The chapters that I had originally planned to post after the last chapter I decided to change a few things, so I've been rewriting when I can then last night I lost some of those rewrites. *face palm* Gosh, I should be in bed because I so need to get a decent night sleep. Things will be getting interesting since Teyla will be back on Atlantis in the next chapter.

Chapter 12

Atlantis… John exited out of his bathroom, with a large white towel tied around his waist, and a the small hand towel in his hand rubbing through his recent wash wet hair. Walking over to his window, he looked down at dark water below and the city. His quarters didn't exactly give him a panoramic view of the city, but he still could see a good part of it from this view. Darkness had descended on the city, so he could the area of the city now aglow with lights of colors.

John could feel the coolness of the night air as it brushed his face and his bare chest as he stood at window, but that wouldn't deter him from enjoying the view. Many times he had found himself doing the same thing on the outside balcony of the control tower, wearing more clothes of course. The city at night was illuminating. He knew it was a passion he didn't share alone.

John finally turned away from the window, not sure how he had stood there watching the city. He laid the small towel that was still in his hand across the back of the chair that stood near the stand by his window. He walked over to his bed reaching for the black T-shirt that lay across it. He started to get dress, but it wasn't as if he had planned to go anywhere tonight. He pulled the T-shirt over his head, pulling it down over his bare chest. He then grabbed the pair of his black sweats he had laid out on his bed too, stepping in the pair of sweats one leg at a time, then pulling them upward over his lean hips, then tightening the drawstrings in front.

He felt clean and more refresh after his shower. He had been so happy to take a shower to wash off the dirty and the drying mud that seem to had covered his entire lower body and most of his upper body too. He and the rest team had just returned from planet MLP42 within the last couple hours. As mission went, this one was rather uneventful even with Rodney excessive complaining about the conditions aside.

He was just glad that they only had to battle more the elements of mother nature than an ambush from an unforeseen enemies such as the Wraith or Michael's hybrids or whatever they were being call these days; they were still creepy looking to him. But it wasn't as if he had enjoyed, wadding through laurustinus that were taller than him either, in the pouring rain, and a terrain mudded by the torrential down pour that seemed to come out of nowhere. The footing had become treacherous in the higher elevation as they made their way back down the hilly areas of the woods that it was miracle they got out of there in one piece to the Stargate. His team had left the planet mostly unscaved. So he was grateful for that. There had only been one minor casualty.

Major Bolton, who he had finally picked to replace Teyla on his team, temporarily, had suffered a broken leg when the loose wet soil gave way from under him causing him to tumble several feet down the hill. They had been fortunate that was the only casualty considering how bad the conditions had become. So this was a casualty he could live with. Major Bolton would be fine in a few weeks per the doc's assessment, but his team would be a man down. He hadn't been in a hurry the first time to find a replacement for Teyla. And that hadn't change.

It had taken him a few of days to find someone he thought would be a good suitable replacement for Teyla on the team. He had finally gave into Mr. Woolsey continuing pressure. So he finally decided to select Major Steven Bolton. Major Bolton was a good enough solider in his opinion. The young man was strong and he was also intelligent, although he had limited service experience and this was his first tour of duty on Atlantis.

He found that he generally did like the young man who at times seemed to be a little out of his element when he had been in the company of Ronon and Rodney. Two different personalities if there ever was one. He had considered for a short time or at the very least had entertained the idea of putting Lt. Lorne on his team. He respected the Lt. greatly. But he had nixed that idea pretty early because the Lt. Lorne was his second and had his own team.

Both Rodney and Ronon had seemed to take the changes in stride for the most part keeping their thoughts and opinions to themselves when it came to Teyla's absence or the newest member of their team which suited him fine because he really didn't care discuss it with anyone.

John gave himself a mental note to check on the Major's progress tomorrow before he sat down to work on his mission report about the mission after his briefing meeting with Mr. Woolsey.

John looked around his room. He was kind of feeling a little bit tired too. For it had truly been a long day. His eyes finally paused to rest on his bed. His bed should be a welcome sight considering how tired he was starting to feel. John continued to look at his bed for moment, frowning. For he knew his bed wouldn't exact bring him any solace. Neither would sleep or his dreams bring him any real peace of mind.

So although right now he wanted to gladly fall into his bed and get a few hours of uninterrupted sleep. The problem with that was that he found that sleep didn't come easy to him most nights, especially since arriving on Atlantis. After he had awoke the Wraith on their first mission in the Pegasus then having to live with the fear that they could be attacks by their enemies who numbers seemed to have grown a bit lately. Him being able to sleep soundly was rarely an option to him; his guard was always constantly up, having to be ready at a moment notice.

But the last couple of the months had been the worst by far. Vivid nightmares had taken resident in his dreams lately along with the same old demons, there were new nightmares involving Teyla and now Torren. And he couldn't shake those feeling in his waking hours either.

Something didn't feel right to him. Apart from him questioning whether Teyla and Torren were truly safe living among the Athosian since Michael's whereabouts was still a mystery. He knew Michael still coveted Teyla and Torren, especially Torren for reasons that were still unclear to them. And in his heart, he felt that Teyla and Torren would be far safer here on Atlantis than on their new homeworld, considering Michael's knack of turning up at places, uninvited, where you least expected him to be. There's still too much they didn't know about Michael's operation.

And too many snagging questions. Questions he would like some answers to. Like how Michael knew of Teyla's pregnancy and her relationship with Kanaan when she had kept it from him and her friends. He supposed some of her people would knew of their relationship, but it was shock to the rest of them, certainly to him at any rate. He hadn't expected Teyla to be dating anyone.

He realized now that was his first mistake. Teyla was a beautiful woman. It had been probably foolish to think that she wouldn't find someone. He himself hadn't lived like a monk. There had women who'd shown him interest or had gotten his interest like Chaya. There had been more than one instance were he'd taken what they had offered him. He had made no promises of commitments because he had knew where his commitments lie. They had been and were to this expedition to Atlantis, to the people he considered his family now.

He thought he knew Teyla as well as anyone, but yet she had chose not tell him or anyone on Atlantis about Kanaan and yet somehow, Michael was aware of her relationship with Kanaan relationship then her pregnancy. Something was definitely off.

But of course, he had said nothing of his concerns to Teyla during their talk before she left the city. Maybe, he should have he thought now, but he didn't think it would have done much good if he had. He knew Teyla felt her responsibility to her people strongly and he had understood that all too well. And if he knew Teyla like he thought he did, Teyla was and still probably blaming herself for happened to her people. No matter if he or anyone had told her differently. Carrying guilt was something he knew all too well.

John sat down on the edge of his bed. Usually when he felt like this he would try to read a book until he fell asleep, but maybe a movie would distracted and relaxed him enough to get some sleep.

John reached for his laptop on the nightstand by his bed.

xxxx

Somewhere in the Pegasus…

The opening of a door cast a stream of light into the dimly lightly room, a shadow appear at the entrance. The eerily silence of the room, now suddenly interrupted by the footsteps of the figure that entered the room, the sound of the footsteps echoing throughout the room then suddenly stopping.