Chapter Twelve – Broken Doorbell

At Max's feet lay three deep holes in the earth. The grass under her shoes seemed so green and lively as the caskets of the dead sat buried six feet under. The vibrant green contrasted to the darkness of the soil and the deep orifice that waited to be filled with her family. The fridge wind blew through the hair and caused a shiver to shoot through her spine. As she inhaled in response, the cold air filled her lungs with a killer pain. She hadn't been so afraid of the winter since the escape.

"God of love, we thank you that Thelonious, Jacinda, and little baby Omar is in your gentle and loving hands, far away from the cruelty, violence and pain of our world. When the trouble was near, we could not understand how you seemed to remain far away."

The words of the Father seemed so rich and powerful. She wanted to turn everything off like a switch. Max expect the numbness to remain, she even welcomed it. Discovering their murdered bodies stretched out in the blood soaked carpet put her into a warm shell of denial where not even the winter could touch her. It faded so quickly when reality began to set in. Now, everything seemed so deep and rich. The sounds hurt her ears, the colors too bright for her eyes, and even the sense of touch brought the memory of pain and torture.

"And yet it is to you we turn, for in life and death, it is you alone whom we can trust and yours alone is the love that holds us fast."

Her eyes ripped from the three caskets and saw Logan's hand holding her close to his body. He hadn't left her alone since that night. As her eyes searched the crowd, she could see a few concerned eyes staring at her. The General even seemed somewhat sympathetic and mournful for her loss. Yet, through the public exposure, Logan pulled her close to him without fear. Turning her head up, she saw the grim look on his face as his eyes set sight on the smallest casket.

"We find it hard to forgive the deed that has brought us so much grief. But we know that, if life is soured by bitterness, an unforgiving spirit brings no peace."

Max closed her eyes and imagined the murder in her head. She imagined Theo jumping over to protect his wife and unborn son. She could hear the screams as Trish was gutted like a fish. Just as Max began to forgive the demons inside of her, she had another one to fight against.

Max just wanted to give up and surrender.

"Lord, save us and help us. Strengthen in us the faith and hope that Thelonious, Jacinda, and Omar Guevara are eternally freedom. Let us pray for the daughter they left behind and the Lord's guidance over her life. Lord, let her rest forever in the power of your forgiveness and security of your love. In Jesus, we pray."

Max caught the sob that would have escaped before Logan turned her from the caskets and directed her to the car. Max could feel the soft earth under her shoes as the black crepe chiffon brushed against her thighs step after step. Kendra had given her the dress to wear, even if she should have turned up her nose and vowed never to wear a dress, she couldn't find the effort not to. Logan had told her she looked lovely, but it was in all hope of making the day easier.

Logan opened the car door and offered a hand for Max to help. When she took it, he gave her hand a tight squeeze before she sat in the passenger side and shut the door. He watched as the General stepped carelessly through the mud towards him. With his face, the general tried to remain stoic, but Logan could see the regret over his face.

"How is she, Cale?"

Logan assumed she could be better, but comparing the brutality of the past few days, she was doing surprisingly well. "She'll survive."

The General nodded. "She's a tough girl. She'll make it through."

Logan could see the plain concern written over his face. Logan felt surprised that he cared so much for her, but it wasn't surprising. Logan had known her for a short time compared to him, and he was utterly head over heels. He could imagine that the military side of him had found something familiar in Max and had the natural drive to be concerned about her.

"I don't want her fall behind the other students." He said sharply.

"I'll bring her work home to her." Logan promised with a nod.

"She's alright staying with you?" He questioned, wondering if it was slightly awkward or inappropriate. "But a rich kid like you probably can support her."

Logan blinked. "I have an guest room, if that's what you mean."

Narrowing his eyes, he looked at the younger man and nearly gave Logan a heart attack with his stare. "Max is a very special girl, Mr. Cale. I will not be pleased if you stand in her way. I will not allow you to enable her neglect to her school work."

His eyes remained on the man, slightly terrified from his words. Being in agreement, it didn't take much to regain his composure and replied, "Max will never be held back by anyone. Her stubbornness is proof of that."

The General had to suppress the smile that was slowly appearing on his thin lips. He took one good at the traumatized girl in the car before returning to his own. Logan turned and walked over to the driver side. Slipping inside the car, he gave one look at Max before turning the key in the ignition. She had remained vapid and unsure of her movements. It wasn't like anything he ever seen in her. But even his parent's death had caused some damage.

"I don't want to your apartment." She told him as he took the stick out of park and into drive.

Logan narrowed his eyes. He automatically recalled the luncheon. Was she going to forget the people that were to shortly arrive at their apartment? After all, she was the only intimate relative to Theo and Jacinda left.

"I just see them. I can't let anyone tell me one more sorry." Max turned her head over her shoulders and pleaded with Logan. "Can we go somewhere…just you and I."

He agreed, having no idea where they both could go.

Instead, they just drove.

When they would arrive at the mess hall, the trays would already be set out for them. Contact with anyone else but their TAC leaders and authorized superiors were strictly prohibited. They would come to the lunchroom, rows of two, and sit in unison. There would be no talking as they ate, but at times, the two youngest would send morose codes on their palms discreetly under the table. The food wasn't anything special, selectively picked for their growing bodies and activity needs.

But, there were times under scientific observation they were given absolutely nothing to eat.

It was a week before they all began to fall like flies.

And it had been a week since Max put anything in her mouth. Maybe she could make Lydecker proud and see if she could go longer than a week. She probably could, it wouldn't be that hard.

But Logan wasn't going to let her.

The cold of the freezer hit his chest hard as he opened the door. He took a look at the cartons of ice cream that were surprisingly filling the freezer. He had checked the convince store a few days before and the fridge was hardly stocked. Now he had the choice from vanilla and chocolate. Not letting the opportunity pass by, he grabbed two cartons and brought it up to the cash register.

"35.50 please." The teenager replied as she turned the page of her magazine.

Logan's mouth hung open. "For two cartons of ice cream?"

She shrugged. Money didn't matter. It wasn't for him anyway. He put down a fifty and waited for her to give him back his change and put the chocolate ice cream into a paper bag. Moving towards the door, he aimed to bring Max out of reverie.

Making it to the door of his apartment, he switched the ice cream to the other hand after he began to loose feeling from the cold. When he got his keys ready for the door, two colorful teenagers waiting at the door stopped him.

"Maybe the doorbells broken." The blonde's raspy voice hit a familiar string as her knuckles knocked at the door with a powerful clack at the wood.

"Doorbell's not broken." Logan told them. The two snapped around and saw the faces of two of his students. "Max is just ignoring the door."

Kendra and Sketchy looked at each other before Logan went to unlock his door. He didn't even want to find out how two of his students found out where he lived. If two teenagers could, than Seattle police could in a heartbeat, or even worse, Manticore.

"Do you think it would be possible to see Max, Mr. Cale?" Kendra asked concerning. Sketchy's face even showed a great amount of sadness at his best friend's loss.

"I really wish I could, but Max doesn't want to talk to anyone." Logan told them as he inserted his keys into the door.

"When do you listen to what Max says?" Sketchy questioned softly.

Logan smiled amused, but if it didn't matter, he would have let the pair in. "You two know how Max is. Give her a little time and before you know it, she'll be visiting you."

Logan turned the doorknob and didn't open the door too far before stepped through.

"C'mon, Mr. Cale." Kendra pleaded.

"This isn't the best time right now. I'll tell you when she's ready to see guest in class." Logan closed the door with a painful breath before he turned to the kitchen. Putting the ice cream in the freezer, he took out some of chicken below to thaw for tomorrow's dinner. He had been preparing non-stop culinary miracles in hope to lift her spirits. But every meal was in hope to lift her spirits. Max hadn't even stepped one foot from the bed.

Logan went towards the guest room and slid the door open. Max was lying on her stomach, sleeping, just how he left her when he went to school that morning. Logan moved to the nightstand and saw the breakfast he put out on the tray untouched and souring. Logan shook his head, disapproving. She was going to start wasting away if she didn't eat something.

It was such a rare, sunny day. And what was she doing? Sleeping.

Logan pressed his lips together as he went over to the window and parted the curtains, bringing in the bright sun to the burgundy walls.

He turned when she heard her moan and brought her hand up to shield her eyes from the penetrating light. She muttered something along the lines of 'leave me alone' before she buried her head in the pillow.

Such a pathetic attempt for a trained soldier, Logan assumed. If she wanted him gone, he would be on his butt, twenty stories below.

"Max, it's three in the afternoon."

The better part of him told him to stay away from her. He had always known she was a genetically engineered killing machine, but it never really hit him, he never fully realized what the animal inside of her really could do. How could he have been so naïve and foolish? How could he not see who Max really was.

Then the ignorant side of Logan told him that Max really was a scared, abused little girl. A beautiful woman who would soon find her way, it was only a matter of time.

Max was a woman that he loved unconditionally.

He put his knee onto the bed and Max felt the bed dip slightly as he crawled over the sheets. Her round eyes closed tight as knew he was moving towards her. Logan rested on his side before reaching out and pulling her silky black hair away from her neck. His fingers traced the thick lines of the barcode she had been born with. He had never been so transfixed by anything before. It didn't even seem like a tattoo but a dark birthmark that would never fade. All of his curiosity was consumed by it. He wanted to know more.

But the more he learned, the more frightened he had become.

"Logan…" It came out as a tired sigh, but it was enough for her to turn on her back. He admired her in the bed, how she looked so angelic against the white sheets. He secretly wished she wore brighter colors than the blacks and grays she did. Not all of her was so dark.

Logan's hand came to his side to hold him over her as she gave a huge yawn.

"I thought you didn't sleep."

Max's lip twitched. "I don't." She visibly gave it some thought before she replied, "I must be able to train my body to sleep if I choose." Max inhaled and put her hand over her forehead. She never felt so fatigued in her life. Her body felt so heavy and lifeless, she couldn't imagine putting her feet on the floor in an attempt to stand.

"You should eat something." Logan told her, looking at her with concerned eyes.

"I'm not hungry."

Logan closed his eyes. "You haven't even touched your school work."

"Do you expect me to?" Max shot back annoyingly.

Logan closed his eyes in frustration. Taking Max's hand in his own, his fingers slide between hers. He couldn't find a way to stop himself from bringing her hand up to his mouth to kiss. Her skin was so delicate and small in his. Logan was just overcome by her perfection. Overcome by love.

Her skin was so cold under his lips, but she knew he could warm them up in her palms. Just if Logan could keep them in her stay a little more, he could convince Max she was everything she could be. That she could be that woman inside he fell in love with on that indefinite night.

Max's hand tingled with electricity as he honestly kissed the backside of her palm. She couldn't let him. All he wanted to do at that moment was take her out of her darkness and show her the light. And, all she wanted to do was to remain in that darkness. It was everything she had ever known in her life.

Stomaching her real desires, Max pulled her hand from his.

"We can't Logan."

Max immediately shut her eyes, begging herself not to cry. It was so difficult. The burning impulse to put her head in his lap and ask him if he would love her like a father, protect her like her brother, and love her like a husband was ignored with agony.

Logan tried to reach out for her again. "I-"

Was he going to say he loved her? Max reaction time was twice, maybe triple the amount of time of a human. So when she knew instinctively he was going to tell her that he loved her, she needed to shut the door permanently.

"Get out."

Logan shook his head. He didn't want her to take it that way, but how else was she going to react? "Max, I—"

"Get out, Logan." She interrupted him with her crisp voice. If he asked one more time, that voice would come cracked and emotion. She prayed he wouldn't.

Max felt the weight shift off the bed and mentally cursed him for not fighting for her. She didn't want anything to do with someone who wasn't going to fight tooth and nail for her. Couldn't he see that she wanted him to stay? Max could imagine him reaching out to her, bringing her body into the warm embrace the once shared, and whispering how beautiful she was in her ear.

But she denied him. She had to. Heartache was the one natural thing she knew.

God, if she need his love more than anything, it was then.

Big chapter, reviews matter. :D