The Day Carol Looked in the Mirror

Christie checked Carol's bites and contusions every day and had been pleased that the torn flesh was knitting back together. Her broken wrist had been set correctly and was now healing at a healthy rate. Carol was able to walk and move more normally and she wasn't taking any pain medications. It had been a week and Carol was looking forward to when it would be a month, and then a year. She hoped that there would come a time when she didn't count time by how long ago she had been captured by Ed. She dreamed about that at night sometimes but she had learned to jerk herself out of the dream and into reality. Daryl was always there beside her and he somehow knew to wake up and hold her close to him. He would listen to what she needed to say and never offered a solution. He let her cry or rant as she needed to and he never said, "It's over, it's alright now" because he knew it wasn't over until you could let it be over. She would love him forever for that, just letting her own her feelings without trying to make them go away.

She had slept all the way through the night and this morning she felt stronger. It was raining hard. She and Daryl had walked to Grandma Lydia's this morning in the rain jumping in every puddle of water like six year olds. They kicked their muddy shoes off on the porch and came into Lydia's living room with its shelves of books and family photos. Grandma Nancy might have lost some photos but she had always had duplicates made for Lydia and there were plenty on display.

It was a goodbye breakfast for Christie who was going back to work this evening because she was giving a month's notice to the hospital. Merle was going back with her to meet with some suppliers for the new store and because he couldn't quite bear to think of her in Charlotte without him. Jesse was driving to Charlotte tomorrow to see Michonne. She had gone back a few days ago and he had been quiet ever since. Andrea had become a permanent fixture at Lydia's and she dried Carol's hair with a towel and then handed it to Carol's to give Daryl's short hair a rubdown.

Carol hugged her grandmothers, "It smells delicious". Nancy nearly wept at the strength of her embrace. Lydia had fluffed Carol's wet curls and laughed, "You got your feathers wet" which made Carol smile because she had always said that when they came in from the rain or snow.

They ate in the dining room with its tall ceilings and stained glass windows. Robert McAllister had been a math teacher and a farmer but somehow he found time to create beauty with stained glass. He had filled his home with color and light and even this morning's watery light the dining room was transformed by his art. Lydia always sat at a certain place at her dining room table because she could see all of the windows from that seat. She would miss him every day of this life but she believed that she would see him again and there would be this marvelous light filled with color all around him.

Carol ate enough to please her grandmothers and for Daryl to tease her about it. She felt good to be alive and moving today. It had been a week. Both eyes were opening though the one was felt slightly swollen to her touch. After they ate, the men did the dishes while the women talked in the living room.

Carol had decided that today was the day that she stopped hiding from mirrors. There was an antique mirror over the fireplace in this room that Lydia had covered with a colorful scarf. She announced, "I want to take the scarf off the mirror."

Christie smiled at her, "You still have some bruises but they are faded."

The grandmothers nodded and Andrea looked at her critically, "Let me fix your hair." She fussed with Carol's hair but Carol suspected it was more to give her that final hug than the combing the curls down.

They stood with her in front of the mirror. The grandmas on either side and Andrea and Christie on the other side of the grandmas. Carol stepped forward and brought the scarf down and then looked at her reflection.

She had felt different and now she saw a different woman standing there. A woman with faint bruises on her face and one eye a little swollen. The short auburn curls framed her face and brought out crystal blue eyes. Her neck was long and graceful and when Carol smiled at her reflection she could see the women standing with her smile back at her. She was a happy woman and well loved, but there was a certain strength in her face that hadn't been there before.

Carol could see that the women with her loved her. The mirror showed that to her. It was in their eyes and their smiles and the way they stood as she watched them. She had a moment of sadness because she knew she would lose her grandmothers someday, but they were still feisty and active and she pushed that away. Andrea was so beautiful. Her blond hair was a halo but there was nothing angelic about Andrea except her surprising kindness and loving ways. Christie's eyes were windows to her strong and loving soul. They loved her. She was loved.

Daryl came into the room to find all the women standing before the mirror and for a second he was afraid for Carol. He thought that she looked beautiful but there were still bruises on her face and neck that she hadn't seen before.

Christie had seen him standing there and she took Lydia's hand and they went toward the kitchen with Andrea and Nancy following.

Daryl walked to the mirror and after taking Carol's hand stood beside her. She looked at the reflection. He was a good looking man. Blondish brown hair cut short, clean shaven, and dressed in a long sleeved blue t-shirt. He smiled at her in the mirror and she thought, Those two look like they belong together. She likes the way he looks, smells, and moves. She looks into his eyes and he never avoids her gaze the way he does other people. Those two are intimate. He talks to her in the middle of the night and she rubs her sore face against this shoulder and is comforted. She loves him. She will marry him because he is the one she wants by her side when she wakes up at night. She has never felt that way about anyone before and she never will feel that way about anyone else. His eyes are full of love for her and desire too. He wants her and that is a good thing because when she is healed completely they will be together in every sense of the word.

Daryl had never been articulate. Never been able to come up with words to express how he felt. He had shown Carol his love that evening in the dunes and then it had been easier to show her than to talk about what he felt. He had had so little love in his life that it was like a second language. He had to struggle to find the right words and he never sure how to express how he felt. Then Carol had been taken by Ed. He had been filled with rage and love that day that he found her in that shack. He had managed to bring her back here and to tamp the rage down because Carol needed tenderness that night. Nancy McAllister had let him work his rage out on the hay bales and when he came back in the late afternoon to Carol it would be controlled until the rage was dissipated by the thankfulness that she was alive. It had taken several long hot days in the hayfield but the rage was over. Sometimes he was overwhelmed by the depth of his love for her. He was still amazed that he had the capacity to love anyone that much. He just couldn't find the words to say how he felt.

He put his arms around her and pulled her in for a real kiss. She kissed him back and then he released her. Carol looked at the mirror. Her face was flushed and her eyes bright and she looked like a woman in love.

Daryl whispered in her ear, "I wish you could see what I see."

She met his eyes in the mirror, "I see enough to know that we will be happy together."

AN

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