I'm uploading this earlier than usual this week because I'm not going to be here for the weekend... I know some people feel like this fic is going slow and I feel like now is the time to warn you that it will continue to be this way. Again, Quinntana is endgame, but in this particular alternate universe, these are two women that have always considered themselves straight, so nothing is going to be as easy or as quick or maybe even as happy as it is on Glee. Thanks to those of you who have stuck with this story regardless of that. I am so, so committed to telling these characters' story and to trying to make it as honest and genuine as possible.

Santana always feels guilty after drinking, which is why she hardly ever does it. She can see herself, almost turning into her mother, and the thought of losing Jaeger, of ever having to leave Jaeger is so scary, it sets her straight. She's sort of upset with Sam, for letting her drink so much, for not keeping an eye on her the way he said he would when they made the commitment to stay together all those years ago. But he doesn't bring it up, and neither does she.

When they get to the hotel room, Jaeger is already asleep, taking up the bed from side to side and half-covered in blankets because the AC in the room is turned so high up. She glances at Sam and they shrug, neither willing to move their son. Sam grabs a bunch of pillows, sheets and towels from the closet and lays them on the floor instead; their own makeshift bed. They lay down with their backs to each other and Santana sighs heavily.

"You have fun?"

"No."

"First time I've ever seen you dance."

"Not true. I danced with Finn at the gala."

"Yeah, but this was different."

She can't deny it, so she's just silent.

"You think you'll remember any of it tomorrow?"

So he remembers how it is then, how the last times she got drunk, before Jaeger, she lost entire hours, entire nights, everything.

"I hope not."

Sam nods. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have-"

"It's fine, Sam. Like you said, it'll all be gone in the morning."

So she tries to stay awake as long as possible, she'd do it forever if she could, just to make sure she'd remember.

Quinn has no problem remembering, though that's in itself a problem, when one has so many things that need to be put away. So that she does, each and every time, memories tucked into little compartments not to be opened again. She had hoped this wouldn't be the case with last night, she had hoped that the alcohol would put everything to rest, but when she wakes up, at sunrise, she finds the memories still there, jabbing at her sharply. She sits up,hugs her legs to her chest, takes a deep breath and closes her eyes. I will not think about this again, I will not think about this again, I will not think about it again.

Finn gets up while she's at it, but she's so focused she doesn't even notice, and he stares at her, wondering what she's up to now. He never seems to know what his wife is thinking, but she's got such an intense, focused look on her little face, that he can only guess what it must be that she's willing away. He kisses her furrowed brow and Quinn opens her eyes, startled.

"You all right?"

"Yeah. I was just-"

"It's fine," he says with a small smile. "I know."

"You do?" She looks into her husband's eyes, surprised. She finds traces of the old pain still there and realizes, with a pang, that there is no way he would know, that she has a new one now.

"Jaeger? Jaeger? Where are you?"
She feels like she's had this nightmare before, probably because of her son's propensity for getting lost, and in her still hazy mind, she's blaming it all on her drinking. By the time she woke up, Jaeger was already long gone. She looked for him in the pool and by the lobby, but he was nowhere to be found. She's not worried yet, hasn't even woken up Sam; Jaeger has so many friends amongst the team's children that he could be in any of their rooms, although she suspects she will have to check Elliott's first.

Whatever it was that happened with Quinn last night is still fuzzy in her head, but she knows there must be a reason she's so reluctant about knocking on that particular door. As a matter of fact, the only thing that would make her do it is exactly the reason she's doing it: Jaeger.

She makes her way down the hall and, taking a deep breath, knocks on the door. She hears a crash from within and then the door opens a little bit and Elliott peeks out, looking visibly relieved.

"Oh, it's just you."

He opens the door wider and she steps inside. "Are you looking for my mom?"

"Uh, no, actually. Are you alone?"

"Yeah."

"Where is everybody?"

"They went out for ice cream after dinner."

"Jesus, what time is it?"

"Like seven."

Santana brings a hand to her forehead. "I slept the whole day. And now I can't find Jaeger."

"He's over at the Lawrenson's. They're playing videogames."

Santana is about to ask why Elliott's not with them when she spots a toy oven and some dishes swept hastily under the bed.

"Those yours?"

He tenses up immediately and shuts the door behind her. "Of course not. They're Daisy's. Boys don't have ovens."

Santana laughs. "I'm sure there's some that do."

Elliott frowns at her. "Like who?"

"I don't know. Those that want to be chefs or something. Or maybe they just like them."

"I don't wanna be a chef."

"So you just like ovens, then?"

Elliott shrugs. "I guess."

Santana nods and heads for the door. "I'm gonna go look for Jaeger. I'll see you later."

"Santana, I mean, Mrs. Evans-"

"Santana's fine."

Elliott blushes, but looks up at her determinedly. "Please don't tell my mom."

"Tell her what?"

"That you saw me playing with... she doesn't like for me to play with Daisy's toys."

"Is she afraid you'll break them?"

"No. She says they're for girls."

"Oh."

Elliott is looking down at the floor and Santana feels angry with Quinn, suddenly.

"You know, there aren't really things for boys and things for girls, Elliott."

"My mom says there are."

"Well, some people think so, but... has Jaeger told you he dances ballet?"

Elliott looks so surprised Santana thinks he might topple over. "He does?"

"Yeah. He's in one of your mom's classes, actually."

"Really? She never mentioned it."

"Yeah, I figured."

"Won't Jaeger be mad that you told me?"

"I don't think so. I'm surprised he didn't tell you himself. You can ask him about it, if you want."

"Ewww, no. I hate ballet."

Santana laughs and glances at the little cupcakes still in the oven. "Any chance you'll share?"

"You really wanna try them? My sisters never want to. I always end up eating everything myself."

Santana shrugs. "I haven't eaten a thing all day."

They sit on the floor, across from each other. Elliott carefully places two cupcakes on a plate for Santana and watches her eat.

"Y'all came back pretty late, didn't you?"

"Yeah. How did you know?"

"Oh, I can't sleep when my parents are away."

He thinks he might have overshared, but Santana is nodding as if this made perfect sense. She's about to ask for another cupcake when they hear footsteps coming down the hall and a knock on the door. Elliott tries to put everything away quickly, but Santana shakes her head and whispers. "It's OK, I got it."

The knocking becomes more insistent, and finally, she gets up and opens the door.

Quinn wonders if thinking and thinking about something can cause you to conjure it up. Out of thin air, apparently, because now Santana's here, in her own room, like a fantasy she didn't know she had, of opening doors and finding her there, always.

"What are you doing here?"

Santana looks startled at her tone of voice. "I was-"

But Quinn's already pushing past her and into the room, where the oven are dishes are scattered about the floor. "What is all this?"
Santana feels immediately defensive of Elliott, and she steps in front of him protectively. "I came looking for Jaeger and then I saw Daisy's oven and I asked Elliott if I could use it to make something. I didn't think you'd be back so soon."

Quinn is looking back and forth between her and Elliott suspiciously, and Santana breaks the silence. "Oh, come on. I never had one as a child, OK? Is it that weird that I'd want to use it?"

Quinn shrugs. "I don't know."

"Did you have one when you were little?"

"I had everything I wanted when I was little."

"I bet you still do."

Quinn turns to Elliott sharply. "Elliott, please pick up all of that stuff and leave us alone for a bit. And shut the door behind you."

He nods, knowing better than to argue, and dumps everything into the nearest empty suitcase. He shoots Santana a grateful glance before exiting. Santana fixes her eyes on Quinn.

"What's wrong?"

"That you're exactly the person I didn't want to see, and I come and find you in my room."

She doesn't realize what she's saying until it's out, but even as it is, she finds it to be unequivocally true, even if she's not sure why. Seeing Santana makes her feel unsettled in a way she hasn't felt in years, and she doesn't welcome the reminder.

"Quinn, look, I... I'm not a good a drinker, so, whatever I did last night, I apologize."

Quinn's eyes, liquid and slippery, are wide on her. "You mean you don't remember?"

"I remember we were drinking together and talking, and..."

Quinn almost feels like stomping her foot on the ground, the way Daisy does when she's upset. "It's not fair."

"What isn't?"

That you can't remember and I can't forget. "Nothing."

"Jesus, the way you're acting, I wish I remembered."

"I wish you did, too." But it's not true, because even if she could remember, it wouldn't make any difference.

"Any chance you'll tell me?"

"No."

"I... always forget things. After I drink."

"Lucky you."

Finn offers Quinn the aisle seat on the plane this time, but she she declines as soon as she sees Santana having a seat right across from them. Santana tries to pretend she didn't notice what just happened, and smiles at Finn when he finally sits down, after making sure all the children and his wife are strapped in and comfortable, Quinn in the farthest seat possible, wearing earplugs and a sleeping mask.

"Never a moment's rest, huh?"

He laughs. "Nope. I've been up since five."

"You go running today?"

"Yeah. Didn't see you out there."

Santana shakes her head. "I overslept. It's the first day in years I don't go out running."

Finn nods. "Yeah, I can tell. You're very good. You ever think about competing?"

"I've been in a couple of marathons here and there. There's one coming up, actually."

"The one for the university?"
"Yeah. You going?"

"I wasn't thinking about it, but if you're going, it might be fun."

"I can sign you up, if you want."

Finn nods. "Yeah, sure. Count me in."

And just like that, they're back home, and everything's back to normal, and Quinn can hardly believe it. The turmoil she's felt the past couple of days feels like it might finally begin to settle, because at home, her mundane life takes care of erasing any feeling out of the ordinary, like that nervous beating in her chest that she had begun to think was becoming part of her.

She feels almost like she needs another vacation to recover from the emotional exhaustion from this one, and she tells Finn as much. He laughs; for him there's no vacation, he has training from nine to nine, and Willow and Elliott have to go back to school. She spends the whole day in bed with Daisy, switching the TV channels repeatedly, from one nondescript reality show to the next, and then Dora the Explorer, until she falls asleep.

It's late afternoon when Daisy wakes her for ballet class. Elliott and Willow are already home and there's a pouring thunderstorm outside. Quinn sighs. It's no longer time, to ask Puck to come and get them; her parents' house is too far away, so she phones her husband instead.

"Finn?"

"Yeah. What's wrong?"

"Well, it's raining pretty hard here, and Daisy and I can't walk to ballet and it's too late to call Puck."

"OK?"

"So I was wondering if you could give us a ride?"

"We're in the middle of training, Quinn. I can't just get up and leave."

"Oh. OK. It's just that I didn't want to have to call and cancel, you know how Daisy gets."

"Why don't you ask Willow to take you?"

Willow's been driving herself and her brother to and from school now, which has been a big relief, because it eases the pressure off Finn, and Puck, too, because he had to drive them when Finn was away.

Quinn wonders why she didn't think of asking her, and maybe the thought did cross her mind, but she must have set it aside immediately. She's never even been in the car with her daughter ever since Willow learned how to drive.

"Quinn?"

"Yeah?"

"I bought that car for you, you know."

"I don't think she realizes that."

"She's your daughter. I don't think she's going to refuse you a favor."

"If it's my car, then it's not really asking for a favor, is it? Only she'll think it is."

She can hear Finn's heavy sigh on the other end of the line. "I'll ask her, if you want. Let me talk to her."

"No. Call her cell phone. Otherwise she'll think I put you up to it."

He sighs again. "Fine, Quinn. Have a good time in class."

"Mom?"

"Yeah?" Santana quickly shuts the biology book she was perusing as she hears Jaeger come into the kitchen.

"You know I have ballet today, right?"

"Yeah, so?"

"Dad's out training, remember? He can't take me."

"Shit."

"What?"

"Nothing, I just... I'd forgotten. Do you have to go?"

Jaeger frowns. "I don't have to. But you haven't been to any of my classes here, I thought you'd want to come."

Santana gets up. "You're right. I'm being stupid. Let's go."

"You could have asked me yourself, you know. Did you think I was gonna say no?"

They're driving to class, and they're already late, and Willow's attitude is not improving Quinn's general mood.

"You make it sound like I'm scared of you."

"Are you? Ms. Jones used to think you were. Is that why you had her fired?"

"You really think I'm important enough to get someone fired at my beck and call?"

"No. But the PTA is, and we all know what a big-shot you are there."

"That's enough, Willow. You should be grateful you have a mother who is involved-"

"Yeah, well, I'm not."

Willow drives entirely too fast for her taste, but Quinn feels like saying something would be pushing her luck. The car brakes abruptly into a parking spot right in front of the community center. Quinn reaches into the back seat for her stuff, where Daisy's fast asleep.

"Daisy, come on, we're late. We gotta go."

She tries shaking her, but Daisy won't wake up, and finally, Willow sighs. "Go. I'll wake her and meet you inside."

Quinn nods and rushes off.

Inside the classroom, all her students are warming up. At the door, she runs into Santana. She feels her stomach flip, and, trying to ignore it, sits down on the hardwood floor to tie her slippers on. Santana clears her throat and Quinn has no choice but to acknowledge her, without looking up.

"Must I run into you everywhere I go?"

Santana moves in closer to her, just as Quinn is getting up.

"You think I showed up just to see you, don't you? Well, I didn't. I've seen everything there is to see, remember?"

Quinn flushes.

"I came to see my son dance, I hope that's OK with you."

"I don't seem to be able to stop you."

Santana sighs. "I don't know how many times you want me to apologize for something I can't even remember doing... I've actually thought about asking Finn what was."

"Finn doesn't know anything about this."

"I mean, I asked Sam about that night, and he said we were dancing, and then you ran out."

"I had a headache."

"And I suppose that was my fault?"

"I never said-"

Quinn hadn't become aware of just how close they were standing to each other, of how the rest of the world had seemed to dim and lose its color until Willow comes and stands next to them, dragging Daisy by the hand.

"What's going on?"

Quinn's so startled she nearly jumps out of her skin. "What?"

"What were you guys talking about?"

Santana turns to look at Willow. "Not that it's any of your business, but we were talking about my son."

If any other person had talked to her daughter the way Santana just did, Quinn knows she would have jumped at their throat. Willow knows this too, knows that even though they don't get along, her mother is always on her side. Except that this time, for some reason, she's quiet, and her mother is hardly ever quiet. Quinn's thankful that the nature of their relationship won't allow Willow to ever bring this up, for fear it will look like she actually cares.

She feels relief at Santana's response until she realizes that the fact that she lied means there's something to hide, and that they're in it together now, sharing something. And Quinn, who thought Santana Lopez would be the last person in the world she would ever share something with, is finding out she doesn't mind it at all.