Raven had visited her several times. Clarke had done so only once, more for a check up than anything else. The rest of her time is spent alone. She supposes she should count herself lucky that nothing worse had happened. It hadn't gone down well with everyone but it had placated most of them. Maybe she should, but she doesn't blame them for reacting towards her the way they did. The Arks strict regime had them locked up for mostly petty crimes, curtailing their freedom. To top it all off the council had gambled with their lives, children, without giving them a choice. It would piss anyone off. She had just been in the wrong place at the wrong time, an easy target to vent their anger at. When the crowd had gathered outside that tent that first day, there had been a couple of shouts to kill her. Bellamy had countered, proposing that imprisoning her would be a much more fitting punishment for her crimes. Cheers had greeted his suggestion, the crowd chanting "lock her up". Nicole had felt so vulnerable in those moments. Raven had tried to keep her spirits high by telling her exactly what she thought of those outside. She had started by calling the mob "stupid kids" and Bellamy "Jaha 2.0" and her insults had only gotten more inventive from there. It had kept her from hearing exactly what was being said outside of the tent but she knows they hadn't specified the length of her 'prison term'. As soon as the crowd had dispersed Clarke had brought her up to the third floor of the Ark, the others leaving to search for the radio Bellamy has tossed.
After Clarke had apologised to her, she had told her that Bellamy had her safety in mind when he had spoken to the group. That his idea was to give them time to get used to her and to let them feel like they're being vindicated. She wonders if Bellamy actually said all that or if Clarke was trying to make her feel better. Even if he had said something along those lines, she figures he had only said it to placate Clarke. Bellamy aside, she does sympathise more with the hundred since she's been locked up. She knows now what it's like to be trapped in a confined space, though she has more room to live in then they had. It's only been about a day and a half but she's already feeling a little less than sane, enough that she has played multiple games of eye spy with herself. There's nothing to do except sleep but that's been hard to come by.
Waverly had spent so many years like this without going mad. At least she had something to read.
The impulse to smile at the image of the first time she saw Waverly fades. It hurts to think about her. To think about how she looked at her, eyes filled with a wild violence and an expression of wounded resentment. A destructive force voicing her feelings of betrayal and hurling bitter insults. Some of her accusations had been warranted. Nicole had been naive to think Waverly would have welcomed her with open arms after keeping the truth from her, but the depth of Waverly's fury had seemed a bit excessive. Maybe Nicole is just trying to find excuses to ease her own guilt. The fact that Waverly is alive brings her some comfort.
"I could have died...Did I mean so little to you?"
The words burn and bite her. Words that haven't left her from the moment they escaped from Waverly's lovely mouth. They live on buried deep under her skin, entwined with the heavy guilt that already exists inside her. She lets her head fall into her hands and asks herself for what is probably the hundredth time what she can do to make it up to Waverly.
If she lets me.
Nicole allows herself a moment to remember how good Waverly had looked. The ground suited her. She had been full of energy, vibrant. The sun had brightened her skin, expelling the paleness. Her hair had been loose and had looked so silky. She had looked even more beautiful than on the Ark, even with the anger that had fired out of her. Waverly's dislike of covering her stomach hadn't changed, the smooth expanse of skin on display, inviting her to imagine how soft it would be to run her fingers over it.
A resounding crack sounds in the distance, making her jerk in surprise. Five seconds later it's followed by noise she hasn't heard before.
What the fuck was that... Grounders?
It sounded somewhat similar to the metal drums they had played with on the Ark, blended with the roar of the explosions she had heard in the pod. It vibrates through the very floor she's sitting on. If it's a weapon it had to be a big one.
There's another louder boom, closer to the ship. Like the last time it's followed by the same rambling, rumbling sound but louder, as if hundreds of rocks are smashing and sliding off each other. She speculates on what sort of weapon could cause such a racket. Raven had told her about the grounders, mentioning they had nearly killed some Jasper kid. It sounds crazy that there's people already on earth, people who's ancestors had survived the nuclear apocalypse. Although judging by their actions so far, the Grounders don't want them here. She figures that worse is still to come.
Not that I can help in here.
Her feelings of uselessness return. She's exhausted, haunted by her failures and scared of what her future held. She had taken on responsibilities that now lie lifeless and incomplete. Three hundred and twenty lives lost so far, their plan foiled by a scared moron and one broken radio. Raven had told her there is a chance of fixing it but hadn't filled her in on an actual plan yet.
It seems an age since she had interrupted Raven and Abbey's conversation on the Ark. Raven had been abrasive the first time they'd met, portraying herself as tough and cocky. Subsequently Raven had shown herself to be loyal, kind, supportive and just generally fun to be with. She's the only one who cares enough to bring her water or food. She also the only one who escorts her outside so she doesn't have to piss in the cracked bucket that currently sits in the corner opposite her. There had been some opposition to the trips but Raven had berated them into allowing it.
Nicole freezes as soft taps begin from outside of the ship. They increase in number as the seconds roll past, enough that they are no longer audible as singular taps. Instead it's a muted pattering draping over the walls and roof of the room she's in. It develops into a rhythmic pounding, as though there are many people outside hammering lightly at the hull. It's not the only sound coming from the exterior. Subdued shouts are discernible and the curiously soothing rhythms change as a strong wind howls. She hears another crack and the accompanying crashing and clattering a few seconds later. She wonders again what exactly is going on outside, sighing to herself. Deciding to convert her nervous energy into something constructive, she gets onto the floor, counting her press ups out loud. She barely gets to twenty when her stomach growls in protest. It's hard to hear it over the noise but she can feel it. Raven hasn't visited in several hours. She wonders if the sounds outside have anything to do with it. She hopes they're all okay.
Especially Waverly.
When she had told her to fuck off, Nicole could hardly believe it. Once, Waverly had used frick in front of her after knocking over a glass. It had been adorable and about as close as she got to the word 'fuck'. It indicates how big the rift is between them now. She misses that flirting, playful banter between them. Who knew if they could get back to it. She would settle for anything right now, any sort of friendship with her. She doesn't think she's ever wanted something so badly, this profound need for Waverly to forgive her, to not hate her. She knows that it's absurd but really everything in her life right now is fairly absurd.
The way she had looked at her it had left no room for forgiveness. It's such a contrast, Waverly on the Ark and Waverly on the ground. Her thoughts keep returning to Waverly, it's like she wants to punish herself, give Waverly her retribution. Or maybe she's just bored. Either way it's only going to speed up a descent into depression so she tries to turn her focus to anything else, wishing for someone to open the hatch. Every way her mind turns it finds only negative matter. Her usual confidence is deserting her leaving in it's place a quiet desperation. She clings to the one bright spot in her life, Raven. Their friendship is in their early days but she's the only person Nicole can rely on, and she's honest. Nicole remembers times when Raven would be better saying a lot less, there is such a thing as too much truth. The lack of tact aside, she prefers someone who says things to her face rather than behind her back. She is the source of all Nicole's information whether it's about the grounders or the camp. Raven had tried to broach the subject of Waverly with Nicole but she didn't know what to say. Instead she had turned the questions on Raven, asking her about Finn. When Raven had confided in her about him acting weird, Nicole had listened carefully, agreeing with Raven even though she doesn't really know Finn and has no clue if he is acting strange. Raven had told her that she would see what she meant when she got out of this "shithole". She had tried to comfort Nicole saying she'd be out of here in no time "Less than a week, two max." Two weeks in here and she'll go mad. She would prefer Raven's puns to this.
Thud!
Her eyes snap to the hatch as it flips back and she hopes it's Raven. Jumping up she watches as a soaked Bellamy is followed by four lads dragging a tall, limp, bound body between them.
"What's going on?"
One of the them gives her a cheeky answer."You're going to be sharing your cell from now on inmate." He's a small blond kid, with whom she's had dealings with before. The skybox wasn't one of her usual positions but she had completed a two week rotation as part of her training. She remembers this guy as he had not been the easiest to deal with.
Is his name Drew?
She finally gets a clear view of the figure they had been carrying. Its's a man who's covered in tattoos, dirt and blood. He's definitely not one of the hundred.
A grounder?
Another loud crack outside prompts her to ask "What the hell is that outside?" They laugh at her while Bellamy smiles wryly.
"It's just a storm."
They were taught about storms and weather on the Ark but she had never thought she'd experience such events. Of course she had imagined what it would be like on earth when she was a kid, everyone had. She wishes she could be outside to watch the spectacle. The boys are surrounding the grounder, three ready in case he woke up and one cutting through his restraints. Curiousity laced with dread prompts her to walks closer to Bellamy who's watching the operation shrewdly and ask him "Have you thought whatever this is through?"
"This is none of your business."
"Well since you've brought this 'business' in here, it's going to be very hard for me to not be involved. Since you won't let me leave and all."
The blonde lackey hands Bellamy back the knife he'd borrowed, sneering at Nicole. When there's no response from Bellamy she gives it another try.
"I'm going to hear everything anyway."
The blond kid snaps, stalking the few steps it takes to reach Nicole and getting in her face. "You heard the man, shut the fuck up."
"Just because I'm in here doesn't mean I have to listen to shit heads like you."
"Leave it out Drew" Bellamy warns him, proving her guess of his name right.
"But she's being disrespectful towards us."
She sees the moment Drew realises just how much she towers over him and how she's not afraid in the slightest. He must have been used to people who took his threats seriously.
"Go on then" she goads him. It's too late for him to pretend he's backing down to appease Bellamy but he tries anyway. "Fine Bellamy."
"Tie him tighter. The last thing we need is this bastard getting free because you screwed up." As the words leave Bellamy's mouth, the hatch opens again, a figure climbing in, only her back and long black hair visible to Nicole.
"Octavia, get out of here."
Octavia Blake, the girl who lived under the floor. There wasn't a soul on the Ark who hadn't heard the story. Octavia and Bellamy don't look as if they are one big happy family, beginning to fiercely exchange words.
"I told you he was protecting me. You didn't have to do this. "
"This isn't about you. I'm doing this for all of us."
Nicole has no idea what's going on and shifts her concentration to her surroundings, taking in small details. Octavia's cuts on her head and face. Bellamy's clenched jaw, a vein in his neck throbbing. The boredom on one of the boys faces. The man tied up behind Bellamy and Octavia who's watching them intently. More often that not his gaze falls on Octavia. He looks worried, which is only natural given his situation.
"You don't know that! We need to know what we're up against. How many there are and why they're killing us. And he's gonna tell us right now. "
Killing us?
"No, Bellamy, please." Octavia grabs his hand pleading with him but he brushes her off and with a wave of of his hand beckons to his soldiers. There's that look in Bellamy's eyes again, the one that she couldn't decipher in the forest. She thinks now that it's a mix of raw pain and dismal anger.
"Miller, get her out of here."
Bellamy walks towards the prisoner while Miller and Drew grab Octavia.
"I was there! I - Hey, get get off of me!" Before Nicole has a chance to interfere, Octavia has pushed the two boys off and has begun to walk away. She turns back to Bellamy to utter a final attempt to stop him. Nicole sees the grounder's head move so his vision of Octavia is not restricted.
"I don't even think he speaks English. He won't understand you."
Bellamy doesn't bother to turn to acknowledge Octavia. Instead he takes a step to the tied up figure and says "Oh, I think he will."
There's a long moment of silence before Bellamy asks his first question.
"What's your name?"
He tries another.
"Where's your camp?"
A longer pause this time.
"How many of you are there?"
When this question goes unanswered, Bellamy strikes him in the face.
"Woah there! You can't do that, he can't even defend himself."
Fairness and doing the right thing were two concepts Nicole had grown up with, her dad instilling them in her. He always said that people are innocent until proven guilty. As she walks closer to the man she can see new blood on his face, dripping off his chin.
"Shut up and sit down or we'll tie you up too." Bellamy is glaring at her but she's not that easily put off. "I'm trying to keep you out of trouble" he says in a lower voice so the others can't hear.
"This is you helping me? I'd hate to see what your idea of not helping me is."
He changes tactic at her fiery reply. "His people have already killed some of our people. Maybe you don't care because they're criminals, but down here we look after our own." Why he thinks being even more a dick is going to change her mind is a mystery to her.
"I'm not going to stand by while you torture the guy."