Chapter 12: Memories

Nessie's POV

To everyone else it appeared as if my father had just lost his mind. It wasn't just that he suddenly got really angry and nearly destroyed the house in anger. Nobody could forget the way he appeared to get the crap beaten out of him by nothing.

Of course I knew the truth. The second incident was my fault. I'd temporarily forgotten that my father could read my mind as easily as he could read a book. If I hadn't of remembered my rape in such graphic detail than maybe he wouldn't have completely lost his mind the way he had.

I blamed no one but myself but I was not going to admit it to anyone.

A cold hand suddenly clasped onto my shoulder. "Don't worry about him Nessie. No one knows what goes through Eddie's mind sometimes," Emmett stated.

"Does he always get upset this easily?"

"Sometimes but usually it's because someone he loves has been hurt. Who knows what it is this time,"

I didn't say anything. I just knew that it was my fault that he was upset.

"So you're the one that found me?"

He smiled a big goofy grin. "I sure am kiddo,"

"Thanks,"

He didn't say anything. Opting instead to grab me

into a near bone crushing like hug.

"Can't breathe," I wheezed out. He laughed as he released me. "Jesus you know that loving someone to death is just a saying right?"

He just laughed. "So Nessie what do you like to do for fun? Please don't say shopping please. We got enough shoppers around here as it is,"

I could've sworn I heard one of my aunts hiss but maybe I was just imagining it.

"Actually I'm not all that into shopping or fashion. I love to read and I also consider myself to be a pretty decent gamer. I love sports and wish that I could play more than anything,"

"Finally!" he shouted before grabbing me into another bone crushing hug. "Someone else in this family who has the same interests as me,"

"Uncle Emmett I can't breathe again!"

"Sorry kid just got a little excited is all,"

"Really? Because I couldn't tell at all," I laughed.

"Do you play Xbox?"

"Actually I'm more of a computer online gamer," I'd always wanted an Xbox but of course my mother wouldn't get one for me but I wasn't about to go through the misery that was my childhood all over again.

"Oh kid you don't know what you're missing,"

He quickly started teaching me the ropes of how to play Xbox games and I understood pretty quickly.

One thing I could definitely say about my uncle is that although he may appear to be extremely intimidating on the outside due to his physical appearance he was actually big softy on the inside. Just another wonderful family member that I'd been ripped away from so cruelly.

I shook my head determined to clear away the depressing thoughts. I just hoped that one day I could find out who took me and why. I could find confront them about what they'd done. Find out what motivated that them to rip a young child away from her loving family.

"Nessie watch out!" my uncle shouted just as I was about to get ambushed on screen for not paying attention. From them on out I focus on the game and only the game.

Then suddenly I felt it again. A strange feeling in one of my toes. Even stranger was that I felt an odd sensation in my foot. Feeling. I started to freak out inside because that was simply not possible. Just like before with my toe, I concentrated on the feeling, and was able to move my foot slightly. All I could think is what the hell is happening to me?! There was no possible logical explanation for what was going on. My spine was damaged and had never been fixed so why was I having these little episodes of being able to feel?

I tried to concentrate on the game to stop myself from completely freaking out about what was going on.

"Great less than two hours with her and you've already corrupted her Emmett?" Rosalie stated sounding very un-thrilled.

"Hey she likes video games," he defended.

"Nessie wouldn't you rather go shopping with Alice and I?"

"Nah," was my answer. "I'm not really into fashion. Books and games is where it's at in my opinion,"

"Well I respectfully disagree," Rosalie said.

"That's just downright insulting," Alice commented in an irritated voice. "Video games better than shopping. Never heard a more horrific sentence in my life,"

I shrugged my shoulders. "Well I have my hobbies and you have yours,"

"Oh no you don't. There is no way that any niece of mine will be more interested in gaming than shopping. You're coming with me on a shopping spree,"

"No I'd rather not,"

"Oh trust me you will I can be rather, um, persuasive,"

"You're not going to leave me alone are you?"

The innocent looking smile on her face was enough of an answer for me. Alice Cullen was not someone who would give up easily when she wanted something.

I sighed. "Okay fine I'll go shopping with you both but just not right now okay,"

She looked a little too gleeful for my taste.

I returned my full attention to the game and right away started cursing when I realized that I'd already been defeated. I might've dropped quite a few f bombs.

"Ouch!" I yelled when someone yanked on my ear. It was my grandma Esme.

"I don't tolerate such foul language in this house young lady," she scolded.

Wow she's sweet, caring, loving, and a disciplinarian all in one.

"Wow Ness I'm impressed," Uncle Emmett said. "You've got quite the mouth on you,"

"Yeah I tend to start cursing when I lose. Apparently it's a habit I should break if I value my ears," I said as I rubbed my ear which was still stinging.

"You'd better young lady," grandma agreed. "Anyway your grandfather wanted to speak with you in the kitchen,"

"About what?"

"He'll tell you right now,"

I made my way over to the kitchen wondering what he wanted to talk to me about. When I got there I found him waiting for me.

"I'm not in trouble am I?"

He smiled gently. "No Nessie you're not in trouble. I just wanted to talk to you about something. Well more like ask you to do something for me,"

"Okay?"

"This might sound extremely odd but I want you to place your hand on my cheek and think about your whole life,"

"Huh?"

"Think about your whole life. Go back as far as you can remember and replay every single memory that you can in your mind in chronological order,"

Okay that was an odd request and I wondered why he was even requesting it in the first place.

"May I ask why?"

"I'll tell you afterward if what I think is going to happen does happen,"

His convoluted explanations didn't answer any of my questions but I didn't appear to have a choice. Oh well it's not like anything could come from carrying out such an odd request.

So I placed my hand on his cheek just like he wanted and closed my eyes. I went all the way back to my earliest memories of waking up in the hospital with no memory and no use of my legs. I relieved all the emotions I felt at the time. I remembered the day I was adopted. It was the happiest day of my life that quickly turned into a nightmare when the verbal abuse and neglect started.

I remembered in vivid detail the bullying endured in school. The teasing and taunting I endured because of my disability.

I remembered my elementary and middle school graduations and how hurt I felt when my own mother didn't even bother to show up. Why would she though when. She made it clear on a daily basis that she never gave a shit about me anyway. All I could remember was the strong sadness and loneliness I felt when I saw all the other kids celebrating with their families and I wasn't.

As I got into my high school years the bullying hadn't gotten much better. I was still taunted and teased for being paralyzed.

Then the rape came in vivid graphic detail. I remembered every excruciating detail that night. The way they'd grabbed me from the wheelchair and threw me on the ground. The way they took pleasure in hitting me until I was a nasty shade of black and blue. The way they removed my pants and took turns raping me. The way they took off laughing with all my belongings and eating the donuts I had just bought. The only item they bothered to leave was my wheelchair.

I remembered the pregnancy that followed and the way I felt when I lost the baby.

The rape and pregnancy was the hardest of my memories to relive and replay and I wondered why I was even bothering to do it.

Meeting ghost Bella for the first time flashed into my mind. Her mission for me and what she wanted me to do. The way I felt when I learned she was my real mother and the Cullens were my real family. It all played through my mind.

That was it.

I opened my eyes and removed my hand from my grandfather's face. I looked at my grandfather and couldn't even decipher all the emotions I could see hidden behind his golden eyes.

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