Crazy trouble with love part 5

Stacy and Dipper

Series: Gravity Falls

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Darlene huffed while pacing inside the house she had at the Mystery Mountain which she used to keep up appearances and to bring men in just in case she had to try a little underhanded tactics before bringing them up to the caves to feed on. "Where is that girl, she should have been here ten minutes ago!"

That's when a knock was at the door. "Aunt Darlene? Are you like, in there and stuff?"

"Yes, come on in sweetie, I've been waiting for you."

The door opened and a girl about twelve years old came in. She had wavy blond hair that was lighter than Darlene's with sunglasses on her head. She wore a light blue shirt with some black jeans and red shoes. She was texting on a phone while blowing a bubble from some gum before it popped and she chewed it back up.

"Come have a seat wherever, I need your full attention for this." She said as her niece nodded before sitting down on the couch.

"So, like, what is it auntie?" She asked without looking from her phone. "You like, called me up and said there was some guy or some junk giving you problems, and then like, said he ran off? Was he like a date you had, or was he gonna be like your dinner?"

"He was going to be dinner, he was nice and tender too, but then these kids busted in and rescued him, can you believe that?" frowned Darlene sitting on the kitchen counter. "I had everything set up too, don't they know it's rude to interrupt a woman when she's eating? Sometimes I don't know what's with kids today."

"Like, big time. So many of them are like boring and junk. This one boy I met was like, so cute, but he wouldn't shut up about sports. He was hardly good enough for a midnight snack." remarked the girl blowing another bubble.

"Yeah, so this is where you come in, I did some looking around and found out where that old guy and thoese kids live." She said as she held up a flier to the mystery shack.

"So like, are you gonna go there and eat him in front of those dorks or what?" She asked as she blew a bubble.

"Nope, you're going there kiddo, not me." She said, making her niece pop her bubble in surprise.

"Wait, hold the phone, say what?"

"Yep, and before you begin you need this sweetie, you haven't made your first human kill yet, you've been living off goats and starbucks your entire life and, it's time you left the nest."

"What? But auntie, my mom says I'm doing just fine. I should be good to kill around….in a few years, depends on what the latest trends turns to cause like, I've been meaning to keep up with the whole sandals thing."

"No, I was your age when I made my first kill, your mother is coddling and spoiling you, have you ever caught any food by yourself?"

"Like, dug, course I have. Last week I caught a deer all on my own." She replied holding her finger up.

"Well did you eat it?"

"Uh...I would have, but...I'm trying to watch my figure. Hopin' it catches the boy's eyes."

"See? It's worse than I thought, you haven't even killed anything yet, what are you gonna do when you catch a boy, stare at him? It's time you left the nest and gained some independence, plus, it's starting to get kind of cramped, so you can start a new nest in gravity falls."

She groaned and threw her head back. "Like, fine auntie, I'll try."

"Great, I'll come visit you in a month to see how you're doing, now get out there and drop them dead beautiful!" She said as she gave her the flier before pushing her to the door.

"Wait, like aren't you comin' with just in case I need help?" She asked while grabbing the doorframe to stay inside. "I mean like, wouldn't you like to come by and eat that old geezer?"

"Nope, I got a hunk coming over soon, plus this is about you gaining independence, so you're on your own now, I've already called your parents and they've agreed, plus they know who I am so I can't surprise them." She said as she tried to push her niece out of the door. "Stacy quit being so stubborn."

"But I'm not ready, just let me stay here!" She said as her hands began to slowly slip.

Darlene sighed and slowly stopped pushing. "Fine, you can stay."

Stacy sighed in relief and let go, right before Darlene quickly pushed her out and slammed the door shut. "Hey!"

"Now go out there and make a nest in gravity falls! And get that kid!" Darlene shouted as a red convertible driven by a man with tan skin and white hair pulled into the driveway. "And hurry, my hunk is here!"

Stacy groaned and stamped off. "Oldie." She grumbled as she looked at the flier she had been given. "Mystery shack, huh?"

Over at said shack, Dipper was busy lifting boxes up while Mabel was dusting some new exhibits. "Man, what does Grunkle Stan put in these things, rocks?" Dipper groaned as he tripped and the spilled the contents of the box to reveal painted rocks.

"Hey be careful, it took me the entire morning to get those ready. Now get them in the display case. I got a bus of tourists coming by and I wanna make sure they see the all important 'Rainbow Rocks from the Earth's Core'."

"Of course, then maybe they'll pay to get some 'Rainbow Gravel' after they see them." Dipper said as he rolled his eyes.

"Don't get smart with me, although, that does sound good for souvenirs. I'll be right back." He turned and ran off back to the house.

"I really have to stop talking." Dipper muttered as a bus began to pull into the lawn of the mystery shack with a hitchhiker on the roof.

"Like, so this is it? Lame." Muttered Stacy getting off the roof on the other side and walking around while moving behind the crowd with ease. "Ok, like, now to find that kid who ruined Aunties dinner." She said as she walked towards the mystery shack.

The crowd entered while the tourists began taking pictures just as Stan walked out with an eyepatch on and a smile. "Welcome to the mystery shack, come and see our newest attraction, the 'Rainbow Rocks From the Earth's Core!' over here!"

All of them moved over to a display case of the rocks while some of them 'oohed' and took pictures while Stacy rolled her eyes.

"This is ridiculous, how could anyone believe this garbage?" She said before spotting Soos. 'OMG, auntie never said anything about mole men being here!'

"Yo Dipper, where'd Stan say he wanted this?" Soos asked while lugging a stuffed sheep with three unicorn horns.

"Um, I think he said he wanted it behind the plaster mold of big hands feet." He said as he pointed to the mold of two regular feet.

"Gotcha." He said as he began to walk away.

"Now, to make sure no one tries to sue Grunkle Stan. Again." He said with a groan before feeling someone tap him on the shoulder.

"Like, excuse me."

"Sorry, no refunds, mystery shack is not liable for any injuries on premise, and we don't have a bathroom." He said quickly.

"I'm not here for that junk, just turn around." The person said in annoyance as he felt them grab his shoulder and turn him around.

He saw it was a girl around his age who blew a bubble from the gum she had. "Oh, sorry about that. Are you here with the tour group?"

"Yeah, something like that." She said as she looked Dipper over. "My names Stacy so like, what's yours?"

"Dipper, and since you're here, let me remind you that any nifty souvenir can be purchased right over there." he spoke pointing where Wendy was while inside he was annoyed repeating the same line Stan made him remember.

"I'm not interested in any of that junk, though I do like, have my eye on something in here." She said as she winked at him.

Dipper blushed a little. "Oh, well...maybe I could help you find that." He replied trying to sound smooth.

"I'd really like that." She said with a smile as she grabbed his arm and clung to it.

"Uh, wanna see the town? I mean if you're new and haven't been here." He quickly said.

"Like, sure, it's a date." She said with a smile as she began to drag him towards the door. 'This is great, as he shows me around maybe I can find somewhere to make my new nest.'

"D-D-Date?" He spoke up with a brighter blush as they left the shack. 'Woah! Score! Score! SCORE!'

"Yep, just you and me cutie~" She said as she blew a bubble. "So what do you do for fun around here?"

"W-w-well, I uh, I think there's an arcade in town?" He said, deciding that telling her he explored the forests with a journal on the supernatural was a bad idea.

"Like, cool." She smiled while she had him lead the way. 'Boys everywhere are suckers for that kinda junk.'

It was a short walk before they reached the outskirts of the small town. He lead her to the arcade he tried out before with a few new games set up and with kids all around. "So, like, any good games in here?" She asked as she looked around.

"Um uh...I think they got a new shooting game if you're interested?"

"Like, lead the way."

"O-ok. He said as he lead her to a new game that two people could sit down in that had mounted plastic guns that you moved around and shot with. "I think I have enough money for both of us to play." He said as he pulled out a dollar and put it in the machine as they sat down.

"Sounds like fun." 'Not.'

"Ok, it's starting." He said as the words 'arachnid killer.' appeared on the screen.

"Wait, arachnid? Like, in spiders?" She said nervously as the title disappeared and the screen showed a jeep in a forest.

"Yeah, it's a game where you shoot spiders to get points, ready?" Dipper asked as spiders began to appear on the screen.

"Uh...sure." She spoke with a gulp.

"Great, then let's do this!" He said with a grin as he began to shoot the spiders on the screen, making them explode each time he shot one.

'Oh god! That's so gross!' She thought seeing each one fall while trying to keep from screaming.

"Hey, why aren't you shooting, it's multiplayer so you can shoot with me."

"Oh, uh, just about to." She replied while shooting at the screen, but her shots missed. "Heh, guess I'm not that good."

"It's ok, the boss hasn't shown up yet so we should be good for now." He replied as he kept killing them while Stacy turned a little green at the sight.

"I uh, think maybe we should go try a different game, what do you think?" She said as she tried to avoid throwing up.

"Oh, sure thing." He replied as they set the guns down. "Sorry if that was a little gross."

"I-it's fine, let's just go somewhere else, ok?" She replied rubbing her throat as they walked away from it. 'Like oh god! That was so so so gross!'

"Ok, um, would you like to leave the arcade?"

"Like, maybe just try a different game." She said as she tried to get the spiders exploding out of his head. 'Just a little bit more, than I should take him somewhere reclusive before knocking him out before I go and like, find a cave.'

"Well, what about this?" He asked as they reached a game with seats and wheels in front of them.

"OK, so like, what is it?" She asked curiously as he sat down.

"A simple driving game, you've never seen one before?"

"N-no, I just uh, never really seen one like this before." She said as she sat down. Dipper put some coins in while she saw the lights count down while she held the wheel before feeling like the seat moved back and the cars went forward. 'Whoa, this is crazy!' She thought as she tried to drive the car with little success. 'Like, how's anyone supposed to do this?'

"You ok Stacy, your wheel must have a glitch or something, you keep driving into the walls."

"Oh! Uh, yeah that must be it." She replied while trying to turn the wheel as her car went back on the road and it swerved around while she tried to get a feel of the game. They played for a bit more before Dipper won the race with Stacy not even finishing one lap. "So uh, Dipper do you like, wanna go somewhere else?"

"Sure, wanna go get a bite to eat?"

"Yeah, that sounds great." She said with a grin as she grabbed his arm and began to lead him out of the arcade before spotting a nearby alley.

"Well let me lead, I can get us to the diner in no time."

"No no, I think I saw it on the bus, I can get us there," she said as she began to lead him towards the alley. 'Time to make my move.'

"Ok, if you say so." Dipper said as they entered the alley. "Um, you sure this is the right way though?"

"Like, don't you trust me?" She asked with a flirty look.

"Y-yes, I do." He said with a blush.

"Then trust me, we're going the right way." She said as she spotted a large dumpster. 'Yes, I can knock him out there and get him out of town without anyone seeing me, then all I have to do is find a cage quick then I can enjoy my meal.'

'Something feels off about this.' Dipper thought with a frown as Stacy lead him deeper into the alley and closer to the dumpster.

"We're here."

"What are you talking about, we're in an alleyway behind a dumpster, not the diner." Dipper said in confusion.

She turned to him and smirked before grabbing him and threw him against the dumpster.

"What the-?!" He said before hitting the dumpster and leaving a small imprint of his body on it before crumbling to the ground like a rag doll.

"Like, perfect." She picked him up with ease and ran down the alley and looked around to see if anyone was around to notice. Luckily it seemed that no one was around and she turned towards the woods and began to run. 'If I can't find a cave I'll have to like, use the trees or something.' She thought as she began to look around to see if there was any caves nearby as she entered the woods.

So far she saw trees all around, but a bit farther down she spotted a hole in the side of a tall hill. "Like, that'll work." She said with a grin as she ran towards the hole.

Dipper groaned in her grasp as he noticed things were darker than before and started to notice he was in some cave. "W-what happened?" He groaned as he began to move, alerting Stacy that he was waking up.

'Like, crap! I gotta start putting up my web.' She thought as she began to shift her legs into a spiders legs and thorax. She climbed up the side of the cave and started sending her webbing out which stuck on the surface as she moved around to spread it.

"Ugh, Stacy, what's going on?" He groaned as he tried to sit up. His eyes slowly adjusted and spotted the thorax before going wide eyed. "And what in the world is that?!"

"Hey, didn't your mother ever tell you it's like, rude to stare at a lady's thorax?" She said as she kept quickly spinning the web as she kept her hold on Dipper.

"Wait, thorax, webbing, you're an Arachnimorph!" He said as he tried to get out of her grip.

"Ding ding ding, we have a winner!" She said with a grin as she kept spinning her web. "Now hold on, Once I'm done we can like, get to dinner."

"What!" He spoke while struggling, but she was stronger then she looked. "You don't wanna eat me, I'm nothing but bones."

"No, you have enough meat on you to satisfy me, I'm watching my figure, plus I have to eat you, my auntie demanded it after you stole her last dinner." She said as she finished spinning her web. "There, all done, now like, hold still. I don't wanna get blood on my top." She said as she opened her mouth to show rows of sharp teeth.

"Ahhh!" He screamed as he he flailed his arms in a desperate attempt to get away.

She slowly moved her teeth near his throat while he braced for the pain, but she moved away and let out a groan. "I can't do this junk!"

"Huh?" He asked in confusion as she dropped him onto the web.

"Like, this is so gross!" She shuddered. "I don't wanna eat people, I like, seen what you eat. All that grease, fat, ugh!"

"So..I'm not going to die? You aren't going to eat me?" Dipper asked in confusion.

"Like, no." She sighed. "I didn't even wanna do this. My auntie wants me to eat my first human cause she says my moms 'spoiling' me." She air quoted. "Ugh, what I wouldn't give for a hot frappuccino right now."

"Um...I'm sorry but I can't help you with that, so if you could just let me go…" He said carefully as she shook her head.

"No way, if I let you go she'll know I didn't do it and you'll tell everyone in town. So not gonna happen." She said as she turned around and pointed her thorax at him as her back two legs picked him up.

"Wait! You don't gotta do this!" He spoke up quickly.

"Like, sorry, but I gotta, otherwise I'm in big trouble, so hold still, ok?" She said before blowing a bubble with her gum.

Dipper panicked as she shot webbing out before he moved away and grabbed it before he started tugging on it, making her stumble backwards. "Not gonna happen!"

"Hey, like, stop it!" She said as she tried to regain her balance while shooting out more webbing so he couldn't pull on it again.

He went wide eyed since it slowly started covering him before using his full body to fall back, causing him to fall off the web as she grabbed onto her web with her arms.

"I said to hold still! This is why!" She said in annoyance as he dangled in the air six feet off the ground.

"Well if you bothered to listen you'd know I can help you out!" He spoke up while fighting against the webbing. "But if you try to hold me I can't tell you."

"I like, don't need help, all I have to do is find like a starbucks and catch some food then I can live here in this cave!" She said as she began to pull him back up towards her.

"You could come live us!" He offered desperately as she brought him up on the web.

"To that old shack where the man who was almost my aunty's meal lives? Why, here I'm free to do what I want."

"Well yeah, but what if you find something that could eat you? I've seen all sorts of big stuff and weird monsters."

"Really? But like, how would you and an old shack protect me, an Arachnimorph?" She asked as she pointed her thorax at him again.

"Well we'd be like roommates. You know look out for each other. You get a free place to live and not eat us, and we have someone to help us if we get into some trouble. By us I mean me and my sister though."

"I dunno, I get a free place here, you're never going to leave so it's like a roommate, and I still won't eat anyone, so like, what's the difference?" She asked as she began to spray web at him again as her back legs turned him around as she sprayed.

"Uh….um….well what if something sneaks in and eats me while you're away?" He asked while she stopped. "No roommate and it would show your place is not protected well."

"Hmmmm, I guess that is true….but couldn't the same happen at that old shack?"

"Not as often as in the wild. Me and my sister have tons of stuff to use if we get attacked, plus we sorta fought a ton of gnomes who wanted to make her their queen, but I doubt they'll come by again anytime soon."

"Hmmm, maybe...but what if Auntie comes to visit and sees you and me living in the shack?" She asked as she set him down on the web which stuck to his half formed cocoon.

"Well if you told her about living on your own, then what if you showed her a photo? Like, maybe make it seem like you ate me and went to live by yourself?" He suggested, making her smile.

"That could work, then she would leave me alone hopefully! But to do so, I need to finish your cocoon." She said as she stared down at him. "Like, if I don't do that and make it look like I at least drained you dry, it won't work as much or some junk like that." She said with a smile as she picked him up again and began to spray him with the webbing again.

"You're really not gonna bite me, right?" He asked nervously as the cocoon began to reach his neck.

"Not a lot, maybe a small love bite, but that'll be it, just something that looks like I'm about to drain you dry." She replied while turning his head. "Hold still, and try not to flinch or this is gonna hurt, like a lot."

"O-ok." He said nervously as she brought out her phone as she brought her face closer to his neck. He felt her teeth slowly touch his skin and tried to keep from screaming. 'It's just for show, she's not going to bite me, she's not going to bite me, she's not going to bite me.' He chanted mentally as he tried not to freak out.

Stacy hit the record button and lightly pricked Dipper while making slurping sounds and whispering. "Try to make it sound like you're dying in agony or some junk."

"O-ok…." He whimpered before letting loose the scream he was holding in. "AAHHHHH, PLEASE DON'T KILL ME, PLEASE STOP IT, STOP IT!"

Stacy kept recording and did the sounds before hitting stop. "And scene! Wow, like, you did pretty good."

"T-t-thanks…" He said weakly as pulled her face away from him before she put his cocoon on her back.

"Like, I'll let her know I drank you slowly to make up for the lack of blood and I got rid of your body cause of all the fat. That should work." She said as she shot a strand of web at the ceiling before jumping off the web as she used the strand to slowly get to the ground.

"So you're gonna be staying with us?" Dipper asked as she landed on the ground.

"Yeah, it beats that old cave, ya know?" She said as she began to move towards the cave's entrance. "So, is there enough space for me? Cause I only get to sleep in a web."

"Um, yeah, I think so...you can let out of this cocoon now." Dipper said as he tried to get free.

"Like, after we get there and I find a nice and comfy spot." She said as she made her way through the forest to the mystery shack.

Dipper sighed while Mabel was playing with Waddles on the porch.

"Who's a good pig, you're a good pig!" She said happily as she hugged the pig as Grunkle Stan came out on the porch.

"Hey Mabel, have you seen Dipper anywhere, I got a new bus full of canadian tourists and I need the preteen wolfboy."

"Like, he's right here." Spoke Stacy making them look up and go wide eyed while Dipper tried raising a hand in greeting.

"Hey guys, I brought a guest home, can she stay with us?" He asked sheepishly.

"What the?!" spoke Stan while Waddles made a terrified sound and ran inside with Mabel herself frozen in shock. "Oh god, is Darlene here? I'm going to go get a shovel, she ain't getting me twice!"

"Like, no way. My aunty sent me here at first to like eat this guy and some junk." She pointed at Dipper. "But like, we did some stuff, talked and junk, and he offered me a place here. In return I don't eat him or any of you."

"Ok...but two questions, do we have to worry about your aunt coming down here and two, can you stay like that for tourists?" Stan said with a grin.

"Like, I'm gonna send her this recording of me 'eating' Dipper here so she thinks I'm my own Arachinimorph, so nah. Second, if there's gonna be any of me showing off to them, I want in. A girl's gotta keep up with the latest trend."

"Done, anything else you need to make them give me money?" Stan asked with a grin.

"Like, I could make like a bunch of web decorations or some junk." She offered before getting an idea. "Or I could make a big web on the side of the shack with a 'victim' trapped in my web." She said with a smile as she looked at Dipper.

"Uh, why are you looking at me?"

"Great, I love it, take whoever you need to make this work, this is going to be a bigger hit than the preteen werewolf boy!" Stan said with a grin as he went back into the mystery shack to start making merchandise before tourists arrived.

"So….what sort of stuff did you two do?" Asked Mabel.

"He took me on a date and I brought him to my home before he suggested we like, move in together." Stacy said with a smile.

Mabel gasped while Dipper blushed. "Wow! I knew Dipper wanted a girlfriend, but I didn't think he was like that."

"I-it's not like that Mabel, she was going to eat me!" He said with a blush. "Don't go making it sound all weird!"

"What's so weird Dipper, we went on one date and now we're living together, it doesn't sound so weird to me." She said as she began to walk around the outside of the mystery shack. "Now where should I make the web?"

"Web?" spoke Mabel following. "Why do you need a web for?"

"Like, I've slept in one since I was in an egg. It's the only way I can get to sleep." She said as she kept looking around. "Plus, I just agreed to help that old guy by being an attraction and where else would a spider girl be other than a web, especially with my hostage I've taken." She said with a smile as she looked at Dipper.

"Well since you two are already so close, you can make a web near his bed." Smiled Mabel before guiding her upstairs. "Quick question, do you eat pig?"

"Sure, I love ham, but I haven't been able to kill anything yet." She said as they reached the twin's room.

"Well then let me make this clear. See that pig?" asked Mabel pointing to Waddles munching on a slipper. "He's not on the menu."

"Fine, but if he eats my clothes I'll eat him, ok?" She said as she began to spin a small web above Dipper's bed. "I should probably make one outside the window so people aren't entering our room to get a look at us." She said as she looked at the window.

"That would stop us from having an escape route." Spoke Dipper. "And now would be a good time to let me go."

"Then I'll use the window to get out and make it somewhere else on the roof and not yet Dipper, I'm going to need you as my hostage for the tourists, remember?" She said with a grin as she finished the web before moving towards the window.

"Have fun you two! Don't have too much fun!" Laughed Mabel.

"What? No! I didn't agree to this!" Dipper shouted as he tried to struggle as she climbed out of the window.

"Like, I think I'm gonna like this place already."