Hello again guys, now this is my attempt at a light comedy chapter before i dive into the more serious stuff and the actual battle so comment and like it and if you want more chapters like it then tell me and i'll do my best so lets do this
I do not own Kancolle
I was awoken to the sound of a air raid alarm being blared in my ear. "Gaaaahhhh!" I cried as I grasped my ears and rolled off the bed to the floor.
"Rise and shine Montana!" Eugen said happily as she blared the alarm in my ear again.
"What the hell was that for!?" I yelled as I checked to make sure my ears weren't bleeding.
"Well it's morning and I didn't know how to wake you up so I grabbed the nearest thing and…" Eugen said rubbing her hands behind her back.
"And you thought it would be a good idea to blare it in my ear." I said a little grumpily.
"Yep and now you're up!" She said happily as she headed to the door.
Groaning I sat up and looked out the window at the dark grey clouds and the heavy rain that pelted the district. "Seems, I'm not doing anything outside today." I said as I stood up and got undressed and headed for the shower.
I wrapped a towel around me as I opened the door, only to find Bismarck standing there naked dripping wet from the shower. We stared at each other in shock for what seemed like hours before Bismarck's face grew bright red as she grabbed a towel and picked up the heaviest thing in the bathroom (which was a large cabinet) and threw it at my face. "Get out!" She yelled embarrassed as the cabinet slammed into my face and sent me flying backwards, as she slammed the door.
Eugen came running in, "What happened!?" She asked as she saw me on the floor.
Still dazed, I got up, but I didn't go up with my towel around me, and Eugen's face grew bright red. "We-well, that's something," she stammered before she fainted.
Now snapping out of my daze, I realized what was going on. "Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit." I said as I threw on a robe, and grabbed my clothes and towel and ran out of the room. "I have gotta get out of here!" I thought to myself frantically as I ran to the repair baths.
When I reached my destination, I sighed in relieve to see that it was empty. "Thank goodness." I sighed as I hung up my robe and stepped into the water. "Ahhhh, this feels so good, there's nothing that can ruin a nice bath like this after I left that chaos in the room." I smiled blissfully as I sank into the water so only my hair eyes and nose were above the waterline.
And not a moment too soon, I heard the doors to the bath open and a group of girls entered the changing area.
"Oh no," I thought to myself as I frantically tried to come up with a solution but i didn't have any time left, as the girls were walking into the bath area.
I took a deep breath and dove under the water and headed to the far side of the main bath. 'I hope I can hold my breath for long." I silently prayed and also thanked the steam and bubbles for their blockage as I felt the girls step into the bath and if I probably saw any of them I would probably get a massive nosebleed.
From my spot under the water, I could hear muffled voices of the other girls in the water above. "By the sound of their voices, I think it's Iowa, Yamato, and Nagato. Oh Nagato will kill me if she finds out I'm here." I thought fearfully.
I felt the water around me stir and I saw a murky figure standing only a few inches to my right. My face grew bright red as I slowly moved away from the figure, but as I did so I felt myself push up against something soft. "What the hell?" I thought as I reached out my hand and squeezed it.
I heard a squeal of surprise from above as I let go of what I was holding and felt blood begin to drip from my nose. "Oh shit." I thought regrettingly as a kick sent me flying across the bath and into the other wall causing me to pop above the surface.
As the water cleared from my eyes I saw Nagato clutching herself with her face bright red. "You pervert!" she yelled as she plopped herself deeper into the water to hide herself.
I saw Iowa's face turn bright red as she laughed to the point she was out of breath. "What are you doing in here?" Yamato asked in an amused but kindly tone.
"Um, um I was, I was…" I stammered as my face grew red.
"So Montana you planning on taking a bath with us?" Iowa asked as she moved next to me and I felt her breasts push up against my arm.
"Umm no sorry," I said as my nose began bleeding again as I grabbed the nearest towel and wrapped it around me and ran out of the baths grabbing my clothes and hastily got dressed.
"Where you going Montana?" Iowa called in a cute way from the baths.
"Sorry!" I called as I ran out of the baths.
I ran until I reached the cafeteria, and by that time I was out of breath. "Is there any way that this day could get any worse!?" I yelled aloud to no one in particular.
I sighed and sat down at one of the tables just as Akagi walked into the cafeteria. She spotted me and headed over to where I sat. "Hey Montana," she said as she sat down.
"Oh hey Akagi." I said as she sat down, "What brings you here?"
"Well it's around lunch time so I came down here for lunch." Akagi said as she stood up and headed over to a buffet table that had just appeared from nowhere.
"Oh, well now that you mention it, I am quite hungry. Now lets see what they have here that I may like." I said as I headed over to the buffet table.
Just as I reached the table, I heard a loud clunk behind me. I looked behind me a little confused and saw that Akagi was already eating from the buffet table, but instead of having a simple plate, she had taken the entire tub full of food.
"You are going to eat all of that!?" I said in shock.
"Yep and it is quite good the food here so help yourself to the food." Akagi said with a mouth full of food.
I sighed and looked back at the buffet table and was about to get a plate, when I saw Akagi get up and walk back over to the food. Looking back my eyes widened in shock as I looked at her then the tub as she had eaten the entire thing. "You ate that entire tub!?" I said as she picked up another tub and headed back to the table.
"Yep." She said happily as she sat down and began to gorge her face full of food.
At that time I had no appetite left so I walked out of the cafeteria a bit annoyed now. "Is there any way this day could get any worse?" I grumbled to myself, and not a moment too soon fate had to come prove me wrong.
As I was grumbling to myself, I walked along only to suddenly stop as my leg had brushed up and pulled something along the hallways length. "What the…?" I said as I heard a click, and all of a sudden I was blinded by a bright green liquid that came pouring from nowhere.
"Did you get it?' A timid voice asked.
"Don't worry we got him." I heard Kongous voice say enthusiastically.
"What is the meaning of this?" I said in a very annoyed tone.
"Eeep!" I heard the voice say.
"Oh it's Monty." Kongou said in surprise
I flicked some of the green goo of of my hands and wiped my eyes so that I could see what was going on. Kongou was standing in front of me with a sheepish smile on her face while another girl cowered behind her. "We-we're sorry." the other girl said as she hid behind Kongou.
I sighed "Do you mind explaining what is going on here?" I asked Kongou.
"Well we are here to catch a ghost!" Kongou said proudly.
"A ghost. Why?"
"Well Inazumy here said that she thought she saw something unusual and told me and I devised a trap to capture it." Kongou said now turning sheepish.
"With this green goo, you thought you could catch a ghost." I said with a doubtful expression on my face, "Fine. continue your ghost hunt, but please don't lay traps like that again." I said turning and walking the other direction to the baths.
"You got it boss!" Kongou said as she headed off with the other girl in the opposite direction.
I grumpily trudged back to the baths with the green goo leaving a trail behind me. "Let's hope that there is no one in the bath area this time for I can't deal with anymore bad luck today." I said as I got undressed and tossed my dirty clothes into a hamper that took them to a washroom somewhere.
I walked into the bath and sat down heaving a heavy sigh as I let the water rise up to my shoulders. "Why am I having so much misfortune today" I sighed as I closed my eyes.
"Seems you're having a rough day." Someone said to my left.
I sat up quickly and looked around, and saw Zuikaku sitting in one of the repair dock baths. "What happened to you?" I asked looking at her timer which still had 10 hours left till completion.
"Took a bomb hit in a small skirmish the other day cause I didn't have the support from carrier fleet one." She said bitterly.
"Oh sorry." I said.
"So besides that, why are you here?" She asked leaning forward in the bath.
"Well Kongou and another girl were on a expedition to catch this ghost and they had set a tripwire and I got green goo dumped on me." I said as I sank into the water until it reached my neck. "Oh and you're not bothered that I'm in here?"
"No, why would I be we're in the same fleet now." She got a bit of a devilish glare in her eyes. "But I overheard from some of the other girls that came through here, that you've had some trouble with the girls this morning."
"Oh… ummmm..." I said as I sank lower into the water, my face growing red as I went under until my nose was above the water.
"So mind telling me what all that it was about?" She asked slyly.
I blew some bubbles in the water before slowly sitting back up. "Well it was sort of a misunderstanding, both times. But I didn't mean to do anything wrong!"
"I heard that you got slammed in the forehead with a heavy cabinet from Bismarck." She said with a laugh as my face grew red again. "And also that it seemed you had the balls to actually squeeze Nagato's breast."
"That was an accident as well!" I said now completely embarrassed.
"I'm only teasing you." She said leaning back.
"Don't do that! I feel extremely guilty now, but I don't want to face them, especially Bismarck." I said sinking back into the water.
"So what are you going to do now?" the carrier asked sinking lower into the bath.
"I don't know. Probably finish up in here and then take a nap and hope this day passes by." I sighed.
"That will not do." I heard a stern voice behind me.
I gulped as I turned around, as Zeppelin and Tirpitz walked into the baths with towels wrapped around them. I felt my nose begin to bleed, but i quickly turned away and wiped it as both of the girls got in the water next to me. "We need to discuss our strategy for the coming battle tomorrow," Zeppelin said as she sank into the water.
Tirpitz gave me an amused smile before turning away. They sat only a few inches from me causing my nose to bleed more, so I quickly moved to the other side of the bath to prevent them from seeing it. "Umm I'll tell that to you guys later when everyone can be there as well." I said.
"Well we need to know it in order for-" She stopped as Bismarck walked into the bath area.
"The Admiral wants to see you." She said going a little red before quickly walking out.
"Now what." I grumbled as I grabbed my towel and quickly dried off before grabbing my clean clothes from the hamper.
I quickly walked to the Admiral's room and was about to open the door, when it flung open and smacked me in the face causing me to fall onto my back. "Owwww!" I groaned.
" Duìbùqǐ!" A sweet voice said helping me up.
I opened an eye and saw a girl with dark skin and her blue hair was tied into a bun. Rubbing my forehead, I walked into the Admiral's room where the Admiral stood with a serious looking silver haired girl in a dark blue overcoat with brass buttons going down the side. "It seems you've already met Ping." The Admiral said motioning to the girl behind me.
Ping extended her hand out, "I am the Chinese heavy cruiser Ping Hai, it's nice to meet you and join your fleet sir." I shook her hand as she walked over to the silver haired girl and stood next to her.
"So that's why she's wearing that red dress," I said to myself, "And who's the other girl?" I asked.
"Privet, my name is battleship Soyuez." she said in a Russian accent.
"These two arrived only a few minutes ago and, I called you down so that you could meet them and discuss your battle plans." The Admiral said with a smile, "Now why don't you meet them at the cafeteria, because all of them are waiting for you."
I saluted the Admiral, before turning and walking out followed by Ping and Soyuz. We walked to the cafeteria, where all the other fleet girls were milling around. Some were talking, others were watching Yamato and Akagi eat a massive bowl of food with Bismarck drinking from a barrel of beer. No one noticed me at all. "Is this how it is in this naval district?" Ping asked a little concerned.
"Well not all the time." I said gritting my teeth a little.
"This place has no discipline whatsoever." Soyuz said with a hmph.
I cleared my throat, which got the attention of Fubuki, who was standing there watching Kongou. As soon as Fubuki saw me, her face got wide with shock and she quickly and awkwardly stood and saluted me. And like a group of dominoes, they each noticed me and quickly stood up and saluted me with a little bit of awkwardness. "Your comrades seem odd," Soyuz stated as she moved next to me.
I cleared my throat, "These two girls here have just joined our fleet, their names are Ping Hai and Soyuz."
The other girls in the room nodded in greeting. "Now lets begin with-" I was cut off as a pie slammed into my face. The room went dead quiet.
"Alright, who did that?" I demanded as I wiped the pie from my eyes.
The crowd parted revealing Iowa sheepishly standing next to a homemade catapult. " Hey Montana… how are you doin?" She asked.
I gave her a look before sighing and using my hand to wipe away the remains of the pie. "Now...after all that let's begin. We have a plan to formulate."
Well now the plan is formulating and will be revealed in the next chapter now lets see how Montana does as commander of this fleet. And I will see you all in the next chapter
(And lets push the favorites and followers of this story to 50 cause its very slowly growing and it means a lot to m that you guys like the story!)
P.S: The characters of Tirpitz, Ping, and Soyuz are some of my final OC characters. Now Tirpitz was the sister ship of Bismarck so shes going to be almost exactly like Bismarck. Ping is the pride of the Chinese navy as a heavy cruiser and wears a traditional red chinese dress. Soyuz is a Russian battleship with a very serious attitude on the outside but on the inside is rather playful.