Rachel laid there in bed, watching him sleep. His features were so soft, child like and innocent as he slept. It was wonderful seeing him at ease. He so deserved it. All the hard lines that were always present on his face disappeared. Last night…last night she had saw Finn come alive. His eyes sparked with electricity, and she lost herself in them. He could have done anything to her and she wouldn't have cared as long as his eyes were alive.
Looking at his face now, with his eyes shut and the little bit of drool that came out of his mouth, Rachel smiled thinking he looked more like a four year old than a thirty three year old. He was so adorably handsome. Letting her fingers ghost over his freckles, she counted each one. Tracing his lips with her finger, she had seen him smile last night, a smile that made her feel like she was the only person in the world. She knew it made him feel vulnerable, which he worked hard to disguise, being a bodyguard, but it made him so much more.
Rachel smiled as she continued to lightly trace his lips, then gasped in shock as his mouth opened and captured her finger in-between his teeth. When his tongue touched the pad of her finger, she felt a stirring in her core that traveled up her spine to the top of her head giving her a light headed feeling that was wonderfully exquisite.
Closing her eyes at the sensation, she felt his lips on hers, melding them together and starting a dance that she didn't want to end. Feeling him pull away, she looked into his bright whiskey eyes, and smiled seductively, "Good morning Finn. Did you sleep okay?"
She felt her eyes widen when she saw that addicting grin of his, "Mornin' Rach. Slept better than I have in a long time."
"So did I." She wanted to stay in bed with his arms around her. He really did make her feel like the only person in the world. Remembering where she was though, her eyes got wide with worry, "Do you think your dad heard us last night?"
"Nah, this room is soundproof. He and my mom didn't have any desire to hear a teenage boy playing loud music, video games and banging on the drums, and if he never heard my renditions of Metallica songs, then he didn't hear you and your perfect sounds." Finn murmured against her neck. Rachel didn't get a chance to ask her next question because Finn had caught her lip between his teeth, sucking lightly on it and then pressed closer, deepening the kiss.
Rachel laced her fingers into the back of his hair trying to get as close to him as possible, relishing in the skin on skin contact until a loud bang made both of them jump apart. "Finn! Finn! If Miss Berry is sleeping on your bed; you better be on the floor! Your mom raised you to be respectable and I won't have you be any other way. Got it. I'll see you two tonight when I get home, and I won't tell anyone at work that she's here."
Rachel bit her lip to keep from laughing, but thought how incredibly innocent it was that Finn's step-dad was set on keeping his step-son above reproach. Rachel buried her head in the crook of his neck as she heard Finn yell, "Got it Burt. Rachel is safe from me, I promise."
"Sure Finn." Rachel heard the fatherly sarcasm come through the door. Both stayed perfectly still waiting for the bang of the front door.
Rachel jumped up and sat on her knees, excited to be alone in the house with Finn. No one in the house but her and Finn. Smiling wickedly with thoughts of a day in bed, Rachel was met with the loud, rumbling stomach of one Finn Hudson, putting a stop to her sexy thoughts.
"Hungry Finn?" Rachel asked already knowing the answer.
"Um yea, well I haven't eaten since yesterday morning and…"
"You have the healthiest appetite I've ever seen for a man. I think you could empty out an all you can eat buffet, Finn." Rachel saw a blush creep up his cheeks, and she smiled, thrilled she could do that to him. "Why don't we go downstairs and I make some pancakes or something."
She saw Finn's eyebrows lift up in excitement, "I can has pancake? I can has chocolate chip pancakes and sausage?" Rachel laughed whole heartedly at his silly toddler like words and the gleefully happy look on his face. It felt so good to do that; it had been forever since she had just let herself enjoy something silly. Rolling off the bed and looking for something to cover herself up with, she felt something hit her back. Looking down she saw a mass of silky red material. Looking at Finn, she saw him grin as he said, "My old high school jersey. I always wondered what it would look like on a beautiful woman."
Blushing, Rachel felt the cool smoothness flow over her as she pulled it on and let it fall to her knees. "This thing is bigger than some of my dresses! I didn't realize you were that huge!"
Walking downstairs to the kitchen, Finn helped Rachel find everything for the chocolate chip pancakes, and helped her make them, surprising Rachel. "I didn't know you knew how to cook?"
"Yea, well it's either learn how to cook, go out to eat all the time, or eat MRE's, so after my mom banned me from the kitchen for catching lasagna on fire, I took some cooking classes at school. Nothing fancy, but I can live." Rachel saw a blush on Finn's cheek and smiled a little.
Breakfast was filled with laughter as the two of them teased and played around as they made the batter and Finn watched Rachel cook the pancakes. Rachel marveled at the transformation that had taken over Finn. Standing next to her at the counter eating was not the man the first morning looked perplexed by being asked what he'd like for breakfast. This man smiled a smile that made Rachel feel giddy. This man laughed and teased. This man's eyes glowed an enchanting, mischievous brown that made her smile. This man didn't exist in LA, but apparently only appeared here in Lima.
If this was the one place he could be happy, then she'd be willing to move to this small town just to see it. Where did that thought come from? Rachel needed to stop having these little fantasies. One way to bring herself out of this fantasy land and Finn out of his happy state was the pink packages sitting in her tote. She didn't have to bring them out right now; she had followed Sue's directions, and there was no way her stalker would know she wasn't in LA.
Looking at Finn with chocolate on the corner of his mouth, she fought the urge to kiss it off, so she sat up on the counter, "So what is there to do in Lima, Mr. Hudson?"
"Not a hell of a lot Miss Berry. But the first thing is we need to disguise you. I think we need to change your hair color and how you dress. You're a huge star, and people in Lima can't keep their mouths shut, so I think you're about to become a tomboy."
Rachel's hands were on her hair as soon as he said "change your hair color", "Finn Hudson you are NOT changing my hair color, and I'm sure as hell not cutting it!"
Finn shook his head, chuckling, "Well, I'm going to have Aunt Lou Lou come over and lighten your hair just a bit. Nothing that can't be corrected back in LA. I would never dream of cutting your hair, it's too gorgeous to do something like that too"
Rachel raised an eyebrow when Finn said who would be doing her hair. If it wasn't Ken Pave, then no one touched her hair! "Who is Aunt Lou Lou, and why should I let her touch my hair?"
"Aunt Lou Lou is, was a friend of my mom's that is a beautician. I've known her all my life and she'll keep her mouth shut. She's not a gossip about important things, and she's good. I promise. She will take great care with your hair. Louisa Mayfor is the best in Lima, and she'll be here in about forty minutes. Go take a shower and I'll clean up down here."
Rachel smiled as she walked upstairs. Grabbing her toiletries she turned on the shower and stepped in, allowing the warm water to pelt her body. The water felt good, but not nearly as good as Finn had felt on her. The only thing was that he had left her wanting. They couldn't finish what they had both started, and the throbbing that was left made her ache.
She had never been one to take matters in her own hands, but this time she had to. Finn was being too much of a gentleman, and for once she didn't want a gentleman. Allowing the water to warm her and her hands to roam, Rachel hummed to herself, reliving last night and allowing that memory to help her along.
Suddenly there was a knock on the door, "Rachel…Rachel…, Aunt Lou Lou is here with all of her stuff. Come on down stairs." Walking out of the bathroom in her fluffy robe, and down the stairs, Rachel was met in a huge hug by a lady almost as small as she was, with a beautiful smile and head full of silver hair.
"Well Ms. Berry, it's time to hide your beautiful hair. I'm going to lighten it to a lovely deep caramel with a few highlights. I'm just going to cut about an inch and a half off, so it can either grow out or some simple extensions will add length if you need it. The coloring I'm using is very gentle and won't damage your hair at all. Just relax." Rachel instantly liked the little woman and let her do her magic. An hour later Rachel was amazed how just changing her hair color changed her look. She seemed completely different.
Thanking Aunt Lou Lou, she walked into Finn's bedroom, disappointed that he wasn't there, but saw some clothes laid out on the bed with a note, "Needed to run another errand. Don't leave the house. Thought you would look cute as a sports chick. Finn x" Rachel smiled at the "x" beside his name.
Looking at the clothes Finn had lain out; she rolled her eyes, but understood the need to look totally different than she normally would. Finn had laid out a Cubs jersey, and Cubs visor. Looking in her luggage, she grabbed a red tank top, denim capris (Finn's short pants) and tennis shoes. Pulling her hair up in a ponytail and pulling it through the back of the visor and tying the jersey in a knot at her waist, Rachel admired herself in the mirror on the back of the door. She looked cute, and so different with the more caramel colored hair, but to change herself, she grabbed some colored contacts that Sue had given her and her eyes went from brown to almost a golden hazel.
Grinning at the different her, she walked down stairs to be greeted by the door opening and Finn walking in with several packages. "Wow Rach, you look…just wow. Where were you when I was in high school?"
"Either middle school or high school being in school plays, musicals and glee club." Rachel stated cheekily grinning at Finn's stuttering and the lustful look in his eyes.
She watched as Finn put the bags on the couch and grabbed her hand, leading her to the couch. Pulling her down on his lap, she didn't have time to think as his lips touched hers in the softest, sweetest kiss she had ever felt. His lips were like feathers brushing her lips, but sending shocks of electricity through her with each touch. Looping her arms around the back of Finn's neck, Rachel brought his lips closer to hers, allowing her tongue to run over his lips, tasting chocolate and him.
"God Rach, I think I could do this all day, just kissing you. You're just so addicting and just everything I've been missing." Rachel's eyes widened at the very personal proclamation Finn had just made. Instead of backing away though, she just leaned in and gave him a hug, trying to convey her happiness through it and her smile.
Wanting to change the subject, she looked over at the bags, "Did you buy me presents?"
"Um…yea, sort of. I got you some more clothes to fit your persona here in Lima and also a motorcycle helmet, pink of course."
"How'd you know my size for the clothes and helmet?"
"I called Kurt and he told me and also the size of your head for the helmet, since you've been measured for wigs. You can't be on my motorcycle without a helmet, so I got you a full face with a mic so you and I can talk on the bike." Finn pulled out the baby pink helmet with a mirrored full visor.
Pulling it out, Rachel lifted the visor and grinned, "I feel like Danica Patrick."
Finn was glad that Rachel hunted him down. Last night had been beyond the crazy dreams he'd been having since he started guarding Rachel. She was a true goddess and deserved to be revered and treated as one, at all times. Finn knew he'd gone way over the line, but he wasn't going to regret it, not this time. Making breakfast with her was fun; something he hadn't had in a long time. Everything was just different when he was with Rachel. She made things better, fun, brighter. He liked how he felt when he was with her, even though the feeling was so foreign to him now.
Sitting on the couch, watching Rachel read some book from the bookcase, it hit Finn. He didn't just like Rachel Berry; he loved Rachel Berry. How the hell did that happen? She was his client; she needed protecting, not loving. But here he loved Rachel Berry, and knowing it was the worst possible thing to happen, but it had.
Thinking about his mom, Finn's smile turned to a small frown; his mom would have loved Rachel. She would have welcomed Rachel like the daughter she wanted, and he could totally picture the two of them cooking or baking in the kitchen, laughing and talking. He could picture Rachel taking his mom out for a "Ladies' Lunch" that his mom would go to with her friends. She would have loved Rachel.
Making a decision he wasn't expecting, Finn stood up suddenly and grabbed Rachel's new helmet. "Rachel, I have someone I want you to meet, and it's important to me, so come on." Rachel looked up at Finn with a smile in her eyes. Grabbing the hand he held out, she allowed him to lead her out to the garage and the motorcycle.
After he got Rachel situated on his bike and he felt her death grip on his waist and shirt, he walked the bike out and took off in the direction of the cemetery. Taking the route he would know by heart until the day he died, he stopped the bike in front of a family plot with a simple granite headstone that said HUDSON. Helping Rachel off the bike and taking the helmet from her, he led her to the headstone and allowed her to look before he said anything. He needed to get his emotions under control before he could speak, or sadness, anger and loneliness would come pouring out.
Finn watched as Rachel lightly traced the letters on the headstone and of each name engraved on it, "Christopher D., Carole A., Finn C." As she traced his name, he could feel her eyes on him.
"Finn?" The question mark just hung in the air, and Finn closed his eyes, ready to tell Rachel his story, why Finn Hudson was the way he was.
"This is where I'll be buried when I die Rach, with my mom and dad. My dad died in Iraq, a Marine hero, my hero. I never met him, because I was just a baby. I only have one picture of him and me, with him holding me on his lap in his dress uniform as he sat in his leather recliner. I still have that recliner, and sit in it when I feel I need his advice, or just miss having a dad. My mom raised me on her own until she met Burt and they got married when I was in high school." Finn stopped for a moment to gather his thoughts and steady his voice.
"My mom was a nurse. She used my dad's benefits to go to school and get her nursing degree so she could take care of me. She was a great nurse and the best mom ever. She did everything a mom should do, plus everything a dad would do too. She taught me how to hit a change up in baseball, and throw a spiral in football. She encouraged my love of music and the drums. She was at every performance or game, often changing shifts so she could be there. I love her so much. I always knew that I would compare any woman I was ever with to her, and they would have to measure up to her, and no one ever did, until I met you. You're a lot like her Rach. You care for others. You treat everyone like family, and take care of them. All my friends hung out at my house, because my mom was their mom, she accepted everyone. She took care of them. Hell, Puck was pretty much my brother because he was at my house more than he was at his."
Finn took his natural seat next to the headstone, leaning against it and closed his eyes, like he had a thousand times before, but this time, he was telling a story to someone living, "My mom never really dated while I was growing up, because I was her first priority, but she met Burt and they fell in love and got married my junior year of high school. Burt is an awesome step-dad and did things with me my mom never was able to do or just couldn't. It was great having a mom and a dad for once." Finn smiled remembering actually getting to celebrate Father's Day with a living dad, instead of just coming to the cemetery and going home to cry.
"Anyway, my senior year I got a full music scholarship to Ohio State, and I was excited, but it just didn't feel right. I love music and everything that goes with it, but I didn't see a future in music for me. I will never be like you Rach, and make a living at performing. I thought about becoming a music teacher, but then I met the Marine recruiter at school, and I knew my calling. I was going to follow my dad's path, serve our country, and do something useful. My mom hated, hated that I did that. We had a huge fight about it, but after me storming out and Burt talking to her, she came to realize I'm my own man and I'm doing it for me, not for my dad." Finn stopped for a minute, allowing the scene to play back in his mind and remembering all the emotions that went with it. The hurt on his mom's face when he told her he signed his contract with the Marines.
Continuing with story, his eyes closed, not daring to look at Rachel, "I went into the Marines, and I was great at it. It was just right. I felt like I belonged there, and I became a leader. I went to college and got my degree in business, something I wouldn't have done if I'd gone to OSU. Then I got sent overseas, several times to Iraq and Afghanistan on special assignments doing things that may never see the light of day, but I did them and got rewarded and promoted for it. The last time though, that was when I found out about the problems my mom was having with one of her former patients."
Finn stopped and steadied his emotions, hoping all the anger didn't come out. He worked hard to keep in locked down in his soul, and since he never talked about what killed his mom, he wasn't sure what he would do, but he continued, "My mom worked on the cancer ward. She had a way with the cancer patients, making them comfortable, giving them hope and peace. Hell, she won numerous awards for it and always got tons of Christmas cards and thank you cards from former patients and families. Anyway, there was a guy, probably mid thirties that was one of her patients. He was all alone. No family and was being treated for leukemia. My mom treated him like all of her other patients, but gave him a little more attention because no one came to visit him or anything, so my mom did. She'd stay after work for an hour and just talk to him, or bring him a snack, things like that. Well, he went into remission, but he kinda got attached to mom, and he started asking her out and stuff. My mom was nice and told him that she was married and everything, but the guy wouldn't let up. When Burt told me the guy showed up at the house one morning, I put in for all my leave, which was just about a years worth and came home. I hoped that if I was here, the guy would get the picture and leave her alone. She was scared Rach. She wouldn't go anywhere by herself and refused to be in the house by herself. She'd find little things of hers at work come up missing. She got a restraining order, but that didn't do a hell of a lot of good, because he'd sneak in to grab her things. Well, with me being around, he laid off, but then just as I was getting ready to go back to California, he started up again. The worst was when he had stolen my mom's scrub top and jacked off into it. He sent it to our house and when my mom opened the package and realized what it was, she fainted."
Finn was grabbing his hair, tugging at it, trying to let that pain replace the pain his heart was feeling, with tears in his voice, staring out over the cemetery, he spoke softly, "There was nothing I could do. I had to go back. I used up all my leave and they wanted me to go on another assignment, even though I didn't want to. I wanted to be here and protect mom. Two days later, I had to leave for California, and at the airport my mom and Burt promised they would be careful. Two weeks later as I was finishing up my normal paperwork for the day, I got a phone call from the Lima police, actually from Puck, since he was a cop here. He was crying when he told me that the bastard had ambushed my mom and Burt in the movie theatre parking lot, shot Burt in the arm, shot and killed my mom and then killed himself. I remember getting up from my desk, walking over to the Lt. Colonel's office, and told him I was done with the Marines. I was actually filling out my re-enlistment papers when Puck had called me. I left to come back here, dealt with my mom's funeral, and decided I wouldn't let what happened to my mom happen to anyone else, so I started 24 Elite with all my money I'd saved up and asked some of my friends to join my company."
Finn finally looked at Rachel, finishing his story, "I decided that I hadn't been the best, because the best would have saved her, and she'd be here right now, asking me why I wasn't married and giving her grandkids. Instead, I'm giving my life to protect others so that they can have one. I figured it was a fair trade, and then you called for my services."
Finn laughed and shook his head. He looked at Rachel and wished she could see all the changes she brought out in him. He wished his mom could meet Rachel, but this would have to do, "I've pretty much lived these last three years giving my life over to others. I've personally took out the ability to have a choice. I do my job, and I do it well. No personal attachments, no feelings, just protect those that need it. I'm told what to do, and I always have been. High school told me what to do, the Marines told me what to do, my clients tell me what to do, and I've been happy with that, until now."
Finn looked right at Rachel, into those eyes that bore into his soul, "Then you called and needed protecting. You couldn't be like my other clients and just treat me like the hired help, you had to treat me like a person with a say in my life, and it all started to unravel when you asked me what I wanted for my damned breakfast. Then you had to get drunk and declare that you were going to make me happy and kissed me, and I kissed you back, something I've never done. Usually when a client tries to kiss me, I leave the assignment, but I couldn't with you. And then everything just seemed to spiral out of control. You're just so addicting. And then when I kissed you in the pool, I knew I needed to get away. I wasn't going to be able to protect you if I let my feeling get in the way, but you came and found me. I can't do this Rachel, I can't see you get hurt because I'm too damn close to you and it would kill me." Finn felt tears in his eyes and tried to shake them away, but they came anyway, pouring out as he felt delicate fingers wiping them away.
Looking up at what was once brown eyes that had turned hazel by contacts, Finn saw something he thought he'd never see in his life again; someone truly caring about him. Someone who thought Finn Hudson, and the mess his life was, was important. He loved her. That was all there was to it. There was no other explanation. He simply loved her. Not even realizing it, Finn had leaned forward and felt Rachel's lips gently brush his. Pulling back, he stood up and grabbed her hand and stood at the base of the grave.
Standing erect and proud, facing the headstone bearing the Hudson name, Finn squeezed Rachel's hand and said in a soft voice, "Mom and Dad, this is Rachel Berry. She's a very special lady and I wanted to bring her here to see you, because even though you're gone, you both are still important to me." Finn glanced at Rachel and saw tears falling from her eyes.
Turning her gently to face him, a look on concern in his eyes, he heard a whisper, "You have no idea how much this means to me Finn. You're mother and father have to be very proud of the kind, and chivalrous son they raised. One that cares deeply for others so much that he puts all others before himself. You are absolutely wonderful." Still looking at her, she bestowed that "everything will be better" smile that Finn loved.
Finn took Rachel's hand and led her back to the motorcycle not quite sure what to do next. He just poured his heart out to the woman he was falling in love with, and told her the story of how his life changed. He introduced her to his dead parents. He had to be the strangest guy around, but he hoped Rachel didn't think he was too weird.
Helping Rachel with her helmet, and getting her settled on the bike, Finn showed Rachel all of the sites in Lima, which weren't many. Finn took her to McKinley after hours and showed her around, including the choir room and the trophies New Directions had won. Finn blushed when Rachel commented on how young and adorable Finn looked in the picture from Nationals. "Do you still sing Finn? I mean really sing, not that karaoke you did at the party, but sing with all your soul?"
"I haven't in a long time Rach. I think the only thing I would only sing would be pretty sad songs."
"What about now? You don't seem as sad?"
"Maybe, like I haven't sung in a long time."
"Sing for me Finn. Sing a happy song, one that makes you smile and brings out the best in you. Please Finn, sing for me. I want to hear you." Rachel was pouting at him as they stood in the auditorium. Her eyes blinking, giving him a pleading look.
"Damn," he said, holding up his hands in defeat and watched Rachel jump up and down clapping, "What would you like me to sing, oh great Tony and Grammy winner?"
"I Can't Fight This Feeling Anymore, by REO Speedwagon. I've dreamt that you've sang it before."
Looking down, Finn didn't want to tell Rachel that he had sang that song a long time ago, so he just walked over to the piano. There were a few songs that Finn knew how to play, and this song just happened to be one. Sitting down, he let his fingers start to play the first few notes. As the sounds swirled around him, he let his voice join in, singing with all the emotions he had been feeling since he'd been with Rachel.
He wasn't going to fight what Rachel had brought out in him. Letting the notes continue to fill the air, Finn looked at Rachel and allowed everything to flow out of him. The last person Finn had been regular ole Finn around had been his mom, and hadn't been able to help his mom and save her, but he would for Rachel, and the raw emotions he felt for her came out.
Leaving the piano, he walked towards where she was standing, grabbing her hands and holding onto them for dear life. She was his lifeline. The person that made him alive, and he wasn't going to let anything get in the way of that. As the last notes left his mouth, Finn leaned his forehead against hers, needing that touch.
He smiled as he felt her breath on him as she gave a breathy, "Wow, just wow!"
Lifting her chin and staring right into her eyes, he said the words he realized earlier, not caring if she felt the same, "I love you."
Jacob was pissed. He had to fly into Cleveland and then drive to frickin' bum fuck everywhere Lima Ohio. Could Finn Hudson have been a bigger small town loser?
Since it was so late, Jacob grabbed a hotel room near the airport and decided that he would drive out tomorrow. He was seriously hoping that Rachel wasn't with Hudson, but he knew deep down she was. He had seen that kiss. As much as it revolted him, he recognized the passion both parties had for the other.
Sitting in the hotel room, Jacob pulled out his picture and looked at it rather crossly. Speaking to it, like a father would to a disobedient child, "Rachel, I don't know where you've gone off to, but if I find you with Finn Hudson, you and I are going to have a sit down. Lovely, talented ladies do not go running around with the hired help. People with think a lot less of you if you do that my dear. But of course I'll smooth everything over, just like I always do Rachel."
Jacob leaned over and gave the picture its nightly kiss, and settled in with some room service and some hotel porn. He dreamt of Rachel loving him with her whole body. But then as they were in one of those champagne glass hot tubs with bubbles all around them, he saw Finn Hudson storm in wearing his Marine uniform, climb up to them, pick up Rachel and walk out leaving Jacob all alone.
Waking up in a sweat, Jacob looked over at his picture again, Rachel smiling back at him, showering him with all her love, he whispered, "You would never choose that giant over me, would you my dear?" Grabbing the picture, he laid it on the pillow next to him and softly held it in his arms as he tried to go back to sleep, hoping Finn Hudson would stay the hell out of his mind.