Disclaimer: I still don't own Naruto or any of the people/places found in his home world.

Author's Note: I am so so so so so so sorry that this is so so so so so so late, but I have a very good reason. A few weeks ago, my mom missed a few steps (we're not sure how many) walking down the stairs in our house and sprained her foot. Not her ankle. Her foot, and incredibly badly at that. She still can't put any weight on it at all. Doctor's orders. Several doctors' orders, in fact. It's been x-ray-ed, MRI-ed, and probably anything else that can be done to it, and luckily there are no broken bones. It's just a really really really baaaad sprain. Thus, my brother and I had to do pretty much everything around the house that she usually did (cook, clean, etc.), plus some. For the first couple of weeks, I had to help my mom get dressed and take a shower. Thank God we added on a handicapped-accessible guest suite when we built the house (just in case our grandparents came to live with us or something), so she didn't have to brave the stairs to do most stuff. Still, it left little to no time for me to sit down and write (between caring for her and going to work), because as soon as I would sit down and get into the mindset of what I had already gotten done (re-reading and such), she would need me to get her something or whatnot. Thus, I wasn't able to get any headway with this until I moved back in to college. I had a little help from the real Kaitlyn with parts of this, and it turned out differently than what I had originally planned, but I'm still pleased with how it turned out. Hopefully the following chapters will be back on a proper time table and such now that I have a bit more me-time and all. Anyway, here you go. Enjoy!

Chapter 12: Rule Number one

KAITLYN

Like a rollercoaster ride,

Holding on white knuckled

Like whoa, whoa - whoa, whoa

-Aly & AJ ("Like Whoa")

Despite the brief interruption from some freak lightning storm, I sleep rather well. With only one exception, though . . . I expect to wake up happily in Gaara's arms, but he's gone by the time I do actually break free from sleep. Instead of awakening to the sight of my personal red-headed Kazekage, I wake up to Temari shaking my shoulder and telling me I have to get up and get dressed now.

Grumbling, I do as she says and groggily pull on the clothes that she thrusts into my hands. Almost as soon as I'm dressed, she snatches up my hand and practically drags me out of the room. I stumble, doing my best to keep up as she starts talking to me. I'm well aware that she's speaking, but I can't seem to concentrate on the words enough to understand them.

When we reach the front door, Temari stops and shakes me by my shoulders. "Are you even listening to me?"

I blink at her. "Huh?"

Temari sighs, rolls her eyes, and snatches a steaming mug from Kankuro. "Give me that." She pushes it into my hands, despite his objections. "Drink this."

The smell of the dark brown liquid is unmistakable. Coffee! Kankuro eyes me warily. "Are you sure that's a good idea?" he asks.

"We need her awake and alert," Temari answers. She looks back at me. "Drink up. We have to go."

I sniff the cup and make a face. "It's black," I deadpan. Temari gives me a 'and your point is' look. I sigh. "I don't drink coffee without cream. It's disgusting black - makes me sick."

"Too bad," Kankuro says sarcastically. "I guess she can't drink it." He reaches to take the mug back, but Temari swats his hand away and gives him a pointed look. "Ow! What? . . . No. No! I'm not getting-!"

"Now!" Temari snaps. "Or we'll be even more late than we already are."

Shooting his sister a dirty look, Kankuro snatches the mug away from me and storms off in what I assume is the direction of the kitchen. He returns a couple minutes later and all but shoves the cup back into my hands. "Here. I still say this is a bad idea."

Cradling the warm mug in my hands, I glance between Temari and Kankuro. The kunoichi makes a circular waving motion with one hand. "Hurry up and drink it. We need to have left five minutes ago."

I sniff the contents of the cup, breathing in the slightly-less-strong scent of coffee now that it has a bit of cream added to it. Hopefully sugar, too, though - knowing Kankuro - he wouldn't willingly give me sugar. Glancing one last time at them and then shrugging, I down the mug of coffee - as quickly as possible when drinking such a warm drink, that is. I don't want to scald my mouth, after all.

The caffeine doesn't kick in immediately, but then again, I don't have time to think about what I just did. As soon as the cup is empty, Temari snatches it away from me and tosses it to someone nearby – a maid perhaps? I don't have the chance to see as she then seizes my arm and practically drags me out of the guest mansion, Kankuro at our heels. "Ow! Hey! What's the rush, Temari?" I demand.

"You were supposed to report to the Intelligence Department with the other girls twenty minutes ago," the fan-user replies pointedly, still walking swiftly. "Gaara should have woken you up when he got up, but did he? No. He should have told us that you were still sleeping when left, but did he? No. He just left. I thought you were with him. Inoichi Yamanaka had to come searching for you. Do you know how embarrassing it was to answer the door to find the head of the Yamanaka Clan giving you the look?"

I have a hard time stifling a laugh. "The look?" I echo.

"Yeah," Kankuro chuckles, jogging up next to us, "the 'I am very disappointed in you. What do you think you're doing?' look." Temari shoots a glare at him, and he grins. "It was actually pretty funny. I'm usually the one at the receiving end of those sorts of looks."

This time, the giggle breaks free with little to no resistance on my part. Temari's scowl deepens, if that's even possible. "And that's not the worst part!" she declares. "He wouldn't tell me why he was so upset. He just stood there and waited for me to figure it out. I was mortified when it finally dawned on me!"

"When what dawned on you?" I ask.

Temari stops suddenly, and I almost run into her. "When what -? I just told you! You were supposed to report to the Intelligence Department with the other girls over twenty minutes ago!"

I blink. Oh. "Oh, riiiight." I laugh. "I remember now. You told me that. I forgot." She stares at me. "What?"

"And I thought I was having a bad morning," Kankuro mumbles behind me, no small bit of humor in his voice. A lot of humor actually. I glance back at him. Yep. He's grinning.

I return the grin, giggling.

"You both are going to be having worse mornings if we don't get to the Intelligence Department now."

I straighten at her no-nonsense tone, snapping a sharp salute. "Yes, ma'am! Right away, ma'am!" I chirp before pivoting and leaping up onto the nearest rooftop. As soon as my feet touched the tiled roof, I bolt away - moving as fast as my heightened speed can carry me. I barely hear Temari shout my name before she's too far away to make out anything else.

I move like the wind. No. I am the wind. Fast, furious, and unstoppable, I dart across rooftops and leap over streets, both large and small. The world is just a blur of color moving past, and I bet I'm just as fuzzy to the people below. The Flash has nothing on me! Haha! I'll be there in no time!

Wait.

I skid to a stop on a flat roof, dust and small flecks of concrete skittering away from my feet. The wind that was pulled in my wake continues forward, blasting past me with a howl before quickly dying away. I blink several times before looking around. "Uhhh . . ." With a giggle, I realize that I don't know where the Intelligence Department is!

I turn back the way I came, cocking my head at the wildly-fluttering flags, tarps, and laundry. There are even papers fluttering in the air like giant pieces of confetti, no doubt pulled along behind me for the ride. "Oops," I snicker, taking a few jogging steps forward before dashing off again – this time, back toward where I had left Temari and Kankuro. They couldn't have gotten very far. It should be easy for me to find them again.

Then again . . . a lot of these rooftops look the same . . .

I pause on the crest of a building, glance around, and cup my hands over my mouth. "Temaaaariiii! Kankurooooo!" I turn my head and listen, face scrunched in concentration. Nothing. Okay. One down . . . hundreds to go.

With just a slight shift of weight and push off my perch, I bound to another building and repeat the process. "Temaaaariiii! Kankurooooo!" No reply.

Jump. Repeat. "Temaaaariiii! Kankurooooo!" Nothing.

Hop. Shout. "Temaaaariiii! Kankurooooo!" No sign of them.

Again. Zip.

Again. Zilch.

Again. Nada.

This is harder than I thought. I leap to another rooftop, zooming over the marketplace. "TEMARIIII! KANKUROOOOO!" Still no sign of them. I frown and put my hands on my hips. Maybe it's time for a change in tactics. I sweep my eyes across the rooftops. Hmm. If I can get to the outer wall and follow that to the gates, then maybe I can start over, following landmarks I know?

Or, I could go to the Hokage Heads . . . from there, I can find the Hokage Tower, and I can get Tsunade to take me! Perfect!

I turn in that direction, but when I try to dart toward it, I find I can't move. Blinking in confusion, I try again, but my body refuses to budge. Actually, it does move, but not in a way I want it to. My arms slowly lift until my hands are clasped together in one of the shinobi hand signs. Huh? I didn't do that, so why . . . ?

Two hands fall heavily on my shoulders, and if I could move, I would jump out of my skin. Unfortunately (or fortunately?), all I can do is squeak in surprise. "Alright, Shikaku," an unfamiliar male voice says from behind me. "You can let her go. I got her . . . finally."

Who? What? This cold feeling that I hadn't noticed before seeps from my limbs, and suddenly I can move, though, not really. I stay rooted to the spot, somewhat terrified, as the hands squeeze my shoulders. From some ways behind me, another male voice grunts, "It's about time. Damn, that girl is fast." More softly, the voice mutters, "Troublesome." Shikamaru!

Slowly, I turn and find myself staring up at an unfamiliar blonde man. Maybe he's not so unfamiliar, though. There's something about him . . . oh, what is it?

"Kaitlyn Davies?" the man inquires. I nod dumbly. "I am Inoichi Yamanaka and this is my good friend Shikaku Nara." He motions to one side, where a gruff-looking man approaches. Oh. Not Shikamaru.

I look between them, somewhat confused for a moment. "Nara? Yamanaka? Oh! You're Ino's dad!" The blonde man nods with a smile, and I turn to the one with scars down the right side of his face. "And you're the guy that gives bad marriage advice - Shikamaru's dad!"

Inoichi makes a slight choking sound, but Shikaku doesn't reply, just blinking lazily at me. I can almost see the "No comment," in his eyes, and I giggle.

Clearing his throat, Ino's dad speaks again, "We ran into Temari and Kankuro, and they told us they had . . . lost track of you. We're here to bring you to the Intelligence Department, where I will be working with you to compile what information you know about the Akatsuki."

I grin and nod quickly. "Right. Yeah. I can do that. Lead the way!"

IBIKI

Oh. Dear. Kami.

I stare at the girl seated across the mostly-bare table from me, somewhat dumbfounded. Normally, the people I face down like this are reluctant to speak and I have to 'persuade' them to do so by any means I see fit. This time, though, the girl won't stop talking. I have no trouble at all getting her to start. The trouble, now, is getting her to stop.

How did I get myself into this position? Why, again, did I volunteer to help collect the information these girls know? Oh, that's right, because I would be doing a great service to my village. I would be helping protect and defend Konoha from the attack that is bound to come at almost any moment.

Konoha had better be grateful.

And Tsunade owes me.

Big time.

I should have known better than to actually grant Inoichi's request that I take over his questioning so that he could go handle some 'important clan business' elsewhere. The harrowed look in his eyes should have been a warning enough to turn him down and go do something else. Anything else. Did I? No. Instead, I graciously granted his request, and now I'm stuck here, forced to listen to a flow of non-stop words in a gratingly high-pitched voice and at a too-fast-to-be-not-caffeine-induced speed.

All it had taken was a single question. "Why don't just you tell me what you told Inoichi, and we'll start there, hmm?"

I never knew it was possible for someone to talk that fast. I really hope this is being recorded for future review. Most of what she has said has flown right past me before I have a chance to comprehend it.

At first, I actually tried to listen, interject, and ask for clarification on certain points, but I soon discovered that those attempts were futile and only really make things worse. Such questions would send her on entirely new spiels - not to mention tangents that seem to be pointless and without any real use to us at this point in time.

Like everything she has said about Akasuna no Sasori. He's dead, girl! We don't need to know anything about him! Focus on the live and at large ones!

It's no use, though. All I can do is sit here and listen - or tune her out, for the most part. We'll probably get more useful information from the other four girls. For now, I'll just let her go on thinking she's being helpful. Maybe, to pass the time, I can come up with creative ways to shut her up. Of course, I'm not permitted to act on them, but it will still prove to be entertaining to imagine them at the least. It's better than the alternative.

When I reach one particular imagining that involves nailing her tongue to the roof of her mouth, a shift in the girl's tone of voice draws my attention. I blink and focus on her for the first time in what feels like hours. She's obviously rather upset about something, but what? Knowing I'm probably going to regret it, I start to listen again.

". . . slice open his stomach and rip out his spine and drive nails through his fingers!" she all but growls. I blink again in surprise at the suddenly darker expression on her face.

I lift a hand. "Hold up. Who is this again?"

The girl lets out an angry huff. "Deidara! If I get my hands on him, I'm going to make him regret ever hurting my Gaara!"

Hmm, now this could be interesting. Folding my hands on the table, I lean forward with a grin. "Go on." After taking a breath, she does, outlining every gruesome detail of her plans for the Akatsuki member. Maybe I was wrong about this girl - Kaitlyn was her name? Yes, I think I like this one. We'll get along famously.