Elizabeth and J.V. talked for hours it seemed like, while Reba and Helen were off in the kitchen making an early dinner. Reba would have loved happier conversation, but Helen insisted on talking about all the bad things that were happening.
"…but I've finally gotten him to where he won't work in the barn as much. He stays in his recliner most of the time, thank goodness. He needs to rest his heart."
Reba nodded as the two peeled potatoes.
"I think he'll be okay, though," She said, perhaps trying to convince herself.
Helen shook her head. "He's getting worse everyday. Plus his lungs aren't as healthy as they used to be. He's been around dust all his life, and it's finally getting to him. You can't breathe all that stuff in and not expect consequences."
"Mama, how about we try and stay positive?"
"I try to be, you know that. It's just difficult. I'm trying to prepare myself in case he does go."
"Mama!"
"I'm sorry." She set her paring knife down on the counter and picked up a dish towel, wringing it in her hands. "It's your grandma coming out in me. She never was an optimist."
"Well, I am, and I refuse to think that Daddy's dying."
"But he is, honey. I've been trying to accept it, and you have to, too. And so does Elizabeth. Part of me wishes she hadn't gotten so close to him in the past two hours."
"But she did. I needed her to. Brock and I have been telling her the story of how we met, and she's taken to it. It's her favorite thing to do, listen to us. She felt like she already knew Daddy. I had to let her come with me to meet him."
Helen nodded slowly, beginning to peel the potatoes once more. "Speaking of Brock, why didn't he tag along? Work?"
Reba sighed, figuring she'd have to tell everyone sooner or later. Her mother might not be the most positive of people, but Reba trusted her with her life. She'd keep it to herself until Reba told her otherwise.
"Brock and I are over."
Helen looked up, eyes wide behind her glasses. Reba nodded. "Yeah, we're getting a divorce…I guess."
"When did this happen?"
"We had a horrid fight this morning-"
"You just decided this morning? And you still came here? Honey, why?"
"I had to get out. And it wasn't a spur of the moment thing, either. I've been thinking about it."
"Well, what's so bad that you think you have to divorce?"
"It doesn't matter, really."
"Reba."
"…we both cheated. It had been going on for a while on both ends. He found out about me five days ago when I was in the hospital, and-"
"You were in the hospital? Why am I just now getting word of this?"
"Yes, I was in the hospital. I was in a three-car accident. And I didn't want to worry you, Mama. You have Daddy and the ranch to take care of. I'm a big girl. I can handle this just fine."
She put her head down and focused on peeling her potato just so.
"Reba, you know this is crazy, right?"
Reba shrugged. "We can't handle the fighting. We beat each other down, and intentional or not, it happens."
"You've been with him for twenty-eight years. I just knew you two would be the rare ones that'd make it."
"Yeah, well, we thought that, too."
Helen put her knife and potato down, hands on her hips. "I can't let you do this. You're gonna get the papers drawn up, signed, then regret it a month later, if not sooner. I can't watch you go through that."
"I'll be fine, Mama. I'm a big girl."
"So you've said. But even big girls can get hurt, and I know you're hurt. But please, please don't rush into this. Maybe you could just separate again. Get a little time apart."
"We tried that," Reba told her, getting frustrated. "All that did was cause me to go into depression, and him to think he could actually live without me. It made more problems if anything else. Besides, if we didn't divorce, he'd only cheat again. Once a cheater, always a cheater."
"Does that go for you, too?"
"I'd never cheat again. But it doesn't matter because we're over."
"Reba, you can't do that. You can't pin something on him when you're not him. Who's to say he wouldn't cheat? Who's to say you two still can't work it out?"
"Mama, it's over, okay? Nothing more can be done. We've tried it all. It just wasn't meant to be, so whatever. It was time well wasted."
Helen went back to peeling. She thought a moment before sighing. "Reba, I'm going to say this and only this: twenty-eight years ago when you two were so madly in love and running off together after your chores and sneaking out your bedroom window with sheets tied together - yeah, I knew about that - and kissing on the front porch 'til we flicked the porch lights on and off, I had many long talks with your daddy. You know what I told him?" Reba shook her head. "I told him, 'they're going to have so many knock-down, drag-out fights because they're worlds apart. They're nothing alike. They don't understand each other, and it'll always be a struggle.' And it has been, hasn't it?" Reba nodded and Helen went on. "But you learned to understand each other as the years passed. You know that he didn't mean to hurt you by cheating. I don't know the specifics, but we both know that it meant nothing to him. That's the kind of man he is. With his silly way of thinking, he probably thought it meant something, but it didn't. And your affair meant nothing, either, right?"
Reba didn't respond. She kept her head down as her bottom lip quivered.
"Reba, what aren't you telling me?"
"I got pregnant."
"By the man you were cheating with?"
Reba nodded. "And I lost her."
Helen began crying instantly and wrapped her arms around Reba.
"You can cry, honey. It doesn't make you any less strong."
That's when Reba started intensely sobbing. Brock had said something similar to that months ago. She hugged her mama tight as Helen spoke through the tears.
"This was just a roadblock. Don't give it up just yet. You'll regret it. I swear you will. You love Brock, and I know you don't need him, but you love him. And whether or not you want to admit it, you'd feel lost without him. You're one of the rare women who don't need a man to be happy, but there'd always be something missing. I saw how you two loved all those years ago. You were meant to be together. Till death do us part. Does that mean anything to you?"
"We've hurt each other too bad, Mama."
"No. Trust me. You haven't." She pulled away and brushed Reba's hair out of her eyes, wiping a few tears away. "Listen to your mama. Don't make this decision. It's not the right one."
Reba's mind was going a mile a minute. She wanted to believe her mama because she was right, but there was too much hurt. She wondered if she could forgive and forget. Or had everything blown up too big?
After Reba had managed to get away from her mother, she escaped outside. It was dusk and the sun was setting behind dark clouds. The view was something she hadn't seen in years, and it made her miss simpler times. Why couldn't it be twenty-eight years ago when all her and Brock knew how to do was love each other? Why did things have to change? Why did she have to grow up?
She felt a drop of rain on her nose and sighed. She looked up and saw those angry looking clouds, threatening a downpour, and decided to make a run for the barn. She couldn't go back inside. Not just yet.
The barn was dimly lit, just as she remembered. She walked along the halls, peeking in the stalls. She counted two horses, none of which she recognized. She knew that her horse had died of old age, and her daddy had sold some others. Slowly but surely, the ranch was dying right along with Daddy.
Going to Baby's old stall, Reba fought back fond memories. She didn't necessarily want to remember good times between her and Brock. They'd make her cry, and she figured she had cried enough for that day.
But when she closed her eyes, she was taken back to 1979.
xXx
July 1979
Reba spent several hours in the barn just admiring all the horses. She'd be leaving in a few short weeks, and she wanted to remember this place she called home. She was nervous about how she would tell her parents about her and Brock's plans. She wondered how they would react, and if they'd be angry at her. She hoped with all her heart they would understand and let her go. She'd be eighteen in December, and it was time for her to grow up and start living her own life. There was an amazing man in her future, and she hated to say it, but even if her mama and daddy didn't want her to go, she would anyway.
"I'm gonna miss you, Baby," She told her horse, petting its nose. The horse nodded its head a few times and Reba smiled. She hoped it wasn't the last summer here. She hoped to visit every summer until she died. And she wanted to be buried here, at home.
"Reba?"
She turned around, and there, in the doorway, was Brock. His jeans were dusty and his hair was an absolute mess, looked like he hadn't showered in a week, but she jumped into his arms anyway.
"I'm disgusting," He told her, laughing and hugging her tight.
"I don't care." She looked up at him and gave him a kiss. "What brings you here? I've missed you."
"I missed you, too. And I have a very important reason for being here."
"And what would that be?"
He grinned widely and got down on one knee, pulling his aunt's ring out of his pocket. "I know I've already asked you to come to Houston with me, but I didn't make it official. So, will you marry me and make me the happiest man in Oklahoma?"
Reba held her hands over her mouth, eyes wide. "Did you ask Daddy?"
"I did."
"Then yes!"
He stood up and slid the ring on her finger before hugging her tight.
"I promise you, I'll give you everything you ever dreamed of."
She smiled, pulling him as close as she could. "You already have."
xXx
February 2007
"Still looks the same in here."
Reba jumped and whirled around to see Brock standing in the door of the barn. Her heart did this weird fluttering thing as he spoke again. "Remember when I proposed to you in here? It was right over there, by that stall."
"Brock, what are you doing here?"
"Getting you back."
"I thought I told you I was done."
He shrugged and walked towards her, hands in his pockets. Reba almost melted. He walked like that all the time twenty-eight years ago.
"I thought you were, too."
There was an awkward silence. Cold air whipped around them, but somehow Reba stayed warm despite only having a light jacket on her arms. Brock wore nothing.
"But I realized you didn't really mean that," He continued.
Reba scoffed, wrapping her arms around herself. "Shows how much you know. I was dead serious. Never been more serious in my life."
"No, you weren't. You didn't mean that, or anything you said this morning, for that matter. I didn't either. Plus you said 'was dead serious.' Past-tense. Reba, please stop being so stubborn. I know I've messed up-"
"Yeah, you have."
"-and so have you. We've hurt each other in ways I never thought we could. But through it all, I never stopped loving you."
"This has nothing to do with that! I wish everyone would stop focusing on love! It takes more than love to make a marriage work!"
"I know, but that's the foundation, Reba, and you know what? Our foundation hasn't crumbled. It hasn't swayed or buckled or even cracked. It's still there, Reba. All we have to do is go up. Build up. Why can't we do that? Why is that so hard?"
"'Cause we keep hurting each other!"
"We always will! Don't you see? That's what marriage is about! Yeah, we hurt each other, but we always stick together. It's called being a team."
"Being a team involves being there for me! You don't do that!"
"Yes, I do. I'm always there for you!"
"No, you're not! You push me away!"
"No, Reba. You don't come to me! You stopped coming to me a long time ago. What am I supposed to do? Ask if you're okay every five minutes? You have to tell me when you need me."
"You should already know!"
"No. That's part of our problem. You assume I know everything, but I don't."
"Of course I assume that! You used to know everything. You used to automatically figure out I was feeling upset, and then you'd fix it."
"We've grown."
"Yeah, apart."
"No, not apart. Stop talking as if things can never be fixed. Stay positive. You always used to tell me that. Years ago when this whole thing started, and we separated. You were the one doing what I'm doing now. You forced me to believe we'd be okay, and now, I'm doing the same. And I'll tell you, I never knew how stubborn I was. This side of the door isn't easy."
She thought a moment before asking, "What about the cheating?"
Brock hung his head, nodding. "Yeah. That was wrong."
"More than wrong."
"Hey, you did it, too."
Reba sighed. "We both did."
"Exactly. And I'll be sorry for the rest of my life. It was a ridiculous mistake, and it was selfish. I should have gone to you and told you how I felt instead of rushing to someone else."
"I…should have done the same…"
"Yes! See what happens when we let our guards down and stop being the most stubborn asses in the world? Things get fixed. This is what the acts of forgiveness and love can do! It mends broken hearts, Reba. I've had my heart broken, and so have you. But they can mend."
"All the way?"
"All the way."
She let the tears she had been holding back fall.
"Brock, I just can't get hurt again. It's happened too many times."
"I can't guarantee you won't get hurt. But I can promise you I'll never mean to hurt you."
She nodded. He was right. The things they said and did to the other meant nothing. They acted out of anger the majority of the time.
"We gotta go back to being the beautiful southern belle and crazy dentist guy. That's all we know. That's what we do." He reached into his shirt pocket and pulled out her rings, kneeling before her. "Reba, I have screwed things up again and again and again, and I don't deserve your love. Maybe I've taken it for granted. No, I know I have. And I'm sorry. I'll always be sorry, but I can't live without you. Your daddy told me that you can live without me. I believe him. You don't need me, and I'm fine with that. That's who you are, and I love who you are. But I can't live without you. I simply can't. So, please, please take these rings so we can start to fix things." He held them out to her and she put out her left hand. He smiled and slipped them on her ring finger, standing and taking her in his arms.
"I love you, Brock. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry."
"Hey, it's okay. It's over. We're gonna fix things, okay?"
He looked into her eyes and reached up to wipe away the tears that were rolling down her face.
"I'm so glad you came here."
He smiled and began the ending lines of the song they had kept in their hearts for years. "And if you should ever find it in your heart to forgive me…"
"…come back, darlin', I'll be waitin' for you."
"Kiss! Kiss!"
They looked over and saw Elizabeth standing in the doorway of the barn holding J.V.'s hand. They were both bundled up in their winter coats, smiling wide, and Elizabeth wore a pair of boots ten times too big.
"Well," Brock said. "I'd love to."
"Don't make me have to go flick the porch lights," J.V. said as they two shared their first kiss in the newest chapter of their life. They were going to mend everything. They finally opened their eyes and saw the wonders that the acts of forgiveness and love could do.
The End
Wow! Is this really the end? It seems like I just started posting! Thank you so much for all the reviews and the kind words. They mean a lot. I know I said I was going to do a songfic next, but I've decided to do another chapter story, as I'm itching to get an idea I've had for awhile typed out. Hope that'll be alright. I might have chapter one on that posted as soon as tonight, but if not, tomorrow. Again, thank you so much for the reviews! ((: