A/N: This was something I took out of Phil's chapter. I had this skit at the beginning where Phil was watching home videos and skipping over scenes from his childhood. It gave away too much too soon, though, so I cut it. This is only one bit of the skit, which was (ironically) cut out of the skit's final product and banished to my "Deleted Scenes" file. Phil's about eight here, and it's super short, but I really just want it out of my way. I'm trying to make space. So here. Enjoy, I suppose.
Disclaimer: I own the things that Craig doesn't.
Shortman Shorts
Home Video
"Hey… Hey, Zack."
"Wha? …Oh, Phil, get that out of here. I'm not in the mood."
"Why do you think I'm here? Smile!"
"I don't want to…"
"Yes you do!"
"Please, Phil, buddy, it's too early for this. Go bug Josh."
"I already tried. He's in the bathroom."
"All the more reason to catch him on video. Maybe then we can finally settle whether he's really a boy or not."
"…What?"
"Never mind. Go get Mom on camera then—Oh, speak of the devil!"
"Mom, smile!"
"What… What's th—Oh, criminy, Phil, get that out of here! I haven't brushed my hair or had coffee or anything! Do you want to scar us all for life?"
"Maybe."
"…Darling, you know I love you, but I have no control of my mouth at six in the morning so you're going to have to back off before I say something we all regret."
"I just wanted to add to the home videos…"
"Okay… Okay, how about, how about you go get some footage of Amanda while she's still asleep? That'd be cute."
"No."
"Dad then?"
"Is he awake?"
"Good morning, my lovely family!"
"Does that answer your question?"
"Ah, shit. Another morning person. Someone, kill it."
"Love you too, dear."
"Eh."
"Oh, Phil, you've got the camera! Great! First day of third grade! You excited?"
"No."
Click.