Chapter 11. Feeling Empty

Stephen

"Don't resent me, and when you're feeling empty, keep me in your memory, leave out all the rest." Linkin Park

Stephen glanced up when Nick entered the room. Abby, who had been trying to fill him in on the parts of his life he didn't remember, leaving out the details of their relationship, other than that they'd been friends and colleagues, stood and excused herself to give them time to talk.

He rubbed his hands over his face and sighed as Cutter took the chair Abby had vacated.

"I don't know what to do," he sighed exasperated, "I don't remember the past year of my life, a life mind you where that girl has apparently become a large part of, and I can't tell you the first thing about her!" he raved.

"Calm down Stephen, and I'll try to tell you what I can." Nick said, putting a hand on the boy's shoulder. "Where do you want me to start?"

"Abby told me mostly everything, except who she is to me, she was incredibly vague there."

"She was probably trying not to make you uncomfortable. You and Abby have been dating for about a month now, but you got incredibly serious incredibly fast…" he started.

"So we've slept together then?"

"You've never said you did, but I assume so, yes. Also, she's, uh, living with you."

"Living with me, that's kind of sudden." Stephen replied incredulously.

"It was special circumstances."

"Riiight," Stephen said slowly, "This is getting more fun by the minute."

Abby

Abby collapsed down at a table in the hospital cafeteria and pulled out her cell phone. Generally, it was Connor she called when she needed someone to turn to, but giving the situation and the fact that it was involving Stephen, she found herself dialing a different number.

"Jenny, it's Abby, I hope you don't mind me calling, but I needed someone to talk to…"

"I talked to Nick while he was on his way to the hospital, why don't you come over," Jenny offered.

"Thanks,"

She pulled up at Jenny's flat about half an hour later, Jenny opening the door as soon as she knocked.

"What's wrong?" Jenny asked, "I know there was a chance of Stephen suffering amnesia, and I take it from your call he is?"

"He has it alright, he's lost the last year, which means he doesn't remember me at all," she said shakily, her composure wavering for the first time that day.

"What did you say when he asked who you were?" Jenny enquired.

"That I was a friend that worked with him. I don't think he bought it, I'm sure Nick has told him the full extent of our relationship by now."

"Maybe that's for the best, he will remember Abby," she said trying to reassure her, "Permanent cases of amnesia are almost unheard of."

"I know I just don't know what to do until he does remember, I mean I'm living with him for gods sake."

"The living with him part could get a little strange until he remembers," Jenny agreed.

"I think I'm going to move back into my flat with Connor," Abby said halfheartedly.

Stephen

Nick had been gone about twenty minutes, and Stephen was propped up into a sitting position with a book, when Abby showed back up at the hospital. He had no idea what to say to her.

"How are you feeling?" she asked, sitting down.

"Better, the doctor is cutting me loose tomorrow," he replied.

"That's good, I bet you're glad."

"Yeah, hospital food leaves something to be desired… Abby, why didn't you tell me the truth about us?" he asked, it didn't make sense to avoid the topic any longer.

"I didn't want to make things awkward," she replied quietly, "Actually, I'm glad you brought it up, I wanted to let you know I'm moving back into my old flat with Connor."

"You don't have to do that…" he started to protest.

"No, I really think it's for the best, you need time to figure things out."

By the time Nick dropped him off at his flat the next afternoon, Abby had already gotten her things out. He however, felt like a stranger in his own home, recognizing most of the furniture and knick-knacks but at a complete loss on most of the rest. Dropping his duffle bag on the bed, he walked over and picked up the photo cube on his night stand, he'd had it since college but had changed the pictures several times. The first picture showed him and Nick at a dig, he remembered this picture, the next one showed him and two guys, one he recognized as Connor, who'd stopped by briefly while he was in the hospital, the other he assumed was Captain Becker, who Nick had mentioned now worked with them, it looked like it had been taken at a bar. Two of the pictures featured Abby, one was her leaning against the hood of his car, the other was her sitting on his lap, arms around his neck, the setting also looked like a bar, and considering he was in the same outfit as he was in the picture with Connor and Becker, he assumed they'd been taken at the same time.

He lay down on the bed, folding his arms under his head, how long is it going to be before I remember my life, he wondered.

Abby

Abby tossed and turned trying to make herself comfortable, it was amazing how quickly she'd gotten used to Stephen's presence beside her at night, falling asleep with his arms around her. Now, back in her own bed, she felt incredibly cold and lonely.

I miss you Stephen, she thought, soft sobs racking her body.

She was surprised to see Stephen back at work the next morning, and was unable to control the smile that spread across her face as soon as his eyes met hers.

"You must be feeling better," she noted, "It's good to have you back."

"It's good to be back," he said, shooting her one of his trademark heart-stopping smiles, "How are you doing?" he asked, his piercing blue eyes boring into her like lasers.

She wasn't sure how to do this, how to go back to treating him like she had when they first met, with only exchanged banter and smiles, when more than anything she wanted to feel his lips against hers. Get yourself together Abby, she chastised herself, trying not to let on how affected she was at that moment.

"I'm fine, just trying to get settled back in my flat. What about you?"

"Wishing I could get back the last year of my life," he said earnestly.

"I can't imagine what you must be going through." she said, shaking her head.

"It's weird, having people around that I'm supposed to know, but don't. It can't exactly be easy on you either though, we were dating and the truth is I can't even tell you where we went on our first."

"Don't worry yourself too much, I'm fine, and it'll come back to you." she told him, not sure who she was trying to reassure more, him or herself.

"When you turn around do you recognize my face? You used to love me, you used to hug me but that wasn't the case." Avril Lavigne