Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, dialogue, quotes, et cetera related to the Twilight Saga are the property of Stephenie Meyer and or the property of their respective owners. Play on lyrics of Constant Craving belongs to K.D. Lang and Ben Mink. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended. The original plot is the property of the author. Also this is my fictional version of Forks to help suit the story better and has no reflection on the real town of Forks, Washington whatsoever.
A/N: A tremendous amount of gratitude to my lovely beta the very talented abbymickey24; if you enjoy non-canon please check out her stories, she's fabulous. A very special thank you to Nic for starting my love of slash, I miss you my dear friend. Also a heartfelt thank you and much flove to my sisters/cheerleaders/partners in crime: Misty, Brandi and Cricket for all their help and encouragement along the way.
~o0o~
Dedicated to Brad Wade; gone, but never forgotten.
~o0o~
~Chapter 12~ Forks Old Fashioned 4th of July ~ Carlisle's point of view...
The sound of my alarm going off has me dreading the thought of getting out of bed. I already know how hectic this day is going to be before stepping one foot out of my house. To most, the Fourth of July is a day to celebrate our independence; it's a fun filled day full of parades, barbeques and fireworks. Except for myself and the staff of my emergency department, it's a day filled with disquiet; and it made me even more grateful that I no longer work the night shift.
Stepping outside, I look up to the sky, the morning is partly cloudy and it's suppose to top out at seventy-three degrees today, with our next chance of rain not coming until Sunday; as of right now, it looks like Forks' Old Fashioned Fourth of July festivities will go off with a bang.
I swing by to pick Bella up for work, no reason for her to drive in when we'll both be back here for Charlie's famous barbeque right after our shift ends; it's become somewhat of our tradition over the years.
Upon my arrival, Bella comes out the front door and trudges down her porch steps; looking every bit as thrilled as I feel this morning. She's only wearing plain blue scrubs; just that alone already sums up her mood for the day. She opens the passenger side door and flops herself down in the seat, pulling the seatbelt across her and locking it in place.
"Morning, sweetheart," I greet as I pull out of her driveway.
Bella laughs sarcastically, "Ah, I see you opted to leave the good out of that, yeah, morning to you, too, doc. Sooo, you want to start taking bets now on when the first imbecile will come in?"
"Well if last year is anything to go by, I'd say probably before noon." I reply wearily.
"True, though I'm hoping more towards the end of our shift. I still haven't gotten over when Erin Teague came in from the cherry bomb exploding in his hand when he thought it was a dud. I swear his bloody, skeletal hand will haunt me forever." she says cloyingly with a queasy quiver.
"I wholeheartedly agree, it wasn't worth him losing his hand over, that's for sure. I just wish they would treat explosives with a lot more respect than they do." I reply and turn left onto Bogachiel Way.
"Yeah, but I have a bad feeling they'll never learn." she mutters as she slumps down further into the leather seat, closing her eyes and sighing softly.
"Are you feeling okay? You already look exhausted and we haven't even reached the hospital yet." I ask, in a concerned tone.
"Yeah," she starts to answer and then stifles a yawn, "I was just up late last night doing the food prep for today, along with a ton of baking. I even made a double batch of your favorite caramel macchiato cheesecake sugar cookie cups along with a big pan of turtle brownies and I was heavy handed with the caramel." she tells me with a beatific smile.
"You really didn't have to do all that, though I appreciate it. You're too good to me, thank you, sweetheart." I say appreciatively as I pull into my parking spot at the hospital and cut the engine off.
"You're welcome, doc, you're my family and I take care of my family, or more so, spoil in this case." she replies smilingly.
Getting out of the car, I walk around and open the door for Bella, offering her my hand. We head towards the entrance and find Jasper waiting for us by the automatic door, with three large to-go coffees from A Shot In the Dark.
In lieu of a greeting, Jasper picks up one of the cup, "A Ghirardelli mocha for the little lady," he says handing Bella a to-go cup, "and a caramel macchiato for you, darlin'." he winks, handing me my cup.
Bella and I thank him for the coffee, appreciating the sweet gesture.
"What did you get, Jasper?" Bella asks, then takes a long savoring sip from her cup and moans at the flavor.
Jasper and I both answer "Americano" simultaneously, causing Bella to give both of us a goofy grin as she giggles.
"I swear the two of you are totally made for each other," she states with a big smile. "Cowboy, just because you were in the military doesn't mean your coffee can't have some flavor, live a little, add some spice." she teases playfully.
"Carlisle is all the spice I need, Swan." Jasper replies suggestively.
"Oh-god." she groans and shudders, "Great, that's so not a thought I needed to have, ugh, spunk flavored coffee."
Jasper and I both give her an incredulous look, not believing she just said that out loud. We all break out laughing as we walk through the automatic door into the hospital.
As our laughter dies down, Jasper tugs at Bella's hair, "Well, ya were the one to recommend I add some cream to my coffee." Jasper razzes her, smirking his sexy ass off.
"Oh-god, just no, so many levels of wrong..." Bella say disgustedly as she waves us off and heads straight for the nurses' station.
Jasper and I laugh heartedly and follow right behind her, ready to start our shift.
~o0o~
The morning isn't off to a bad start so far; the few remaining patients from the night shift are easily treated and sent home to recuperate. Jasper excuses himself shortly before seven-am, having a scheduled appointment with Alistair; I'm glad to hear he's doing better on the new medication Jasper had prescribed him.
Just after seven-thirty, Mr. Jefferson is brought in suffering from a dairy allergy; wheezing and broken out in hives. After I get him breathing better, he informs me that while eating at the Elks Annual Fourth of July Breakfast, one of the volunteers misinformed him about there being milk in the scrambled eggs. After he's doing better, I write him out a prescription for a new EpiPen and discharge him.
Just before eight-am, Mrs. Stanley comes limping in, swearing to do bodily harm to some guy named Jimmy Choo; I'm not sure what this man did to upset her, though if looks could kill. Once I get Mrs. Stanley situated on the gurney, she then explains that when she went to step down off her store's float for the Grand Parade, the heel of her stiletto pump broke off, causing her to twist her ankle. After an exam and x-ray, I inform her it's only badly sprained. I wrap up her ankle, get her a pair of crutches and she's out the automatic doors; heading back to Forks Outfitters.
As predicted, night hasn't even fallen yet and the townsfolk are already toying with fireworks. First up around eleven-am is a set of seven-year-old twins, Stacey and Steve. While being supervised playing with sparklers, they were twirling around, lost their balance and tumbled into each other; they both ended up with severe second and third-degree burns on their hands and forearms. I'll never understand how parents can think a glowing, sparking stick that can reach temperatures upward of eighteen-hundred-degrees, is safe for young children to play with.
Jasper shows back up at noon with Subway sandwiches in hand. He drags Bella and I off to the staff lounge for a quick lunch. He keeps us thoroughly entertained, getting us to laugh numerous times, to the point Bella almost chokes on a bite of her sandwich; then he teases her about doing the Hinny Lick maneuver, causing her to choke on her giggle-snort. Jasper's shenanigans help make this day so far exceedingly tolerable; just more proof why I love this man so much.
Come twelve-thirty-pm, Whitney a member of the Forks High Marching Band, is the next one to suffer a sprained ankle, along with fracturing her right wrist and a nasty case of road rash on the palms of her hands. Somehow, while she was marching with her fellow band members, her feet got tangled up and she tripped; falling hard onto the asphalt road. Another wrap, crutches and a cast later; and I had her discharged and back out the door to finish watching the rest of the parade from the sidelines this time.
Shortly after one-pm. Anne, a member of the Lions Club comes in with a second-degree burn to her right hand. When she was helping with the Salmon Bake at the park, the oven pad slipped and she ended up grabbing the pan with her bare hand, thankfully she turned loose in time and didn't end up with a more severe burn.
Just before three-pm, Adam, Doug and Kevin, a group of young inebriated men come in, having thought it would be gnarly to imitate a internet video they'd seen and shoot roman candles at one another in a twisted version of dodgeball. They were treated for a varying degree of burns, derma trauma and an eye injury.
Kristie, a sixteen-year-old girl, is the next casualty to be brought in due to a roman candle. Shortly after her boyfriend lit the candle it blew up right above her hand, leaving her with second and third degree burns; thankfully all the flesh on her fingers stayed mostly intact. Much to Bella's relief, though by the green hue of her skin, I'd say she's having flashbacks over Erin's skeletal hand again.
Throughout the day, we continue to treat numerous firecracker injuries; from homemade firecrackers, to Lady Fingers, to Black cats, all the way up to the illegal M-80. Luckily the only damage the M-80 did was temporary hearing loss, it could have been consequently much worse.
The most serious injury of the day so far, is when Joshua a nineteen-year-old was hit by a wayward bottle rocket, bursting right on impact; causing him major facial and upper torso third degree burns as well as probably ending up with permanent vision loss in his left eye. We dressed the wounds and medicated him for pain to make him as comfortable as we could, then he was medevaced to Seattle to the nearest burn ward.
The next wounded by the Fourth of July festivities come in twenty minutes to five, two Demolition Derby drivers, Stefan and Victor; both suffering from whiplash and a concussion from their head on collision. The only differences was one driver needed his bottom lip stitched up when he bit straight through it after hitting the steering wheel, and the other needed his shoulder popped back into place when he dislocated it. Both men were utterly ecstatic that their cars got totaled and they landed themselves in the ER.
Figuring it would be wrong not to share all this fun, I have Bella ask Jasper to come give them a psych consult, plus the added bonus of getting to see him again for a few moments didn't hurt anything either.
Jasper shows up and once he realizes why he's here, he's entirely amused. The guys however, seem ill-at-easy being near him and share looks of leeriness; like they might catch being gay from him. Jasper starts off asking a few basic questions, and then good-naturedly teases the guys about their mental health. Before long, they're all joking around and chatting like long lost buddies. I chalk it up to his natural charisma, if anyone would give him an honest chance; they'd find it's damn near impossible not to like him, and in my case, love him.
As I'm passing Stefan and Victor's charts off to Dr. Snow, I overhear them inviting Jasper to next year's Demolition Derby and they even try to talk him into entering a car. After a bit more bantering, they all shake hands. The guys' then part telling Jasper, he's all right by them; I'd say Jasper made two new friends today.
Ten-minutes till six-pm, I drag my tired ass off to the men's locker room to change into jeans and a t-shirt, wanting to go more casual than normal; hoping I'll just get to relax for the rest of the day.
By the end of our shift, it's almost hard to imagine we've treated injuries due to sparklers, Roman candles, firecrackers, and a bottle rocket; better than half of them will end up with permanent scarring. As the night shift arrives, we're more than happy to hand off our duties to them; wishing them good luck and hopefully a quiet night.
Bella, Jasper and I head out to the parking lot, chatting lively amongst us, glad to have this part of our day over with and looking forward to the upcoming barbeque.
~o0o~
On the drive over, a feeling of apprehension starts to settle over me. A slue of 'what ifs' start to dance around like rotten sugarplums in my head. I'm not sure how I'll be able to do this with Jasper tonight. Will I be able to hide my true feelings for him? When I want nothing more than to reach out and touch him, hold his hand, caress his lips with mine; show them all he's the one I love…
As if she knows where my thoughts have gone, Bella gives me a reassuring smile and lovingly squeezes my arm in support. I give her a small smile and a nod in return.
I also haven't spent anytime at Bella's since she surprised us with the picnic. I have a feeling, it'll be hard to spend time in the backyard and not be overwhelmed by memories of that amazing night together.
Jasper and I returned her surprise by sending her a huge bouquet of peonies and hyacinth to the hospital. Along with a thank you note; thanking her for everything she does and what a truly amazing person she is. We then signed the thank you card from Cj. We also added two, one-hundred-dollar gift certificates; one to her favorite restaurant in Sequim, and the other to her favorite spa. All the nursing staff was a buzz, trying to figure out who this mysterious Cj might be, and Bella had a bit too much fun leading them in circles over the mystery man for the rest of her shift.
~o0o~
By the time Bella and I pull up to her house there's already numerous cars and trucks parked out front. I find a spot out of the way to park and Jasper pulls up along side me. Jasper opens the passenger door for Bella and offers her his hand, helping her out of my car.
"I'm going to head on in and change out of my scrubs. I'll meet up with you boys in the backyard in a bit." Bella informs us and then bounces up the porch steps, heading on into the house.
"Okay, we'll see you then. Holler if you need any help." I call out to her retreating form.
Jasper and I walk along the cement pathway that leads around the side of the house going into the backyard, where I can already hear the boisterous voices of a large group of people chatting lively.
Charlie's famous barbeque is more of a hodgepodge of police and hospital personnel, along with long time family friends; most of them visiting from La Push. Every year I pitch in two-hundred-dollars for the barbeque, Jasper heard and chipped in the same amount too, when Bella invited him to join us this year.
I see most of Charlie's friends from La Push are already here; Sue and Harry Clearwater with their two kids; Seth and Leah. Billy and Sarah Black, with their son Jake; who married Leah a few years back and she's now heavily pregnant with their first child. I also spot, Paul talking to Jared and Kim, Sam and Emily, along with several others wandering about.
I hear Billy state, "You know I'm down with the kids." and he follows his statement with a poor imitation of a rapper's hand gesture.
Charlie laughs hard, giving his dear friend an incredulous look, then in a mocking tone he replies with, "Oh yeah, dude, you're the bomb." They play box next to the grill, dodging pretend blows and laugh some more. Sarah comes up laughing and shakes her head, dragging Billy towards the house, stating she needs his help and to stop fooling around before he breaks a hip; more laughter trails behind them.
Jasper looks to be utterly amused by the group of people. Charlie soon spots us and calls Jasper over to the grill; using his grilling spatula, Charlie points out a few of the surrounding people, and then introduces Jasper to Jake and Harry, who's helping man the grill with him.
They seem to greet him kindly and they all shake hands, sharing affable smiles. Several others stroll over to introduce themselves also; all of them, shaking hands or clapping him on the shoulder, welcoming him to the area. Charlie calls over a few of his deputies and I watch the friendly greetings once more. It truly warms my heart to see them all being so accepting of him, making me wonder, what if?
I watch as Nora comes over and hands Charlie several packages of hotdogs, he thanks her with a sly smile. Charlie has profusely proclaimed to be a terminal bachelor after his wife left him to raise their two kids; though Bella and I both know he's having a secret liaison with his best friend Billy's, little sister: Nora. And by the looks of them over by the grill right now, they weren't doing a good job of hiding it today. They had their complications too, with Nora being the sister of the Tribal Chief; it's expected of her to settle down with Thomas Uley and not someone like Charlie.
Waylon's guffawing catches my attention and looking over I see he already looks several sheets to the wind, he's galumphing around, animatedly talking to Cora, who seems to be humoring him the best she can and trying to keep him upright.
Looking around the backyard, seeing almost everyone paired off; holding hands, with arms wrapped around one another, and loving kisses being pressed to cheeks and temples; it all has me trying my damnedest not to be in a sour mood. I hate the fact that Jasper's close by and I can't even touch him; let alone allow my true feeling for him to show. However, would it really be all that scandalous if this group of people knew about us?
More loud laughter brings me out of my contemplation, and I spot Bella coming out the back door, and have to do a double take at the black t-shirt she has changed into, but then I can only laugh and shake my head. It isn't that it's risqué or anything like that, but simply for the fact that it has five words down the front. Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, and Straight are all written in gray and each has an empty box next to it. The last word is Human written in rainbow colors and the box is now checked. It is a very clear message where she stands on her beliefs and it also seems appropriate for today; and I have to admit, I love seeing her wearing it.
"Are you trying to stir up shit with the narrow-minded bigots tonight, sweetheart?" I ask quietly, pointing to her shirt as she walks up. I doubt no one here at the barbeque will take issue with her wearing it or at least not voice it, though, later on at the park, it will be a different story.
"Nah… well maybe a little." she says as she holds her fingers up an inch apart and giving me a wink along with a mischievous smile. "It's really Garrett's fault though. He sent it to me after I saw him wearing it in his new selfie on Facebook and commented that I loved it. He also sent Charlie a key ring version of it and he's already got it attached to his truck keys."
She hands me a chilled bottle of Snapple peach tea and I thank her as I kiss her cheek.
"Swan, I'm lovin' that shirt, where the hell did ya find it, girl." Jasper asks as he pulls her in for a quick hug.
"My brother sent it to me from Florida. I thought it fitting to wear on Independence Day." she replies proudly with a heartwarming smile.
"Hell yeah! Yer gonna set tongues waggin' for sure around here." Jasper heartily laughs, his eyes sparkling with mirth.
"They can wag all they want and fuck'em if they can't take it." Bella asserts and grins from ear to ear.
"Ya go girl..." Jasper starts to say as I notice Missus Lillian tottering in our direction with cane in hand, her gaze solely fixated on Jasper.
"Are you that queer boy everyone keeps fussing about?" Lillian asks Jasper straightforwardly, once she's right in front of him.
"Um- yes ma'am." Jasper answers slightly apprehensive and I struggle not to reach out and grab his hand.
"You don't pay no mind to all the imbeciles around here talking out their hind-ends. From what I've seen, you're a fine boy and don't you allow anyone to tell you who you can and can't be with; you love who you want, sonny." Lillian says with her toothless grin and then leans in to hug Jasper.
"Thank ya kindly, ma'am." Jasper drawls a bit bashfully and bewildered as he hugs her back, giving me an unbelieving look over the top of her head.
Letting go of Jasper, Lillian steps back with a pensive look. "It's an awful shame Garrett isn't here with us, he'd sure take a fancy to you. Although..." she pauses looking intently between Jasper and I, while I fight the possessive urge to tell her he's mine; imagining myself having a caveman moment where I toss him over my shoulder, take him back to my cave and fuck the living hell out of him, claiming him as mine. I try my best to push the overwhelming irrational jealousy away, and at the sound of my name being said, I'm brought back to reality, "Carlisle and you sure would make a really handsome couple, too bad he..." she carries on with a wave of her wrinkled up hands back-and-forth between Jasper and I.
I'm stunned stupid by her comment and I feel a cold chill settle over my heart. Does she know? Before I can full on panic, I hear Bella making a strangled-choking-coughing sort of noise and she clears her throat, "Missus Lillian, I could really use your help for a moment."
"Oh sure, sweetie, what do you need?" Lillian asks and thankfully all thoughts of Jasper and I are momentarily forgotten.
Bella mentions something about pies and leads Lillian away over to one of the many folding tables laden with pies and other sweet treats.
Jasper and I share a stunned look, "Ya alright?" he asks in a hushed tone and I notice his hand start to move toward mine, before he quickly pulls it back to his side.
Blowing out a breath, "I think so, she just caught me off guard and unnerved me a bit is all." I reply honestly and Jasper nods his head.
"Guys come eat." Bella hollers out to all of us. "There's plenty to go around, so if you go home hungry, it's your own damn fault."
All of the guest start swarming the tables like starving locust. Bella walks up, handing Jasper and I an empty plate. We start moving towards the eight-foot-long folding tables loaded down with food. We have a huge spread of barbeque foods to choose from; one table looks like Charlie has every grilled meat imaginable; burgers, steak, hot dogs, chicken and five varieties of kebabs, along with a huge platter of Harry's famous fish fry.
The table next to it is loaded down with all the side dishes; the first to catch my eye being one of my all time favorites, Lillian's pineapple coleslaw. There's also a large Crockpot full of baked beans and another with grilled corn on the cob. There's several huge bowls full of salads; macaroni, two types of potato, broccoli, waldorf, ambrosia, and diced fresh fruit. Lastly there's an enormous veggie platter, along with several types of dip.
The last table is full of nothing but sweet treats; my favorite, caramel macchiato cheesecake sugar cookie cups, along with a dozen other varieties of cookies, the turtle brownies, and s'mores bars. When Bella mentioned pies early, I didn't think she meant all of this; it looks like there's an apple, blueberry, cherry, lemon, strawberry rhubarb, pecan and several cream pies.
Everyone starts dishing up a bit of everything. I pick up a few kabobs, a scoop of coleslaw, broccoli salad, a slice of watermelon and then grab a couple of my caramel cookies. Jasper loads his plate with a piece of steak, baked beans, potato salad, corn on the cob and then gets a slice of pecan pie.
Bella, Jasper and I take a seat at one of the empty picnic tables; she sits down next to me and Jasper takes the seat right across from me. With a few murmurs of how good everything looks, we start to enjoy our meal. Looking across at Jasper between bites, I hate that he's so close, yet still far away; and I wish I could rest my hand on his thigh, like so many times before.
Just as I feel Jasper nudge my foot, I see Billy approach our table. "Doctor Whitlock, I'd like to introduce myself; I'm Chief, Billy Black of the Quileute tribe from La Push, I wanted to welcome you to the area." Billy says pleasantly and holds his hand out to Jasper before they share a sturdy handshake.
"Please just Jasper will do, and it's a pleasure to meet ya, Sir." Jasper greets in return.
"Charlie has told me what a good man you are. I know there's a lot of hateful ignorance in this town, however, you're more than welcome out on our reservation anytime." Billy offers graciously and then silently nods his head over in the direction of two older Quileute teens standing by one of the tables.
I notice Embry, Jake's younger cousin, acting bashful around Jon Ateara. I watch as Jon runs the tips of his fingers down the back of Embry's hand and what looks like a loving caress, Embry blushes and wraps his pinky finger around Jon's; how did I not notice them earlier? "That's special, sacred to my people." Billy says with a benevolent smile.
Jasper smiles beautifully and nods his head at Billy, "I agree and thank you for yer kind offer, Sir. The next time I have some time off, I'll be sure to come by. I've heard yer beaches are a sight to behold."
"No need for any of that sir stuff, Billy will do…" I hear Billy begin to say, as the rest of their conversation blends into background noise and everything else fades away…
I'm a bit taken back by Billy's words, all these years and I never knew the Quileute's have such beliefs.
How had I never known that only fifteen-miles away I would have been accepted for whom I am? That I could of had a safe haven to go to, maybe someone to talk too all those years ago when I felt so lost and alone. Looking back at the young lovers, I'm glad they don't have to endure the same fate that I did growing up here surrounded by prejudice.
I take another bite of food absentmindedly and chew, my mind going in a thousand different directions at once.
Several more people come and go, all welcoming Jasper with true kindness. It continues to warm my heart to see how everyone here is at ease around Jasper and they're acceptance of him. It makes me think back to when Bella told me I might be surprised by a few others that would be supportive; could this be what she was referring too? Could this group of people truly accept me for who I am, even more so, Jasper and I as a couple? My mind feels completely addled at that notion.
Feeling overwhelmed, I excuse myself from the table and head inside to the restroom. After splashing some cold water on my face, I lean up against the counter and try to regain my composure. I take several deep breaths and exhale slowly as I struggle not to let all these conflicting feelings consume me.
~o0o~
Returning from the bathroom, I notice our once lively group has fallen into a sort a food coma; likely due to our overindulging. Looking around, I don't see Jasper anywhere. As I'm about to walk over and ask Bella where he could be, my phone buzzes with an incoming text message.
Opening the text, I see it's from Jasper, 'At the gazebo, come join me.'
Glancing around, I find no one seems to be paying any attention to me, so I make my way over to the dirt path and step onto the trail, heading towards the gazebo. After a few steps, I pick up my pace, wanting to be with my boy.
Once I reach the gazebo, I find him sitting on the edge of the railing. I watch as he parts his legs open and pats his hands on the tops of his thighs, in an invitation to join him.
Walking over to him, I stand between his parted legs. They immediately wrap around the back of mine, and he pulls me closer into him. We simultaneously wrap our arms around each other, and rest our hands on our lower backs. Resting our foreheads together, I close my eyes and breathe him deeply in; his intoxicating scent washes over me, calming my frazzled nerves.
Leaning in ever so slightly, I place a tender kiss to his lips, just needing that extra bit of closeness. After our chaste kiss, we both murmur, I love yous.
"Ya doin' alright, babe? A few times ya looked a bit distracted, conflicted even." Jasper asks in a caring tone, tightening his grip around me.
"I think so. I'm a bit overwhelmed, maybe. It was great seeing you being so openly accepted for a change; it just has me contemplating." I answer a bit disconcerted.
"Yeah, they're good people, I'm glad to see there's some decency around here. How'd it all make ya feel?" Jasper inquires solicitously.
I'm not sure if he's trying to psychoanalyzing me, and whether I like it or not; I know it's in his nature, so I answer him honestly, nonetheless. I try to put my chaotic thoughts into words, "Hopeful, I guess. Knowing there's this small group of people that will probably accept us, and not judge us for loving each other and being together; it's sort of liberating in a way. Though, there are all the rest of them, too, and it still feels like we're outnumbered by all the bigotry. There's also my father, too; I'm not sure if I'm ready to lose him permanently yet."
"What makes you so sure you will? He might just surprise you." Jasper says in an encouraging tone.
"It's just who he is, his beliefs run too deep and I'm afraid he won't ever compromise them; even for me." I reply disheartened.
"Well, darlin', I can understand that and like I told ya before, I'm happy to go at yer pace, what's best for you, is best for me. If ya still want to wait till he passes, then so be it," he states earnestly. "However, would it be terribly atrocious of me to hope the old grouch gets struck by lightning before then?" Jasper asks jokingly with a mischievous smile.
His jesting lightens my mood, "No, not at all, have to say the thought has crossed my mind a time or two," I lightly chuckle and then my mood wanes a bit, "and thank you for saying all that, it truly means a lot to me; though, I still wish I could do this for you, for us. I loathe that I've dragged you back into the closet with me and I'm sorry for being such a coward."
"Yer welcome and I'll never see you as a coward. Hell, darlin', it's only been several months since we met, I'm not expecting ya to turn yer whole world upside down and come out waving a rainbow flag and start declaring yer gay to everyone in that short amount of time. Over the years ya got damn good at hidin' away and I know that's ingrained in you now, and it won't be easy to change right away; old habits are hard to break.
"Besides, like I said before, I get why yer strugglin' with this, I know what yer father means to you; though that doesn't mean I like hearing how wrongly he treats you. I get that he's your family, for better or for worse. It's just more proof of what a truly remarkable man you are, that you still care so much for the guy, when the rest of us can clearly see he doesn't deserve an ounce of it."
"Thank you... I don't know what I ever did to deserve you..." I say feeling lost for words and overly emotional.
"Anytime, babe, we'll get through this. When the time is right, we'll know; till then we'll just take each day as it comes, so no more of this coward bullshit." he says with an endearing smile and then grabs and squeezes both cheeks of my ass, "By the way, yer ass looks incredible in these jeans; ya should wear them more often, darlin'."
"You've also said the same thing about me wearing scrubs." I quip and simper.
"That is true, ya do look fuckin' sexy as all hell in scrubs, and they make me wanna drop to my knees and suck yer cock every time I see ya in them; though, these jeans, damn, I just wanna bend ya over, bite yer ass and then bury myself balls deep." he replies seductively, squeezing each cheek of my ass for emphasis as his mocha eyes darken with desire.
My cock twitches at his lecherous words and I thrust my rigid cock against him; feeling he's just as hard as I am. "God I want you, need to feel you in..." I moan huskily.
"Fuck." he cries out and pulls me impossibly closer to him, crushing his lips into mine hungrily.
Completely consumed, we kiss more fervently, our tongues delve into each other's mouths; tasting the sweet nuttiness of the pecan pie from earlier. We sensually grind against each other, there's barely a breath of air between us. Our hands tangle in each other's hair as the palm of my other hand snakes up under his shirt, caressing the warm, bare flesh of his back. His other hand finds its way down the back of my jeans and boxers, his fingertips trailing along the crack of my ass, slightly dipping in. We moan into each other's mouths and deepen our kiss further; needing more, always needing more.
The sound of a wolf whistle startles us and we instantly cease our movement, "Well damn, if that isn't the hottest thing I've seen all week." Bella exclaims puckishly, grinning widely at catching us. "Come on you two, we're starting to clean up and we need to head on over to the park soon or we'll miss the fireworks."
With a disgruntled groan from the both of us, I untangle myself and step back out of Jasper's embrace. Jasper mock glares at Bella as he hops down off the railing, muttering "Cockblocker" under his breath. Bella hears him anyways and does this girly little giggle.
"Aw, come on, cowboy, you'll live to ride another day." Bella quips laughingly.
Jasper harrumphs, and steps down out of the gazebo. "Dont'cha forget, Swan, I know where ya live." Jasper feign threatens, reaching out and ruffling up her hair.
"Hey..." she pushes his hand away and then shoves his shoulder laughing.
As they continue to banter back and forth, and squabble like siblings, I can't help that a huge part of me is beyond gratefully it was only Bella who caught us; though deep down, that indecisive part of me, wonders if we were outed, would it really be so bad.
"You two are acting ridiculous." I scoff in amusement, trying to stifle my laugh.
"She started it." He started it." they both protest amiably in unison, shoving at each other again as we continue to walk. I laugh out loud at their antics and shake my head.
As we head further back down the trail, Bella and Jasper keep teasing one another; she skips along dodging his roughhousing and she tries to trip him in return. I love seeing them getting along so well, it gives me an unusual feeling of completion; both of my worlds merging together seamlessly, harmoniously.
The three of us, finally step out into the backyard laughing, probably looking like a bunch of goofs. Charlie spots us and his expression turns thoughtful, then to what looks like a knowing smile. I try to let it go and not over analyze what his expression might mean, I already have enough to deal with for one night.
We all pitch in and help clean up the remains of the barbeque. Twenty-minutes later everything is put away and the remaining guest are making plans on where to meet up at Tillicum Park and what spots they hope to get to watch the firework display.
Everyone starts saying thank yous, goodbyes and see yous soon, as we all head around the house towards our parked vehicles. When I reach my car, I open the passenger door for Bella; she hops in the car as Jasper gets in his, saying he'll follow us over to the park.
~o0o~
We arrive at the park and find it decked out in red, white and blue, the whole place screams patriotic. It appears the majority of the town is already here to celebrate. The crowd is full of anticipation and excitement as everyone bustles around trying to find the perfect spot to watch the upcoming firework show.
Walking around, I'm greeted courteously by several past patients. I even spot Lorraine standing next to a tall man that has her wrapped up in his embrace, his right hand resting protectively on her small baby bump. She waves and smiles at me and I wave back; pleased to see she's looking healthier and happier.
There are kids running amuck with glow sticks, a few others merrily waving around sparklers in the air, trying to write out their names and other words; and I can't help my internal cringe, thinking back about the twins from earlier.
The people that notice Bella's shirt scrunch up their faces in disapproval and sneer at her. Bella being Bella, just gives them the biggest eat-shit-grin she can and adds a little bounce to her step; making me love my best friend just a bit more.
"Oh, this way," Bella says suddenly and drags Jasper and I over to Charlie's empty truck parked at the edge of the park. She drops the tailgate down and hops up in the middle, then pats her hands down on each side of her, "Come on you two, come sit next to me." she tells Jasper and I. He just grins and hops up on her left side and I give her a questioning look, wondering what she's up too. She just grins and pats the empty spot next to her, conceding I hop up and take a seat.
It doesn't take me long to find out. The park lights start to dim to a very faint light until they turn out altogether. I catch Bella out of the corner of my eye looking around to see if anyone is paying us any attention.
The first firework shoots high up in the sky bursting into a bright red that turns into twinkling silver stars as it falls. Bella gives a sort of fake shiver as she 'brrs' and rubs up and down her bare arms, "It's a bit chilly tonight and I forgot to grab my sweater." she announces as she reaches over and grabs my arm and drapes it around her back and then snuggles into my side. "Somewhat better, but..." she mutters, then reaches over grabbing onto Jasper's arm and drapes it also around her back, laying his arm atop of mine. She snuggles us all closer together and with a contented sigh, "Ah, perfect. All toasty warm now, thanks boys." she says all too innocently. She's my meddling pain in the ass, but I love her for it right now.
I can hear Jasper snigger under his breath as trios of colors burst in the night sky, the surrounding 'Oohs' and 'Aahs' as the crowd watches the falling embers sparkle and then flicker out.
The Forks High School band starts playing a medley of patriotic songs. Several sparkling balls shoot up in an array of vibrant colors bursting into willowy patterns; the long trails twinkling as they fall back towards the ground. A mixture of white, red and blue balls of light soar up high into the night sky, twisting and swirling out in all different directions, and then exploding into bright rays of light.
Knowing they're mere minutes away from setting off the grand finale, I look around and notice all eyes on the sky. I lean behind Bella; Jasper notices and does the same, we tilt closer together as a burst of brilliant color and thunderous noise fills the night sky. Our lips softly brush against each other's. We quickly deepen our kiss to the sound of 'Oohs' and 'Aahs'.
Hearing the strains of Stars and Stripes Forever coming to a close, I place one last peck to his soft lips. I gaze into his dark eyes twinkling with the firelight raining down from the sky and I mouth, 'I love you'.
With a look of total adoration he mouths back, 'I love you, too.'
I straighten up just as the last burst of multi-color explosions light up the sky, followed by loud cheers of yay, whistles, whoops and vigorous clapping.
Bella gives me a sly side glance that quickly turns into a radiant smile; she hops down and turns to face us. "Best Fourth of July ever." she sing-songs happily, then twirls around and waves to a group of people, they wave back and she heads over their way.
Jasper and I just shake our heads in amusement, lightly chuckling at her cheerfulness. However, I'd have to wholeheartedly agree, this truly is the best one ever.
Jasper and I slide off of the tailgate, back onto the ground. We watch as all the other people either start to leave or mill around chatting amongst themselves. I take a step and pause when Jasper speaks up.
"I got to talkin' to Bella earlier and she said you can leave yer car at her place tonight and come home with me if ya want. It should be dark enough that no one will even notice us. Then she'll come over in the morning and pick ya up in her car. If by chance you get called in, you can take my car and we'll figure out a cover story later." Jasper whispers in a roguish tone.
"What about the Berty's?" I ask uncertainly, not wanting to get my hopes up yet.
"The Berty's left this morning and I heard they'll be gone for the weekend, something about spending the holiday with their son over in Tacoma." Jasper explains in a wistful tone.
Giving it some quick thought and knowing we didn't have work in the morning, I go to agree, thinking I could be back in time to take my father shopping and if he were to ask, I'd just tell him I stayed at Bella's last night. It will undoubtedly piss him off, but it will be worth it to spend the entire night with Jasper.
"Carlisle!" Esme calls loudly from behind me; I internally groan and give Jasper an apologetic look. I turn towards the sound of Esme's voice, and see her hastily walking towards me. "I've been looking all over for you." she says exasperatedly with a reproachful expression, once she's standing in front of me.
"Is there something wrong?" I inquire warily, wishing I could somehow make her instantly disappear.
Esme looks Jasper up and down and then gives him a distasteful look before she then turns her attention back to me like he's not even here. "What's wrong is I haven't seen you in a week and I was looking forward to spending some time with you tonight. I've missed you." she answers sweetly.
"Sorry to disappoint you, though I'm leaving and heading back to Be..." I try to say, until she interrupts me rudely.
"Oh, that sounds like a lovely idea. I'll follow you over to the duplex and we can have a cup of evening tea and talk about our plans for tomorrow. I've already discussed everything with Eli, and he thinks it's a wonderful idea if you'll escort me to the Open Aire Market in the morning, then I can help you with your shopping for the week. After that we can head back to your place and I'll make an early dinner for the three of us; oh I know, I'll even make your favorite, chicken parmesan casserole, I know how much you love it and..."
As Esme is prattling along oblivious to the rest of us, Jasper gives me an 'Is she for real?' look. I slightly nod my head in reply and wish once more that she'd disappear and I wouldn't have to deal with her anymore.
As Esme continues to prattle on, I notice Jasper's expression turning more repugnant by the second, and it looks like he's only seconds away from wanting to throttle her within an inch of her life. It causes something in me to just snap; having had enough, I'm finally going to put an end to this once and for all.
"Enough Esme, I've had enough, I don't…" before I can say another word, my cell phone starts to vibrate in my pocket while simultaneously playing the theme music to ER; alerting me that the hospital is calling. Jasper gives me a curious look as I swiftly pull out my phone and swipe it to accept the call.
"Doctor Cullen." I answer a little too curtly, still irritated with Esme.
"Doctor Cullen, we've got mass casualties in-route from a three car MVA, two green tags, three yellow, two reds and a possible CTD. ETA is ten-minutes." Connie reports urgently, in what sounds like one breath.
"I'm on my way." I reply and end the call.
Esme's face contorts into a malcontent pout, making me wonder if she was even paying attention a moment ago when I was on the verge of telling her to leave me the fuck alone, permanently. Figuring there's no time to deal with her shit right now; I quickly turn looking for Bella and finally spot her talking to Jake and Leah about twenty feet away.
"Isabella!" I holler and thankfully catch her attention; she swiftly twists around looking for me. I wave my phone at her and with my other hand I sign an E than an R, and then sign stat. She quickly nods her head, turns back around saying something to Jake and Leah, and then sprints over to me.
"You know sign language?" Jasper asks looking impressed.
"Yes, Bella and I took a course many years ago, comes in handy at times." I reply and Esme huffs annoyingly at the mention of Bella's name.
"What's up, doc?" Bella inquires, her expression turning worrisome.
Esme chuffs and glares at Bella and then tries to get closer to me, which irritates all three of us simultaneously. Bella glares right back and it looks like Jasper's on the verge of helping Bella end Esme. A twisted part of me can't help loving this possessive side of him.
Ignoring Esme's antics and the rest as time is of the essence, I relay my phone call, "I just got called in, a three car MVA, mass casualties' in-route, two greens, three yellows, two reds with a possible CTD, ETA about eight-minutes now. From the sound of everything we'll need all hands on deck."
"Let's go, I'll ride in with you and give Charlie a call in-route, that's if he doesn't already know by now." Bella replies anxiously.
"I'll meet y'all there just incase there's any need for psych, or if ya have any crashers." Jasper says supportively.
As we all go to turn around to leave, I notice Esme looks like she just ate a bunch of sour grapes. Without so much as a goodbye, the three of us start sprinting towards the parking lot; Bella and I heading towards my car, and Jasper his.
Driving as fast as I dare on the way to the hospital, Bella talks to Charlie, filling him in on what's going on and telling him not to expect her home anytime soon. He understands and tells her he's already at the scene of the accident, informing her it's the worst he's seen since he joined the force.
This isn't how I envisioned this night ending.
~o0o~
As we swiftly enter the emergency department, we find it resembling pandemonium. It's very rare to see Forks Community this hectically under staffed with an overwhelming influx of patients. It can be alarming when it happens in a large city hospital and downright perilous in a small hospital like ours; this went beyond worse case scenario.
"Shit, he's coding, we're losing him."
"Charge to three-sixty."
"Clear!"
~o0o~
After eight hours of grueling back-to-back surgeries, having one of my patients code on the operating table, that I wasn't able to save, and still have two other precious lives hanging in the balance; I regrettably have to agree with Charlie, this has been one of the worst motor vehicle collisions we've had since I've been back in Forks. All because of one inexcusably bad decision, to drive while intoxicated.
I lethargically enter the men's locker room; disposing my bloody surgical gown and scrubs, I quickly clean up and change into another clean pair of scrubs and head right back out the door; dreading what I'm about to do.
Next I make my way to the surgical waiting room, finding the heart sicken Greene family huddled together. With a tremendous remorse, I give the devastating news to the distraught parents; sadly informing them of their oldest son, Max's passing and barely able to reassure them that their other son, Jason is in critical but stable condition. I give them my deepest condolences and tell them they can see Jason after he's out of post-op. I can't even begin to imagine losing one son and still have to worry the other might not pull through; that is a pain I wouldn't wish upon anyone.
I then turn to the terrified looking single mother, Maria and inform her that her daughter, Lucy might not even make it through the day. Hopefully, if we can get her in stable enough condition, she'll be sent to Seattle via helicopter for more intense care. I then ask one of the surgical nurses to help Maria to her daughter's room in our diminutive intensive care unit.
After tending to all the families and informing them of their loved ones, feeling like I've completely shattered some of their worlds, I realize I'm in desperate need of a cup of coffee if I want to continue with my duties and not fall flat on my face. It will be touch and go for a while until a few patients could be stabilized enough to be medevac to Seattle and at this point, it will be a long time before I'd get to see the inside of the on-call room for some much needed sleep.
With a heavy heart, I slowly amble down the corridor heading for the staff lounge. I push open the door and overhear Bella asking, "Oh, really? Then what's the strangest request you've even been asked to do?"
Following the sound of her voice, I look over to the far table and see Jasper and Bella sitting at opposite sides with their hands wrapped around coffee mugs; neither of them seem to notice my arrival.
"Umm, that would have to be when my high school boyfriend asked me to give him a blowjob with a mouth full of strawberry flavored Pop Rocks." Jasper answers mirthfully.
With a shock, twisted and almost awed expression, Bella's breath hitches. "You mean that snapping, popping candy that dissolves in your mouth?" I see Jasper nod his head in confirmation. "Oh my, that's just many levels of wrong." she giggles mirthfully. "Well unless he really got off on pain or something as I can't see how that wouldn't hurt like a son-of-a-bitch. Don't get me wrong, I'm into kink and all, but damn."
Jasper just laughs and shrugs, "Well he certainly got off, that's for sure."
Bella heartedly laughs, "Talk about 'Taste the Explosion'." Bella grins and poorly waggles her eyebrows as they both break out into raucous laughter.
"What the heck are you two talking about?" I ask making myself known as I step further into the lounge.
Bella's head snaps up and Jasper spins around in his seat, both sets of eyes wide and then they both break out into more fits of laughter.
Shaking my head at the absurdity of their conversation, I involuntarily join in on their laughter and head straight over to the coffee pot to pour me a cup, adding a heavy splash of my creamer.
Stifling a yawn, I take my mug and sit down next to Jasper, just needing to be close to him.
"How'd everything go? Did Max Greene make it?" Bella asks hopefully.
I sadly shake my head, "No, his injuries were far too severe… I tried my damnedest, but in the end, there was nothing I could do, he was too far gone." I reply sorrowfully, hating that I couldn't save the young man's life.
Jasper and Bella both utter words of comfort and reassurance. Between sips of coffee, I fill them in on our remaining patients and they do the same. It's almost hard to imagine all the devastation in just a short amount of time.
"Ah, fuck a duck," Jasper exclaims in a drawn out yawn. "Damn, it's been a long ass night, or fuck, mornin' and it's only gonna get longer. I best get off my ass and get to work, I'll stop by the waiting room first and check in on the Greene family and express my sympathy. I'll see if there's anything I can do, and offer them grief counseling and any other help I can offer with their other son."
"I think they'd appreciate that. I best be getting back to, I need to check in on Lucy." I concur and finish off the last of my coffee; praying the caffeine will keep me alert long enough.
"Okay, boys, let's get back to it then. Here's hoping the rest of the day stays uneventful." Bella states hopefully.
We all get up from around the table simultaneously, sharing matching expressions of sorrowfulness.
Bella gives me a tight hug and then shoves Jasper at me; she then walks swiftly over to the door and stands right in front of it; blocking anyone from entering the lounge.
I send Bella a grateful smile and warp Jasper up in my embrace. Staring into his soulful eyes, I lean in gentle caressing my lips with his, sharing a tender kiss. I pull back slightly, resting my forehead against his, as we murmur words of love to each other.
Surrounded by his embrace, I think back over the past twenty-four-hours; this whole ordeal has made me even more grateful to have them. I'm not sure what I'd do if I were to ever lose Jasper, he's already so ingrained into my very existence, even though we've only been together for such a short amount of time; I can no longer imagine him not being in my life.
Life is too delicate, you never know what may come; one second you're living, the next you're gone. Why this time stood out from all the others, I'm not sure. It's not like I haven't lost a patient before, though for some reason this day shifted something inside of me, putting things more into perspective; life really is short and unbelievably unpredictable and every second of it is too precious to waste. So, it all comes down to… How much more time am I willing to waste?
~o0o~
A/N: Hope y'all enjoyed the chapter, another long one, though figured y'all would rather have it this way than broken up into two parts. This chapter was a bit hard on poor Carlisle, though it got him to start rethinking things. Thank you all for your wonderful reviews, favs and follows, they all mean more to me then mere words can express and I truly appreciate them all. Until next Friday, I hope y'all have a most wonderful week.
Crasher: [Slang] A person who passes out in the ER, often not a patient but a family member who is upset over what's going on with a loved one.
Disaster Protocol Color Coding: The following color tags are used to immediately triage patients during a mass casualty event: Green is walking wounded; yellow is urgent; red is critical; black is DOA.
CTD: Circling The Drain. May also mean Certain To Die