(A/N: Sorry updates took so long, I lost motivation and then when I had it things suddenly got crazy :P also, there isn't really any action in this chapter, just some Ritsu thoughts lol)

I frowned when Masamune quickly fled my kitchen, my front door soon opening and shutting loudly to notify me that I was left alone and it certainly left a familiar and unwelcomed sting in my chest.

Had I come off too strong? Maybe I came off too strong. I finally got him in my apartment for the first time and I asked him to tell me how he feels about me after being separated for ten painful, jading, desolate years. Okay, I probably came off too strong. But after having all that time pass and then finally having the object of my affections so close...it's a little hard not to try to push things along.

Masamune didn't seem like he had changed that much, after all, so I admit that I thought this would be easy. However, it was still hard to gauge what he was thinking or feeling because of his impenetrable mask of steel. He also still liked to tease the hell out of me, as much as I hated it. But...he had still been much kinder to me back in high school, even through the small things he did. It hadn't been hard for me to see that he loved me. Now he was so cold. I couldn't even get a little smirk out of him if I tried and I'd be lying if I said that wasn't discouraging.

I started to put away the left overs and clean up the table with a sigh, Masamune's comment about my 'pampered prince' lifestyle still irritating me. Mostly because if it wasn't for Yokozawa I'd probably be useless when it came to taking care of myself and Masamune would be right. I wondered briefly if Yokozawa would want any curry because I probably wouldn't eat the rest of it, but then quickly recalled that anytime I brought food up to him it turned into a lecture about my health and nutrition. I really hated it when he turned motherly on me. I'm an adult after all! I can take care of myself! So what if I collapsed maybe once or twice...

I finished cleaning up, my jumbled and mixed up thoughts getting back to my next door neighbor. Neighbor. All that separated us was a wall and yet somehow that made it even more unbearable. Loneliness had it's bony arms around my waist and was squeezing pretty tightly.

I couldn't help but to wonder what he had done in England. Who did he meet? What did he like to do on the weekends? Did he see any sights?

Did he date anyone?

My fists clenched a bit at the mere thought before I scolded myself. It was stupid to get jealous over something like that! Embarrassing too! I was a grown man who shouldn't have such petty feelings over any past flings Masamune may have had. I mean, even I saw other people, even if only for one night...

Did he miss me?

I could feel my face burn with shame for wanting that to be true and glee for the mere possibility of that being true. Though, with the way things were going now, I'd say it was more likely that he resented me than missed me during our time apart.

It was strange to think about Masamune being just as confused and heartbroken as I was. Back in high school he always seemed so level headed and calm and put together and in control and honestly just everything I wasn't. I couldn't imagine him hurting just as much as I did. I couldn't picture nightmares of my face plaguing him. I couldn't see him in such a pathetically desperate state to feel some sort of affection that he stupidly looked for it in bars and alcohol.

But, then again, maybe he wasn't as strong as he always looked to be.

And with that I concluded that this was definitely not going to be easy, but I had waited ten years. I could wait longer.