The rest of the week of training flew by. Apparently 22 continuous hours of fighting for your life does create some muscle memory. That or the adrenaline from the fear of going through that scenario again just kept me on my toes. Either way, I'd improved my aim, learned how to use my omni-tool in battle, figured out most of my armors systems, and succeeded in gaining better control of my biotics. I'd even managed to do a biotic charge a couple of times.

I wasn't looking forward to today. I was going to have to explain everything again, and tell everyone that I already knew them. Somehow, I doubted they'd be pleased to learn that. But there wasn't anything I could do about it now. I just hoped I'd have some time to figure out what I was going to say to explain why I hadn't wanted to say anything. Even worse I was going to have to explain why I'd originally been willing to say nothing and let Shepard die.

I was making my way to the room that had been used for our meetings and saw Anderson heading in the same direction from the docks. He must've just arrived...

"Dazac," he greeted me with a nod, "You alright? You look exhausted."

I mumbled out a hello and had to fight back a yawn as I fell into step beside him. "I didn't sleep well," I explained.

He nodded, "I don't blame you. Luckily you won't have to go over your story yet again."

I turned to look at him with a frown. "Why not?" I asked, utterly confused.

"Hackett didn't tell you?" Anderson asked with some surprise, "He sent a copy of almost everything you've written down for us so far, to everyone. Shepard and the entire ground team have read it, as well as Joker, Pressley, and Chakwas. Shepard and I were sent a bit more of the sensitive stuff. I trust you know what is being shared with them for now?"

I blinked at him without answering. Why hadn't they told me about that?! I spent the whole night worrying about how I was going to explain everything they were being told! I groaned aloud at the revelation and brought a hand to my forehead. "Oh, my head..." I muttered.

Anderson gave a sympathetic chuckle, "Don't worry. I'm sure they'll hold off on their questions for later. For now, just focusing on the facts and what we're going to do is the main order of business. Here we are."

I shifted my attention back to my surroundings and found that we were standing at the door to the meeting room. I glanced at Anderson and asked, "They're already here, aren't they?"

He gave a smile and nod, "I'm afraid so. They arrived just under an hour ago and came straight here. I'd been speaking with them via comm's until just ten minutes ago when my shuttle docked. Don't worry, Dazac. Mordin made the recommendation that they not bombard you with questions about anything other than what we're here to discuss right now, namely how we're going to deal with Saren. Once that's been dealt with and Saren's been stopped, we'll focus on the rest of it."

I took a deep breath and let it out, my shoulder slumping slightly. I suppose that was the best I could hope for. Not waiting any longer, Anderson opened the door and stepped in and I followed, forcing my feet to move forward and into the room.

"Well, hey!" I heard Joker say loudly, "If it isn't our resident extra-dimensional traveler!"

"Joker..." Anderson warned.

"Alright, alright, geez," Joker said, "Seriously though, Dazac, you look like you need to lighten up a bit. It can't be all bad right?"

I shook my head and somehow found the will to speak, "No, it isn't. But it hasn't exactly been great either."

"I wouldn't have expected anything different. It must be hard for you," a new voice said.

I looked to who had spoken and there she was, Liara. I've gotta admit, actually seeing her made my mood a bit better as she was one of my favorite characters. Not to mention that the games didn't do her any justice. She looked stunning, and still had an air of innocence about her that wasn't there in the second and third games. I smiled at her and just shrugged, slowly making my way to a seat, feeling everyone's eyes on me as I went.

"It's kind of uncomfortable having you all looking at me," I admitted. I looked up to see most eyes divert away from me, if only slightly.

Wrex however... "Well what do you expect?" the krogan asked, "We get all this crap dumped in our laps and you're the source of it all. Like it or not, all eyes are gonna be on you until we're all satisfied that there's nothing more you can tell us."

"Maybe we should just get the questions out of the way now," Garrus offered.

It was Shepard who saved me then, replying, "No. We've already been over this. Any questions we have for Dazac concerning not vital, or personal matters are going to have to wait until we're on the Normandy and under way."

"I would think you of all people would have questions for him, Shepard," Wrex said, "After-all, he was willing to say nothing and let you die."

Shepard's eyes shifted from Wrex to me, and he met my gaze, staying silent a moment before closing his eyes and speaking, "Yes, he was, and in his position I would have done the same. Making a decision like that is never easy, but he approached the problem logically. Besides, the plan has changed now, so what would have been doesn't matter anymore. For now let's focus on what's coming and how we can save as many lives as possible."

Now, THAT was a load off. Shepard wasn't pissed at me, thank heavens, which meant I wasn't going to have to worry about explaining it. Nihlus cleared his throat and we all looked to him as he began speaking, "We all, obviously have questions for Dazac. I'm sure we all have our doubts as well, since despite what he's accurately predicted so far, nothing that has happened yet is something that couldn't have been planned beforehand."

Well, that was unsettling. I looked at Nihlus worriedly, I thought he did trust me... He met my gaze, "It's not that I don't trust you, Dazac, it's just that the possibility is there."

"It's a pretty slim possibility..." Kaiden said.

"It's still a bit convenient though," Ashley said, "Showing up right before everything started..."

"That's enough," Hackett commanded, "We can discuss these things later. Right now our focus needs to be on stopping Saren. Now, I believe Doctor Solus had something about the Thorian?"

Mordin nodded, "Correct. Thorian seems a fascinating creature, could learn much from it. However, not what we need to speak of. The spores, Thorian releases them, controls those who breathe them in, creates a connection that is apparently shared. Subconscious level of course, no control or awareness of, just a 'feeling' of where others are and their condition, could be quite useful in battle. Drawbacks could be dire however, unknown physical ailments and complications, destabilization of element zero within the body suggests it speeds up decay. Cou-"

"How about we just skip to the part about it's uses against Indoctrination?" Nihlus interrupted Mordin mid rant.

"Of course," Mordin said, seemingly unfazed, "If reality holds true to conventions of the game, spores could possibly be used to resist Indoctrination. Asari that is used by Thorian, Indoctrinated, however, spores and connection to Thorian override influence with stronger influence. Brings whole process to a standstill."

"That is rather interesting," Chakwas said thoughtfully, "From what I understand of what Dazac wrote about the Indoctrination process, it uses signals to affect the brain and alter it. If these spores are able to stop those signals from having an affect on an individual, we might be able to synthesize something for our own people."

"Exactly!" Mordin said with a nod, "Need samples!"

"I take it this means our next stop is Feros?" Shepard asked.

"The decision's up to you, Shepard," Anderson said.

Shepard seemed to think it over before giving a resolute nod, "Feros it is then. We can get these samples, the Cipher, and there should be some Geth data there Tali could use for her pilgrimage, right?"

"Uh, yeah," I said, "But..." I looked to Tali, "If you'd be willing to hold off on returning to the Flotilla after Saren's been dealt with, for at least a couple months, I think there's a much better pilgrimage gift you could get for your people."

Tali's head tilted slightly as she looked at me, apparently curious but not sure of what I was talking about. Shepard spoke up, "That'll be up to her, but it'll have to come later. For now our focus is on Saren."

"It's decided then," Hackett said.

"Good," Anderson said, "Get Dazac done with his training as soon as possible, and then we can get underway."

"It is done," I said immediately. "I'm not sticking around for Nihlus to pull another stunt like the last one."

"Well," Anderson said, "That sounds like there's quite a story there."

"Praeletum ended up spending over twenty hours in an advanced N7 simulation."

Shepard looked at Hackett and then to me before smirking, "A full day? Sounds like fun. At least your aim should be better."

That got a chuckle from everyone. Except for me.

%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

Stepping back onto the Normandy felt better than I'd expected it to. I could now finally say I was on the mission, or at least, a mission. To say the mission it would have to have been the same as the games, but that possibility was well and truly gone at this point. This all still felt like a dream. Maybe I fell asleep and can't wake up for whatever reason. I doubt that though It's too vivid and clear for that.

"So, not only does your aim suck, but things 'malfunction' around you," Joker said, killing my good mood with sarcasm, "Might want to try keeping that stuff to a minimum, yeah? One Shepard's enough to deal with."

I rolled my eyes and spotted Shepard who seemed to have overheard. I smirked as he walked toward the pilot, "My hearing must be going because I could have sworn you just said that my aim sucks, Joker."

"Uh... No I didn't?" Joker said in mock fear as he looked at Shepard.

The Commander shook his head, "Get us out of here Joker... before we get locked into the dock."

I gave a deadpan look at Shepard as he looked over his shoulder at me. "I'm never going to hear the end of that, am I?" I asked.

Shepard gave a shrug while smiling, "Probably not."

"Joy," I said in defeat before turning to the right and heading toward the CIC.

"Dazac," Shepard said, getting my attention. I stopped and turned to see him walking toward me and pointing toward the CIC, "Why don't we go to the Comm room?"

Oh boy... what was it now? I nodded silently and kept walking as Shepard fell into step next to me. Once we were inside and the door had closed, Shepard went and stood in the center of the room. He crossed his arms in front of him and turned to face me. I just waited for him to start speaking about whatever it is he wanted to talk about.

"How are you holding up?" Shepard asked.

I was a bit shocked by the question and simply responded with a, "Huh?"

"I won't pretend to understand your situation," Shepard said, "Even with it so hard to believe, Hackett and Anderson seem to trust you, and that's enough for me. So, going off the assumption it is all true; How are you holding up?"

Wait, Shepard was worried about me? Well, I guess that makes some sense... I took a breath and slowly let it out before responding, "I... I guess it still kinda feels like a dream most of the time. I mean, I can go along with it all now, but..."

"Worried about what'll happen once it really sinks in?" Shepard offered.

I just gave a nod, "Yeah."

"I spoke with Nihlus before we left," Shepard said, "He expressed some concern for what might become of your mental state as things progress, having to adapt to such a huge change in society."

I looked up at him with a frown. My mental state? He didn't think I could handle it? I was handling it! There hadn't been any problems so far, I was doing fine, I wasn't panicking... So what the hell? Now I wanted to ask Nihlus why he was worried about it, but that wasn't possible now that we'd left. Nihlus was staying behind to help coordinate other things with Hackett and Anderson, as well as make sure Mordin had a secure place to work that would be exceedingly difficult to compromise.

"I'm fine," I told Shepard flatly.

He gave a nod and said, "Good." I couldn't tell what he was thinking, so I didn't know if he was worried as well or not. "I'll be around the ship if you need anything," Shepard said, uncrossing his arms and walking past me. I turned as he passed and watched as he stopped at the door and looked over his shoulder, "And welcome to the team, Dazac." And then he was gone.

I took another deep breath and slowly let it out. Shepard's personality wasn't quite what I'd been expecting... then again, he wasn't the only one I'd been surprised by. I wasn't sure how long it was going to take to get to Feros, so I decided that I may as well walk around the ship. I knew the others all had questions for me, so I may as well start telling them what I could now so that it doesn't become awkward later. With my mind made up I set off back toward the cockpit, deciding to deal with Joker first and get it over with.