Daddy's Orders

by NeverUpdates97

Shaylee Jane Napier's life is chaotic. A teenage daddy's girl, she has a mind a little crazier than the average girl in Gotham. The monstrous persona inside her father is slowly creeping out, to influence her own. But in reality, he is just Jack Napier, a man who adores his daughter. Now, he's a psychopathic clown, thanks to the cruel world around them both. {Contains dark themes!}

12. From Lover To Murderer?

NOTE: Contains violence, threat and mild sexual content. There's no detail of sexual activity in here, but it still contains references.

---

Chapter 11 - From Lover to Murderer?

When I arrived home that evening I was unusually quiet. I slumped onto my bed straight away, still in my dress. That beautiful feeling was still filling up inside of me as I beamed up at the ceiling. I gently touched my lips to see if my lipstick hadn't smudged, but it was still perfectly in shape, though it had faded slightly by the end of the night.

That bizarre rush of happiness was still swarming through me, almost like it was refusing to leave me alone. I kept replaying that special moment where Chase kissed me, over and over again in my head, and all it did was make me snuggle up to nothing in particular, grinning happily while I wriggled in a cutie way, although I did cut it out because I didn't want my dress to get creased. I guess I was just over-excited in my tiredness.

Dad peeped through my door about twenty minutes later, wearing his pyjamas but his green-tinged hair was still backcombed like he was dressed for 'work'. I smiled welcomingly as he popped his head round my door.

"Hi, daddy," I sighed happily.

"Hello there, beautiful," Dad grinned. He then came in and shut the door behind him.

My smile faded when I saw he was loosely holding a knife in his hand, making me anxiously sit up and nudge backwards on my bed.

"Dad, wh-why do you have a knife?" I questioned, nervously.

Dad chuckled. "Uhh…because…Shaylee, is this really anything new? Hmm?"

"Well, no, it's just…" I said, backing away some more.

"Shaylee, I'm not gonna hurt ya, am I?" Dad winked at me as he slammed the knife down on my side table. "Don't be silly. Daddy's just got some work done today. Haven't been back that long, still had it in my hand when I came home."

"And it's been glued to your hand ever since?"

"I could say that, although…I had to be careful when I got dressed." That's when we both cracked up laughing. Dad looked at me, lovingly when we calmed down. "Stand up for me, Shay," he said. I did so and flipped my hair back when I stood up. Dad's arms became folded as he continued to grin widely at me. "Aw, don't you just look gorgeous?" Dad whispered. "You look just like your mother." I smiled as I looked down at the floor. "Shay?" Dad began to walk over to me as I looked back up at him. "I sense something, ah, strange in you. Hmm?" Dad was now right above me, and his eyes met mine, twinkling with excitement.

"You could say that," I said.

"I think I know what's coming," Dad chuckled.

"What?" I asked, raising my eyebrows.

"I can just tell by your face, Shay. You've gone all shy, all of a sudden. Gone all weird. Not like you, is it, hmm?"

"Sorry…sorry."

Dad laughed, loudly as he touched my face. "Don't–don't be sorry! Nothing wrong with it, is there? You gonna tell me what's happened that's made you feel, ah…all fuzzy inside? Because that's how you feel isn't it? Hmm?" I couldn't help but grin and glance away, shyly again. "Look at me, sweetheart. Was it Chase, Shaylee?"

I nodded. "Yes, dad," I replied, excitedly.

"I thought so, I thought so…" Dad sniggered under his breath. "Did something happen between you two, huh?"

"Oh, dad, it was so…"

"We both knew this day was going to come," Dad interrupted, before sighing heavily. "Now, Shaylee. Be honest with me."

He started pacing up and down my bedroom, looking like he was thinking hard.

"Yes, dad?" I said.

Dad paused for several long moments, as he muttered under his breath. It was like he was struggling to compile a sentence together. I did that often too. I know now that's what the schizophrenia does, it fucks up your speech sometimes. It's so annoying. He then stood still, looking at the wall before him.

"Now. Did he use protection?" he asked, seriously.

I stared at him. "Wh-what?"

"Did you use protection, my love?" He walked up to me again. "Because you know my main priority is to make sure you're safe, isn't it?"

I put my hand over my mouth as I held back my laughter.

"Dad, do you think we had sex?!" I snorted into my hand.

"Didn't you just say something happened? We all know what you teens are like, Shay, always rushing into things. I just want you to, uh…be honest with your old man. I won't be angry, you know."

"Dad, we didn't have sex!" I laughed, rolling my eyes.

"Oh. Really?" Dad sounded shocked.

"Yeah! Yes, really. We just kissed, that was it." Dad looked at me, curiously. I couldn't help but laugh. "I'm serious!"

"You just kissed?" Dad repeated.

"Y-Yes…yeah. That was it."

"Where?"

"In his garden."

Dad beamed at me as he walked over to me, who was smiling just as wide.

"Aw, honey," Dad said as he kissed my forehead. "Bless ya."

"I can't believe you thought we slept together," I laughed.

"Hey, hey, I'm just looking out for ya. And if you did, I want to know if he's responsible and would protect himself."

"He would…but we didn't, okay, dad? I swear."

"I believe you. Just making sure my little girl is okay and if she is havin' a little fun, to have fun safely."

We both spluttered into giggles.

"Dad, you surely don't think all girls my age are having sex, do you?" I asked, still sniggering.

"Ahh…well, a lot of them are honey. You know what little brats in Gotham are like, doncha?"

"I guess so. How old were you, dad?"

"Hmm?"

"When you did it…you know, uh…for the first time."

"Ahh, well that would be telling, wouldn't it?" Dad winked at me.

"Aw, come on, dad…" I whined.

"I did it when the time was right, pumpkin," Dad giggled.

"Was it with mom?"

Dad roared with laughter, making me jump slightly. "No!" he cried. "No, no, no! Aw, bless ya, Shay, so naïve and innocent…"

"I was just asking," I laughed. "You probably fuck a lot of women anyway, dad."

"Hey! Cheeky monkey!" Dad poked my ribcage playfully, making me squeal and collapse onto my bed. "So what if I do anyway? It's not like I'm with anyone, is it?"

I composed myself from laughter. "Well…no. But just make sure you're taking care of yourself too, dad."

"Shaylee, I am safe! Don't worry. Besides, it doesn't happen a lot."

"I find that hard to believe."

"It really doesn't. Have ya seen me?"

"You're irresistible," I said in a silly breathy voice, making dad laugh sarcastically.

"Oh shush you," he chuckled, jokingly stroking his hair over his ears and giving a cheeky wink. "It doesn't do my mind much good anyway, Shay, if I feel too much…" He shuddered. "To be honest with you, I think my mind isn't letting me…you know...have sex. Of course no one can beat your mother in bed, though…"

"Okay, okay…dad can we please not talk about this?!" I laughed.

"Yeah, yeah…you're right. Enough of this talk about mucky stuff, I'm goin' to bed."

"Me too."

"Sounds like you had a lovely night, anyway, huh? Aw, Shay, get you, gettin' your first kiss an' that."

"Yeah," I sighed. "It was…it was amazing."

"Aw," Dad chuckled, ruffling my hair. "That's my girl."

"What are you planning to do tomorrow?" I asked, stroking my hair back into place.

"Uhh…just thought…I'd uh, go visit Harley."

"Harley?"

My heart suddenly skipped a beat as I stared at dad.

"Yeah…yeah…"

"Who's that?"

"You know. Harley." I shook my head, puzzled. Dad sighed and rolled his eyes. "Harleen," he whispered, hoarsely.

"Oh. Why did you call her Harley?"

"I thought I told ya? I thought you knew…"

"Knew what?!"

"That Harleen…uh…she kinda hates being called that now."

"Why?"

"Because…." Dad sighed again before coming over and locking his eyes into mine. "Remember how I told you that…sometimes…you feel, uh…like someone else? Like it's taking over you? I've told you all about disguises and being a top trickster, right?" I nodded, slowly. "Harleen…is now called Harley…not for short…but more for, uh…because she's a new person…like a new identity."

"Like she's someone else?"

"Precisely. Keep a secret for me? She, ah…she wants to be known as Harley Quinn now…instead of Harleen Quinzel…"

"Harley Quinn?" I frowned at dad, but he didn't seem to notice it.

"Yep. Got it because she used to be an acrobatic in her day. That's why she's so good at getting away. It's fascinating to me…"

"Why are you fascinated with a murderer, dad?!"

I sharply turned my head away as I realised what I just said. I felt my head reel slightly. I waited for dad to explode, but to my surprise he maintained his calm demeanour. He locked his fingers onto my chin and forced my head to look at him and I knew he could see the hatred in my eyes.

"Correction," he stated, calmly. "Ex murderer."

"Dad, how can you say that?! You can't say that! She's…"

"Shush, Shaylee…calm down now. She's fine…isn't daddy allowed to visit old friends now and again, huh?"

"Yes, but…"

"Hmm?"

Dad's impatient glare made me start to stutter. I held my breath so I didn't begin to see red. I didn't want to. Not after such a wonderful night.

I gulped as I managed to mumble, "But…I don't want you to get hurt…and I'm afraid you might because…of her reputation and her…her, uh…"

"Yes?"

"Her insanity."

Dad scoffed. "Honey, you really think she's going to hurt me?" I didn't say anything. "Listen to me. Even if she's tried, and oh how she's tried…" He sniggered. "…she could never take me down. Remember how I said Larry taught me everything, yeah? Well, he sorta taught Harley, too...but…she's not as good at it as me."

"Really?"

"Of course. You believe me, don't you?"

"Y-Yeah." Dad grinned at me as he finally removed his fingers from my chin with a harsh yank. "So you're going to see her tomorrow?" I asked, a little sadly.

"Yes, Shay."

"I thought we were going out tomorrow!"

"We are…I'll visit her in the evening. She and her friend Pamela want a little hangout with me…"

"What are you gonna do?"

"Ahh, who knows? Might go and uh…do some things. We'll have the whole morning together, honey."

"Oh. Okay."

Dad started to make his way out of my bedroom, and as he did I began to unbutton my dress. I twirled around in surprise when dad coughed loudly for my attention. It gave me such a shock I lost the grip on my dress and it fell to my knees, making me squeal and quickly cover myself up, consciously falling onto my bed. Dad sniggered at the sight of my awful attempt to cover myself.

"Careful," he laughed. I looked at him, expectantly, ready for him to leave, but then he spoke, almost in an innocent voice that was rare for dad. "Shay, you're…you're not mad at me, are you, sweetie?"

"About what?"

"About…you know…Harley…"

I secretly felt sick inside my stomach at the thought of dad hanging out with a murderer like Harleen…Harley. But like I've said, I'm not stupid. I wouldn't dare tell him what I thought, especially after he'd turned on me up to that point and made me frightened beyond relief.

I simply shook my head, pretending to beam back at him. Dad looked uncertain, but he quietly left the room anyway. I heard him sigh heavily as he walked away from my door, and I did just the same as I stood to my feet and began to dress myself into my skull-patterned pyjamas.

I went in to say goodnight to dad a few minutes later, but he had already fallen asleep. I went washed off my makeup in the bathroom, and as I observed myself the mirror I felt a swarm of different emotions run through me. For some reason, my face looked ghostly pale like I felt nauseous, but because it was dimly lit in the bathroom the whiteness on my face looked staggered, almost like it was painted on. I shook my head vigorously when I saw it and quickly looked away, blinking hard to obtain my normal vision. I noticed one of dad's knives was gleaming up at me by the side of the sink, which I knew dad had obviously cleaned off, as I could still see a tinge of crimson on the end of the blade.

It's crazy how seeing a knife casually lie around our flat was becoming more and more normal. I knew I shouldn't have been alarmed every time I saw one now and then, but I did. It just filled my head with thoughts of what my dad was doing day in and day out. When we went out, he barely used a knife, and when he did use it, he used it for a long time on somebody. I'd seen him hold a few people at knifepoint and give them a good lecture before he told me to look away. Once I did, all I heard then was wails of stabbing pain and then a lifeless body fall on the ground. It was horrifying, but in a way, it sort of wasn't. It was kind of fascinating in some ways. You all think I'm probably mad, don't you? Well I'm not. I may have a slight mental disorder, but I'm not a maniac. I have weird thoughts and have a little bit of a sadistic sense of humour, but that doesn't mean I'm crazy.

At that moment right there, when I looked in the mirror, I started to believe that dad was becoming insane. I thought about it. He'd been a criminal for the majority of the time I'd been on planet earth, he'd got so used to it and it was becoming an addiction. He was hanging out with an insane criminal, which is pretty terrifying, and he seemed to not care at all. But this wasn't just anyone. This was the woman who shot the mother of his child. Me.

As my mind started filling up more with thoughts of dad…and mom…I began to feel tears trickling down my cheeks. I heard a loud gunshot explode in my head, then I heard mom's distant yells, followed by Harley's laughter…and then…and then…I heard dad's voice…his hazardous voice.

Why does my mind have to do this to me? Why can't it leave me alone? Oh how I wish I was just normal. Just a normal fourteen year old girl. Why couldn't I step back to a few hours before where I did feel normal? When I was having my first kiss and felt like nothing could ever harm me?

Why me?

I hate it. I hate it more than anything in the world.

I quickly grabbed a towel and shoved it into my face, starting to furiously wipe the tears from my eyes. They just wouldn't leave. It kept on replaying until it got louder.

I became defeated.

I sobbed pathetically into the towel, falling to my knees, luckily just missing the knife on the side.

Why are you crying you worthless little girl?

"Shut up!" I yelled. "Shut up!No! Not again! This is the last thing I need right now!"

Pick yourself up you pathetic coward. Why are you so hysterical about your mom anyway? Wasn't she a drinker?

"Shut up…"

A child neglecter?

"Shut up! No!"

Before I knew it I was leaning over forwards so my head was against the cold bathroom tile, which appeared to spinning around the room. I kept the towel over my face as I pounded my head against the floor, I didn't care if I was injuring myself. I would jump of a roof if I had to make the voices stop yelling at me.

Thankfully I didn't hallucinate this time. I just heard voices, they weren't thunderous, but they were still rattling until it felt like there was a Ping-Pong ball ferociously spinning my mind out of control. I felt proud when they quietened a little due to my deep breaths and head pounding against the floor, making me remove the towel and sit up onto my knees, pushing my hair backwards. I lifted my head up and allowed the tears to fall down my face. I shut my eyes tightly closed, making even more tears stream out.

"Think of Chase," I murmured to myself. "Think happy…think happy…think happy, Shaylee…"

I desperately tried to replay myself and Chase kissing in my mind, but nothing seemed to be connecting.

Aw, is the poor little girl crying?

"Fuck off! No!" I screamed.

I gripped my head again as the voice began to increase in volume. I hoped and prayed help would come my way.

Then I saw a darkened shadow in the doorway which stood high above me before it came dashing over my side. I flinched away, startled when I saw it approach. I was in such a horrific state I didn't realise it was dad.

"Shaylee!" he cried, desperately. "Shay! Shay! Look at me! I'm here." I moved away again when he tried to hold me. I was shaking all over, looking at dad like I was looking at the face of death himself. He once again approached me as I continued to curse at the voices, turning away from dad, letting out yells of frustration. "Shaylee!" he said again, trying to pull me backwards by my arm.

"Don't touch me!" I yelled.

"Shaylee, it's me, dad!"

"I know!"

"Why won't you look at me? It's okay, honey, I'm here!"

I panted hard before very nervously glancing at dad again, who had by now knelt down to face me. His face was full of worry, and my quivering breaths alarmed him, backing him edge away, slightly. I stared at him. For some reason, I became scared. The thoughts were still running through my mind of dad's insanity. It clung onto my heart and made it pound with fear, and I backed away even more when he loomed over to me again.

"Dad, please…don't…don't hurt me," I whimpered.

Dad's voice cracked. "Baby, it's me…I'm not gonna…oh my god…are you hallucinating?"

"NO!"

"Shay, calm down…it's okay…it's only me…"

By now I was backed up against the bath, and so there was no escape. Dad towered above me and I let out a little whimper as dad raised his hand.

"No! Dad…don't touch me, please…"

"Shaylee, what's the matter with you?" Dad's voice was quivering. "I'm not gonna hurt you…I would never…"

"But…"

"Don't you dare mention that night. That's over. It's okay now. What's the matter, hmm? Come on…" He kneeled down and gently rubbed my leg, which made me inhale sharply. "Sh, shh-shh…" Dad said, softly. "It's okay, sweetheart, I'm here…"

My head started to gradually clear as I continued to look at dad. I aggressively wiped away my tears and started fidgeting around, taking deep breaths. Dad continued to stroke my leg and shush soothingly, which helped me to calm down. My vision became clearer as it had been blurry because of my tears. I saw dad's face was full of hurt and I looked right into his eyes, which were almost filling up with tears themselves.

"Are you okay now?" Dad asked, gently.

"Y-Yeah…" I said, shakily. "I just…"

"Voices again?"

I nodded frantically, until I couldn't hold it back anymore. I lunged onto dad, sobbing into his chest and wrapping my arms around him. He held me close, rocking me back and forth.

"I'm sorry this keeps happening, dad," I mumbled onto him. "I…I know I shouldn't listen…"

Dad clung me tighter. "Why? What did they say?"

I cried a little more even though I could have screamed. "Nothing…I…I just saw the knife, and…"

"What knife?" Dad asked, sharply.

"The one on the side there…"

I felt dad move it head briskly backwards. "Oh, I see…"

"Dad…it…it sounds pathetic and I know you hate to see me act like this…"

"Hey, hey, hey….shh-hh…I won't be angry, I just want to know, okay?"

I sniffled as I forced my head up to look at him, which he allowed. I shut my eyes to drown out the last remaining voices.

"It just…it made me think of…of you…you know…and how you use it all the time…" Dad looked puzzled, but nodded nevertheless. "And…and I heard mom and…Harleen…sorry Harley…and it just triggered everything…they were calling me worthless…"

"You are not."

"I know I'm not, but they make me think otherwise!"

"I've told you not to listen to them, haven't I?!"

"Yes, and I don't, dad…don't shout at me…but they just wouldn't stop…you know this happens all the time."

"You say…I came to mind?"

"Not really…just about how you use a knife and you kill people…"

"Only people who aren't worth my time."

"I know, and…and it's fine…but…I don't know. It's just the thoughts of Harley…and…and mom…"

"Oh, come 'ere, sweetheart." Dad pulled me into a tight hug and kissed me lightly on my head. "It's okay," he whispered. "It's all over now, huh? Come on."

"I'm sorry, dad…"

"What for? Hey, come on, don't be so hard on yourself…"

"I just hate crumbling in front of you…you've taught me to be tough and not let anyone break me and then this happens…"

"Hey now, Shaylee, shush…this is different. This is something you can't help. Haven't you noticed? This is the only time you're ever weak…it's the same for me, isn't it? Isn't it?"

"I…guess so…but yours is worse than mine…"

"I'm not sure about that anymore."

"What?"

"Shaylee…" Dad sighed, sadly.

"You're the one who won't send me to a doctor."

Dad immediately changed the subject. "What you need is a cuddle to getcha to sleep, hmm? You wanna sleep in my bed tonight? I'll make ya feel better, princess."

"Uhh…"

"You can pretend I'm Chase."

We both suddenly erupted into laughter.

"Oh, dad…" I laughed. "I'm so glad you're not mad."

"No. I'm not." Dad instantly stopped laughing.

"No, no…I mean…mad at me…like angry."

"Why would I be angry? Eh?" Dad winked at me as he lifted up my chin. I finally managed to grin at him. "Now, come on, it's very late. Let's go to sleep, beautiful." Dad stood up, but I didn't find the strength inside of me to get up, too. I rubbed my head so the last little clanging my head drifted away. I looked up to see dad standing in the doorway, smirking at me. I groaned as I flopped my arms on my knees, tiredly. "Are you coming then, Shay?" he asked, brightly. "We have a little outing tomorrow and you don't wanna be tired,do you?"

"No, dad," I said, rubbing my eyes. "But I also don't want my brain racking tomorrow either."

"It won't. You're okay now, aren't ya?"

"Y-Yeah, I'm fine. Just don't want to be reminded of it, really."

"You won't be, baby. Now, Shay, am I going to have to carry you like a five-year-old again?" I beamed at dad, giving him a childish smile and I nodded, fluttering my eyelashes ingenuously. Dad laughed and came sauntering over to me. "Come on, then, little one." He groaned loudly as he picked me up off the ground. Like I was five, I nestled into his chest as he carried me out of the bathroom, using his elbow to switch the light off.

He gently placed me on his bed, and tucked me in. I settled peacefully into dad's double bed (he used to share it with mom) as he went and shut the door, flicking the light off. I got into bed so silently that I didn't even hear him get in next to me.

I swear I saw my life flash in front of me when I heard dad shout "Rah!" as I received a sharp buzz to my belly. I squealed loudly and then I heard dad sniggering like a ten-year-old schoolboy. I felt the covers squirming as dad rolled about laughing, loudly.

"Dad!" I shouted, before I started laughing too.

"Oh, that was just too priceless!" Dad snickered. "Did I give you a fright, huh?"

I then leaped on top of him, and although I could only faintly see him, I found his head, using all my strength to pin him down into a headlock as I lay on my belly, kicking my legs crazily in the air as I held him there, and we were both still guffawing playfully.

"Dad, you little shit!" I howled, grinning. "You did that on purpose!"

"Of course I did!" Dad chuckled. He struggled to move but I kept his head down. "Let me go, Shaylee!" He spluttered into laughter, making me do the same until my stomach hurt. I ended up laughing so hard that I was too weak to hold him. I rolled onto my back and let my laughter gorgeously ring throughout the bedroom as dad broke free. "Ha-ha!" Dad teased. "Made ya let go!"

"Oh, shut up," I giggled.

"Still, that was a smart move, Shay."

"What do you mean?"

"That headlock was forceful as fuck."

"That was the point!"

Dad paused as I felt him pinch my cheek. "You're not really scared of me, are ya?"

"No, I'm not. Only when…you know…that happens, when you breakdown, but…but anyway. No I'm not scared of you. Don't know what happened to me tonight…"

"Stupid schizo–"

"But...I always show you I'm not a whiny bitch. Always gotta come back strong, ya know dad?" I gave him a cheeky wink, despite not being able to see him properly.

"Ah-ha! That's my girl! Showin' me what ya made of!" Dad then grabbed me and harshly knuckled my head, making me squirm frantically. Then he loosened his grip until he just had his arm around me and we were calmly looking up at the ceiling. Once I'd calmed myself, I rested my head on his shoulder and began to close my eyes, though I was still chuckling to myself. I felt dad's head move. "Feel better now, Shay?" he asked.

"Much better, thank you daddy," I answered.

"Oh, good."

"You always make me feel better after a breakdown."

"And you me."

"Hey, we gotta have each other's back's, haven't we, dad?"

"Well said, Shaylee. And uh…I'm sorry about the cause of your…"

"Dad, I'd…rather not talk about it. It'll only make me think about it more and I'll get mad at myself. I'll get mad at Harleen…I mean Harl-ey."

"You shouldn't be mad at her, Shay. You've never even met her."

"I don't need to meet her."

"Maybe ya will one day."

"You said I couldn't go out with you two."

"I know but, uh…ya never know. Maybe you will. Besides, weren't you the one last month asking if you could join us and seemed so excited about it?"

"That was only because at the time I was so eager to go out, I didn't really care then. I didn't think straight. I guess I was just in a better mood. I don't why I said it, to be honest…maybe I was just showing off, dad."

"Huh, some things never change."

"Not if you have a fucked up mind."

Dad chuckled and hugged me closer, pulling the covers over us both.

"Let's not think about it, huh?" Dad whispered. "Let's sleep and forget about it. Remember the good thing that happened tonight."

I beamed brightly. "Yeah…" I paused. "Dad?"

"Yes, darling?"

"I think…no, I know…I really like him."

"Aw, Shay, I know ya do. If you get together, I want to know. Gotta make sure he's looking after you and he's not a total coward."

"I'm sure he would look after me."

"Not as good as me though, huh, Shay?"

"Of course not, daddy."

Dad giggled. "Night, night, my number one."

"Night, dad."

I kept having strange nights like these. One minute, I would feel like I'm in unknown world of happiness, the next minute I'm hearing sheer terror in my mind and screaming the pain away. Then suddenly I'm happy and joking around again. One thing that was good at about these schizophrenic breakdowns is that they didn't last the entire night. Sometimes they did last for several minutes, the longest one I had up to that point was the one where I set the class on fire because I totally lost my cool, but when they were over they seemed like they never happened, unless they were triggered again shortly after.

It was hard not to talk about 'Harley', as every time I did something crazy happened. Dad either went all funny with me, or I started to go mad. The more I thought about it, the more and more disgusted I became with the fact dad was 'hanging out' with her when it was her who killed my mom. It was so hard to keep my mouth shut about it, but I knew if I bombarded my opinions at dad he would get seriously angry. I wasn't sure why he defended an insane woman, but maybe it was because he was turning insane too. For real. But I didn't want to think about it. Surely if he was turning crazy then he would start neglecting and abusing me, right? He never did that. He wouldn't dare, because he knows it would start tormenting my mind again.

The next day, dad woke me up at 9am and we did the usual preening ourselves, nibbling on something small and packing all of our weaponry before we headed out. We only decided to stay in the town that day as dad wanted to avoid the commotion in the City which was highly surprising. All we did was steal a bit of money from a shop's counter, which doesn't sound like much but it was a hell of a load of fun. Dad literally gave me a piggy-back ride as we sprinted away into the street to make our getaway. I was screaming at the top of lungs, showing off the money I had in my grasp. And we got away with it. We were close getting away that time. Some guy stopped us in our tracks and demanded the money. Not sure why he thought he had the right, but never mind. Dad asked me to hold the guy with a gun as he loaded the money into a car we were borrowing, and as usual, he made me look away before he dad shot the guy in the head, and then shoving his body behind a fence, which of course I questioned, but dad seemed to shake it off, like he always does.

Dad let me keep half the money we'd stolen as a reward when we returned home. I decided I'd buy myself a new drawing pad, as I was determined to get myself back into my art work again. I even considered restarting The Adventures of Jane the Slave comic.

As dad sat and watched a movie, I wiped off all my makeup and started to take my pigtails out in front of mom's dressing table mirror. It was then I heard my phone vibrate in my room (yes it vibrates that loudly).

I immediately knew it was Chase.

I dashed out of the room, still with one pigtail tightly in place. I flipped up my phone to discover my predication was correct.

Chase's text read: 'Hey tiger, just thought I'd see how you are and if you wanna see each other real soon? I can't stop thinking about you. Last night was so amazing, you made my birthday just that little extra special. I'm SO glad you don't wanna hold back anymore, but if you want to see each other real soon, just give me a call? It'll probably have to be a weekend though as I have to focus on school as well :(. And remember, if you have anything you want to tell me, you can, I'm here always. See you soon xx. P.S. This video game is so awesome that mom had to bring my breakfast to my room ;) x'

I beamed brightly, looking at the text in my hand. I kept re-reading it for the rest of the day, which dad joked about when we had dinner. I made the dinner that day. I was doing it more often now, as dad seemed to be getting worse at doing simple tasks like that. I didn't question it, but luckily Julia had taught me a few things about cooking so I managed to make simple little meals for us both. Dad joked about how I would come in handy when I had to look after a man myself. I said that I would probably never get married, but if I did live with a guy I'd expect him to do just as much as me. Partnerships are all about equality, am I wrong?

When dad left after dinner to visit Harley, I grumbled on the sofa and kept an eye on the news as I sat and draw on the last two pages of my current drawing pad. I was astonished when nothing came up about her or dad. That didn't stop that James Gordon from showing his gob on the news, though, going on about Gotham Police Force are going to try and improve their order. That made me laugh. It'd be a hundred years before they 'improved.'

After the news had finished, I decided to give Chase a call. He answered almost immediately, the phone only rang twice.

"Hey, Shay!" he said, brightly.

"Oh…oh hey, Chase," I said, slightly startled.

"What's up? You okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine…thought I'd give you a call to make arrangements to meet up? Sorry I didn't reply to your text, uh…got a little distracted…"

"Oh that's okay, by what?"

"By that text."

Chase laughed. "Oh well, I try." I chuckled along with him. "So you okay?"

"Yeah…I'm great. You?"

"After last night, I'm…I'm wonderful."

I felt myself blushing. "Me too." I don't know how, but I just felt him smile down the other end of the phone. "Thank you for everything last night," I said.

"No problem…and Shay…"

"Yeah?"

"I meant every word I said, you know."

"And me."

We both giggled shyly for a few moments before Chase continued. "So when you want to meet?"

"Didn't you say weekends were best?"

"They'd be better, yeah."

"Okay then, I'll try and do Saturday. Depends on what me and my dad are doing, but it should be okay."

"Sounds great."

"Yeah…maybe we could have a go on that game I bought you?"

"Oh yeah! Yeah, I'll teach you, it's so cool!"

"I knew you'd love it. Oh and by the way, is it okay for your mom to try and dye my hair again. This blonde seems to be fading now. I've got a new one, so…"

"Should be no problem."

"…Chase?"

"Yeah?"

"You…you're amazing, you know."

"No, you are."

"I'm really not.

"Oh we're not going to start this argument, are we? You're amazing and that's that."

I giggled as I sat myself up. "I can't be bothered arguing right now."

"Good." Chase began to stammer. "Uh…Shay?"

"Yes?"

"On Saturday…you know if I see you…I'll need to ask you something…"

I grinned widely. "Oh really?"

"Yeah…"

"Chase, listen, if you're gonna ask me what I think you're going to, you might as well ask me now, because…I have the answer."

"I'd rather ask you face to face."

I felt the butterflies fluttering inside me again. "Oh. Okay then, tiger."

Chase chuckled. "Okay, well…I'll see you Saturday then?"

"I can't wait."

"Me neither. See ya, Shaylee…"

"See ya."

"Wait, Shay…."

"Yeah?"

"I…"

"Hmm?"

"I…I love you…"

I sighed lovingly. "I love you, too, Chase."

"Do you really?"

"Of course I do." Chase chuckled, timidly. "Chase? Are you okay?"

"Oh…I'm more than that, Shaylee."

"Aw, bless ya. Well, I'll see you soon."

"Night, night tiger."

I ended the call and let out a squeal of delight as I jumped up and down on the sofa in excitement. Looking up at the ceiling, I allowed the fuzzy feeling to warm me up inside. It certainly helped because it made me fall asleep minutes later.

I did meet Chase that Saturday to do exactly as we'd planned. We sat in front of his huge television screen and competitively played on Chase's highly addictive new video game. It turned out to be more complicated than I imagined, having this plotline that involved tracking down this criminal mastermind. Chase ended up completing all the stages on his own. He didn't laugh at the fact I was so useless at it, instead he just tried to help me, despite hardly any of it paying off.

Julia popped her head round the door halfway through the game session. Chase remained glued to the game, pretending he hadn't seen her.

"Hi, Julia," I greeted.

"Hi, sweetheart," Julia said, smiling. She then rolled her eyes at Chase who was still bashing out the keys on the controller. "Chase!" she addressed, sharply.

Chase paused the game and shot his head towards his mom.

"Yes, mother?" he said, in a silly camp voice making me snort with laughter, and Chase chuckled along with me.

"I'm sorry to interrupt," Julia said, giggling herself, "but I was just wondering when Shaylee wants her hair done?"

"Uhh…" I looked at Chase for answers.

"You want it done now?" he asked, smiling.

"Uhh…well I don't mind, I mean…if it's okay…" I said, not wanting to interrupt the game.

"Of course it is," Chase said.

"Okay then, Julia," I said. "I'll have it done now, if that's okay."

"Sure. We'll do it in the kitchen."

Julia led us both into Chase's kitchen which made the one in my flat look stupidly small. I sat down and Julia began the process of dyeing my hair, which I gave to her from my bag. Chase took a seat and watched me, as he stared at me with his beautiful emerald eyes.

About halfway through the process, Julia blurted out, "You know Shaylee, my son is quite find of you."

Chase put his face into his hands in embarrassment, making me laugh.

"Uhh…what makes you think that?" I asked, grinning at Chase, who put his hand over his mouth and slightly shaking his head.

"Well, I know you two have always got on really well," Julia went on. "You've always been best friends, and now you're both growing up, I was just wondering if anything more will happen between the two of you."

"Mom!" Chase groaned.

"What? I've always said to you that Shaylee is a lovely girl and I'd be over the moon if you two decided to give it go."

I couldn't help but snicker at the fact she called me 'lovely.' Didn't she know what I did in school?

"Mom…" Chase mumbled. "You like to say your opinions, don't you?"

"I'm only saying what you're thinking, son."

"I guess you're right though, mom." Chase then winked at me, but Julia said nothing more about it.

Julia continued with the process until I rinsed my hair in their kitchen sink. I put my hair in a towel while it dried, and Chase and I immediately went back to the video game while Julia got us some snacks.

I waited and waited for Chase to ask me the all important question the whole night, but nothing appeared to come out. I eventually gave up on the fact he was going to ask me out, making me feel miserable inside. Maybe he was a coward after all. How was I going to tell dad that?

That was, until it got to the end of the night, and we both went out into the garden for a cigarette, by now I'd let my damp hair loose on my shoulders. We sat on the very same bench we did just a few days before and I noticed Chase couldn't stop fidgeting about while I remained very still as I smoked tensely.

Chase eventually flicked his finished ciggy away, and then turned his head to me, leaning his arms on his knees. I had also put mine out by then. I smiled brightly at him, and he almost instantly sat up straight and took both my hands, making my heart beat fast.

"You know you're really lucky," he said.

"Why?" I asked.

"My mom is usually very wary of girls I meet, they have to be really special for her to like them."

"Wow, really? I'm very grateful, you know I am, if only she knew the horror I did back in middle school…"

"I think it's best if we don't tell her. I told her you'd left school because you're being home-schooled now, and she actually believed me."

"Really?" I laughed. "She didn't even hear about it on the news or anything?"

"She doesn't watch it. She's not really interested in what's going on in Gotham because it's the same all the time. Crime at every corner."

"Yeah," I sighed, trying not to smirk.

Chase then pulled me up to our feet, still holding my hands. I held my breath as I waited for him to say something.

"So, Shay…" he began, nervously, looking at his feet.

"Chase? Look at me," I said.

Our eyes met and I felt a swarm of that unusual soppy feeling soar through me like a wave.

"Shaylee…" Chase continued. "There's been something I've been wanting to ask you for a long time, and now I know we both have this mutual feeling…I, I feel it's time to ask." I said nothing. I just continued to grin excitedly at him. "Shay, will you..."

"Chase…" He raised his eyebrows, questionably. "I think I know what you're going to ask me…"

"Do you really?" he asked grinning. I giggled. "What is it then, baby girl?"

I beamed, excitedly, feeling that wonderful fuzzy feeling again. "Will I be your girlfriend? Hmm?"

Chase then blushed and chuckled as he sheepishly glanced away. He nodded his head before looking up at me with his heartthrob smile.

I couldn't help myself as I leaped onto him, shrieking excitedly. Chase effortlessly spun around in circles as he laughed, happily. We didn't care that the remaining wetness in my hair flicked onto our faces.

"Yes!" I squealed. "Yes I will!"

Chase put me down and then widened his eyes in excitement.

"Really?"

"Don't sound so surprised, dickhead," I laughed.

"It's just…God I…I was so worried you'd say no."

"Why would I say no?"

"Because…I don't know…"

"You worry too much, don't you?"

"Only about my mom and you."

I squeezed his hand tighter. "You're so lucky you have a mom like her."

"And you're lucky you have a dad like yours."

I chuckled. "Yeah…yeah." I paused as I looked into his gleaming eyes, which were fixated on mine. "I'm so happy…" I whispered.

Chase then gently stroked my face, showing me his gorgeous smile, making the beam on my face impossible to leave. He flipped his fringe over his eye, which always made me feel weak to the knees.

"So am I," he said.

"Oh my god, how soppy do we sound right now?" I chuckled.

"Very," Chase laughed. "But that's okay, isn't it?"

"This is like something out of a movie."

We both laughed as Chase rested his head against mine to calm down. I couldn't help but lift my head so my face brushed against his and before I knew it we were in a gentle kiss. I closed my eyes and allowed myself to transport into that rare world of happiness.

This kiss was different to the first one, because, well we just couldn't stop. The first kiss only lasted about ten seconds, this one felt like we were kissing for minutes. It wasn't that long of course, but I allowed myself to explore kissing as I wasn't used to it. Chase was the only boy I had kissed up to that point, but that doesn't mean to say he'd kissed other girls before me. I knew he had at parties when he'd got drunk. You could tell he had, because he was good at it. Okay, he was better than good. It was almost like he was professional, yet he was only sixteen.

It got to the point where I was practically on my toes as I kissed him, because the adrenaline rush kicked in and made me so enthusiastic. I could feel it from him, too. I felt him smiling.

When we finally came out of it, we paused for a very long time. We just looked at each other. I was so glad my mind wasn't doing anything horrible at that moment, as we all know what happens.

Chase then started to stroke my hands. I knew he was trying to say something, but he voice appeared to be shaking.

"Are you okay?" I asked, gently.

Chase beamed at me. "I'm wonderful." His voice cracked and he immediately looked down at the floor.

I latched into a hug. "Aw, Chase, don't start crying now, you'll make me start," I giggled.

Chase held me close. "I'm fine, I don't know what you're talking about," he laughed. We stayed there for a few spine-tingling moments. "Shall we go tell my mom?" Chase asked.

I perked up my head at him.

"If you really want to," I replied.

"I think she'll want to know."

"Okay then. Chase…am I going to have to go soon?"

"Why what time do you need to be home?"

"It doesn't really matter. I want to be home in time for my dad, though, because…I just need to make sure he'd okay. I need to make us something to eat, too, because he promised me he'd be back in time."

"Well you have been here for hours. Probably getting bored of me, aren't you?"

"No!"

We shared a giggle as he kissed my forehead, gently, which made me giggle even more. Chase pulled away and then comically held out his hand towards me.

"My lady?" he beamed.

I did a silly curtsey as I smiled back at him. "Good sir," I said in a stupid posh voice.

I took his hand and we trotted back into the house. Julia was in the kitchen, cleaning up. She was absolutely overjoyed when Chase informed her of our relationship, squealing like a teenage girl would at a boyband concert. She came and gave us both a tight hug, stating how proud she was of us both and that she just knew it. She almost started crying, but Chase comforted her, like the decent guy he really is. Do all parents say things like 'I just knew it'? That's exactly what dad said.

I wonder what my mom would have thought of Chase. Maybe she would have been too drunk to realise he was there, but I guess she would have liked him. If she could fall in love with someone as troublesome as dad then I guess she could have taken a liking to Chase.

Julia took me home in the car about half an hour later.

"I guess we'll see you soon, Shaylee," she said, as we pulled up on the street where the long line of flats were.

"Yes, I'm sure you will," I replied as I undid my seatbelt. I then looked at Chase, who was holding onto my hand. "See you soon then, tiger," I beamed.

"Mm-hmm," Chase nodded. He then leaned in closer, obviously wanting a kiss, to which of course I obliged. I thought it was going to be a little peck on the lips, but Chase being Chase, he had to give me a full-on passionate kiss on the back seat. I giggled as he kissed me, leaning in closer to him, until he was touching my face as we did it.

"Okay, okay, okay….Chase," Julia called. "I know you two are young and in love and it's all lovely but save all that for when you're alone."

We pulled away from each other as we both sniggered mischievously. I lightly rubbed away my lipstick mark on Chase's lips, before opening the car door.

I turned back to Chase. "I love you," I said, happily.

"I love you," Chase repeated, giving me a wink. "Have a good night."

"You too, hon." I stepped out of the car with my bag swinging on my arm. "Thanks Julia!"

"Not a problem, honey, see you soon," Julia said.

I shut the door behind me and waved joyously to my boyfriend, as the car reversed and then speeded down the road.

Dad wasn't home when I came back in the flat, but I assumed he'd arrive very soon. He came home as I was blow-drying my hair in front of the dressing table mirror. Not greeting me, he walked into sitting room, throwing his pointy shoes off into the corner and repeatedly ruffling his frizzy hair, which appeared to once again be showing his natural brown roots. I switched off the hairdryer as I watched him slump on the sofa, wearing one of his purple coats. He sat there very quietly, with an expression of sadness spread across my face. It made my head start to spin with questions, so I nervously put down the hairdryer as I turned to face him.

"Are you okay, dad?" I asked, timidly. His head slowly turned to face me, but his expression didn't change. He sighed heavily, beginning to fiddle around on the sofa. "Dad, what's wrong?" I asked again, making my voice have a sharper edge.

"I'm fine," he said.

"You don't seem fine."

"I'm fine." He sighed and leaned on his hand. "Oh, Shaylee…" he said, gloomily.

I instantly rushed to his aid. "What's the matter?" I tried to lean on him, affectionately, but he flinched away.

"Nothing, it's just…"

"Please tell me…"

"Ah-da-da-da…let me speak. Just had a shitty day, that's all. Harley went all crazy…"

"Oh for goodness sake."

"And don't you make a comment about that! She just kept going on and on and on about the past and…when your mother was brought into it…I just…"

"What did you do?"

"I, uh…I hit her."

I wasn't really sure what to say. "Oh. Oh right."

"Punched her right in her eye sockets and she tries to pin me down with bazooka."

"A bazooka?" I was flabbergasted. "Really?"

"This is Harley we're talking about." Dad managed to smile.

"I know, but…oh my god, she didn't hurt you, did she?!"

"Of course not, I just threw her against the wall. We were in Ivy's bedroom at the time."

"Ivy?"

"Yeah, Harley's friend."

"I thought that was Pamela."

"It was…well, I thought it was. Got a hammering from her today saying how that wasn't her name no more. It's Ivy now, I don't know, I kinda like Pamela better."

"What is it with everyone changing their names? She must be crazy, too."

"No she's not." Dad's voice became sharp. "No…she's not. Maybe a little, but who cares? She still not as mad as Harley."

"Why are you so upset then, dad?"

"I'm not. I don't feel anything."

I staggered away slightly, beginning to feel my heart beat. I knew he was lying, but the way his voice became suddenly made me nervous.

"Was it the fact that mom was brought into it?" Dad remained silent. "Harley has a nerve to talk about her." I slumped down onto the sofa, folding my arms and staring deviously ahead of me. I suddenly felt a swarm of hatred inside of me. "Scummy little murderer," I hissed under my breath. "Scum of the earth."

"Alright, that's enough," Dad said, abruptly. I sighed in annoyance. "Yes, Shay, it was the fact your mom was brought up and it made me go a little crazy at her but I'm fine, now, really."

"Did you have a breakdown?"

"I'm much more interested in what your day was like." I glanced at dad, who had now formed a smile on his lips, though he still sort of glared at me like I was a misbehaving little kid.

"But, dad…" I stammered.

"I'd rather not talk about it, sweetie. It's…it's hard and I hate getting all emotional, it's starting to bug me. So, if you don't mind…"

"Okay."

I knew I should stand up to my view but I didn't want to provoke dad anymore, as I could feel his stressful presence which is always ugly if it spins out of control.

"Come 'ere, you," he said, outstretching his arm. "Give me a cuddle. It'll cheer me up." I tensely nestled up to him and cuddled him around the belly, and he swooped his arm around my shoulder. "So, Shay," he continued, "did Chase finally get the balls to ask you out, then, hmm?"

I grinned as my face gleamed with happiness.

"Well, dad…yes…yes he did."

Dad raised his eyebrows. "And you said yes?" I nodded excitedly and then dad squeezed me tight, all of sudden having an enthusiastic persona. "Aw!" he squealed. "Finally. So he has got balls, huh?"

"Dad! We've only held it back this long because I was scared! So it's not his fault. It's mine."

"Ah, Shay, bless ya." He pulled me in a bit closer by my shoulders, then lifting up my chin so I was looking at him right in the eyes. "I'm happy for ya, Shay."

"Oh, I'm so glad…" I sighed with relief.

"Shush, shush, shush…nah, I really am happy. Glad my little one has got a nice enough boy who isn't completely frigid and at least has some fight in him."

"He's not a pussy, dad. He told me he beat up Alex. He's had fights in school, he argues a lot with people as well. Not me, though."

"Good on 'im, showing them whose boss. It's almost like you're made for each other, Shay. And…he'll look after ya."

"I'm sure he will."

"So, honey, when am I gonna meet your Prince Charming, huh?"

My heart missed a beat. I stared at dad in shock realisation.

"Uhh…well, uh…"

"Shay, I want to see if this guy's for real and make sure he'll look after my little girl, don't I? Make sure he's a responsible young man."

"Well, dad…uhh…maybe some time soon, then. It all depends when, uh…he's free."

"When will that be?"

"I don't know. Look, dad, wouldn't it be best if we had a few months to get used to each other first…?"

"Get used to each other?" he chuckled. "My darling, you've known him since you were eight years old! Surely you are used to him by now."

"I know, but…I mean get used to each other as boyfriend and girlfriend. I've got to make sure he's perfect for me first before I let him face you, because after seeing you take on Darren Lyons that day I know you're gonna be pretty brutal with guys in my life."

"Correct." Dad sighed, as his smile showcased his foul teeth, making me wince slightly. "Maybe you're right. Although you've been saying for months that he's some kind of god-like boy who has no faults."

"Dad, haven't you always taught me to check things before I make a move?"

I smirked at dad, who burst into laughter at my statement. I giggled along with him too, as he hugged me close.

"Oh, Shay, you do make me laugh," he stated. "Such a little joker, you are. Take after me, doncha?" I nodded. "Alright then, I trust you, but I want to meet him very soon."

"But how?"

"Well he'll just have to pop round for a drink one night won't he?"

I became open-mouthed. "You'd actually let him come here?"

"Yes, now he is your boyfriend, I can accept that. I just don't want your friends round here, Shay, because you know if it gets too loud my mind might get funny with it. Lots of funny memories with that. I guess I'll have to buy some earplugs for when you two are in your bedroom."

I spluttered into laughter, hitting dad on the arm as he laughed just as hard.

"Dad! Don't just assume that's going to happen straight away!"

"If you're anything like your mother, you'll be straight in there."

"Dad!"

We both continued to howl with laughter, completely forgetting the fact that dad had come home feeling depressed.

Once we'd calmed down, I asked, "Right dad, fancy some food, then?"

"That would be marvellous, sweetheart," he cried. "Oh and, uh…I was thinking…"

"Yeah?"

"How about a campfire night? Tomorrow, maybe?"

I leaped onto dad like I was ten again.

"Yes please, daddy!" I squealed.

Dad laughed as he gently pulled me off him. "Okay, okay, consider it done. Haven't had one in a long time, thought it'd be nice to have a little catch-up. Think of it as a celebration for your new relationship."

"Sounds good to me!"

"Look at me, precious." I did so, smiling brightly. He started to pull my newly-dyed hair behind my ears and caress my face. "I'm so proud of you, Shaylee," he said. "Such a smart young girl you are. Coping so well with all the shit in your mind and around you. Thank goodness you have two wonderful men in your life, huh?"

"I don't know where I'd be without you, dad."

"Rotting in Gotham's orphanage, that's where you'd be. And if you did end up there, I'm not saying you will, but if you did…I know I could rely on you to show the little fight you have to everyone."

"Sometimes I just can't control myself."

Dad sighed. "Our stupid minds, eh? They just ruin everything."

"Make us do things…"

"And feel things we don't wanna feel."

"I'm sick of feeling for others. I only feel about you and Chase…and mom. That's it."

"Good girl. You're too right." He kissed me gently on my head. "Now, food?"

"Certainly."

I text Chase just before I went to sleep that night about what dad had asked me about and what I'd decided to do. Chase said he was thankful I said to wait a while because he was nervous about meeting dad. I'd told him he was a little over-protective in some respects.

It was becoming clear to me that dad was becoming somewhat depressed. He came home most nights and grumbled about something or other, but in a way he hadn't done before. He looked like he was going to breakdown crying a lot of the time, but he never did. It was obviously the thought of mom that was depressing him, or the fact that as I was growing older I began to start looking more like her. I think that messed with his head, but it's something I couldn't help. It was sort of strange that he was showing more serious signs of missing her four years after she died, but like I said, I think it was me looking like her that made dad miss her even more. I've always said I hate seeing him like that, but this was on another level, even starting to make me feel his sadness. Luckily, I had Chase and my friends to at least cheer me up when I felt like hanging out but dad didn't seem to have that. He had friends, but not real friends like I did. He had criminal friends, who I guess he saw as people he worked with rather than shared a friendship with. Maybe the stress of getting caught and me being taken away was another factor, but dad was careful to talk about that, as was I. I didn't want to think about it. I certainly didn't want it happening.

Dad and I made a deal the next day during our campfire evening: that I could see Chase on Fridays and Saturdays and the rest of the week we would go out when we felt like it. Spending time with Chase was magical, I always felt like I was a different girl to when I hung out with dad. With dad, I felt like a partner in crime. With Chase, I felt like a normal fourteen year old girl that was in love, because I was. Chase looked after me, and continued with his education, really getting stuck into his art work, but that was the only thing he concentrated on. He didn't bother studying for anything else, which I know his mom got annoyed about, but Chase said art was the only thing he wanted to get a high grade in. On Saturdays, I would help him with some of his little sketches he had to complete for projects, one time creating a huge portrait of a beach that had to use materials in it, as well as just normal paint and pencils. Some Saturday nights, we went out to Jason's (who by the way was the first person to know about me and Chase), but he made sure he didn't invite Alex. Alex was now a high-school dropout anyway who spent all his time smoking marijuana. Chelsea's fifteenth birthday saw me and Chase kiss in front of everyone for the first time, which of course everyone took pictures of. I almost punched Chelsea when she wouldn't delete them off her phone, but I eventually did it myself.

As the months went by, I continually kept watching the news to see if anything about 'Harley' would come up. I don't know why I was so interested, but I wanted to know if she'd been caught. She deserved to be caught and locked up forever. There were a few times she was on the news, one time about how she and this Ivy woman robbed a gym's expensive equipment. Dad admitted to me later that he was involved with it, but he denied it at first. He didn't need to deny it, I would have guesses he'd have done it anyway. He didn't bring back any of the equipment to our flat as Harley took it all for herself.

I started to get more and more frustrated about her. I just wanted her out of the way and out of my dad's life. She was a distraction. I loved being with dad when we went out and provided for us in the fun way, but Harley seemed to be getting more of his attention now. I know my dad was considered the scum of Gotham but she topped all of the lists. She was a monster, not necessarily doing such monstrous things like blowing buildings up and threatening to kill masses of citizens, but she left a child motherless.

Why? Why did she do that?

Was it because she had a legitimate reason to hate her? Because she was jealous? Because she's just plain crazy who has no empathy?

But of course, I never argued about it with dad.

It came to the end of April, and my fifteenth birthday was coming up. Harley still hadn't been caught, neither had this Ivy, but dad hadn't either. Three days before my birthday (a Monday), me and dad had gone out and he took me to the very same gym he'd stolen from. We didn't steal equipment, just some money, but I nicked some energy drinks as well. It was the most we'd had in a while, as dad was joking around on the equipment pretending he was a customer. He even made me help him on the equipment so we convinced the people in there we were there to exercise. Of course, dad kept going for ages with his insane amount of energy, as I casually nicked some dollars right under someone's nose. It's crazy how far dad would go to get what he wanted, it made me realise how sometimes you have to go pretty far to get what you want.

The day before my birthday, Chase text me, requesting we go out for a meal for my birthday to this super-posh restaurant in the City and that he'd pay for everything. At first I got nervous because I'd never been on a date like that before, but at the same time, I was up for all the romantic stuff and showing off my relationship in front of people.

That night, I went in to see dad who was lying on his bed, fiddling with his clothes. He hadn't talked much that day, as he "didn't want to give anything away and keep it as a surprise for my birthday." Surprisingly, dad smiled pleasantly as I came in a shut the door behind me.

"Hi, baby," he said, cheerfully, starting to fidget on the bed a little more.

"Dad, I, uh…just messaged Chase…"

"Oh yes?"

"And uh…he wants to take me out for my birthday tomorrow. To Johnny's, you know the Italian place in the City?"

Dad smirked at me, and I did the same back.

"Oh, isn't that lovely?" he giggled. "Decent guy. I'd have never done something like that for your mother."

My smile slowly disappeared. "Oh. Oh, why…why's that?" I asked.

"I don't know, she wasn't really one for going out on a romantic date and that. We spent most of our time sitting in this flat, just talking."

"Me and Chase do that all the time, he just thought because it's my birthday he'd treat me."

"Aw, well that's, uh…nice, isn't it?"

I nodded. "So can I go?"

"Of course, of course…" I grinned and began to make my way out but dad stopped me in my tracks. "Ah-ah-ah…hang on a second, Shay."

I slowly turned around to face him again. "Yes, dad?"

"Just thinking…you've been together about three months now, hmm?" I nodded. "Well, uh…is now the opportunity for me to finally meet Mr. Perfect?"

"Uh…" I stuttered. "Uh…I guess so…"

"You said you wanted to get used to it first before we met, hmm? And surely you have by now?"

"Well, yeah…it's going perfect at the moment."

"So I presume he'll be coming to pick you up tomorrow evening…you looking all pretty and with your goth looks…how about, uh…just before you go we can have a little chat?"

"Ah…about what?"

"Just for me to get to know him, ask him a few things. Huh, you're not embarrassed, are you?"

"No! No, of course not!"

"So how about it? D'ya think now's the time?"

"Yeah…yeah I guess you're right. But trust me, dad, you have nothing to worry about. He's awesome."

"Of course. Arrange it with him, then?"

"Yeah! Yeah, I'll do it right now."

"Good girl."

He winked at me before I dashed out of the room.

I was surprised to receive a message from Chase that he was totally cool with meeting my dad before we headed off. I did warn him he could ask the creepiest and strangest things but Chase didn't seem to mind.

Not long before that day, I'd bought myself black leather dress with puffy sleeves and it streamed beautifully out to the sides so it trailed behind me as I walked. I decided to wear that for our date, as well as wear my beloved gothic looks again (despite my hair being dyed blonde). Chelsea had also gave me her high-heeled black shoes, which I had yet to worn, so I decided to wear them, too. I got so excited about it, I had to even draw what I was going to look like, and so by the end of the night my arm ached from shading in my picture.

The next morning, dad came peeping through my bedroom door at around nine in the morning. He had a childish grin on his face when I fluttered my eyes open, tiredly. I smiled back at him, as he animatedly came over to the side of my bed, like he was a little boy at Disneyland.

"Happy birthday, my darling!" he whispered, excitedly to me as he kneeled beside my bed.

"Thank you, dad," I giggled.

"I hate to interrupt a fifteen-year-old girl's beauty sleep, but doncha wanna come and see what your old dad has got ya for your birthday?"

I sat up, sluggishly, rubbing my eyes.

"Yes, please, dad," I replied, beaming at him.

"Come on, then," Dad said, leaping to his feet. "We don't have all day! Gotta give ya you're present and then we'll pop up for some fun time, eh?"

I chuckled as I shook my locks into place. "Okay, daddy."

Dad was waiting for me in the sitting room when I entered now wearing my dressing gown and slippers. Dad was stroking a cup of coffee in his hand, which appeared to be the one he'd had the previous night, but I didn't question it. I almost fell over in surprise when I entered the room to see a pile of presents neatly piled on top of each other. They were wrapped in this unusual wrapping paper decorated with playing card designs (I don't know where dad got that from or why he had an obsession with it, but I didn't question it as the paper was beyond awesome). There were about five or six and that may not sound like much but that was a lot for me to have on my birthday, as three presents would be what I received at the most. I was open-mouthed at dad who continued to smirk at me.

"What's all this?!" I exclaimed, as I kneeled down beside the presents.

"They're presents, Shay, what do you think it is?" Dad snickered.

"I know, but…this is a lot, isn't it?"

"Well, you're fifteen now, honey. Becoming a young woman, thought you deserved more, and quite frankly, it's sort of a thank you for cheering me up these past few months as it hasn't been, uh, great."

"Aw, dad, thank you so much," I squeaked.

"No need to thank me. Now come on, open 'em. Don't wanna head out late, do we? You have a date tonight."

I glanced eagerly at the badly-wrapped presents before me. I began to pick up the smallest one.

Suddenly, dad cried out, "Wait!"

"What?" I questioned.

"Save that one 'til last," he instructed.

"Why?"

"Because that's the most important one."

"Oh, okay then."

Dad had bought me a gorgeous purple coat which was quite similar to his, except it wasn't loaded with pockets. It was a fur coat (but not real fur, dad's not that heartless), with black buttons and large collar that I thought might strangle me. He bought me my usual drawing pad and fine-ink pens and a DVD of Raiders of the Lost Ark. Some more clothes followed that, but I got a surprise when a little kiddie plastic tiara, that was obviously from a cosplay costume, fell out along with some jeans. I observed it with a puzzled look, not knowing what to think. It made dad laugh hysterically.

"Dad, how old am I?!" I asked, jokingly, swinging the tiara around in the air.

"Fifteen," he snorted.

"This is for five year olds," I laughed.

"But you like it, don't you? Hmm?"

I sighed. "I…I guess so. It's cute. But why did you get me this?"

"Well, you've always been a little princess," Dad said. "So what's a princess without a tiara?"

"Well if I'm a princess then you're a king," I giggled.

"Hmm…I'd rather be a prince," Dad chuckled.

"But isn't a princess's father a king?" I spluttered into giggles.

"Yes, Shay, but…uh…if I'm royalty of anything then I'm royalty of crime, right?"

"I guess so…and there's nothing wrong with that."

"Of course there isn't. King of Crime just doesn't sound right…Prince of Crime does, however..."

I chuckled spiritedly. "Oh, dad what are you like, huh? But thank you."

"You're most welcome, princess."

I held it in my hands and poked at the cheap plastic diamonds.

"Reminds me of something, actually," I said, placing it on my head, which it surprisingly fit neatly onto.

"What?" Dad asked.

"Uhh…" I began to stammer as I very nearly told dad about The Adventures of Jane the Slave. "Uh...nothing, nothing."

It then got to the last present and just before I could place my hands on it, dad suddenly rose from the sofa, coughing loudly as he kneeled beside me.

"Ah-da-da, wait a minute," he said.

"Dad, what is it?" I said, impatiently.

He tensely place his hand on the present and lifted it slowly.

"Be very careful when opening this one," he explained. "It's very delicate. It's precious."

"I will," I replied.

It didn't really apply because slammed it right into my hand, which startled me. He looked at me, expectantly, and I nervously teared off the wrapping paper.

I gasped in shock. There in my hand lay a simple black handgun, and out of the paper fell a packet of bullets onto the carpet.

For once, I was lost for words. I gripped it in my hand and naturally pointed it in a random direction. I heard dad laugh and I snapped my head in his direction.

"Woah!" I exclaimed.

"Do you like it, baby?" he asked.

"Uh, yeah, yeah I love it, dad," I answered, truthfully admiring it in my hand. "But…why…?"

"Well, uh, when we go out you always have to use one of mine, don't you, huh? So, I thought…I'd get you your very own for your birthday, because…well…you…" He coughed. "You know how to use one now. You're not a little girl anymore."

"Hey dad, I still remember the day you explained to me what a gun does."

"Oh yeah." Dad chuckled quietly. "And that was the very first day I knew…I knew you'd be a little fighter. So, what d'ya think?"

"Well, thank you so much, dad," I beamed. "I really do like it. Where'd you get it from, anyway?"

"Hey, hey, now…that's for me to know and you to–"

"Be fascinated with?"

Dad pinched my cheek. "Exactly. Just use it your advantage." I jumped when dad suddenly grabbed my arm which had the gun in my hand. He made me put the gun to his head and firmly kept his grip there. I felt my heart start to pound, even though I knew the gun had no bullets in it. "Just watch the faces on the people you do this do," Dad continued, his voice sounding the most callous it had ever been. I didn't dare show my nervousness, so I held my breath as dad continued. "If you use a gun in front of a crowd, it makes everything get too much…" A devious smirk appeared on his lips. "You enjoy that, don't you? When everything goes crazy and people are running around like little cowards?"

"When all the attention is on me," I replied, shakily.

"I know you love that. So, I thought I'd give you your own little device that, uh…you can use to show people that you're no sweet and innocent teenager, hmm? Something of your own, instead of having to borrow mine. You are your own little criminal, aren't ya?"

"I wouldn't say that…"

"Yes. Yes you are." Dad pointed the gun deeper into his head. I didn't notice that I'd started smirking as well. "See? I can see that little smile on ya face. That tells me everything. You happy with your little gift, sweetheart?"

"Yes, dad, I…I guess I won't have to be a pest anymore and borrow yours."

"That's my girl. My little criminal."

"Dad…"

"Shush, shush, shush…it's nothing to ashamed of, is it?"

"Well…"

"No. It's not."

"Dad, why are you pointing the gun to your head?"

He raised his eyebrows, as he glanced upwards, probably to the voices. He paused for a while, probably listening to them. They were obviously saying some pretty crazy things.

"Uhh…because why not?" Dad said. "Now, just a little question for ya, Shaylee. If you had a guy like this…or even a gal…and you had them there because she was threatening to call the cops because you'd done a little something…but all of a sudden she's begging….she's begging that she won't tell now after you've given her a good talking. But your mind's telling you not to trust her, because you can't." Dad got more and more worked up, he even started shaking the gun vigorously making my hand shudder along with it, as he emphasised his words. Although I felt the tension, I also couldn't take my eyes off my father. I know I shouldn't have found it mesmerising, but I sort of did. "So what would ya do?" he asked. "What would you do to the person? Are they worth your time?"

"Is anyone worth my time?" I scoffed. "I don't think so."

"Good girl. That's correct. So what would you do, princess, hmm?"

I thought about it. I knew what dad wanted to hear, but I was smart enough to know what I should really do in that situation. The genuine thing to do would be to let her go. But you know me. Sometimes my heart can't be kind. Plus, I just had to give the answer dad was looking for.

"She'd…she'd have to go," I replied, quietly. For some reason I was still grinning. "I'd have to kill her. Right?"

"Now we're talkin'."

"Really?"

"We've had misery all our lives, haven't we?" I stayed quiet. "Haven't we?"

"Yes, dad."

"Should we be the only ones in Gotham who have terrible lives because of the things we have to go through? The things we've experienced…the horror of it…no. No, we can't be the only people who deserve it."

"So if we make other people's lives bad…I mean, people who deserve it and people we don't like the look of…if we make their lives a misery…that will make us feel better? Is that what you're saying?"

Finally, dad lowered my hand holding the gun, removing it from his head and made me put it down.

"You're exactly correct," he said.

"But not all people surely, dad?"

"Of course not. But I tell ya, Shaylee, one day, you'll see how hypocritical the people in Gotham are. How one day, everything I do…that we do…showing people their true colours and…showing people how pathetic they really are…one day it'll all show. And pay off. It'll pay off real good. And it's fun, right?"

"Yeah!"

"You are a little rebel, aren't ya?" We both sniggered as dad ruffled my hair. "Now, birthday girl, shall we get a move on as you need to be back to prepare yourself for this, uh…this wonderful date with Mr. Heartthrob?"

"Yeah, let's…let's go!" I exclaimed. "Can I use my new gun as well?"

"Of course you may. That's the whole point, isn't it?"

"Okay then."

"Oh. And you might wanna start using it for real now."

"Dad, I…"

"Shh-hh. Come on."

Dad made his way out of the room while I sat there clutching my gun. I stroked it, delicately and admired how new it looked. I placed it carefully on the side, next to the picture of my grandmother before starting to get myself ready.

I wore my new purple coat that dad had bought me, along with my tight black jeans and my hoop earring I'd stolen two years before that. As I was tying my hair in pigtails, dad came and joined me wearing his own purple coat. He was already gripping onto a gun, and his hair was placed neatly over his ears. I wore Chelsea's high heels and wore heavy gothic makeup, grooming myself for a while in the mirror, before dad was literally dragging me out the flat and down to the bus station to start our little 'bonding time' down in the City.

Although I took my new gun with me, I didn't use it. I had it hidden behind my back while I waited for dad outside the bank but I never actually used it on anyone that day and of course I didn't fire it. Dad stole over $400 that day, despite him constantly insisting he wasn't interested in money, and let me have $300 of it as an extra birthday gift. We ventured to the little park and dad dared me to push this little boy off the swings and steal it from him. Luckily, his parents weren't there so I did exactly that. To be fair to the kid, he did try and take me on and fight me but the poor little mite had no chance. Dad and I found the whole thing highly amusing, with dad later saying that that kid was going to grow up to be 'the big man'. He was like the mini version of Darren Lyons.

We arrived home around 4pm, and I immediately went to sleep before meeting up with Chase that evening. Just before I dozed off, however, I checked my phone and had about five messages saying 'Happy Birthday, Shaylee!' Chase's said: 'Happy birthday baby, hope everything is okay and you've received everything you've wanted. Can't wait to see you tonight and to meet your dad. Is that still all okay btw? I'm quite nervous about tbh, as I know you've said he's a bit crazy, but I'm sure he'll be cool. Probably where you get it from, eh? ;). I love you loads, beautiful, see you later.'

At least then I could go to sleep peacefully. He was such a gentleman. I was incredibly lucky to have a boy who just appreciated me instead of staying well away from me because of my annoying disorders. I still wasn't going to tell Chase about dad's criminal ways, but I did reply to him saying it was all going to be fine. Because…it was, wasn't it? I mean, dad wasn't going to lash out at him if he made a slight joke, was he? He wouldn't do that to me.

I did get a little nervous about it, though, because dad doesn't care about anyone. Apart from me…but surely, if he cared about me he wouldn't be an asshole to my boyfriend, would he?

Chase was due to come round at six, have a chat with dad and then we'd leave to get the bus at 6:45 to get to our booked table for 7pm.

I was pacing up and down the sitting room, already wearing my dress that I'd bought for the date. Despite my high heels, it was hard not to tread on my dress as I walked. I was biting my nails which I had painted black, and my hair, which had grown quite long now, was flopped over my shoulders but still flowing behind my back. I had made my hair wavy for the date, which mom had taught me to do as a little girl. Back in the days when she was sober.

The flat was freezing, so I rubbed my arms as I glanced eagerly at the clock. 6:05pm it read.

"Shaylee!" Dad called from the kitchen, making me jump.

"Yeah?" I called back.

"When is Prince Charming coming, then? I thought princes were always on time to visit their princesses!"

"Dad, it's…it's only five past, he'll be here real soon!"

"I should hope so, because I don't want him standing you up! Then I'll know what he's like before I even meet him!"

"Trust me, okay, dad? He'll be here any minute." I was right. About a minute later, the door knocked loudly. "He's here!" I cried, excitedly dashing to the front door.

I nearly tripped over my dress when I reached it, but I managed to stand upright by the time I swung the door open. There stood my boyfriend, dressed in a gorgeous suit and bowtie, with his hair combed neatly in front of his face with his floppy black and red-tinted fringe over his eye. Despite that, he still had his school rucksack on his back. Boys will be boys.

We both gasped in unison at the sight of each other. I couldn't believe how smart he looked, as I'd never seen him dressed smartly before.

"Oh Shaylee, you look beautiful," he gasped.

"You look…you look gorgeous," I cried, putting my hand to my mouth.

"My mom bought it for me," Chase said. "She told me if I'm going to somewhere as posh as Johnny's, then I have to get dressed up."

"Oh right," I giggled. "Come in, come in."

Chase came into the flat and respectfully wiped his feet on the carpet as I shut the door behind him.

"Do I need to take my shoes off?" he asked.

"Oh no, no," I said. "That's okay."

Chase smiled as he leaned in closer to me.

"Happy birthday, baby," he said, sweetly.

"Thank you," I blushed.

We giggled and shared a light kiss before I clung onto him in a tight hug. He held me close while he looked around our little one-floor isolated flat.

"Cute little flat you've got here, honey," Chase said.

"Yeah," I sighed. "It's not much, but it's home. It's fine for me and dad."

"As long as you're comfortable, that's the main thing."

I heard dad cough sharply from the kitchen.

"Shaylee? Is Chase here, darling?" he called.

"Yes, dad," I answered. I came out of the hug and took Chase's hand. "This way." I exhaled slowly before I lead him into the kitchen, where dad was waiting patiently at the table, a mug of coffee in his hand. I hoped and prayed Chase wouldn't notice a knife lying about, but to my surprise I couldn't spot any. Dad had obviously put them away for safety. He's not dumb, he wouldn't want to give Chase the wrong impression, would he?

Dad looked up when we entered the kitchen and smiled pleasantly.

"Dad, this is Chase," I introduced.

"Nice to meet you, Mr. Napier," Chase said, graciously.

He held out his hand to dad for a handshake and dad stood slowly to his feet, observing Chase from head to toe. He sauntered over to us both, looking carefully at Chase. I held my breath to see dad's first impression of him, but thankfully dad smiled at him and shook his hand in return.

"My pleasure, young man," Dad said. "Please, take a seat."

Dad pulled out the chair for him and Chase let go of my hand to sit down. Dad walked over to the cupboards.

"Dad, where am I supposed to sit?" I asked.

"Ahh, you can just stand up, can't you, sweetie?" Dad replied. Chase cracked up laughing.

"Oh, alright then," I said, laughing myself.

"D'ya wanna drink, Chase?" Dad asked.

"Oh no, I'm fine thanks, Mr. Napier," Chase answered.

"Nothing?" Dad turned around. "Not even a coffee?"

"I'm fine, honestly. We'll have a drink while we're out."

Dad nodded and took a seat, so he was facing him. He leaned in on the table, fidgeting in his chair to make himself comfortable. It was almost like he was preparing for a serious interrogation, but then again dad was about to bombard him with questions.

"Firstly, you can call me J," Dad said. "I insist."

"J?" I chuckled. "Dad, why can't he just call you Jack, which is in fact your name?"

"Ah, he can call me that if he wants," Dad replied. "But I prefer J."

"Since when?" I asked, puzzled.

"Since quite recently, honey. And you were right, Shay, he is a smashing lookin' guy isn't he?"

"I'm…I'm not really," Chase mumbled, but laughed nevertheless.

"Ah, you are. Now then. Chase."

"Yes?" Chase said, still managing to smile at dad.

"You've become quite a frequent name in this flat."

Chase's eyes widened. "Have I?"

"Oh yes. My Shaylee, she just won't ever shut up about you."

Chase looked at me questionably. I had my hand leaning on my face, trying to hide myself.

"What sort of things does she say?" Chase asked.

"Oh, it's all…it's all good things, young man. She tells me you're a respectable young fellow, am I correct?"

"I'd like to think so."

Dad nodded, beginning to smirk. "Look pal, I don't mind you being disrespectful to anyone else, as long as you are to my daughter. Okay?"

"Of course, of course, I…I adore your daughter."

"Hmm. With all your heart?"

"With everything I have."

I couldn't help but grin. Chase sounded quite passionate when he spoke about me, which I think surprised dad. He raised his eyebrows at Chase, before squinting his eyes and looking closely at him. He began to nod his head.

"Quite a charmer, you are, aren't ya?" Dad chuckled.

"Well, I…I don't know," Chase said.

"Let me tell ya something, you have to be a very special charmer to win the heart of my Shaylee."

I shot my head up at dad as I had been smiling at the floor.

"What's that supposed to mean, dad?" I asked, smirking at him.

"You know what I mean, honey," Dad winked at me. "You're very fussy, aren't you? Quite conscious. Takes a lot of impressing."

"I don't know what you mean," I laughed.

"And she's very lucky, I say," Dad said to Chase. "Tell me…a little bit about yourself."

"Uhh…well…" Chase stammered. "Well, uh…what sort of things do you want to know?"

"Anything you want. As long as I know you're, uh…a decent young boy."

"Well, uh…I live with my mom who's a hairdresser and I look after her a lot…"

"Ah yes, Shaylee's personal hair stylist," Dad interrupted. "Is she fond of my daughter, huh?"

"Oh yes, yes she is. She's always said to me since I was about thirteen that I should date her. We live quite happily…you know…I'm still at school at the moment…"

"You're final year, isn't it?" Dad asked.

"Yeah, I move onto senior year next year."

"Does school bother you?"

"Pretty much, yeah."

"You hate it?"

"Oh, yeah. The reputation is apparently good but it's really not. Everyone hates it, really."

"Hmm. Good lad, good lad. What would you do if the school was, uh…burnt down?"

"Probably have a party," Chase laughed. Dad suddenly laughed hysterically along with him.

I knew Chase thought dad was kidding, but I knew he wasn't.

"Well, Shaylee nearly made that happen, didn't she?" Dad chuckled.

Chase was lost for words then.

"Oh dad, if only the fire did grow bigger," I sighed.

"You don't mind the fact she did that, do you?" Dad asked Chase, suddenly having a serious edge to his voice.

"Not at all, J," Chase answered, almost enthusiastically. "I didn't blame her, to be honest, Kayley Lyons pushed her to it and she's a horrible girl so…"

"You're aware of her little problems, am I correct?"

"Dad…" I hissed under my breath.

"What problems?" Chase asked.

"The anger problems."

"She's told me about them, yeah, but that doesn't bother me at all."

"It doesn't, huh?"

"No."

"So…whatcha like most about my Shaylee, then, Chase?"

I could see Chase blush and he glanced down at the table in front of him. "Everything. She's beautiful, she's funny, she's honest and…" He smiled up at me. "She's so brave, too."

"Would you say…she's a girl who can hold her own?"

"Definitely."

"She gets that from me, y'know."

"Yeah," Chase chuckled. "She's told me that before as well."

"Oh and she knows she takes a lot after me." Dad smiled at me before turning back to Chase and staring him down with observant eyes. "Tell me, Chase. Are you prepared to look after her like a true man?"

"Absolutely."

"Hmm. And, uh…fight for her?"

"Yes."

"I mean, literally…fight."

"That's happened before now, Jack."

"Oh yes, I remember. Had a little fight with that bastard who tried to kiss her, didn't you?"

"Yeah."

"Did you win?"

"Oh of course I did, he's a little pussy anyway."

"Have you won a lot of fights, Chase?"

"A fair few. I only fight when I'm pushed to it, really. If I get really worked up."

"Bit like Shaylee, then, huh?" We all shared a giggle. "Seems like you're the sort of guy who takes no nonsense."

"I would say that."

"I like that. I don't want a weakling dating my daughter. Shaylee's a tough little mite, aren't ya, sweetheart?"

"If you say so, dad," I giggled.

"I know so," Dad said.

"I agree," Chase cut in. "Takes no nonsense from anyone."

"So, Chase, what you planning to do, y'know, in the future?" Dad asked.

"Well, I'm hoping to get a grade in art so I can study it in senior year…" Chase began.

"Ah yes, you and Shay with your artistic brilliance," Dad said. "In fact, isn't that how you became friends in the first place?"

"Yeah, it is actually. Strange."

"But anyway, you were saying…"

"Yeah, so I'm hoping to get that and if I get it my mom said I can move out of my home and get my own place."

"You never told me about this," I said.

"Me and mom were discussing it before I came here, actually," Chase explained. "She said I can move out and maybe live with my older cousin, Bradley, if I can't afford my own flat, when I move onto senior year and hopefully when I graduate at eighteen I'll have saved up to get my own place so I can move onto university to study art."

"Have I met Bradley before?" I asked.

"You probably saw him at my birthday party."

"Quite an intelligent young man, huh?"

"No I'm not really that clever, Mr. Napier, I'm just clever at art really…"

"No, I like that." Dad paused as he moved around a bit again. It was all going too well so far. Dad seemed to really like him and Chase seemed to take to dad, as well. Neither of them even mentioned the schizophrenia, which was a huge relief, because if we talked about it would surely make things a little awkward. "I must ask you to do one…small…thing," Dad said, pointing his finger up to the ceiling.

"Yes, anything," Chase answered.

"I wasn't sure what I was going to think of you, but I'm pleasantly surprised at your honesty and how genuine you are."

"Thank you…"

"Hang on, hang on, let me…finish…right, so…Shaylee has insisted to me that you're not a coward and not a little boy but you're actually a young man who can defend himself and her. I wouldn't be surprised if you would go to, uh…extreme lengths to protect her. Listen, that's all I'm asking you to do. Look after her, love her, and protect her and all that lovey stuff…but here's something else: keep her strong. Don't let her be weak either, because I didn't raise my daughter to be weak. Of course, if something crazy happens and she gets upset because of her, uh…problems, uh…then that's okay, you'll help her through that, won't you?"

"Of course I will."

"Good. Don't think she won't tell me anything foolish that you do, because she will inform me. Won't ya, honey?"

"Yes, dad," I said, obediently.

"You're a good lad. I think I can trust you with her. But I'm not saying be an all-round goodie-two-shoes. Some advice? Man to man? Studying and having these ambitions for art is all great, but…don't let it corrupt you. Distract you from Shaylee. Because as you know, I won't be around forever." My heart pounded. "So I need to know there's a good, strong man out there protecting my little girl. Like the son I never had…in a way. Always make sure you're there and when she's in need, you help her. I can't stand seeing her upset, but so would any father to a daughter, wouldn't they? If I hear anything about you breaking her, though, physically, but more importantly...emotionally…anything about you breaking her heart or just simply being a bastard…then I will kill you. And I don't mean that as a joke. I will. I'm not letting anyone break my Shaylee's heart. We all good?"

Chase gulped and nervously rubbed his hands together. "Y-Yes, of course," he spluttered. He then reached for my outstretched hand. "I won't let her down, let you down. I-I promise you. I love her too much, I-I could never hurt her…"

"You know how many young men say that and then break their promise because their minds guides them towards dangerous things?" Dad said, with a little smirk pursed on his lips. "You see, young boys like yourself…they can get a little distracted sometimes…"

"Oh I won't be…I…I promise you, Mr. Napier."

"J," Dad corrected.

"Sorry…J."

"Oh and uh…on a lighter note, if you two are gonna lose ya V's, you better do it safely."

Chase and I both burst into giggles.

"Oh, don't worry about that," Chase insisted.

"I wouldn't let him go near me without a condom on, dad," I said.

"Good. Good. But just to be safe, we better put you on birth control, huh, pumpkin?"

"I-I guess so…"

"Hey, it's a challenge enough to look after you, I don't want another one prancing around this flat…"

"Dad!" I laughed.

"Alright, I'll be quiet about it now," Dad sniggered. He looked up at the kitchen clock. "Goodness that went quickly. You better get a move on, huh, you two?"

Chase glanced at his watch and quickly stood to his feet.

"Yeah, we need to go, Shay, if we get our table for seven," he said.

Dad stood up and approached us both, hand in hand. He put his own hand forward to Chase, nodding at him to shake it. Chase confidently shook it.

"Nice to meet you, young man," Dad said, still shaking his hand.

"You too, Jack," Chase smiled.

"Now. You two have a good night. Look after my little girl now, won't you? Busy streets at night, these are, I should know."

"Why?" Chase asked.

I instantly got off the subject. "Uh, okay, daddy, I'll see you later."

"Come 'ere, you." Dad beckoned me into a hug, which I did and he lightly kissed my head. "What you planning to do afterwards, hmm?"

"We were gonna go back to Chase's," I replied.

"Let's come back here, Shaylee," Chase said.

I came out of dad's hug and stared at Chase. "Well, uh…okay then, if it's okay with you of course, dad?"

"Why not?" Dad said. "I won't bother you. But you'll have to go in your room, Shay." He gave us both a cheeky wink.

"Okay then, we'll do that," Chase beamed.

We took each other's hands again and I lead Chase out of the kitchen and into the hallway.

"Bye, daddy!" I called.

"Goodbye, my love!" he called back.

"Thank you!" Chase shouted.

"A pleasure, Chase. See you later, you crazy love birds!"

We did manage to get to Johnny's Italian restaurant on time for seven despite us rushing to get there. Chase had several cigarettes even on the way there, which concerned me a little, as I only had the one.

Words can't describe how beautiful the date was. The staff were amazing as was the service, and the restaurant itself was gorgeously decorated in lights, almost like it was Christmas. It was like entering a palace when Chase and I entered hand in hand. To make things fair, we shared a huge pepperoni pizza between us, which Chase knew was my favourite of all time. I don't think my smile faded once the entire time, I was still smiling when I went to the bathroom or we took a cigarette break outside. The pizza was like magic, perfectly cooked, as was the delicious sticky chocolate fudge cake which we had each as well. Chase never let go of my hand the whole night, and once again made me feel like I was the only girl on earth, whom he complimented repeatedly and talked about the weirdest things to.

I asked Chase about his cousin Bradley, and he explained that he was nearly nineteen and already had a job as a mechanic. Bradley had told Chase that if he wanted to move in with him he was welcome to, as he already had his own house. Chase's aunt (his mom's sister) and uncle were quite well-off and lived in the City, working as a secretary and a receptionist. No wonder Chase lived in possibly the nicest house in Gotham Town. Chase said he was considering living with him after he finished school that year, to "give his mom some space" and live with Bradley (whom he was quite close to despite being "chalk and cheese") throughout his senior years.

Just before Chase paid the bill, he revealed a little red box from his pocket, neatly tied with a little purple bow.

"I, uh…I thought I'd get you a little something," he said, shyly, handing me the box.

"Oh, baby…" I gasped. "Aw, you shouldn't have…"

"Now, now, don't start all that, come on, let me see your face when you open it."

I hurriedly untied the ribbon and opened the box, which revealed a sparkling necklace, which on the end hung a diamond-infested skull shape. The black rings for the eyes were outlined with even larger diamonds, and next to the necklace there were a pair of matching earrings.

I almost teared up at the sight of them. I put my hand to my chest and smiled gratefully at Chase, who was smiling as wide as I was.

"Do you like them, Shay?" he asked.

I sniffed. "They're beautiful," I squeaked.

"Aw, I knew you'd love them. What with you loving your skulls and bats and all that. I just had to get you them for your birthday."

I leaned over the table and we shared a little kiss.

"Thank you so much, honey," I said. "I love them! I mean, they're so awesome."

Chase then noticed the ring that was already on my finger, and gently took hold of my hand.

"What's this, Shay?" he asked.

"Oh this ring? Oh, this was my grandma's wedding ring. My dad's mom. He said that when she died that the rightful owner of this ring would be dad's daughter. And that's me."

"Oh, I see. It's very beautiful. It suits you."

"And if I ever had a daughter, I'd give to her, and so on."

Once the pill was paid, I headed into the bathroom and immediately put on my new accessories, putting the ones I already had on in my bag. As we stepped outside the restaurant to leave, Chase insisted we get a photo right there for memories, and we took one on his phone. As always, he looked ever dapper, but I looked a gothic mess. Of course, I didn't complain as Chase would start one of those cutie arguments that I couldn't be doing with, so I agreed for him to send it to me later.

We got the bus back home, and I immediately dragged Chase into my bedroom, shutting the door neatly behind me. I also rushed him to make sure in case he didn't see any of dad's weaponry carelessly left out around the flat. I knew there wasn't any of that in my room, anyway.

"Shaylee, what are you doing?" Chase chuckled as I pushed him into my bedroom.

"Remember what my dad said? We have to stay in here," I whispered. "And keep your voice down."

"Alright," Chase said, lowering his voice. "Aren't you gonna say hello to him or anything?"

"Ah, it'll be okay." I began to take off my shoes. "He'll have heard us come in. Trust me, sometimes it's best just to leave him be. If something gets too much, he can go a bit crazy." I threw my bag to one side before Chase hugged me around the back, kissing my cheek repeatedly. I squirmed happily in his arms. "Chase!" I giggled.

"What?" he laughed. "Aren't I allowed to give you a kiss?"

I turned around and he pulled me into a romantic embrace, making my body flutter with joy.

"Of course, but at least let me give you a proper one," I said, trying to sound seductive.

Chase chuckled, but I wasn't sure if he was laughing at my attempt or if it was just to be cute. Nevertheless, our lips touched and locked with each other. I felt Chase smile as we kissed for a good few minutes. When we finally came out of it, our heads leaned against each other and I stroked his bowtie, as he kissed my head, lightly.

"You had a good birthday, then?" Chase asked, quietly.

"It's been the best birthday ever," I breathed.

"Sounds like it," Chase said.

"Chase?"

"Yes, baby?"

"What did you think of my dad?"

I held my breath.

"He's…he seems like a good man," Chase stated, nodding his head.

I smirked, letting out a little laugh.

"You really think so? Really?"

"Hey, I can see how much he cares about you, which is great to see. He seemed very conscious of me, though."

"I told you he would be."

"I know, but that's understandable. He's only looking out for you, and every word I said to him was true, you know. I will look after you, he had nothing to worry about."

"You're lucky he likes you, Chase. You have to be someone pretty special for my dad to like you."

"Why is that?"

"I don't know, ever since mom died, you know…he seems to not like anyone. Apart from me." I lowered my voice and rested my head on Chase's chest. "To be honest, Chase, I…I think he's depressed."

"What's up with him?"

"Well…he seems a bit off with me sometimes. Some days he comes home and complains all the time. The, uh…you know…that stupid thing we both have in our minds, you know the thing I mean?"

"Schizophrenia?"

"Yeah, that…that doesn't help at all either."

"Oh my god, has he been to see a doctor at all?"

"He won't see one. Neither of us will."

"What? Why not?" Chase lifted my head up. "You can't be serious?"

"No, he won't."

"Why?"

"It…it's complicated, baby…I'd rather not go into details, it'll…it'll just upset me. I wouldn't try to convince him either because he may get angry with you. In fact don't even mention it. All he expects you to do is to look after and protect me, that's all he cares about. He wouldn't care if you straight up murdered someone tomorrow…he wouldn't care."

"You know I wouldn't do that, anyway."

"Who says you wouldn't?" I laughed. "You can be a little bit of a badass sometimes can't you?"

"I am a badass, Shay, and you know it."

I swooped my arms around his neck and a playful grin appeared on my lips.

"Alright then, Mr Delancey," I said in a silly posh voice. "Show me how really bad you are then. Take me…for you may never see my again in your life…and give everything I want in a bad man."

Chase burst out laughing as he pulled me closer until I was up against him. I thought he was going to tell me to cut it out, but to my pleasant surprise he actually joined in.

"Okay, Miss Napier," he said in an over-done low tone of voice, trying to sound like a gangster. It made me cough into giggles, as it didn't sound sexy in the slightest. "Come 'ere, then, and let me take you places you've never been before!"

Despite the giggles being uncontrollable, I continued.

"Oh, Delancey, please do, I'll do anything you'll ask!"

"Then you'll kiss me you fucking alien."

I laughed until my stomach burst, only to leap onto Chase so he was holding me above him. We made out for ages, until he spun me around in the air and flopped me onto my bed. My lipstick was smudged all over my face when he came off me, and chucked his shoes to the side. Like a starving wolf, he instantly came back on top of me again, kissing me hard until I could barely breathe. But I didn't mind. I was loving it. Oh how I loved this.

It was only when I opened my eyes after a long kiss did I realise he'd also thrown his coat off to the side and was only wearing his shirt and bowtie along with his jeans. I don't know what came over us both, we both became like pouncing lions. Without saying a word to each other, Chase undid he shirt and ripped off his bowtie and threw them away. It became out of control. I had a feeling rushing through me that I'd never felt before. This wasn't the butterflies, this was something different. But not bad different. It was amazing.

I sat up, and flipped my hair backwards. Chase, who was now topless, was now sat facing me. He looked right into my eyes, before he began stroking my face again. I bit my bottom lip and we kissed hard again. I suddenly had the urge to unzip the back of my dress, which I struggled to do, but Chase soon helped me, letting it slowly fall down. Until I was topless myself, I gripped the dress and held it close to my chest, as I realised I had no bra on.

"What's the matter?" Chase asked, touching my face again. He almost sounded out of breath.

"Chase, I…I have no bra on…" I whispered.

"Hey, it's fine, I don't either."

He winked at me as I laughed. Chase smiled at me as he touched the left sleeve of my dress and tried to lower it down. I quickly grabbed it again.

"No…no, no…" I whispered, harshly.

"Shaylee, what's up?" he asked, nudging a little closer.

"I…I hate my body, Chase…I still look like a twelve year old…"

"Don't be silly, it's only me, isn't it?" We looked at each other for a few moments. That feeling still hadn't died down. "You trust me, don't you?" Chase questioned.

"O-Of course I do…" I shakily replied.

"Trust me, okay?"

I gingerly allowed the dress to fall from my chest, revealing my less-than-impressive breasts. I glanced down in embarrassment, but nevertheless quickly stood up from the bed and let my dress fall to my feet, where I kicked it away. I was now just wearing my panties, and I consciously placed my hands over my breasts.

"Chase, I look, I look awful right now," I moaned.

"Load of nonsense, that is," Chase said, winking at me. "You're beautiful." He outstretched his hand which I slowly took and sat on the bed again. He leaned in, not taking his eyes off of mine as I lay down on my bed and he was above me. "You're so beautiful," he whispered again, kissing me lightly on my cheek.

"Chase, stop it," I giggled.

"No you are, you're so gorgeous," he said, seriously. "I'm so lucky right now."

I covered myself under the bedsheets, which Chase didn't seem to mind. We kissed some more until it got so passionate all of my makeup became smeared onto his face, which made us both crack up as he wiped it away.

I didn't really care what happened there and then, as I felt so happy. It set my mind racing, but not in the way it usually did, it spun it out of control with emotions that were unfamiliar to me.

We came out of the kiss and I looked down to see Chase was undoing his belt. That's when I tensely placed my hand on his hard chest to stop him.

"Chase, wait," I whispered.

"What's the matter, baby?" he asked, caressing my cheek with his other hand.

"Are you…you're not gonna…you know…"

"What?"

"You're not thinking about…you know…"

"What, Shay?"

"Chase…we can't…"

"Shaylee, if…if you don't want to, then that's okay, I…I won't force you to do anything…"

"Oh no, don't be stupid. I feel like I could eat you alive right now." We both chuckled quietly. "But, we…we can't…"

"Why not? Didn't your dad say he was fine with it?"

"He said about protection…we don't have…"

Chase laughed, making me jump slightly. "Oh baby, you didn't think I came prepared?"

My eyes widened. "What? What do you mean?"

He leaned in closer, smirking wide. "I have some in my bag."

"What?"

"Yeah!"

"Chase, you little bastard!" I laughed. "Why?"

"Well, I knew we were coming back to someone's house after the meal and I thought it might happen so I bought some yesterday…"

"Oh my god…"

"Shaylee, you're not mad, are you?"

"No! No…I'm not…" I sighed, as looked at him, lovingly. "God I love you."

"I love you too!" Chase laughed.

After we made out again for a few moments, you know, as you do, dad suddenly came peeping through the door, alarming us both. Thank goodness Chase had kept his trousers on at that moment.

"Dad!" I yelled, when I saw his face appear at my door. I covered myself again, quickly. "What you doing?" Like little boys, both dad and Chase started sniggering. "Chase!"

"Looks like you're getting lucky, eh, Chase?" Dad cried.

"Dad!" I cried.

"Yes, sir," Chase laughed.

"I'm sorry to interrupt your little party, sweetheart," Dad said to me. "But you're extremely loud." Chase started sniggering again, and I hid myself under the covers in humiliation. "So…" Dad continued, making us both listen, "so I'm going to put my earplugs in and turn up the TV real loud. So let yourselves go. Don't worry about a thing." I made a sarcastic expression at Chase. "Chase, my good lad…" Dad said.

"Yes, Jack?"

"I will have to stop this party if you do not have a condom…"

"He does, dad," I said. "In his bag."

"You promise me?"

"Yes! Yes, I swear!" I cried.

"Yes, I do," Chase insisted.

"Alright. Alright, I'll believe ya. Enjoy yourselves, you crazy lovebirds. Night, pumpkin."

Dad winked at me before closing the door behind him. Chase and I both erupted into laughter when we met eye to eye again.

Do I really need to go into details about what happened next? I think you can guess. The rush took over.

But just before anything too crazy happened, Chase whispered to me, "Are you alright, sweetheart?"

"Y-Yes…I'm fine…"

"I won't do it if you…"

"No, no…Chase, it's okay…." Chase raised an eyebrow up to his sweat-ridden head. Yeah, that shows how much he got into it, huh? "I'm just curious…" I admitted.

"Yes?"

"This…it won't…mess with my head, will it? It won't send my mind racing, do you think?"

Chase bit his lip, looking almost guilty.

"Well…how do you feel now?" he breathed.

"I feel fine."

"You don't feel anything?"

"N-No…not in my mind, it…it feels fine."

"Then it's okay, right?"

"But it might start if you…"

"Shaylee…darling…look at me…it's all gonna be fine, okay? Trust me."

I nodded.

"I love you," I whispered, as he kissed my head.

"I love you so much," Chase said before planting a kiss on my lips. "Now, come 'ere, Miss Napier…"

And…there you have it. I'm not going to explain what happens because you know what happens, right? But yeah, that's the night I lost my virginity.

Now I'm not going to describe how it felt because I don't need to. If you've done it, you'll remember your first time, right? You'll know how it feels, especially if it's with someone you love. A first love. It hurts a bit at first, but then you just get lost in the moment. That feeling that you're in the most precious moment of your life and never want it to fade.

It was all very quiet after it happened. Chase was sweating like a pig, but he looked extremely hot nevertheless. I still had my makeup on, but it ruined the waves in my hair. Chase cuddled me for a long time afterwards, and helped me change into my pyjamas. He stuffed his coat and tie into his bag but kept his shirt and trousers on.

Once we'd both settled down and Chase was ready to leave, he quickly pulled me into a hug. We couldn't keep our eyes off each other's.

"How you feeling?" he asked me, gently.

"Fucking great," I answered.

"Me too," Chase laughed.

"You know, baby, you should keep your chest out more often," I said, starting to unbutton his shirt.

Chase quickly grabbed my hand to stop me.

"Woah, woah, hang on, Shay," he chuckled. "Don't be starting that again, it…it was amazing but I'm tired as fuck now."

"I know," I laughed. "But I mean, just show your chest a little more." Chase allowed me to undo the first three buttons. "It's nice. You say I'm body-conscious?"

"Shaylee, it's freezing outside, I can't…"

I put my finger to his mouth, making him quiet immediately.

"You'd do it for me, right?" I asked, sweetly.

I removed my hand as Chase raised his eyebrows at me.

"Okay," he said. "If I promise to be more self-confident with myself, then you can, too."

"But Chase, that's different."

"How is it different, honey? You'd at least try for me, wouldn't you? You're a beautiful girl, and guess what? You're mine."

"Exactly, so I don't need to show off to anyone else, do I?"

"All I'm saying is, I know you're conscious, but we can both try and be more confident, for each other? Hmm?"

I smiled at him. "I guess you're right."

I didn't realise it was as late as it was until Chase said his goodbyes at ten minutes later. It was about 10:30pm when he left. He and dad had a little handshake again and dad murmured some comments to him before he left but I didn't quite hear. Probably something to do with some comments about protection again. We had a long kiss before he headed out, doing the usual 'I love you' and 'I'll text you tomorrow' conversation.

Before I went to sleep, I attempted to show dad my new accessories that Chase had got me for my birthday, but of course dad quickly moved onto another conversation about what had just occurred, asking an endless amount of questions about it, asking me if I felt like I'd 'achieved' something. I won't lie and say I was embarrassed talking about it with dad, because I wasn't. I did tell him everything, because I trusted him, and the entire time he of course made silly little comments about it. It's was nice to have a good laugh to end what had been a birthday that involved a whirlwind of crazy events. Crazy, but amazing. Dad still wouldn't shut up about the fact I was no longer a virgin when he put me to bed and the next morning.

It didn't take long for my friends to find out too, getting a message from Tom and Matty about it the next day, Chase obviously telling them he'd got laid. We all had a day together that weekend, and of course all of the guys were asking Chase about it. Tom even had the cheek to ask if I was good at it, which pissed Chelsea off. I thanked the Lord when Chase didn't answer that question. The only one who seemed quiet about it was Chris, who later told me that stuff like that should be kept strictly private, despite him going on about when he lost his virginity to some girl he dated for about three weeks. Yeah, some of my showers have lasted longer than some of the teenage relationships in Gotham (Tom and Chelsea managed to stay together, though, despite Chelsea always being pissed off about something he'd done).

That same weekend, I decided to have clean out of my room while dad was out doing whatever, putting all my presents away as I did. I was sorting out my drawers to fold my new clothes in there, when I suddenly discovered an old, creased up bit of paper crushed at the bottom. I opened it and gasped in happiness when I discovered it was my old drawings of The Adventures of Jane the Slave. I glanced at my bed, where my kiddie plastic tiara was laying there to be put away. I looked back at my drawing, then back at the tiara.

I couldn't help myself. As soon as I'd put everything away, I lay on my bed with my feet swinging in the air, and began to design. I drew a completely new Jane Price and Bob Moskins, purposely making them look like me and dad. I remembered what Chase had told me about being more confident with my body, and so I decided to make Jane more rebellious, more independent, and loving the fact she's adored by Moskins because she wears silly little skimpy clothes. I drew her clothes the scantier versions of my own, all purple and black and designing her makeup so she looked like the ultimate goddess of Goth. Of course, I added the tiara on her head, as I still kept the fact that Moskins likes to humiliate her and make her dress up like a five year old. I disowned Moskins's facial hair and drew him more like mix between dad and Chase, having Chase's grassy eyes and dad's droopy brown (natural) hair colour with a tinge of frizz in it.

I spent about three hours captivated on creating new stories for Jane. Now making her more of a fighting spirit rather than a wimpy little girl, I created stories where she started to abuse Moskins back, when he turned into a complete monster. I made it so that Jane chose to start taking drugs herself, rather than Moskins forcing her inject herself with those monstrous things. Of course, the abusive but also rather insane partnership between the two of them made them Jane start to develop the craziness in her mind. That way, she could relate more to the real me.

I drew some of these stories in the style of a comic strip, making their faces look like something in an anime and drawing their speech in bubble writing. I nearly ran of ink in my special pens drawing the colourful stories of Jane the Slave's life. Although, she wasn't really that much of a 'slave' anymore. She was more of a partner in crime, as I drew heaps of pictures of her bearing a gun at nothing in particular, but she was still sort of a little slave to Moskins, as he was a controlling asshole, but he wasn't psychotic. He still had feelings for her, but he found it hard to show them because of turbulent past of violence and abuse, so he really knows nothing more than that.

I sketched and sketched until my hand fell off my wrist. I'd doodled half a story before I finally got up and decided to make myself a drink. Still waiting on dad's return, I also made myself a ready-meal for dinner, and had two cigarettes while I waited for it. I shoved it down my throat as my mind was clogging up with so many new ideas for The Adventures of Jane the Slave. It felt like such an accomplishment I had created these stories and finally got back to drawing them again. I thought about the possibility of one day publishing them and making millions. Then me and dad would have all the money in the world and have no worries.

That's a big lie of course. We'd always have worries, whether we were millionaires or living in major poverty. We had a mental disorder that dad refused to seek help for. It was never going to be an easy life.

Oh how I wish I was ordinary sometimes.

I kept my little comic book creation to myself, and immediately stopped when dad came home that evening. We sat and watched a movie together that night, and the whole time he had a knife on the arm of the chair. A switch-blade knife, that's one I'd never seen before.

Weeks went by, and all seemed to carry on as normal. Dad went out, I went and spent time with Chase as well as helping dad provide for us both through crime and of course when I was alone I carried on making Jane the Slave until it got to the point I was obsessed with it.

It made me completely forget about Harley and the fact I wished she would leave my dad alone and just rot away in an asylum. It made me forget about all my troubles and struggles in the world. I didn't even break down or see red for so many weeks.

But of course, my luck can never last.

It came to the end of May on a Wednesday morning, and dad and I had just woken up from our gory dreams. Like any normal day, we were preparing to go out. I was carefully doing my makeup in front of mom's dressing table mirror, and I had flipped on the news while I was pampering myself. My new gun was lying casually on the dressing table in front of me, prepared for me to carry at any moment. As I finished off doing my eyeliner, dad strolled in, wearing his typical purple coat but with a black shirt underneath and his green-tinted hair effortlessly backcombed over his ears. He was typically clinging onto a knife in his right hand.

"All ready yet, Shay?" he asked, brightly.

"Almost. Just gotta to my hair," I replied.

Dad took as seat on the sofa as he waited for me.

Just as I was about to tie my hair up, something on the news drew my ears' attention. It made dad sit up and take notice too, which was rare. I whirled around to see.

"Gotham Police have confirmed that last night they were finally successful in arresting prisoner Harleen Quinzel, who escaped from Arkham Asylum this January. The middle-aged woman, who was sentenced to nine years imprisonment almost five years ago for the murder of Diana Jenson, was found late hours of last night, robbing expensive equipment from Gotham's Sports Centre in the City, and was later arrested by the cops. However, the other members who were at the scene of crime later escaped and the police are searching for the other unidentified gang members as we speak. When arrested, Quinzel claimed the police wrongly accused her and that Harleen Quinzel was not in fact her name. This, however, was later proved wrong when they checked her previous records, confirming that her identity was in fact Qunizel herself, whom the police have been searching for, for a matter of months. Quinzel stated in her interrogation that she is under a new alias, but refused to confirm it to the police."

"Idiot!" Dad yelled.

"The police have stated they will keep Gotham informed of Quinzel's gang members who were involved the robbery last night, and that all of the equipment can be returned safely."

"I told her…I told her not to go ahead with that!" Dad shouted, suddenly rising to his feet. "I said and I said they'd get caught after we did it first time, that's the first place they're going to look! But no, she's so mad that she went with it…and now she's been thrown away…"

I was completely amazed about how much dad was worrying.

"Dad!" I cried out.

"What?!" he shouted, startling me a bit.

"Dad, why do you care so much?" I asked. When he didn't answer I stormed over to the remote and zapped the television to turn off. I turned back to face down. For some reason, the frustration and anger almost started immediately. Dad frowned at me, but I didn't dare hold back. "Why do you care anyway?" I asked again.

"I just…do, okay, Shaylee?!" Dad snapped.

"There must a reason! I thought you didn't care about anyone, did you?"

"What's the matter with you, getting all snappy all of a sudden? Just don't talk about it."

I wasn't quite sure why, but all of a sudden I couldn't hold myself back anymore. My mind was already racing slowly, and it was telling me to suddenly lash out my opinions at dad. I knew I couldn't stand seeing dad angry or frustrated, I hated seeing him stressed, but right then, in the heat of the moment, I didn't care. I didn't want to hold back my views anymore. Maybe it was because I hadn't lashed out in a while, and I needed to let it go in burst of anger.

But this was the perfect opportunity to finally show dad what happens when I go mad, because he really still hadn't seen it for real.

"No, let me have my say!" I yelled at dad.

"Shaylee, we will talk no more about this," Dad retorted in his dangerous voice. It didn't scare me this time. "I'm getting her out, I'm calling the boys for help."

Dad started walking towards the door, but stopped in his tracks, backing up against the door and glaring at him with my eyes of gleaming anger.

"Oh no you're not!" I shouted.

"Shay, move out of my way," Dad said, trying to sound calm. I attempted to push me, but I stayed glued to the door. "Shaylee, move away! What's the matter with you?!"

"What's matter with me? What's the matter with you, dad?! Why are you obsessed by the fact you have to keep letting Harleen–"

"Harley!"

"Whatever the fuck her name is…why do you want to keep an insane little murderer who's the scum of the earth free?! Why, dad?! What makes her so special, huh?"

Dad was suddenly speechless, but that didn't mean he was silent. I could sense the anger inside of him. I glared at him, raising my eyebrows, still waiting for a genuine answer. I looked into his eyes, and I could almost see the red flames in them. My head started to reel louder, but I fought back not to scream or let them corrupt me. Dad should have been proud of me right then. I was not being broken. I was being strong.

Suddenly, dad violently grabbed my arm, which this time I couldn't fight back and he threw me to the ground, nearly knocking the small television over. I covered my face, but out of the corner of my eye I could still see dad hovering above me.

I finally managed to look up.

"Why won't you answer me?!" I cried. "You must have an answer, dad!"

Dad groaned loudly, sharply leaning down and grabbing my head to look at him. Still, I was not phased.

"Because I promised her that I'd help her," Dad hissed.

"Why? Why would you?"

"Let me finish! Because we'd always stuck together, and she wanted that. You should be grateful, she's helped me provide a lot for you over the last few months!"

"Grateful?" I scolded. "Grateful?" I couldn't hold myself back anymore. "Grateful for the fact she's taking advantage of you!"

"You shut up right now!"

"No! Let me speak for a change!"

"Go on then."

"Dad, do you think I'm stupid? You're not helping her because you want to…I've worked it all out…she's obsessed with you! You've always said she's been there to help you with your little crimes all of your life, and she's always stuck by you! You wanna know what I think? I think she's too deeply in love with you that's she'll always help you no matter what! I think her obsession with you and the fact you were engaged to and had a child with her best friend…it made her depressed and made her crazy. Because let's face it, dad…she escaped out of Arkham and immediately called you and you went back to her…and what happened the day you saw her again? I say what I think about her and you nearly hit me and send me into breakdown! You defend her because…I don't know…why do you? Why do you defend the woman who murdered the mother of your child?! The love of your life?! Mom will be turning in her grave!"

"You've suddenly got all defensive about your mother, haven't you, Shay? Huh?"

"Yes, because she was my mother! Remember what you said to me? No matter how much shit she put us through, I will still care about her because she was my mom! You say you cared but if you did you wouldn't keep running back to the woman who murdered her, now would you?! In fact, I wouldn't be surprised if you were sleeping with her, just to make her stay and help you!"

Dad suddenly pulled me up to my feet where he kept me in his strong grip. I struggled slightly, but there was no way I was backing down now.

"Shaylee, you dare you suggest such a thing!" Dad snarled.

"What's the matter, dad? Don't like the fact I'm saying my opinion? Telling you the truth?"

"You don't know the truth!"

"Maybe…but I know she killed my mother…and the fact that you…my father, the only family I have left, is what? Visiting her like she's your friend? Shouldn't you hate her? It's disgusting!"

"Disgusting, is it?"

"Yes! It is! Out of all the people I see you kill every day, I would get the most pleasure if I saw you kill her!" Dad suddenly paused as he frown faded. He loosened his grip, making me fall to my knees. I clung onto my head, and dad tried to touch my shoulders again. "No, don't touch me!" I yelled. I tapped my head and harshly whispered to it, "Calm down, calm down, calm down…"

Didn't you just say wanted her dead? I'm sure your dad wouldn't mind. He wants you to start using your gun, doesn't he? Show him you're not worthless…

"I'm not worthless!"

Harley deserves it. Isn't it what's right?

I felt a tear roll down my cheek as I looked up helplessly at dad, who had now began to start pacing up and down the room, mumbling and sighing to himself, probably trying to calm his voices.

"Dad?" I said, quietly. I snapped his head to me, with his hands on his head. "Dad, I know you probably hate me right now…but I'm only saying the truth." I paused as dad slumped on the sofa. "You are having sex with her, aren't you?"

"No," he mumbled.

"Dad…"

"I'm not…"

"Then why…dad…I just want to know why…" My voice started to tremble horribly. "Why would you disrespect mom like that? The woman you loved? You had your daughter with…me!" I started to sob, helplessly. "I've been wanting to ask you for so long…but I never have because I knew you'd do something like that to me, like what you just did."

"I don't know, Shaylee," he murmured. "I just don't know."

"What do you mean you don't know?!"

"Shaylee, I…"

"Tell me the truth! Can't you tell the truth?!"

"Don't you get like that with me…"

"What do you expect me to say?! You've told me all my life to defend myself, be independent and fight for what's right. That's what I'm doing now, isn't it? You even encourage me to kill people who aren't worth my time. Well, you know what, dad?" I stood to my feet, and I furiously wiped my tears. Dad curiously looked at me, almost intrigued at my words. I listened closely to the voices swirling in my head. "Harley isn't worth my time. You've wanted people out my life who are going to weaken me, so I'm going to follow in your footsteps. You want me to get used to my new gun? Let's do it, dad. Yeah. Let's do it." I paused, taking deep breaths. "I want her dead, dad. I want her dead. I can't let the woman who killed my mother, for a reason I am still unaware of, the woman who is taking advantage of my only family…I can't let her walk the earth. I don't want you hurt. She's insane, but I'm not. I know what I'm doing. She may do the same to you, so why not get rid of her before it happens?" Dad still remained quiet, giving me an expressionless face. "You understand m, dad?" I asked. "I thought you would understand what I'm doing here."

Dad finally rose to his feet and walked up to me, not taking his eyes off me. The angry presence didn't seem to my steaming off him now, which made myself calm, although the monster inside of me was still controlling me. The words I said to dad, that wasn't me. That was the monster. I wasn't sure what it was yet, but it almost became interesting to me.

Dad finally managed to speak. "You wanna put that gun to use, do you?" he questioned, still blank.

"Yes," I answered.

"Is your head okay?"

"Of course it isn't, but why should I complain? I don't want it to take over right now when I'm focusing on something much more important."

Dad's eyebrows lifted in almost astonishment.

"Good girl," he praised. "You know somethin'? I was totally angry at you at first, but now you're starting to make sense…"

"You're only just seeing sense now?!"

"Shhh…calm yourself, my love. I don't know what's come over you in the last few minutes, but you know what I see? A determined young woman who's wanting to go to ah…extreme lengths to get what she wants. You know myself and Harley have always been very close, and I'm not gonna reveal anything because I'm a man of my promises...but who's my main priority, Diana?"

"Diana? I'm Shaylee."

"Sorry. Shaylee. God, you're looking too much like her…"

"I'm your priority, dad, aren't I?"

"Absolutely. And so, why should I have all the fun? I have to give you your fair share. So here's what's going to happen. I'm gonna call some of my friends, and we'll meet them at Arkham to try and get Harley out…"

"What?"

"Ah-ah-ah…let me finish…and we'll just see how determined you really are. You can join us this time, huh? Personally, I don't think you'll have the guts to straight up shoot Harley…"

"Oh, dad. Trust me. I will."

"Hmm…but we'll see, won't we?"

"What if I did do it, dad? Then what you say? Would you be mad that I shot her or would you be happy?"

"I'm not sure. I'm not sure how I'll feel. But if you did do it, with fire in your heart, I'm sure I would have a sense of pride for you, my little one."

"Dad, I'm not doing it for you. I'm doing this for mom. But I still don't understand how you can't hate her with every fibre inside of you…I just don't understand, dad."

"Sometimes, honey…I don't understand myself. Now, baby…get your gun. We have a date at Arkham. Oh and if you're caught holding her at gunpoint, that's not my responsibility. You're the one who wants to kill her. I won't help you. Let's think of this as your test, Shaylee."

Dad started heading towards the door, grabbing his cell phone from the side as he went.

"And what if I fail, dad?" I asked, even though I knew I wasn't going to.

"Then, we'll just have to do you another one, won't we? We'll have to see you get rid of idiots at some point. Which I will organise."

"You won't need to, dad, because I'm going to kill her. I will. They're telling me to. I want to. I just want to see her die. Just like she saw mom die."

Dad left the room while I stared ahead at the wall, with murder in my mind for the very first time.

I felt like a monster.