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Lyrics are in italics songs are:
'Kiss Me' by Sixpence None the Richer
'Courage Is' by The Strange Familiar
Chapter 12
"Kiss me…" Kurt sang happily as he moved about the dorm room getting ready, a bleary eyed and tousle haired Jake just beginning to stir to life. "Out of the bearded barley, Nightly, beside the green, green grass, Swing, swing, swing the spinning step, You wear those shoes and I will wear that dress." He smiled to himself in the bathroom mirror as he combed his hair into his preferred style and covered it with organic hairspray to hold it in place. "Oh, kiss me beneath the milky twilight, Lead me out on the moonlit floor, Lift your open hand, Strike up the band and make the fireflies dance, Silver moon's sparkling, So kiss me."
He danced his way back into the bedroom to find a grumbling Jake struggling to fix his tie. Rolling his eyes, Kurt strode towards him and slapped his hands out of the way before sorting his tie out for him.
"There, perfect." Kurt commented as he admired his handiwork. "Kiss me down by the broken tree house."
"Aw Kurt, I never knew you felt that way." Jake said puckering up his lips.
"Oh yuck." Kurt replied as he was attacked by Jake's morning breath. "Please, go and clean your teeth."
"Yes mum." Jake answered sarcastically making his way to the bathroom.
Pulling on his blazer, Kurt walked to the door and pulled it open to find Blaine leaning casually against the wall. He smiled at him, slightly surprised to see him there but he wasn't about to complain. It was on the tip of his tongue to say 'good morning' but Blaine placed a chaste kiss to his mouth and seemed to steal Kurt's vocabulary in the process.
"Walk with me?" Blaine asked offering his hand.
Before Kurt could take it, he was shoved to the side and Jake laced his fingers with the shorter boy's.
"Oh Mr. Anderson, I would love to." Jake gushed swinging their conjoined hands back and forth. "Sorry Kurtie, Blaine's moved on to bigger and better things." He winked as he pulled a smirk and Kurt merely let out a scoff of laughter in retaliation.
"Oh please, I am far superior to you Jakey-boy." Kurt told him arrogantly as he forcibly parted the other two's hands. "And my cock is at least two inches bigger than yours… probably three. Now if you'll excuse us." He took Blaine's hand and they made their way down the hall.
"Yeah well… your grandmother looks like Julie Andrews!" Jake called out to them.
"His insults really lack a certain sting in the mornings." Kurt commented. "By the way, not that I mind, but why the morning kiss and hand-holding?"
"I'm just taking what I can get before it's gone." Blaine answered squeezing Kurt's hand tighter as though afraid to let go. "If you're not busy tonight, I'd like you to come to my room so we can… talk."
"Nothing is going to make me run away from you, Blaine." Kurt told him. "How many times do I have to say that before you believe it?"
"After tonight, if you're still willing to even breathe the same air as me, then I'll believe you." Blaine responded.
"You know what conclusion I have recently come to?" Kurt asked with a crooked smile to show he was teasing. "You my gorgeous friend are simply being a drama queen. My diva ways intimidate you and you're trying to match it."
"Oh shut up." Blaine laughed shoving Kurt away before pulling him back, knowing that Kurt was only joking. "You really are beautiful you know, have I ever told you that?"
"Why thank you, Blaine." Kurt responded with a bashful smile. "See, you aren't completely terrible when it comes to romance."
"That wasn't romance." Blaine replied. "I was merely stating a fact. I'd love to kiss you again."
"I certainly won't object." Kurt told him and their mouths met eagerly before Kurt found himself pinned against the nearest wall. He let out a moan before reversing their positions so that he was pressing Blaine up against the wall, pinning the shorter boy's hands above his head.
"Get a room slut." A spiteful voice said and they pulled apart to see one of Daniel's friends walking by.
Blaine made a move to attack him but Kurt held him back, struggling a little as he realised Blaine was stronger than he looked.
"Easy, he's not worth it." Kurt said and he waited until Blaine had calmed down before guiding him the rest of the way to the breakfast hall. "Looks like they still aren't speaking." Kurt commented as he saw Wes and David sitting at different tables once again.
"Wes is stubborn, that's what the problem is." Blaine sighed. "Look, I'm gonna sit with David before he tries to drown himself in his cereal milk. You should try and talk some sense into Wes. I'll see you in class."
Kurt nodded and watched as Blaine whisked away towards David. Coffee and plate of toast in hand, Kurt took up the seat beside Wes. A quick glance to the other boy's face told him that he hadn't slept well the night before. Heavy circles had formed under his eyes and Kurt mentally thought of the products in his bathroom that could cover them.
"You didn't sleep." Kurt pointed out and Wes just shrugged as he poked at his pancakes but didn't eat them. Kurt frowned a little wondering why Wes would select pancakes, he was sure he'd never seen him eat them before. He then realised that pancakes were in fact David's favourite, thereby making Wes' breakfast choice a tell-telling sign that he missed his best friend. "Did you talk to David at all last night?" He dared to ask.
"Not as such." Wes answered running a hand through his hair. "Your charming roommate did lock us in a room together for a few hours though."
"Oh, sorry." Kurt replied awkwardly wondering why Jake hadn't mentioned such a thing. "I do try to keep Jake under control but it's no easy task."
"He just kept yelling at me." Wes said as he looked across the hall at David, seemingly unaware that Kurt had even spoken. "The whole time we were locked up together he just kept hurling abuse at me. He's usually so happy, a smile on his lips and laughter in his eyes, but not last night. He was so angry."
"Did you say anything to him?" Kurt asked.
"No." Wes shrugged lazily still prodding at his pancakes. "I just listened as he ranted at me. I didn't say a single word."
"Why not?" Kurt questioned.
"I was afraid of saying the wrong thing." Wes replied.
"Then maybe you shouldn't speak." Kurt suggested. "Perhaps you should sing. I could help you select and rehearse a song. I did it for my step-brother Finn once and he said it really helped him out. He was singing a song for the baby girl who wasn't his because his then girlfriend was in fact impregnated by his then best friend but she lied to Finn saying it was his even though they'd never actually had sex, she told him that being in the hot tub meant the sperm could swim faster, Finn isn't the most intellectual of beings unfortunately. I also helped him pick a song to sing to Quinn, she was the mother of the baby that wasn't really Finn's, and her parents who didn't know she was pregnant at the time. Although, that plan kind of sucked because her dad threw her out the house."
Wes just blinked at him a few times in confusion before taking a small bite of his pancakes. As the syrup hit his tongue, a small moan slipped past his lips and Kurt was sure he saw a tear in Wes' eye.
"You miss him." Kurt said nodding his head in David's direction. "It's only been a couple of days and the two of you are complete wrecks. You need to sort this out and if you can't say it, sing it."
"I don't feel like singing." Wes told him glumly taking another bite.
"You're impossible." Kurt sighed. "He's your best friend; surely you don't want to lose him?"
"Of course I don't." Wes snapped.
"Then stop being such a… such a… boy." Kurt shot back. "I know it can be scary, but work out what your feelings are and then take appropriate action."
"I have a girlfriend." Wes pointed out.
"So?" Kurt lifted an eyebrow. "I dated a girl for a short period of time once but that doesn't make me any less gay."
"I d-don't… I don't l-love him like that." Wes said.
"Very convincing." Kurt drawled sarcastically. "Now try it again without the stutter."
"Just leave me alone." Wes grumbled.
"Fine." Kurt said picking up his coffee and last slice of toast. "But if you don't pull your act together soon you won't need to ask people to leave you alone." Kurt warned before moving away to join David and Blaine.
XXX
All through his morning lessons, Kurt had great difficulty concentrating. If his mind wasn't consumed with thoughts about the drama that was Wes and David, then he was drowning in speculation about what Blaine might reveal to him later that night. He wasn't sure if he wanted time to speed up so he could be alone with Blaine in his room hearing his not-quite-boyfriend's tale, or if he wanted time to move by slowly so he could perhaps cherish his ignorance of Blaine's past. Not knowing what he might find out filled him with a great deal of uncertainty, but he was sure nothing Blaine could say would ever make him feel differently about the other boy.
He looked to the boy beside him and found that Blaine seemed to be engrossed in his work. His brow was furrowed in concentration and his tongue was poking out between his lips slightly as he neatly copied down his notes. Forcing his eyes off of Blaine, Kurt focused on getting the notes written down too. At the end of class, they were all asked to write a five hundred word essay. The majority of the boys groaned but Kurt merely rolled his eyes. The only problem he had with writing essays was the fact he wrote too much and often went way over the required five hundred words. Not that the teachers of Dalton minded of course. They encouraged such academics unlike the majority of teachers at McKinley.
On the way to their next lesson, Kurt found his hand joined with Blaine's once again. He really enjoyed the feel of it and how nobody in the hallways batted an eyelid. If he had been at McKinley, Kurt was sure that he and Blaine would be soaked with slushie right now with half the hockey and football team crowding round them trying to beat the gay out of them. Things weren't like that at Dalton and Kurt really liked that fact.
Reaching their Calculus classroom, Kurt found that Wes and David had already arrived and were sitting in their assigned seats right beside one another. Though they were next to each other, the expressions on their faces indicated that both were completely lost in their own little worlds. Kurt and Blaine shared a concerned look before taking their seats. It was an agonisingly long lesson, even the teacher seemed uncomfortable from the tension that swirled around Wes and David.
It was a great relief when the bell rang signalling the lunch period. Kurt didn't think he'd ever seen students file out of a classroom at such a rapid pace. Unfortunately, escaping the awkwardness wasn't so easy for the likes of Kurt and Blaine. As Wes and David's close friends, they felt obligated to try and resolve things between them.
In the lunch hall, David took up a seat on their usual table while Wes opted to sit alone far away. After some deliberation, Blaine encouraged Kurt to sit with Wes before he headed towards David. A short while later, Blaine was making his way towards Kurt and Wes with David in tow.
At first, Kurt thought it was a good idea for them to sit together in a group of four again. That thought soon left his mind when Wes promptly stood up and moved away barely a second after David had sat down opposite him. Kurt bit his lip not sure what to say. Blaine placed a hand on David's shoulder and squeezed it in comfort.
"He just needs time." Blaine told him.
"A punch in the face is what he needs." David said and Kurt couldn't help but agree.
"This is difficult for him too, David." Blaine pointed out gently. "Try and respect that."
Feeling hot, Kurt shrugged his blazer off and rolled his shirt sleeves up. Looking round, he noticed most of the boys had done the same, some even unbuttoning the first few buttons of their shirts. However, he noticed that Blaine kept his blazer on and done up even though it was clear by the sheen of sweat on his forehead that he was hot.
"I should have just kept my mouth shut." David complained pulling Kurt out of his musings about Blaine.
"Hiding your feelings and bottling them up isn't healthy." Kurt said. "It's good that you found the courage to be honest. Now you just have to wait for Wes to find his courage."
"Whatever, I think he's made it clear that he doesn't care about me." David said miserably.
"That's not true." Blaine replied firmly. "Just… everything will be ok in the end, I promise."
XXX
At warblers practice, Wes and David still weren't on speaking terms which made for a very strained rehearsal. Kurt felt particularly sorry for Thad who was sat between his two fellow council members.
"If I may?" Kurt asked raising his hand in the air and Thad nodded for him to take the floor since Wes and David made no response. "Clearly with two of our members being in such a miserable state," He said referring to Wes and David. "We're not going to achieve very much, if anything at all, in this session. So, if there are no objections I'd like to do something a little more New Directions style today."
"What did you have in mind?" Thad asked.
"In my old Glee club," Kurt explained. "We would often perform solo pieces during rehearsals as a way of expressing ourselves. For example, if someone in the group had something they needed to say to somebody else but didn't know how to say it, they would sing it instead. It was a great way to release emotion."
"I don't feel like singing." Wes grumbled twirling his gavel between his hands.
"I don't feel like doing anything." David mumbled quietly.
"Well, if nobody minds, I do feel like singing." Kurt said looking to Thad for acceptance. After looking between the miserable boys either side of him, Thad gave Kurt a nod. "Thank you." Kurt nodded his head before handing Jeff a piece of sheet music and wordlessly asking him to accompany him by playing the piano.
Jeff positioned himself on the piano stool and warmed his fingers up by dancing them across the keys before looking to Kurt and waiting for a sign he was ready. Standing before his fellow warblers, Kurt nodded to Jeff before singing.
"Take all my vicious words, And turn them into something good." He had made his song choice with the hopes that both Wes and David would listen to the lyrics as well as Blaine since the shorter boy would need a little courage to tell him more of his story that night. "Take all my preconceptions, And let the truth be understood. Take all my prized possessions, Leave only what I need. Take all my pieces of doubt, And let me be what's underneath."
He chanced a look to Wes and David to see how they were taking the song. David was looking past Thad and trying to catch Wes' eye but the Asian boy was actively avoiding eye contact with anyone in the room, but Kurt could tell he was listening intently to the words.
"Courage is when you're afraid, But you keep on moving anyway." Kurt continued sharing a special look with Blaine at the word 'courage'. "Courage is when you're in pain, But you keep on living anyway. We all have excuses why, Living in fear something in us dies, Like a bird with broken wings, It's not how high he flies, But the song he sings. Courage is when you're afraid, But you keep on moving anyway. Courage is when you're in pain, But you keep on living anyway, You keep on living anyway."
Meeting Blaine's gaze, Kurt could tell the words were having a strong impact on him. He tried to offer a reassuring smile but it was difficult to do while singing. Looking to Wes and David again, Kurt saw that Wes now had his eyes closed and David was staring hopelessly out the window. Still sat between the two, Thad seemed to be enjoying Kurt's moving performance but not enjoying the seating arrangement.
"It's not how many times you've been knocked down, It's how many times you get back up." Kurt especially identified with those lyrics. Back at McKinley, he'd been knocked down time and time again, literally and metaphorically. But none of that mattered, what was truly important was how he picked himself up again every time and held his head high once more. "Courage is when you've lost your way, But you find your strength anyway."
Finally, Wes opened his eyes and turned to face David. As if sensing his stare, David turned his head back from the window to meet Wes' eye. Watching them, Kurt realised that David and Wes were one another's strength. He just hoped they could realise it too.
"Courage is when you're afraid," Kurt continued. "Courage is when it all seems grey, Courage is when you make a change, And you keep on living anyway, You keep on moving anyway, You keep on giving anyway, You keep on loving anyway." He finished his song with his eyes on Blaine's as the warblers applauded, apart from Wes and David who were too busy staring at one another to notice anything else. "Thank you, thanks Jeff." Kurt said clapping his hands together on behalf of Jeff's piano playing.
Sitting back down, the warblers turned their attention to Thad waiting for further instruction. After shaking his head at the boys either side of him he moved away from the table and stated that rehearsal was cancelled for that afternoon. The warblers made their way out of their practice room, Wes and David remaining seated. Kurt and Blaine were the last to leave, glancing at the two boys over their shoulders before closing the double doors.
"Do you really think they'll be ok?" Kurt asked.
"They'll be fine." Blaine said confidently. "Eventually." He added with a touch of hesitance that contradicted the first three words. "Come on; take a walk with me before dinner."
Hand in hand, they made their way outside and strolled about the grounds. They weren't the only students out and about enjoying the sunshine and gentle breeze, but Blaine was still the only one wearing his blazer. Kurt wanted to ask about it but something in his mind told him not to. Instead, he just enjoyed his carefree time spent with Blaine.
XXX
Back in the choir room, Wes and David were still sitting in silence with their eyes boring into one another. Having been best friends since they were ten years old, the two had learned to communicate without words. But as they sat together now, it was as if they were two strangers who spoke a different language.
"How's Shelly?" Wes asked referring to David's girlfriend and finally breaking the silence.
"She's a lesbian." David answered. "We just say we're together because she isn't ready to come out, her parents are really old fashioned."
"And you?" Wes asked. "Are you gay?"
"I don't know." David shrugged. "I only like you. No other guys and no girls, it's just you."
Another painful silence fell around them and David took to biting his nails. He didn't know what to do about their awkward situation. He could barely remember anything before he met Wes. There was the odd memory of a family party or holiday, but for the most part he didn't have memories before ten years old. Life before Wes just didn't seem worth remembering and his heart ached with the thought of his future ever being Wes-less. He needed the boy in his life.
They had become best friends instantly. Everybody knew them as Wes and David or David and Wes. There was never one without the other. They had been joined at the hip ever since they met. Most nights they would cuddle up and share a bed. That wasn't normal for straight teenage boys; surely it had to mean something. It certainly meant something to David.
"Remember when we were twelve?" David asked. "That day we got lost in the forest. We…"
"I remember." Wes interrupted cutting off the end of David's sentence.
"Didn't that mean anything to you?" David asked him. "It meant everything to me."
Wes didn't reply, he just turned his face away crossing his arms over his chest. David sagged down in his chair, reliving the memory of that day in the forest. All the trees and bushes had looked the same. They didn't know how to find their way back out. At first, they had made jokes about it, laughing together as they ran along through the dirt. But as the day got colder and darker, Wes started to get worried and upset. Taking his hand, David had assured him everything would be ok. Without even thinking, he had cupped Wes' cheek and pressed their lips together. After that, they had simply giggled like a pair of school girls before walking a few simple steps and then finding the exit. They'd never mentioned that kiss again.
"I had sex with Chloe." Wes spoke up referring to his girlfriend.
Feeling sick, David forced himself to ask when.
"About a month ago." Wes answered.
"Well, I hope you enjoyed yourself." David replied bitterly as he stood up heading for the door but Wes caught hold of his wrist.
"She broke up with me." Wes said. "I don't think she appreciated what I called her."
David didn't respond. He just stayed still, Wes' fingers warm around his wrist, waiting for Wes to say something else.
"I said your name." Wes finally admitted. "I was… being intimate with her… and I said your name."
Stepping back, David crouched so he was looking up at Wes. He placed his hands on his friend's thighs and lightly rubbed him through his grey uniform pants. He waited patiently for Wes to open his eyes and look down at him. When he did, David straightened up before settling himself onto Wes' lap. As Wes' hands flew to his hips and gripped him with a pressure that was almost painful, David expected to be pushed away, but he wasn't. Moving his hands to Wes' face, he waited a few seconds to give the other boy the opportunity to push him away. When he didn't, David took it as a sign to continue and he softly pressed his lips against Wes'.
"I'm scared." Wes whispered.
"Well I'm in love." David replied and Wes smiled weakly before pulling him to himself and kissing him harder. He didn't say he loved David back.
To Be Continued
(More of Blaine's past will be revealed next chapter, it was supposed to be in this one but Wes and David kinda happened lol)
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Love and Hugs, IceQueenRia xxx