Chapter 12
Jake and I sat up against a tree. I was leaning against him, still tired, but awake enough to pay attention. I didn't want to be the focus of the attention anymore, though I knew that was unavoidable. After a while people started to look away from me and I felt a little better. One look I couldn't forget though was Emily's. She didn't look at me quite as friendly like she had used to and it hurt a little. I'd thought, she of all people would have accepted this. At least better than most, but I guess I was wrong.
As everyone stopped talking and started focusing to the grouping up front, Old Quil, Quil's grandfather, started to talk.
"We are all gathered here now, because of something that has happened. Something amazing. It was wrong of us to exclude that part of the legends for whatever reason, but the main thing now is, it's real and it's happened. I know many of you have not gotten the chance to hear this Legend and that is why we are here, so I will tell it now."
There was a brief pause before he continued and everyone remained completely quiet. I could almost feel everyone's attention click on to being focused on what he was about it say. It was still amazing the amount of authority the council had over everyone.
"The Legend was told that a pack leader, no specific leader, could meet a special human girl and fall in love. We are still unsure of what special really means.
"At some point, during their first real kiss, meaning they both had to have wanted it, a bond begins to build, on both sides. They will both imprint. This certain imprint is different from the other kind; this imprint gives power to the human girl, causing her to become a werewolf. The change is different from our kind; hers is almost immediate, sometimes happening within seconds, or longer depending on the girl. She will gain all the same extra abilities as you; great strength, speed, hearing, and the warmth, but all happening before the first phase. Her first phase will be painful, but after that, it is all complete. She becomes one of us in every way.
"Some never found out the real reasons behind it. Whether it was to make the pack stronger, because she becomes just as powerful as the leader, or if it was because there was something horrible lurking not too far behind that causes it to happen. Many have assumed that if this was really true, then maybe things weren't ever really bad enough for this to happen to the other girls over the generations, or maybe she just didn't hold the power within herself. Since it is a very rare thing, the truth of that may never be found out, and maybe it's all of that. But either way, we see now today, that this legend was most definitely true."
I was completely frozen. It had sounded just like everything Sam and Jake had said, but hearing it all at once, from someone who knew about it, it just made it that much more believable. Old Quil turned to me with a slight smile.
"We welcome Bella to our pack today."
I had no idea what to do. Was I supposed to stand up, bow, smile, say hi, or even thank them? I just held still and barely smiled. That was beyond awkward.
I was met by only a few welcoming, staring eyes. The rest were confused, angry, and guarded all at once. I couldn't blame them, surely they believed the legend was true now, but I could tell they didn't believe the intentions of it. Maybe it wasn't believed, because it did mean something horrible was coming. Whether they were confused it was me that was chosen to become this, or the fact other things may get bad, I had no clue.
Billy spoke next and I was truly grateful.
"Now I'm sure many of you have questions about this and now would be a good time to ask them," he said.
It was like I was in school again, hands shot up all over the place. So many questions and I couldn't think coherently enough to form even one of mine.
Billy chose Paul to ask his question first.
"So why Bella?" he asked, and I was a little offended.
"That's easy Paul. Jacob loved her, as she loved him. That's obvious, seeing what has become of that," Billy answered, sounding annoyed. Paul just grunted and folded his arms across his chest. "But what's so special about her?" he spit out. But he was glared at by both Sam and Billy, so he stayed quiet and looked down.
I noticed some hands dropped down after Billy had answered. Either they had the same question, or suddenly didn't want to ask theirs. My own questions slowed a little, but neither were clear enough to speak.
"So what does this mean? What's going to happen now? I know you said that no one knows the real reason to why this happens, but if it's because something bad is coming, what could it be?" Quil asked suddenly.
That had been one of my many questions and I was glad he asked, but scared to hear the answer. Whatever might have been coming, I knew wouldn't be good. I couldn't even guess, but somehow, in the back of my head, I thought it might be coming for me. Everything else usually did.
"The reasoning still isn't clear," Old Quil agreed. "If it does mean something is about to come, I'm sure whatever it is will be handled, but I do not have any idea to what that may be."
Everyone was silent for a moment. I was thinking about what could happen. What could be so bad, that it made me, a human and non-Quileute, become this. Seth interrupted my thoughts.
"What about the Cullens?" he asked suddenly. My jaw dropped. I didn't think anyone would have brought them up, but I had forgotten that Seth had become quite close to Edward after that battle with Victoria and Riley. Leave it to him to worry about them.
"What does it matter?" I heard several people say at once.
"Well, I just meant that... What will they do, if anything? I know this wasn't in the treaty, but what if they react towards it? What if Edward does?"
I hadn't thought about that. I hadn't be able to get past Edward's reaction to think about what he may do. What if he was planning on attacking? What if they all were? I just shook my head and I realized that several eyes were focused on me again.
"Don't look at me!" I shouted. I was mad that they still assumed that I knew what Edwards plans were. I may have known if I hadn't phased, but I did and Edward was gone before I had returned with Sam. "I have no clue what he could plan to do, hell I don't even care at the moment. He was gone after I phased." I told them honestly.
I remembered then that I hadn't explained to Jake or Sam what exactly happened with what caused me to phase at that time. They just assumed they knew and Sam had Edwards scent from the area, but no details. Their eyes were locked on me, expecting me to continue.
I sat up straight, preparing myself to speak and I felt Jake's hand on my shoulder. I looked at him and he eyed the group of people nervously. I realized then that I was starting to shake again as I felt the slight burn. I took a deep breath, calming myself, and it stopped.
"Ok so, I was heading home earlier, but right when I got to, what I guess what treaty line, I saw Edward's car. I knew my truck wouldn't be fast enough to turn and head back to Jake's and I didn't want to be a chicken and run away from what I knew needed to be done. So I talked to him and explained it all. When he didn't believe me and started laughing, I got mad and it was when he was being so damn calm about the whole thing, that really set me off. But when he tried to hug me, I then tried to explain why we couldn't see each other, that's when I phased." I quickly explained, they all just stared at me, looking even more confused.
"You were mad you had to leave the bloodsucker?" Leah growled. And I could tell it was a question that most them had.
"No! No, it was the fact he wasn't getting the point," I told her, as calmly as I could. "Like I said, he was being so calm and trying to find something there to make it work. Being inside your guys' heads before, he knew what the imprinting was about, he knew there was no changing what I feel for Jacob, even if I had wanted to, which I would never. I still have no clue why he pushed it, but I guess I can't blame him. I don't know, but no, I was not mad because I had to leave him. I actually felt some relief when I did, to be honest." I surprised myself with the last part, as well as others. Some even started laughing.
"How did you not kill him?" Paul asked, slightly less annoyed than before.
"Well, I didn't want to. Just because I'm a... I'm what I am now, doesn't mean I'm just going to jump up and kill them all. I don't want to kill anyone. Plus, I was too confused. He just stood there, staring at me while I had him pinned to my truck. He didn't even flinch. I was standing in the middle of the road and just decided to run. And that was that," I said, shrugging.
Jake looked at me surprised. "You had him pinned?" he asked. When I nodded, he smiled.
"Wow, I would have loved to see that. Hell, I would have loved to do that. But I wouldn't have run away, not until I was finished with him." he said, and the guys started laughing.
I just stared at him, and backed away a little.
"What Bells?" he asked.
"Nothing," I said and turned to look back at the others, I hoped we could just continue that for later, but the glares I was getting from the rest of the pack, wasn't much better. I sighed. "You just can't expect me to forget them you know. Sure, I don't feel the same for them anymore and I won't see them ever again, but you can't expect me to be happy when it comes to thinking about their deaths!"
I could tell Jake was thinking that over some, but he didn't think much.
"Bella, when are you going to finally realize that this is their faults? I would have thought, now that you have gone through what we have, you would finally get it. None of this would be happening if they had never moved here. Our lives would be normal, yours especially."
"What would be stopping other vampires to come through? Not just the Cullens?" I argued.
"Then we would have killed them. We would have killed the Cullens too if you hadn't been so close to them. Jake wouldn't let us, because you meant so much to him," Paul said, with the disgusted tone again.
I tried to disagree more, but something inside me felt like they were right. If I had never met Edward my life wouldn't be on everyone's targets and I would still be a normal girl, however normal I was, but now I was far from it. I just closed my mouth and looked down at me feet.
Jake put his arm around me again and whispered, "I know you cared for them, almost as if they were regular people, but the truth is, they're not. They have changed everyone's lives just by being here, existing. And they don't even care, not one bit."
I started thinking about my life again and the changes in it in the past year. My life had gone from a boring somewhat normal life to a dangerous exciting one. Of course I wished that my death wasn't the want of the things endangering it, but that's how it goes with vampires. But with all that, I couldn't exactly regret it all, I couldn't really regret this moment; another surprise to myself. That also means that I couldn't exactly regret meeting Edward either, not that I would try to.
But the fact was still there. The Cullens, rather I wanted to admit it or not, were the starting of all of this to happen. I sighed again.
As if kind of echoing my thoughts, Jake started mumbling something to himself and I focused on it.
"They all kept saying the werewolves were too dangerous for her, but really, since it's their fault we're like this, that makes them even more dangerous. I bet I don't even know half of the shit they put her through and the danger it has caused her... "
And he was right. He had no idea the things I've been through with them. Just going to Italy alone was enough to end my life in several different ways and enough to keep me afraid until I was either turned into a vampire or already dead.
I was kind of glad he didn't know that part, but again I wished he did. I felt weird now, not exactly sure why, but my outlook on things were a lot different. Not only was I put in the place of the werewolves and now know from experience what the presence of the Cullens can cause, but I was now slightly agreeing with them. Even if I was somewhat excited, aside from terrified, about the new things to experience. I had to keep another secret an even bigger one. I had to keep it from Charlie, Renee, and everyone else. Never letting them know what I've become.
The one thing I do hate about everything is all the secrets and lies.
I put my arm around Jacob's waist and leaned in to kiss his cheek. "You're right," I whispered to him.
A hint of rage flashed in his eyes, but was covered up fast by sadness as he tightened his arm around me and kissed my forehead. I assumed he knew I meant that towards everything.
We both turned to face everyone who was still watching us. "What now?" I asked.
"We wait," Sam answered. "You learn to control yourself in the process. I guess that is all there is to do. The same thing we always do when we've, once again, gained another member in the pack." The council members agreed.
I stood there staring at the fire that was dying out, I didn't really notice it until then. I was mad that all I could was sit and wait again. That always seemed to be what I was doing; waiting for something or someone to come, someone who wanted me or my death. Though I wasn't sure what the difference was anymore.