All characters are property of J.K. Rowling.
I want to thank everyone for being so patient with me, and giving me time to write this chapter. Now without further delay…here is the next chapter.
A Special Message
Hermione was up stairs in her room. After the little scene that she had down in the kitchen, Sirius had carried her back up there. The whole time telling her that everything was going to be okay. That she shouldn't worry about anything. He was only trying to make her feel better, but what he didn't know was that he was only making her feel worse. And he was pissing her off. She didn't mean to do it, but there are just some things that you just can't help. And this just happened to be one of this moments.
Hermione just got so mad at Sirius, that she really didn't know what she was doing? It was like someone else was controlling what she was saying and doing.
"What do you mean that everything is going to be okay, Sirius? Don't you understand what is going on? It's bad enough that I can't go out anywhere in fear that He's going to capture me or something. But now I can't even go to sleep at night because now he is able to get a hold of me through my dreams." Hermione started to yell at Sirius.
Sirius didn't know what to say or do. He knew that Hermione was hurting inside; and that she was scared because she didn't know what to do. But it still hurt. It was like she was telling him that he was stupid, because he was saying everything was going to be okay. And that she shouldn't worry about anything. He just didn't know what to do anymore.
She didn't know why she did it. She knew that she shouldn't have. What had made her want to tell Remus and Sirius? All she wanted was for all of this to stop. She wanted everything to be back to normal. But what was normal? And why did she blow up like that towards Sirius?
Hermione remained in her room for the next two days, only coming out when she thought that everyone was asleep. It wasn't until the third day Hermione didn't come out of her room did Remus start to get suspicious about what she was doing.
Remus waited until Hermione left her room that night to go to the kitchen to sneak into her room. Once inside he started to look for anything that might tell him what she was up to. But sadly there was nothing. So he turned to leave. But just as he was about to step out of the door, he saw it. There hidden under her desk. It stepped forward to get a better look when he noticed what it was….
It was a Bible. But by the looks of it, it hadn't been opened in a long time. He picked it up and noticed a bookmark sticking out of one of the pages. So he opened it to see what she was reading. And on the page there was one thing highlighted…..
'Deliver me from the practicers of what is hurtful, and blood-guilty men save me.'
Psalms 59:2
Remus didn't know what to do. So he did the only thing that came to mind…..he put the Bible back and left the room. Think of things he could do to help ease the pain Hermione was feeling.
Down stairs Hermione was sitting in the kitchen eating a bowl of soup. Just thinking about everything that had been happening to her. First she loses her parents, then everything with Snape, then the thing with Sirius, and now she didn't even know if she should tell Harry and Ron what was going on.
Everything was just so confusing.
Hermione put her head down on the table and just started to think back on to everything that her mother use to tell her about when she was younger. Her mother was always turning to her Bible when something went wrong. She told Hermione that when things in life got to the point were it feels like that you can't go on and no one can help you; just turn to the Lord and that he will always be there for her.
Sadly Hermione took after her father's side of the family and wasn't really that religious. But now that she was thinking about how things were going, she decided that any little thing could help. So she closed her eyes and began to pray like her mom showed her how when she was five.
Dear God,
I know your probably wondering why know I'm talking to you when I haven't since I was five. But my mother use to always tell me that when things got tuff that you would be there for me no matter what I've done. I'm just hopping that she is right. For you see, I don't think things can get any worse then they are now. I'm so scared that he's going to find me. I thought I was safe, but now he can find me in my dreams. I don't know how much more I can take. It feels like the harder I try to fight him off, the stronger he gets. And I'm scared that he is going to start hurting those that I love. And in a way, I think he is already doing that. He has me so scared that those around me are going to get hurt that I'm pushing them away and in return they are getting hurt still. Only not by him but by me. Please God, if you can here me, please give me a sign that everything is going to be okay and please give me the strength to carry on . Please God; I will do anything if you would just help me this once. Because I can't do it by myself anymore.
Through Jesus' name
Amen
Halfway through her prayer, Hermione started to cry. She truly was scared about what was to come. She hated the fact that she didn't know what was going to happen next. And just by sitting there thinking about what she didn't know she began to cry even harder. And slowly she began to cry herself to sleep right there at the kitchen table.
Unbeknown to Hermione, Remus was standing outside of the kitchen door and he heard her whole conversation to God. But instead of going in to see if she was alright, he decide that the best thing to do was to give her, her own space. So he went back up stairs to get a better look at that Bible Hermione had in her room.
When he got up back to Hermione's room, he saw Sirius pacing around holding the bible; with a look of concern on his face. When he saw Remus just standing there, he burst into a round of questions.
"Moony, where is Hermione? Is she okay? I don't know what to do anymore, I can't protect her if she doesn't let me."
"Pads, calm down. For starters, Hermione is okay. She is actually downstairs in the kitchen asleep."
"She's asleep in the kitchen and you just left her there, what were you thinking?"
"I was thinking that I wanted to get a better look at this," Remus said plunking the bible out of Sirius's hand, " and maybe find something that will help Hermione deal with the things I over heard her saying in the kitchen."
"What was she saying?"
"It's not my place to tell you. She doesn't even know that I overheard her."
Remus spent the night reading the book until he finally found something that he thought would help Hermione. Surprisingly it wasn't part of the book. It was in fact a letter left by Hermione's mom for her in the back of the book.
So very quietly Remus went back down to the kitchen and left both the letter and the bible on the table in front of Hermione; so she would see them when she first woke up.
When Hermione woke up the next morning she was surprised to see her mom's bible on the table in front of her. She didn't remember taking it downstairs with her. Also she didn't remember ever touching her mom's bible since her parents had died. So how did it get down here. Then she saw it. There along with the bible was a letter addressed from to her; in her mother's handwriting. Slowly she opened the letter and began to read it……
My Dearest Daughter,
If you are reading this, then I am sorry. For I am no longer with you. But always remember that I have died because it was my time to go. And even if I didn't go in old age, remember that God wont let someone die if it wasn't their time to go yet. Don't be sad because I am gone; because death is nothing to fear. Because death is not the end, but it is only the beginning.
Hermione, I know that things are going to happen that you will not be able to control. And I know that it's going to scare you. But the only way to get through it is to trust those close to you to give you that little push you will need in the morning to get you started, and to trust in God to give you the strength to make it through the day without turning back.
Now honey, there isn't that much more that I can tell you. But I can leave you with two scriptures to help you to conquer your fears; and they are Psalms 118:6 and 1Peter 3:13-15, just look them up and everything will be better. I know you are wondering why I'm telling you to look them up instead of just of just telling you what they say, but by you looking them up by yourself it will give you time to really think about everything that has been happening to you. And also it will let you see other things that are in the bible and you will see that there is something in there for every little thing that can go wrong in your life and help you get through it.
Now go and look up those scriptures and always know that I love you. And even in death, that wont change.
Love,
Mom
Hermione just set there. She didn't know what to do. There were several things running through her head. Like….who put her mom' s bible on the table and where did they find this letter. And when did her mom write this letter.
After just sitting there for a couple of minutes, Hermione reached over and started to look up the scriptures her mom had left her.
'God is on my side; I shall not fear. What can earthling man do to me?'
Psalms 118:6
'Indeed, who is the man that will harm YOU if YOU become zealous for what is good? But even if
YOU should suffer for the sake of righteousness,
YOU are happy. However, he object of their fear do not
YOU fear, neither become agitated. But sanctify the Christ as
Lord in YOUR hearts always ready to make a defense before everyone that demands of
YOU a reason for the hope in YOU but doing so together with a mild temper and deep respect.'
1 Peter 3: 13-15
Hermione sat there just thinking about what her mom's letter said and about the two scriptures left there for her. It didn't take her that long to realize what her mom was trying to tell her. Her mom was telling her that she shouldn't fear anything that comes because no matter what happens, because there will always be someone there with her pushing forward through the fog. As long as she stood strong in what she believed in.
And for the first time in many days Hermione did something she thought she would never do ever again…..she smiled.
A/N: Okay guys, so I hope you liked this chapter. And I'm sorry it took me forever to update, but I had to do a lot of research to do this chapter. Most of it involving me sitting down and asking my mom what she would tell me to help me through my hard times. And lets just say that once my mom started talking, she didn't want to stop. NEWAYS tell me what you think about this chapter; also I have a question for all of you: should I keep Hermione in this time or should I go ahead and do like I was planning and send her into the past….I'm leaving the decision to you guys. Also the first scripture in the story wasn't highlighted by Hermione…I will reveal who did later on.
Mari