A/N: ok, so still not sure about this one as well, and i've hope i've done it justice, I may go back and change a couple of things later. But anyways, hope you enjoy it! And thank you to all my wonderful reviewers.

Thanks to Docvap: I'm glad it was more than you expected. I do aim for the impossible :)

Again, thanks to everyone!

Rick opened the SmartBoard he used for his murder board in his office. What Kate didn't know is that factual injustices frequented it more than his fictional ones for his novels. His password was something that she would be able to crack if she thought about it hard enough. It would have been a little embarrassing for most men to have something so sentimental, but Richard Castle was a hopeless romantic, and if she didn't know it by now, there was something wrong with her. Kate couldn't hide the blush as he typed in her badge number.

He gave her the keyboard after clicking the folder in question. This he was proud of. He made it so if anyone went looking, they wouldn't know it was about Kate, or her mother's murder, but it did pertain to her in the name.

Opening the file, Nikki Rook, she looked at him quizzically as the password notification popped up. She didn't scoff at the name of the file either, though she didn't tell him she thought it was cute either, and a bit of a spoiler.

'Always.' He said sombrely, as if waiting for her to start teasing. She took that as a cue to type in the word. This was also something she didn't rib him about. That was their thing. That's what he told her when he couldn't say I love you. Kate had known this for a while now. And she had an inkling that he would keep on saying it, forever.

But it caused trepidation the way Rick told her the password. He pulled her away from their breakfast, and her almost breakdown to show her something – something important. The way he was looking at her was not helping her nerves either. It was nervous – like he expected her to run – and also fear. His hesitance shook her. This was something he was obviously keeping from her, and this is a man who kept hardly anything to himself. The realisation that it had to be something incredibly important made her want to strip off her clothes and distract him completely, leaving this for another day; one where they hadn't spent the morning in bed and bared their souls.

Despair filled Rick's features, they looked as if he were pleading forgiveness; and it startled her. He nodded, urging her to open the file. Determination now mixed in his expression.

She hit enter, after her internal debate, fingers hovering over the enter key. Finally deciding to do as he wanted she pressed the heavy key, and was almost in tears with what she saw. Her mother's face lit up the screen; a smiling photo of Johanna was in the middle of the screen, next to Kate's academy photo. Rick had been trying to solve them both.

Not turning to look at him with the tears pouring down her face, she asked him quietly. 'Why?'

Rick let out a breath shakily, and spoke hesitantly. But she didn't turn around to him. This was like when she was at work with his crazy ideas, except the added tears and emotions coursing through her, and this wasn't one of his wacky theories.

He told her why he asked her to give up- for now at least. The secretive man in question, telling him she had to step down from the case to keep her safe. It sounded like it pained him to tell her. She wondered how long he had been doing this. She suspected when Gates dropped her shooting.

Touching her fingers to the picture of her mother over the screen, her resolve set firmly.

'I'm sorry.' he said finally. 'I was trying to solve this so you could get what you wanted. Be the person you wanted, have the relationship-'

That startled her. When she had said that to him in the park, she meant it, but she hoped that he would understand that she wanted him in that relationship with her, no one else. Now, Kate had been slowly giving in to life; letting it capture her, not wanting to let her go and she had been slowly moving away from the death of her mother. All because of this man, weaselling into her life – and her heart. This morning, she had finally given in. She wasn't going anywhere anymore. No more death wish. She had something to live for.

But of course he had to go and play with fire, trying to give her justice for her mother and herself.

'I found a few leads with your mothers case.' He continued tentatively.

'Castle, if the guy who shot me, or had my mother killed, found out about this-'

'He just never said anything about me investigating it. You couldn't, but I'm a grey area.'

'Not the point, Rick.' She said firmly.

'I'm sorry,' he said, defeat filling his tone and expression. He took a step back from her, giving her space; she didn't think the step back was him fearing for his life. But space is not what she wanted. 'I didn't think-' he cut himself off.

'That's the problem, Rick, you don't think.' Her tone was soft and quiet. 'Turn it off.' She didn't want to see this anymore. This wasn't the time or the place.

'Kate –' he started, but he did as he was told – one of the only times, she noted. 'I'll understand if you want to go.' His head rested on his chest as he studied the floor. She started walking – to him and not the door. Hearing her walk, he spoke again. 'I'm so sorry, Kate. I was only trying to give you what you wanted.'

Stopping inches from him, he looked up when he saw her feet in front of his. She cupped his cheek bringing his eyes to meet hers. 'You already have, Rick. I have you.' She kissed his lips softly, as he stood there in shock, fully expecting her to leave and never come back.

His lips finally moved with hers when she pulled back.

'You are helping me be the person I want to be. You are helping me to have the relationship I want. All I want is you.' She said biting her lip. 'I love you, Rick. Always.'

He groaned in relief at her words as he kissed her deeply.

'You don't hate me?'

'Of course not. I can be annoyed at you, angry with you, but I don't think I could ever hate you. Not now. I'm slightly peeved that you didn't think of the danger, but no, not hate.'

Grinning madly at her, he took her lips with hers, gently kissing her with as much love as he could muster.

'This is staying off for now.' She said when he let her lips go again, and motioned to the SmartBoard. He was starting to protest when she placed a finger over his lips silencing him. 'No, this stays off, until I say so. Until I'm ready. If anyone found out that you were investigating it, they won't hesitate to come after you, or Alexis or Martha. That's not going to happen. You're too important to me, and so is your family. I can't lose you.' She said strongly.

'My mom is dead, Rick. This can't bring her back. But you can bring me back, and I want to focus on that. On us.'

He stroked – no, caressed – her cheek lovingly as he bore into her eyes. The love that radiated from them didn't scare her anymore, it made her warm and tingly, like she was the luckiest girl in the world because he was looking at her like that. And Kate believed she was. He chose her. Out of every other girl on the planet, he chose her.

'I love you, too, Kate.' Rick said before capturing her lips softly, trying to convey all the love he had for her in a single kiss. It worked too, because if it hadn't been for his arms around Kate's body, she would have fallen to the floor when her legs gave way from under her.

Pulling away from her lips, he chuckled against her cheek. 'Did you actually go weak at the knees?'

Laughing at her incredible girly-ness, she nodded. 'Only you could make me weak at the knees, Richard Castle.' she said biting her lip.

He hummed as he took that lip into his mouth, his tongue playing with it, as if soothing her bite. 'I have other ways of making you weak that the knees.' He said, quickly grabbing behind her knees and pulling her up around him. Squealing happily as he carried her away from the murder board and his study. The firm grasp around her making her feel loved and safe: the thing she always wanted with the man she wanted.

A/N: And before I forget (I'm sorry for everyone who has read this already only to find the A/N is the only thing that has changed) a BIG thank you to Amanda, who has reviewed several times. It's lovely to know that my story has kept peoples interest from the beginning :) And an all round thank you to everyone who is reading this. It really is great to know that my story is liked!

After this chapter we get back to the good stuff :P