Author's Note:
This chapter is pretty much just fluff and sex. So if that isn't your cup of tea then I suppose I'll see you in the next chapter.
If it is then I hope you enjoy your read, dear reader.
Hotel Paradiso, top floor. February 4th 2183. Midday, standard Earth time.
"Sterilization sequence: complete. Decontamination sequence: complete. Welcome."
The asari sounding VI informed us as the heavy metal doors in front of them slid open, allowing entry from the airlock that sealed off this top tier room of the hotel from the rest of the world.
Swallowing nervously, I glanced at Raenna to gauge her mood. Though to be honest, I was looking for a distraction.
We'd ridden the elevator up the top floor in silence, and I was certain that if I had to listen to the more and more frantic beating of my own heart any longer I'd go crazy.
My quarian companion seemed a lot calmer than I. She was leaning forward with her hands clasped together in front of her, peering into the room with what seemed an equal measure of curiosity and apprehension.
Before getting on the elevator, she'd insisted on carrying the two smaller shopping bags containing the various medicinal items she'd need for when-if, we would decide to be more… intimate, once settled in our room.
Taking in her lithe quarian form and exotic curves, I swallowed hard again as the rising undercurrent of desire I'd felt in anticipation reminded itself rather insistently of its presence.
That and the way her arms pushed her breasts together, I was pretty sure she didn't even realize it herself, made her all the more tantalizing to me; not quite being the distraction I'd been looking for.
I quickly turned my gaze up into the ceiling and exhaled slowly in a not so successful attempt at reining myself in. Just as Raenna's attention turned back to me I cleared my throat and stepped up to flank the door while taking and bringing one of her hands up to my lips as I bowed with as much gentlemanly flair as I could muster.
"Ladies first." I smiled, trying to conceal my amorous mind with humour.
The petite quarian blinked at me in confusion before her luminous eyes widened and then squinted as she giggled. The sideways glance she gave me under hooded eyes as she sashayed past into the room made my throat dry up and a warm tingle dance across my nerves.
Keep going like this, Rae, and I'll have a stroke before second base.
I took a deep breath and followed her into the room.
It was certainly spacious. There seemed to be a theme to it as well as most of the furnishing had a homely look to it with fake wooden details in a rich shade of red, synthetic textile in creamy beige and the odd blacks spread about such as the large sofa arranged around a low 'wooden' table and most of the handles and knobs on the doors and drawers as well as a bunch of other places. The fake wooden floor was the same shade of red as everything else 'wooden'. The wall opposite the door was the same steel colour as most everything I saw on the Normandy, whereas the other walls seemed to be a plain white.
There was a short hallway as you stepped into the 'room', which I now realized was actually more of an apartment, before you came into what seemed to be a combined sitting room and entertainment room.
As I hung my coat and took off my boots I made a mental note of the bag and bulky metal cases neatly stacked in the hallway. At least they'd been quick about doing as they were told and moving my things, despite the infuriating attitude the asari receptionist had demonstrated as she'd realized that I'd not only 'stolen' one of the hotel's more hard working and least paid employees but was now also going to have said ex-employee stay with me at one of their most luxurious suites.
Men men, allt går med lite vilja och våld… I grunted in righteous satisfaction at the pile of items before following the little red wonder into the sitting room.
Off to the right I could see a dining and kitchen area and off to the left was another short hallway to where I assumed the bathroom and bedroom was.
"So..." I started nervously, making my way to the center table. "How do you like it?"
I didn't look at her as I began unpacking the bags, quietly checking the items off as I went.
A minute, maybe more, went by in complete silence but in my rattled state it felt like an hour of anxious waiting. I hadn't been this nervous around a woman since I was a teenager.
Just as I began to contemplate turning around I had to restrain myself from jumping as a pair of slender alien arms snaked around my midsection from behind me.
"Thank you." Raenna's voice was a trembling whisper as she burrowed her visor into my back.
Smiling, I set the bottle of wine I'd just picked up down on the table before turning around.
"You…" I said; gently pushing her away from me before bending down, ow, back says she's tiny, and scooping her up in my arms. "… Don't have to thank me for anything."
She surprised me by letting out a sound that was somewhere in between an angry growl, a frustrated cry and a hard sob before throwing her arms around my neck and yanking herself up against me.
Confused and a great deal concerned, I carried her over to the sofa and sat us down with her sitting in my lap. I frowned as I tentatively patted her back, wracking my brain trying to figure out what I'd done wrong.
I couldn't for the life of me understand how I'd hurt or insulted her. Was it offensive of me to refuse her thanks? If so, then why? Perhaps it was something else entirely?
Realizing that despite what I thought I knew of quarians from the game, I was actually woefully ignorant of their culture. When I really thought about it, all I knew of quarians was a very brief introduction to how they were generally organized as a society and a few biological quirks. That was, when it really came down to it, it.
I knew about the Morning War and a little of how they lost their homeworld but I didn't actually know any of their history or how it had made them who they were today.
A people couldn't be summed up by a single event, however great or terrible it was.
Nor could a person, I glanced down at Raenna, be summed up by her people.
I sighed, ultimately deciding that my knowledge wouldn't help me here, and embraced the now quietly sobbing quarian with a passion. Alternating between whispered apologies and kisses on the top of her hood.
Her small frame shook with each sob for a few minutes until she hiccupped on a quivering sigh, pulling her legs up and curling up into my embrace.
"I'm sorry, sötnos. I didn't mean to hurt you."
"I heard you the first time."
My hand came to an abrupt halt at the raw sound of her voice. Falling silent, I resumed my tender caress while anxiously waiting for the beautiful quarian to pass judgment.
Sniffling, she drew herself up to sit with her back straight, studying me with a piercing scrutiny I hadn't seen in her before. I didn't need to see her face to be able to tell that she was frowning.
"You-" She interrupted herself with a sigh as she closed her eyes and placed her surprisingly slender fingers over the upper right side of her visor in an exasperated display.
A few seconds later she dropped her hand back down, placing it instead on my chest. Her fingers clenched, bundling up the fabric of my shirt as she stared searchingly into my eyes.
"I don't understand you when you say things like that and it's not because you're human and we're different it's because…" she sighed and her shoulders drooped. "… it's because you're… you and we're too different, I don't even…" She stopped herself again, staring silently at where her hand touched my chest.
I closed my eyes as shadows of old hurt mingled with the fresh stab of pain I felt at her words.
The old hurt being dredged up I could understand. I'd heard similar words before from the precious few girls and women I'd cared for or even loved.
I was always too different, I always scared them and they never knew why no matter how desperately I begged and pleaded.
It was always the same and I was sick of it. Sick of being denied because I was simply me.
When I was younger I'd try to hide it. Whatever it was. I tried to be the best I could be. No. Better than the best I could be but the struggle always hurt too much and no matter how hard I tried the mask always inevitably started to crack. And then came the worried frowns, the 'I don't get you's' and lastly the goodbyes and that look that said I'd touched something deep and buried that told them to run.
The last person I'd loved, the last person I'd let in, had been the worst. After her, I promised myself I'd never let someone in that close again. She took a piece of my heart with her and I had let the void she left fill with all the horrible things I imagined she'd seen in me. The damage was already done when she later told me that she had never been scared of me in the sense that she thought I would hurt her. The very idea that she had thought that I could willingly harm her had already broken something in me that should never be broken.
I was surprised to find that hearing Raenna say such words hurt. It worried and scared me.
No, it was terrifying to think that somehow she'd become this precious to me in a single day.
I opened my eyes and realized that it wasn't a matter of whether I could fall in love with her; if I stayed with her I would fall in love. There was no way in hell I was putting either of us through that.
"How could I not thank you?"
Thrown off track, I regarded her with a puzzled frown.
"I can't see why you should. I can't give you anything, I can't…" I tried in vain to swallow the tight knot in my throat. "… I can't stay with you, I can't be what you deserve."
Raenna stared at me with a stricken face behind her visor.
"Can't give-! Look around you, you bosh'tet! You have given me more than anyone ever have! A real job, a real chance to complete my pilgrimage, all of this…" she made a sweeping gesture over the room and the table where the shopping bags with their items lay. "Keelah! You call that nothing?"
I shrugged awkwardly.
"They're just… things. Nothing lasting." I muttered guiltily, avoiding eye contact.
Raenna cupped my face and drew me to her, lightly touching my lips with her mouthpiece before leaning back to gaze into my eyes.
"No, Nehya, they're not just things. They're hope. They're kindness, they're…" She stopped herself and the glowing moonlight of her eyes pierced into mine with a longing that was achingly sweet and painful at the same time.
Every second caught in the light of her eyes was a torturously tender rapture. I was vaguely aware of trying to work my dry mouth to speak.
"… Love?" That one damning word escaped me in a husky whisper before I could stop it.
"Oh…" Raenna let out in a quivering voice before crushing herself against me, hands roaming over me and nuzzling her mouthpiece up against my lips.
I yielded to her assault on my senses immediately, kissing her passionately as my hands and fingers flew over her body; greedily cupping and grasping every supple alien curve.
We bucked and squirmed together until we'd lain down on the sofa. Ragged gasps, growls and moans escaped me as her quarian hands ravished my skin but no matter how or where she touched me it wasn't enough. The slighty warbled Khelish, hoarse moans and gasps that came from the irresistible siren underneath me set my blood ablaze. No matter how my own hands explored and devoured of her suit clad body I would not be sated.
Then Raenna's powerful legs locked around my hip. Her moans became a breathless, needing whimper as she crushed our groins together.
In a rare moment of clarity, I gritted my teeth and pulled away from her. We stared at each other, both our chests heaving in labored arousal.
"We should- haah, haah."
"Bed-haah- room?"
I just nodded as I leaned back breathless, ravishing her still with my eyes. Raenna sat up slowly, a groan of displeasure escaping her.
I had no other warning than a sultry glimpse of mischief in her eyes before she continued her rising motion forward.
She snaked a hand into my underwear and grabbed my aching member, drawing a gasp and a shudder from me. Whatever resolve I had before melted away as she took command and pushed me back and down on the sofa again with her over me.
She pulled at my disheveled clothes, removing them one by one as she caressed me with long, slow strokes. No doubt having noticed the response I gave her every time her fingers passed the base of its head, Raenna clasped my member in a firm grip closer to the tip and started slowly wriggling her fingers over the base of the sensitive cap.
There was no doubt a smug grin on her face; however I was unable to tell as my eyes rolled back from the pleasure she was giving me. I made a half-hearted attempt to get up but she pushed me down again. Hard.
"Do you want me?"
The hint of a chuckle was mercilessly choked out of my throat by the breathless, pleading groan that took its place.
"Yesss-hah-I want you…"
Raenna leaned in close to my face, her shining orbs fluttering as my hands cupped the alluring swell of her breasts
"Mmm, then wait for me."
And before I knew what had happened, she was gone. Leaving me to make the best impression of a fish up on dry land ever made.
Having administered the cocktail of immunobosters, antibiotics and various supplements; Raenna now stood in front of the bathroom mirror, correcting her disheveled realk and all the straps and buckles that Isak's hands had made askew. The calm of her outward appearance as she waited for the medicines to kick in did not reflect how she felt in the slightest.
Her heart was still racing from their session on the sofa. The fact alone that she was just about to be with someone for the first time was turning her nerves frayed and raw.
Keelah, I'm about to let him see my face. I'm about to let a human see my face!
She studied herself critically in the mirror.
What if he thinks I'm ugly? Short women aren't exactly the first choice on the flotilla. What if I'm too…
Quarians and humans are similar in some ways but what if we're not similar in the ways that matter? What if he thinks I'm just too… ugly and alien in all the wrong places?
At this point she couldn't tell whether she was feeling dizzy because her medicine was working or because of how scared she was. Then she thought of the last thing they'd talked about before they'd been too caught up in their desires. She let out a heavy sigh and hung her head as she leaned with her hands tightly gripping the sink.
…Did he tell me he loves me? Is that how humans go about these things? What if he asks me if I love him?
She thought about how he made her feel. She knew that from the very first moment they'd met he'd seen her as a person. Not only that but he'd somehow been intrigued by her. She just barely dared to admit to herself that he'd seemed absolutely fascinated by her. She knew that the moment his mystifying green eyes first met hers.
He'd been kind to her, respectful. Perhaps more importantly he hadn't pitied her and her situation; he'd been outraged and even felt insulted for her sake.
And then he'd helped her in every way that truly mattered even though he himself seemed to think nothing of it. If anything he seemed to be feeling guilty.
That sense of guilt, she thought, might have been what would have made her see him for what he was if he was indeed trying to trick her into something.
She knew in her heart that she had nothing of that sort to fear from him though. Not the way his eyes had looked scared almost witless when his inability to give her any future with him had come up.
But what she and he feared in that regard were two very different things. She didn't fully understand his fear beyond the more rational reasons, but it seemed to revolve more around her than himself; he feared to make her hurt and suffer, without care for however he might suffer.
As for herself, Raenna feared the distance she sensed between them. She couldn't say what it was but she knew already that in the end it wouldn't matter what either of them did or how they would eventually feel for eachother. That distance would drive them apart regardless.
Her fear was to be denied something her heart now yearned for but would soon need no different than her body needed air to live. To be denied that which she wanted and be denied the chance to claim what she wanted.
She drew in a long breath and exhaled slowly.
No, she didn't love him. Even for this hurricane of a romance she'd been swept up in it was too soon.
Not yet. But Keelah, is he making it hard not to.
Drawing herself back up to her full height, modest as it may be, she steeled herself and exited the bathroom. She peeked into the sitting room and noticed that Isak's clothes as well as his own person was gone. The items that they, or rather he, had bought were neatly arranged on the table with the bags tucked away somewhere out of sight.
For a brief moment, Raenna felt her chest tighten before shaking her head.
Don't be silly, he'll be in the bedroom… No, he is in the bedroom.
Marching off in the opposite direction, she made it to the bedroom and stopped dead in her tracks as she first thought it too was empty before she looked further to her right. A breath she hadn't realized she'd been holding in escaped her in a huff as she saw her human standing with his back to her and his hands knit together behind his back looking out the bedroom window. His clothes, save for his underwear, was folded up and placed on the chair sitting in front of the small writing desk that sat up against the window-side wall.
Relieved, but also very nervous again, Raenna slowly walked up to him. He didn't move, but she could tell from how he shifted his weight to his left foot and relaxed his shoulders that he'd heard her coming. When she was next to him he turned and smiled at her.
She couldn't help but smile back despite her nervousness. She felt as though she could bask in the warmth of his smile forever.
"Hey." He called out, softly.
"…Hey." She answered, suddenly feeling shy. Though definitely more sober, this moment was more intimate than anything they'd shared before. Frankly, she felt it was a little daunting. A look of deep worry passed over his features as he took her hand to cradle in one hand while caressing it with his other. He couldn't quite meet her gaze.
"I…" He stopped himself and swallowed nervously. "We've talked about us and, uhm… Why thinking about things long-term is a bad idea… I just want to know that you know what you're getting yourself into with me." Raenna opened her mouth to answer, but Isak wasn't quite done yet as he resumed with a thicker voice laden with emotion.
"I care about you, Rae, I care about you a lot. The last thing I'd ever want to do is hurt you in any way. I don't care if you ask me to spank you, I won't friggin' do it."
He added the last part with a twinkle of laughter in his eyes and voice. "But there's more to it." He continued. "Whether or not I might die fighting isn't a 'maybe'. I've signed on to Shepard's mission. You know, that Alliance commander I mentioned that pulled me out of 'Prime?"
Raenna nodded. The human rogue looked at her with a mixture of regret, guilt and sadness. She immediately decided that she hated seeing him like that.
"I'm shipping out tomorrow, early morning."
The young quarian stared at him in utter shock.
"What?! Why haven't you said anything?" She growled.
"I couldn't figure out how! I-" He sighed and brought a hand up to rake his fingers through his hair.
"… I'm sorry, Rae, I really am."
It was all too much to handle at one time. For some reason she'd thought they'd have more time; a few days at least. Raenna walked over to sit down heavily on the bed, resting her elbows on her knees and cradling her head in her hands. After a little while, she felt the bed give as a much heavier body than her own sat down next to her.
"If you don't want to… y'know, then I'll accept that. I'm not going to lie and say I wasn't looking forward to it because I really was. Still am. That thing I said out there by the sofa? That wasn't just words. I mean, I don't really love you all the way through but I'm also right on the edge of actually falling in love with you. Which is absolutely fucking crazy-"
"Keelah, you have no idea." The distraught quarian muttered. For some reason that stopped the human dead in his tracks.
"Rae…" He started. "… Have I, ah, done a bad thing to you with everything today? I mean I don't think what we've done is exactly common, not even for my people, but I get the feeling that quarians are fairly… reserved, with these kinds of things."
Raenna sighed and looked up at him. The way he looked at her with pained concern made her realize that he blamed himself for whatever trouble he imagined he'd gotten her into. She couldn't help but reach out for him. She let her fingers trail up his jawline, so strong and angular to her quarian eyes but when part of the whole of his face she thought it made him look commanding and dashing. Regal, even.
It wasn't hard for her to imagine him as a chieftain or warrior out of Rannoch's old legends.
The way he sighed and closed his eyes as he leaned into her touch made her want to claim him for herself. A thought that tugged at a painful truth she'd rather not think about right now.
"No." She said softly. "I haven't changed my mind about us, not really. I'm just…" She hesitated, trying to find a way to encompass the vastness of everything that bothered her with words only to find no solution."…I don't know how to deal with something like this."
"Hmpf. That makes two of us."
"As for how quarians 'do things', we certainly don't fall into someone's bed not even an hour after meeting them. Usually it takes time, months at the very least, before we even admit to having more intimate feelings for each other. When we're on pilgrimage we have more leeway with these things. We're supposed try things out, even make mistakes and learn the right way from our experiences.
So relations outside of the flotilla are fairly common but they are almost always 'outside the suit'.
It's very rare that we show are faces to non-quarians and rarer still that we, uhm… have sex. With aliens. Without the suit. You know why most wouldn't risk it, right? What with our immune systems and such…"
His green eyes regarded her with a warm tenderness as he nodded and she scooted closer to him. Looking into the labyrinthine shifts and patterns of color in his human eyes, she felt as though she was trying to read a book with as many pages as there were stars and each page had her on the edge of her seat.
"… As for when we go back home… Aliens aren't allowed onto the flotilla. The interactions my people have with other species don't allow for much opportunity to build relationships of that sort in the first place but even if someone did they'd be regarded as a pariah at best and with a human…" She cast her eyes down, ashamed to admit the ignorance of her own people when she'd seen the error of their assumptions with her own eyes. "… they'd be called deviants to their faces and much worse behind their backs. Few Captains would accept having a crewmember persisting in such inclinations after the pilgrimage."
Isak looked at her sadly but unsurprised.
"I figured it was something like that." He sighed and put an arm around her, pulling her gently into a hug. "That'd be one of the reasons why what we have can only be for today. I could never ask you to give up that much for my sake. It's different for me; I could go it alone without my people if I wanted to and I frankly don't give a shit about what any of them think about whoever sleeps in my bed.
Your people need you just as much as you need them even if they might not have the sense to treasure you as they should. I could never ask you to turn your back on them regardless of my opinion of them as whole."
Raenna pulled away just enough to give him an incredulous stare before huffing and leaning in to nuzzle at his neck.
"And there's the reason why I'm here now." She chuckled.
"I don't get it." The human frowned.
Raenna hummed and started drawing circles across his chest, playing with the sparse fur that covered it. Humans are so hairy.
"You accept me. You accept that I'm quarian and you don't even see a reason to hold it against me."
"There isn't any."
"And yet you're the only one I've met outside the flotilla that haven't kept a close watch on their things when I'm around or expected me to start using you or try to con something out of you the minute you are a little charitable."
"That's just prejudiced and plain dumb. It's not like thievery is hereditary; your people do those things to survive and I've yet to see a quarian refuse a way out of that life so that's an opinion I'll keep.
Besides…" Raenna squirmed a little as she felt the human's strong arms shift her bodily into his lap. Once there she felt a spell of mischief come over her and she twisted her hip just enough to rub against his groin and draw a rasping breath out of him. When he let his free hand migrate up her thigh and all the way up to cradle her 'chin' she felt a renewed heat surge through her blood.
"Mmm…" It was not so much an answer as an expressed desire for more, but her human smiled and took it as such as he leaned closer to peck her mouthpiece.
"…How can anyone hold anything against someone as beautiful as you?"
For once, Raenna was glad for having the suit as she felt her eyes water. She latched her arms around Isak's neck and pressed herself up against him with a passion.
She realized she wanted to kiss this frustratingly attractive human who kept playing on her heart's strings and she never wanted to stop. But first she needed to know.
"Isak?" she asked with trepidation.
"Yes, beautiful?"
She couldn't help but giggle from the jolt of happiness she felt.
"You know where not the same, right?"
"Really? No?" He exclaimed in mock shock, making a silly face.
She cuffed him over the head before giggling and pressing her mouthpiece quickly against his lips.
Then she settled down, giving him a serious look.
"I mean that we're different species and even though we're similar in some ways I'll… not look like the women you might be used to. I just want you to be ready for that and… I don't want us to do this if you're not certain that you… want that…me. Hrm." She finished nervously, worrying her lip as waited for his reply.
The human closed his eyes and drew in a deep breath before letting it out in a sigh.
"Oh, Raenna. If you're worried I'll reject you because you're 'alien' to me; don't be. I find you beautiful right now, you know why? Because beauty, true beauty, is so much more than looks and any man that doesn't understand that isn't worth your time.
Even if your features or your body is alien to what I know as attractive doesn't mean that I can't see beyond those preconceptions and find some attraction in that which is different, because that's really all it'll be; different. And there is much beauty to be found in that which is different."
The young quarian blinked owlishly at the human; stunned that he'd read her thoughts so completely.
"We can start with what I already know. Your hands, for instant, are different than mine…"
He took her hand and drew it to his lips before alternating between gently kneading her palm and running his five fingers against the length of her three.
She noted that while his hands and indeed all of him was much larger than her, the thickness of their digits appeared the same. For a brief moment she wondered if her hands looked manly to him.
"… But they're adorable. Not to mention ridiculously dexterous…" The green of his eyes sparkled with desire as he looked deep into her eyes and his voice grew thick.
"… No hands of any other woman I've ever been with have made me feel the way you do with yours."
Raenna still bit her lip, but not out of nervousness. No, she bit her lip because this damned bosh'tet of a human wouldn't stop making her heart ache and soar with joy from those words that dripped sweeter than turian chocolate from his tongue. She hated him for making her feel so vulnerable, but at the same time…
"Then there's your legs…" he let go of her hand and began caressing her slowly from thigh to ankle
"…Your marvelous, graceful legs…" He said, almost reverently, as he inched closer to where her ear was under the helmet. "…I've been watching them all day because of how sexy the way you walk is…" His husky whisper sent a shiver down her spine. Very soon, she thought, I am done with words.
As he turned to meet her gaze, hooded with desire, she saw a flicker of a deeper warmth in his green eyes. Something that seemed to tell her that in this very moment, she was his whole world. Her breath quivered as he drew up close and if she felt vulnerable before, it was nothing compared to how utterly naked she felt as his gaze pierced her own and seemed to see into the depths of her being; her very spirit laid bare before him.
"Then there's your eyes…" He whispered. "They're like moonlight, and each time I look into them I feel as though I'm drowning in radiant bliss. They're dangerous, your eyes. Because every time I look into them, I waver on the edge of falling in love with you."
Raenna drew a sharp intake of air that came out as a sob as her eyes brimmed over with tears.
Isak looked at her with both worry and adoration. She burrowed her visor into his neck as he hugged her close.
"No, my sweet Raenna, don't cry. I don't ever want to make you cry."
"Oh, re-sob-really? I-It seems to me that's exactly what you want."
"No. Never."
"Then don't say things like that."
"I can't describe how beautiful you are to me?"
"No."
"Well, I shall have to disappoint you then."
"Bosh'tet."
She heard him let out that rumbling chuckle of his and as she lay nestled in against him she wondered how it would feel against her skin when he expressed his mirth that way. Emboldened, she sighed in mixed happiness and nervousness as she pulled out of his embrace and booted up her omni-tool.
My pulse quickened in anticipation as Raenna started tinkering with her omni-tool and making small sweeps over different sections of her suit with the holographic device. The process only took about a minute and when she was done and the orange glow winked out of existence, she placed her hands in her lap and sat still for a moment.
I watched silently as she collected herself. Her shoulders were tense and her chest heaved as she attempted a few steadying breaths before raising her shaking hands to her face. Her fingers actually trembled as she fumbled at the sunset colored visor.
Unable to contain myself and feeling too concerned to sit idle I gently grasped her hands while leaning in to touch her visor with my forehead. Giving her as reassuring a smile as I could, I simply met her gaze while gently kneading her hands in mine. After a few minutes in silence like this, I planted a kiss on each of her hands and sat back.
I didn't want to push her into doing this, regardless of how I desired to see her unmasked.
The mind-boggling enormity of the situation pushed against the back of my mind but I managed to wrestle it back under control. The fact that I was about to see the face of an actual, real quarian was having a serious impact on my nerves. The fact that I was about to go to bed with an actual real life alien appeared, in a sense, utterly insane and my head was spinning at the prospect of doing so.
Jostling with all the thoughts and emotions that added to my own nervousness was a struggle but I managed, smiling fondly at the adorable girl I was facing.
She seemed a little calmer and the hard trembling of her hands had died down to the occasional twitch of her fingers.
"Whenever you're ready, Rae." I spoke softly.
She nodded, raising her hands yet again to grasp at her visor. There was a quiet hissing sound as it came loose. As she removed it and placed it gently beside her, I had to fight myself not to gasp at what I saw.
I had played all three of the Mass Effect games and I had believed I had a pretty good idea of what quarians looked like. A 'pretty good idea' however, did not prepare me for this.
Tucked inside the helmet of her masterfully crafted suit, was a face that looked almost ethereal; more akin to something out of myth than reality.
Her skin was pale, as one might expect, but it also had a luster and sheen to it that seemed otherworldly to my eyes. There was a band of faint, grey freckles sparsely dotted und her eyes and across her nose.
Her features were incredibly delicate and though her eyes hadn't struck me as particularly large before, they certainly stood out in contrast to her small full lips and modest jaw. She had high, aristocratic cheekbones but surprisingly round cheeks that were now flushed read. If I didn't know better I'd have sworn she was a faerie. To this point she looked more human than I'd anticipated, but that was also where the similarities ended.
I couldn't see her ears yet, but her hairline was clearly visible and I was intrigued to find that it was a silvery leaden grey.
Then there were the two thin grooves I'd first mistaken for markings of some sort that ran from her brows to her hairline.
Then of course, there was her eyes. They were breathtaking, luminescent orbs that cemented her alien origin. The general build seemed the same as that of a human eye with whites, irises and pupils. However, the pupils were indistinguishable from the irises that emitted a constant bioluminescent glow that shifted in strength and even pattern of stronger and weaker glowing areas.
I wondered at the reason for this as I could think of no real evolutionary benefit for it and theorized at it must have a social function.
I realized I'd been utterly silent and motionless as I studied her. Raenna's expression was the most raw and naked display of emotion I'd ever seen. There was nothing hidden in her features and it suddenly struck me that having been locked inside her suit for most of her life, she'd probably never developed the subconscious social reflex to 'mask' some if not all emotion and intent.
Seeing the brutally honest display of fear and uncertainty on her anxious, flushed features I was suddenly mortified that I'd caused those feelings.
Swallowing hard, I hesitantly raised a hand to gently draw a single line along her jaw. Raenna gasped and recoiled, the light in her eyes flashing and dancing in yet another way.
"You're the most beautiful thing I've ever seen." I whispered, afraid that my voice wouldn't carry.
Raennas features transformed so completely I barely had time to marvel at the sheer happiness in them before she launched herself at me, locking her lips with mine. I lost myself so completely in the texture of her smooth silky skin, intoxicating taste and exotic scent that I did not at first notice the tears streaming down her face and wetting my skin. Worried, I pulled away just enough to look her in the eyes and free my lips for speech.
"Are you all right, sweetie?"
The overjoyed quarian beamed at me through her tears, flashing a set of teeth that was more predatory than I'd expected, then nodded and sniffled before her lips came questing for mine again.
Assured, I reciprocated her passionate advance with equal fervor. Taking a deep breath of the rich, sweet and vaguely musky scent coming off her skin I sent a silent thanks to whatever forces had put me here as my senses willfully drowned in her alien yet unmistakably female aroma.
Our lips met hungrily for a while, I couldn't say how long, and Raenna's breath grew labored as she mewled and moaned into my mouth. Daring to push for more, I let the tip of my tongue dart out to tease at her lips and was taken by her immediate response as she sent her own tongue fervently exploring and caressing past my lips.
As my hands roamed over her body, she suddenly put a hand up to push weakly against my chest.
We came apart reluctantly, breathing heavily and staring at each other with eyes glistening with desire.
"The-haah-suit."
I cleared my throat and tried to rein in my rampant want for her to conquer my senses again.
"Right. Anything I can, y'know, help out with?"
"Just stay put." Raenna giggled. "I can't concentrate when you're too close." She added with heat, the luminescence of her eyes seeming to flash brighter for a second.
"Right." I chuckled nervously, rubbing the back of my neck.
Her nimble quarian fingers started to push and pull at a myriad latches, seals and releases. Slowly but surely her suit came undone. First off was the helmet, allowing her hair to fall free. I was surprised to see that it was partially braided and made a mental note to ask about it later.
I noted that her ears were pointed and ridged much differently from a human ear. If anything, the overall shape and the ridges of the inside of her ears were a little bat-like. Proportionally speaking however, they weren't much bigger than human ears. Fighting down the desire to reach out and touch them, I stayed put. For the moment resigning myself to devouring her features with my eyes.
As she began to tug at the torso of her suit, she seemed to suddenly become self-conscious about herself and turned her back to me. When she started sliding the suit down over her shoulders, having opened it at the back after a bit of a struggle, I felt it near impossible not to pounce on her.
She kept sliding the suit down and forward, freeing her arms and hands and exposing her back all the way down to where the curve of her hip began.
I swallowed hard, trying my damndest to stave off the lust induced tunnel-vision I was experiencing as every one of my senses committed to the beautiful alien undressing before me.
When she glanced over her shoulder, giving me a look that spoke of both hesitation and want, I couldn't help myself. I sat myself closer, leaning into the nape of her neck and breathing in her scent. My mind descended into a haze and I was somehow both barely and acutely aware of my actions as my fingers drew line upon line up and down her exposed back.
Raenna gasped and leaned into my touch as she sat trembling with her shaking hands covering her breasts. Her breath became ragged as I began to nip and peck teasingly at her neck and shoulder while my hands move to fully caress her. Breathlessly, I whispered her name into her ear while my hands roamed. She slowly let go of her breasts and her hands moved, trembling and twitching, until they found my face.
Faced with yet another irresistible opportunity my hands found their way to her belly and traced the thin twin grooves running up the length of her torso until they rounded her breasts. She let out a tense, raw moan as my hands found their targets, my fingers exploring and caressing her mounds relentlessly.
She raked her fingers through my hair, furiously digging into my scalp as her mouth came around to assault mine. Her lips quivered and her breath blew heavy and laden with lust onto my face as our lips and tongues clashed, sending wave upon wave of pleasure through our blood.
With my hands still cupping and fondling her breasts, I pushed her up against me. Every millimeter of my skin craved her touch and wherever my hands roamed my mind and body was yet hungering for more.
My hands began to migrate down from her breasts, past her belly and finally they probed and fondled at my quarian lover's exposed hips and the small mound between her legs that told me promises of infinite, but by her suit made unattainable, pleasure. I wanted to taste and feel every bit of her and yet her suit still barred the way.
Letting out an aroused and frustrated growl, I began to carefully peel her suit further down her hips until I couldn't reach further down from my position sitting behind her.
I got up and carefully maneuvered myself in front of her, ever mindful of not damaging her suit, and started to tug at it tentatively from the other side.
Somewhere in the part of my brain that was still a place of reason I realized that it was better if she took it off in case my ignorance would cause damage to the for her vital piece of technology. I looked up at her as I knelt in front of her, wordlessly asking her to grant me access to the entirety of her body.
Raenna looked at me with hooded eyes and a face so honestly wanting and filled with desire that I was stunned. Her chest heaved, her tantalizing breasts heaving with it, as she held my gaze for a few torturous seconds before she slowly leaned forward and began to remove that last parts of her suit.
When the last piece had come undone and been added to the neat pile beside the bed, we stared into each other's eyes. I left her discarded suit and walked over to kneel in front of her once again. Our eyes never parted.
I took in her fully exposed body. Her pale, now flushed skin. The exotic curve and shape of her legs as they lay exposed in their entire alien splendor. My hands began exploring her feet. I curiously fondled and kneaded the two large toes with short chitinous claws and continued up, my hands passing and attending to the soles of her feet and the smaller toes with almost transparent claws that were positioned higher up on her three-toed feet. I never was a feet kind of guy and I never quite understood what others saw in it; to me feet were pretty much the least interesting part of a woman.
Now however, with Raenna, I found myself fascinated by them. Or more specifically; hers.
Raenna bit her lip while giving me the cutest most honest smile I'd ever seen as I explored and I couldn't help but smile back a little sheepishly.
My ministrations continued ever upward and my blood boiled with renewed heat as I caressed the odd bend of her legs. Kissing, licking and smelling my way up all the way to her thighs. As soon as I was within reach, Raenna's gloveless, clawed fingers found their way into my hair again. Raking against my scalp as my ministrations took me ever closer to her most private place.
By the time I was little more than a decimeter from her nether region, she was mewling and cooing out my name. She shuddered every now and then as her muscles twitched involuntarily. Her eyes looked at me unfocused and dazed. Her lips were parted as her breath was ragged and hard once more.
I was lost. Lost for words and lost for sense as I drank deep of her scent, taste and feel. I kissed her hungrily but slowly up the inside of her thighs while my hands roamed over her hips and belly.
My destination was in reach and, though clearly alien from what I knew, offered a primal allure I could not resist. However in a moment of mischief I decided to leave her sex waiting for just a bit longer and instead began kissing, licking and nibbling my way up over her mound, traveling in a downward spiral toward her womanhood.
Raenna moaned and writhed, her needing fingers roaming everywhere over my skin that she could reach. When I reached the very top of her sex she suddenly cried out and curled her whole body up against me, holding me in a vice-like grip with both arms and legs. She shook and shuddered, desperately gasping my name and the odd Khelish as she climaxed. Much to my surprise and satisfaction.
With an impish smile that went by unnoticed, I quickly brought my arms to scoop her up and placed her petite, shivering body higher up on the bed. She was somehow still holding onto me for dear life, but I wriggled loose just enough to lower myself to her nether region.
Her vagina certainly looked different from that of a human and just as she herself was so very small compared to me, I felt a twinge of worry as I noticed that she looked small in this area even compared to a human of her size. It may be that our species were simply different in this regard but I decided to be very careful when we got to that part nonetheless.
Shelving those thoughts for moment and drawing in the smell of her arousal, I dove in with delight.
Raenna screamed. At least, she had a vague sense of hearing a scream through the thick haze of raw lust that clouded her mind. She hadn't been in any way prepared for this. Without the suit, every sensation was so potent as to be almost painful. The strong, earthy and just a bit savage smell of human male had filled her nostrils the moment she'd removed her visor.
It, along with the sudden clarity of vision had overwhelmed her and stunned her into silence.
Then, he'd touched her. The feeling of his skin on hers was electrifying. As his hands had roamed across her bare skin, leaving burning and tingling paths in their wake, she'd surrendered to the ecstasy of it all.
Now she was barely able to string together a single coherent thought as her human assaulted her nether region with his mouth and tongue, making her beg and cry and moan in between her screaming crescendos.
She was suddenly given a brief respite from the torturously intense pleasure as she felt his mouth and tongue leave her smoldering privates and migrate up over her body. She reveled in the feel of his strange human hands eagerly exploring her. She looked down at the human rogue as his mouth found her breast and gasped raggedly as he used his lips, tongue and even his blunt human teeth to send yet more waves of pleasure crackling across her nerves. She mewled and called to him softly over the din of desire, wanting to have him close. Wanting to feel his lips on hers again.
Isak let her lust-ridden body rest for a moment as he shifted to lie directly on top of her and gave her a smile that was more tender than any he'd given her before.
His eyes regarded her in a way that touched something deep inside her heart, and she couldn't help herself as her eyes watered and began to brim over.
She could barely see his concerned expression through her blurred vision, but knew it was there regardless.
Always so worried about me, Nehya.
She sobbed and smiled so wide her cheeks hurt as she brought her arms up and around his neck to bring him closer to her. She felt as though she melted into him as they kissed deeply, his arms gathering her into a gentle but passionate embrace.
She hadn't given any real thought to his size before because when she had been confined to her suit it hadn't really been an issue. Now when they lay naked and entwined together, her comparatively diminutive form pressed snugly into his, and she could feel his hard member pressed against her thigh she felt a little fearful of what would come next.
She knew from their first time together this morning that his human organ was at least in function much the same as that of a quarian male. In form however, they were obviously different.
She subconsciously bit his lip as she thought of how the alien shape of his penis would feel inside her.
However she wondered in alarm if she even could take him.
Just as the thought crossed her mind, her human lover's fingers found their way back to her sex; somehow dispelling her fears and replacing them with a feverish need. Raenna relished in his ministrations for a moment before she reached for his member. With heavy, hooded eyes the young quarian studied her human's face as her fingers enclosed around his hard shaft. He let out a stifled groan against gritted teeth and she delighted in feeling his muscles work against her skin all around her, encompassed as she was by his larger body.
Studying his strained expression, she realized just how much effort he was putting into being careful with her.
"Isak…" She purred softly, putting a leg up around his hip and pushing his groin against her hoping he'd pick up on her want.
He looked into her eyes, his dazed and lust filled expression mirroring her own in all but the undercurrent of worry.
"I…" He started hoarsely, swallowing hard before continuing. "…I don't want to hurt you."
A confusing jumble of emotions rose up in her at his words, her eyes glistening with an unshed tear while at the same time a blissful smile lazily pulled at the corners of her mouth.
"Isak…"
"If I'm hurting you you have to tell me. Promise me that, Rae."
"I will…" She tilted her head up to catch his lips, mumbling into his mouth as she deepened the kiss, "… I will."
Their lips stayed together as the large frame above her shifted. She felt positively and a bit lewdly dwarfed by him as he aligned his member with her entrance.
A startled gasp escaped her as she felt the alien tip brush up against her waiting nethers. She braced herself without thinking; her whole body becoming tense in anticipation. She had nothing for it though, as the human merely let his organ brush against her as his hand found its way back down and began to caress her outer sex.
Heat built in her core, becoming a tight knot of electrified nerves, and she writhed and moaned under his touch. When she felt him begin to apply some pressure at her entrance, she was so high on pleasure that she bucked up against him without any regard for the consequence.
A loud scream and a hoarse shout rang out simultaneously as his tip breached her outer ward.
Raennas eyes bugged out, staring wildly at her human lover with her mouth still agape in an overwhelming mix of shock, pain and vivid pleasure.
"Rae? Rae, I'm sor-" She interrupted me with a fierce kiss, letting out a stifled cry still as she applied pressure to my back with her leg. Despite her action, the tip of my member went no further; it probed against her walls but her channel was too tight and tense to give. I couldn't tell if it was simply that her passage was narrower than any woman I'd been with before or if it was some structural difference due to her alien origin, however I realized that I would not fit in her painlessly.
Mortified at the prospect of hurting her, I looked into my quarian lover's eyes and searched her face for clues as to what to do. Her face was a raw mix of emotions so potent that I felt moved to my core.
Her body spoke much clearer however, as she trembled and her hips jerked involuntarily. I gritted my teeth and began to push into her. Her breath that had come in heavy, ragged gasps suddenly hitched and became short, shallow and interspersed with stifled screams and moans. Her passage clenched mercilessly around me, making my intrusion even harsher, as each centimeter I buried in her sex felt like the first breach.
Oh, Keelah! Oh, Keelah, I'll break! I'll break but please don't stop!
Raenna was on the verge of tears as she felt the hot, hard, and alien shape stretch her wider than she would have thought possible without injury. Despite the pain she'd already climaxed once. She felt unbearable full; feeling as though the intruding organ was not only pushing through her body but becoming a presence in her mind.
She sobbed and cried while at the same time wrapping her legs around his waist in a death-grip desperately urging him further into her. Her hands kneaded and pulled hungrily and with reckless abandon at his body. Puckered lines of red appeared on Isak's back as her stubby claws dug into his skin.
A choked grunt escaped her as he, much to her bewilderment, bottomed out inside of her and another orgasm rocked her. Her body shuddering and her mind swimming from her climax, she noticed too late that he was still pushing and in a fell strike of chance the gates to her unready inner chamber convulsed just as the human member pushed against it.
I was amazed at how despite how narrow her channel was; she was able to take me. Just as I was almost fully inside her I felt another obstacle barring my way.
Initially it felt no different than all the others; each little give had been so tumultuous that I could no longer tell if I was maybe too far inside her.
She kept urging me on however, so I pushed on. Too late I noticed how different it felt and as her hot core convulsed with another climax, I slipped inside; burying the full length of my member inside of her.
Raenna shrieked, latching onto me so hard it was actually painful. Shocked and horrified of what I might have done, I stopped moving completely.
Raenna's breathing pattern changed drastically; becoming slow, deep and rhythmic. Her hold finally relaxed to the point where it was no longer causing me pain but she was still clearly not letting me go.
I had a vague idea of what had happened and was so utterly ashamed of myself that I just held her close like this for a few minutes, gathering the courage to face her and what I'd done. Then, just as I opened my mouth to speak, I felt another change take place. Inside her.
Her passage became swollen and even tighter around my shaft and her walls secreted a more viscous fluid that coated my member. My eyes bugged out as I felt what must have been her quarian analogue for a cervix and womb move; the 'cervix' pulsed and crept further down past my tip that had lodged itself there. It was as though her whole inner chamber was distending to devour me.
Then a tingling sensation started in the skin of my shaft that was coated in her secretions. The tingling turned into an intense burn and began to not only seep into my member but also flare out into my testicles.
Perhaps most shocking was what happened next; Raenna let out a guttural grunt as she ground our groins together hard and her whole inside seemed to convulse around me. As she convulsed, her 'womb' contracted and I felt a strange mass of something resembling small, fleshy egg sacks first brush and then push itself to fit snugly around the part of me that was lodged in her inner chamber.
Alarmed, I cupped Raenna's face and made her look at me.
"Rae-haah-what-haah-is happening?"
Raenna looked at me with a broad, deliriously blissful smile. The glow of her irises pulsed faintly.
"You're breeding me, Nehya."
When her body had reacted to the human invasion, Raenna had only been able to think she shouldn't be reacting like this. She wasn't even in season for Keelah's sake!
Once her inner process had begun however, she'd descended into a rapturous bliss.
She should be scared, she thought hazily to herself. Any number of things could go wrong, could be going wrong, but she couldn't stop. She couldn't ask him to stop.
Despite all the unknowns involved because of him being an alien, she gave herself fully to the act; relishing in the feeling of her human lover being joined with her so completely.
Then he'd asked her, his eyes wide with alarm and arousal, what was happening and she'd felt a giddy joy bubbling up inside her.
"You're breeding me, Nehya."
Shock and confusion had swept across his features and his mouth opened as if to speak before he suddenly screwed his eyes shut and gave a stifled shout from behind gritted teeth. Burying his face in her neck he hugged her close with reckless passion, pinning her against his body.
Mewling and cooing into his odd, round ear Raenna felt her senses come ablaze as they truly mated. She could feel his muscles twitch and tremble under her touch as minutes passed, during which he moaned her name breathlessly as his hard member throbbed and much unlike a quarian's (and even more so to her delight) even jerked and moved. Her breath was deep and rhythmic, each breath filling her nose with his scent.
His breath however was fast, irregular and trembling and his lips would quiver as he occasionally pressed them against her neck.
Suddenly his breath hitched and he began to call her name in a rapid string of desperate moans as his hips began to spasm and press his groin against hers hard and seemingly involuntarily. Instinctively, she knew what was happening to her human and shuddered in anticipation.
"Oh, Nehya-Nn-Isak! Fill-Aah! Fill me; make me yours!"
"Raenna!"
Isak spasmed and jerked as he cried out and his member throbbed hard inside of her deepest chamber.
Raenna shuddered and shook from her own climax and braced herself for the rush of his seed but nothing came.
His spasms and throbbing continued for several minutes, during which his moans grew pained and raw.
She began to seriously worry for him, even as the lust induced delirium had her in its grip, but suddenly he cried out again and crushed his lips against hers.
She mewled and moaned into his mouth, eagerly returning the kiss. Then she felt it with joyous clarity against her walls; a rush of liquid traveling up his shaft.
Mashing him against her with the help of her powerful quarian legs, she screamed in unintelligible desire and shock at the foreign sensation inside of her as his thick human seed poured into her inner chamber. His seed, entirely different from the clear and runny quarian analogue, felt so gloriously wrong and indescribably alien inside her as it coated the sensitive membrane of her ovary sacks. The sheer volume of it that his violently throbbing organ was pumping into her had her stunned; her ovary sacks practically swam in it. Her legs shook relentlessly and she whimpered and pleaded unintelligibly as he filled her.
Eventually, the flow died down to a trickle and they both gained a small respite.
Their lips broke apart and they gazed into each other's' eyes with mirrored amazement, lost for words and wearing the same blissful smile.
The night wore on. Though they stayed joined together the lover's from different worlds took their time caressing and exploring the landscape of each other's bodies.
The frantic, desperate pace of their first coupling was replaced by a passionate tenderness as they mated time and time again.
Eventually, the two would part and the young quarian once more be confined to the prison of her suit.
Until that time came however, they savored each moment.
Author's Addendum:
"Men men, allt går med lite vilja och våld" = (roughly) Well, well. Anything goes with a bit of will and force.
It's about as accurate a translation as I can make it but it isn't entirely accurate.
Proverbs, idioms and sayings are tricky to translate.
This particul saying is supposed to be spoken with an air of sarcasm. Especially since the word "våld" is also used when we mean "violence".
So be generous with the sarcasm.
Unless you actually want to creep people out that is. But hey, I won't judge.
"Nehya" = Interesting one. A term of endearment typically used at the beginning of quarian courting.
"Bosh'tet" = Broken thing. A common and to a wide range of situations applied swear-word.
"Realk" = *Hooded clothing.
*(AMOM Canon)In quarian 'medieval' times the word referred to most any kind of hooded clothing but in their 'modern' era it came to be reserved for formal or ceremonial hooded clothing.
In spacefaring times the term has reverted to technically describe any hooded clothes yet still retaining an air of ceremony.
Besides the cultural impact of it being the only kind of clothing besides their suits that quarians wear in present day the term has historical weight in quarian society and it is not unusual for families of note to use designs and colors specific to their line.
Since I'm feeling extremely iffy about making it sound as though I'm bragging about being… well endowed, I'd like to clarify this; Human average medium is on the bigger side of average for a quarian in my verse.
I've never considered myself anything but 'proportionate' in that particular area but I'm not exactly a short or small guy.
Again, I'd like to stress that I'm not bragging or anything but I probably err on the bigger side of average for a human.
Given that Raenna is unusually short and small for a quarian, well… You get the picture.
Bloody hell, this was embarrassing.
I'm also taking the liberty of mostly disregarding the crap quarian face reveal in ME3 because...
come on, I've seen ten year olds do a better job of photoshopping a stock photo. Shame on you Bioware, shame on you.
I'm also taking liberties with quarian reproductive functions (pun intended) because there is no established 'canon' yet in that particular area.
The consequences of interspecies sex will be known in the next chapter.
Wait… is that… is that you, G.R.R. Martin?