It was going to be tricky smuggling another Saint out of their prison simulation. The Zin had tightened security parameters after Matt had been freed. Zinyak evidently did not want any more purple nuisances escaping his prison. It was more difficult now to isolate individual simulations, like finding a needle in a haystack.
He and Kenzi worked tirelessly to locate the simulation, their faces nearly pressed to the screen as they looked in. So it was not surprising that something began looking back.
While Rain was running down leads, she encountered CID for the first time.
A highly intelligent creature, CID had been trapped in the simulation for as long as the simulation had existed. If CID was to be believed, the first simulation had been created for him. CID had been imprisoned for so long that his physical body had long since passed away. Matt thought himself supremely fortunate, in comparison.
CID's knowledge of the Zin system was without equal. He displayed an unparalleled knack for assembling and disassembling components of the program and was extremely adept at moving through simulations as easily as one passes through a door. If anyone could find Pierce and the other Saints, this entity could.
In exchange for a physical shell in the outside world, CID agreed to use his knowledge to help the Saints stop Zinyak and his cronies.
Kenzi had been guiding Rain when they first encountered CID, so Matt did not become acquainted with him until after they had transferred CID's consciousness into the real world.
Miller intended to get the information out of CID at any cost. Matt was certain that he could be reasoned with. After all, Zinyak had cost CID his home as well.
Matt entered the ship compartment in which CID had taken up residence. The dim whir of machinery greeted him. The floating eyeball-like machine that CID's mind resided in swiveled towards him. The mech's optical plate lit up in recognition.
"Matthew Miller." CID spoke with an automated, perfunctory voice.
The hacker nodded at the machine, then wondered if the gesture meant anything in the creature's native culture. How did he speak English, anyways? No matter. "Hello, CID. I've come for information on one of Rain's Lieutenants, Pierce Washington. We need your help in tracking him down; the Zin have hidden him somewhere in the program."
CID's optic plate darkened. After a moment, the light returned. "I know the one you speak of; know them all. Human Specimen number 28403."
Matt's eyes widened. Kenzi had said CID was capable, but this was beyond anything Matt had imagined. It had taken CID only moments to accomplish what he and Kenzi had been working on for days! "You do? Great, and you can lead Rain there?" Matt could hardly believe his good luck.
"With compensation." CID's matter-of-fact voice said.
"Compensation?" Matt echoed. Of course, he thought. Practical does not mean idealistic. Why work for free when you can defeat your enemy AND get what you want? "What will it cost? An upgrade to your power cells maybe?"
CID's round body rotated slightly to the left and then the right. "Images."
What kind of images would a being that was essentially a floating intellect be interested in? No matter, it would be far easier than designing new functions on CID's apparatus. "What kind of images?" Miller asked.
"Images of the one you call Rain." The mech answered.
"WHAT?" Matt sputtered, completely caught off guard.
"You possess images of the female Rain." CID continued in his monotone voice. "In exchange for them, I will give you the location of Specimen 28403."
The machine's blank features were impossible to read. "I.. don't know what you're talking about." Matt hedged.
"The images stored on your computation device. The ones that show the female Rain Franklin-"
"Christ keep it down!" Matt shrieked and instantly regretted it. If the President found out that he possessed those photos, she would start wondering how he had gotten them. He had a pretty good idea of what she would do to him.
Matt listened to the ship carefully. The whirring of the robot was the only sound; their conversation had gone unnoticed. "Do we have a deal?" CID queried.
"You can't have those pictures." Matt said at last. Though Rain was relying on Matt to find her Lieutenant, the idea of surrendering her photos in exchange filled him with revulsion. He was sick to his stomach just thinking about it. An idea suddenly occurred to him. "But.. I know of images of another female on this ship that you can have."
"This location here, the Broken Shillelagh, is a nexus of the simulations." Matt explained to Rain, pointing to the screen at a posh bar in downtown Steelport. Rain leaned over him to see, her hair tickling his face. "Uh, erm.. I've isolated Pierce's simulation. You should be able to walk through to him."
"What, like a door?" Rain asked, turning her gaze on him. Behind her, CID puttered by them towards Kenzi's alcove.
Matt grinned impishly. "Very much like a door."
Rain ran her finger along his collar bone. "Nicely done, Matt. I knew you had it in you. Now patch me through."
The Broken Shillelagh was by all appearances a metropolitan pub. Fashionable cafe style tables and chairs adorned the porch under the pleasant glow of holiday lights. Upscale patrons lounged about, laughing inanely over their pixelated beverages.
As soon as Rain opened the Broken Shillelagh's double glass doors, the establishment was revealed as a facade. Unbearably bright light poured from the doorway. With little hesitation, Rain went through.
Watching The President step into Pierce's prison brought back the horrible memory of his own dungeon. Zinyak delighted in tormenting his captives. He taunted them, placing them in a cage whose bars were wrought iron fear and doubt.
But that was not the worst part. Nobody could sustain terror indefinitely. Eventually a person ceases to feel as they become desensitized, like loud music dulls the hearing. If Zinyak had only used fear, the prison would eventually cease to be effective.
No, the worst of it was the hope. It had been dangled in front of him like a life vest to a drowning man. Hope of being rescued, of the fear ceasing, of escape. Hope was crushing.
Matt's hope had been the moment of peace he experienced when he looked through that keyhole and spied a world where he was comfortable and content with a woman. The image of that world returned to him. The two of them, sitting on the couch, laughing and talking like it was the most normal thing in the world. As he turned the image over in his head, he realized why the face of the woman had looked so familiar.
It had been Rain.
Matt put aside the memory to focus on the task at hand. His chest ached, but he ignored it and monitored Rain's progress and vitals.
He recognized the terrain featured in the simulation. It had been the one-time base of Phillipe Loren that the Saints had claimed for their own. Zinyak was meticulous; everything was recreated as it had existed on Earth, down to the last detail. A menagerie of purple decor was assembled throughout the pad. Rain passed through it, her heart beat steady.
It did not take her long to find her Lieutenant. Pierce Washington was a tall, lanky man. Fashioned of rail thin muscle, Pierce was all angles. When they found him, Pierce was cursing loudly and using those sharp angles to crush the life out of a walking beverage can.
Matt did a double take at the screen. Pierce's worst nightmare was a Saints Flow can? He knew from his research into the gang that Pierce had been the face of the Saints' marketing campaign. Washington's smiling mug was plastered onto every piece of Third Street Saints merchandise and paraphernalia. Amongst the sea of products the Saints produced was the internationally acclaimed "Saints Flow" energy drink. Even in England, commercials were aired starring Pierce Washington drinking copious amounts of Saints Flow to accomplish any number of athletic feats. Matt laughed loudly and was immediately grateful that the Lieutenant could not hear him.
When Pierce noticed the President's arrival, his body visibly relaxed. He slung his weapon across his shoulder and let out a rich greeting. "Boss, am I glad to see you!"
"Your worst fear is marketing gone bad?" Rain quipped, unable to resist. Matt considered it odd how similarly they thought. She grinned and pulled Pierce into a brief hug.
Pierce released her, and reloaded a clip into his handgun. "Bad? Boss, these things are trying to KILL ME!"
Together, they moved deeper into the Saints' crib. Matt noted that they shared a relationship founded on ribald jokes and teasing. Though more of the Saints Flow attackers confronted them, the two friends bantered like it were a normal Sunday afternoon.
They had not gotten far when a deep rumbling struck the building. Shelves sent their cache of priceless sculptures and tasteless magazines tumbling to the floor.
"Was that an earthquake?" Rain asked, steadying herself.
Matt checked the programming. An anomaly, a very.. large anomaly, was causing a disturbance just outside the building. "Be prepared for anything, Rain." He warned through the headset.
Pierce winced in recognition and took off at a sprint towards the back bedrooms. "Come on, we're going to need more guns!"
Rain had grown fond of the "super powers" appropriated from the Zin wardens. The result of the stolen code was spectacular: Rain could freeze her enemies and smash them to bits, like they had been doused with liquid nitrogen and then blown apart. Matt suspected it brought her pleasure to use the weapon that Zinyak had designed for her captors to torture her. Matt's pulse raced to watch her in action.
The soda cans came in packs, wielding guns, knives and bats. One lunged at Pierce with a butterfly knife, forcing the Lieutenant to dodge to the side. This opened him up to an attack from behind, where another soda advanced swinging a crow bar. Pierce unloaded his handgun into the open pop tab.
Rain projected a burst of dazzling blue light to intercept the attacker, crystallizing it instantaneously. "That's what I'm talking about!" Pierce whooped triumphantly and side kicked the soda, shattering it into a hail storm of tasty freeze.
The weapons' cache lay at the end of a long hallway. A handful of Saints Flows attempted to bottle Rain and Pierce up, blocking the way. In these close quarters, the Saints were forced into hand to hand combat. Pierce began swinging, bunching his body up like a boxer. Rain crouched down and kicked wildly at legs, forcing several sodas to fall into each other.
When they had cleared a path, they opened the crate containing the arms. Pierce loaded himself down with an absurd amount of guns, stuffing pistols, hand grenades and machine guns into every available space on his person.
Rain crossed her arms over her chest in mild amusement, watching him stuff several firearms into his pants.
Pierce looked back over his shoulder. "Woman, I told you we need more guns!"
The President lifted both hands out in front of her and laughed. "I think you're strapped for the both of us."
Her Lieutenant shook his head derisively. "Oh yeah, you're laughing now, but when that thing shows up, play time's gonna' be over."
The two of them moved beyond the hallway to what had to have been Pierce's quarters. Large posters and life size pop art all featuring the Lieutenant's face covered nearly every available surface on the wall.
Pierce opened another case of weapons and started gathering more arms. Pale amber light streamed into the room from the tall glass windows that flanked the bed. Beyond the glass came a sudden penetrating, inhuman scream that sent tremors through the building. Something outside momentarily blocked out the light from the sun.
Rain's mouth gaped open as she stared out the windows. "Pierce, was that a giant hand I saw out there?" Disbelief colored her voice.
"I TOLD you we needed bigger guns!" Pierce shouted, flabbergasted.
Eying whatever awaited them outside, Rain joined Pierce at the box and started grabbing weapons.
A Saints Flow can charged them from behind, spraying bullets left and right.
"Down, Boss!" Pierce commanded, ducking behind the weapons' crate. Rain threw herself to the side to avoid the bullets that peppered the floor around her.
"Didn't want to blow up the crib, but-" Pierce lobbed something small and round towards the soda can and covered his ears. The small explosion that followed threw the can with such force that it left a gaping hole in the wall with smoke pouring out of it.
"This way!" He pulled Rain to her feet and headed into the passageway that had been opened up by the grenade.
A medium sized room awaited them. Matt could see that the furniture inside was characterized by soft curves and rounded edges. Rain took one step in and then seemed to reconsider.
"Uh, let's go around another way." She hesitated.
"Say what? There is no other way, Boss. You're the only one keeps a rocket launcher in their room." Pierce said, pushing forward into the chamber. He began to dig through the various weapon racks mounted on the wall.
Matt expected to see more purple in the innermost sanctum of the leader of Saints. True to the gang colors, there were splashes of the color. A shade of eggplant carpet covered the floor and select upholstered chairs were done in lilac. Other than that, what he mostly saw was blue. Azure sheets were piled atop the queen size bed. Cerulean and orchid curtains framed a glass door leading to the pool deck.
Matt noted that Rain's heart beat was beginning to rise. He wondered what it was that was causing her anxiety. Her pulse had been regular throughout the explosions, the shaking building and whatever had been outside. "Everything alright?" He asked through the headset.
"Come on, Pierce. Grab it and let's go!" Rain barked, her voice oddly nervous. She was shifting from foot to foot.
"Well woman, if you didn't have so many guns this wouldn't be a problem. You've got more guns than shoes!" Pierce continued rummaging through the room. "Wait a minute, what's this?"
Rain froze in place. Pierce held up a book. "Pride and Prejudice." He read the spine, which was half broken. The tome had evidently been well loved. Its pages were dog eared and yellow.
"Not sure. Maybe Shaundi's?" Rain suggested, looking like she was ready to bolt.
"Shaundi, reading? I'm pretty sure she'd rather get with Berk than flip through a novel." Pierce raised his eyebrows at Rain.
"Is now really the time for this?" Rain whined, looking out the gaping hole in the wall for something to kill.
"Oh now you want to be serious. But when soda cans are trying to kill me, it's fun and games. I see how it is." Pierce was waving his hands around in gesticulation, still holding the book. As he did, something shook loose from the pages and fell onto the floor.
Rain let out a long groan. Even from the screen, Matt could see that it was a faded pink star.
His breath caught in his throat. It belonged to him. Matt had worn that on his jacket throughout his tenure in Steelport. When Miller had fled the Syndicate, he had severed many ties, worried that Killbane and the Saints would change their mind and hunt him down. That had been one of the symbols of his past that he had left behind.
Why would Rain have kept that? Kept and hidden it away, Matt amended.
"What.. is this?" Pierce let out an incredulous chuckle that quickly crescendoed into a guffaw. He gripped his sides, which was difficult with all the weapons hanging from him. "Tell me this doesn't belong to that Decker boy. What was his name? Melissa M-"
"Pierce.. if you finish that sentence, with God as my witness I will finish you." The President hissed. She stalked across the room and angrily yanked the rocket launcher out of the same cabinet from which the book had come. Her heart was racing wildly.
Matt did not have time to dissect what he had seen. A loud crashing sound erupted on the deck. Hefting the RPG onto her shoulder, Rain yanked the glass door open.
The pool deck looked like a crime scene. Broken lounge chairs and were gutted where they lay. The remnants of a wet bar covered the deck in broken glass and tile.
Miller knew from experience as Asha's handler not to distract warriors from a battle unless absolutely necessary. He watched with restless energy, constantly scanning code for unseen threats.
Pierce joined her in a dead sprint, shouting. "Look out! Here comes Paul!"
Suddenly Hummer sized hands gripped the deck railing. Something monstrously large and purple ascended the building, towering over them.
"Paul?" Rain yelled back at Pierce. Paul was a Saints Flow can that made the Stay Puffed Marshmallow Man look like a child's toy. It let out a deafening screech that was painful even for Matt.
"Shoot them rockets at him already!" Pierce howled.
Spotting Pierce, Paul's eyes began to glow a fiery red and then erupted in lasers. The President ducked behind a partition just in time and dropped to one knee to load a rocket. The deck surrounding the partition simply melted, sending a shower of sparks and flames five feet into the air. "Why do those things always have eye beams?" She screamed over the blast.
Slapping the rocket in place, Rain climbed to her feet and deliberately moved into position in full view of the giant soda can. The monster energy drink stretched out a giant fist to crush her, his mouth wide open in another scream.
"Open wide, Paul." The rocket streaked forward out of Rain's launcher and into Paul's cavernous face, leaving a white incandescent trail in its wake.
Pierce's bawdy laughter echoed over the battlefield, which only enraged the giant soda. A flood of red hot lasers scorched the deck. Paul began to pound the building with his hands, sending concrete and pool water flying.
Rain threw herself beside her Lieutenant in the shelter of an awning. Pierce rammed another rocket into the RPG just in time to see the awning ripped away. With a great swat, Paul sent the Saints flying a good twenty feet into the air. Pierce disappeared over a billboard and Rain's body hurtled into the side of a building at bone breaking speed. She slid down the brick edifice and crumpled, motionless, as the RPG clattered nearby.
Matt struck the flat of his palm against the table in frustration. Rain's vitals were stable; she was alive. But he had to do something to slow the beast down, or she would not remain that way for long.
An idea struck him. Matt's keys tapped feverishly as he coded a "while loop". Paul's body stalled, buying him precious seconds.
"Rain, get up." The hacker all but screamed into the headset. "Get up! GET UP, you psychotic woman!"
Rain groaned and slowly rose. "Ugh, your voice is so whiney." She stood on shaky limbs and gathered the rocket launcher. "Pierce, are you ok?" She called out.
The radio was silent. Rain swore and raised the RPG to her shoulder, aiming it at Paul.
Just as the while loop wore off, the rocket arced out like lightning, exploding a hole through the soda can's face.
Paul screamed in primal rage and began to close the distance between them. Suddenly the unmistakable thicker-thwap of a helicopter could be heard. A military grade chopper shot through the sky between them, drawing attention away from Rain.
"Pierce is that you?" Rain shouted.
Washington's shrill voice answered back. "Hell yeah! Now kill that can!"
"Last rocket, Matt." Rain said as she lined up her shot. The rocket blazed through the sky and struck the can squarely in his lettering.
Matt had been working furiously ever since the while loop had worn off. "I think I know how you can defeat Paul." He said triumphantly.
"Oh, good." The President exhaled and ducked under a road barrier that Paul had thrown her way. The helicopter circled the giant soda, distracting him from a direct attack.
"I'll need you to get to the island with the big statue on it." Matt said as he typed away. "Bring Paul with you."
"Got it." She said and signaled Pierce to land. Washington guided the helicopter down, no easy feat in the midst of the chaos Paul was causing. With a running jump, Rain boarded. "Can you fly us to the island?" She shouted over the noise of the engine.
The helicopter lifted into the air, banking towards the distant island off Steelport's bay. "Yeah, but we're not going to outrun Paul." Pierce replied as the buildings beneath them grew smaller.
Rain pointed towards the location in the distance. "All good. Miller has a plan."
"Miller? Miller who?" Pierce asked and then began to laugh again. "Oh Melissa?!"
"Tell him I can hear him." Matt said irritably.
"Pierce, Matt says he'll crash our helicopter again if you don't shut it."
Washington raised his eyebrows. "Oh does he? Alright, I'll remember that one." Pierce had to bank sharply to the right to avoid Paul as the monster gave chase.
"Got it." Rain said and lifted a machine gun from over her Lieutenant's shoulder. She took up position at the fuselage door and began firing in Paul's direction.
They landed just ahead of the soda monstrosity on the small island. It was not much larger than a football field and its landscape was dominated only by a large statue. This sculpture was fashioned 100 feet tall in the image of a ladle wielding steelworker hero, Joe Magorac. "Matt?" Rain called as she crawled out of the chopper.
"Right, now get inside the statue." Miller managed between coding. He only needed to alter one more line and..
Rain gestured to the giant statue and she and Pierce booked it to the base of the sculpture, Paul hot on their heels.
"Got it!" Matt said to no one in particular. No sooner had they passed into the doorway at the base of the statue than it suddenly animated. Steel groaned and ripped free from concrete.
"Matt.. you're brilliant." Rain commented, awestruck.
"Glad you like it." He replied into the headset, a genuine smile escaping his lips.
At Rain's command, Joe Magorac surged forward, closing the distance between itself and Paul. With a mighty swing of the ladle, the statue connected with Paul's head.
"That's right, Joe. Kick his aluminum ass!" Pierce cheered loudly.
Joe swung like a lumberjack, putting his entire steel frame behind each movement. Paul recovered, aiming a massive kick at the steel giant.
The metal hero staggered for only a moment, then swung for the bleachers. Again and again, the ladle struck Paul with all the force of working class America.
The soda can crumpled, its knees splashing into the bay, exposing its neck.
"Don't worry, Paul. I'll pour one out for you." Rain quipped as the statue reached a steely glove up and ripped open the pop tab on Paul's head. Injured, the can was incapable of preventing the statue from lifting him high overhead. Paul's life blood, Saints Flow, gushed like a river from the open pop tab.
"Let's make a monument." Pierce said triumphantly. Rain tossed the can high into the air. It landed on the base of Joe's statue, crippled and dying. Paul let out a piteous mewl and was no more.
"You ready to get out of here?" Rain said after she and Pierce had basked in their victory.
"Yeah, can't WAIT to get back to Earth." Her Lieutenant replied.
The statue winced. "Right. Forgot to tell you, Earth got blown up." Rain said it matter-of-factually.
"WHAT?"
"Yeah, we live on a space ship now." Rain was blunt. "It's a long story. Ready Matt?"
Matt made a noise of assent as he prepared to terminate the program.
"Listen, Pierce. In a minute you're going to wake up on a ship with some ugly guys. Don't sweat though, we'll be there before you know it. Keith is already honing in on your ship."
Pierce took the news surprisingly well. ".. .. .. There better be some ladies on this ship."