Chapter 11

Earth-44

2030

Paradise Island

A large, comforting hand rubbed Diana's back. "That's it, sweetheart. You're doing fine. Everything will be fine."

Diana stopped counting how many times her husband had said those words to her. Clark was set on repeat, and he didn't seem to notice. They were words meant to reassure, to soothe, but they only served to remind Diana of her failure of sixteen years ago.

She closed her eyes, hating the memory and the gnawing pain of failure. Her companion for nearly two decades.

But she'd been given a second chance, her mind kept reminding her—a second chance to do what she'd failed to accomplish the first time. Diana regulated her breathing, the way Hessia had taught her during Diana's first pregnancy. In the intervening years, Diana hadn't forgotten, so she breathed slowly now, in through the nose and out through the mouth.

Hippolyta held Diana's left hand through each contraction, her breathing much faster than Diana's, blue eyes shadowed with the same fear and concern Diana glimpsed whenever she looked at Clark. In that moment, Diana wished she had the power to take away their hurt. She'd felt the same in the past, especially after she'd awoken to learn her son had died in childbirth. By the time she'd healed from the arduous birth, it had been days and Athos' infant body already laid to rest. It was then Diana noticed the change in the way her husband and mother looked at her, and how they looked at each other.

There was something unspoken between Clark and Hippolyta that hadn't existed prior to that fateful day. They had experienced Athos's death and Diana's near death together. Both had deeply shaken the pair, to the point of them being anxious and overly cautious when Diana learned of her second pregnancy.

After losing Athos, Diana sunk into a depression she thought herself too strong of character to succumb to, but she'd been wrong. Months, it had taken her months to pull herself from her emotional malaise. She'd stayed in Themyscira, wallowing in self-pity and guilt, pushing away all who wanted to help her, including her husband.

Clark couldn't help her, he only served to remind Diana of her failure to bring their child safely into this world. During those irrational days, weeks, and months, Diana had even hated Clark—hated him for coming to her bed when he was sick with the Doomsday virus, hated him for burying their child without her, hated him for loving her more than their dead baby, and hated him for kissing her on the Lincoln Memorial, forever twining their Fates.

She'd hated Clark as much as she'd loved him. It was that love, and Clark's persistence that helped Diana drive away the demons of her mind, heart, and soul. Yet some of the old demons remained, hissing in her ear that she didn't deserve this second chance at motherhood, that a child of an Amazon and Kryptonian was an abomination, a threat to humanity.

Most days Diana ignored the vile whispers that tried to eat away at her hopes and dreams. Today, this day when her child would either come screaming into this world with life and vigor or shatter into a thousand crystals of depleted sunshine, the demons' voices swam about the birthing room, wraiths ready to swoop in and devour what would be left of Diana if she lost another child.

At the sound of knocking, Diana opened her eyes.

With irritation, Hippolyta told Hessia's assistant to "See who dares to intrude on this moment. I told everyone we should not be disturbed."

"Diana is doing well, Hippolyta, no need to worry."

Diana gave Hessia a grateful smile. There were few Amazons her mother would listen to, thankfully, Hessia was one of them.

The door opened, and Diana heard low talking. She looked up at her husband, who had his eyes trained on Diana.

"What are they saying?"

"The queen has a visitor."

Before Clark could elaborate, the assistant returned.

"Your highness, Hephaestus has come for a visit."

Hippolyta frowned, her hand still laced with Diana's. "Tell him to return later. The princess is in labor. I'm sure he will understand."

"Yes, well, he was already told about Princess Diana's condition. But he says it's an emergency, and that he must speak with you or Superman immediately."

Hippolyta's grip grew tighter, a force that would've crushed the hand of a weaker person.

"Mother? What's wrong?"

All the color had drained from Hippolyta's face, as if she had seen the demons of Diana's nightmares. Then she glanced from Hessia to Clark. Something passed between the three of them—cold and unsettling.

"Tell me what's going on. What's so important that Hephaestus would seek out the Queen of the Amazons?" She lifted her gaze up to Clark again. "And what do you have to do with Hephaestus' emergency?"

"I have no idea why your brother is here."

Clark didn't lie often or even particularly well. But there was a lie somewhere in his answer. Clark may not have known why Hephaestus had come to Paradise Island, but Diana had no doubt Clark had an idea what his visit was about.

Hippolyta addressed Hessia's assistant. "Please have a guard ask Hera to see to her son. Whatever news the smith brings will have to wait until after my daughter has given birth."

"The same goes for me. I'm not leaving my wife."

Of course he wasn't, although Diana had been in labor a scant hour. Diana wasn't yet fully dilated, which meant her mother or husband could meet with Hephaestus and be back long before she gave birth.

She didn't bother with the suggestion, knowing both to be too stubborn to consider leaving her.

Mylena, Hessia's assistant, returned to the door and delivered the message to the guard.

The increased tension in the birthing room threatened to suffocate Diana, and it all came from Hippolyta, Clark, and Hessia.

"Whatever it is, I want to know."

All three opened their mouths then slammed them shut.

"It's nothing, sweetheart. You don't need any stress right now. Just focus on delivering our baby. I'll take care of everything else."

Diana didn't need Clark's reminder of her duty. She damn well knew, if not for her weakness, their son would've survived. He would be a teenager now—sixteen, in fact.

Clark was right, though, Diana didn't need the additional stress. But she also didn't appreciate that her mother and husband were lying to her, which wasn't like them at all.

Diana closed her eyes again and concentrated on the tiny life within. This pregnancy had been nothing like the first. Diana had gained weight instead of losing it, the way she had with Athos. She didn't awake with stomach cramps in the middle of the night or experience nausea throughout the day. Athos had taken so much from Diana, her pregnancy an ordeal that nearly killed her. In the end, however, it was Athos who'd died.

A child shouldn't suffer for the weakness of his mother. I won't make the same mistake twice.

Warm lips to her forehead had Diana opening her eyes. Hessia and Hippolyta were now deep in conversation on the other side of the room, leaving only Clark at her side.

He was so handsome, even staring at her with worried eyes.

"The baby will be fine."

"That's supposed to be my line." He swept a few unruly locks away from Diana's eyes. "I wasn't sure if you would ever want to try to have another child."

After Diana had emerged from her half-year of depression and mourning, Clark had taken her home to Metropolis. Physically, Diana was at one hundred percent a week after giving birth to Athos, but it had taken years before Diana would even consider becoming pregnant again.

"We're better for having waited. We grew up." They learned what it meant to be husband and wife. During those six months of near-isolation, Diana had contemplated letting Clark go. It would've been the easiest and most difficult thing in the world to do, ending their hasty marriage. Even after returning home with Clark, there were times Diana questioned whether they were making a mistake, playing the role of a family when the main reason for their marriage was dead and buried.

"We're stronger than his death, Diana. More than it, too. We always have been."

So he'd told her throughout the years.

"I know."

Clark kissed her forehead again. "Sometimes I don't think you do. Our love has to be enough. Please, Diana, let it be enough."

She didn't understand and wanted to ask Clark to explain. But she was hit by another contraction. He held her hands through it, their gazes locked, connected and disconnected in a way that sent foreboding shivers through her, more potent than the contraction wracking her body.

"I love you."

Clark said it as if it were a confession, a justification, and an apology, wrapped into one confusing declaration.

He said nothing more when Hessia and Hippolyta returned to Diana's side.

Hessia checked Diana's vitals and smiled. "You're doing wonderful. The little princess will be here before you know it."

Diana cut her eye at Clark, who only shrugged.

"Did you honestly think I could keep the gender a secret from these two?"

No, she didn't, but Mera, Selina, and Zola kept buying her pink, white, or yellow baby clothes and accessories, which meant the entire League knew Diana and Clark were having a girl.

"Are you in pain?" Hessia asked, her doctor's hands gentle as she examined Diana's round belly. "I have the crystals available, if you require relief."

"It's manageable. I think I'll be fine."

And she was, to everyone's relief.

Again, the second time around proved to be nothing like the first. Diana didn't pass out from the pain, nor did she bleed beyond what was normal for a natural birth. Through it all, Clark was there, rubbing her back and whispering words of encouragement and love in her ear.

In the end, they had a healthy baby girl, as pink-and-white as all those clothes Diana's friends had brought her.

Through exhausted eyes, Diana watched Clark hold their daughter. An aura of thankful joy shimmered about him, so bright it threatened to blind Diana.

"We have a daughter." As he'd done Diana many times tonight, Clark kissed their daughter's forehead. "Hessia said she's the picture of health. She's perfect, just perfect."

Their son hadn't been perfect or a picture of health, which was the reason he hadn't survived. Clark's comparison was unmistakable. But the life of one child could not make up for the life of another, no matter how wanted and loved the second child.

"Eyes, nose, mouth, and hair, she looks just like you, Diana. So beautiful. Our little girl is so beautiful."

She was the most precious sight Diana had ever beheld, next to seeing Clark hold his daughter in his arms, awe and love in his adoring eyes.

"So, what shall we call her? Last time I checked, our list was up to twenty names, and that doesn't include the suggestions from your mother and sisters."

Clark settled onto the bed beside Diana, their sleeping daughter, wrapped in a blanket, between them.

"I can't believe she's asleep. My mother said the only thing I did for the first forty-eight hours after my birth was cry, breastfeed, and cause mischief."

Clark laughed. "How could you have possibly caused mischief when you were a day old?"

"I have no idea, but my mother swears it's true."

Clark arched a perfect set of dark brows at Diana, his own eyes twinkling with mischief. "Well, I can attest to your naughty nature, Princess Diana. It had to begin somewhere."

"So says the man who pulled me into every closet and alcove on the Watchtower."

"I didn't hear you complaining."

"How could I when your tongue was buried down my throat."

A kiss to her nose. "Like I said, I didn't hear you complaining. Anyway, let's name our daughter before she awakens and begins her mischief."

They laid in silence for several minutes, thinking on the perfect name for their perfect baby girl.

"What about Astra Lara-El."

To her surprise, Clark shook his head in vehement disapproval. "She's nothing like Athos."

The hardness in his tone also surprised Diana. She didn't understand.

"Astra means star. I thought it a fitting name, because she's our little star."

"It's a lovely name, Diana, truly it is. But I don't think you should pick a name that will remind you of the child we lost. If you don't mind, I would rather not name our daughter Astra, or any name close to that of Athos."

The gnawing foreboding was back, throbbing and aching and ruining what should be a wonderful moment between the two of them.

"Then you select."

He smiled. "I will. What about Eleodora Lara-El? We could call her Dora for short, if you like."

"You're absolutely amazing. Out of all the Greek names you researched, I should've known you would find one that has to do with the sun."

Clark's smile widened into a full-on grin. "'She who came from the sun.' It's perfect, like her. So, what do you think?"

Diana ran the name over in her mind, comparing it to her selection. She liked the name Eleodora well enough, though she still preferred Astra.

"I'm not sure, Clark. Sorry."

"Oh, well, okay. I guess I can get our list and we can start from there."

They didn't need the list. Diana and Clark knew it by heart, so many times had they added and omitted names, over the last few months. They were out of sync, disagreeing without being openly disagreeable. This wasn't like them. At least it hadn't been since the early years of their marriage.

For long minutes, they said nothing, each nursing their private thoughts, the sleeping child not the one that was truly between them. No, that would be Athos, the baby whose name it had taken them only minutes to agree upon.

"Katlyn Kal-El?" Diana suggested into the oppressive silence.

"Philomena?" was Clark's counter.

They rejected each other's suggestion and drifted into another bout of uncomfortable silence.

Diana closed her eyes, exhausted and frustrated. Their daughter needed a name. Why in Hades was it so hard for them to agree upon one?

When Diana awoke, it was to a crying and hungry daughter.

And Clark was nowhere to be found.

Clark entered the throne room, knowing, without having to be told, where Hippolyta, Hera, and Hessia were. Closing the tall, marble doors behind him, Clark took in the assembled group. Indeed, the three women were there, along with Hephaestus.

They sat around a rectangular table, the queen at the head, Hephaestus to her immediate right and the others to her left. The grim faces told the story Clark dreaded since hearing of the god's arrival.

Sixteen years. Had it only been sixteen years? Clark thought he would have longer, although he knew this day would come. How could it not? Secrets, even among gods, didn't stay hidden forever.

"How are Diana and the baby?" The queen asked.

When it came to Diana's happiness and safety, Clark and Hippolyta were of one accord. The queen was an unexpected and welcomed ally. Without her, Clark could've so easily lost Diana. When Diana had refused to return to Metropolis with Clark, choosing to stay on Paradise Island, Clark thought Hippolyta would use their separation to turn Diana against him.

But she hadn't. She loved Diana more than she despised the way they had come to be man and wife. Or perhaps she thought, with time, Diana would come to see her marriage and Clark as a horrible mistake in need of rectifying.

Although she had never admitted it to him, no more than Clark had ever dared ask, Clark knew Diana had given serious thought to ending their marriage. In truth, he didn't blame her. The pregnancy and everything afterward had been his doing. She almost died because of him and had fallen into such a wretched state of depression that it burned at Clark's heart to see his strong Amazon turn into a shell of her warrior self.

Yet Diana had eventually returned to herself, and then to him. She rejoined the League, and that had helped restore much of her vitality for life. The first five years after losing Athos had been the most difficult—for them both. But they'd persevered and had come out of it stronger, wiser, and more in love than ever before.

When we went through all of that, Diana didn't know the truth. Everyone at this table kept it from her.

Yes, they had all lied to Diana. And, based on Hephaestus' presence and his sour expression, the truth had come knocking.

Clark couldn't sit like the others, so he stood at the other end of the table.

"They're fine, asleep when I left."

"Congratulations," came Hephaestus' deep, rough voice. "What shall I call this new niece of mine?"

They all looked to Clark expectantly, wanting to linger in the goodness of this night before the ugliness overran them. But Clark had no good news to deliver, despite Diana's delivery of a stunningly healthy baby girl. His daughter's birth had brought nothing but happiness, Diana's pregnancy free of the pain, weight loss, and fatigue she'd experienced with Athos. Their daughter was meant to be, their son, unfortunately, had not.

"We haven't decided on one yet. We will soon, though," Clark said quickly, when four sets of judgmental eyes bore into him." Under the weight of their gazes and Clark's fear and guilt, he pulled out a chair and sat. "None of you are gathered here to discuss the baby's name. So we might as well get on with it."

"You're right, we're here to discuss what to do about Athos," Hippolyta said, her gaze swinging to Hephaestus in disappointment. "It seems his caretaker has misplaced his charge."

Clark didn't bother with shock, for he wasn't at all surprised. What else would bring Hephaestus to Paradise Island in the middle of the night, waiting three hours just to speak with Hippolyta and Clark?

"How?" Clark asked, not that it mattered. Still, Clark wanted to know what had gone wrong, after all these years.

"Eris," Hera answered instead. "According to Hephaestus, Eris is involved in this up to her devious, deceitful mouth."

"I caught her attacking the boy in his room. When I intervened, questioned her presence in my home, Athos slipped away."

"And you didn't notice?" The angry frustration in Hippolyta's question reverberated off the walls.

"We argued, which gave Athos enough time to escape. We searched, but we couldn't find him."

"Are you saying my son made it out of the mountain or that he is lost somewhere in that maze?"

Hephaestus' red eyes and pointy eyeteeth always gave the impression of him being displeased, at himself, his family, or the world, Clark could never tell. Out of all her siblings, Diana most loved and trusted Hephaestus, which only meant his betrayal would hurt her that much more.

In their efforts to protect Diana, her family had lied to and deceived her, including a husband who'd crept from her bed while she and their newborn slept in peaceful ignorance.

"One of the search parties I sent after Athos stumbled across a destroyed wall. It led to the outside, but they found no Athos."

No one spoke. All knew the implication of Athos coming into contact with the outside world. Yet none but Clark understood how precisely dangerous an alone, frightened, and inexperienced Kryptonian could be under the rays of a yellow sun.

"He broke through that wall with his bare hands. He must not have found the lever to open the gateway. There was blood everywhere. But the trail ended ten miles away from the mountain. From there, we couldn't track him."

"Artemis could, if she were so inclined," Hera said.

She steepled her fingers, her face awash with thoughts. The woman hadn't aged since the first time Clark had met the former goddess. In his bid for power and the throne of Mount Olympus, Apollo had taken away Hera's godly powers, leaving her mortal and vulnerable. Diana had taken Hera in. Over time, a friendship developed between them, despite Hera having turned Hippolyta into a clay statue and the Amazons to snakes, upon learning of the Amazon queen's affair with Zeus.

After fighting by her brother Apollo's side to vanquish Hera and Zeus's first born son, Apollo offered Diana a boon. With the hope of having her mother and sisters returned and of giving Hera back her godhood, Diana asked for exactly that, knowing only Hera could undo her own magical spell. Instead of restoring Hera her godhood, Apollo only returned to her enough magic for Hera to undo her cruel spell.

When Diana and Clark married, Hippolyta invited Hera to live among the Amazons—a peace offering from one queen to another. So here she'd stayed, reaping the benefits of living on an island she created for her loyal worshippers, granting them ageless beauty, which she herself now enjoyed for as long as she remained on the island.

"Or perhaps Apollo could be persuaded to use his viewing pool to locate the boy." Hera said to Hephaestus, "I assume that's how Eris learned of Diana's son. Apollo would not have told her. He knows what she's like, what she would do with such juicy information. By the way, where is that conniving daughter of mine?"

"I have no idea. When we realized Athos was missing, she disappeared. She could be anywhere."

Clark stood, the chair tumbling to the ground with the force of his movement.

Everyone stared at him.

"Eris is looking for Athos, maybe to finish whatever it was you walked in on, Hephaestus. I have to find him first. Diana may not forgive me for lying to her all these years, but I won't be able to forgive myself if I sit here and do nothing while a crazed goddess hunts my son and kills him."

Clark stalked away from the table and out of the throne room. He had no right to claim the child he'd given away. But none of that mattered, Athos was of his flesh. He and Diana had created him, and Clark wouldn't let harm come to him.

So Clark flew to Mount Etna where the trail began. The blood Hephaestus had spoken of was easy enough for Clark to see, even if the sun overhead wasn't burning bright, fueling him as much as it was surely fueling Athos.

For hundreds of miles, Clark followed the trail, invisible to the human eye. With each mile he flew, getting closer to the son he'd abandoned, the same feeling of wrongness that plagued Clark during Diana's pregnancy with Athos assaulted him now. Saving his son was both the right and wrong thing to do, just as when he'd caught him when Hippolyta had thrown baby Athos from the cliff.

What would Clark do with the boy once he found him? Take him back to Hephaestus? To Paradise Island and Diana? What would he tell Diana? How would she react?

Too many disturbing, life altering questions whirled about Clark's head, none of which he wanted to think too deeply on. So he thought of Diana, which wasn't much better than avoiding the inescapable questions.

Clark saw her in his mind's eye, glowing and stunning after giving birth to their daughter. Diana must be awake by now, wondering where her husband had gotten off to only two hours after giving birth to their child. A child whose name they couldn't agree on, a sure sign of bad things between them to come.

She won't forgive you, Clark, the fearful, guilty side of him thought.

Not right away, but she will, in time. That was his hopeful, maybe even naïve side. This was the side of Clark that believed in him and Diana, believed their love was greater than Clark's lies, greater than Diana's hurt and pain of losing Athos.

No, she won't. Even if she does, she won't stay. Why should she, after all you put her through? You've already lost her. Face facts.

I haven't lost anything, dammit. Shut the hell up. I haven't lost Diana. She'll understand. She has to understand.

She won't.

She will. I told you to shut up. Just shut up and go away.

You've spent sixteen years lying to Diana, now you're lying to yourself. Fine, I'll shut up, but I can't go away. I'm a part of you—the ugly, hard to accept truth, your fear and your conscience.

I said go the hell awa—

Clark came to a careening stop. Hovering thousands of feet in the air, he listened, knowing he'd heard a familiar sing-song voice below.

He listened, waited, and then heard it again.

"Come out, come out wherever you are."

Thinking of only saving the son that seemed destined to ruin Clark's happiness with Diana, Superman shot toward his inevitable past and straight into his abysmal future.

TO BE CONTINUED