A/N: Here we are again. I have to say that I got tired of waiting for those 230 reviews and decided to post this. I realized there was a flaw in the system – you see, the people who were nice and reviewed and always review are getting punished because other people apparently just can't be bothered. But really I don't mind. I loved all the reviews and apologize for the long wait. So, moral to the story is: thanks so much for your reviews, the always manage to somehow brighten my day, so keep them coming! And here is chapter ten (we're making progress!). Don't you love the title:)

Disclaimer: I'm not J.K. Rowling. I'm actually a Ravenclaw witch going into my seventh year at Hogwarts.

o o o

Chapter X: Ten Ways to Kill a Ghost

I picked the girl's bathroom on the second floor, the one that no one ever uses, to cool down in. I ran in, the door snapping shut behind me, and collapsed onto the floor by the sinks, my dress spreading around me in a black jumble. And it was only then that I noticed that there where tears falling down my cheeks. I buried my face into my hands, trying to forget reality.

Which, it turns out, is actually really hard.

The silence was only disturbed by the ever present boom that resonated like a pulse through the castle and the constant drip of water from the circle of sinks. If I wouldn't have been so upset, so confused I would have probably been frightened at the eerie quiet that reigned. But things being as they were I didn't care. Until I heard the loud flush from my right.

"My, my, my. A poor little girl crying on the bathroom floor," a voice spoke up in a sorrowful hiccup.

I was too tired to be startled. I didn't even bother to lift my face, instead speaking through my hands, the only answer I could think of, my voice muffled, "I am not crying."

The voice tutted slightly, this time closer to me, "Liar."

Then voice had the audacity to giggle.

I couldn't help but look up. Only to find myself face to face with a ghost.

I felt my eyes widen and I pressed myself against the wall behind me. Ghosts certainly have a way to scare you. Especially when they are always portrayed in child tales as vengeful spirits in search of revenge. Never really got over that.

And Nearly-Headless Nick wasn't really much help either.

The ghost, who looked like a girl not that much younger than me, suddenly frowned, an insulted look on her face.

"You look a lot worse than I do! It's because I'm dead, right? That's why you're staring at me!" the dead girl wailed, trailing off in a jumble lost to her cries.

I should have felt sympathy for her, but I only felt insulted.

"I do not look bad!" I said defensively.

The ghost shut up, a smile spreading on her face, "Yes, you do."

I scampered to my feet, trying my best not to trip over the hem of my dress, while ghost girl, or shall we call her G-squared, giggled contently. Casting her a glare I looked at myself in the mirror.

I did look bad; my tears had ruined my entire makeup. The white was stripped with black tear lines and my crimson lipstick was spread out and distorted. Great. Now I felt even better.

I turned on the sink and let it fill up, ghost girl having a fine time behind me.

"Ugly little girl, crying in the bathroom. What happened? Myrtle doesn't know!" she sang happily.

I plunged my face into the full sink, letting myself just enjoy the warm water. Unfortunately for me, my lung capacity isn't eternal. I wish I had some gillyweed with me.

Sigh.

"Covered in makeup, dressed like a witch, the ugly girl cries, and Myrtle doesn't know why!" she continued singing, flying in cheerful circles around the sink.

I will now take the time to mention that her songs had no beat and the lyrics were really poor. I grabbed some soap and began rubbing the makeup off my face.

"What an ugly dress, mine is a lot prettier," she suddenly said.

I whirled around.

"You're wearing school robes!" I cried out, outraged.

She smirked at me, "They are still prettier than that," she grimaced, "rag."

I turned around and concentrated on rubbing the stubborn makeup off my face. Rag? Excuse me, but my dress is definitely not a rag. In fact, if I remember correctly, which I am sure I do, my dress is an exclusive designer dress. So there.

"An ugly girl, who wishes she was pretty, wears a rag, and hopefully a paper bag!" she resumed singing her bad lines.

Too bad you can't cuff a ghost.

She flew up and down, "Why is she ugly? Why is she wearing a rag? Myrtle doesn't know!"

I threw the soap away (I recommend this as a great and proven method to relieve stress caused by an excessively annoying ghost) and washed my face free of all the makeup. Then, I analyzed my face in the mirror. Yup, all the makeup was gone; I looked like normal Lily Evans once more. I turned around and faced the girl, grinning.

"So, am I still ugly?" I asked her.

The ghost narrowed her eyes in thought and spoke softly to herself before answering.

"Yes," she quipped.

I glared daggers at her, and for a second time thought that it was a true pity that you can't cuff a ghost. Maybe if you tried to drown her…

She suddenly smirked.

And I have to say; I didn't like it one bit.

"It was a boy, wasn't it?" she simpered, nodding in approval to her own question.

I have decided that the world has suddenly decided that it hates me.

"No, of course not!" I cried out.

Then, in the silence that fell after my words, we heard a voice calling my name, "Lily? LILY?"

Proof that the world hates me. The girl started laughing, pleased with herself. She didn't know my name, but I guess she could tell from my expression that it was me to whom the voice was referring to. What is James doing in the castle looking for me? Isn't he supposed to be at the dance?

That is when dear Miss I-am-a-dead-ghost-that-should-die-again had an absolutely brilliant idea.

She started screaming at the top of her lungs, her moaning voice echoing off the walls, "SHE'S IN THE GIRL'S BATHROOM! SHE'S IN THE GIRL'S BATHROOM! SHE'S RIGHT HERE! IN THE GIRL'S BATHROOM! THE ONE ON THE SECOND FLOOR!"

I started waving my hands around hysterically, trying to make her shut up, but she only smirked at me, thrilled with her actions, the evil girl, and continued screaming out my position. Maybe if I tackled her…I wonder if you can break a ghost's bones…

"LILY?" James called. Judging by his voice he was right outside the door.

A placement that didn't last very long, as he promptly barged into the bathroom.

"Lily! Where have you been?" he said upon seeing me.

"James! Get out! This is a girl's bathroom! You can't be in here!" I argued, throwing my hands in the air. The key word in the phrase being girl's. Because, ladies and gentlemen, James is a boy.

Miss I-hate-Lily-and-will-make-her-life-a-living-hell decided to speak up at that moment, "No, that's okay, you can come in when you want, James."

How did she know his name? Oh, wait, I just said his name.

James looked up at ghost girl and forced a smile on his face, "Myrtle, how are you doing?"

Right. Let's have a conversation with a dead person, that's always jolly.

Myrtle flew over to James, her eyes bright behind her glasses, "Oh, James, I'm so lonely. Why haven't you been visiting me? You used to come so often."

I had to fight really hard to contain my grin. I mean: a ghost in love with James Potter? This is probably the most absurd thing I have ever seen.

James didn't miss a beat, "It's been hard, Myrtle. It is my last year, and there are a lot of things I have to do."

Myrtle seemed crestfallen at his words, sniffing at bit.

I wonder if ghosts can die of sorrow. Quick, I need to think of something really sad. Maybe I can tell her a story about a poor orphan all alone, outside in the cold…

"James, why can't you kill yourself and become a ghost like me? We would be so happy," Myrtle pressed, her annoying hiccup voice hopeful.

This must be the equivalent of a marriage proposal in ghost language.

How touching, can I be the maid of horror?

No really, just who does she think she is?

"Myrtle, you know I can't do that," James told her kindly.

Shut down for Myrtle. I can't help but be suddenly happy.

"Is it because of that girl?" Myrtle suddenly asked, pointing an accusing finger at me.

Oh no, nobody is dragging me into any weird love conversations with a sadistic, depressed ghost.

"Myrtle, I've liked her for a very long time," James explained, trying to be sympathetic.

But, that wasn't good enough for our very special ghost. Myrtle began to scream and moan in agony, her shrilly voice echoing everywhere. I clapped my hands over my ears, trying to protect the fragile cilia in my ear; I don't plan on losing my hearing at the tender age of seventeen.

"MYRTLE, I DIDN'T MEAN TO OFFEND YOU!" James called out, trying to be heard over the ear-splitting screams.

The girl flew over to James, stopping only inches from his face, "Well, you did," she spat, her lower lip trembling.

And then she promptly screeched and charged at me. I couldn't help but scream in surprise, and maybe a little in terror, at seeing a dead person, in the form of a flying ghost coming at me full force. I tried to step back, but only managed to strip over my dress (this dress is starting to become slightly infuriating) and fall back on the floor. A weird sensation went through me, like ice cold water, making a shudder run up my spine.

"Myrtle! Leave her alone!" James came over, helping me up to my feet.

No one gives orders to Moaning Myrtle. She rushed back towards me, I screamed again, and she ran through me again; the only difference between the two times is that this time I attempted to hide behind James (to no avail; ghosts have amazingly great aim), and that the sensation intensified.

"Myrtle! Stop!" James's voice was firmer.

"I'M GOING TO TEAR HER TO PIECES!" Myrtle moaned.

Why me? Wasn't James the one who hurt her feelings?

I had to say something, "I'd like to see you TRY!"

An act, which, of course, only resulted in making her angrier. I have a talent for that.

James took out this wand, blue light appearing out of the end. Then something really weird happened. Myrtle ran through us both, me and James, and the world started spinning. Everything was off focus. The bathroom was disappearing, replaced by a mix of colors.

Spinning.

Faster and faster.

I grabbed on to the only stable thing in the spinning whirlwind of colors. Which happened to be James.

Faster and faster.

I was getting really dizzy, and I hugged James tighter, willing the world to stop.

And that's just what it did.

The world stopped.

And we fell, screaming, into the black abyss.

o o o

Hint: Where could they have fallen? Hm…suspense…

A/N: A nice official cliffhanger. Where did they go? Are they alright? Did Myrtle manage to kill them? Is this the end? We will have to see. He he he. I am so evil. Therefore: please review; the more reviews the faster I update. Just drop off a comment, or two, if you are in a generous mood. ;) And don't forget the three Rs: review, review and review! Have a fantastic Friday!