LOVE ISN'T FAIR

Raoul awoke as the morning Sun lit up his room. Riki and Iason were still sleeping soundly like a loving cuddle. He went into the bathroom to prepare for a new day, but something stung the sole of his foot and he let out a muttered curse.

"Damn!" Raoul sat down on the toilet and lifted his foot. Drops of blood were seeping out of a fine wound caused by a tiny shard of glass that remained hidden in the crevice between the tiles. It had found its way to remind Raoul of the tragedy that had taken place a few days ago. The blood was dripping from his foot and patted against the polished silvery surface and the Master's thoughts drifted to Naoki. The Pet's red hair was as stunning as the tiny droplets of life on the glossy floor, but at the same time his face was devoid of color just like the grey shimmer of the tiles. It reminded Raoul of Naoki's pain and the first subject on his daily agenda was to visit the Pet who was still being hospitalized pending a mental evaluation. Raoul left him in the care of healers in case Naoki wanted to talk to someone – anyone – as long as he opened up.

Raoul dressed formally for he was to leave for the office after visiting Naoki. Iason and Riki met him at the entrance, as Raoul was about to leave the mansion.

"Should I go with you?" Iason asked holding his adored Pet close to his body as they returned from a relaxing meditation in the garden.

Smiling at the recalcitrant pair, Raoul shook his head. "I am going to pay Naoki a visit before I go to the office," Raoul explained. "If you want I can have the chauffeur pick you up after he has dropped me off. He will call you when he is approaching."

Iason nodded and asked Riki to wait for him in the kitchen for a shared breakfast. He would accompany Raoul to the car.

"Tell me something, Raoul," Iason began softly as they moved towards the limousine. "You are obsessed with this Pet, aren't you? I can recognize the pattern, if you know what I mean. Would it help to tell you to avoid making the same mistake that I made?"

Raoul turned and leaned against the door of the car. "No, it wouldn't."

Iason nodded and continued. "You judged me for being head over heels in love with a mongrel and do you remember what I said to you?"

Raoul tilted his head without responding and thus Iason continued. "Do you remember what I told you about obsessive love?"

"I do," Raoul replied and placed a hand on Iason's shoulder in a reconciling gesture. He remembered those words vividly, but Raoul had not been receptive to understand the meaning of them then; 'to sacrifice everything even if the world shatters around him'. It was during a time when Raoul's confidence in his superiority was beyond his self-awareness – just as Iason had been before he met Riki. It was also during a time when Raoul sold, traded and handed out slaves, Pets and even members of opposition groups to people of power without caring about their fates once they were apprehended. He could arrange complete annihilation of opponents and killing off of assassins, just as he had done when Iason had been in the line of fire. Raoul was an Elite of the Elites and everyone below his class was of no importance and thus it was far too strange for him to understand the radical change within Iason as Riki stepped into his life.

Raoul had watched Riki drag the prominent Blondie of Tanagura into something lower than his lofty station, and at that time Raoul had thought himself immune to the flaws Iason seemed to possess. He was resistant to the worldliness of the common class and even some Elites, and it was when Iason warned, or perhaps through a wild guess even foresaw that "One day, you will get to taste the consuming pain of obsessive love…one that never leaves your thoughts and always reminds you of a constant hunger."

Iason had been so right Raoul thought as the car left the mansion.

Raoul had spoken to the psychiatrist attending Naoki. The therapy sessions were expensive with the well recommended professional who agreed upon attending Naoki for a modest fee – which meant that he was rather expensive. His patients were seldom Pets and to lower himself to caring for one had its price. However, to Raoul the sum of money was only a trivial matter. The psychiatrist complained about the troublesome patient who was reluctant to speak with him.

"I've spent days trying to get something out of him," he muttered. "This Pet is damaged goods. He is far too old, too fragile and too lost in his own confusion." The white hair swayed on his back as he turned and the haughty expression hit Raoul's face. "It is best to give him up," the psychiatrist explained. "No one would want him anyway, but he is very strong and muscular for a Pet and I am sure he could be of great help at construction sites or…"

"That is for me to decide, doctor," Raoul cut him off. "I will decide the fate of my own Pet!"

The professional raised an eyebrow in an arrogant display, but Raoul had neither the time nor the energy to waste on such a petty figure.

"Of course," the psychiatrist added and bowed with respect, although it was mostly a question of a trained response rather than genuine reverence. Raoul cared nothing for it and ordered the psychiatrist to remain outside, whilst he visit his lost Pet.

Raoul entered Naoki's room and was taken into view by the boy where he sat near the window with his back to the door. Naoki immediately perceived and recognized the Master's presence but did not even turn as he spoke to his Master.

"I am not crazy," his first words floated through the room. "I don't need a psychiatrist. I knew what I was doing…I wasn't temporarily insane. Those who think that are idiots themselves."

Naoki's petulance slipped off his lips, but he wasn't regretful. His world had collapsed and he felt that falling a bit further down wouldn't make a big difference.

"I know," Raoul offered in return. "But I was hoping that by talking to someone you'd feel better."

Naoki snorted, but continued to stare blankly out of the window.

"Talking to someone," he repeated rhetorically and shook his head. "I was trying to talk to someone, but the person I was talking to didn't listen."

"Who was that?" Raoul asked with a careful enthusiasm, but was beaten by the raw answer that tasted of fuming bitterness.

"You!"

Raoul had anticipated the answer, but still felt he needed to have it thrown against his ego just as a painful remainder of his limited powers and frailty. As an Elite, he was brought up believing in his excessive worth compared to someone like Naoki and that could sometimes manifest a sense of untouchable superiority. But in the dead of the night when the barriers of social structures fell away within the surrounding bedroom walls, his passion was brought to life by a lustful creature that granted him more pleasure than his body knew how to handle. Naoki's entire being exuded ardent passion that inexorably drowned his Master and quenched his thirst for conquest. His alluring emerald green eyes eclipsed even the most seductive competitor and the entrancing charisma he possessed distinguished him from many of the other Pets at Mistral Park – even though he was the oldest among them. Unbeknownst to Raoul, an illogical and dangerous craving had devoured his soul already the first time he set eyes on Naoki – but now it was time to let it go.

Raoul stepped a little closer to the Pet, but through the unyielding body language it was clear that Naoki was not receptive to any attempt of reason and thus, the Master kept his distance.

"I am sorry--," Raoul set about, but Naoki cut him off before he had a chance to further explain himself.

"No, you're not," he impinged. "I would have made it easier for you if I had died."

"Is that what you think?"

"Would it be too far from the truth, Master? Or is it just that you can't cope with actually admitting that it would have eased your dilemma…if you have any."

Raoul was burdened by heavy thoughts, but he approached the Pet and sat down on a chair beside him. Naoki's face had regained some of its former vitality, but it was mostly due to the anger that added a healthy pink blush to his cheeks, rather then the diluted blood in his veins. He wore a black top that fitted over his chest and arms but left his abdomen bare. A set of opaque stay-ups was anchored to his string underwear with leather straps that were decorated with rivets and matched the rough untied military boots. The combination gave him a desirably dangerous look that spoke to Raoul's deepest instincts, but he suppressed them immediately. The savage desire left a sparkle of faint warmth in his belly, and the Master kept on scrutinizing the object of pleasure.

Naoki seemed numb in spirit with his hands resting loosely in his lap, eyes downcast and his red fringe partly covering the face. His body, however, was a fortress of vigor. The muscles were prominent in Naoki's thighs and he seemed more mature now then only a few days ago. His whole charisma radiated with a fully developed conscience and suddenly Raoul realized that the boy who submissively used to kneel before his Master had outgrown his own boyish skin. The soft and beautiful caterpillar had cocooned and once it ruptured, a simple moth came into the light. Raoul watched the moth that still hovered around his warmth.

"I wouldn't have wanted you to get hurt," he assured sincerely. "I wish I would have been there to stop you from hurting yourself."

"Why?" Naoki asked, still facing the window with his powerful legs placed on the windowpane.

"I know you don't believe me," the Elite grunted with a slight annoyance. "But I do care about you."

Naoki shook his head and added emphasizing. "I don't want you to CARE about me. I want you to love me…like I love you."

Raoul remained silent and Naoki continued as no reactions escaped from his Master.

"Do those words frighten you?"

"No," the Master replied calmly, but that would come to change quite soon. Naoki could feel it in the air and thus he asked: "What then?"

Raoul leaned forward as he spoke in a cold voice. "Naoki, what is love to you?"

The boy shrugged and challenged his Master.

"You tell me…a Pet is considered rather dumb so I guess I have to have it explained to me."

"It's a verb…a word of action," Raoul hissed, but Naoki wasn't the slightest affected by the anger. "It's an impulse and an affection. You feel something for someone who shows you affection. You love me since you got used to me, and perhaps because you fear what will happen outside your accustomed world. But is it really love?"

A single drop of tear ran down the face of the Pet, yet he didn't twitch a muscle.

"That's not fair," he said firmly, although his façade was crumbling.

"Love isn't fair, Naoki," Raoul added. "Not even for a Blondie."

"But you can choose," Naoki argued. "I can't."

Raoul sighed and had no intentions to continue this dispute. The moth would keep on being drawn to the flame until it would burn itself to death. That was the sad fate of a moth and Raoul couldn't do anything to stop it. Naoki would be replaced within a short time; his strong body would then wither and succumb to the longing, which would drain his essence until a broken young man spent his last breath on cold concrete floor. That was his fate – and Raoul knew, though he tried to chase the thoughts away. Naoki's only crime had been to be born with a beauty that pleased a cast high above his own. A beauty, which offered him a brief moment in the Sun and would leave him to shiver in the frozen darkness with only faded memories to warm him.

"I have arranged transport for you back to the mansion," Raoul said resolutely, although he had to use all his strength to keep the sadness from choking him. "You can stay until everything is arranged. It will give you time to finish whatever you feel needs closure. Will that be acceptable?"

"No," Naoki spoke truthfully. "But what choice do I have?"

The young man turned his head to meet with Raoul's beautiful emerald gaze and spoke in a cryptic way Raoul had never encountered before, and yet he understood the meaning of each word.

"Shame," Naoki exhaled with such empathy that it moved Raoul's own essence. The Pet whispered on hypnotically. "Such a shame…Once again, I've lost myself in you. Isn't it funny? I just wanted to hear you say my name as if the memories of me would mean something to you and once again you've thrown me into darkness. And once again…I agree to your wishes like a common prostitute even if everything inside me rebels against your sadistic behavior."

He turned to face the window again as he continued. "It's like drowning," he whispered. "Your lungs are screaming for air, yet you helplessly allow for the water to slowly choke the life out of you."

A deep dejected sigh escaped Raoul.

"Naoki, you have to stop thinking that way," the Master countered. "Love is but a dream."

"Well, I can't help that all I dream of at night is you," Naoki cut in. "I can't help what I dream. It's all I have of you, Raoul."

It was unusual for any Master to be addressed by their rightful name by an insignificant Pet. However, he let it pass for the second time.

"Just promise me that as long as you remain in my house, you won't do anything to hurt yourself again."