"I was wrong," Sybil's text read.

It took Tom only moments to respond. "If you were wrong then so was I."

"What are you talking about?"

"What are you talking about?" He tossed back.

"I should have just asked." Through the phone she felt him growing impatient. "If you had a girlfriend," she continued in another text, explaining.

"Alright."

"And I know she wouldn't be happy." There was another text, showing Tom everything that graced his screen were pure, unfiltered thoughts. "I wouldn't be happy either."

"I wouldn't do that, by the way," Tom assured. "I mean, that was the point of me saying that."

"I know. We dated once, remember?"

There was silence thereafter. Sybil had a surgery to sit in on and Tom had two lectures and office hours to keep. But afterward, just as soon as she had changed out of her scrubs and began to head toward the tube, Sybil thought to text him again. She almost did, and would have, had he not texted her first. He told her how on his way home he'd seen something that reminded him of her. What he didn't tell her was that this happened often, but before today he had yet to act on it. Even so, he was glad he did. Their conversation continued for the next several hours, pausing only when Sybil went to Psycle or Tom showered before bed. When they woke in the morning it carried on again with him wishing her a good day and her returning the favor. It didn't appear to either of them that they'd soon have to exist together beyond the glass of their cellphone screens.

~!~

"Here," Tom said simply, handing Sybil a simple white cup.

She was standing at the nurse's station, all of her weight pressed into the counter she was writing upon. It was likely Tom didn't know that when he texted her this morning to say hello she had already been at the hospital for two hours. For Sybil, it was nearly lunch time, but that was not the only reason she was perplexed by the beverage.

Even with its cardboard sleeve, Sybil could feel the warmth contained in the travel cup. She looked to the spout and squinted. "What is it?"

Tom grinned. "Tea. Is that okay?"

She didn't answer his question but instead gave one of her own. "Are you poisoning me?"

He couldn't help but to continue to smile. Already this was much more civil than either were used to being. "Wouldn't I have done that before?" Sybil was glaring at him, causing Tom to avert his eyes out of embarrassment. "Hardly," he settled.

"You can't…you can't bring me drinks, Tom…" Sybil stated calmly. She felt just as uncomfortable delivering the news as she knew Tom would feel upon receiving it.

"But I can leave them in the breakroom? Do you want me to go back to that?"

She stepped into him. "Tom…"

"And drinks? It's a cuppa. I should have brought you a muffin. Or a protein bar. Something of substance…"

"I don't know if you know but people are talking and…" Her voice stilled to a whisper. "I don't want either of us getting in trouble."

"Trouble?"

"We can't...I don't...I don't want anyone getting any ideas."

"Oh, how awful that would be," Tom joked. But then: "You don't want them getting any ideas or you don't want me getting any ideas?"

"I don't know what that means…"

"You're not a great liar, Syb…"

"I'm not lying," she assured. "And you don't know me."

He chuckled. "I do know you, actually. What you mean is that you don't want me to know you."

Sybil swallowed. "That too."

To avoid him further, Sybil took a sip of her tea. It was just as she liked it: not too light and with a single packet of raw sugar. Tasting its perfection Sybil looked to him as if to ask how he knew. Her answer was delivered shortly thereafter when William passed, both men giving one another a slight nod in acknowledgement. Sybil could only smile; the tea was delicious and she was grateful for the gift. Had she told him that yet?

It seemed Tom didn't need an answer, or rather, he had one with her sipping at the drink before him, not daring to walk away. "Fry up tonight?"

"I'm working the late shift," Sybil explained emotionlessly.

"Perfect!" Tom beamed. "We can get some when you get out."

"Tom, we...we can't…"

"What? Be friends?" he inquired with just as much motivation. "That's what this is? Right?"

Those were her own words and she wondered if they hurt him the way they were currently hurting her. "I'll...can we get fry up tomorrow?"

Tom smirked. The issue wasn't them, it was the date, and Tom was pleased with himself to hear this was the case. In a way, he was quite proud of her too. "Are you working the late shift?"

"No. I work two shifts today and then I have tomorrow off."

"Perfect. Then let me make you dinner."

Sybil's eyes narrowed. "Where?"

"My flat. Where the fuck else?"

"I don't know if that's a good idea…"

"I know you love to eat, so that's not it…"

"Emilee will be there, no?"

"I mean, maybe," Tom shrugged. It was only when he moved that he saw how close the two remained and how because of this their voices, while animated, had been brought down to a whisper.

"She's not too fond of me."

"Most days she's not too fond of me either," Tom said with a breathy laugh.

Coming off of a sip of tea, Sybil's lips pursed at the sweetness of her drink and her nose scrunched upward. "That's reassuring."

"Well there's a chance she won't be home. There's also a strong possibility that I pay the rent and can therefore do what I want."

"I'll...sure."

Tom paused. He wasn't expecting an answer so quickly, if at all. He swallowed too and with eyes that dilated due to his nervousness dissipating to excitement, he could only nod. "So you'll come?"

"Maybe," Sybil shrugged now, causing both to smile at one another and then look away when the intensity of such a simple action had them both feeling breathless. "What are we having?"

"Taco Tuesdays, Syb! What else?"

Sybil giggle. "Ahhh, yes. Taco Tuesdays. I see old habits die hard."

All at once Tom's confidence was back and his eyes looked her up and down, taking all of her in. "Some of them." Sybil somehow managed to exist without melting underneath his gaze. Actually, she was quite enjoying the warmth his eyes gave.

"Do you want me to pick you up at your flat?" he asked, changing the topic.

"And then walk with me back to your flat?"

"I'll be leaving work, actually…" Tom explained.

"You don't know where I live."

"Yes, I do," Tom gave with a strong smile. "Will told me."

"He what?"

"Well he told me where he lived and then he mentioned that you two live together so…"

"That arse!"

Tom chuckled. "I'm not going to murder you. My heart needs you, remember?" Sybil rolled her eyes. "It's the truth!" he said with another laugh. When she didn't cave, Tom's tone changed. "But after my operation...all bets are off."

This finally had Sybil cracking a smile. Out of nervousness (and enjoyment) she had done nothing but sip at her tea and now the drink was dwindled to practically nothing. She had nothing to hide behind, and already the entire cardiology wing had watched the two interact. Any secrets she wished to keep from them or Tom were lost by now anyway.

"Great. Do we have to stop at the market?" she asked.

"Nope. Doing that tonight. Was going to ask what wine you wanted…"

"Wine and tacos? Is that a thing?"

He was laughing again. Really, Tom wasn't sure when it was he had breathed — he certainly hadn't stopped smiling. "Ale then?"

"Definitely ale. Just get whatever."

"Really? I was certain you would have turned down my offer of alcohol…"

"I'm not going to let you get me drunk, if that's what you're insinuating."

"Never!"

"You're not funny!" Sybil dismissed, all with a wide grin. Her lips were curved upward, bringing her cheeks, now flushed, to the highest point on her face. Similarly the two were still standing close and with Sybil's tea set down, Sybil found herself leaning in further.

"To most people I'm not but you think I'm hilarious."

"That statement is hilarious," she gave, causing Tom to chortle.

Her actions had his hands stuffed into his pockets. He worried that if she got any closer he'd have no choice but to place his hand on her side in the way he wanted. If she didn't move, his other hand would snake to her neck, bringing her lips to his in a slow, fiery connection. He thought of it often and was thinking of it now with eyes that stared off into space picturing the way she'd move against him.

"Grand!" he clapped, bringing himself out of his own reverie. When he returned to reality, Sybil was still standing before him. "Well I'm going to let you get to it. I'll see you tomorrow?"

Sybil nodded.

"And I'll talk to you tonight?"

She bit her lip now too. Like Tom her hands were crossed over her chest, resisting their urge to reach up and rest on his chest. She could have, if she truly wanted to. The wing was suddenly empty and in their loneliness, Sybil felt a chill of air brush by, coaxing him toward her. With everyone gone it was easy for her to give him her answer, this time with noise. "Of course."

~!~

Sybil had only ever seen this in movies - her, a pretty girl by most standards, examining herself in a full-length mirror as she held up different outfit choices to find the best fit. She never did this with Tom before. Usually she was in her school uniform or athletic gear because they had gone running or were about to. Or her favorite clothing option was none at all and she thought about that a lot lately, especially as the warmer months were beginning to creep in and Tom stopped wearing his waistcoats and began to roll his sleeves.

She didn't know why she cared. Perhaps if she was confident in what she was wearing, she could worry about other things, mostly the words she wished to give to him tonight. Sybil didn't want it to be anything more than a conversation and she hoped it would occur naturally but if it were anything like her current situation, that was seeming more and more doubtful the closer the clock ticked to seven.

Finally Sybil settled on a simple cotton dress and loose cardigan. She also made the conscious decision to wear tights and boots, hoping the less skin she showed the harder it would be for Tom to imagine her the way she was always imagining him. Even as she settled into the fabric Sybil continued examining herself. She had put on some eye makeup and her hair was braided at the crown and pinned up in the back. Was this too much? Did she care?

No. Yes. No. Yes. No. Yes…

"Sybil?"

The brunette nearly jumped at the sound of her name being called. It was strange she didn't see Gwen walk by and she made no effort of hiding this when she turned to her best friend with her mouth dropped open.

"Whoa!" Gwen beamed. "Where are you going?"

Sybil rolled her lips inward. "What? Nowhere!"

"Do you have a date?"

"I definitely do not have a date…"

"William!" Gwen called, turning around shouting into the hallway to do so. "C'mere! Sybil has a date!"

The boy came running. "What?" He used Gwen's frame and the frame to Sybil's bedroom door to stop his motion. When he saw Sybil, her eyes wide, begging him for help, he did nothing but let his face fall. "Oh." His voice diminished to nothing.

Gwen, previously lively, turned to him then back to Sybil and let out an Oh of her own. "What's going on guys?"

"Nothing's going on…" Sybil stammered.

"Sybil…" Gwen tried again. "Where are you going?"

"I'm not going anywhere, Gwen!" She practically threw her hands down like a child. It was difficult enough navigating her feelings toward her new relationship with Tom without doing so under the scrutiny of friends.

"Why are you lying?"

"I'm not lying!" she tried again.

Gwen took a step into Sybil's room but remained distanced from her best friend with arms that crossed stiffly over her chest. "So you're getting dressed up for a stroll?"

"Can't I just go out by myself?"

"You can, but that's not what this is."

"It's nothing…" Sybil assured.

"Nothing and yet William clearly knows about it."

"He doesn't know anything. There's nothing to know!"

"He seems to know something."

William looked between the two women. "I'm standing right here…"

"Well this is offensive," Gwen deadpanned. As she did, she turned for the door but was stopped by Sybil moving toward her.

"Gwen! Stop, alright! I'm...I'm going to Tom's to have dinner."

Gwen's voice dropped in both volume and pitch. "Tom's?" It was a mixture of confusion and disdain and Sybil couldn't tell which was more unsettling.

"He's going to be by soon and we're just going to take the tube and he's making tacos and I'll be home tonight. Promise."

Gwen let out a gentle sigh. Her arms fell but her body remained facing the door, showing just where she wished to go. "Why was that so hard? And why does William know and I can't?"

"I don't want you to judge me."

"I'm not judging you, Sybil. I don't understand it and it scares me, but there's no judgement."

"Why does it scare you?"

"It took you awhile to get over him and now he's back and you've invited him back into your life like it's nothing."

"I haven't invited him anywhere," Sybil insisted. "He's pushed his way in."

"And you've let him!" Gwen tossed back. For as relaxed as she was trying to be it was clear she still had a horse in this race. "I mean, clearly. You're going to his place for dinner."

"I'm trying to be friends with him."

"Trying?"

"Yes, trying," Sybil repeated, now with eyes that studied the floor. "Maybe if we're friends…" She expected Gwen to cut her off and when she didn't, Sybil was concerned.

"Maybe what?"

"I'm trying to forgive him," Sybil explained.

"You did forgive him. Or you let it go. Remember?"

"Well this is another step toward that."

There was silence. Sybil and William shared a glance and in doing so, highlighted just how still the room had become. Gwen finally inhaled sharply as if to restart what Sybil was working tirelessly to end. "Holy shit! You...you still love him."

"I don't...no. Stop."

"Sybil…"

"I don't, Gwen!" She said strongly. Then: "This is why I didn't want to tell you!"

"Sybil, I'm sorry, alright? But that's the only way this makes sense."

"That doesn't make sense to me," Sybil stated helplessly. "I'm an adult and he's an adult and we're just getting together to have dinner."

"You haven't just agreed to have dinner with someone since..."

Sybil's eyes narrowed. "Since Tom? Yeah, I know." Gwen was currently walking a fine line between supportive friend and cruel outsider. Then again, maybe that was her fault. Sybil reasoned that if she had been in the red head's shoes, it was likely she wouldn't be too pleased either.

"Sybil...I just don't want you to get hurt, babe."

"I'm not going to get hurt. I'm not in love with him anymore and I'd like for us to be friends. I don't want to die resenting him."

"I just don't know if seeing him like this is going to help that."

"Sure it will. It'll help me to realize that we're better off apart."

"But if you don't believe that, Sybil, then what good is that?"

"But I do believe that," Sybil said simply. She shrugged too, hoping her indifference was perceived as such.

"No, love, you don't. Because if you did, you wouldn't be going."

A rebuttal was lost on all of them, replaced instead by Sybil's phone dinging, signaling she had received a new message. Instead of grabbing for the device, she grabbed her coat and bag off her bed and headed for the door. She didn't bother to turn off the light, inviting Gwen and William to remain in it long after the front door was latched and locked.

Gwen was soft again, shown by the return of the high-born accent she had picked up when she agreed to move to London. With William, Gwen didn't need volume to show just how disappointed she was. Then again, it was more clear now than it had been when Sybil was present. For a moment, just a blink, William thought the girl might cry.

"You encouraged this, didn't you?" She accused as she pointed a finger toward his nose. At the same time she was walking away, heading back into the kitchen to continue making her dinner.

"Excuse me?" William asked, now following.

"You weren't there, William!" Gwen practically shouted. "You didn't see how broken she was!"

"Why does that matter, Gwen? If this is what she wants then let it happen!"

"If I can help her avoid the heartbreak, I will. I should have the first time…" She admonished. William paused, wondering now just what it was Gwen thought of Tom all those years ago. She agreed to keep Sybil's secret, but maybe she had some of her own and they involved a day-to-day fluctuation of resenting Tom while also acknowledging just how happy he made her best friend.

"But you can't, Gwen! None of us can! It doesn't seem Sybil can either. Isn't that clear?"

"No, it's not clear! She's going to his place to have dinner for fuck's sake!"

Gwen was at the counter now, rolling a knife against a cutting board to cut up vegetables. William followed but kept his distance leaning against the kitchen table with his arms crossed over his chest. "First off, you sound pointed and I don't appreciate it. Secondly, I need you to step outside of yourself and see it through her eyes. Imagine some guy who you loved broke your heart. You're devastated and it takes you years to get over him. Your life is awesome and you have so much going for you but you don't date and you practically get offended by guys who even dare to check you out. Then the heartbreak kid comes back onto the scene and you're forgiving. What does that make you?"

"Stupid," Gwen gave simply.

"No, Gwen. I'm sorry but no. That's not Sybil. I know why you want to fight this and I honestly think she does too. I mean, she has. It's been months now...several weeks of her blowing him off. But she's given in just like I think she always knew she would. She can't help but to be attracted to him now if she never really got over it."

"She deserves more than an attraction, William!" Gwen reminded loudly.

"Maybe he's changed," he offered.

"I don't care if he's changed."

"Well can you try? For her?"

"I don't approve of this." Gwen stated strongly, hoping it was for the last time.

"Yeah, well you're not in a position for that to matter. So be just like you were then...supportive. You don't get to steer your friends away from potential happiness and say you're helping them because you want to save yourself the time and effort it takes to get them through the tough times that may follow. You just don't. If they take chances, you do too. That's how friendship works."

~!~

Sybil jolted down the steps. Somehow in the time she had taken to get ready, it had rained and now the London night was nothing but black skies and puddles that caught lights on nearby storefronts. She moved so quickly that her bag slapped at her backside and out of nervousness she held her hands tightly in her pockets, keeping the material close to her body. When she finally stopped she reached for her phone. It was almost as if she didn't want Gwen seeing her reaching for the item so quickly after departing. Then again, Sybil felt that both Gwen and Mary would choose what they wanted to see and there was no sense in attempting to change the lens they wore that cast the entire situation in various shades of doubt.

It actually wasn't a text from Tom, but an email. That didn't stop Sybil from continuing down the road, moving so quickly her feet couldn't manage to get acquainted with the pavement below. She was familiar with Tom's neighborhood and if she had his address it was likely she could get herself to his flat but the plan was that the two would walk together. Not wanting to stop walking but also lacking clear direction, Sybil wondered how silly she would look if she just continued to circle the block until he called.

Sybil couldn't be mad at him; it was not even seven and she remembered how he used to get so lost in his dissertation. She imagined things had changed a bit now that Tom had dedicated himself to the topics he loved and had also managed to make money off of the knowledge he'd acquired back in Cambridge. What Sybil wouldn't accept was that he was any less hard working, no matter how cynical he had become.

"Hey!"

Sybil turned quickly. Without having to look, she knew it was him. His voice always tickled her ear, no matter how close he stood. "Oh, hi!" she sighed out. At the same time she brought her feet to a stop.

As he drew closer, Tom tilted his head and began to smirk. "You okay?"

"What? Yeah, I'm fine."

His smile only grew. "You don't look okay."

Sybil rolled her eyes and the two began to walk. "Ghee, thanks."

Tom sighed out. He previously had his hands stuffed into his pockets but he now removed them so he could press his hand to her back to guide them across the street. "What I meant was 'what's wrong?'"

"Nothing," Sybil said, now shaking her head.

"You know that if you tell me you don't want to talk about it I'll just say 'okay' and we'll move on, right?"

Sybil finally looked to him. "Well then I don't want to talk about it."

"Okay, that's f—"

"Gwen's not happy that I'm here," she revealed quite easily.

Tom raised an eyebrow. "Here?"

"With you. That soon we're going to be at your flat."

"I didn't know you were a child that needed supervision," Tom quipped.

"I'm…" Sybil's voice trailed off as she began to study the lines on his face. "I'm not. I just—"

"What you're saying is that she doesn't trust you."

Sybil looked to Tom, giving him an intense gaze that begged to be believed in. "I don't think she trusts you," she said strongly, hoping he understood her meeting.

"What? Am I going to take advantage of you? No Syb, she doesn't trust you to be around me without…"

It was Sybil's turn to be amused. Her features mimicked his, her mouth now grinning and her eyebrows lifting as she watched his mouth, waiting for an answer. "Without what?"

"I don't know." But he did and it didn't take long for him to continue his thought. "She doesn't think that we can be friends."

"No one does."

Tom looked to her. "No one?"

"Mary's not too thrilled about this either."

His eyes widened. "She knows you're here? Man, I didn't know this was that big of a deal. Should I call my friends and tell them our plans? I don't want them to feel left out…"

Sybil could have rolled her eyes but instead she kept her focus toward the ground. "I didn't know you had friends," she jested.

"Ha Ha," he exaggerated. "Very funny."

Sybil looked away again. Already she was enjoying herself too much and already that was terrifying her. "Mary just knows that we're talking and—"

"Ahhh," Tom accepted. "How very Cambridge of us. We're talking, are we?"

"Quite literally, yes," Sybil clarified as if it were necessary. "We're not going to shag."

"Thanks for clearing that up."

"Figured I'd get that out of the way," she continued sarcastically. Again the pair shared mischievous smiles.

They were almost to the tube. Their conversation flowed so naturally Sybil had to take a look around and observe their exact location. She must have trusted Tom to get her there because she moved without any hesitation. As they paid their fare and moved toward the track Sybil gave Tom another small smile.

Tom gave her the same thing in return. The two were standing close but he still noticed the attempt she'd made to look more well-kempt now that they were outside of the hospital. In a way, this was dangerous. She was his doctor and he was her patient and the two should not even be entertaining the idea of existing as anything else — even as friends. Sybil knew this but it didn't stop her from sitting close to Tom when the two entered the train and took a seat.

"You look nice, by the way."

"We're still not going to shag…"

Tom let out a breathy laugh in disbelief. "It seems you're thinking about that far more than I am."

"I doubt it…"

"Well you do," he persevered. "Look nice, that is…"

"Thank you," Sybil gave softly.

"It's nice to know you own clothes other than your scrubs."

"Ugh, I know," she groaned. "They're hardly the most attractive things in my closet. And that damn coat…"

"Well I think you look quite cute in them. I told you that."

"You said fit, actually." Honestly the reminder was more for Sybil's benefit. She thought about his words a lot, especially each morning when she got ready for work.

Tom looked away, his eyes drifting to the ceiling of the train car. "That too."

Sybil smiled but soon her expression fell. "I'm sorry if I was a hag before."

"Hardly a hag. You're allowed to have off days, you know. Off hours and minutes too."

She paused, noticing now how he was particularly clean-shaven and how the collars on his shirt were starched just enough to keep their shape. "You can't forgive me for everything just because I'm so busy trying to do the same for you."

Tom pressed a hand to his stomach and let out a belly laugh. "I'm a little offended that's what you think I'm doing."

"I think that's what I want you to be doing," Sybil admitted honestly. "But I know you're being genuine."

"You know," Tom began, "We do a lot of overthinking."

"Is that a complaint?"

"An observation," he said just as simply.

"You're right," Sybil accepted with a slight nod. "We do."

"I'm going to try not to…" Tom vowed.

"Alright."

He smirked again — he was always so hopelessly amused by her but here even more so when she was so close and the two would soon be alone at his flat. "This is the part where you say you're going to try to."

Sybil turned her neck to look at him. The smile she gave him was a closed-mouth one, but he saw the sentiment behind it, all of it just beyond her lips, not yet mature enough to be released to him. "I've already tried," she explained. "So I guess I'm going to continue to try. Better?"

Tom nodded and sat back on his seat. The repositioning once again found the two close, their fingertips brushing in a way that was almost intimate. "Much."

Thanks for all the guest reviews! I just wish you'd get usernames so I can respond.

Next chapter is my favorite in the fic so far, if not the entire story. Who's ready?

x. Elle