totally dead to the world in less than fifteen minutes. Kim had no doubt that the morning routine was a habit from living at the dojo, but spending another six hours cuddled up next to Kim in their tiny, single-bed, hotel room was a want stronger than habit.

Kim rolled out of bed herself around ten o'clock,

stepped out of her shower around ten fifteen, and Ron finished blow drying her hair by ten thirty. By the time Ron stepped out of the shower at eleven, Kim had their day bags packed, the map of the city marked for everywhere they might need to go that day, including where they would meet Jake when he was out of school, and a casual outfit for Ron that didn't look like it had been put together by his sister. Rufus rolled out of Ron's pillow around eleven fifteen.

Ron had been trying to make some sort of anti-homework excuse since Sunday, and he'd so far succeeded in convincing Kim to spend all of Monday shopping - which meant new sweaters, hallelujah - and the spent most of the night after getting themselves hopelessly lost on the streets after sun-down. Kim, to her own embarrassment, had claimed early on that the buildings didn't look that similar and there was no way they would really need to use the GPS to find their way back to the hotel.

They passed through Time Square four times from three different directions, and used the GPS around midnight.

Today, on the other hand, was homework day. At least until Kim had to go meet Jake to check out the whole ghost lead thing. Ron would not be accompanying that trip, in interest of prolonging his un-dead denial as long as humanly possible.

Too bad the number of humans they'd met on this trip was exactly two.

The weather outside was beautiful. Sunny and warm enough to not need a hat or a scarf but just chilly enough to warrant a cozy jacket. Of course it was less about how Kim felt in a sweater and more about how good Ron looked in his new sweater.

When they found a comfortable patch of grass in Central Park, study hour started. About forty-five minutes into that hour saw Kim halfway through her statistics problems and Ron laying across the ground in front of her with a Japanese copy of a Naruto volume on his chest.

Kim was having trouble focusing. It wasn't just the Ron thing distracting her either. She thought she had taken the whole magic thing pretty well, considering. It helped that she and Ron had a history with strange things and maybe a secret community of magical creatures wasn't that far of a jump. It was still incredibly distracting to think about though. It was taking up most of her focus. Maybe she was having some sort of delayed reaction to it all.

She found herself asking out loud, "How do they talk with those mouths?"

Ron didn't open his eyes, but he lifted a hand to lift a knowledgeable finger and said, "When it comes to magic superpowers, Kim, you learn not to question these things."

He would know, considering he could make himself glow blue.

"Gift horse in the mouth kind of thing?" Kim said.

He shrugged. "More like gift intelligent lizards, but I guess it depends on who's asking."

"Who is asking?"

Ron looked up at her. "What?"

This was it. She'd started the conversation, no backing out now. "Ron are you keeping something from me?"

Ron flinched so hard he about flipped over. His manga and Rufus both fell off his chest. "What? No! I know- I would ne-" He was sitting up now, arms going that nervous twitchy thing he started doing after someone had told him what all his tells are. By attempting to avoid doing them he only made them more obvious. Kim thought it was adorable.

She couldn't let that distract her though. "Ron."

His arms slumped to his sides. "Maybe."

He almost didn't look like he was going to keep talking, but Kim crossed her arms and stayed silent. That method usually worked.

"I think..."

Bingo.

"I'm pretty sure I've met a dragon before?"

Kim uncrossed her arms to lean forward on them. "What? When?"

Had he seen the dragons a year ago, when they'd tracked that one to Japan? Kim could have sworn he hadn't seen anything when he'd shown up with Yori in the last minute. But why wouldn't he have brought that up sooner?

He said, "Well there's a guy that comes by the dojo a lot and... man I don't think I should be... I told him I wou-"

"Ron."

"Alright! Okay!" Ron threw his arms out and threw himself back to the ground, his head next to her crossed legs. "You're persuasion tactics are too powerful!" Kim gave his forehead a quick kiss. Ron took a deep breath and continued, "There's this guy who comes by the dojo sometimes. I guess we're kinda friends? He takes a lot of interest in me, but I figured it was just because of the monkey powers thing." His fingers started tapping then and he looked up at the clouds as he talked. "But then one time I noticed that he had no way of getting up and down the mountain. I mean, yeah, we walk up and down it all the time but I'd never even seen him walking on the path even though there were a few time that I definitely should have seen him. I mean, there's only one path way up and down so when I would go to the bottom and then right back up and then have him not be there when I left and be there when I get back is kinda sketch, right?"

"Yeah, kinda sketch."

"Right? So anyway I did some investigating. One time, after we said goodbye, I followed him a little ways down the mountain. He walked for a while but then he stopped and then. There was this flash and..." Ron spun his hands around each other as he fought his words. "He flew away? I don't know, Kim, I freaked out! I thought I was losing it and I-uh, I might have passed out."

"So when you said you think you've met a dragon before...?"

"I have totally met a dragon before."

Rufus gave affirmative squeaks.

"Yeah. Yeah, I've totally met a dragon before." Ron slapped his hands over his eyes and dragged then down his face.

"Well Jake mentioned something about being the American Dragon."

"Yeah, Haley mentioned that, too. Y'know out of all creatures to mythologically exist, I never would have pictured dragons to be the political ones. Maybe it's a culture thing? Like my image of a dragon is hoarding gold and eating hobbits or something but then maybe dragons in other parts of the world-"

"Exactly," Kim interrupted.

"Exactly what?"

"If Jake's the American Dragon, maybe there's a Japanese Dragon."

Ron sat up again. He looked hopeful. "You think?"

"It makes sense. Maybe that's the guy you met?"

Ron stared at his toes for a few moments. Kim rarely saw him this pensive about anything. How long had Ron known this other dragon guy for? Were they close? Had Kim ever met him?

Ron eventually said, "Do you think we could ask Jake?"

"I think it's worth a shot. How about I ask him today while you stay behind in the hotel and watch Ghost Busters?"

Ron shoved his fingers in his ears and started shouting, "LALALALA WHAT? WHAT WAS THAT? I'M SORRY I COULDN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF GHOSTS NOT EXISTING!"

Rufus, who had startled at the noise, bit at Ron's shoulder.

Ron yelped. "Ow!"

While Kim was laughing, her wrist started beeping.

Ron paused in his hand-to-rodent wrestling match with Rufus to ask, "Who's calling?"

"Let's find out." Kim tapped the answer call button and a video chat line opened. "Oh, hey Wade."

"Hi Wade!" Ron said.

"Hey Kim, hey Ron! So I looked into Shego some more and it looks like the run-in you had with her on Thursday wasn't the first time she was in town."

"It wasn't?" Kim said. "Wouldn't we have heard about that?"

"That's what I thought, too. Being an international criminal and all." Wade tapped a few buttons and Kim's view screen split into another feed. "But from the footage I…apprehended, and the few witness statements the police got before the investigation was mysteriously shut down, it was definitely Shego."

The screen was small and video grainy, but Kim could still make out the scene of a bar/restaurant and the long black hair on the figure placing her hands on the bar counter and burning through it. She moved somewhere off camera after that, and Wade switched the feed off.

"It took place at a bar near downtown called 'Fish Tales'. The place seems pretty average, from my perspective. Granted, my perspective was built entirely on Netflix dramas. Anyway, according to the abysmal report, nothing was stolen. She just came in, destroyed some stuff, and then left."

"I'd recognize that shade of green anywhere, it was definitely Shego." Kim agreed. "Do you think Jake knows?"

Ron said, "We could find out."

"Thanks Wade," Kim said, "call you back soon."

Wade waved a hand goodbye and the call switched off. Kim started tapping the screen on her Kimmunicator, looking for Jake in her contacts.

"Wouldn't he still be at school?" Ron asked.

As it started ringing, Kim said, "I figure I can leave a-"

"Hello?"

Kim startled when the new video line opened. "Jake! You're not busy? I was going to leave a message."

"Oh I'm in Basic Languages right now, I've got time."

"Basic Languages?"

Jake shrugged. "Yeah, our school wanted to look better by adding more foreign language options but all they could do was make a blow off class for kids who want to count in ten different languages." Jake looked up at some sort of commotion on his side. The camera shook around and showed the ceiling for a moment and Kim could hear Jake yelling something and then he was back. "Anyway, what's up?"

Kim decided not to question it. "Well, about that place you wanted to show me tonight, before we go there, there's somewhere else I think we should check out."

"Really?"

"Wade called me back. He says he thinks Shego might have been in town before we saw her on Thursday."

Jake frowned and glared at something just past the camera. "That's the first I've heard of that."

"He told me about this robbery that went down at a bar last week that he thinks might have been Shego's work."

"A bar? Was it called Fish Tales?"

"Uh, yeah. How'd you know?"

"It's got a regular front, but the back's a club run by wizards. I think Fu mentioned it got broken into last week. They have a mermaid tank in the bar." Seeing the look on Kim's face he added, "She gets paid! And it's not like she's in there all the time. You ready to go now? I can show you."

"Are you saying you're going to skip school?"

"Maybe." At the look on Kim's face he said, "What? You're the one who encouraged me to fight the man, or whatever."

Kim's face flushed a little. "I didn't want you to not do something you felt was right just because someone older than you said so."

Ron smirked and said, "That sounds a lot like fight the man, Kim."

"It was supposed to be trust your gut!" She turned back to Jake. "Trust your gut, not fight the man!"

"Okay, I'll stay at school!" Jake huffed. "Spud's gonna meet you over there, though."

"Spud's skipping school?"

"Today's the day all the AP classes have tests, and most of Spud's schedule is AP, so he just skips."

"All in one day?"

"It's not the best high school."

"But if he has all these tests today, why is he skipping?"

Just then Spud pushed his face next to Jake's so he could be seen by the camera. "I have learned to prioritize life over education!"

Jake pushed a few inches between his face and Spud's and turned the camera to include him. "What he said."

Kim put a hand on her hip. "So what about Trixie?"

Spud answered, "What? No, Trixie wants to be a doctor, for her prioritizing school is prioritizing life. Jake and I, on the other hand," he slung an arm around Jake's shoulders, "are reaching for goals in life that the conventional American education system simply cannot give us."

Ron leaned over Kim's wrist so he could see. Jake and Spud would be seeing him upside down. "Well Jake is a dragon," Ron said, "but what goal are you looking for, Spud?"

"His goal is searching for a goal," Jake said.

"Exactly," Spud agreed. "And if there's anything Jake taught me, it's that there's more to the world than they teach you in public school. For example, did you know Brownies don't actually like brownies? Like, the food kind? I learned that from personal experience."

Seeing Ron's face, Jake said, "Don't ask."

"Anyway, you'll need Spud to get in the back. The bouncer recognizes him."

"Seriously?"

"Seriously."

Spud saluted them when they met him outside of the building. "Ms. Possible," he greeted.

Kim cringed a little at the fan-boy welcome. Her first meeting with Spud had been brief, but he'd spent half of it shaking her hand and the other half asking her which rumors were true and which of her nemesis she felt would be most likely to make a comeback in the next three years. Trixie had dragged him away before he could pull out any kind of autograph book, at least.

He'd also asked a lot of questions about "The Middleton Conspiracy".

Ron saluted back, but Kim settled for greeting him politely. "Seriously, just 'Kim' is fine, Spud."

"So why is it that we need you to get in?" Ron.

"Well technically it's a wizards' bar, but all you really need to get in is a pair of these," Spud said and he pulled out a pair of sticks with oddly decorated spiders on top.

"Didn't you tell me you took those off another wizard guy?" Ron asked.

"Yeah, but Pandarus would change motifs every season. Wherever he is, he's probably circled back around to owls or something." Spud pulled open the door to the building. He bowed and waved his hand like a butler. "After you."

Kim stepped through the door, Ron followed behind her, telling Spud, "Why thank you, sir," and Spud followed Ron and shut the door behind them.

The front part of the secret wizard bar, was a regular bar. A dim, scratched-up, bar that smelled like failure and alcoholism. Kim had gathered about as much from the video Wade had shown her, but it still felt really anti-climactic somehow. It was in pretty good shape for having been violently attacked less than a week ago, though. Looking around, Kim recognized the section of the bar that Shego had destroyed in the security video but it looked untouched.

Ron echoed her thoughts, saying, "This place looks pretty tidy for having been robbed less than a week ago."

Spud flipped the wand in his hand again. "Wizard bar. "

Since it was a bar and it was the middle of the afternoon, the place was pretty empty, save for some employees cleaning tables and one or two slouching men in suits at the bar. At the back of the room, in front of big oak door with a sign that read "Private Party," was a very large man in a black suit that definitely did not come from an average security agency.

The guy grunted unhappily as they crossed the restaurant floor. "Spudinski," he growled.

Spud approached him with his chest out and a wand twirling between his fingers. "Afternoon, Francie." He gestured to Kim and Ron. "Just showing my friends around my regular chill spots. Mind letting us through?"

Francie suddenly leaned into Kim's face. She flinched but she didn't move as she stared him down. She stared back. In a flash he'd moved to do the same to Ron, who'd flinched so hard he jumped and was looking anywhere but Francie's face. Then Francie…sniffed him. Ron tried to give a friendly smile and a wave but failed miserably.

Francie stood back up and addressed Spud. "She can go. He stays outside."

Ron threw his arms up. "What! I don't smell that bad do I?" He sniffed under one of his arms. "Ha! See? Kim washed this sweater last night!" He all but shoved his armpit in Spud's face. "Sniff!"

Kim slapped a hand to her face.

Spud sniffed his armpit. "Mmm, cherry blossom!"

Francie remained unfazed. "He stays outside."

Kim sighed. "Alright. Ron, can you wait for us here-actually," Kim gave Francie a suspicious look, "wait on the sidewalk."

"But-!"

"Please, Ron," Kim asked. "I don't want to make a scene."

Ron huffed and put his hands in his pockets. "Oh, okay. But you'd better take a picture or something."

The door creaked as Francie pushed it open. Where Kim had expected a hallway or another room, there was only black in the doorway. Kim lifted an eyebrow, but Spud took the whole thing in stride, said, "Thanks a bunch," to Francis and stepped right through it, disappearing on the other side.

Kim gulped down her anxiety of stepping into a black nothing and stepped forward.

On the other side of the magic black curtain - but Kim could freak out about that more later - was more like what Kim had expected and at the same time not at all like Kim had expected. Clearly Harry Potter had given her the wrong idea.

It looked less like Hogsmead and more like the roaring 20s. It looked expensive. The room was illuminated like early twilight. The layout was wide and velvet-seated booths lined the walls. The tables were all topped by some sort of pearly crystal that Kim had never seen before. The bartender wore a three piece with a bow-tie and the few customers present wore ties and velvet cloaks.

"So, wizards are all… loaded?" Kim said.

Spud shrugged. "The ones in New York City are, at least. It's usually a bloodline thing, I think."

Kim could only shake her head.

Then she noticed the bar. There was an actual mermaid in the bar. The bar itself was a huge fish tank lined with barstools and with a thick top for patrons to place their glasses on. Inside the tank was a woman with flowing red hair, bluish skin, and a seven foot fish tail. In the half light of the room, the spots along her scales glowed, the light reflecting in all directions as it bounced off of the tank walls. Spud strode to one end of the bar and knocked against the glass. The mermaid turned at the sound. Spud waved when she spotted him, and she lazily swam up to him. Kim approached as she pulled her head out of the water and lounged herself over the edge of the hole in the end of the bar.

"Good afternoon, my fair lady," Spud greeted, bowing dramatically. "Turner of heads across the seven seas."

The mermaid didn't bother to acknowledge he had said anything. "Hey, tall, lank, and single," she greeted. "What are you doing in here?" She noticed Kim, then, and looked her up and down. "Nice hair."

Kim tucked a stray lock behind her ear. "Uh, thanks."

"Cassie, this is Kim Possible, Kim, Cassandra," Spud introduced. "Jake asked me to ask you if they're treating you okay."

"Honey, I'm get paid five hundred a night, they're treating me fine," she insisted, smiling and tucking her hair behind her ear. Her hair wasn't even really wet; the water just rolled off of the locks.

Kim had trouble seeing being stuck in a five foot high tank for hours on end as okay, but Cass had herself draped over the edge of the tank like she owned it and her tail swept across gold coins on the tank bed. "Of course they are."

Cassandra shot Kim a judging look and flipped a particularly large pile of coins over with her tail. "What can I do ya for?" she asked.

"We heard there'd been a robbery here last week," Kim said. "Is there anything you could tell us about it?"

"Darlin', I was there," she said. "Ask me anything."

"Did you see the woman who broke in here?"

"Psh," Cassandra scoffed, and re-tucked her hair. "Course I did, she bought a drink."

Kim and Spud exchanged a surprised look. Kim said, "Wait, seriously? I thought it was a robbery?"

"It was, she was a terrible tipper. Not that she didn't use force to get back here. Usually the only password to get in is a functional set of twigs or a set of scales. This lady though," Cassandra whistled out of thin gills that opened across her neckline.

"So…Shego's a witch?" Kim said.

Cassandra scoffed. "Hardly. But she could really pack a punch. Threw Francie right through the wall. She made a big mess of the store front, but once she got back here, a guy offered her a drink, they chatted it up for a while, then she left with a bottle o' wine."

"Did you happen to see who she was talking to?"

"Sure, but he was wearin' a hood. And even with the part if his face I did see, you land people all look the same to me. But I could tell he was an aged kind of handsome. The Wicked Witch must o' been blind to it though. I've never witnessed such an utter lack of sexual tension in my life."

"I though you said she wasn't a witch?" Spud asked skeptically.

"It's a metaphor, Sweetheart."

"Wha-oooh. Green skin, I get it, continue."

Kim huffed. She wasn't sure she liked the way Cassandra treated Spud. She also wasn't sure she wasn't jealous of the heaps of gold she flipped around her flippers. She tried to keep her voice professional as she asked, "Is there anything else you can tell us?"

Cassandra thought for a moment but she shook her head. "Naw, that's about it. Sorry I couldn't be of more help."

Kim shook her head. "No, you've been plenty helpful! Thank you for your time." Then Kim remembered, "Actually…I don't have any gold coins, but can you do me a favor?"

Ron was pouting on the street when they stepped back outside. He was leaning against the building, his lower lip out, and tapping at buttons on his Kimmunicator while Rufus squeaked something or other on his shoulder. When Ron saw Kim he smiled. "How'd it go?"

Kim shrugged. "Not quite as expected."

"Meaning…?"

"Meaning she did a number on the store front, but all she walked out with was a bottle of wine and a future drinking buddy."

Ron hummed and stroked his imaginary facial hair. "So she is working with somebody."

"It's probably safe to say that we can't rule it out."

"What about the wine bottle?"

"What if she's working on a spell or something," Spud suggested. "She may not be a witch or anything, but magic booze sounds like something I'd try to summon monsters with."

"So she violently broke into a bar full of wizards on a grocery run?" Ron asked.

Kim put a thoughtful finger to her lips. "Maybe it is a grocery run."

Rufus made a curious squeak.

"Remember I had Jake look over all the places Shego had been seen before now? He said he couldn't figure out a connection between the places, but he did say that each one was related to the magical world somehow. Is it possible she's been going around all this time collecting things?"

Ron's eyes widened. "When I saw her at the convention, it looked like she pocketed something! Maybe she was grabbing something off of the pixies, too."

Spud suggested, "Pixie dust?"

"If she is collecting ingredients for something, this may be the closest thing we've had to a lead all year," Kim said. It was exciting finally have something. The last year had been suffering from a frustrating lack of action. "If we can figure out what…spell, or whatever that she's collecting things for, maybe we can figure out where she'll go next."

"Can we get food first?" Ron asked. "Rufus has a very small and very empty stomach." His stomach growled - more like roared - loud enough to hear. "Alright, I'm hungry, too."

"Bueno Nacho?"

"Muy Bueno!" Ron cheered.

Rufus squeaked something that may also have been "Muy Bueno!"

Spud's phone vibrated loudly then, and he pulled it out of his pocket. "As much as I'd love to come - believe me, I would - I'm apparently late for a post-test study date with Trixie. But! I can stop by the shop later and ask Fu about spells that might involve magic liquor and pixie dust. I'd say we could meet there later or something, but given that the shop owners return date is totally up in the air and said shop owner isn't exactly your biggest fan…"

"That would be fantastic, Spud," Kim said. "Thanks."

Spud checked his phone again and started backing down the sidewalk as he spoke. "Not a problem. Although, if you wouldn't mind doing me a favor and signing my-"

"Maybe later."

As Spud turned and jogged off he called over his shoulder, "I'm taking that as a yes!"

Ron nudged Kim's arm. "So, what was it like in there? Were their wizards? Warlocks? Mages? Ogres? Hobbi-"

"Actually…" Kim selected the photo folder on her Kimmunicator and flipped to her newest selfie. "I've got a picture for you."

(This update was a mess, you guys are troopers.

Edited 10/25/15)

-Kinetic