I won't say too much, as this chapter is a monster! BUT I will warn you to have some hankies ready. This one goes out especially to the R/C fans and the A/B fans. Hang in there everyone! Good things are a comin'! THANKS FOR READING AND COMMENTING!

Chapter Twelve

2 Weeks to Christmas (part III)

"God, I hate these things," Robert groaned, taking another drink from his glass.

"You say that every year," Cora answered with a shake of her head. She was used to her husband's pessimism when it came to the office holiday party. "You always grumble and complain and I always ask, 'then why do it?' to which you reply…"

"I have to!" he answered, as if on cue. "I'm the CEO of a small business; it's expected that we have one of these things…" he took another long drink from his glass, finishing the scotch. "I don't know why I bother, though; everyone knows I'm a complete Scrooge."

"Scrooge?" Cora shook her head. "More like a Grinch."

Robert lifted an eyebrow at this. "There's a difference?"

"Of course!" Cora smiled, her hands going to his shirt collar and fixing his tie which had become askew. "One is a beloved children's book character who's fuzzy and green, while the other is a grumpy old miser. And you, my darling, are not a miser."

"Nor am I green and fuzzy," he muttered.

Cora giggled to herself. "No…but I'd much rather hug and cuddle Mr. Grinch than Mr. Scrooge," she leaned up then on her toes to brush her lips against his. "And the point of both stories is that at the end of the day, they both see the light and save Christmas…which you do every year, in your own way, when you help give one of these parties."

She was looking at him in that way that still caused his heart to soar, even after thirty-five years of marriage. "I don't deserve such praise," Robert muttered, feeling awfully bashful about the way she was talking. However, he couldn't help but smile and return the little kiss she had given him. "I especially don't deserve such praise when I have to ask you to do the dreaded…'circling'," he apologized.

But Cora shook her head, her smile never leaving. She was in a good mood tonight, and that made Robert happy. She had told him the other day that she found a caterer for her school's reception after the Christmas concert. One less stressful thing to worry about! And he knew she was looking forward to their trip back to Yorkshire for Christmas…and for their anniversary. Thirty-five years this Boxing Day, he thought to himself. I can't believe how quickly it's all gone…

"Oh darling, we all have to do these little tasks," she said with a smile, before holding out her nearly empty wine glass to a passing waiter. "You endure my Christmas concerts, I can certainly endure 'making the rounds' and playing the role of 'good boss' wife' by chit-chatting with various people, especially the ones you wish to stay as far away from as possible."

"You're a gem, Cora," he sighed, kissing her cheek. He looked back and frowned then. "I never said your Christmas concerts were something to 'endure'," he protested.

Cora laughed and shook her head. "No, you've never spoken the words, but the amount of time I've caught you sitting in the back, wincing whenever a child would come to a microphone and sing some carol, I knew it was testing your patience."

He frowned a little at this, his face flushing slightly out of embarrassment. His wife laughed and then kissed his cheek. "Alright, I'm off," she sighed, taking a sip of her wine before putting on a dazzling smile. "Wish me luck!"

"You'll need it," he muttered under his breath before she turned. "Especially if you have to talk to Julian from HR," he groaned with a shake of his head. A fate worse than death, in his mind.

She kissed him again, gave him one last smile, before turning and beginning her circle around the room, thanking various workers for coming, telling them how lovely it was to see them all again, asking after them, their families, learning what their holiday plans were, and so forth. Cora was a natural at such things, and despite what his own mother would say, he truly believed that part of her charm was her "Yankee-ness".

A slight tap on his shoulder brought him out of his thoughts. He turned his head, and practically gasped at the vision that greeted him. "Jane!" She smiled up at him, her eyes bright and her cheeks pink, and she held out her hands, as if inviting him to take a good, long look at her. And despite himself, he did. "You look beautiful…" he murmured without thinking.

Jane giggled, her sleigh bell laugh tickling the air around his ears. "Oh gracious, this old thing?" she sighed, looking down at her dress. It was a deep crimson color, and it clung to her body in such a way that a man did not need an imagination to envision the luscious curves beneath the fabric. The hem stopped at her mid-thigh, and the neckline was quite low…thrusting her bosom up in such a way that Robert had to scream at himself to keep his eyes above her neck. "You're too kind, sir…"

Robert needed a refill—badly. "Well…I um…everything seems to be going wonderfully!" he attempted at the small talk.

Jane smiled and nodded her head. "Yes, I think everyone is enjoying the venue…" she glanced across the room at several other people, who were all gathered around the various nude pictures, either gawking or laughing while pouring themselves more booze. "The food really is delicious—I must thank you for giving me the information for Ivy's," she said with a smile.

"Oh! Well um…you're very welcome," Robert replied, still doing everything he could to keep his eyes above her neckline. The only problem of course was the way her ice-blue eyes seemed to draw him in…like a siren, tempting a ship.

"And the music is good too," Jane murmured, glancing over at the DJ.

Robert nodded his head. "Yes, I made sure we steered clear of the man who was in charge of music at my daughter's wedding," he attempted to joke.

Jane's sleigh bell laugh filled the air around them. She looked at Robert in a way that that caused his throat to tighten and made him want to pinch himself; was he dreaming? That such a gorgeous woman could look at him like that?

"Would you care to dance?" she asked with a sweet smile.

Robert's mouth fell open. "I…I…" he was blubbering like an idiot. "I um…" he coughed then, making a show of clearing his throat. "Won't your boyfriend mind?" he asked, pointing towards Evelyn Napier. He was surprised to learn that the distant friend of the Crawley family had a connection to the gallery where they were having their party. Had he known, he may have contacted Evelyn himself, rather than ask Jane to do all the work.

Jane glanced at Evelyn, who was moping all by himself in a corner, and then shook her head very quickly. "Oh no, no, he's not my boyfriend," she protested a rather too passionately. "And besides…doesn't a good secretary deserve a dance with the boss before his card starts filling up?" she teased.

Robert rarely danced at these things. Cora sometimes insisted that they dance, and so he tried to indulge her, but that was usually it. Quite frankly, he thought he was a horrible klutz, and dancing just seemed to make this all the more obvious. However…the way Jane was looking at him…holding her perfectly polished and manicured hand out to him…and her eyes looking at him like two soft, round, blue pools…and the way her teeth nibbled on her bottom lip…

"Alright," he all but squeaked, before taking her hand and swallowing the large lump in his throat, letting her lead him out onto the floor. Jane merely smiled…and before Robert realized what was happening, had taken his left hand in her right, and placed his right hand at her waist…and then quickly closed the gap between them, until her body was pressed against his.

"Small talk!" his mind screamed. It was the only way to keep himself from shaking. "Well, as I was saying, Jane," Robert began, rushing his words a little too quickly. "You have done an excellent job; truly, you should give yourself a pat on the back."

She blushed then, and Robert felt his body tremble even more. "Why don't you pat my back for me, sir?"

His knees nearly buckled at her comment. "I…I beg your pardon?"

She grinned then, and leaned up, until her lips were close to his ear. "It's all for you," she whispered. "Everything…" she explained. "All of this…" Oh God, was it his imagination, or did she just press herself even closer to him? "It's all for you…" She moved back then to the so-called "comfortable" distance they had been maintaining when they started dancing, but the damage to Robert's mind and body, had already been done. He had to be very careful, then, to keep certain portions of himself away from her.

Cora was talking with a few people from across the room. Someone made some comment about one of the pictures hanging overhead, depicting several nude men thrusting the lower half of their bodies in a rather crude and suggestive manner towards the camera. She turned her head to follow where they were pointing…but instead of looking at the picture, her eyes fell upon the dancing couple that was her husband and his secretary.

Cora didn't know Jane that well. She knew that the woman was new to the office, having only started sometime in November. Robert didn't talk about her much, but really, the only employees of his that she knew at all were John Bates and Anna. Cora looked at Jane…and suddenly felt herself cringe slightly.

She was much…younger, Cora realized. Not as young as their daughters, but…at least ten years younger than herself. She was also very pretty. Her dark hair had none of the gray that Cora tried to cover up, and her skin also looked impeccably smooth and creamy. And she knew it was natural, too—no, Jane was not one who had gone under the knife for the sake of her beauty. She also had a lovely figure, and the dress she wore was the sort that would grab the attention of any man. Cora found herself looking down at her own dress…a simple black velvet skirt that went all the way down to her ankles, and a long-sleeve black lacy top. She wore this because it looked very cold outside. And she couldn't recall the last time she had worn something that short…or that would show that much cleavage.

She swallowed and bit her lip, looking up and away from her clothes, and avoiding any surface that could show her reflection.

Thirty-five years. She and Robert had been married for thirty-five years (or it would be thirty-five by the time the 26th rolled around). In that time frame they had produced three beautiful daughters, each of whom Cora couldn't be more proud. And while their romance had been a "slight" whirlwind (his mother certainly hadn't approved of the two of them rushing to get married the day after Christmas) Cora always felt that she and Robert's relationship was solidly grounded on honesty, trust, and most of all, the deepest love. She couldn't be happier, even when they had their rows, and in thirty-five years they had had many…but despite those moments, the good times always outweighed the bad.

So this was what she told herself, when a different green monster, one that was far less fuzzy, and far less beloved than any character created by Dr. Seuss, tried to emerge within her. She told her heart and mind to not let jealousy win. Robert was her husband, in the end. And Jane was hardly the only beautiful woman in the room.

…Yet seeing her dancing with Robert right now, seeing her smile up at him, hold him close, and seeing him hold her and smile back…

Something inside began to hurt. And Cora suddenly felt very, very inadequate.

The party had been going on for several hours. But she always arrived late to these things. Anna wasn't much of a "party goer"; she preferred quiet evenings at home, reading Jane Austen with a cup of tea, than going out to clubs and getting drunk. She also supposed it had something to do with the fact that she was and had been in love with one man for nearly seven years, so if he wasn't at the party, then really, what was the point?

There had been times in the past when John Bates didn't come. Anna remembered how one year in particular, she looked around and around for an entire hour, wondering where he was, until Robert told her John couldn't make it. There must have been some truth to what Robert had said about "everyone" knowing about her feelings for Mr. Bates, since she recalled how last year, she showed up and was told, not five minutes after walking into the party, that John wasn't going to be there. That had probably been the most depressing Christmas party she had ever attended.

But this year…she had a feeling. She wasn't sure why, especially since she had been feeling so depressed as of late about her situation with Mr. Bates, but yes, she had a strong feeling that this year…things would be different.

"The moment is now…" she repeated to herself while putting on her make-up for the evening. "Take control and make this your moment…"

After seven dress changes, Anna finally settled on a simple pale pink gown, one that the salesgirl had told her really brought a shimmer to her blonde hair. She hoped Mr. Bates would like it…she didn't think he had ever seen her in this color. She decided in the end to simply let her hair hang naturally, rather than put it up or pull it back into a braid. Her make-up was as natural as she could make it ("earth tones are best for your skin type," another salesgirl had told her), and her shoes, while meant to enhance her height, were by no means thin stilettos. Satisfied (or as satisfied as she could be) she departed, and then finally arrived.

The first friendly face she saw walking into the party was Cora—Mrs. Crawley. Cora had always been very friendly to her, and while Anna had never told anyone about her feelings for Mr. Bates, she had a feeling (especially now after her meeting with Robert) that Cora knew. Cora was standing by the table where wine was being poured, and Anna quickly moved across the room, murmuring a few "hellos!" and "Merry Christmas'!" to different people, before asking for her own glass of white wine beside Cora.

"Anna!" Cora said, turning and smiling at her. "Look at you!"

Anna blushed but smiled and ran her hands over her skirt, trying to smooth any wrinkles that she saw. "Thank you, Mrs. Crawley," she whispered, before murmuring her thanks to the bartender and taking a sip of her wine.

"I didn't see you earlier; I thought perhaps you weren't going to come?"

Anna shook her head, although her eyes were already scanning the room. "No, no, I um…just took a little longer getting ready, that's all."

Cora nodded, and Anna saw a small, knowing smile, spread across the woman's face. "Well, he's a very lucky man."

Anna blushed even brighter and took a bigger gulp of wine, partly for courage, and partly because she was nervous and she prayed the wine would help calm her.

"Well, you've just saved me, my dear," Cora remarked in confidence. "I've been 'making the rounds', and now that you're here, I can take a break and actually talk to someone I enjoy talking to!"

Anna laughed and blushed once more, but continued to scan the room, her eyes falling on Robert…who she noticed was dancing and laughing with Jane, his secretary. She frowned a little at this, and glanced out of the corner of her eye at Cora…who also happened to be looking ahead at Robert.

"Do you know Jane very well?" Cora asked, surprising Anna with her question. Indeed, the question nearly caused Anna to jump with surprise.

"Oh! Um…well, not that well, really. Her desk is bit of a distance from mine—"

"Robert seems to be on friendly terms with her," Cora remarked, taking another sip of her wine. Anna frowned at this and wasn't sure what she should say. "I mean, I know she's his secretary, and he was quite friendly with Mrs. Bird, back when she still worked at the office—of course, I don't recall Robert ever dancing with Mrs. Bird…" Cora all but muttered. "Nor do I recall him dancing with anyone really…three times in a row."

Anna bit her lip. How should she respond? Was Robert aware of this? About how things were looking right now? About how they looked to his own wife?

"Well…" she cleared her throat and put on a smile. "He um…he dances with everyone, because as the boss, that's his job, yes?" oh God, how pathetic did that sound? Her brain was telling her to stay out of this, to not get involved. None of this was any of her business, and she shouldn't be trying to make up explanations for her boss' behavior, especially when she didn't know the complete story. But she knew that a part of the reason she was "defending" Robert, if one could call it that, was because of how ardently he was pushing and rooting for her and John Bates.

Cora chuckled to herself, but it didn't sound like a pleasant, genuine chuckle of good humor. "Some more than others," she muttered under her breath.

Anna licked her lips, wondering if she should go and try and "cut in" between Jane and Robert, however she noticed Cora's expression change, and her eyes go wide, before she reached forward and took Anna's wine glass right out of her hands! Anna opened her mouth to ask Cora why she had done that…but all traces of speech escaped…when a voice murmured behind her, "Would you care to dance?"

Her face paled.

And then a deep, warm heat began to spread across her skin.

She swallowed the nervous lump in her throat, and slowly turned on her heel…and felt the world stop all around her, as she looked up into the warm, smiling eyes, of John Bates.

"You look beautiful Anna," he murmured, his smile making his handsome face even more handsome in her eyes. "So…would you like to?"

"I…I…" Anna couldn't believe it. This was…the first time in all the time she had known him, this was the first time he had ever asked her to dance. It was just so unbelievable. "Me?" she squeaked, a part of her wondering if she should pinch herself. Oh please, please, don't let this be a dream!

John chuckled but nodded his head. "Yes, Anna…will you dance with me?"

"Go on!" Cora hissed in her ear. Anna looked back at her boss' wife and Cora was grinning widely, nodding her head in encouragement. Anna bit her lip…and felt a happy smile spread across her face.

She turned back to Mr. Bates and nodded her head. "I'd love to," she whispered.

He grinned and took her hand…and immediately, Anna felt the most wonderful warmth shoot up her arm and spread throughout her body…as John Bates led her out onto the dance floor, just as the fast-paced music suddenly slowed to that of a sweet, romantic song.

Her palms were sweating. Her knees were shaking. Truthfully, she was trembling all over! But despite how nervous she was about the possibility of stepping on his foot…she couldn't stop grinning. And even as her breath slowed and the butterflies in her stomach flew wild, she continued smiling…as she felt Mr. Bates' hand come around waist…before resting against her spine. Anna took his offered hand…and her other hand slid to his forearm…and together, they began to sway to the music.

This is happening…she realized. I'm dancing with John Bates. Mr. Bates, my Mr. Bates, asked me to dance with him. HE asked ME to dance! Her head seemed to instinctually move to his shoulder…and soon she felt her cheek move until it was resting there, and still they continued to sway and move as the music enfolded them, very much the same way that his arms seemed to be enfolding her.

Perfect, she thought to herself as her eyes began to flutter close. The hand that had been holding hers, curled slightly…until she felt her hand, nestled comfortably in his, rest against his chest, just over his heart. Was it her imagination? No…his heart seemed to be beating just as rapidly as hers. And yet everything else had fallen away. It was just the two of them on this dance floor…

Indeed, it couldn't have been more perfect.

"Oh God…" Cora groaned, her head throbbing. "I'm going to have the worst hangover tomorrow; I can already feel the migraines coming on."

Robert looked at her with sweet sympathy…a look that Cora honestly didn't want to see at the moment. "Do you want me to make you some coffee?" he asked.

"No…" she groaned, unzipping the skirt of her dress and quickly shimmying it down her hips and legs. "No, that will just keep me up; the best thing I can do is take something to try and combat the pain before it hits and get some sleep," she muttered, stepping out of the skirt and returning it to the its hanger.

"Well…" Robert sighed, removing his jacket and undoing his tie. "I must say I thought tonight was successful!"

Cora chose to keep her mouth closed.

"Yes, for the short amount of time we had in preparing for that party, everything seemed to go splendidly."

Cora shrugged out of her blouse and carefully rehung it, before picking up her silk nightgown which was lying across the end of their bed. "Yes, Jane did a very good job…" she murmured as she slipped the gown over her head. "She seems to be quite perfect."

"I can't deny, I was impressed—although I think next time, if we ever find ourselves at a gallery like that again, I will make sure I go there and um…have a look to see what images we'll be surrounded by all evening."

Cora went into the adjoining bathroom and picked up a water glass, before reaching for some painkillers in the medicine chest. "And um…how are things going with her?"

"Her?"

"Jane…" Cora answered, trying very hard to keep her annoyance at bay. The last thing she wanted was to start a fight, but at the same time she couldn't deny, a part of her was spoiling for one. "You hardly ever talk about her…and I only ask because I know that she began in November…but she seems to be settling in well there?"

Robert nodded his head as he began to slip on his pajamas. "Yes, she seems to be getting along just fine."

Cora took the painkiller, although she wished it could calm the pain she was feeling rising in her heart. "I think tonight was the first night I met her," she murmured, coming back into the bedroom and moving around to her side of the bed. "And I must say…she is very pretty."

A pause fell across the room. An awkward pause.

Cora fluffed her pillow slightly and began to peel the covers back. She glanced over at her husband, waiting to see and hear his response. Robert did seem to pause in buttoning up his pajamas as the words settled around him. He then turned his head and looked at her…and put on a smile. "Is she?" he murmured, coming over the bed and settling down in it next to her.

If she hadn't seen the two of them dancing, if she hadn't seen the way her husband had looked at Jane…she probably would have been satisfied with his simple response. His comment would have left her thinking, "oh Cora, you're being silly, letting this younger woman play on your insecurity and letting your pride and vanity rule your brain…"

But she had seen them dancing. And she had seen her husband's face, as he looked down at the other woman before him…a woman who wasn't her.

"You know she is, Robert," she muttered in response to his words. There was no amusement in her voice. Not one hint.

She turned her back on him, not bothering to lean in and give him her usual goodnight kiss, and settled down beneath the covers, reaching over and turning the light off on her bedside table. "Be careful there," she whispered, mainly to him, but also to herself.

They had danced four times that night—FOUR! And three of them had been slow dances! Which meant that three times during the evening, John Bates had his arms around her. But it didn't just stop with dancing. After each dance, he would lead her off the floor, his hand on the small of her back, and they would either go and sit and talk like old friends who had been doing this sort of thing for so long…or they would walk around the room, looking at the art or talking with others…like a couple.

Just like a couple.

…And not once did his mobile go off.

Anna wondered if maybe she should pinch herself, to make sure she wasn't dreaming. As the party was winding down, John asked how she had come there. She blushed and told him she had taken the tube—her car was in the shop. "Can I offer you a ride?" he softly asked, and Anna thought that if she weren't sitting, she would melt into a puddle. All she could do was numbly nod her head—oh God, this night was getting better and better!

So here she was, sitting in the passenger seat of his car, her hands folded on her lap, but her fingers twisting over one another in both nervousness and excitement. He would smile and glance at her every so often from the driver's seat, and she would return the smile…but they didn't speak. No, they sat in silence together, but it wasn't awkward, amazingly. It was very…comfortable. And she loved it.

But as the car drew closer and closer to her flat, Anna began to fidget a little more in her seat. Oh God, what's going to happen now? Is he simply going to pull up to the curb and wait for me to get out? Will he park the car? Will he get out himself? If he does, should I wait and see if he'll come around and open my door? Or should I just not assume such things and open it myself? Oh Lord…what if…what if he tries to kiss me? WILL HE TRY TO KISS ME? Do I even remember HOW to kiss? It's been over seven years since I kissed anyone! And if he does kiss me, how should I respond? Should I open my mouth? Should I expect tongue? Oooohhh good God, the very thought of John Bates kissing me, let alone kissing me with his tongue…ooohhh gracious, I'm melting at the thought! Lord it's hot…I wonder if I can roll the window down? But that will only spark further questions, and I don't dare do that—but maybe I'm getting myself worked up over nothing? Maybe he'll just give me a polite peck on the cheek? That would be lovely, but…if he does, I mustn't look disappointed! I must smile and show my gratitude…and…and maybe I can ask him out for dinner? What is he doing on Christmas? Maybe I can invite him over for Christmas? I can cook a small turkey! We can watch the Queen's speech and the "Doctor Who" Christmas special! Does he like "Doctor Who"? We could watch that other Christmas special, that period drama one? But does he like that sort of thing? Oh it doesn't matter what we watch, but I should ask him though…right, I'm going to do it, I'm going to ask him to join me, and—

"Is this the place?"

Anna gasped, not realizing that they had reached her flat. How long had they been sitting there? She realized that not only had they reached it, but that the car was parked off alongside the road. "Y-y-yes," she stammered, blushing profusely. She tried to swallow the sudden nervous lump that had formed itself in her throat. Be calm, stop panicking. "Thank you, John—"

"Oh here, let me!" She had only placed her hand on the door handle, but John quickly unbuckled his seatbelt and was now rushing around to her side of the car to open the door. She watched and found herself blushing even brighter…but also smiling.

"Thank you," she murmured, as she took his offered hand and climbed out of the car.

"My pleasure," he replied, causing Anna's cheeks to burn even more…but despite her nervousness, she looked up and met his gaze…and swore her heart stopped beating.

The way he was looking at her…it was like the way she had been looking at him, all those years. There was something in the depths of his eyes, something…that she had only dreamed about. An emotion that matched what she felt in her heart, but had never believed could be possible. Was it?

"The ground looks a bit icy," he murmured, glancing away to their feet.

Anna followed his eyes and found herself silently nodding her head. She looked up at him then…and realized he had offered her his arm for support. Holding her breath, she wrapped her arm around his…and together, they walked towards her door. "I'm on the ground floor," she murmured, not sure why she was explaining this, but Mr. Bates simply smiled and nodded his head, as she fumbled for the keys, and tried to open the door as gracefully as possible, which was becoming an odd feat. The door to the building opened…and Anna noticed that Mr. Bates…was following her inside. She bit her lip, and tried (with great difficulty) to contain her excited smile. I think he's really going to try and kiss me! But she also quickly told herself to not get her hopes up. After all, she had been waiting for something like this to happen in nearly seven years…

"This is me," she murmured, pointing to the door that led to her flat. "Number 1-A."

"A for Anna?" he asked with a chuckle.

She blushed but giggled back, quickly tucking a fallen strand of hair behind her ear. Another moment of silence fell between them…only this time, it wasn't so comfortable. There was a charge in the air now…and Anna could feel the anticipation rising.

Put your key in the door and turn it at the very least, her mind kept telling her. With a deep breath, she did just that, and this time, she wasn't such a klutz in trying to get the door opened. "Thank you, John…" she whispered, turning and smiling up at him. He stood in her doorway, but made no move to follow her. "Thank you for the ride."

"My pleasure," he murmured again, and Anna swore the charge was becoming more and more electric. Something's going to happen…something really IS going to happen!

A part of her brain screamed at her to ask him to come in, or at the very least to make her invitation to him to join her for Christmas (if he had no other plans), but all those thoughts faded…as she noticed his head, slowly moving towards hers…and slowly descending, until his lips…

…Grazed her cheek.

Despite what she had told herself, Anna couldn't help but feel a little disappointed.

She put on a smile as he lifted his head away. "Good night, Anna," he whispered.

"Good night, Mr. Bates."

"John."

She blushed but nodded her head. "John," she repeated. Then, feeling a moment of boldness, she leaned up and brushed her own lips against his cheek. She lingered a little longer than she should, she knew, but it didn't matter. She smelled his cologne, she felt the heat from his body, and remembered how wonderful it had felt earlier, being held in his arms while they danced.

She took a step back and continued smiling up at him. "Thank you, again…"

"You're welcome." They lingered there for another moment, both of them looking at each other. He seemed to be leaning in, as if to say something to her, and she couldn't help but lean in to…hoping that perhaps he would say something—or do something else. But then a sigh escaped his lips…and took a step back. "I should go…"

"Oh…" Anna nodded her head with understanding, although in truth she didn't understand. Still, she knew she shouldn't have gotten her hopes up—feeling his lips on her cheek was more than she could have hoped for in the past, so she should just be thankful for what she had. She couldn't let the fact that they hadn't kissed, not in the way she wanted, not in the way she had dreamed about for so long, to ruin her evening. It was a wonderful evening—they had danced, they had laughed, he had driven her home, it was very much like a date, and she could pretend that it truly was. "Well…I don't want to keep you," she murmured. "Thank you again, for the ride. I'll see you on Monday."

He nodded his head, and with a resolute sigh, she stepped away the door and began to shut it. And just before the latch caught, she remembered the vow she had made to herself to invite him over for Christmas, and feeling brave, especially after such a wonderful night, she opened the door again, prepared to run outside if need be to catch him before he left—

Only to find that he was still standing there.

"Oh! John, I—"

"Anna…" He was looking at her intensely, his eyes dark and deeply penetrating hers. Her breath caught in her throat as she stared back at him, and she was sure her heart paused as it waited to hear what he was going to say next. "I…I actually don't need to go."

Her eyes widened then. "Oh?"

"No…" he replied…and then without any further warning, his head leaned in…and Anna felt her eyes fluttered closed as she leaned up…and met his lips with her own.

It was gentle at first. Their lips rose and met one another, and for the briefest, most beautiful moment…that was all there was. Just a simple brush of lips. And John's were wonderful—smooth and warm and sweet. And then…the kiss began to deepen. And their lips began to move. John moved his first, and Anna quickly responded. And slowly…they both sighed their mouths open…and the kiss deepened even further, and Anna moaned as John's tongue gently teased her own.

He pulled his head away then, and Anna stood there, gasping and blushing and staring up at him. He looked back down at her, his own face flushed and his chest rising and falling with short breaths. But he didn't look sorry for the kiss…and she couldn't help but grin at this wonderful realization.

His arms then moved around her, and Anna moaned again as his mouth met hers, and this time there was no slow gentleness with the kiss, this time they were both desperately kissing one another. Anna's arms came up and entwined around Mr. Bates' neck, her fingers tangling in the dark strands of hair at the back of his head, pulling him closer, opening her mouth a little more, and deepening the kiss further. She gasped as she felt his body move closer to hers, but she didn't back away, nor did she stop the kiss. Oh God, this is wonderful! It's everything I dreamed and even better!

"Anna…" he moaned against her mouth, pulling her even closer. She heard a slam then, and realized that he had just kicked the door shut with his foot. He murmured something that sounded like an apology, and she giggled, before resuming her kissing. "Anna," he moaned again, his lips now falling along her jaw, to neck, causing her to whimper as they found a sensitive spot just under her ear. "Anna, I…I don't want to make you feel uncomfortable—"

"No," she interrupted, holding his face and bringing it back to her mouth to kiss. She held the kiss for a long, good moment, before releasing him and letting them both catch their breath. "No, you…you couldn't," she admitted, blushing brightly, but meaning every word. "I…I want you to."

He looked at her in such a way that she felt her heart melt at the love and tenderness she saw in his eyes. His hand moved to her cheek then, and he brushed a strand of hair from her face. "I want to, too," he admitted back. She smiled at this…oh God; she was positively beaming at this! Never in her wildest dreams had she imagined this happening! When she was fussing over her make-up and trying to decide what dress to wear. After so many years of pining, after weeks of trying to build up the courage to talk to him, to ask him to join her for a pint or a bite to eat. After the disappointment of last Christmas, when she arrived at the party, only to discover that the one she truly wanted to see wasn't there. After all these things happening…here he was, holding her, kissing her, and…and telling that he wanted stay with her. He wanted to stay the night with her.

"Wait," she panted, stopping him just before he leaned in to kiss her again. He pulled back suddenly and looked worried, like he had overstepped a line or that she was having second thoughts. "I um…I just need a second, alright?"

"Oh…of course," he said, his smile nervous, but understanding. She touched his cheek with tender, reverent fingers, before moving around a corner where she was out of sight. Once there…she kicked off her heels and literally began jumping up and down, her eyes squeezed shut and her head thrown back in blissful, joyful happiness. Alright, alright, get a hold of yourself! Don't keep the good man waiting!

"Ok!" she announced, returning to where he was.

He smiled, his face still red and his chest still panting. "Everything alright?"

"Yes, yes, everything is fine…" Oh it's more than fine, everything is WONDERFUL! "Um…yes, that's done, um…" get yourself together! Don't spoil this moment! "Um…will you give me…ten seconds?"

"Ten seconds?"

"Yes," she grinned, despite the blush on her cheeks. "Yes, um…meet me in there, in ten seconds," she pointed to a room just a few feet away.

John followed her gaze and then nodded his head. "Alright…starting now," he murmured, a bashful smile spreading across his face.

Anna silently squealed with glee, before rushing into the room she had pointed (her bedroom) and immediately began throwing all the discarded dresses she had been debating over, under her bed, as well as clearing anything else away that may look embarrassing. Once she was satisfied, she turned back towards the door…and just in time…because John was quietly entering the room.

He had removed his coat, she noticed. He was holding it in one hand…and paused in the doorway, as if waiting for her to let him in.

She rushed to him then, and threw herself against him. Hopefully that was all the invitation he would need. While they kissed, Anna felt his fingers move between them, tugging at his necktie, while her own helped him by shrugging his suit jacket off his shoulders. She began to work the buttons of his shirt, while he moved his hands around her back, searching for the zipper on her dress. "No, no, it's impossible to unzip," she confessed, pulling her mouth away momentarily. "Just…tug it."

"Tug it?" he questioned.

Anna nodded her head, and then bent down to lift the hem up, pulling the slip in the process. His hands quickly joined hers, and together with one mighty tug, pulled the dress up and over her head…leaving her standing there in nothing but her bra and knickers. Normally she would be feeling embarrassed at such exposure (no partner in her past would ever call her a "sexual goddess") but standing before John like this, she didn't feel awkward or uncomfortable. It just felt…right.

He stared at her, his eyes wide as he took her in, and his hands carefully moved up to frame her face, his fingers tangling in her hair and smoothing it back after pulling the dress up. "My God, Anna…" he breathed. "You're so beautiful…"

His words were her undoing. She leaned up on her tip toes and moaned against his mouth as he met hers again in a deep, sweet kiss. His arms moved around her, she practically purred at the feel of his fingers moving up and down the skin of her spine. She pressed her body closer, her own fingers now helping him remove his shirt and slide it down his shoulders—

A shrill ring suddenly filled the room. Anna's eyes opened, and so did John's. They both stared back at each other as another ring filled the air. And then another. John stepped away and muttered a curse under his breath, before moving to his coat, which he had dropped near the doorway, and picked it up and began rummaging through the pockets, before finding it at last.

"Hello?" he sighed, sounding very irritated, but also trying to sound understanding. "Yes, yes, go on…" he glanced at her and Anna quickly turned her head. It was amazing in a way that throughout the entire evening, during the party and the ride back to her flat, not once did his mobile ring. But now, right before they were about to fall upon her bed and fulfill all those dreams she had been having for so long…did it choose this moment to interrupt them. It could be worse, a voice in her brain chastised. At least it didn't happen while the two of you were—

"No…no, I don't think I will be able to get the Prime Minister on the phone tonight…or the Pope."

Anna turned back then and stared at John with confusion. What on earth? Who was he talking to?

"Please…please don't…" he sighed and continued listening, before speaking again. "I'll look into it in the morning, alright? I'll call you back then, ok?" A few more murmured words were spoken on the phone…and then finally he hung up. Anna bit her lip and glanced nervously back and forth between his face and the mobile he held in his hand. "I'm sorry," he sighed, putting the phone back inside the pocket of his coat.

"It's alright," she mumbled.

"No, it's not," he answered, his voice sounding very frustrated. He ran a hand through his hair and took a deep breath, closing his eyes as if summoning patience from somewhere deep within. "Anna…there's…there's something you should know…"

She swallowed, not sure she liked where this was going. She moved her arms to cover her chest, suddenly feeling very, very vulnerable.

"That…" he looked down at the coat where his phone now lay. "That was my ex-wife."

Anna felt as if someone had just punched her in the stomach. His ex-wife? He had been married? Not that that should be too surprising in this day and age, but…how was it possible she hadn't known this until now? And Robert had never mentioned anything about his friend being married…unless he didn't know?

"She…she calls you?" she whispered, her voice low and soft. "She's the one who's been ringing you…all this time?"

John sighed and nodded his head, looking down at his feet. "Yes. She…you see, she's not well," he lifted her eyes and met her gaze. That passionate longing she had seen earlier was completely gone. And now, all she saw was sadness. And bitterness. And pain. "Vera," he murmured, and Anna actually flinched at the mention of the name. "Vera, she…she's always struggled with depression," he explained. "I don't think our divorce helped; in fact, I think it made it much, much worse."

What was he trying to say? She wasn't sure she wanted to know.

"She's tried to kill herself, twice," he explained, his voice sounding raw and tired. "The last time it happened, her heart had stopped beating. And when she was revived, she kept crying and telling me over and over that she loved me…"

Anna's hand flew to her mouth then, and she could feel tears sting her eyes. She could also feel her own heart stop beating at this revelation.

"She's in an institution now," he explained. "Some days she's alright…but other days…" he sighed. "Other days, she's not so good. She has no family left, none at all. In a way…I'm all she has."

God this hurt. Everything about it hurt. With shaking fingers she reached for a robe that was lying on the base of her bed, and quickly picked it up to wrap around her body. She felt so cold and numb.

"Does she…does she think you're still married?"

"No," he answered very quickly. "No, no, she knows we're divorced," he tried to assure, but the truth was, Anna felt no assurance. John sighed and shook his head. "It's just…very complicated…" he looked up into her eyes, and her heart broke a little then. "Perhaps…too complicated."

Too complicated. She knew what that meant. And yet she didn't contradict him either. He had just revealed that he had an ex-wife who suffered from severe depression to the point where she had to be institutionalized for her well-being…and that he was all she had. If the days were good, maybe she didn't bother talking to him at all. But if the days were bad, she had a way of contacting him…and now it all made sense, the strange and constant phone calls. But this also meant that if the phone rang…he had to answer. She wouldn't expect anything less.

And as if on cue, the shrill ringtone filled the air once more. John sighed and hung his head. "Anna…I'm so sorry—"

"It's alright," she lied. "You should answer it; she probably needs you."

She didn't look at him then. It hurt too much to look. She simply put on a smile, hoping it looked genuine and full of understanding, and tied the robe around her waist. She picked her dress up off the floor, and went into her closet to hang it up once again, lingering a little longer than necessary.

She heard him answer, finally. And she heard his voice begin to grow distant, as well as his footsteps. She peeked outside the closet and saw that his suit jacket, tie, and coat had been picked up. Then, she heard the sound of the door to her flat shutting. And she knew then, that he had truly left.

And that was when the tears began to fall. Softly at first…and then in quick, heavy waves. Soon she was sobbing, her face contorted and her hands balled into fists, beating her sides as her heart and mind berated herself for letting him walk away. But what else could she do? It was clear that he belonged to another. It was clear that she would have to settle for a dream.

In another part of London, another woman was also crying, but silently, so as not to wake the man beside her.

Cora turned from her back onto her side, and hastily tried to wipe the tears away from her cheeks. I'm being foolish; I'm making mountains out of mole hills. I'm letting feelings of inadequacy rule my brain! She kept berating herself over and over, and yet she couldn't stop wondering…and worrying.

They hadn't danced that night. She and Robert never had the opportunity to dance. If she weren't making small talk with various members of his staff, he was too busy doing the same. And everywhere he seemed to go…Jane was only a few feet away. Jane was fetching him drinks. Jane was bringing him food. At one point, Cora swore she saw Jane lean in with a napkin and wipe her husband's chin! Yes…Jane seemed to be doing more than just playing the part of "faithful secretary"…she seemed to be ready to step in and play a part far too close to Cora's heart.

And yet she didn't feel she could talk about these worries, these feelings of jealousy. She knew Robert would deny them and try to tell her that she had nothing to worry about. And in the end, she did feel she had nothing to worry about. She knew he loved her, she knew that deep in her soul. But…even so, to see another woman, a younger and very pretty woman like Jane, fawn over Robert the way she had…and to see that Robert clearly saw nothing wrong with it, or that he didn't think it looked like what it looked like to Cora…that hurt so much.

But really, who could she talk to about these things? No one, and certainly not her own daughters. No…she would have to conquer these feelings on her own.

Cora wiped her face again, and pulled the blankets even closer to her chin, curling up as tightly as she could into a ball, and tried to concentrate on the sounds of her husband's soft snores to lull her back asleep.

To be continued...

I know, this one was sad :o( BUT HANG IN THERE!