First I wanted to give all of you guys a huge thank you. It is an overwhelming pleasure to read all your reviews and see the interest in this story. I really feel all the love and support you are sending not only with your comments and follows but with every single view! Thank you!
The second thing that I wanted to say is that I know that you guys are used to my rather fast updates but I am going on vacation so my next update might take a little longer. I just wanted to address that so that you wouldn't think that I gave up on the story if my update wouldn't come as soon as you would hope for. But, I promise you, if I will be able I will update soon till then I hope you will enjoy this chapter.
I am sending you all so much love and hope you are having an awsome Summer! - Monrose
People say that when you experience a tragic accident your whole life flashes in front of your eyes. A little tragic movie filled with memories you watch that posses your mind and heart and make you realize the beauty of the world you might leave suddenly behind. Will Traynor could have easily proved you wrong, the only thing flashing in front of his eyes two and half years ago were bright yellow lights. After that everything turned dark and silence. There were no visions from childhood memories or family vacations, nothing about his hiking trips, bike tours through the country with friends, skydiving or bungee jumping, no Alicia neither any other women he spend the night with, and trust me, there were many of them. It was pitch black dark. A blank space filled with nothing. A sudden hollow emptiness that made you aware that you are not the king of this world yet just a passing figure through this cosmos and there was nothing that would have been able to prepare you for it. But perhaps that tragic accident wasn't tragic enough. Not as painfully troubled or gloriously sickening to the grievously damage that it was preparing you for, not even closely comparable to the tragic of seeing the love of his life holding the hands of another man. In front of his eyes flashed all the beautiful and less beautiful memories he shared with Clark, from her first entrance to the annex till their first kiss at the beach. He relived all six painfully beautiful months all at once right there in front of a shabby caffe in Staithes experiencing a mixture of contrasting reactions through every pore of his body. She was sitting on the other side, happy and carefree, smiling, holding hands. So close, yet so far away.
Many times they hospitalized him because of various viruses and infections, pain and even minor body malfunction, every time there is a certain moment when the doctors come up to you and ask a question that seems so simple and insignificant, even meaningless, a question that concerns your pain level. ''Please Mr. Traynor'' they would say ''would you mind to share your pain level from 1 till 10 with us''. Will hated that question from the bottom of his heart. Pain was pain, did it matter which level you thought it was. So, he answered mostly with a ''9'', now he knew why. Because the pain he experienced now was nothing to the one the thought he felt before. It was closer to a 100 than to a 9. There were indeed different levels of pain, he was just lucky enough to be spared from this till now.
''Let's go home'' he silently said to Nathan.
''Are you insane, Will? We didn't come this far just to vanish without even trying'' He couldn't sympathize to Wills reaction. ''She is right there, she deserves to know the truth! You two deserve a chance''
''Don't you understand, Nathan. She is happy. Look at her sitting there with her stripy legs living a peaceful life without any worries. No man in wheelchair who can anchor her down from the opportunities of what this life can give you'' Will was determent.
''William Traynor, if you want go inside, I will. This is pure madness just because another insignificant man is holding her damn hand you are willing to let go just like that'' Nathan stepped forward.
''Nathan, if you have ever been my friend you will stop right now'' Nathan reluctantly turned around ''This is bigger than a silly man holding what I foolishly claimed as mine. Without me she is better off, look what she has done without me as a burden to her. She moved to another city, found work, maybe even love, who knows. And in a near future when she get more comfortable she will leave this place too and claim the world as her own, just as I always wanted her to do. I am not letting go. No, I am setting free something that has never even belonged to me. I was just either to scared of my own destiny or to blindly in love to realize that'' Warm tears fell down his face. His voice silenced into a soft whisper ''She has to go through her own journey without anyone standing in her way''
''That is a decision that she should make for herself'' Nathan voice raised in rage.
''No, that is a decision I am making for her because her beautiful selfless nature wouldn't ever allow her to do that, so I am doing it for her'' Will rolled his wheelchair up the street ''And you will support me because that is an order not a request''
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A dark presence was lurking in the shadow of the little alley eavesdropping the conversation of the two strange men that appeared out of nowhere in the little town named Staithes. She saw them from the distance when she headed her way towards the parking to her car. A tall man and a man in a wheelchair, something you don't see every day in a place like this. They were definitely looking like they were out of place. She decided to follow them when the two men stopped her to ask for directions to a caffe named The Shabby Mug. Her caffe.
If she didn't knew better she could have sworn that this men was Louisa Clarks Will Traynor. But she should have known better, the men named Will Traynor was dead, unable to move his body even while he was still a part of the living, at least that is what Louisa Clark told her. This man was rolling his chair and gesticulating with his hands during his conversation like it was the most natural thing in the world, so she was certain it was just a very strange coincidence but when the tall man with a heavy Australian accent addressed him several times as ''Will'', she thought her old ears where playing a trick with her. She stayed in a secure distance behind them and hid in the alley when they arrived next to the caffe. What followed was a heartbreaking conversation that left her in a state of clash. She stayed in the comforting darkness of the alley while watching the men disappear in the distance. Inside her was building up a huge lump of conflict that she was able to brush of easily cause she knew what was the right thing to do. So she opened the door of her little caffe and gave Kyle and Louisa a serious stare.
''Kyle you should leave now'' she said.
The young man, scared by Frannies tone, stood up as fast as he could. On his way out he managed to gave her a quick courtesy for goodbye cause words were unable to come out of his mouth from the discomfort he felt from the situation.
Louisa stared at Frannie in confusion, she wasn't used to see her like that, especially not throwing out costumers. ''I am sorry, Frannie, I accidently broke a glass and hurt myself, he was just helping me''
Frannie wasn't even listening, she just had to get this out before this would get to hard. After all, she learned to love that silly girl with her unusual clothes ''Louisa, you are fired''
''What? Why?'' Louisa practically yelled at her because of the shock that overcame her from Frannies words.
''You have to go back home, girl. It is time. I have let you hide out here for a month and I think it is out of big importance for you to head back home now'' This was more difficult for Frannie than she thought it would be ''I will drive you to the train station''
''Frannie, what is going on here. This is my home now. Why are you throwing me out like this?'' Louisa thought Frannie was playing a bad joke with her.
''I am not throwing you out. I am trying to help you. You have to go back to your family and deal with your demons. If things don't turn out the way we both hope they will, you will always have a place here but for now, you have to leave.''
''Frannie... Please... Don't do this'' Louisa begged.
''I have shown your more than enough courtesy and I think you can return me the favor by listening what I am telling you to do. It is the best thing that you can do at this moment. If things get out of hand in any kind of way, you can always come back''
Louisa couldn't fight that argument, Frannie has shown her more courtesy than she deserved. Without her she wouldn't have been able to survive this journey called Staithes. She was her rock and leaving this place that she managed to made a home off to a place where she would have to fight her demons was something she thought she would be able to avoid for at least a little while longer.
She gave Frannie a sad nod as approval to her words.
''Good, now go up and pack your stuff'' Frannie demanded.
''I have to clean up the shattered pieces of the glass''
''No, girl, go up and pack, Ill clean up here''
While Louisa was upstairs packing her stuff, Frannie cleaned up the broken pieces of the glass. She was unable to tell her what she overheard earlier. It wasn't her place to do, but she could at least point her to the right direction. She was a strong women with a life full of experience behind her, people came and leave her life, at first it was hard, but with time it got easier but this girl with her strange clothes was something special. She will be a missing piece, a bright spot of bliss in a world full of gaps. A tear fell down her face mourning for the friend she will lose in order to give her the best chance aside the man she thought was long gone.
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This was a bad Idea. This was a very bad Idea. A huge mistake. I can still go and leave. Nobody saw me. I can still run as fast as I can away from here. Just leave. No one will knew I was even here.
Louisa Clark almost threw up while standing in front of the house with her big yellow suitcase that she took with her on her journey nearly a month ago. Her hand that was covered in a band aid from the cut she earned yesterday was hurting from the heavy bag that she was juggeling from one hand to the other on her walk here. 15 minutes passed and she wasn't able to get in. Her stomach was twisting and turning the food that Frannie prepared for her nearly 5 hours ago before she took her to the station. She vanished out of another town in the darkness of the night just like she vanished from this one.
I am going to throw up. I can't do this. I will just turn around and leave like nothing happened. Like I was never here. I should have at least left this damn suitcase at home before I came here, now I will have to drag it the whole way back. Okay, I will leave now. Why am I not leaving. Why am I still standing here.
It was 7:55 in the morning and Louisa Clark stood like stone with a raising heart in front of the Traynor residence. Her body wasn't cooperating with her. When she left the train, she thought it was a good Idea to first go to the Traynors house. She thought she owed it to Camilla and Steven to give them her condolence. After all she left them alone in that situation, she didn't even wanted to imagine how they felt accompanying their son to Switzerland. She didn't had to imagine, she knew how it felt. She also wanted to get over with this as soon as possible, deal with her demons, to put it in Frannies words, before she was to terrified to go through with it. So she just stood there, in Camillas carefully taken care of garden trying to move her legs to either take a step closer to the door and ring the bell or to run away. Neither one of those options sounded good so she just stood there hoping to be able to keep her food in. The thought of stepping in that house where all the memories where filled with Will, where he lived in every piece of furniture, in every picture on the wall, in every delicately picked out piece of decoration, was an unbearable heartache. In a way she even wanted to go inside and feel his spirit through the house, feel one more time close to him, breath in the air he was breathing in when he was living in the house. But the memories were to bitter for a fragile heart like hers. So she just stood there with a panic in her heart and a conflict in her soul when the big elegant door opened and to her surprise a tired looking Nathan almost tackled her down. No words came out of him, just a shockingly looking stare. No words came out of her either, she kept staring at him with the same confusion as he did at her.
Just when she tried to regain her ability to speak and ask him why he is still visiting the Traynors house, her mind played a game with her.
Great, now not only am I incapable to move myself from the spot I glued myself standing in for the past 20 minutes but I am going crazy too.
Will Traynor rolled up behind Nathan evenly tired looking like his friend and carer. It felt like hours passed while she kept staring with a wide open jaw at this shabby looking ghost that represented Will Traynor in her mind. She knew it was a bad Idea to come here but she didn't know it was this bad. Going crazy bad.
But when the ghost in a tone a little louder than a whisper said ''Clark'' she was certain that this was no ghost. She was not crazy. This was her Will Traynor right in front of her. Could it really be? Words where not able to come out of her, a desperate attempt to find her voice, reach towards him ended in a madness inside her. Her head was spinning, her stomach was turning, she desperately wanted to step forward but her feet lost the ability to stand, she collapsed, right there in Camillas garden. Camilla will be so mad if I destroyed any of her flowers, what a silly thought she was thinking about before she lost her conscious and everything in front of her went black.