I took a tentative step away from the bird. "Why are you here?"

"Come, now," he said, almost jovially. "Is that any way to greet an old friend?"

"Shut up and answer my question." Of all people, I was not going to let this bird boss me around.

"You're probably thinking something like Oh, this bird isn't going to boss me around, are you?" he said, and I felt my face screw up at the accurate guess. "Well, I'd suggest you dial down the ego a bit. Because otherwise…" He let the words hang in the air.

"Otherwise what?" I asked. "You're going to pull six human souls out of nowhere?"

"Hm. And there's that single-mindedness again," he vacantly said, staring off into the distance.

"What do you mean?" I growled.

"Tsk," he chastised. "Always so, so foolish…"

I'd had about enough. I drew my pan. "Do you have anything worth saying," I barked, "or are you just here to spout vaguely important-sounding nonsense at me?"

He sighed. "Nonsense?"

"Sure sounds like nonsense to me." I tapped my pan against my palm. "If any of it was supposed to have a meaning, I'd love to hear it."

"Hmph," he grunted. "Listen here, child. You want to know something? Then shut up and listen."

"No," I said, automatically. "I'm not going to just be quiet and let you pour your idiocy into my ears. I'm going to ask you a question, and you're going to ANSWER it. No more of your dancing around and avoiding everything. I am sick and tired of that, and I'm sure as hell not going to stand for it anymore."

The bird glared down at me. "You- you dare to-?!"

"So," I started, "why are you here?"

"Shut the hell up!" he shouted.

"Go to hell."

He growled at me for a moment. Then, his hand shot out with unnatural speed as he lunged forwards, and he grabbed me by my collar. "You think you're bloody clever, do you?" he said. His other hand was pointed at my temple and glowed with a dull yellow light.

"Hah!" I laughed. "What do you think you're going to do? Kill me? Like that's stopped me before."

Again, he growled, and the light in his hand grew brighter. His hand trembled, like he just couldn't wait to blast my head to pieces. But after a few moments, the light vanished suddenly.

"No," he said. "I'm going to tell you something." He waved his free hand, and what seemed like hundreds of yellow feathers appeared, a swirling tornado around us. They flowed to his back like moths to a flame, slowly forming into a pair of large wings. The wings flapped, an audible rush of air punctuating it, and he took off, carrying me with him.

It was clearly a show of force, a demonstration of his superiority. It was intended to demoralize me, to make sure I was too awed to ask any questions.

Sadly, even knowing that, it was working.

I remained in stunned silence as we flew higher and higher into the air, until he finally stopped ascending and took off to the side instead. "So," he said as seas of lava zoomed past my vision, "are you going to listen?"

This time, it was my turn to growl at him.

He harrumphed. "Good enough."

A hissing sound came from my throat.

"So, you wanted to know why I was here?" he asked. "I'm here to let you know something."

"What is it?" I barked.

"What is it, you ask?" he said. "Well, it's simple. All I want to tell you is this: We've already won."

That caught my ear. "We?" I clarified.

"Hmph," he grunted in response, and then fell silent.

"Whatever," I said. "You say you've won? Try something plausible."

He sighed deeply and shook his head. "You truly are a fool, Chara. Do you think I would say something like that lightly?"

"Absolutely," I immediately responded.

"Insolent bastard!" he yelled. "I am not some base liar!"

"Liar? Maybe not," I admitted. "But base? Absolutely."

"You-!" he started, before abruptly cutting himself off. "Never mind. Rest assured, you will pay the price for this one day."

"Doubt it."

"You think you're invincible?"

"Know," I corrected.

He laughed, a cruel, mocking laugh. "Arrogance will get you nowhere. Not when I've got a bit of an ace up my own sleeve."

I rolled my eyes. "Fine. Tell me what it is, then."

"Ha ha ha!" he laughed, again. "No, no. I'd much rather you find out for yourself. But I'll tell you this: You're going to eat your words. Soon."

Oh, yes. Of course. That didn't sound like a bluff at all. Definitely not. "Yeah, yeah."

"Scoff if you like, but you're under more threat than you seem to want to think," he said.

For a moment, that actually worried me. If he'd found some way around my power, around the resets…

No. That was impossible. Besides, if he had, he wouldn't be acting like this. All this whole show meant was that he didn't actually have anything.

"Heh," I said. "Pull the other one, why don't you?"

"Believe what you will," he said, starting to dive downwards. Why was he…?

Ahead of us, I saw the entrance to Waterfall. Ah.

He dropped almost to the ground to pass through the entrance, and I saw my chance. I swung my pan at him, and was rewarded with a satisfying thwack as it struck his side. He flinched, but he didn't quite let go of me. Damn.

We passed through the entrance and began to rapidly rise again. Damn, damn, damn. Didn't quite dare to hit him again at this altitude. Although, maybe I might as well do so anyways – sure, I'd probably die, but at least I could try to avoid being in this situation in the first place in the next re-

A very familiar sound came from below, and a moment later, a blue spear darted past me, just barely missing the bird.

"What's going on here?" the fish said.

I felt the bird's grip on my collar tighten. "You…" he growled.

"You'd best explain what you're doing, now!" she yelled.

A noise of general annoyance emerged from the bird's mouth, and with a single motion of his talons, he threw me to the side. I nearly landed on the path, but I just barely missed it. At the last moment, though, I reached out towards the cold rock. The impact felt like someone'd stabbed my hands, but I managed to grab on.

Of course, that meant I was now dangling off a precipice with no apparent way to save myself, and the only way I was getting out of this alive was if someone who really hated me decided to help me. Déjà vu…

"If there's a god somewhere out there, he's laughing right now," I muttered to myself. Then, I looked up. Might as well get a good look at what was happening.

For a moment, the bird and the fish remained where they were, unmoving. No one seemed to be paying much attention to me; they were completely fixated on each other.

Then, the bird took off away from the fish. She thrust out a hand, though, and the bird's wings dissipated and he fell to the floor, his soul now green.

"What the-?!" he yelled, before turning back to face the fish.

"Right, punk," she said, "you're not going anywhere until you tell me what you were doing!"

"Hmph," the bird grunted. "Didn't you want the human dead?"

"Yeah, because you were doing such a great job at killing them," she shot back. I noted that she hadn't bothered trying to defend herself from the accusation. That didn't bode well for my immediate future.

The bird remained silent for a second or two. Then, he slowly raised his hand and let a yellowish glow envelop it. "Don't get involved with matters you have no business in."

The fish just scoffed. "Is that a threat?"

Suddenly, the light grew far brighter, and in just a moment it turned into a crescent floating above the bird's hand. "If it has to be."

Before the bird could make a move, though, the fish made her own. A glowing spear cut through the air as it speeded towards the bird. He seemed taken aback momentarily, but before the fish's attack hit him, he sent his own crescent forwards. It cut through the spear easily and proceeded towards the fish. She ducked before it could reach her, and it flew into the wall, causing a loud noise to reverberate through the cavern as a shower of rocks flew free. When it was over, there was a small crater left in the wall.

The fish turned towards the crater, wide-eyed, but she was only distracted momentarily. She gritted her teeth and jabbed a finger towards the bird. A single spear appeared in his hand – apparently, she really was committed to being honorable – but many more appeared around him, all flying right at him.

He was not to be outdone, though. After a moment's confusion, he threw his spear to the ground and clapped his hands together, and feathers shot up from the ground. They spun around him in a whirling tornado, and the fish's spears were sliced to pieces as they approached. Each of the shards flew in a different direction, tiny specks of blue light flying all through the cavern. I had to lower my head to make sure I didn't get hit.

As I looked up again, the bird folded his arms across his chest and the feathers slowly faded away. He looked the fish dead in the eye. "Drop the magic. Now."

"Fuhuhu!" she laughed. "Not a chance!" A sea of blue lights shone on the path. I noticed with a start that my finger was on one of them. I swore and pulled my hand closer to the edge – just in time. Spears erupted upwards from the path, leaving the bird trapped in a small circle. I couldn't help but think that was a bit redundant, but it was certainly intimidating.

"How's that?" the fish boasted.

"Not as good as you think," the bird replied, and with a wave of his hand, a single feather appeared in front of him. It spiraled outwards, cutting through the forest of spears as easily as a saw through string. By the time it finally disappeared, there was a large clearing around the bird.

For a moment, the fish stood there, stunned. Then, her face set into an expression of grim determination (not that kind, of course) and she thrust her hand forwards once more. A wall of spears appeared behind her, casting the cavern in a bright blue light. They flew at the bird in a deadly torrent.

He, however, was unfazed. He simply slammed his palm into the ground, and a square of yellow light appeared on the path in front of him. A torrent of feathers shot upwards out of the square, chopping the spears to shreds.

But a few made it through. The bird quickly raised his hands, conjuring a yellow crescent in each one, and took to deflecting them. He swung with the ferocity of a cornered beast, batting spears away left and right. Again, I lowered my head, just in case.

A moment later, I heard a short scream from the bird. I raised my head back up to see a spear sticking out of his chest. The crescents were gone from his hands, and his face looked half-crazed. "Damn you!" he shouted. "Damn you and damn your bloody soul magic! Damn you and your bloody Royal Guard! Damn you and everything you stand for and love, you filthy, disgusting animal!"

"Heh," the fish replied. "You've lost. Give up."

"Go to hell!" the bird shouted back, and raised his hand into the air. Yellow light gathered in it, so bright it was nearly blinding. But it didn't turn into anything – it just lingered there for a while. The bird's hand was trembling and his eyes screamed murderous rage, but he didn't do anything. Finally, he hissed and the light slowly faded. Then, he lowered his hand and made an odd gesture.

The fish advanced towards him, a smug smirk on her face. And then, suddenly, a figure appeared beside the bird. There were no fancy effects or anything – there was just nothing there one moment, and something the next.

The figure was tall, slightly exceeding the height of the fish – if I had to guess, I'd put it at about the same size as the taller of the two skeletons. It was cloaked head to toe in black – a hooded black robe, a black mask over its face, black boots, black gloves. There was nothing I could see of the newcomer's identity.

It cast a glance at the bird, and a moment later, I felt something change. I couldn't quite put my finger on what it was – I couldn't even describe what, exactly, I'd felt. But the fish's reaction told me everything. Whatever the mysterious figure had done, the fish's soul magic was no longer working.

Then, the figure looked at me. For a moment, its gaze lingered, and an odd feeling came over me. Like I was just being inspected as a thing, like this figure was only interested in me insofar as I was relevant to whatever it was planning. For that moment, I felt like nothing more than an item in some list that person had in their mind.

And then, the figure vanished, as simply as it had arrived, and the feeling went away. The bird swung his hand and his wings reformed. He walked through the entrance to Hotland, took off, and flew away. The fish thrust out her hand in what I assumed was an effort to turn his soul green and stop him, but it clearly hadn't worked, and so he escaped.

And so, we were alone. Me, hanging off a cliff over a seemingly bottomless pit, and the fish, who really, really hated me.

I cleared my throat. "Um. Hello."

She regarded me, coldly. "And why are you here?"

"I don't know!" I said. "Bird carried me here. Ask him why he did it."

For a moment more, she just looked at me. What I saw in her eyes couldn't really be described as hate, as such – it was more like she didn't consider me worthy of even being thought about.

"I failed last time," she finally said. "I won't do that again." She raised her arm, and a spear materialized in it.

"Oh, hell," I moaned to myself, just before she thrust the spear down on my hand. I let go of the cliff with that hand and twisted my body away from the strike, then grabbed back on as she pulled her spear back.

"Look," I yelled, as she prepared for another stab, "I'm hanging off a cliff. How are you even planning to get my soul after you kill me?!"

She stopped mid-attack. For a moment, she hesitated, then she grabbed me with her free hand and tossed me, hard, onto the path. I scrambled to get up as she flung her spear at me. I wasn't quite fast enough, though, and it got me in the leg. Ow. Ah well. After having fought the comedian more times than I could count, this barely even felt unpleasant.

Then, she made a gesture with her hand, and I felt a crushing pressure on my feet. It wasn't like the many other times she'd turned my soul green. Back then, it always just felt like my feet were frozen to the ground – now, it was more like someone'd put a massive weight on them. Too much of this, I thought, and my feet would quite literally be crushed. So that was how much she hated me, huh…

A barrage of spears appeared all around me, but unlike before, none appeared in my hand. She really wasn't giving me any quarter… but I didn't need that. I leaned out of the way of the first spear, then grabbed it as it passed and used it to deflect the next one. Now with a spear, I whirled left and right, blocking spears in a mad frenzy. She was being far more aggressive than in our last fight, but it still wasn't as bad as in my previous runs, and so I could still avoid being hit.

The worst part was, any other time, I'd have appreciated this. But now, I was mainly concerned with the bird, and as fun as fighting the fish was, I couldn't afford to waste time.

"Look," I shouted, blocking a spear, "don't you think you're being a bit hasty here?!" I whirled to the left and sent a spear into the ground. "I mean, c'mon! I helped you back in Hotland! That's gotta count for something, right?"

For a moment, the spears paused, and she hesitated. Then, she waved her hand, and the assault continued.

"Ugh!" I grunted, turning to bat another few spears out of the air. "Please, can you just give me a chance to talk?" It was worth trying. She seemed honorable enough.

The spears paused, again, and she grit her teeth. I could tell that she really, really wanted to just continue trying to kill me, but instead, she barked out "What is it, human?"

Progress. "Look, I'm… I'm sorry about what happened back at your house," I said. "I just really needed anything you could tell me."

Her brow furrowed and her expression twisted even further into anger, but she didn't say anything.

"And, uh," I stuttered, "I know you want my soul. But it doesn't have to be NOW, right? I mean, you want to figure out what's up with that bird too, right?"

"…Yeah," she grunted.

"Well, I do too," I said. "So for now, we've got the same goals. And once we're done with that…" I hesitated for a moment. Given the situation, I hadn't really thought this through. But considering the kind of person she was…

"We could have a rematch," I finished. "After all, first time we fought, I was a bit tired, and I'm sure you were exhausted as hell too from chasing after me. And now, you're coming right out of another fight, and I was just dangling off a cliff. So how about when this is all done, we meet somewhere – hell, let's say right here – and fight each other? We could both arrange to get a bit of rest first, you know, make sure there's no outside factors to affect it. And then, we'd fight, one on one, no holds barred, completely fairly. Figure out once and for all who's better."

As I'd been speaking, her expression had gradually started softening. By the end, it'd turned into an almost cheerful grin. "A rematch, you say?" she asked. "Alright, human! You're on!"

"After we deal with this bird," I reminded her. "OK?"

"Fine," she said. "But you'd better not chicken out!"

"Don't worry," I said. "I won't." And I really wasn't planning to. If anything, I wanted this almost as much as the fish did.

"I'll hold ya to it!" she yelled, and with a wave of her hand, I felt the pressure on my feet disappear. I sighed a small sigh of relief.

With that, she turned and walked away back towards Waterfall. I turned in the opposite direction and headed to Hotland.

There was a smile on my face. I'd gotten a bit of info on the bird. I had an actual lead to follow, no matter how small. And after all this was resolved, I got to have a real, fair fight with the fish!

Yeah, maybe there were still issues. I still wasn't sure how I'd actually deal with the bird, and there was still that cloaked figure to worry about.

But all in all? I'd say I was quite happy with how things were going.