Story 12: Trust Me, I Was Lying(the Epilogue to I Cannot Tell Lie)

It was simple in the end. All Jason had to do was avoid his brothers for 24 hours until the Truth Pills wore off. Damnit Dick. Why do you have to know how to retaliate? So far, it had been a simple matter; Alfred was cleaning, Bruce was at work, Tim and Damien were at school, and Dick was at BCPD chasing traffic violators with parking tickets. However, it was nearing the end of the day, and they would all be coming home soon. Jason needed someplace to hide.

He put on some of Dick's tasteless non-descript clothes and jumped out his bedroom window. He ran down the street intending to loose himself in bustling downtown Gotham. If they set their minds to it, his brothers would be able to track him down. They were the best after all, but so was he. All he had to do was keep one step ahead of them until 8:00 tomorrow morning. It should be a simple game of hide and seek.

"Where's honest Todd? I have a few questions for him," said Damien as soon as he walked through the doors of Wayne Manor after school.

"You and me both," agreed Tim.

"And I am so going to get it all on tape," added Dick. His brothers smirked at him. They were all going to enjoy this. "Let's spilt up and find him."

They searched the house and the cave thoroughly but found no sign of Jason. However, they were able to deduce his flight from the open window in his bedroom, Dick's missing hoodie and sweats, and the footprints outside in the yard. Apparently, he was trying to give them the slip. Were they going to let him get away with that? Absolutely not. This was a job for the world's finest detective team; Nightwing, Red Robin, and Robin.

It was 2 O'clock in the morning when they caught up with him. Unfortunately for Jason, his brothers knew him better than he would have liked. As he casually walked out of the corner 7/11, he was set upon by three masked vigilantes. He put up a commendable fight, but seriously, three against one? The odds were not in his favor. Jason was bound hand and foot before being dragged back to stately Wayne Manor and securely tied to a chair in the study. Someone turned off all the lights except for a harsh interrogation lamp which was aimed at Jason's face. Jason squinted to see the faces of his brothers past the blinding light and noticed Dick was holding the video camera. Uh,oh. Not good.

"Where were you on the night of March 24?" asked Damien in a low accusatory voice. "You will tell me the truth Todd."

"Of course he will," said Tim rolling his eyes, "he's under the influence of a truth pill."

"I don't know. I don't keep dates for everything I do," Jason snapped.

"Do you ever think of murdering that irritating twerp, Drake, in his sleep?" Damien pressed, shoving his nose in Jason's face.

"Hey!" Tim planted his fists on his hips.

"No."

"Guys," inturputed Dick, "there's a better way to do this. Play it like truth or dare but without the option of a dare."

"What makes you think I'll answer at all?" Jason demanded angrily.

"Because if you don't, I'll send this picture of you to everyone on my contact list." Dick held up his phone so Jason could see the picture. It was a photo of Jason coming out of the pool locker-room at the YMCA in a leopard-print speedo. Dick had run off with all his other clothes and left Jason with only the embarrassing swimsuit and a note. Jason growled. Knowing Dick, it would go viral in the superhero community if he didn't cooperate. There are some people you should never cross swords with in a battle of pranks.

"Fine," he growled, "ask away."

Grinning, Tim asked, "Jason Todd, who was your first kiss?"

"Barbra Gordon." It had been innocent enough; they were playing a game of Spin the Bottle at a party. But Jason got a little satisfaction from the horrified, shocked, dumbfounded look on Dick's face. Tim looked a little disgusted and Damien just looked confused. Yeah, awkward moment. But worth it.

"Right," said Tim coming out of his trance, "what was your most cringe-worthy moment in high-school?"

"Seriously?"

"Yes. Remember the photo."

"Fine. One day it was raining and Alfred was late to pick me up, so my crush, Aleksandra Fererri, offered to drive me home. We were sitting in the back seat; I was on one end, her brother was sleeping on the other and Alex was in the middle. I decided to kiss her. So, I closed my eyes and went for it. F***'in bad idea. She bent down to grab her phone and I leaned past her and accidently kissed her older brother Michael. There was awkward silence in the car all for the rest of the drive." When will this stupid truth pill wear off?

His brothers were laughing hysterically. Jason tried again to get out of his ropes, but it was useless. There was just no way out of this bad situation.

"Laugh while you can. You won't laugh so easily with a split lip," Jason snarled.

"Sorry," laughed Dick, "next question: how long have you gone without showering?"

Jason's face turned red. "Nearly a month." Stupid truth pill.

"A month?" Tim gawked at him.

"I was stranded in a back-water town in the middle of no-where New Mexico," Jason explained defensively.

"That is no excuse for smelling like a week-old donkey corps," sniffed Damien.

"Jealous much Damien," teased Tim, "you could use a shower right now yourself." That comment started a brief fight between the younger boys until Dick got fed up with it and stepped in.

"Alright Jason," said Tim returning to his master interrogator posture and straightening his sweater, "out of everyone you know, who has the coolest eyes?"

"Let's skip this one," Jason suggested. Interested now, his brothers shook their heads. "Alright. Dick. Dick has the most interesting eyes." That just sounds wrong. Darn these truth pills. It's not what it seems.

That got a response. Everyone went silent again and the smiles fell from their faces. "What!" cried Dick. "Jason!"

"What? Your eyes are such a cool kind of weird blue. I've never seen that color anywhere else," Jason explained. "I swear that's the reason the ladies like you so much. Lord knows there's nothing else about you worth looking at."

"Well thanks Jay!" said Dick sarcastically. "I'll have you know that there are many reasons the ladies love me."

Jason rolled his eyes. "Yeah, whatever. Dream away lover-boy. If you didn't have those eyes of yours, you'd probably strike out in a…"

"Jason," Dick snapped, "not in front of the kids. Besides, Starfire fell for me before she saw my eyes."

"Well then, she must be blind."

"Ok guys," Tim butted in, "next question: what was your guilty-pleasure movie?"

Jason grumbled. He couldn't take much more of this. "Titanic."

"Really? A mushy romance/tragedy? Never would have guessed," said Tim.

"Do you like My Little Pony?" asked Dick laughing.

"Hell no!"

"I think the truth pills wore off."

The sun was coming up. Dick untied Jason and braced himself for the inevitable attack. Jason leapt from the chair and tackled Dick. Tim and Damien joined in and it turned into an all-out cat-fight. The ruckus woke up Bruce and the ever-alert butler. They came down the stairs; Bruce in his dressing-gown and Alfred in his pinstriped pajamas armed with a broom. They stopped when they saw the boys fighting again. Alfred sighed and rested the broom against the doorframe. Boys.

The next evening:

Jason walked into the living with a scowl on his face. "What are you dorks up to?" he demanded.

Dick raised his beer. "We're going to watch Titanic," he said with a mischievous grin. "Come on and join us. We put it on just for you."

"Do you have a death wish, Dick?" growled Jason.

"Look Todd, if I have to watch this horrible- effeminate-chick-flick, so do you," snapped Damien.

"Here, here. We must all suffer together," declared Dick taking a sip of his beer. He held out a fresh bottle to Jason who walked over and snatched it angrily. The movie was starting. Jason remembered the scene and smiled where non of them could see it.

"We have caramel pop-corn," Tim tempted him.

Jason sighed. "Move over Dick." Dick shifted to the middle of the couch towards Tim to make room for Jason. "But I'm only staying until the pop-corn is gone," he promised taking the lid off his bottle of Pale Ale.

Just then, Alfred walked into the room and replenished the pop-corn bowl. "You might be here for quite a while," laughed Tim.

"I hate you all," grumbled Jason reaching for some of the butler's famous caramel-coated pop-corn. His brothers laughed because that, they knew, was a lie.

Author's Note: I had one request to finish the story with Jason and the truth pills. I hope you enjoyed. Special thanks to my boyfriend for the most cringeworthy moment; I never thought I'd see him kiss my brother (however unintentionally). I laughed but my brother and my boyfriend were a little less amused.