I do NOT own Bonanza or any of the original Cartwright characters. Warning: You may need a box of Kleenex for the first scene.

Long Road Back

Chapter Twelve

Scene Twenty-One

"I'm…better man…You can be driven…" Cain's face appeared, then the rest of him. He had the gun on Adam, withheld the food and water, and then the final battle. Adam wanted to kill the man, wanted it bad, but no, he wasn't going to stoop to that man's level. He turned to leave only to hear Cain yelling, "You can't….me to die…." Anger welled up inside him. Why not? After all the hell he'd put him through, why not? 'The thing that rankles me the most….they left me to die…" Adam had to go back.

"Adam?" Tara, who had been sitting on the couch working on mending one of Hoss' shirts, quickly put it down as Adam started shaking slightly and rushed to his side; he was sitting in "his" chair, the one near the staircase. "Calm down," she said as she laid her hand on his arm, "no one here is going to hurt you."

Just then, Ben walked in the front door. Lynn Caine and his sister had talked with Ben, Hoss and Little Joe. "For the sake of your son," Lynn had said as he looked upon Ben, "I hope he does remember so he can recover. I do not need to know; I already know how abusive and insane my father was. All I needed to find out is where he was so I could shut my mother up. For your son's sake though, I will just say Miss Tara found him on her way here and buried him." He and then taken his wife and left. Upon hearing, and seeing, Tara trying to calm Adam down Ben hurried over to his son's side. He only meant to assure his son that everything was all right, but found himself telling him, "Let it out, Adam. Stop holding it inside. We're here for you. Whatever happened out there on that desert with Caine, we don't blame you, no one does. It had to be hell, whatever it was. Tara, your brothers, and I were all here."

"Hell? It was worse than that." Adam thought as his face started to crumble; each and every bit of the horrendous experience replayed itself on the stage of his mind. Tears started streaming down his face as if some unseen hand had finally found a lost key and unlocked the door connected to the invisible wall. Ben dropped to his knees and held his son close as Adam started shaking and sobbing, shocked, but not surprised due to the conversation he'd had with Mr. Caine's son, to hear Adam cry, "Pa! Oh Pa! There was no gold, none at all! The man was insane! He was completely insane!" Tara very quietly stood up and went outside leaving Ben to comfort one very distraught son.

Scene Twenty-Two

Tara was in the room she'd been using packing when Ben walked in. He was horrified to see what was going on. "What are you doing?" he quickly walked over and stood at the foot of the bed. No one had asked her to leave, so why was she?

"Adam doesn't need me anymore." Tara fought to keep any emotion she felt out of her voice as she washappy that Adam was finally talking. From what she could see, Ben and his son had spent a good solid two hours talking. With that being the case, she didn't see where she was needed anymore.

As elated as Ben was that Adam had been able to knock the majority of the wall down, he also knew, by the look in his son's eyes and the way he continued to act, it was not completely down. As long as there was any chance, even the tiniest, that the wall could go back up, he wanted Tara around. "Friends don't leave friends in trouble," Ben repeated the words he'd heard the young woman repeat on many occasions to his son, "Adam's still in trouble. Can't you see that? Right now, do you know what he's doing? Sitting in his chair, Adam is sitting in the chair looking into the fireplace and saying nothing."

Tara was shocked. She thought for sure, once Adam was talking, once he told his father everything that had happened that he'd be just fine. Then again, her mind turned the pages of her own personal history backwards, a past she'd never once mentioned to any of the Cartwrights. The pages turned until they stopped during the worst summer of her life…and the events that had followed when she'd found the nerve to talk to her mother. While she could think on the period of time only with sorrow now, it had not always been that way. Maybe, just maybe she knew what Adam's remaining problem was. She started putting her things away. "I'd like to take Adam on a ride with me, Mr. Cartwright, just the two of us. Would that be okay?" She looked over at the gentleman who had proven to be very much the gentleman. She hoped, someday, she'd be blessed to find such a mate.

Ben smiled from ear to ear. "Of course, it's okay. That is, if Adam wants to. After all, something may still be eating at him only," he said as he looked towards the door, "he's, obviously, no longer in a position to be led around so easily." "And I pray he is never in that position again." He whispered the thought only in his own mind.

Tara understood that and agreed with it. She would never force a man who had gone through the hell that Adam had, and had to fight so hard to "come back", to go anywhere with her, whether it be on a simple ride, to church or any other event that she could think of. Picking up her shawl, Tara smiled at Ben, "I'll go talk with Adam right now. There's plenty of daylight left for a good hour ride, maybe even two.