VAMPIREPRINCESS: lol I havent recieved any threats yet, but I almost cant wait until I get one ;) lol and TECHNICALLY lmao its not a miscarriage at five months, its a stillborn. so there lmao im sorry thats not funny, but at the same time it is :D

FUTURENYPD: for now youll get an update almost every day, ill do my best, but uh come july 26th youll have to wait longer. dont worry, i intend to end whatever story im writing before hand and start a new one when im in a stable place :) ive got you covered lol. and yes, i know that a boy would be cooler, were all tomboys here ;) BUT think about how much more interesting a girl would have been! lol

Casey sat on their bed, thinking back on the last two days with a strange mixture of emotions flowing through her. The radio played softly, Casey couldnt help but sing along with the sweet words that seemed to describe her feelings perfectly.

"You've got a way with me, Somehow you got me to believe, In everything that I could be, I've gotta say--you really got a way"

Elliot stood by the door, where Casey couldnt see him and listened to her singing their song. He remembered it perfectly, dancing in the living room during that first week when she was still trying to wrap her head around moving in with him. That night had been one of the best in his life, it was the night that he knew that he was going to marry her. Her hands timidly clasped in his as he slowly turned her in gentle circles, candles burning and the shades open for everyone to see. Her eyes shimmered with so much energy then, he missed that about her.

"You've got a way it seems, You gave me faith to find my dreams, You'll never know just what that means, Can't you see... you got a way with me..."

She wiped a tear from her cheek and took a shakey breath, but she didnt stop singing. Something inside her was screaming that she needed to continue, to put a voice to the way she felt right now, to continue what she had started with this song. She couldnt stop the visions of Elliot, laying there in that hostpital room, staring at her with no recognition, with none of the love she knew that he had for her. The thought broke her heart a little more, combined with the knowledge that she had lost his child, the most important part of their lives, before he even got a chance to register the good news.

"It's in the way you want me, It's in the way you hold me, The way you show me just what love's made of, It's in the way we make love..."

Elliot didnt even try to stop the tears that were forming in his eyes. He couldnt believe he had allowed himself to hurt her in such a horrible way. He knew that it wasnt his fault that he couldnt pull up his memories but he was ashamed of himself, completely and totally ashamed. He couldnt help but wonder, would she have miscarried still if he hadn't forgotten her? If he recognized her when she walked into that room would she have still passed out in such a harmful way? The image of her laying on the floor of his room flooded his head again, his stomach turned over as he thought about how he had watched her fall. He could still feel pain in his arm from tearing the IV's out of his body so quickly.

"You've got a way with words, You get me smiling even when it hurts, There's no way to measure what your love is worth, I can't believe the way you get through to me..."

Casey closed her eyes and took another breath. She just wanted him to be here with her, to hear all the emotions that she was letting out, to hold her and keep her safe. It was a blessing that he remembered, no matter how long it took, and she didnt think that she could let him go again. Her arms felt empty without him, the bed seemed to be huge, emphasizing how aware she was of the fact that she was utterly alone. She touched a hand to her stomach, it was a completely different sensation now, a feeling of emptiness and failure washing over her. She looked to the door, hoping he would appear in the doorway, his ice blue eyes regarding her with the warmth and love she always saw in them.

"It's in the way you want me, It's in the way you hold me, The way you show me just what love's made of, It's in the way we make love..."

Elliot took a deep breath, he tried to push the images out of his head, not wanting to think of seeing her like that. Not wanting to see her laying, broken and defeated in that hospital room. Just the thought of her being anything but his Casey, his first love, his wife. She was still the source of his strength, still the only woman he saw when he walked down the street, but he worried that she wouldnt be able to recover from such a loss as the one she had just suffered.

"Oh, how I adore you. Like no one before you, I love you just the way you are..."

Casey rested her face in her hands, her voice growing faint as tears fell freely. She just kept thinking about him, she wanted him here with her, to hold her tightly and whisper that everything would be okay. She didnt feel like herself anymore, except when he was with her, even just a hand on her shoulder made her feel as if she could recover, as if she was truly going to be okay. But he wasnt here and she didnt know when he would be back, she didnt even know if he wanted to be back. She knew that the marines was important to him, she just hoped he didnt resent her, for any reason, now that he had been discharged.

"It's in the way you want me, It's in the way you hold me, The way you show me just what love's made of, It's in the way we make love..."

Elliot heard her sobs overcoming the words of the song, he knew that she needed him. He took a deep breath and closed his eyes for a moment, then turned around and looked at her through the doorway. Her beautiful red hair was still wet from her shower, she was sitting on the bed, still in the towel she used, her skin glistening in the afternoon sun.

"It's just the way you are."

Casey looked up, shocked, as she heard Elliot say the last line of the song, the line that had been lost in her tears. She gave him a weak smile and he went to her. She wrapped her arms around him and breathed in the scent of him. He planted small kisses on her shoulders, her neck, smoothing her hair down as he pulled her closer to him. He could feel her tears on his shoulder, her slender arms wrapped around his neck, he could feel her clinging to him as if her life depended on it.

He whispered gentle words, trying desperately to show her that he was there, he wasnt leaving, she would be alright. But he didnt think that was really the problem, he couldnt help but think it was tears for the loss she had suffered, that they had suffered. He just wanted her to see how much more he loved her, how this tragic loss made his love for her multiply with every second. He felt a stronger attachment to her with every second that he held her, crying quietly, in his arms.

Olivia looked at Alex laying on her bed, clad in her t-shirt and underwear, a part of her was relieved to have Alex back in her life, she felt more...together, she felt stronger when Alex was there to help hold her up.

"Liv?"

"Hmmm?"

"What made you call me the other night?"

Olivia looked at her again, her pretty blue eyes were very vulnerable, a sight that not many people got to see. Olivia sighed and looked away, "If you cheat on me like that again-"

"Thats not an answer to my question Olivia."

"Alex, Right now I'm not really sure what the answer to that is. i dont know why I still need you, why I still want to be with you. I just know that I do. I miss you every second of the day, I just want you with me when I'm doing anything that I know we would have done together. But I cant honestly say I have a reason for any of that."

Alex nodded and wrapped her arms and her legs around Olivia's body, "Well, I dont care why you called, I'm just glad you did."

"But I'm serious Alex. I wont take you back a second time if you do that to me again. I understand wanting something new, something bigger and better, but you should at least dump me first."

She could feel Alex nod and kiss her shoulder, "I know baby, I wont. You know I wont."

Elliot woke up and reached for Casey, but he felt nothing on the bed next to him. He was awake instantly, his eyes adjusting quickly to the dark. He looked around the room for her but saw nothing, but his ears quickly picked up on the sound of the shower running. He looked at the clock, it was three forty in the the morning. He frowned and walked to the bathroom. "Casey, baby?" He looked into the shower and he saw her sitting on the floor of the shower, sobbing as the water cascaded down over her. She didnt even look up at him. He stepped into the shower quickly, not bothering to strip out of his clothes, and gathered her into his arms. She wrapped her hands in his shirt instantly, burying her face in his chest. He stood up, pulling her up with him and brushed the stray hairs out of her face. She looked up at him, pressing a small kiss to his jawline, and the look in her eyes made him wish he could erase the last three days of their lives. He picked her up like a child, holding her legs in one arm and her upper body in the other, pulling her close to him. He could feel her heart beating frantically as he walked her back to the bedroom and laid her gently down on the bed. He moved away from her, to take off his soaked clothes, but she whimpered like a child, the sound making him forget any discomfort he was experiencing. He looked down at her, seeing all the need and want in her eyes, and he laid down next to her. Neither of them tried to initiate any sort of sexual play, they were both content with just being near eachother. Casey pressed herself to him, trying to steady her breathing, her heartbeat, trying to slow them enough to match his.

He pulled her as close to him as she could get, fearing he was going to hurt her with the force he was using to hold her to him. She could feel the bruises forming quickly where his arms were holding her to him. But she didnt mind at all, she felt more and more alive with every passing moment. Feeling his heartbeat through her skin and hearing him breathing with her made her feel as if she was healing with every moment. She almost felt as if he was piecing her heart back together, helping her get to the next stage in her life, which was bouncing back from losing their baby. She knew he wasnt angry with her, he didnt resent her, he didnt blame her; but she was angry with herself, she resented herself and she, without question, blamed herself.

He held her close, focusing on making sure she felt the love that he had for her, that he clearly conveyed how happy he was to have her with him, making sure she knew that he was still in love with her, regardless of what had happened.

"Casey, I love you."

She took a deep breath and whispered that she loved him to, the shakey words assuring him that she was still his Casey.