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Chapter 7 Hyper Realism

Sunstreaker drove alongside the beach, the warm breeze blowing into the cab. In excitement Felicity took off her seatbelt and stuck her head out the window smiling as the wind brushed her hair back and whipped across her face. She adjusted her sunglasses looking back to Sunstreaker's holoform that was focused on driving.

He had insisted that they would take the long route into town, for whatever reason. Felicity wasn't complaining. The way the salty breeze blew into the cab was amazing. She was in no rush to get to town. She hadn't realized how relaxing it was to be a passenger within a beautiful vehicle such as Sunstreaker.

She tilted her head and questioned why he was smiling. She lowered her gaze down to the floor but then looked back out the window.

"Please. Smile again." He spoke softly.

She whipped her head around giving him that same questioning look, raising her aviators to her forehead.

He had one hand on the steering wheel and his other draped outside the window so casually. He continued to look ahead of himself a soft and relaxed expression on his face now.

Felicity tilted her head and started to smile again realized he was purposely taking a turn quite fast. She rested her sunglasses in place and stuck her head out the window again this time allowing herself to see Sunny in her peripheral vision.

And for a moment she was too busy looking up to the seagulls flying overhead, the rocks below and, the surf of the ocean meeting land. Sunstreaker looked over at her. The soft smile remained seeing her so happy, so free and at ease. Content rested in his spark for the moment as they simply drove in silence. Nothing needed to be said between them.

Sunstreaker simply enjoyed her joy as his own and enjoyed the pleasant relaxing drive. He took another turn causing Felicity to grip the side of the door and laugh out. She peeled her hair out of her face and looked back into the cab.

He did so again and this time Felicity squealed in hysteric laughter. "Sunny!'

A chuckle came from his throat. Another turn was taken fast and tight as they drove higher into the hills. Felicity yelled out as she lurched into the cab and hit Sunny's side with a rough 'oof'.

He easily steadied himself out and looked down at her in concern. He realized her eyes were clenched shut and her mouth was spread into a smile as she laughed. She blew her bangs out of her face and peered up to him through crooked sunglasses with that same Primus damn smile.

And he loved it.

"Go any faster around those turns and you'll have to catch me!" She chided.

He shrugged. "Maybe." The Lamborghini's engine growled and roared as they went higher into the mountains. Another excited squeal echoed into the hills.

Sunstreaker pulled up alongside the sidewalk and cut his engine looking over to a befuddled and frazzled Felicity. She was pressed into the seat by the seat belt tightly against her. She was holding her chest laughing. "That was amazing!" She giggled looking over to him taking off of her sunglasses.

He smirked reaching over to straighten out her messy hair. She leaned into the touch, her smile bright and childish. "I'm glad you enjoyed my driving."

"Enjoyed?" She echoed as Sunstreaker pulled away her seat belt. She got out of the Lamborghini pushing up the door. She noted that he opened it for her. "I think it was panic induced. Sort of like a roller coaster enjoyment."

Sunstreaker stepped out of the driver's seat smoothly and gracefully. He pulled the door down and looked over to Felicity already popping his trunk. "Junk in the trunk." She mumbled with a snort. "Remember that?"

He glared at her but it was only a pout. She waved at him dismissively. "Help me out." She said waving him over.

He complied with a sigh walking next to her and grabbing the bagful of supplies while she grabbed the sketchpads. She closed the trunk and was already making her way into the café.

And upon doing so Sunny wasn't surprised to see many of the employees greeting her with a friendly hello and waves. She smiled back and humbly waved to them. "I hope breakfast is still hot." She smiled kindly to them.

They replied with an affirmative as she made her way to a secluded table in the corner of the café where they wouldn't be disturbed or noticed all that much. "The usual?" A middle aged woman said walking by with an empty tray.

"Absolutely." She nodded.

"And him?" She said making her way behind the counter already getting her breakfast fixed.

She looked up to Sunny and smiled. "He already had his breakfast." She giggled walking to the table.

Sunstreaker noticed and raised his eyebrow in question at this. She was already setting up her supplies and the sketchbooks. Sunstreaker sat down hesitantly and looked around. The café was just as he remembered it with a few new renovations and a paintjob. The walls now glowed a murky light brown. The new wooden floor shined in the late morning light through cleaned windows.

Before she could select a subject or place graphite upon paper, the same waitress from behind the counter placed a meat-lovers egg sandwich in front of her and a cup of steaming coffee. Felicity's eyes sparkled upon the work of edible art before her. "Perfect as always, Anne."

She smiled at and then to Sunny. She placed her hands on her hips her golden and white streaked curls coming undone from her bun. "I remember you." She cocked her hip. "It's hard to forget a handsome face like yours." And then she walked away.

Felicity looked up to him as she was taking a sip of her coffee. "An old friend, Anne. He's visiting again." She immediately placed the cup down almost spitting out her coffee as she spoke. The older woman left the holoform blushing and pouting.

Sunstreaker looked at her with the same expression and frowned raising an eyebrow. "Something funny?"

"Nothing. Nothing at all." She took the sandwich in her hands and took a bite of it. She smiled upon the taste as she chewed.

Sunstreaker's expression became softer as he watched her. He always enjoyed seeing her take care of herself. Three years ago, in those times when she was looking over him, she hadn't done so. Her weight had lessened and her appearance paled. Seeing that she had sustained her husky and plump self through the years made him happy. She was still true to herself.

Felicity looked up slowly. "Is there something on my face? What?" She took a napkin and wiped her mouth.

Sunstreaker smiled, shaking his head. "Nothing. Nothing at all." He looked down at the blank piece of paper and twirled the charcoal in his hand.

"You haven't drawn in a while have you?" She suddenly said. He looked up to her and swallowed hard before hesitantly nodding his head.

"N.E.S.T. has you working like a slave?" She whispered.

He looked around the café watching other humans go on about their business. A low murmur of voices, an occasional laugh, the clatter of old ceramic plates being washed, and the gurgling of coffee being brewed was enough distraction from other roaming ears. He looked back at her and shrugged. "Patrols. False alarms. Sometimes and sometimes not. Sometimes in the middle of the night. I haven't been getting enough recharge lately."

"I'm sorry."

He shrugged one shoulder dismissively.

Felicity took another bite of her sandwich. She flicked her eyes down to his arm seeing it finally move. She smiled but hid it before he could see. She chewed before speaking again. "What are you drawing?"

"Value graphs. Getting used to the charcoal. I like how you can blend it." He curtly spoke.

The woman continued to watch him until he was looking up and down to his paper. A small victory. She looked over to a lone old woman eating her eggs and sipping at her coffee. Felicity bit her lip before taking the first dive.

"You never told me much about Sideswipe…" She whispered.

He didn't pause. He didn't stop. He continued on as if he never heard her. His hair fell over his shoulder as he tilted his head taking a different angle of his work. She narrowed her eyes. Maybe he didn't hear her.

"You-."

"I heard you." He mumbled gently. He flicked his fingers across the paper. "You're curious. I understand that." This time he stopped and looked up at her, piercing blue eyes digging deep into hers. She paused upon the intensity of them. Had she struck a nerve and he was just trying to hide it just to be kind to her?

"Yes, back at the garage. This morning. The bond. I saw bits and pieces. Over the years…I see things. Dreams." She never broke away from his intense gaze. It was dangerous. Gorgeous. Untamed and mysterious. He looked back down at his sketch. "How did I know this was the reason why we came here?" He said with an exasperated tone.

She narrowed her eyes. "It's not. I'm sorry. I didn't know it would be…be…like this. It just came out." She said. She suddenly didn't want the rest of her sandwich.

Sunstreaker sighed. "I want to know more about your parents. The other night. It worried me. Just like my dreams have been disturbing and worrying you." He was now smiling. "Deal?"

Felicity deflated upon his request. Fine. A secret for a secret. That would work. "We will be here for a long time."

"We have all day." He replied curtly, flipping the page and revealing the sketch he was working on. She looked down at the old woman and saw how beautiful and perfect it was. Even all this time without drawing he would always have his talent.

"She's beautiful."

"I know." He replied.

Felicity rolled her eyes, pushed the sandwich away, and crossed her arms on the table looking at him. He was so humble.

She knew he felt her gaze upon him because a smirk was growing on his lips. "You first."

She sighed looking away. "My parents, huh?"

"Correct. I want to know why they think of you as a failure when in fact you are the happiest and most successful offspring any human can have."

Felicity's cheeks reddened upon the compliment. Her stomach did flip flops. "Yeah well, they don't see it that way. I think they're jealous."

"Pathetic."

"I don't know."

"You don't know?" He echoed looking up at Anne behind the counter frosting pastries with careful and steady hands.

"They weren't my parents. I called them. They sounded different. You can tell when someone smokes just by their voice. Her voice wasn't soft anymore. You can tell the damage done by drugs in his voice. The sound of the TV in the background. The sound of bottles being dropped and tipped over. I could just imagine what it smells like. They weren't my parents. They had been corrupted. They get a free ride now. Why would they ever want to work again?" She wrapped her arms around herself wanting to rock back and forth to ease the sting in her eyes. How could she be betrayed like this again?

"Being abandoned by them again...dropped..." She whispered so unsure and quiet. "I don't know if I can still save them, Sunstreaker."

His voice was a growl. "Don't. They do not deserve your help. They don't want anything to do with you so why should you have anything to do with them?"

"I know but-."

"Blood does not force you to be tied to family nor have an obligation towards them, Felicity. They do not deserve you. Only those that return selflessness and love deserve it."

Felicity smiled sadly. "Like you?"

Sunstreaker didn't stop drawing or falter. "Yes."

She didn't want to talk about her parents all that much suddenly. It was a trigger. It made her hands sweaty. It made her body itchy and crawl. An anxiety attack. Her foot started to tap and her mind started to become frantic. "You don't have to talk about Sideswipe because…"

And Sunstreaker knew the warning signs before she even did. And he knew exactly how to ease them.

"Eat."

She shook her head. "Not hungry."

"Then draw."

She looked down at her paper with heavy eyes. She picked up her pencil and looked around and then in front of herself. The holoform so beautiful in every way possible. All his flaws were perfection. He was perfection.

Sunstreaker knew how to ease his student. And it was by distractions. If it being himself then so be it.

She began to draw and she hated and loved how he stood more still than usual because he knew she would draw him upon his order to draw. She knew how she worked and she knew how he could stop her from losing it with a simple command. Such power over her made her nervous. But Sunny would never abuse it. Never.

"Sideswipe was younger. He was the one who split from my spark."

Felicity didn't stop his words so soft and calm. So deep and rumbling in the same tone. His expression was soft. "Our creators, parents as you would say, were only expecting me. But they had to quickly make a frame for my brother. They raised us well. They gifted us with our blades. Made from the rarest metals and alloys. My creator forged them and my femme creator inscribed them with ancient Cybertronian."

Felicity stopped drawing lost within his calm story.

"What have you seen Felicity?"

"Seen?"

"The dreams."

Felicity shook her head. "Dark rooms…I think you…I don't know. I don't see as much as I feel. The bond is so hard to find it's like plucking a hair out of water. So it's hard to see. It's murky and strange. But I feel pain. I feel excitement. Regret. Disgust. Hate. Love. So much love." She looked up to him.

"Sideswipe was everything to me. I vowed to be his protector. I vowed to sustain his weaker spark. I vowed that we were to never separate from each other. I loved him-still do. So very much."

Sunstreaker stopped suddenly. "Maybe I am telling too much right now."

"No, please go on. I want to know more of you Sunstreaker. I want to know why you are having these dreams. I want to know why fate brought us together yet again. Don't you?"

Sunstreaker looked up to her. There was too much to his story. He was only giving her such a diluted and edited version. If he were to tell the whole truth, every detail… "I do not want to speak here."

Felicity locked her eyes upon him. He was too bare right now. To open to too many people. He was overwhelmed. She wanted to know more but the walls were already going up whether she liked it or not. "It's okay. That's fine. You told more than enough. I just was curious and sometimes that gets me in trouble with you." He didn't say 'no' to her persuasion to continue though.

Sunstreaker exhaled a gentle snort of laughter through his nose. "You shouldn't feel like that. I don't mean to. Too much war. So much mistrust and mistakes. I can't make them again. I am careful with what I say because I was forged. I was forced to be this way because of war. Because of…my own wars." Because of his own demons. The monster inside him. No, not inside him. The monster he was.

And that is when Sunstreaker's mind became dark. The boxes he closed and stored in the back of his mind. The charcoal in his hand stopped moving and stopped scratching across paper. The feel of his brothers' pain as he charged to save him. The way his optics pleaded for him to save him and then give up.

The charcoal snapped in his hand and Felicity reached over placing a hand on his. "Sunny?"

He hadn't realized she had been calling his name. What was a mere moment was minutes. There was worry in her eyes.

"Sorry. The holoform froze up. Something glitched I think." He blinked rapidly.

Felicity looked down at the charcoal in his hand tiny pieces of dust falling from his clenched fist. She wasn't so sure if it was a glitch. And he looked down also opening his hand so slowly. He hadn't felt it crumble within his hold nor had he sent the command from his frame to the holoform.

"Sunstreaker…" She warned.

"I'm sorry. I hadn't-."

Felicity scooted her chair closer to him and placed her hands over his. "We can slow down. We don't need to reveal our demons all at once. You don't have to. Slowly Sunstreaker. Slow. We have time." She hugged him close to her and nuzzled her head against his chest. "I am sorry I started this."

Sunstreaker still held the crushed charcoal in his hand and looked down to her. No matter what she always accepted anything he did as himself. No matter what he would say or do she made no judgment or connections. His demons. She said the word so easily.

It made his anger flare knowing how vulnerable he was to her but he pressed it down. Long ago had that anger been repressed and forgotten. He trusted Felicity too much. She knew his trust was delicate to be tried, tested, or betrayed.

He was safe with her. He was alright. He swallowed harshly before nodded his head. He continued to do so deposing the charcoal onto the table in a neat pile. He stared at it wrapping one arm around her. Despite her hold he didn't feel all that secure. The boxes in his mind were open and they weren't closing up. The burn in the back of his neck hadn't disappeared but instead had made itself more know.

He didn't know that was happening. It made him scared. But he knew that Felicity could stop whatever storm was about to come. She could stop anything, even himself.

"I am too."