We can never understand

The pain of a broken heart

Because each heart is different

And each time a heart breaks

It shatters for a different reason

Or for a different person

So that each time

It causes different pain

Chapter twelve – Broken bonds and broken hearts

On those nights when you want nothing more than to just sink into the blissful oblivion of sleep, it avoids you, it cruelly abandons you. It leaves you all alone with those whirling thoughts that you so desperately want to escape.

Kagome tossed and turned again, feeling trapped in the desolate darkness of her bedroom. Her mind was in a chaos, each surfacing thought more upsetting than the last. She sighed and stared into the dark without really registering what she saw. Then she turned again and determinedly squeezed her eyes shut. She would sleep. Right now. Sleep.

For a moment her mind was as dark as her room in the night, but then an all too familiar scene started replaying.

He was standing before the doors when she finally caught up with him. He didn't talk to her, he barely even glanced at her. He treated her coldly and he seemed so distant that she felt hurt. He ordered a taxi and then opened the door and helped her in. He didn't wish her good night as the door shut.

She could not help herself and turned on her seat to look at the man as the taxi left. He grew smaller and smaller. He did not wave. He did not even look at her go. But neither did he walk away.

What had happened?

Why had it happened?

He had crossed the line. The fine line she had not even been aware of before. But now she knew with an unmistakable certainty, that the line had been crossed.

He had kissed her and they both knew where that path would lead.

Did he regret it? Was that why he had retreated back within his impenetrable walls all so sudden?

This Sesshoumaru scared her a bit. She had seen this side of him, but never had he behaved that way towards her.

What would happen now?

What would she do?

Did she want to walk down that path?

Kagome let out a surprised gasp when all of a sudden she felt a stab of pain. Or rather a stab of a ghost of a pain she had felt years ago.

Her father.

Her hand flew to feel her face in the dark, to trace the bruises that weren't there.

Another ghastly stab of pain.

Inuyasha.

She curled up under her sheets and let out a sob.

She had trusted Sesshoumaru until now, but could she hold on to that trust if she walked down that path?

Hadn't her trust been broken enough before? Hadn't she been in enough pain before? Hadn't her heart been broken enough before?

And the insistent, sickeningly hopeful little voice at the back of her mind that kept saying it all could be different this time around only made her feel more miserable.

She was finally happy. She had a great job. She had a son to raise. She was finally in the sun, after walking in the shadows for so long. She had struggled her way onto the surface and she was content there.

She didn't want to be pulled back down into the depths anymore. Not now. Not ever.

What did she feel for him anyway? She had trusted him, she had got along great with him, it had felt natural to be with him, they made a good team. She understood him – well as much one could ever understand another person. She had liked him. She had liked him very much. She had even felt attracted to him.

Could she possibly have been... in love?

That question did not vanish no matter how hard she tried to push it away. She did not know the answer to it, though she knew that if she kept studying herself long enough she would figure it out.

But truth to be told, she did not even want to know the answer to that question.

She was so very afraid.

Sighing to herself she turned once again to lie on her back, but the sleep still didn't come.

I have three options, she thought to herself. I can walk that path, I can go on like before and pretend the kiss never happened or... She paused, idly wondering why the memory of his behaviour hurt her so much.

Or I can be like him and take a step back.

She pinched the bridge of her nose and closed her eyes again. She really wished to just fall asleep.

When Monday morning came, Kagome's confusion was not as great as it had been on Friday night, but she still had no answers either. She had no clue how she should react around Sesshoumaru at work. Thus she reached the only logical conclusion: if the problem could not be solved, avoid it completely. With trying her best to ignore Sesshoumaru, she just might be able to circle around the problem completely. Kagome was not stupid enough to believe it to be easy to ignore Sesshoumaru, he was her assistant and they usually spent a lot of time together at work. But she was going to give it a try nonetheless.

Yes. That would be her plan. Kagome straightened her skirt, bit her lip nervously and then stepped into Kyoto Records. She walked through the lobby to the elevator and got in. When she reached the top floor, she stepped out and walked along the corridor. Sesshoumaru was already there, sitting behind his desk and he didn't even bother to look up as she entered the room.

So it was still the cold treatment, huh?

Not giving him another glance, Kagome walked past his desk.

"Morning, Hikaru-kun." She didn't bother to wait for his reply – she wasn't even sure if he would bother to reply, not with that new attitude of his. She entered her office and shut the door.

She completely missed his involuntary flinch.

Part of Sesshoumaru had felt a stab of pain. She had ignored him but what's worse, she had called him on his false name when there were no other people around. She had not called him so since she had learned his true identity. There was a small, very small part in him that felt bad about the way he had treated her, it really wasn't her fault. But there was nothing he could do about it. He could not afford having these kinds of feelings towards her, he could not afford letting her any closer. She already was too close. She already was too important. She had already made him weaker.

So he would push her away and put an end to it. And he should not feel hurt when she did the same thing to him.

In her office, Kagome sat down at her desk and sighed. She covered her face in her hands and started to lecture herself that she was doing the right thing by trying to avoid him – she really had no other options. And she should not be feeling betrayed by the cold treatment he was giving her. He was a friend and nothing more. She wanted nothing more of him.

Now if only she could truly convince herself to believe all of that.

They kept up the careful tiptoeing around each other. Sesshoumaru treated her like he treated all his other female colleagues – he kept his distance. Kagome again was clearly avoiding him, and at the times she was forced to interact with him, was friendly but much more reserved and polite than she had been around him before.

And the sudden change in the pair's behaviour towards each other did not go unnoticed. When the circus had gone on for 3 days, people started to talk. The new rumour now was that the two of them were no longer seeing each other. It was curious though, since no one knew what had happened and why the two of them had broken up. It took one more day 'til they were confronted about it – or at least, Kagome was.

On Friday morning, Sango burst through the doors into Kagome's office.

"All right, sister, spill it."

Kagome looked up from the papers she had been studying and gave Sango a puzzled look.

"And what is it that you want me to spill?"

Sango huffed.

"I want you to tell me what has happened."

"Nothing much has happened," Kagome replied, picking up the papers again to study them.

"Kagome. What happened between you and Hikaru-kun?"

"What?! Nothing! Nothing has happened between Hikaru-kun and me."

"Oh really now? Then why are you hiding your face in the papers as we speak?"

Kagome lowered the small stack of papers again and tried to fight away the lurking blush as she looked at Sango who was quirking a brow at her.

"Nothing happened," Kagome replied calmly.

"If nothing happened, why are you avoiding him all of a sudden?"

"I am not –"

"Yes you are and it's as clear as a day! You won't even be in the same room with him if you have a choice. And that's not the way you used to behave around him. Didn't you say you trusted him fully? Don't take me for a fool, Kagome, 'cause that's insulting."

Kagome sighed.

"I didn't mean to insult you."

Sango huffed and crossed her arms.

"Just tell me. What happened between the two of you?"

Kagome heaved a heavy sigh and buried her face in her hands. Her words were muffled and Sango had to struggle a bit to understand what she was saying.

"He kissed me."

"He kissed you?! But Kagome, that's great!"

Kagome's hands fell and she stared at Sango in disbelief.

"No it's not, it's awful!"

"How so, was he bad?" Sango was grinning.

"No, he was amazing, but – Argh! That's beside the point. I didn't want it to happen! He kissed me and that is bad. Get it?"

"No, I don't get it," Sango replied flatly. "Kagome. You have dated only one guy in your life and that was in high school. You need this to happen."

Kagome looked at her friend, silent, pleading.

"I did trust Hikaru-kun. I liked him very much. But now I just don't know, he crossed the line."

"He's still the same Hikaru-kun."

"Sango, you don't understand."

"Yes, I do. You're afraid of making commitments and starting a relationship because Inuyasha mistreated you."

"No, you don't understand. It's too risky. I've let Hikaru-kun close. Even closer than Inuyasha once was to me."

As she paused, silence filled the room for a moment or two.

"My trust has been broken twice before and my heart has been shattered in the process as well."

The look in Kagome's blue eyes sent chills down Sango's spine. All of a sudden she looked so vulnerable, so trapped, so pained... A lost, broken young child.

"And somehow I feel... That if it all were to happen to me again... if I were to fall now, once again, I wouldn't be able to get up anymore."

Sango circled around the desk and hugged her friend.

"Kagome. I know that you're in pain. I know that you're afraid. But will you be okay if you let this chance pass by? What if you'll come to regret it?"

"Love brings too much pain when it has been lost," Kagome whispered in a trembling voice. "I don't want to be hurt, ever again."

Sango closed her eyes briefly.

"Do as you wish, it's your life."

Stopping as she reached the door, Sango glanced over her shoulder.

"But personally, I think that even though love brings along a great deal of pain, it still is worth it all. It's the rule of balance. There will never be true happiness without pain."

She left the office and Kagome was alone again, with no means to escape her own mind and the haunting, painful memories.

It was on Monday afternoon when Inuyasha walked over to the table in a coffeehouse he frequented and sat down.

"Yo."

"Finally you bothered to arrive! We were waiting for you, you know," Sango scolded him.

"Better late than never," Miroku pointed out, trying to keep the two from fighting the first thing at the sight of each other.

"He's right," Inuyasha barked. "At least I showed up."

Sango huffed and crossed her arms. Then she looked at Inuyasha a bit closer.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah, what's up, Inuyasha? It looks like something's bothering you," Ayame joined in the conversation, leaning closer to Inuyasha and set her palm on his forehead.

"Nothing much," Inuyasha muttered, avoiding her gaze.

Miroku shook his head.

"I bet it's about a woman."

Both of them turned to look at him, Sango annoyed, Inuyasha surprised.

"What?" Miroku shrugged. "Don't you know that it's always about a woman? So, Inuyasha, is everything alright with you and Kikyo?"

"All's well. I think," he added.

Sango raised her brow.

"You think?"

"Well, we haven't really been seeing each other for quite a while," Inuyasha explained.

"I suppose it isn't easy dating a star," Miroku pondered out loud.

"Amen to that," Ayame muttered and sipped her drink.

"Where is Kouga, anyway," Sango inquired.

"Busy with work, for a change." Ayame rolled her eyes.

Inuyasha glanced at his phone and the gesture didn't go unnoticed by Miroku.

"What is it, Inuyasha?"

The young man was startled and quickly shoved the phone back to his pocket.

"I've been trying to call Kikyo all day long but I've never once got through."

"Isn't she doing the anime recording all this week," Ayame asked.

"Yeah. Over at the Grand Records."

"Well, she must be too busy to answer her phone then," Miroku stated. "Or then she's been asked to switch her phone off."

"Funny though, she did answer when I called her around the lunch time," Sango frowned.

"She might have been on a break back then," Ayame suggested.

"It'll be alright, Inuyasha," Miroku assured. "The recordings won't take forever."

Ayame wrapped her arm around Inuyasha's shoulders.

"Don't worry about it, honey," she said. "Kikyo must be missing you as much you miss her. Take it from me, when it gets unbearable, she will make time for you."

"Thanks guys."

"Oh, speaking of love trouble, have you heard about the new turn on the Kagome-Hikaru – front?"

All heads turned to look at Sango.

"Are they finally making progress," Inuyasha inquired.

"Not really," Sango sighed. "Well... He kissed her. At the night of the Gala."

"Way to go, Hikaru!" Miroku looked really proud.

"Don't get excited so soon," Sango warned him. "'cause the kiss freaked them out, it seems. They've been avoiding each other ever since."

"What?! Oh man," Inuyasha groaned. "How damn long it'll take for the two to realise that they've got it going for each other?"

"Maybe they're already starting to realise it and that's what's freaking them out," Ayame suggested.

"Well, I know what's holding back Kagome, and I can't really blame her for it," Sango sighed.

"They both have their own issues," Miroku agreed.

"Yeah, but this is the cure," Inuyasha insisted. "We might just have to sit them down and have a long talk."

"I'm not too sure if that would help." Sango shook her head.

"Wouldn't hurt either," Miroku said, seriously considering Inuyasha's idea. "But it would be better for them to sort it out themselves."

"Yeah, they seem to be doin' pretty good job at it," Inuyasha snorted.

"Compromise," Ayame said brightly. "Give Kagome and Hikaru, say, three weeks, and if they are still as hopeless then, we'll take the matter into our own hands."

"Ayame, I love you," Inuyasha declared and hugged the singer, smooching her cheek.

All four of them laughed.

"It's a deal then," Miroku agreed, grinning.

"Deal," Sango echoed.

"Cheers!"

Upon reaching a mutual agreement, four coffee cups met mid-air with a soft clang.

The door to his office opened, and the woman leaned against the frame of his door.

"It's done," she announced on her melodic voice. She ran a slender hand through her blond curls. "I tampered with her phone like you asked me to."

"Excellent, come in."

The woman stepped in and shut the door in her wake.

"Is it all proceeding as planned?"

"Yes. Renkotsu has just delivered me the pictures."

She clapped her hands, delighted.

"Will you send them tomorrow?"

"No," the man countered. "I think it is best for us to wait for a while and let the distance grow."

"You're so evil," the woman complimented him with a purr.

"So are you, my dear," he replied, caressing her cheek.

She closed her eyes for a second. When she opened them again, she found him staring at her.

"Have they already found Sesshoumaru?"

"No, they still haven't managed to locate him."

She bit her full red lower lip in frustration.

"Relax, darling. The boss has announced our third target." He handed over a picture cut out of a magazine.

An evil smile lit up her face as she grasped the picture.

"I think I will enjoy this one," she announced, and kissed the man lightly on the lips.

Later that Monday evening, Inuyasha was at home, having the usual family dinner, when his mother did something out of ordinary.

She touched the taboo-subject.

"It's been a few months now, hasn't it?"

"A few months since what," Katsuo inquired as he sipped his water.

"A few months since Sesshoumaru got out," the woman said calmly while pouring herself more sauce.

Katsuo's chopsticks met the surface of the table so hard that they snapped in two.

"Do not mention that name in my presence," he hissed while turning to glare at his wife.

She did not relent under the flames of his burning golden eyes and answered his glare with a calm defiance.

"How long do you think you can stay mad at him? A part of you is already regretting that you threw him out of the family."

"You're wrong," Katsuo insisted, trying in vain to calm himself down.

"No, I'm not and you know it. Katsuo, I'm worried. It's been months and there has not been a word from him."

"And that is good! That proves that he knows his place. That he knows he cannot return here."

"How do you think he can survive out there? He has nothing but the clothes on him!"

"I doubt it. Most probably by now he has conned himself enough money to support himself."

"That is not Sesshoumaru. You know him."

"Do I? I thought I knew him, before that lawsuit!" Katsuo bellowed.

"Do not be ridiculous," Izayoi shrieked, very close to lose her temper too.

Inuyasha watched the two, frozen. He had never seen his parents get into a fight quite like this.

"I am not being ridiculous," Katsuo countered with his booming voice.

Izayoi shot up from her seat.

"Aren't you worried at all? He is your son."

"He is no son of mine," Katsuo snapped, his tone furious.

For a moment she just stood there, gasping for air, her eyes wide and her face pale. Then she suddenly turned around and stormed off.

The two men watched her go. And then the younger one got up as well.

"Nice one, dad," he muttered, cutting his father with his words. Then he ran after her mother.

Inuyasha caught up with her in the hallway.

"Mom, are you okay," he asked, concerned.

"I'm fine, Inuyasha," she answered, trying in vain to hide her tears from her son as she tried to quickly wipe the corners of her eyes dry.

"No, you're not," he insisted and took her hands tightly in his. "Mom, what is it?"

"I'm just so worried about him," she breathed out, looking into Inuyasha's eyes like she would be trying to find something there. "I know it's silly, but I've always thought of him as my own son. I've always thought that I'm more of a mother to him than his real mother ever was. What kind of a mother would want to hire a nurse to look after her baby and then later on just abandon him?"

Inuyasha looked at her, stripped of all words.

"I know he would not see it like that, he has always only thought of me as his father's replacement for his mother. But Sesshoumaru is like that. It always was hard for him to show affection – and to even accept it.

"Mom. Don't worry about Sesshoumaru, okay? You know him. He's fine, I swear. A guy like Sesshoumaru will always struggle back up to his feet no matter how high or how hard he would fall. Don't cry."

"Oh, Inuyasha," Izayoi breathed out as she hugged her son tight. "I just hope your father would come to his senses and realise what kind of a mistake it was to disown him."

"One day he will, mom. We'll just have to stay strong until then."

"Uncle Yasha," the girl shrieked cheerfully and hurried over.

Inuyasha's eyes widened as he saw how grimy her hands and the corners of her mouth were. He winced, as the girl hugged his legs fiercely, rubbing the mess onto his new jeans in the process and staining the denim. He sighed to himself. Rin was very young and thus very able to make a mess without meaning to. He just had to bear the stains like a man.

"Rin, you are not allowed to leave the table until you have finished," called Sesshoumaru's authoritative voice from the kitchen.

"Oopsie," the girl mumbled, unlatched herself from Inuyasha and ran back to the kitchen.

Inuyasha shook off his jacket and slipped out of his shoes. He stepped in.

They were having dinner, and as usual, the area around Rin's bowl of rice was very messy.

"Hello, Inuyasha," his second cousin greeted while he was getting up. Miroku had just finished and collected Sesshoumaru's empty bowl and took it to the sink. Sesshoumaru had been the first to finish, but he waited at the table as long as Rin was eating.

Miroku guided Inuyasha to the living room.

"You guys are still getting along?" Inuyasha asked.

"Sure. Your brother makes a rather fine roommate. Sure he hogs the bathroom, but he's quiet and clean and keeps mostly to himself."

"And Rin," Inuyasha grinned.

"She sure knows how to make a mess, especially while eating, but she's too adorable to be angry at."

"Can't argue with that," Inuyasha chuckled. "I mean, that kid has managed to do the impossible: melt Sesshoumaru's heart of ice."

"I heard that," came Sesshoumaru's dry voice from the kitchen. A moment later he appeared in the doorway. "What are you doing here anyway, Inuyasha," he inquired, quirking his brow.

"I needed to get away from the warzone," Inuyasha sighed. "Things are really tense at home again."

"What did dad do this time," Sesshoumaru asked somewhat resigned.

"Actually it was mom who started it this time."

Both Sesshoumaru and Miroku turned to give Inuyasha disbelieving stares.

"Mom brought you up while we were eating dinner and dad went berserk."

"She did what?" Sesshoumaru frowned in his surprise.

"I was really surprised of it too," Inuyasha admitted. His eyes were grave as he locked them with his brother's amber ones. "She told me that she's worried about you. That she's always thought of you as her own son. She has not forgiven father for disowning you."

Sesshoumaru was taken aback of this information. Sure Izayoi had always been kind to him, but he would have never guessed that her affection for him ran that deep.

Inuyasha noticed the slightly helpless glimmer in Sesshoumaru's eyes.

"It's alright," he assured. "I told mom that you're probably doing just fine. There's nothing we can do about it, until Dad comes around."

"You could meet up with her, if you wanted," Miroku suggested.

"No," Sesshoumaru replied after a moment of consideration. "It is best for me not to reveal my true identity to any more people. The less people know, less likely it is for my cover to be blown."

Miroku nodded in understanding.

Inuyasha, however, was frowning.

"How long do you plan to live like this?"

"Like what," Sesshoumaru said, quirking his brow.

"Behind a mask."

Sesshoumaru regarded his younger brother in silence and then averted his gaze.

"As long as it is needed," he replied.

Simple and plain. There was no other way for him to live. Not as long as the lies and false accusations were tainting his name.

"Kikyo-san? Are you alright?"

"Huh? I'm just fine," the woman lamely replied.

Her manager frowned and crossed his arms.

"I am not buying that, Kikyo-san. You've seemed down for days now."

The black-haired woman sighed and turned to look at her manager.

"I'm just fine. Don't worry about me."

The manager shook his head.

"Maybe after we have finished the recording for this anime, we should arrange a little break for you. That would be good, wouldn't it? You've been working hard for months now. It would be alright to take a little break after being so busy for so long."

Kikyo sighed again and leaned back in her chair.

"I already told you, don't worry about me", she muttered.

"Actually, I do need to worry about you. It's my job. I'm your manager after all." the man smiled tenderly at her. "It's decided then, holiday it is. I'll go to make a few calls to arrange a week off for you."

"Thanks."

Kikyo watched him walk away, lost in her thoughts. It was true. She had been working hard. She had been too busy to have even a lunch date with Inuyasha, and after work she had always been so exhausted that she had just collapsed onto her bed. Sure, she had seen Inuyasha a week back at the Kyoto Records' Gala, but that had been such a gathering that it had been impossible for the two of them to really catch up and have such a alone time she wanted to spend with him.

What disturbed her most though was that there was no single phone call for him, not since the day the currently on-going recording had started. She really did miss him. Maybe this coming week off was a good idea after all. She would finally get to have a long-awaited date with Inuyasha.

"Yuuki Kikyo-san?"

Kikyo startled and lost her train of thought. She turned to look at the nervous-looking assistant who was standing before her.

"Yes?"

"Uhm, this was addressed to you."

The assistant handed over a brown envelope, on which it read "To Yuuki Kikyo-san".

"I see. Thank you." Kikyo took the envelope and gave the assistant a brief smile. The assistant bowed and walked away. Once the assistant was out of sight, Kikyo opened the envelope.

With a cry she dropped the envelope and its contents as if they had burned her hand. A trembling hand rose to cover her mouth as she slowly got on her trembling feet. For a moment she just stood there, desperately gulping for air as if she were suffocating.

"Kikyo-san?"

Her widened eyes met the concerned dark orbs of her manager.

The man frowned. Were those tears in the corner of her eyes…?

With a strangled cry, the woman turned and ran.

"Kikyo-san!"

The man had already taken few steps to pursue her, when he stopped as he spotted something lying on the floor.

It was a brown envelope, addressed to Kikyo, on top of which there lay three photographs. Each photo had the same subject – a man and a woman who appeared to be in a coffee-shop of some kind. In the first photo the man and the woman were looking at each other, smiling. In the second one she had her arm wrapped around his shoulder. In the last one he was hugging her and giving her a peck on the cheek.

The man in the pictures was none other than Inuyasha, the woman was a beautiful red-head – Kyoto Records' singer Ayame-hime.

The manager muttered a curse and tossed the photographs away, rushing after his charge.

The pictures were published in a tabloid magazine that came out the following day. Kikyo had showed up at the Grand Records for the recording, as usual, but had locked herself into the bathroom after she had seen those pictures sneering at her from the front page of a magazine a recording assistant was reading.

Her manager was trying to get her to come out in vain.

"Kikyo-san, I know it's hard, but there are only three days left of this recording. We have a schedule here we need to keep. Try to keep your head held up high for few more days and then you'll get your week off. I can even arrange more of a vacation for you if you wish."

No response.

"Inuyasha-san does not strike as a star-chaser to me. And doesn't Ayame-hime date her manager? There is most probably a perfectly good explanation for those pictures."

"The photos seem to be rather clear to me," Kikyo shrieked back from behind the locked door. Her voice was bordering on hysteria. "There's nothing that needs to be explained!"

"Kikyo-san…"

"You truly don't seem to grasp the heart of a woman, do you, manager-san?"

The man startled and turned around to see an elegantly dressed and well-groomed woman who had long wavy golden hair. There was a smile gracing her full lips that were carefully painted red. He noticed that the smile did not quite reach her eyes.

"Why don't you go to grab a cup of coffee and let me handle this? I really think that Kikyo-san needs to talk this matter over with a woman."

Her voice was rich and he realised that she must be one of the singers on Grand Records' list. Something in her attitude made him wary of her, but there really was no reason for him to decline her offer of help.

He nodded and left.

The woman's smile deepened, then she knocked the bathroom door.

"Kikyo-san? I am your colleague. I am a singer of Grand Records. I'm called Sara-hime, you may have heard of me. May I come in? Unless of course, you're willing to come out."

After a moment of silence, the lock clicked softly.

Sara opened the door and stepped in.

"I know it's painful," she began, "but star-chasers are one of the downsides of this career. We can't always know for sure from the start whether the person we feel fond of is one or not. It has happened to almost anyone of us. There's nothing to be ashamed of."

"So you think there isn't any explanation to this? That it isn't just a misunderstanding?" Kikyo asked, sounding somewhat desperate.

"Honey," Sara said, her wicked eyes gleaming. "You said it yourself, didn't you? The photos speak for themselves. There's nothing that needs to be explained."

At that moment, Kikyo's cell phone went off. She dug the phone out of her purse and glanced at the screen.

"Oh, so now he finally calls." her voice was bitter. "I don't want to talk to him. Not now."

"Do you want me to handle it, hun," Sara asked.

Kikyo nodded, mutely.

Sara took Kikyo's phone and answered.

"Kikyo, finally! About the pictures that just were published – "

To Inuyasha's surprise, he heard an unknown rich feminine voice.

"This is Sara on Kikyo's phone speaking. Kikyo does not want to talk to you, not now, not ever. She says that the photos that were published speak for themselves, and that there is nothing you would need to explain. So stop calling her. She doesn't want to see your face ever again."

Dumbstruck, Inuyasha was left to listen to the unkind dialling tone after the unknown woman had hung up on him.

"How did it go?" Ayame asked anxiously, nervously glancing at Kouga who was sitting right next to her, scowling furiously at the tabloid magazine.

"A woman I don't know picked up. She told me that Kikyo doesn't want to talk to me, and that the photos tell it all. She said that Kikyo doesn't want to see my face ever again and then hung up on me."

Ayame heaved a sigh in her desperation.

"But that can't be! It's all a huge misunderstanding! You have to explain it all to her!"

For some reason, Inuyasha was now getting angry.

"Why should I, if she thinks all's clear and does not need an explanation. Why should I bother, if she's ready to assume the worst of me, judging by few photographs alone?"

"Inuyasha…"

"Screw it! If this is how much she trusts me, there's no reason for me to try to explain it to her. It's over."

Kouga finally raised his gaze from the offensive magazine and locked his eyes with Inuyasha's.

"Inuyasha…"

The young man scowled and got up.

"I'm outta here."

Ayame and Kouga helplessly watched the young man march off.

"This is quite a mess indeed," Kouga replied after a moment of silence.

"I'm sorry," Ayame apologised. "I didn't think anything like this would happen. After all, it was just having coffee between friends, Miroku and Sango were there too."

"I know, but this magazine tells a whole different story. I'm going now to make some calls and try to clear your reputation a bit."

"Thank you," Ayame whispered, fighting against the tears threatening to spill. She felt responsible for the whole mess. Ayame hugged herself tightly, feeling utterly miserable.

"I hope you understand."

"I understand very well," Sango assured. "But that still messes up the schedule completely."

"I know that and I offer my apologies. But this is important to her for now."

"I can imagine," Sango agreed, eying at the manager. "None of us wanted this to happen. This is why I hate tabloids so much."

"Iwajima-san, do you think it's a misunderstanding?"

Sango heaved a sigh before making an eye contact with the manager.

"Actually, I know it to be a misunderstanding. You see, Inuyasha and Ayame were not alone when those pictures were taken, I was present also."

"I knew Inuyasha-san couldn't be a star-chaser!"

"There's nothing we can do about it, though. Kikyo-san is too too blinded by her hurt and anger to accept it to be a misunderstanding. Inuyasha again is too stubborn and feels too insulted to try to explain it to her."

The man nodded, his expression was gloom.

"Anyway, how is Kikyo-san doing?"

"Unstable," the manager replied. "You know the pain of a broken heart. She has lost her appetite, and has trouble sleeping. Even though she might appear normal, her silence and the lack of smile give out the sadness she feels. She also tears up at times, without any apparent reason. It's hard for her, which is why I really wish you can change the schedule."

"I understand. She may have two weeks. Will that be enough?"

"That is very kind of you."

The man got up and bowed. Sango bowed her head in response.

"Goodbye, Iwajima-san. And thank you."

"You're welcome. Take care, and please take care of Kikyo-san, also."

"I will."

The man left the office, and Sango sighed as she leant back in her chair.

It had become quite a mess indeed.

The man sat in the very same top floor reception room, where Kyoto Record's CEO's assistant was working. He was sitting in the armchair, feeling very much comfortable. There was no real reason for him to be here at the recording company today, but he had found that he liked it there. It was much preferable to sitting back at the hotel getting bored or restlessly roaming about the foreign city. Besides, he was rather interested in all that seemed to be going on with the CEO and her stoic assistant.

Mister Geoff Thornwell was no fool. In fact, he was very perceptive a person. He was good at judging people's characters and very able to read the subtle changes. Silently he examined from his seat the interaction between Kyoto Records' CEO and her assistant. There had been a similar occurrence one week earlier, too, when the woman had asked her assistants to take a few copies of a document she handed over to him. Back then her eyes had been shining when she had been looking at him; there had been a radiant smile on her lips. He had watched her with a glint of tenderness in his eyes, unconsciously answering to her smile with a slight tweak of his lips. After handing over the document she had stayed to exchange a few witty words with him. She had departed stifling a merry laugh, and his unreadable eyes had followed her retreating form keenly.

Now the exchange was drastically different. She walked over to his table. She asked him to take a few copies, and although Thornwell's Japanese skills were still at a beginner's level, he could tell that the words she used were much politer and more carefully selected than from a week ago. She didn't hand the document over, rather tossed it onto his desk. Her eyes never met his, and she turned to leave without waiting for his reply. His movements were stiff when he reached to pick up the document from the table. He didn't allow his eyes to watch her go.

It hadn't been a long time since the CEO had told Thornwell how she trusted her assistant over her vice president. And judging by the fact that Hikaru had been her date to the Gala and the way his and her eyes lit up whenever they were stealing glances at each other when they thought that no one was looking, Thornwell had already begun to suspect that they might even be more than just good friends. Though, the American CEO wasn't sure if the couple knew how deep their affections lay.

For sure, something must have happened though, for the two to now behave towards each other in a way so completely different from before. Thornwell frowned. Far at the other end of the corridor, the elevator binged softly. Heels were clicking against the tiled floor and soon Iwajima Sango emerged into the room, glancing at the CEO's assistant from the corner of her eye as she walked straight to Kagome, who was leaning against the closed door of her office, browsing through some documents. The women talked for a while with low voices, then the PR-consultant turned to leave. Thornwell got up from his chair.

He caught the woman right in front of the elevator.

"Miss Iwajima."

Sango flinched and turned around. Her English wasn't that good, which was why she had been avoiding the foreign CEO the best she could.

"Yes, how can I help you?"

"I was wondering if you knew what is going on with Miss Higurashi and her assistant," the man asked her to the PR-consultant's great surprise. She just stared at the man for a while, not knowing how to reply. She noticed his sharp eyes and realised that the man had very strong intuition to the complex feelings going on between the two.

She took a deep breath.

"They finally made some progress on the Gala night. They kissed and that made them both suddenly feel afraid. They both have their own problems. It is not easy for them."

Thornwell nodded gravely.

"I understand. Thank you for telling this to me, Miss Iwajima. I'm sorry for keeping you from your work."

Sango bowed her head politely and then stepped into an elevator.

Thornwell stood there, carefully memorising the information he had got from the PR-consultant. For now, he would just sit back and watch.

"I'm getting booored~," the man with painted lips whined, absentmindedly caressing the blade of his sword. "When will we get some action going on?"

"Soon," the leader with braided hair barked, turning to glare at the impatient man. "The next target has already been announced."

"Is it Sesshoumaru," the impatient man asked enthusiastically. "He is such a hottie."

"Sorry to disappoint you, your gayness. This time we're after a chick," a man with a shaved head calmly replied, tossing a photo cut out of a newspaper onto the table.

A short, toadlike man with bulging eyes took the photo and looked at it.

"My, my… May I take care of this one?"

"As long as you stick to the plan, do as you please," the man with the braided hair said, exchanging glances with the man with the shaved head.

Inuyasha downed the drink and slammed the glass onto the wooden table. Miroku and Sesshoumaru exchanged a long, concerned glance. It was not unusual for Inuyasha to be unreasonable when it came to alcohol, but neither of them had ever seen him drinking this recklessly.

"Inuyasha, maybe you should slow down a bit. We haven't been here even for an hour and you already have –"

"Shuddup, Miroku. I'm an adult man, I can hold my liquor, thank you very much."

Miroku didn't say anything, but Sesshoumaru noticed the hurt expression that momentarily flickered on the man's face. An adult man, he said. Sesshoumaru huffed to himself. An adult man, maybe, but one that still acted like a brat. Rash and temperamental, that was the kind of an 'adult man' Inuyasha was.

Inuyasha was glumly staring at the table. His grip on the now empty glass was so tight that his knuckles were almost white. Ever since the phone call he had been feeling this intense anger, the pain of a bond of trust broken. He had but grown angrier and angrier, without any way to let it all out.

So when Friday evening came, he wanted to go out to drink. He had called his brother to accompany him. He had agreed. Miroku had tagged along since he had nothing planned for the evening.

Miroku sipped his drink. He wanted to help his cousin out, but could not think of a way to cheer up the young man. Grimly he admitted to himself that nothing he would do or say would reach Inuyasha and make his pain go away. The pain of a broken heart was a heavy burden to carry. It could only be defeated by time and by one's own will. Sometimes the will was not strong enough. The pain of a broken heart could crush a person for good. Some people would never recover from it. They would continue living in pain.

But those who were able to survive the pain, to defeat it in the end, always found that they had grown stronger from before.

Miroku nodded to himself quietly. A broken heart could become a blessing, as crooked as it sounded. It could be a valuable lesson of life. And young Inuyasha, who still was rather immature at times, could do with such a lesson.

It still was a pity, though. Miroku did not wish to see his cousin suffer. From the bottom of his heart he hoped Inuyasha to defeat the pain one day. It would not be easy and it would take some time… but Miroku believed his cousin would be able to do it.

Inuyasha ordered another drink.

Miroku frowned, concerned. This was not a good way of dealing with pain. Inuyasha was being too reckless. And yet he knew the young man would not listen to him. Helplessly he glanced at Sesshoumaru.

The dark-haired man shook his head slightly. It still was too early for Inuyasha to open up. Until then, they could just try their best to keep him out of the trouble. There was no use in wasting their breath advising him when he was still refusing to listen. Sesshoumaru sipped his drink while he watched Inuyasha gulp down his own drink. Miroku started a conversation. He was left to do most of the talking though, since Sesshoumaru was, as always, a man of few words. Inuyasha again kept glumly glaring at the table and downing his drinks. He did not say a single word. Miroku was really worried. Inuyasha was being more reckless than ever and it concerned Miroku. He wondered what was going in the hurt man's mind. He was so unpredictable in his current state of mind.

Inuyasha slammed the empty glass onto the table and was about to order another drink when Sesshoumaru set his hand on his brother's shoulder.

"I believe that's enough for now," the man said coldly.

Inuyasha was about to protest furiously, but the icy glare of his brother sent chill down his back and extinguished the flames. Inuyasha glowered back and flicked Sesshoumaru's hand away.

"Keh, whatever! I was just about to go to men's room anyway."

Inuyasha got up and stomped away.

"Was that wise," Miroku asked.

"Do not worry. Even in this reckless state he is in, Inuyasha knows better than to lash it out on me."

"I hope you are right," Miroku muttered.

Inuyasha glared at the man from the corner of his eye. He seemed like the type to be easily aggravated.

"What're ya lookin' at," the man barked out at Inuyasha.

"Nuthin'. I can look at whatever I feel like, asshole."

"What did you call me?" the man's eyes narrowed.

"Trouble hearing, dumbass? I called you a fucking dick."

After that the fight was inevitable. Inuyasha had been looking for trouble and trouble was what he found.

The man let out an infuriated growl and launched at Inuyasha. Inuyasha took a bold step forward and punched the guy in the face, hard.

Over to their table Miroku and Sesshoumaru heard the loud yells from the men's room, soon followed by a loud crash. With a bad feeling they both got up quickly, but didn't even have time to take a step when they saw a burly bouncer walking out a struggling Inuyasha who also was cursing loudly.

So much for keeping Inuyasha from out of trouble. The two men silently followed and saw the bouncer crudely tossing Inuyasha to the ground before turning around and walking back to the club.

Inuyasha sat there for a while. Miroku noted that he had a fresh bruise on his cheek. Inuyasha got up and started to walk away.

"Inuyasha!"

The young man stopped in his tracks, but he didn't turn around.

"Keep away," he growled.

Sesshoumaru saw how his brother's nails were digging into his palms as he was clenching his fists. He was trembling all over.

Silently Sesshoumaru walked over to his brother. He stopped when he reached his side. After one glance he looked back to Miroku and gestured him to come over.

Miroku followed, although keeping his guard. When he reached Inuyasha, he almost gasped.

He was crying.

Sesshoumaru wrapped his arm around his younger brother's shoulder.

"Let's take you home."

Inuyasha's sobs were so hard that each one shook his body. At times he had to stop to take a desperate gulp of breath as if he was drowning. He had enough tears for the whole walk home.

Later he was lying on a mattress and covered with a blanket. He had calmed down in his sleep, but there still was a tear glistening on his cheek.

In the darkness of the room, Sesshoumaru was unable to sleep. His brother's pain had opened his eyes to the pain he was carrying himself. He was not sure if he ever had felt like this before, even in his grim days of imprisonment. An aching pain that did not fade, a numbing stab of loss.

Once again he tried to reason that he was doing the right thing. The woman was a weakness. Allowing her close would crumble the wall he had built up to protect himself. Only the ones with heart of stone could survive in this cruel world.

But when the darkness was oppressing him, when the gloomy chilling shadows in the corners seemed to be reaching for him, it was too hard to believe in his own logic and justifications.

If what he was doing was right, why did it hurt so much?

The reason why Sesshoumaru was so overwhelmed by his pain was because he had never before experienced anything like that. He had not really trusted anyone in his life so far but himself. Not even Hiten. The man was a valuable comrade and he had respect for him. Sesshoumaru felt even gratitude towards him. But he wasn't stupid enough to trust Hiten, the man was a thief after all.

But the odd but nonetheless charming CEO had wormed her way through his walls. She had gained his respect. She had gained what no one before her ever had. She had gained his trust.

And due to one moment of lack of self-control he had lost that trust.

The bond had been shattered.

It definitely was one of the cruellest feelings in the world; the pain of a trust lost.

Chie: There~ This came a bit sooner than the last chapter, huh? I also suppose it wasn't quite what you were expecting after all that fluff and even a KISS.

In any case, this chapter was quite an accomplishment to me. It may just well be the least SessKag centric chapter I have ever written. I understand if that annoys you, I mean, we all just want to see the two get together, don't we? However, I surprised myself positively that I actually can write about others too, not always just about Kags, or Sess or the duo together.

Now, if you have stones prepared, go ahead and start throwing. –grins and spreads her arms- See how I've grown up from the good ol' FM-days. I'm not hiding behind Dah-chan's back anymore. ;3