Shepard sat on the couch in his personal cabin, reminiscing about his conversation with Tali earlier that morning. He smiled as he replayed the memories again and again in his head. Shepard remembered how cute Tali's nervous reaction was when she accidentally let it slip that he was the only person she had ever trusted enough to link suits with. How attractive he found her flirtatious voice. How Tali's eyes lit up like fireworks when he told her that the romantic feelings she had were mutual. Shepard hadn't felt the rush of emotions that came from the beginning of a relationship in quite sometime. It'd been almost six years since Shepard had last been in a relationship with a woman, his encounter with Liara two years earlier had been the result of purely physical attraction. Even though he had dated before, Shepard's feelings for Tali were different than they were for the other women. His passion burned more intensely, his longing for her presence was almost unbearable, his joy when she with him was more powerful. Shepard could tell that the connection he had with Tali was special, and he wasn't surprised he felt this way at all. Tali was a kind, strong, loyal, and trustworthy woman. He had fallen for her without even knowing what she looked like, her effect on him was that immense. Shepard checked the time on his omnitool, and saw that it was 17:03.
Great, her shift just ended a few minutes ago. She'll be up any minute.
He had grabbed dinner for the two of them; a turkey sandwich for him and a tube of nutrient paste that Mess Sergeant Gardner had assured him was Tali's favorite flavor. He couldn't wait to talk to her, and discuss their newfound relationship.
Tali, however, wasn't as optimistic as Shepard. Her feelings for him hadn't changed at all, every word she said to him that morning was the truth. It was Shepard's feelings for her that was causing her to worry. Tali's old nemesis, her own self-doubt, had reared its ugly head again.
Shepard doesn't really feel that way about you. You forced him into a situation where he couldn't turn you down, he's too nice of a guy to hurt you like that.
Tali had fought with those doubts throughout her entire shift.
No! Shepard does have feelings for me! The way he defended me at my trial proves it. No one else would've done that for me, he did because he cares about me so much.
It seemed like no matter what she thought, her doubt would always have another argument.
You're a quarian, trapped inside your suit. Why would Shepard want someone he can't even kiss without worrying if his germs will kill you? He deserves someone better than you.
Tali's hands were already wringing during the elevator ride up to his cabin. When she reached Deck One, she hesitated before entering Shepard's cabin. Tali was scared of what he might say if her doubts were right. She didn't know if she could handle the rejection after getting her hopes up so high. With all the courage she could muster, she walked into Shepard's cabin, preparing for the worst.
When Shepard saw the door open, he immediately sprang off the couch and headed towards Tali.
"Hey you." he flirted as he hugged her.
"Hey... Shepard." Tali said nervously, hugging back lightly.
Shepard picked up on her tone right away, "Tali, what's wrong?"
"I was thinking about what we said this morning. I'm sorry, when I expressed my feelings for you, I forced you into a situation where you felt obligated to say you felt the same. I don't blame you for not wanting a quarian woman." she said, unable to look Shepard in the eyes.
She looked down at the ground in shame, and tears began to well in her eyes. Shepard took one of her hands in his, and with the other gently pushed up on her chin until her eyes met his.
"Tali, you didn't force me into anything." he said truthfully. "Believe me, I don't want anyone else. I only want you, I want you so much."
"You really mean that?" Tali allowed herself a sliver of hope.
Shepard put as much love into his words as possible, "Of course. When I look at you, I don't see a quarian. I see a woman who I care so deeply for."
With those words, Shepard struck down the self-doubt that had held Tali back for so long. She finally believed that she had worth to people outside her race, that he really did care for her. Tali embraced him tightly, Shepard had finally freed her from her chains.
"Thank you, Shepard." she said softly. "You don't know what it means to hear you say that, thank you."
"You're welcome, Tali. Every word I said was the truth, don't you ever forget that." Shepard replied, relieved that she finally believed him.
"I won't." Tali promised.
With their feelings for each other confirmed, they moved to the couch and ate their first dinner together as a couple. They talked about when they had developed feelings for each other, and all the obstacles that had prevented them from telling each other. Shepard was saddened when Tali told him just how deeply his death had affected her, but was just glad to finally be with her. After dinner, they decided to watch a movie together, and snuggled on the couch. Tali was so incredibly happy, what she had wanted for so long had finally come true. She hadn't been this happy in a long time, and she had Shepard to thank for that.
Shepard chuckled slightly at a thought.
Tali noticed it, and joked, "That part wasn't even that funny."
"No, it wasn't the movie specifically." Shepard explained. "It's just… I haven't watched a movie with a girlfriend in almost six years. I was thinking about how rusty I must be with all this."
"Girl friend?" Tali asked, confused. "Isn't that just a friend who's a girl? Do humans not have a term for this stage of a relationship?"
Shepard laughed softly, "Girlfriend, it's only one word. It's a term for a woman who is specifically interested in one person, and is in an exclusive relationship with that person. Humans would consider you my girlfriend, and would call me your boyfriend."
Tali giggled after hearing him described their new relationship, the feeling was still fresh for her.
"I understand now, boyfriend." she said playfully. "Girlfriend is like inszel."
"Inscell?" now it was Shepard's turn to be confused. "My translator didn't quite get that"
Now it was Tali's turn to explain, "Inszel. The best translation I can come up with is 'most trusted confidant and partner'. It's a term of endearment used for quarians, and now a human too, who are in hecs'tiyl."
"Sorry Tali, you lost me on that last word." Shepard was now even more confused.
Tali took a moment to think of how to explain it to a non-quarian.
"Hecs'tiyl roughly means 'pathway to the heart'. It's the second of three stages of the quarian bonding process. The first is pemla'tiyl, 'pathway to the mind'. In that stage, quarians become very close friends. I went through that stage on the original Normandy, during our talks in the drive core room. Now that we expressed romantic interest in each other, I've crossed the threshold into hecs'tiyl. In this stage, quarians become exclusive, just like a boyfriend and girlfriend."
It was a lot to take in, but Shepard thought he understood it pretty well.
"Ok, inszel, what's the third stage?" he asked.
Tali loved hearing him speak to her in her native language, especially using that term.
She said playfully, tapping him on the chest with her finger, "I'll let you know if, when, I cross that threshold."
"What if I get there first?" Shepard asked.
Tali sighed, "Well… Shepard… I don't know if you can actually go through the bonding process. Quarians are a very emotional race, and no offense, but I don't know if you have the emotional depth that we do. The bonding is so much more than just a relationship, it's a change of your very being. Two souls become one."
"Well, now that you explained it, I'm pretty I sure went through pemla'tiyl on the SR-1 too." Shepard retorted. "I always knew there was something special about you Tali, who's to say I wasn't actually experiencing pemla'tiyl?"
"I don't know, Shepard. It's a lot for me to think about, and only time will tell." she lifted her head off his chest and tapped the top of her visor to his forehead. Tali continued lovingly, "For now, inszel, be content knowing my heart is yours."
"Why'd you just tap your visor to my forehead?" Shepard asked.
He wasn't complaining, just curious.
"It's how quarians kiss." Tali explained. "Since we can't remove our visors to actually kiss with our lips without jeopardizing our health, we kiss with our visors".
"Oh, well in that case…" Shepard tapped his forehead to the top of her visor, "I can get used to that."
Tali blushed and giggled, and they both finished watching the movie.
When it was over, the time was 21:22. Shepard could tell Tali was getting tired, and he was as well.
"Tali, would you like to sleep in here tonight… with me?" Shepard suddenly realized how that might sound to her. "Not sleep with me as in… that… I meant just in the same bed, sleep next…"
Tali put a finger on his mouth to hush him, "Shepard, I knew what you meant. And yes, I would love to."
Tali got into bed first, and Shepard went into the bathroom to change into a plain white t-shirt and lounge pants. He then joined her in his bed, and pull the sheets over both of them. Tali laid on her side, as she always did, right next to Shepard. She had one arm under his back and one on his chest, her hands meeting on his shoulder. Shepard laid on his back, his left arm under Tali with his hand on her waist, his right arm gently resting on hers on his chest. Tali used his chest as a pillow, relaxed by the gentle up and down movement from his breaths. Shepard had begun to drift off when he was pulled back by Tali's voice.
"Shepard?" she asked. "Why haven't you told me your first name?"
His eyes shot open.
Oh my God, he thought, Tali's my girlfriend and I haven't told her my first name. "Tali, I'm so sorry." he apologized. "My first name is Jonathan, but I've always gone by John."
"No need to apologize, everyone on the Normandy just calls you Shepard." Tali replied. "Hmm, John… I like it."
"I think you might be the only person on the Normandy who knows my first name." Shepard theorized. "And I'm glad you approve, Tali."
"If I am the only one, then it'll be my secret. Only to be used in private." Tali said flirtatiously. "Goodnight, John."
Shepard smiled, "Goodnight, inszel."
Author's Note: The sleeping position of both Shepard and Tali I described is the same one used in Mass Effect 2 when you invite Tali up to you cabin and lay down together on the bed.