CHAPTER 12:

It was House's last day serving under Cuddy and not the way in which he wanted. The last three months were boring for him and uneventful as he helped Cuddy file papers and search for donors. Cuddy certainly kept him busy, but she couldn't stop him from being continually curious about his passion for medicine. He was constantly checking on Foreman's cases, since he managed to steal Cuddy's pass word to the hospital's mainframe. It was frustrating for him to be unable to do anything after watching the countless mistakes made by his team. Thankfully, after today, that nightmare would be over since the Medical Board was happy enough with his progress to honor his license again and allow him to practice. This day couldn't end fast enough for him. So, he decided to take a break and visit Wilson. Upon hearing his door open, Wilson looks up to see House who plops himself casually in the chair across from him.

Wilson looks at him quizzically and asks, "What are you doing in here? You're supposed to be helping Cuddy."

"I'm on a break." He answers.

"You were on a break fifteen minutes ago."

House says, "That was a bathroom break."

Wilson looks at him not buying it and asks, "For fifteen minutes?"

"Blame the cafeteria food."

Wilson says drily, "I would if you actually bought your own."

House jokes, "Then blame Cuddy's shrieking. It goes right through me…..literally."

Wilson jokes, "And what's your excuse this time? Her skirt is so tight it's cutting off circulation to your penis?"

"I'm a cripple, remember. I have to get the circulation moving in my leg."

"And yet you're sitting here." Wilson says sarcastically.

"Figured I'd work from the bottom up. Penis comes later when I'm staring at Cuddy's cleavage."

Wilson looks down, signing some papers and says, "Go back to Cuddy."

House rolls his eyes and says, "Oh come on. You know there's only so many times I can entertain myself dropping things, so I can watch her pick them up. After while…it's just sad."

Wilson says to him coyly, "Maybe she….wants…to entertain you."

"If she really wanted to entertain me, she would have went with me on that date she promised months ago….not tease me."

Wilson comes in defense of Cuddy, "House, you were being investigated by the medical board because of your…"

"Trip to Fantasy Island? If you ask me that place was way overrated. I think Mr. Roarke and Tatoo were scam artists, since my fantasies didn't come true at all. I'm still here." He remarks, finishing Wilson's thought.

"She was trying to protect you and herself. It wouldn't exactly look good for the Dean of Medicine to be engaged in an affair with her lunatic, suspended doctor."

"Well if she was looking for secrecy, I could have easily covered that by having her hide under the desk and attributed the enormous amounts of moaning to leg pain."

Wilson gives him a devilish smile.

Curiously looking at Wilson he asks, "What's that evil grin for?"

Wilson replies, "Admit it. You're going to miss working with her."

"If by work you mean being her piss boy, I'd rather be hallucinating Amber again….she was way more interesting. The only thing I'm gonna miss are the phone calls from her mother. Did you know that she wonders what it's like to breastfeed? I'd offer to show her what it's like but then she'd know I was listening in on her phone calls."

Appalled Wilson says, "Wait…..you've been listening in on her phone calls?"

"More like accidentally hitting the conference call button as I transferred her calls."

Shaking his head in disgust Wilson notes, "You're unbelievable."

"Also turns out that Cuddy's mother thinks I'm witty and charming. How can I argue with her on that?"

"Cuddy's mother obviously doesn't know you."

"Hey, Cuddy's desk didn't get into her office by magic. I had to get the key for the storage unit it was in from her mother. I must say that she was completely taken by my charming personality." House says in debonair fashion.

Wilson quips, "She was taken all right."

"I also found out Cuddy does yoga. God, can you imagine the amount of positions she could get into? "

Wilson answers drily, "Yeah, I'm sure you and your bum leg would hold up just fine."

"Hey, I said positions she could get into. I could just lay there and be satisfied."

Just then Wilson's phone rings and he picks it up.

"Dr. Wilson." There is silence for a minute and then Wilson looks at House and says, "Yes, he's here." There is a pause for a moment until Wilson says, "I will."

Wilson then hangs up the phone.

House jokes, "Let me guess….my groupie was looking for me."

"Yes, and she's pissed. Gee I wonder why."

House gets up and says, "Hi-ho! Hi-ho! It's back to hell I go."

As House puts his hand on the door to open it, Wilson stops him.

"House." Then, House turns to face him. Wilson continues.

"This is your last day working with her. Go easy on her, because she's gone through a lot of crap these last few months to keep you here and sane."

Frustrated, knowing that Wilson is right, House exhales and responds, "Fine. God, you suck the life out of everything. You used to be fun. Remind me not to invite you to my next shiny happy people party."

With that House opens the door and exits Wilson's office.

While House is making the trip back down to Cuddy's office, we find her speaking with Foreman about a current case.

Cuddy asks Foreman as she's looking through some charts he handed her, "What else did you find out?"

"Not much. We're stuck and the patient is deteriorating faster than we can diagnosis. Right now I think this is our best option."

Just then House limps into the office.

On seeing Foreman he says, "Well, if it isn't mini me. By the look of the sweat on your forehead, I'd say you were in trouble."

Irritated Cuddy asks House, "Shut up and put these files in the drawer like you're supposed to be doing." She hands him a stack.

He takes it from her and remarks, "That's abuse of a cripple you know."

Cuddy reacts, "Yeah, well, if you don't keep your mouth shut, I'm going to take that cane and cripple your other leg."

"I love it when you get nasty. Turns me on." House starts putting files in the drawer

Cuddy turns to Foreman and says, "Please ignore the giant idiot in my office. I'd take him back, but he's so damaged no one else wants him."

House turns around to her smiles and says, "Nice."

Cuddy focuses her attention back on Foreman, "You were saying."

Foreman tells her, "I think a brain biopsy is the only way we can go right now. I know it's scary with the patient being a baby, but we've hit a road block with each treatment."

Curious House asks, "What are the symptoms?"

Cuddy fires back, "Don't answer him. Run the scans again and make absolutely sure this is necessary. Then, let me see the scans before I have you getting consent from the parents."

Foreman tries to convince her again, "If we run the scans again, we're only going to find out what we already know."

House chimes in, "Which is?"

Foreman answers House, "That the baby has some sort of infection connected with a bulging fontanelle. She also has internal swelling of the throat."

Annoyed, Cuddy answers Foreman, "Don't talk to him!"

House chimes, "Do the biopsy."

Cuddy turns to House and angry says, "Shut up!" She then turns to Foreman and says, "Run the scans again and then report back me. We'll discuss then."

Foreman nods and as he turns to leave, House fake coughs the word "wuss." Foreman gives him a dirty look and leaves.

Cuddy looks at House with disgust and tells him, "You're amazing, you know that?"

"So, I've been told." He jokes. Then he says to her, "You know what's really amazing? The fact that a neurologist was telling someone who isn't that a patient needs a brain biopsy. Humm…what's wrong with that picture."

"The patient is an infant. So, I'd rather be one hundred percent sure it's necessary before I go drilling into a baby's head. Unlike you, Foreman understands that."

"I guess I missed that part on account of him urging you to give permission for a brain biopsy." He sarcastically says.

"If the patient were older, I'd have no problems issuing permission….and why am I arguing with you? You're not allowed to give a consult."

"No, but I am allowed to offer a suggestion." Then House's wheels start turning as he feels he's onto something. "Which is why you wanted me back in here. You wanted me to hear what Foreman had to say."

"Oh yeah, clearly evidenced by me telling you to shut up."

"Ah, but you could have easily kicked me out of your office at any time or talked with Foreman somewhere else. You didn't. You kept me here."

Cuddy sits there nervously and says, "If I were to give you this file by accident and you looked in it, what would you suggest that I'm going to pretend to ignore."

Cuddy hands House the file.

House takes it, smiles and says to her, "Ooo you naughty girl. I think I'm getting chubby."

Cuddy rolls her eyes at him.

As House is looking at the file he starts reciting some of the symptoms aloud, "Fever….signals infection….vomitting…..loss of appetite….swelling of the throat…"

As he continues to look at the file, he tells Cuddy, "Call Foreman and ask him if the baby has a high-pitched cry and is lethargic. Then ask him if anyone has been sneezing or sick around the baby."

"What are you thinking?"

House teasing her says, "Ask him and then I'll tell you."

Cuddy picks up the phone and calls Foreman. Cuddy asks him the questions House posed to her. Foreman checks with the parents who tell him that they have noticed a change in pitch with their baby's cry and that the baby has been sleeping a lot.

Cuddy lies to Foreman and tells him that she's looking up something and to hold on a minute.

Turning to House with her hand over the receiver she tells House, "Foreman said yes to your questions."

House looks at her and tells her, "Tell Foreman to do the biopsy and check for Haemophilus Influenza type B. If it proves positive, treat with antibiotics."

Cuddy gives him a worried look.

House says, "Now is the time to be objective, Cuddy. If he doesn't do this and we delay any longer, the baby could die."

She nods and gives Foreman House's instructions.

Later that evening, Taub comes down to Cuddy's office with a smile on his face. House is looking over her shoulder at the computer.

Taub says, "You were right."

House jokes, "She usually is."

Taub continues," The biopsy went well and the tests concluded that the baby has Hib. Turns out the mother had a cold before the baby got sick. She must have sneezed on her and carried the infection to the baby. We started the baby on antibiotics and she should be fine."

Relieved Cuddy says, "That's great, Taub. Thank you."

Taub exits.

House arrogantly says, "Another life saved even when he's just a bench warmer."

Cuddy gives a sly grin and says, "You're pretty proud of yourself aren't you?"

'Why wouldn't I be? Your golden boy proved how shiny he still is."

"Yeah, well, here golden boy." She hands him a file. "You're still on my clock."

House looks at his watch and says, "Not anymore in…..five….four….three….two…one."

"You know, you're an idiot" House tells her.

"Can't tell you how much I missed being called that. "She says sarcastically.

House tells her, "If you had Foreman waste his time doing more scans, you'd have been taking minutes away from that kid's life. Then, the baby would die and you'd end up crying your eyes out with a carton of frozen yogurt in front of you with me telling you I told you so."

"And if you weren't such an emotionally introverted annoying ass, then your brilliant mind wouldn't be wasted doing my paperwork and filing for three months."

House rolls his eyes, "God, get me out of here before I become a woman with neurotic tendencies and a widening ass."

He goes to the door.

She picks up her briefcase, follows him saying, "Get me out of here before I become a limping workaholic with no inner sensor and an inflated ego."

House smiles and asks, "Pick you up in an hour?"

"Yes, but not on your motorcycle .And wear the blue shirt. It's my favorite." She smiles.

He smiles as he holds the door, letting her out first and then following behind.