Indokani
Chapter 12- By a Lekku.
The next day, the aspirants returned to IK-CADCOM at the set time, each carrying their respective incubator with their egg. A few were twitching their tails or tapping their claws nervously, while others had glum expressions as they stared at their incubator's screen marking a dead egg.
Bann examined each one carefully. Forty percent of the aspirants had dead eggs. Twenty-five percent had cracks, large or tiny. The remaining thirty-five percent managed to successfully bring their egg without a single scratch.
Bann took a look at the egg brought by the yellow kryvtor from the day before. "What's your name, soldier?" She inquired.
"Akkono, ma'am." Was the reply.
"You did an excellent job, Akkono. You kept the temperature constant and there's not a single scratch on your egg. Everyone, this is a perfect example of how you should look after your eggs."
Akonno puffed out her chest proudly.
"Okay, I think that was the last one. So let us continue-"
"Ma'am, the Irken is missing." One of the sobrekt pointed out.
Bann raised her crest. Oh, right, she had almost forgotten. "Irken?" She called out, but there was no reply. In fact, she didn't spot the Irken amongst the crowd.
"Maybe he chickened out."
"Or maybe he ate his egg."
Bann shrugged. She wouldn't waste any time waiting for the Irken. "As I was saying-"
"WAIT!"
Purple burst through the door. He was covered in sweat from head to toe, panting heavily to catch his breath. Damn it, of all the times for his hover-belt to run out of juice! He had barely made it; better late than never, right?
He was received with stunned looks from most people, a few others shook their heads or sighed in disappointment. The yellow female (Alonzo, he heard later) shook her head at him with half-closed eyelids.
Those looked like sugar compared to Bann's expression. "Didn't you see what time it is? You were supposed to be here at seven, Not a minute later."
Purple winced. It was just like the Academy. "Sorry! I had a little complication…!"
"Where's your incubator?"
He froze. She had finally noticed. Purple laughed nervously. "It's a funny story…!" He stepped a bit backward, grabbed someone by the lekku waiting just outside and dragged him in. "Maybe he can explain better!"
Most of the aspirants gasped in awe. A few fainted or drooled, or a combination of both, there were a few, repressed squeals of excitement.
"Oh, sweet ancestors, it's him!"
"He's even bigger in person!"
Bann's expression remained stoic, but her eyelids did open in the slightest. The irken has brought Hitorken Zim to the exams? What was he thinking?
"Well, Zim, tell them what you did to the egg!" Purple said in between grit teeth. It took him a lot of willpower not to strangle him then and there.
"Yes, My Tallest! Sobrekt-beast, you must know that what happened was entirely Zim's fault!"
Bann got impatient. "What do you mean 'what happened'? Where is the egg?"
Still forcing a nervous smile, Purple looked for something in his pocket and took out a transparent bag with blue scrambled egg in it. He started sweating again at the agitated looks staring at it.
"What is that?" Bann asked.
"It's what's left of the egg, m-ma'am," Purple said.
"What?"
"It was Zim's fault! You see…"
….
An hour earlier
Looking after the damn incubator all night was a nightmare. The alarm would go off in shorter time periods due to the lower temperature, so he had to keep it close to turn it off as soon as possible before it woke Red up. Unfortunately, he failed a few times because he was too distracted going to the kitchen to get various midnight snacks, which resulted in a loud 'TURN THAT THING OFF, PURPLE!' once or twice.
It's a good thing he had been saving his energy reserves, so he could go through Sobr's forty-eight hour-lasting night without sleeping, but it was hell as bored. He downloaded a few movies and series to watch, some of them of Earth origin. He was particularly interested in the snack cooking contest shows in which hyoomans had to bake pastries and those who made the best won.
At about forty-seven N.C, the incubator announced it would keep the temperature stable by itself for about four hours so he could take a break, so Purple took advantage of it to recharge his energy reserves.
His PAK-alarm sounded at
He found Red, Lena, and a few Invaders in the living room looking over something in the irkpad. Taking a peek, he realized they were scrolling through pictures of the Massive. "Look at this one! It's when we destroyed one of the Resisty's orbital stations!"
"Aawww!"
"Hey, Pur, remember this one? We had a doughnut-eating competition and you won!"
"The good old days," Purple sighed. "Hey, did you guys see the incubator?"
"You mean the infernal device to warm the egg that would sound every damn hour? I thought you had it."
"I left it right on the table while recharging my PAK..." Purple's lekku twitched as he sensed a pleasant smell coming from the kitchen. "Hey, who's making breakfast?"
"I have no idea, but I'm hungry. Hey, whoever you are, hurry up!"
"Coming up, My Tallest!"
That voice! Purple choked on his doughnut. When did Zim come in?! More importantly, how?! He asked the Computer about it. "Somehow he hacked into the door." It replied.
"And why didn't you stop him?!" Red almost shrieked.
"You programmed me to only act upon your orders, master. Since you were both asleep or in a state of dormancy, I couldn't do something to kick him out if you didn't tell me to do so."
Zim walked out of the kitchen wearing an apron and a chef hat (must be a hyooman custom), holding a big plate of a strange blue-colored dish. It smelled nice. Really nice. Too bad it was made by Zim, otherwise Purple might have eaten it. But knowing the defective little menace, he probably put something poisonous in it.
"What's that?" Lena asked curiously.
"You see, it's an earthen custom to make morning meals to your 'friends', so Zim decided to make something for you, My Tallest!"
"That's… interesting, Zim," Red murmured. He poked at the blue dish with the irkpad's stylus. "What is this thing exactly?"
"Scrambled egg!"
Purple froze. He felt an uncomfortable sensation in his squeedly spooch. He exchanged a glance with Red, who had a similar expression. Sweet Irk, please don't let it be what they were imagining!
"Zim, where did you get the eggs?" Lena asked warily.
"Good thing that you ask, ma'am! Zim found a big black egg inside a case, and I thought it would be a tasty meal for my Tallest!"
Purple didn't hear the rest of his explanation. Neither did Red. They were too busy hyperventilating on the couch, both frozen in horrified realization.
…..
Bann couldn't believe it. She had dealt with reckless or idiotic aspirants before, but this takes the cake. "What you are telling me is that you… cooked your egg?"*
"He did!" Purple hurriedly pointed at Zim.
"I am willing to take the punishment for this in my Tallest's stead, lizard!" Zim said with a salute.
You idiot, the punishment is that I'll be disqualified and we'll lose any chance to retrieve the Massive! Purple thought bitterly, glaring at Zim with hatred. Of all the things the defective could do to screw everything up again, he had to destroy the goddamn egg! He'd be lucky if he wasn't disqualified for this!
Bann was yet to react. She was staring at them intently, but her gaze was mostly focused on him. Purple felt a shiver down his spine. Why didn't she say anything? Did she want to make it worse by letting the doubt linger for a little longer?
The other aspirants weren't helping. Most of them were snickering or openly laughing at his bad luck. A few were already protesting and telling Bann to kick him out already.
Just as it seemed Bann was about to give a verdict, someone cried out. "Hey, this one is cracking!"
A male Sobrekt was pointing at his neighbor's incubator. Indeed, the egg had started to crack by itself, releasing the leftover albumen and yolk as a tiny horn pierced through the shell.
Bann immediately made her way towards the incubator. It was hatching? How could this be? These eggs were unfertilized, they couldn't hatch… unless.
She caught a moving shape in the corner of her eye. "You! Don't move!"
The perpetrator, a male kryvtor, stopped in his tracks. Gulping, he turned round to face Bann. She had straightened up. Her talon claws were rhythmically tapping the floor. She wasn't happy.
"Did you replace your egg?"
The kryvtor shook his head vigorously. "No, ma'am! M-Maybe that egg was fertilized all along! I mean, people can make mistakes, right?" He chuckled nervously.
"People can. Embryo scanners and computers can't, soldier, especially when they are being personally supervised by Dr. Scylla herself." Bann was closing in on him until she cornered him against a nearby pillar. "I will ask again, soldier. Did you replace the egg, something I expressly told you was forbidden?"
"I-I…" the kryvtor broke down. "I'm sorry, ma'am! I didn't want to! But my egg cracked after my incubator fell off my lap when I was napping and-!"
"The next time you try to cheat, at least make sure your replacement isn't at the end of its incubation cycle." Bann finished matter-of-factly with a loud growl. "Get out of my sight. Now." She watched the cheater scurry out of the room in-between frightened whimpers.
Purple snickered at what just transpired but quickly regretted it when Bann twisted her neck around to glare at him. He quickly lifted Zim off the ground, intending to use him as a live shield in case she attacked him or something like that.
"As for you, I have every single reason to disqualify you too. For one, you didn't bring your egg intact," she glanced at the scrambled blue egg. "Secondly, you cowardly tried to completely pin the blame on someone else when the egg was YOURS to look after. Whatever happens to it is YOUR responsibility."
Purple was very tempted to choke Zim right then, right there.
"Unfortunately," Bann sighed and scrolled down her tablet. "Without that cheater, we're down to sixty-nine aspirants, and the minimum quota is seventy. And since you're the only failure who's still around here," she murmured something under her breath.
"Hey, wait a minute!" A Sobrekt snapped. "That's not fair! He didn't even bring the incubator!"
"Why does the Irken get special treatment?!" Another shrieked.
The rest of the sixty-nine began to protest Bann's decision, many of them shooting Purple nasty looks. Purple felt a shiver down his spine, particularly when he noticed the venom in Akkono's eyes.
"BE QUIET!" Bann snarled, scaring the aspirants into silence. "If you have any complaints, then go to the higher ups. Those of you who were very lucky to pass," she glanced at Purple, "The next stage of the exams will take in the training circuits in Midosis tomorrow at twelve N.C. If you have a ship of your own, you can go by yourselves. You only have to show the mark in your hand and the orbital guard will let you in. That will be all. You're all dismissed."
Purple was the first to scramble out of there before any of the other aspirants could maul him. He could defend himself, but he'd rather not waste his time on the lizards. It wasn't because he was afraid of losing his head, no sir!
"You did it, My Tallest!" Zim cried on the way out.
Purple's eye twitched as he made his way to a trashcan a few steps away.
Caphractus is the fifth planet in the Dylinae system, so naturally, it's climate is far colder than Sobr's during the winter months. Even during springtime, it's perpetually covered in thinner layers of snow. Most of the planet's biome consists of boreal woods eternally bathed in white frozen water with gentle snowflakes or devastating snowstorms. Judging by the climate and how most of this planetary system's natives were cold-blooded, one would think the Sobrekt wouldn't set foot on this planet.
Larb soon learned this wasn't the case. The climate was extremely cold, yes, but there were greenhouse-like domes spread out throughout the planet. The climate inside most of these domes was similar to Sobr's own, but a few had desert or tropical biomes. There was a great variety of organisms living inside these artificial habitats.
From what little information he managed to get on Sob and judging by the development diary, Caphractus was used to test and watch the behavior of newly-created hybrids, which are then cloned and bred with genetic differences between specimens. When one shows the wanted behavior, its genome is taken and used for mass production.
The dome used for Project Zimkro seemed to be of the forestal biome, but there were additionally some cliffs included and wide aerial space. Larb broke into the laboratory area first to learn whatever he could about this creature's behavior and appearance. Just like in HybGen's labs, there were many computers around the room, all of them seemingly empty. Security wasn't as tight in here, probably because access to Caphractus itself was restricted to all but the scientists involved in each project.
He saw one of the computers was on. Even better, there was a paused video feed in it. Oh, this was good! Larb snickered to himself as he went to take a closer look. To his surprise, he realized it was the Tallest's Irktube channel, 1000 Ways Zim Ruins Anything. He also saw a compilation of Zim's screaming moments and yells. The logs mentioned something about imprinting. They wanted the creature to think of Zim as its parent? Why?
Larb's lekku twitched in direction of the door. Someone was coming! He hid under one of the desks just as a kryvtor in a white coat stepped in. He seemed to be talking to someone, but there was no one around. Must be talking through a communicator.
"Up to now, the asset has shown to have learned certain behavior traits from the parental unit, and additionally from Hitorken Zim's own DNA, ma'am. Hyperactivity, fondness of destruction, the tendency of yelling loudly—"
"Then he's ready." A female voice concluded.
"No, ma'am. The asset won't expel its pilot without external intervention. We're not sure why. Additionally, it doesn't follow commands and is completely unpredictable."
"Don't give me excuses. Just solve it." She sounded angry.
"We're trying to, ma'am, but the asset won't let us within a mile of him, he's already sent a few people to the infirmary."
"NO excuses, Killick. This creature is my masterpiece, and I want to present it to Hitorken Zim at its best."
Larb quickly moved from that desk to the next one while the kryvtor was distracted. The lizard was so deep into the conversation that he didn't notice the hand slip into his pocket and take out his keycard. As soon as the scientist moved down the hall, Larb made his way down the opposite corridors until he reached the door that led into the habitat. After making sure there were no guards, he used the keycard. The scanner's light turned yellow and allowed him entry.
The invader felt a deep relief when the air around him warmed up considerably. He hated snow and ice. If this thing has Irken DNA, that would explain why its habitat was considerably templated. Larb noticed the place used holographic panels to simulate a clear green sky. Most of the plants seemed to be native from Sobr, but he recognized a few other species from other planets.
Larb moved through the thick foliage slowly, using his PAK's binoculars and heat detention scanners to look for any signs of the creature. Along the way, he found big piles of black excrement in different stages of decomposition. He had to make a temporary stop to throw up.
Damn it, judging by the size of that discharged bodily waste matter, this animal must be very big. This was confirmed as he came across a footprint that was roughly the size of his zhook runner. Damn it, this would make the job harder. Poison wouldn't do for a quick job.
A twig snapped behind him. He turned around, PAK-lasers at ready, but there was no one there. The heat scanners didn't catch any heat either. Another twig. And another. And another. And every single time he saw nothing.
This made him realize he didn't know just how intelligent this animal was. How smart the Sobrekt designed it to be. He wanted to think it was as dumb as Zim, but this strange behavior was proving otherwise. It didn't have only ZIM's NDA, it was a combination of many other beasts; maybe one of those components was intelligent.
A drop of something splashed unto his head. Larb jumped back in disgust and wiped the water off…
Wait a minute. This couldn't be water. It was far too thick and viscous. Larb took a closer look at his humid glove. It was a clear, semi-transparent substance with a pinkish hue. A second, larger drop splashed against his head, almost soaking him completely. Larb shrieked and frantically started wiping it off until he realized this substance had to come from somewhere. *
By the time he realized what was going on, it was too late. A large shadow descended upon him with a deafening hiss-like shriek.
"I'm nervous."
"Chill out, you just have to stay on your feet and pummel your boyfriend."
"But I can't beat him! That's the point of this!"
Gaz shook her head, sighing in irritation. What the hell does she want to hear, then? From what she could understand, she and the blue lizard had to fight, but neither could beat the other in combat. What's the point of the fight then? Oh, well, must be something normal for these type of aliens. From what she had seen of the Sobrekt so far, coming to a physical altercation and blow exchange was the equivalent of a marital argument.
Ilk didn't realize Gaz wasn't paying attention and kept venting. "I mean, I fought him before when I was shorter, but I think he wasn't really going all out on me back then. And Echo said he's a really fast opponent when he doesn't hold back. What if-?"
Gaz had enough. She walked over to Ilk and smacked the back of her head. Once she had her attention, she growled."Shut up and listen, if you really want it to work out, then show him who's in charge. Don't let him intimidate you, show him that you're his equal.'
Ilk rubbed the back of her head, rather intimidated herself. How come Zim was dating this hyooman? Don't take her wrong, she was happy for him, but Gaz was scary. Heck, half of the Invaders and even dad were afraid of her. She took a deep breath. "Okay, then. I think I'm ready."
Ilk and Gaz walked out of the house and into the courtyard, which had been completely cleared out of tables, leaving enough space for the combat. Blue was already there, and he looked even more nervous than Ilk herself. His uncle Sakr offered him a few pats on the head before walking over to a side, waiting for Ilk to approach. Once there, both were asked to stand on the marked spots, facing each other.
Gaz separated from Ilk and went to the chairs, where Blue's direct family, Zim's red boss, the latter's wife and a few other Irkens were seated. They were supposed to watch the fight to act as witnesses to the couple's worthiness and compatibility with each other.
"When does this start? The sooner it does, the sooner it ends." Gaz asked rather impatiently.
"As soon as Purple and Zim show up, again," Lena sighed.
"Hopefully they won't arrive and we can call this off," Red murmured nervously. He wasn't worried about Zim's little blunder: Purple had sent them a PAK-mail, telling them that he managed to get to the second round by sheer luck. It was this pre-wedding stage that was freaking him out. What if the lizard seriously hurt Ilk?
"Red!" Lena hushed him sternly. She spoke a bit too harshly than intended, though.
"Geez, you okay?" Brava asked her.
"I'm fine!" Lena said quickly. She quickly grabbed her bag of steamed scarabs and started eating them, averting her gaze from her mate.
Purple arrived twenty minutes later and took his seat next to Red, but the deep frown on his face let them know he didn't want to talk about the issue, so they let him be for now. "Hey, can we get started?"
"Where is Hitorken Zim?" Chakra inquired. "We're not starting without him."
Red's eye started twitching in irritation. "As far as I know, this is supposed to be a family-only thing, isn't it? Zim is certainly not part of the family."
"They aren't either," Brava said matter-of-factly as she pointed a claw at Tenn, Skutch and the others.
"That's different, we don't hate them," Purple said. He glared at Skoodge and Bob in their little corner, away from their fellow Irkens. He quickly added, "Except those two."
"Hitorken Zim is our guest," Deltra growled.
Zim arrived shortly after, but there was an awful stench reeking off him. Gaz was about to ask why but realized she didn't need to when she saw the dark spots all over him and the fly-like bugs flying all over his head.
"Don't worry, my Tallest, Zim is safe and sound! I managed to find my way back to Blue-beast's house!"
Purple's only response was to take a mouthful of chips into his mouth.
"What happened to you, Zim?" Gaz inquired.
"Tallest Purple accidentally left me behind, but thanks to my incredible sense of orientation I have returned." Zim held out a bouquet of carnivorous plants. "Zim brought you flowers, my Gaz-demon!"
Gaz raised an eyebrow. Zim only gave her details like these when he wanted something; probably that she let him sit next to her despite the awful smell. She usually wasn't fond of flowers, but these ones were actually nice. They'd snap at people who tried to touch them, just like the short, ugly Irken who just got a nasty bite. If anything, she could put these on Dib's bed when they got back.
"Thanks." She said, accepting the bouquet rather reluctantly. As she suspected, Zim happily sat next to her and proceeded to hold her hand. Good thing she brought a gas mask.
Red, Purple and the rest of the Invaders moved away with disgusted groans.
"Are you guys done?" Sakr asked, tapping his claw impatiently. "Where was I? Oh, right," Clearing his throat, he took some electronic flashcards out of his pocket, courtesy of Skoodge. "I bid thee welcome to the second pre-kekkonshu of Blue, son of Kobato and Deltra, and Irken Ilk, daughter of Tallest Fred."
"It's RED!" Red shouted angrily.
"Red, sit down!" Lena snapped at her mate.
"He did it on purpose!"
"If I may continue," Sakr growled as he bristled his crest at Red. "This fight is meant to test your skills, strength and if you're worthy. The rules are simple: you fight until either your opponent can't continue or surrenders. In order to pass, however, both of you must get into a stalemate after an hour of combat. This will prove that you are compatible and can stand as equals."
Purple muttered something about a compatibility test being easier before being shushed by Lena.
"You are free to use any sort of martial art, but the use of weapons or gadgets is strictly forbidden. Should any of you break this rule, the fight will be rendered null. Any questions?"
"Does that rule apply for my PAK?" Ilk asked.
"Does it carry weapons and gadgets?"
"Yes."
"Then it applies. No spidery-leg things, no guns, you get the idea?"
Ilk shifted in place. She had been hoping to at least be allowed to use her PAK. Then again, she still wasn't used to the PAK-legs. Besides, she had downloaded lots of martial arts from Earth's native action Zim for that.
"He's not going to dismember my baby, is he?!" Red practically yelled the question.
Sakr and Blue rolled their eyes. "Dismemberment is not allowed in these fights, your Tallest. Other than that, every type of martial art is acceptable." The former said. "Okay, any more questions? No? Okay…" Sakr stepped back, raised his hand and made a cutting notion. "Begin!"
It happened to fast that none saw it coming, not even Ilk. In the blink of an eye, Blue dashed across the arena and kicked Ilk in the head, sending her to the ground. Red instinctively jumped to his feet, but Lena and Purple held him back. They couldn't intervene. Ilk was a fully-fledged soldier now. She could take care of herself.
Ilk fell to the ground with a painful thud, but she didn't waste time and rolled aside and got back to her feet before Blue's talon struck the spot she had been on. Damn it, he really was going all out on her! His movements were swift and deadly. If he wasn't holding back, then she wouldn't either. She had to get through this for an hour.
She responded to Blue's attack with one of the earthen martial arts, something called 'kungfu'. It was a bit complicated at first, it had lots of sub-branches with the names of animals, but she finally picked the 'mantis' and 'snake'. In this instance she found the PAK to be very useful: it downloaded the information into her organic brain and her body did the rest.
The movements caught Blue by surprise. He dodged most of the attacks, but he had never seen this fighting style before. Ilk had certainly toughened up since their adventure on Hoth, something which attracted him to her even more. He missed the cue and received a nasty punch in the stomach that incapacitated him momentarily.
Ilk got worried when Blue fell to his knees, clutching his abdomen. "Blue, are you okay?!" She tried offering a hand, but he grabbed it and lifted her off the ground to smash her on the ground.
Blue got right on top of her, smirking. "The first rule: don't show concern over your opponent until you're certain he's completely defeated."
"That was a dirty trick, lizard!" Red shouted, but again he was stopped from going over to the arena by Lena.
"Red, be quiet!" She snapped.
Ilk responded with a strong kick in his stomach to throw him off a few feet away. "Second rule: if you're going to pummel someone just do it, don't blabber about it."
Purple laughed. "I taught her that! Yaaay!"
Blue snickered. "You sure are a fast learner!"
"Of course I am. I am an Irken Elite soldier, the best of what the Irken Empire has to offer." Ilk responded with a smirk of her own.
Red swore there was something in his eye that made it produce the liquid lubricant- thing. That was his smeet.
The rest of the hour passed quickly for Ilk and Blue. Both received and dodged blows, but fought at the limit of their strength, forcing themselves to keep going despite the pain. By the time they were finally told to stop, both were sore, sweating and covered in bruises. Their minor cuts and scratches healed in only a few seconds thanks to the regeneration gene both had.
"You both are still standing after an hour of open combat," Sakr said as he stepped forward with a grin. "You are equally matched and worthy of each other. May your children cut as many heads as your combined strength!" That said, Deltra and Blue's sisters made chirping-like calls while stamping their heads.
Red shivered at the idea of his baby girl being touched by the Blue-beast's filthy alien meat. How did the Sobrekt make hatchling-smeets, anyway? Not by cloning, that's for sure. He noticed Lena stiffening at the mention of children. "I know, I don't wanna imagine it either."
"Huh? What?"
"You know, the lizard-meat putting his… his…" Red shivered in disgust again. "Whatever they call it inside my baby!"
*The part with the egg is from Diary of a Wimpy Kid, the sixth one I think.
*Inspired on some horror or adventure movies in which the character realizes the monster is right above them due to the saliva falling on top of them from above.