Chapter Twelve
Kili waited to tell Fili what had happened until everyone had gathered together the next day around Fili's bed, where he had been ordered to stay by the healers. As he expected, Fili was resistant to the idea of turning back now.
"I don't trust her," Fili stated as soon as he was finished, tightening his grip on Kili's hand. "How do we know that she is not simply trying to ensure you remain cursed? Her power to speak inside your head means no one could protect you against her orders."
Gandalf glowered at him. "The Lady of Lorien would not be so dishonorable as to lie so I would ask you, your highness, to not disrespect her again."
"But you disagree with her," Kili pointed out. "You believe Saruman can be reasoned with."
"Lady Galadriel has always been distrustful of Saruman," he explained with a thoughtful look. "I have never received a complete explanation as to why. I always assumed it stemmed from whatever occurred between them before I came to Middle Earth. However, though Saruman can be prideful, he is not uncaring or unwise."
"I bet he counts himself as wise and caring too," Nori commented shrewdly.
"Aye," Bofur agreed. "Probably thinks all he does is done with wisdom and care."
"That does not mean he cannot see reason," Gandalf argued. "I still believe you should still go to him. Kili and Ori both will only suffer more if you don't."
"It's another month's journey to Isengard," Kili reasoned. "Counting the return journey, that's two more months' worth of unknown peril. If we know that Saruman will not help, why risk it?"
"I agree," Dwalin said. "The princes have already been in too much danger on this cursed quest. And now with orcs havin' recognized Fili, I'd prefer we get back to the mountain sooner than later."
"This decision should not be made out fear for me," Fili protested, eyes flashing to Kili, who had the decency to look guilty. "I am perfectly capable of defending myself, and I won't let any harm come to Kili either, from this journey or from remaining bespelled longer than necessary. And what of Ori? Kili might have a hope if the lady is correct, but not Ori."
"If the wizard won't take back Prince Kili's curse, he won't help Ori either," Dori said mournfully.
"Are we sure Saruman won't help though?" Bifur asked. "Gandalf has helped us this far. His advice can't be discounted."
"Ori's curse can be broken, though, right?" Kili said, looking at Gandalf in askance. "You said some curses could be."
"Well, yes, but only through great tragedy," the wizard replied ruefully.
"Great tragedy?" Ori said, speaking up for the first time. Kili glanced at him for the first time since they had gathered. He felt guilty even looking at the other cursed dwarf knowing that, by arguing to give up their quest to see the White Wizard, he was condemning Ori to a lifetime of being cursed.
He just couldn't risk Fili for the other dwarf, though, not when there was such a small chance of success. If that made him a terrible person, so be it.
"Most spells of this nature can be broken only by an extremely strong force in opposition to it," he explained. "In your case, Ori, it would be a sorrow so great that no compulsion could make you happy."
The entire company sobered at that, each one considering exactly how great a tragedy would need to be to cause such sorrow. Kili was sure that none of them wished that on Ori, not even if it would break his curse.
"The orcs we escaped from will be lying in wait for us to exit these woods again," Fili pointed out. "If the whole point of cutting our journey short is to avoid further peril, running straight back to them doesn't seem the way to do it."
Kili hadn't thought of that.
Gandalf smiled at Fili. "Prince Fili makes a good point. The orcs believe there is little friendship between dwarrows and elves, so would not expect you to seek shelter with them long. They will be waiting for you to come back the way you came. Even if you were to avoid crossing the river, they would follow you from the opposite bank."
"Or they might think we continued on through the woods and will be waitin' for us when we come out the other side," Dwalin countered.
"It would take at least a week for an orc party to go around the wood," Fili replied. "If we leave soon, we can be gone before they even think to circle around."
"Can you even walk on that leg, laddie?" Dwalin growled in exasperation.
"It's only a flesh wound," he scoffed. Kili didn't believe that for a second, not when he had seen Fili's wince as he sat up in the bed to speak with everyone.
"If it's a matter of orcs waiting for us on our way out, we could always just wait here a while longer," Dori suggested. "No need to go all the way to Isengard to escape a pack of orcs."
"I am continuing to Isengard," Fili declared, eyes flashing defiantly. "I will go alone to plead Kili's case to the White Wizard if necessary."
"Well I am going back to Erebor," Kili challenged stubbornly. "And I will travel alone if no one else joins me."
The rest of the company shifted nervously as the two of them glared at each other.
Bofur cleared his throat nervously. "Well, I think we'll all just be going and let the two of you sort out where we go next."
"No, Kili's right, it's safer to turn back," Fili said. "Which is why you'll all be escorting him back to Erebor."
Kili grit his teeth. He wasn't sure if Fili was serious or if he was trying to call his bluff, but he wasn't going to give up without a fight. "If we're going to split up, I think Gandalf, Dwalin, Nori, Dori, and Ori should go with you," he said with a considering look. "Bofur and Bifur will be enough to see me back to Erebor safely."
Fili narrowed his eyes. "Dwalin goes with you," he countered.
"All due respect, your highnesses," the guardsman said sarcastically, rolling his eyes. "But we all know that neither of ya is going anywhere with that other. Now we're all gonna give ya some privacy to fight this out, then ya can tell us where we're gonna go."
"It's not just our decision!" Kili protested uselessly as they began shuffling out. "What about Ori?"
Nori shook his head at that. "You let me and Dori worry about Ori. We've taken care of him this far. You're our princes. We follow where you go."
Kili looked down guiltily as they all left them. It was a lot harder to be selfish and put Fili's safety over lifting Ori's curse when the entire company would follow him and Fili in whatever they decided.
He sighed and gave Fili a pained look. "I hate being apart from you. Don't send me back to Erebor without you," he begged.
"You don't have to worry about that. Dwalin's right," Fili admitted softly, reaching out to cup his face and press their foreheads together. "I won't be parted from you again."
"I just don't want you to get hurt again," he confessed. "Not again. Not when the only reason you're not safe inside the mountain is me."
"You weren't safe inside the mountain," he argued. "You're still not safe inside the mountain. Not entirely, even if someone trustworthy were with you at all times."
"Lady Galadriel says that the curse will eventually be lifted," Kili pointed out. "I'd be safe then."
"And how long would this mysterious savior take to lift it, even if the elf can be trusted at all?" Fili asked. "She said herself it could be decades! You could be made to do who knows what in the meantime! I've told you I won't take you back to the mountain cursed and I mean it. And who's to say this all-powerful being will find us if we're not in Erebor? You could be cursed forever then!"
"You think I'd care if I lost you?" Kili said in choked voice, closing his eyes against the tears threatening to fall. "Fili… I can't… You're my everything too, you know. Literally. Fili, what am I without you? You're all I have."
"That is not true," he growled vehemently, causing Kili to open his eye to look at him. "If anything were to happen to me, you'd still have my parents. And you'd have the rest of the company. But that doesn't matter because you're not going to lose me. But I can't lose you either, Kili. I have to make it so you're safe. The only way to do that is to get your curse removed."
"At the expense of your own safety?"
"I am safer than you," Fili argued, looking distressed. "You think the orcs have not figured out who you are as well? They've seen the braids in your hair. If they are smart enough to know my identity, they're smart enough to know yours. And they'll know you're cursed! What if one is able to figure out how?"
"You'll just have to stay at my side and order me to not listen to them then," Kili assured, sliding carefully onto the bed to lie next to him and tucking his head under Fili's chin. He signed in resignation as he interlocked his hand with Fili's. "We have to keep going, don't we? Even if it weren't for me, for Ori? We have to at least try the wizard."
"We'll be careful," Fili promised. "I'll be careful. Please don't worry about me."
Kili snorted. "I'll stop worrying about you as soon as you stop worrying about me."
Fili laughed. "Fair enough."
They stayed in Lorien for three days to give Fili's leg time to heal. Kili had wanted to stay longer, knowing that, though the wound wasn't serious, it still bothered Fili and made walking painful. Fili, however, had insisted that it was fine, and the elven healers had apparently cleared him to travel, though Kili wasn't sure how much of that was them just wanting the dwarrows gone from their wood.
Kili was grateful, though, to be leaving the golden wood. He supposed it was peaceful in a way, but he could almost feel the magic in the air. It didn't sit well with him, and he was constantly dreading hearing Galadriel's voice in his head again. While she hadn't seemed to bear him ill will, he still hadn't forgotten how she had controlled him. He was leery of her trying it again.
So it was a relief to put the wood behind him them at dawn four days after they had first entered Lothlorien.
"I think you made the right choice," Gandalf said comfortingly as he fell into step next to the two princes where they walked in the middle of the company. Kili rolled his eyes. The wizard got his way. Of course he approved of their decision. "And I wouldn't worry too much about orcs on this leg of our journey," he continued, either not noticing Kili's reaction or just ignoring. "We'll spend most of it skirting the edges of Fangorn Forest. Orcs fear to go near it."
Fili and Kili shared nervous looks.
"Should we fear to go near it?" Fili asked what they were both thinking.
"Only if you plan on making the trees angry," Gandalf replied dismissively before lengthening his stride to get to the front of the company to lead them.
"How do you make trees angry?" Kili said in a panicked voice, looking to his betrothed with wide eyes. "How do you keep from making the trees angry?"
"I'm not sure," he answered, face twisting in confusion. "But I think it is a good thing that none of us favors the axe."
"I've heard tales of Fangorn," Nori spoke up from behind. "They say you go in and you don't come out. Man, elf, dwarf. The forest takes them all." Fili and Kili drew closer to each almost subconsciously. "They say the trees are alive."
"All trees are alive," Fili scoffed, shaking his head. "That's why they grow."
"Aye," Bofur chimed in with a grin. "But all trees don't pick up their roots and move whenever they want. All trees can't wrap their branches around a dwarf and crush him to death."
Kili shuddered at that before glaring at them both. "Then I guess we'll just have to make sure we don't make them angry enough to crush us to death, then, won't we?"
"Of course, your highness, but you never know how fickle trees can be," Nori stated, brushing past them with a smirk.
Kili scowled at his back before frowning. "How do you fight trees?" he asked Fili.
"I don't think you do," he answered with a shrug. "Let's hope it doesn't come to that."
Tbc…
A/N: So I met my goal in my outline today so I let myself write! Hope you enjoyed it!