A/N: Trigger warning - blood, self harm, suicidal talk. Tried to update quickly so I didn't leave you all hanging! Please keep letting me know your thoughts, I love to hear them :)

Chapter 12.

Regina unlocked the door, now she was really confused and worried, Emma still wasn't answering her phone. She put her bag and keys down, noting Emma's phone on the couch; she was home, good.

"Emma?" she called out as she made her way to the teenagers room, "Honey?" she knocked as she opened the door to an empty room. She frowned and made her way to the bathroom, knocking lightly, "Emma?" Still,no answer. She checked the door, it was unlocked and so she pushed it open.

Regina's mind blanked for a moment before she could take in the scene before her. A bloody razor next to the blonde teenager and blood still spilling from the wounds of her wrist. Emma appeared to be asleep, or passed out, Regina couldn't tell as she fell to her knee's beside the teenager and swiped a towel from the rack beside her and securing it around Emma's wrist. She pulled out her phone, dialling 911.

"Ambulance…my girlfriend, she's cut her wrist, there's blood everywhere and she's passed out," Regina was trying to be calm but the shakiness in her voice and the pain in her throat betrayed her, "I don't know how long ago, I only just got home… " she gave her address and took a few instructions before hanging up.

She placed her hands on the teenagers face, "Wake up, Emma," she demanded, "Please, come on, honey, open your eyes," she tapped the girl's face gently, the tears brimming out over her eyes, "Emma, I swear to god," she grinded her teeth, "I need you to open your eyes."

Emma groaned as her eyelids began to flurry and she swallowed down a dry throat.

"That's it, sweetheart," Regina sighed with relief.

"No," Emma croaked as her eyes opened, "Don't wake me up," she tried to push the older woman away.

"Honey, please," Regina pleaded, "It's okay."

"It's not okay," Emma sobbed, "It's never okay and it's never going to be okay. Go away, please," she tried to take the towel from her wrist but Regina wouldn't let her.

Regina's eyes widened, "No, Emma, you will be okay, I know you will."

"Why did you wake me up?" Emma growled, "God, I can't even kill myself right," she leaned her head back against the wall behind her, tears streaming down her cheeks.

Regina bit her lip, chewing it anxiously, "Honey," she said slowly, "Did you do this to try and kill yourself?"

Emma shrugged, "You should have let me," she choked.

"Is she going to be okay?" Regina asked the doctor anxiously, as he stitched up her wounds.

He grimaced but nodded, "She'll be fine, physically, but we'll need to keep her in for 24 hours, it's hospital policy."

Regina nodded, "Right," she swallowed, "Can I stay with her?"

The doctor nodded again, "Of course."

Emma remained silent, staring into space as the two conversed. She had hardly spoken a word since the ambulance had bought her in.

"There we go," the doctor smiled, "All done. You did lose a bit of blood, so you may feel low on energy for a while, so feel free to sleep if you wish. A psychiatrist will be up to see you later."

Emma rolled her eyes, "Why? I already see a psych."

The doctor was surprised that the young girl had vocalised for the first time in nearly an hour, "Again, it's policy. We need to be assured that you aren't going to do this again and provide any support that you may need."

Emma just glared at the doctor as Regina thanked him, before he left the room.

Emma turned away from her, pulling the blanket tight around her and closing her eyes.

Regina sighed and put her hand in blonde hair, "Sweetheart," she couldn't keep the hurt out of her voice, "Please don't shut me out."

Emma shook her head, trying to dislodge Regina's hand but the older woman refused to move.

"I know you're mad at me," she started, "But I love you. You know I couldn't just let you…die," her voice cracked on the word, "I'm sorry if you think I was being selfish, but I don't know what I would do without you. Please, look at me."

Emma was grinding her teeth so hard it hurt, "I never should have taken your class," she said quietly.

That stung, "Emma…"

"No, I don't mean… I just mean, if I hadn't…if we hadn't met, I wouldn't have… I'm sorry."

Regina frowned and moved around to the other side of the bed so she could look at Emma's face, "Honey, I don't understand what you're trying to say."

"I'm sorry," Emma mumbled, "I should have run away or something."

"No, you shouldn't have – "

"I'm a bad person," Emma let the lump in her throat take over and allowed a sob to escape, "I'm bringing back all those bad memories for you… your friend…"

Regina's eyes widened; that's what Emma was worried about right now? About the memories this stirred in her about her past? That was what she felt guilty about?

"Emma, you are not a bad person," she said firmly, "Don't you dare beat yourself up for how this affects me, dear. What happened to my friend… yes, sometimes you remind me of her, but that's not something you need to take on. I love you, Emma, and you know I couldn't let you…"

"I know," Emma admitted sadly, "I get it. I just want to go home, I hate hospitals."

Regina smiled sympathetically, "I know, sweetie, but you can't. Not yet," she moved her hand over the young girl's cheek, "But I'm going to stay right here with you," she whispered, "I know it doesn't feel like it, but it's going to be okay."

"I just felt so desperate," Emma whispered, "I can't control anything, I've never been able to and the older I get, the worse it gets. I'm going to flunk out of school," she broke eye contact as she looked down ashamedly.

Regina bit her lip, "Emma, you can pass, you just need to do extra work. And anyway, even if you don't, it's okay. We can figure it out, we just need to sit down and look at the options with a clear head."

Emma looked back up at the brunette, "Maybe," she said unconvincingly, sniffing, "Everything's just moving so fast…"

"I know," Regina said softly, "It's okay, let's not talk about it right now, okay? Can I get you anything, are you hungry or thirsty or – "

Emma's eyes welled up, the tears spilling out, "Can you please just hold me for a while?"

Regina nodded, "Of course," she sat down and pulled the blonde into her chest, stroking her hair for minutes on end until the teenager was breathing lightly. Regina kissed her on the forehead and reached for Emma's phone.

"Swan," Belle breathed out, taking in the image of sleeping friend in the hospital bed, she looked to Regina, "She's going to be okay, right?"

Regina moved closer to the distressed girl, "She'll be okay," she confirmed softly.

"What happened?" Belle asked as she wiped her eyes.

Regina put an arm around Belle, squeezing her shoulders, "I think everything just…got on top of her, she's failing a couple of her classes, I think it just pushed her over the edge."

Belle nodded, still snivelling, "She's self harmed before… but she hasn't been in hospital in a long time… was she trying to," she paused, biting her trembling lip, "kill herself?"

Regina didn't realise her grip tighten on the young brunette, "Sweetheart," she started, pausing, thinking how best to answer, "I think…yes," she settled on the direct truth, "I think it was a suicide attempt," she whispered and embraced Belle as she turned into her chest, crying her eyes out, "Shh, I know, honey, but she's going to be okay. We're going to get her through this."

Belle pulled away, continuing to wipe her eyes, she nodded, "Okay," she sniffed, "I'm really glad she found you."

Regina's eyes widened, "Thank you," she said softly, "You know she can fight this, Belle, she is a very strong woman."

Belle nodded, "Yeah, I know she is. It's just not fair," she whispered, "She's a good person, why does she have to go through this?"

"I don't know, dear," Regina said sadly, "All we can do is support her."

Belle nodded slowly, "You're right. I'm going to get some water, my head's hurting a little, do you want something?"

"Some water would be great, and why don't you grab Emma some a chocolate bar for when she wakes up? She always love to munch on them when she's down," Regina smiled.

Belle smiled back, "Okay, I'll be right back."

"Belle," Emma spotted her friend the moment she woke up and cleared her dry throat.

"Swan," Belle stood up and rushed to her side, wrapping her arms around her friend, "I'm so glad you're okay."

Emma returned the embrace, burying her face in her friend's shoulder, "I'm sorry," she mumbled.

Belle sighed, "It's okay, Em," she pulled back and cupped her friends face with her hands, "Please, don't give up," she said, tears shining in her eyes.

Emma bit her lip before looking down, "I'm scared, Belle," she admitted.

"I know you are," Belle nodded, "But just let us help you," she glanced at Regina, "We can do this together."

Emma couldn't help smiling at her friends attitude, "I hope so," she mumbled.

"Good. Hope is important," Belle claimed, "You know I'll do anything for you, right?" she asked wide-eyed.

The blonde nodded slowly, "I know, Belle. I just feel so…lost."

Belle couldn't erase the concern etched on her features, "So, let us in, Em. Let us find you," she whispered.

Emma raised her eyes to meet her friends and pulled her close, burying her head in her chest again, feeling the brunette pull her close and kiss her on top of her head.

"I love you, Em," Belle murmured.

It wasn't until the next day that the hospital-assigned psychiatrist paid Emma a visit.

"I just need to ask you a few questions to try and figure out where your head is at," the psychiatrist explained.

"Uh-huh," Emma claimed, wishing they'd let Regina stay in the room with her.

"When you cut your wrist yesterday…were you trying to take your life?"

Emma played with the blankets as she chewed her life, "Yes," she said quietly.

The psychiatrist nodded, noting something on his clipboard, "Can you tell me what led to this?"

Emma sighed, "I had some bad news," she shrugged.

"I see. And your living situation, I see you are living with your girlfriend, Regina?" he asked, eyebrows raised.

Emma nodded, "Yeah, that's right," she said nervously; why had Regina said she was her girlfriend and not her teacher to the ambulance workers. She supposed the woman must have been flustered.

"Do you think you will try this again when you are released?"

Emma almost rolled her eyes; as if she'd say yes if she was planning on it, "No," she shook her head, "I just want to go home. Sleep in my own bed. I hate hospitals."

"It says on your file that this is not the first time you have tried to take your own life," the doctor noted.

Emma blinked rapidly, "Well…no. But that was years ago."

"Yes, I can see that, and that was an overdose, I see?"

Emma nodded tiredly, "Yes. But really, I'm okay now, I just want to go home," she insisted.

The doctor nodded, "I know that. Now if you can just give me your psychiatrists contact information, we can try to either get her in to see you or make an appointment as soon as possible. Once that's done, we should be able to release you within a couple of hours."

Regina unlocked the door and placed her arm around Emma's shoulder as they entered the house.

"Can I get you anything, honey?" Regina asked.

"No, I'm okay," Emma claimed, "I just want to curl up on the couch, watch a movie or something."

Regina nodded, "Of course, sweetheart."

Emma collapsed onto the couch, her eyes heavy with exhaustion. Regina sat down beside her and Emma moved her head into the older woman's lap.

"Any requests?" Regina asked as she turned the television on.

"No, you choose, I'll fall asleep," Emma murmured, already letting her eyes close.

"Alright," Regina said quietly, playing with the remote with one hand and stroking her blonde with the other hand.

"I love you," Emma murmured sleepily.

Regina sighed with contentment at hearing those words from Emma for the first time since she'd found the girl in the bathroom, "I love you too, dear. We're going to fight this together. You are more resilient than anyone I know," she said gently, "My princess."