Divulgence

Yu Kanda

It'd been almost a week since we'd come here last.

The three of us -me, Lenalee, and the stupid rabbit- loitered out the front of the building, waiting for someone we knew to emerge. We didn't know that many Noah clansmen.

We'd shared our findings with the rest of the clan.

They were unsure about what we were supposed to do. None of us wanted the Noah to wipe out another clan of demons, so taking the Moyashi from them wasn't and option.

We were still severely lacking in information.

Both Lavi and Lenalee exhaled sharply, drawing my attention back to the building's entrance. I easily spotted the white-haired human exiting through the large glass doors. He stood out in a crowd.

The Moyashi turned right and started walking.

Lenalee touched my arm, gaze transferring back to me. "Kanda…"

"We don't have time to deal with the Moyashi," I grumbled, not looking at her. Yes, we knew the Moyashi, but he wasn't a very good choice. Aside from being completely loyal to Noah, he was basically a living doll. Using someone like that and obtaining information from them was a difficult task.

"We can still use him," Lavi said, most likely guessing my train of thought. "Road said that she took his memories because it hurt, right? That means he's not totally emotionless."

And that… was a decent point.

I understood Lavi's intentions, though. These two idiots were far too kind for their own good.

Did they forget that the Moyashi was still our enemy?

Instead of voicing the question, I just groaned. "Fine. Do whatever the fuck you want."

Their faces lit up, and the next thing I knew, they were hurrying after the human boy.

I huffed, running a hand exasperatedly through my ponytail before jogged after my soft-hearted clansmen. They were so much work.

By the time I'd caught up to them, it became apparent to me that we weren't actually approaching the kid. Which would have been fine, you know, if that hadn't meant we were basically stalking the Moyashi.

Great.

|l|l|

The Moyashi would occasionally stop when he came to an intersection, before looking down at something in his hands and starting off again.

Right now, we were following him down a bright street, complete with colourful billboards, elegant signs and tasteful shops full of food and clothes. It was irritating listening to Lavi's constant complaints about his aching feet, which were consistently met with a scolding from Lenalee.

They both needed to quieten down before the kid noticed us all.

"But my fee-"

I pushed past them with a growl, taking the closest left, where I then came face-to-face with the Moyashi.

He blinked, hand grasping the metal bar of a door. After a moment of silence, he released the bar, gloved hand falling to his side. "Can I help you?"

Had Lavi not rammed straight into my back, I would have bit out some kind of snarky response to his question. Instead, I just cursed and shoved Lavi to the side.

The Moyashi stepped away from the door, both eyes on Lavi. "Are you alright, Bookman's apprentice?"

Rubbing the shoulder I'd shoved, Lavi smiled, seeming pleasantly surprised that the Moyashi was asking about his wellbeing. "Uh… yeah… Yu-chan does this all the time."

"Oi." I glared at the Noah dog, slightly pissed that my red-headed clansman was still calling me by that shitty name. "What are you doing away from your Mistress?"

"I'm checking the new stores affiliated with the company," he said, only the smallest of pauses between my question and his answer. "Road's father requested that I be the one to do it because these are his ventures and he doesn't like entrusting these tasks to the staff."

Taking that in, I turned my gaze to the store he'd been about to enter.

The colours used were all dark reds and blacks, with thin white letters and some vine-like design forming the sign.

A clothing store, maybe.

I didn't care.

The Moyashi took a phone out of his pocket, fiddled with it, then returned it back to where he'd found it. "This was the last, but it seems to be past closing time."

"Then eat with us," Lavi suggested, almost too quickly. The idea had probably been in his head for a while now.

"I do not believe that doing so would be appropriate."

"And turning down our proposal when you have no reason to is rude," Bookman Jr. countered, words purposely formal.

Allen considered that, frozen like a buffering streamed video. After another moment of unnatural stillness and silence, he gave Lavi one curt nod. "Very well."

|l|l|

The Moyashi didn't order very much food, and he only nibbled at what was on his plate.

He caught me eyeing his meal. After a brief second, he pushed it in my direction, and asked, "Do you want it?"

I recoiled and glared, feeling disgusted at the prospect of eating that shit. "No."

"You're really skinny. Shouldn't you eat?" Lenalee probed, before taking a sip of something in a disposable cup.

There was truth to her words. His clothing was probably a Small, but if hung off of his body like it was all a size too big. Really, it was painful to look at. I couldn't believe this was my first time noticing that.

"I don't need much. Not anymore." He rested a hand on his stomach, looking down at it blankly. "Shortly after joining Noah, I unintentionally went on a fast. Ever since then, my portion sizes have been gradually decreasing. I'm rarely hungry anymore."

Lenalee's face fell, and she set down her cup. "That can't be healthy."

"It most likely isn't."

After that, it went quiet as we all finished off our meals. Well, they ate -two of them did, at least-. No way was I touching anything from a fast-food joint.

I watched over the small group of three -plus me- while also keeping an eye on our surroundings; it never hurt to be cautious.

That's why I saw Lenalee shooting the kid strange looks. It seemed like she wanted to say something. It wasn't until almost three minutes later that she finally made up her mind.

"You've forgotten."

The Moyashi stayed quiet and waited for her to continue.

"We met you once before. Road told us to stay away, but…" Lenalee set down her cutlery, staring at the kid with worry. "She told us a bit about you."

"I do not understand. What is it you expect to gain from telling me this?"

"Nothing!" She assured him, waving her hands about like an idiot. "We just…"

"I know…" He spoke slowly, as if testing the words in his mouth as he spoke. "I know that I'm… odd… and broken." The Moyashi looked down at his meal, which sat before him barely even touched. "This is the best I am able to do. As long as I can function, nothing else matters."

Lavi, who'd done nothing but listen 'til now, let out a hollow, depreciating chuckle. "You'll live the rest of your life like this?"

"I am prepared to," the kid said, expression unchanging.

The demon's green eye darkened. "That's not living."

"I do not understand. I am alive, and they are alive. Is that not 'living'?"

"That's not what I meant," Lavi muttered, glowering painfully at nothing in particular.

This was irritating, and it was getting us nowhere. Still… "Wasn't there some shit you found fun before Noah made you their bitch?"

Lenalee discretely kicked me in the shin, most likely for the way I'd insensitively phrased my question.

"I…" The Moyashi frowned, but didn't seem to realise he was doing so. "I had… a lover. Back then was… as you would say… fun."

That was surprising. It was hard to imagine anyone wanting this lifeless ghost of a person.

My two clansmen leaned in closer, intrigue written all over their faces. The sadness was still there, though. It was in their eyes.

"What kind of person was she?" Lenalee asked.

"She?"

"Your lover," she clarified with a smile, reaching out with her hands to rest on his, only to pause when he withdrew his from the table and settled them in his lap. She moved her hands back to her own lap.

"My lover was a man, and he was… he is a demon."

Lenalee opened her mouth to speak, but shock kept the words from leaving.

"I found him quite interesting. He… could be very insensitive at times… and was rather rude… but he was good to me." The Moyashi stopped, frown disappearing. "I cannot tell you what I feel now, because I don't know. However, back then, I loved him very much."

I nudged him beneath the table with my foot, stealing back his attention. "And if you could see him again?"

The Moyashi fixed me with an unreadable look. Then again, most of his expressions were that way. "He doesn't remember. I… He should not remember."

That didn't answer the question.

"My betrayal came as a surprise to them," he went on, eyes unnervingly never leaving me. "If he were to remember, he would be very angry. He may break something, or perhaps even hurt someone. I never wished for such a thing."

"It's been seven years. Don't you think you've done enough?" Lenalee queried softly, tone of voice sombre.

"I wanted them to live, and I was willing to do anything to see that happen. I… I'm still… They still need to be protected."

"Is that really your job?"

"They would never have been captured in the first place had they not extended their kindness to me."

|I|I|

Merry nearly-Christmas~

(today is Serendipity's 1st anniversary)