Turning Tables

Disclaimer: We all know that I am not lucky enough to own Jeff Hardy or anyone else..just Xerxes and the OC(s).

Chapter 12: Making Amends

…...

Jeff and I had been having this ongoing stare off for hours now. My eyes burned and were drooping. My head was pounding and my heart ached so much. I felt like it was coming. The end. The complete, absolute, end of us. He'd get mad at me eventually and say something. God I wanted him to say something. I felt like shit and anything lower and worse than that.

"Please speak to me Jeff." I asked again for the fifth time that night. He sat in silence not speaking. He just looked at me with eyes that never turned away.

"You want me to speak." He said finally.

"Yes." I nodded.

"And what do you want me to say? That I'm ecstatic? Do you want me to run over and kiss you too?" He said lowly.

"Jeff, I just-"

"If you think for one minute that I'm going to embrace the fact that you may be having his baby then it's not happening. I'm not going to pride the fact that you fucked him and didn't use protection. You won't me to smile and be happy for you, but have you ever stopped to think how this is affecting me? I have to live with the stupid decisions you made Xerxes. If that kid is his I'm gonna have to look your betrayal in it's face every day til I can't do it anymore."

I looked at him narrowing my eyes and cursing myself because the eye movement hurt. What the hell did he mean 'until he can't do it anymore'? As far as I'm concerned this was my baby, he didn't have to stay if he didn't want to. I loved Jeff and of course I felt bad about what happened, but I was getting sick and tired of his attitude.

"Jeff stop." I said sharply. "Look, I know I fucked up okay, but I am getting sick and tired of you bullying me about it! I haven't been tip toeing on just egg shells Jeff. I've been tip toeing on glass, I've been running through flames, Jeff I've been doing anything and everything to keep you happy with me, but I don't know what to do anymore!" I yelled as the tears spilled on my flushed cheeks.

"I'm not saying you don't have a right to be mad at me, but dammit won't you just forgive me already? I think I'm suffering just as much as you are." I looked at my left hand and ogled the beautiful engagement ring that he'd given me only hours ago. He'd probably want that back now. I hesitated and brought a shaky hand up to slide the ring off. I held it in my tightly closed fist and walked over to him.

"Jeff." I started. "I love you. I'll always love you. But I can't do this anymore. I'm only human." I kissed his cold cheek one quick time as I sat the ring on the table and left.

…...

I woke up the next morning with a certain longing. A longing for her that I feared would never be filled the same way again. Why the hell did this happen to me? Dammit why couldn't I just be optimistic about it? I've got a 50/50 chance. I should've been happy for her. I reached over and picked up the little object of my affection that she'd given back to me last night. I sighed squeezing it lightly in the palm of my hand.

The delightful aroma filled my nostrils. At least she hadn't left. I set the ring on the nightstand and got out of bed, heading to the shower. When I got out I threw on some clothes and walked down the hall. Xerxes had her hair tied up in a messy ponytail. She bore a plain white tank top and some grey sweatpants. I could see that looked tired and worn out. I'd never seen her so...disheveled.

"I made you breakfast." She said. She carelessly placed a plate full of food on the counter and then began down the steps.

"Aren't you going to eat?" I asked her. She ignored my question and kept on her way. I let her go. No need pressing it. I sat down to my plate. It looked like some kind of oatmeal in casserole form with a side of scrambled eggs and orange juice. I dug in while thinking to myself. What the hell was I going to do? I was pissed with her, but it was so hard to stay that way. I didn't want to lose her. I just needed to compromise.

'No. You just need to balls up and get the fuck over it.' Rowan said.

'Thanks for the comforting words...really helpful.' I thought sarcastically.

'Jeff, I've always been an honest man no matter how brutal I choose to be about it. You're so stuck on Heidi that you can't move on. Don't be that person who dwells on shit that's not going to change...especially if you have the power to change it but won't.'

'If I changed everything bad that happened to me then I'd be a man with no life experience. Don't wanna live that way.' I said.

'Then suck it the fuck up, be a man, and claim your woman. Hold her and kiss her, tell her you love her and that things will get better.'

'When the hell did you become soft?' I huffed.

'She's the soul keeper of my soul mate. Of course I want you two back together.'

'Isn't someone selfish?' I asked the warlock.

'Selfish? Me? Yes, but look who's talking. Using such an abused and innocent soul just so you can have a crown. We're equals Jeff.'

…...

Tessa and I were at the shop painting the walls. We'd both decided that if any change happened it'd just be something we could do without tearing down stuff. I was glad to have Tessa in this with me. Owning half of the business. It would really come in handy when it came time for me to have the baby.

"So." Tessa said. "You haven't said a word to me since we got here. It's my turn to question what I did wrong." I sighed. I was such a jerk. I'd been neglecting Tessa and now she felt like it was her fault.

"It's not you Tess. I just-I'm so tired. Jeff and I were up really late last night."

"Forget I asked." She said smirking.

"No, it's not like that. I mean it-it started out like that. He proposed to me and we made love and then...I told him I was...pregnant." I could feel these God forsaken tears again. "Then I told him he might not be the father." I had to stop painting for a moment to breathe and pull myself together.

"Oh my." Tessa said. She was at a loss for words and I couldn't blame her.

"How did I get so low Tess?" I asked. "And the why the fuck do I cry so much?!" I yelled getting angry with myself. I hadn't realized it until I pulled my hand back, but I'd appeared to have punched a hole in the wall.

"Dammit." I said looking at my hand. It didn't hurt. It was just dusty.

"Sweetheart it's okay. You're just frustrated and you don't know what to do with yourself right now. You're hurting." She said hugging me immediately.

"I don't even wanna talk about it right now." I said. "I just...I'm gonna go get some spackle and stuff to fix the wall." I told her. I was half dazed and still staring at the hole. How had I of all the weak people in the world managed to make that.

"Actually, I think maybe we should go see Mr. Keinz." Tessa said. Well this was strange. It wasn't a school day. It was going to be awkward seeing him outside of class.

"Why?" I asked her.

"Xerxes you just punched a hole in a wall. A very thick wall. You're strong Xerx, but not that strong. I think maybe you're getting your full powers finally."

…...

I was right. It was weird seeing Mr. Keinz outside of school. His house was big and on private land like ours...like Jeff's. Tessa smiled as she stared at me. We sat in silence in the study as we waited on Keinz to return to the room. I was so nervous. I knew he was a teacher of magic, but I didn't see how he was going to help me. Did I even need help?

"Relax." Tessa said placing a hand on my knee. I nodded at her and we both looked at the door as it opened. Mr. Keinz entered carrying a food tray with three mugs on it. He sat it down on the table and sat across from us.

"I'm glad you girls came to me." He said offering us each a cup. "It's tea." We accepted our cups and thanked him. I sipped on the tea before setting it in my lap.

"I don't understand why I'm here exactly. No offense or anything." I admitted.

"Well, I'm no fool Xerxes, I know that you're having a slight difficulty with your sponsors right now so they won't be of any use to you. Who's the next best person to turn to?" He said. So I guess he had a point there. Jeff hated me and wouldn't speak to me and Lucas was unable to speak. They were useless to me right now.

"So what happens now? What do I do?" I asked.

"Now, we perform your ritual." He told me.

"Ritual?" I asked. Tessa nodded next to me.

"Everyone goes through it at some point. It's to bring forth the magic you possess. Or, if you're a vampire like me then it's to help shed your baby layer. To become a full fledged vampire." She explained.

"Okay. How does this ritual work?" I asked them.

"We'll set you up in a room. You'll be on a table with white candles all around you. We will call forth your magical spirit. It's a very simple thing, but before you go off the deep end please do understand, we don't associate these rituals with satanism at all. It's just a way to help process the magic or shedding easily." He said. I had to admit I was a little worried about satanism being tacked to this, but I guess it was a little comforting knowing it wasn't. I loved God and I always would.

"When does this happen?" I asked.

"It can happen either today or tomorrow. I'll do it during class if you like. The other students can go to the field and spar. Either way it has to happen soon. Holding it off just makes it more difficult for you." Keinz said. I really wasn't looking forward to this today. It also sounded like an event that I'd want Jeff there for. I'd try for tomorrow. Plus I wasn't feeling good. I had nausea like a bitch.

"I have some questions for you." He said. I nodded. "How have you been feeling lately? Have strange things been happening to you?" I sat and pondered this question. Surely he didn't know I was pregnant and I'm almost positive those feelings had nothing to do with this...I hoped.

"Well, ever since I got this amulet...I've been hearing a voice. She talks to me a lot. Pretty annoying. My head started hurting then too and hasn't stopped since, plus my vision has been getting extremely good. Too good for comfort." Mr. Keinz nodded at me.

"The voice you here is Valkyrie. She's trying to communicate with you. You're headache is probably a side affect from all the stress, but the eyesight increase is definitely something. Who knows, maybe after the ritual you'll find out you can see things everyone else can't. Or that you can see through thick objects."

"Like walls?" I asked. He nodded. So that was pretty cool. "Mr. Keinz, thanks for helping me, but I think I'm going to wait til tomorrow. I just don't wanna have to do this alone." I told him.

"Of course, I understand. Just call me if you change your mind. I'll hear you." He winked at me and I smiled back at him. He was always my favorite teacher. He was so nice and calm about everything. Tessa and I stood and I took her hand in mine. I let out a neutral breath of air and blinked us away. We were at Tessa's house. I'd rarely even been here, but I enjoyed the times that I did come. Plus, I didn't want to be around Jeff so he could continue to bully me. The less I was there, the less he could.

…...

"So when is the paternity test?" Taeler asked me.

"Tomorrow after she gets out of school. I won't be here." I said. Taeler and I were at the gym. I'd decided to call her up and hang out with her so I could take my mind off of Xerxes, but all she'd done while we were here was talk about her.

"I'm dead positive you're the father. You have to be, you and her have had sex more times than she and Lucas." She nodded.

"It only takes one time. You being a female should be saying that to me." I chuckled.

"Jeff. If it turns out that she's pregnant with his baby, they may not let you two marry in the council." Taeler panted. She had a point. If the council got word of her carrying a spawn that didn't belong to me, they won't let us get married there. My father may be the king, but it wasn't a vampire thing. It was a warlock thing. Like the holiest of ceremonies for them. He wouldn't go around that.

"Then again maybe we don't have to marry there." I said slowing coming down from the pull-up bar.

"Well I mean, it is the twenty first century, and I don't think Xerxes will be completely down with that type of ceremony anyways. She might want something modern." Taeler said pulling-up.

"That is if we're still getting married." I reminded her as I pulled back up.

"Oh yea. Right. Just talk to her. I'm sure she'll forgive you." Taeler flashed me a quick smile and then dropped to the ground.

"C'mon time to hit the mills." She said. I nodded and followed her over to the long row of treadmills. I always hated these things. If I wanted to run, I'd do it myself.

"I have to fix this before tonight is over." I told her.

"Oh I know you do. And you will. Just sit her down and explain to her why it was so hard, be gentle and nice about it, then tell her you're over it." Taeler said.

"You think she'll listen?" I asked.

"I think we're going to have a modern wedding." She said almost out of breath. Working out with Taeler was hilarious. I didn't usually lose my breath doing anything, but she always did and it was hilarious. That reminded me, I still had to address what happened last night before all the bad crap.

"So uh...I had a heartbeat for a very brief moment last night." I confessed. I turned my head and watched Taeler's smile grow and her eyes widen...and then she fell of the mill and rolled on the floor a bit.

"Are you okay?" I asked going to check on her.

"Yea I am!" She said despite the nose bleed. "Jeff this is great!" I took a hold of her arm and pulled her from the floor.

"C'mon I think it's time to go." I insisted.

"Jeff. A heartbeat." She whispered. "She must really mean a lot more than we thought. It's final. You can't let her go now." I grabbed our bags and put her towel to her nose while she continued blabbing.

"Taeler I hear you and your point is well taken." I told her. "Can we please just worry about getting out of here and stopping your nose bleed."

"Why in such a hurry? I've bled around you before. You handle it fairly well. I never told you about that one guy. Christopherson. Yea. He jumped at me when I cut my cheek."

"Actually you did tell me, I just didn't care that much. No offense."

"Whatever." She said as we reached the car. "So what's with the rush then?"

"I've been craving lately." I admitted starting the car up.

"Really? You haven't...killed anyone have you? I did hear there was a body found last week. It was shot, but still."

"No Taeler. I haven't done it..yet." I said.

"Yet?" I nodded at her.

"I can't just ignore it and it's not going away. Animals aren't cutting it anymore."

"So who are you gonna eat?" She asked me.

"Haven't thought of that yet. I'll find someone. Don't worry." I told her.

"Too late."

…...

Eventually I'd left Tessa's house and went to Mercy. I was sitting with Lucas. He'd had some good news. He could talk again. His voice wasn't booming, but it was kicking. He was so happy and he couldn't wait for the paternity test. I was happy to be around Lucas, at least he cared. At least he showed some excitement.

"So how did Jeff react?" He asked.

"He wasn't thrilled. We got into a fight." I told him.

"He didn't hit you did he?" He asked me.

"No. He just yelled at me." I stood up moving around the little room. I played with some of the flowers Lucas had received.

"Xerxes, you need to stop letting him treat you that way." Lucas sighed.

"I told him to stop bullying me Lucas, don't worry." I reassured him.

"So just because you tell him to do something now he does it? Xerx I know my brother. He isn't that easy to push over he-"

"Lucas. I can handle myself okay, stop trying to always be my savior and everything else. You are just my friend and that is it. Jeff is...he's my boyfriend Lucas. The relationship is between he and I, not you, me, and him." I hated talking to Lucas that way, but he needed to understand that this wasn't a three way.

"You're right." He said after while.

"Lucas I'm sorry I just-"

"Maybe you should go." Great. Now I'd pissed off someone else.

"Right. I'll talk to you later I guess." I told him. He didn't say bye or anything. Just stared out of the window. I left shutting the door behind me quietly. I felt so bad now.

As I was walking to the elevator to go checkout in the lobby I saw her again. The same girl who glared at me in the elevator the first time I came here. She was a beautiful girl. I wondered why she hated me, I wondered why she came here so often. Did she have a friend or family here? Most likely. Maybe her boyfriend was here. She saw me and of course glared at me again. I decided to talk to her. Ask her what her problem was...other than the obvious. She had no reason to hate on me after all. She was just like everyone else, getting wrapped up in shit that didn't involve her.

"Hey!" I called walking speedily up to her. The girl turned around and looked at me with piercing pink eyes. You wouldn't think pink eyes were piercing, but she made it work.

"What?" She asked me.

"Do you have a problem with me? Every time you see me, you glare at me." I said confronting her.

"You wanna know what my problem with you is? Ask your boyfriend." And that was all she said before disappearing into a puff of dust. Ask my boyfriend? What the hell did Jeff have to do with anything?

…...

I had cooked dinner since Xerxes hadn't come home. I thought maybe she'd just be a little late. It was almost midnight. I got a little relieved when I heard the door open and shut. Then I heard her bedroom door do the same thing. If I wanted to talk to her I was gonna have to make the first move.

'Good luck wimp.' I ignored the asshole in my head and knocked lightly on her door.

"Go away. I'm sleeping." I heard. I rolled my eyes entering the room. She turned and scowled at me.

"What the fuck, I said I was sleeping!" She exclaimed.

"You don't look like your sleeping to me." I said.

"Well I was about to take a shower and you're aggravating me. What do you want now?" She asked.

"Xerxes we need to talk." I said sitting on the couch.

"There's nothing to talk about anymore." She said.

"Yes there is. Xerx please. I don't wanna argue. I just want to sit down and have a reasonable conversation with you." I told her.

"Can it at least wait til I get out of the shower?" She said.

"Xerxes." I said adding some firmness to my voice.

"Fine." She huffed. She sat on the opposite end of the couch and stared ahead of her. My eye twitched and I had to force myself not to roll it. I scooted closer to her and played with her hair.

"Don't touch me." She said.

"Xerxes please. I'm sorry okay."

"You can't just apologize to me whenever you want sex. It doesn't work that way."

"Well that's not what I'm doing. I really am sorry. For bullying you. For not being happy about the baby. I'm sorry for calling you out of name. I'm sorry for hitting you. I'm sorry for embarrassing you in front of Spud. I'm sorry for attacking Lucas. I'm sorry for everything." I said truthfully.

"I can understand you being hurt, but you went overboard." She said still not looking at me.

"Alright. Look, I want you to imagine that you were in my shoes. That you once had a fiance who ran off with some loser while you were waiting at the alter. Then you met someone who promised not to do that, not to cheat...and then does it and winds up having a kid that might belong to someone else." I told her. I could see the look of sadness on her face.

"Every time I say sorry you reject it." She said shaking a little.

"I know and I was wrong. We were both wrong, but I don't wanna fight anymore." I told her. "I want us to be happy together. I still want us to be a family." I held out my palm to her and conjured up the ring.

"You still want me to marry you?" She asked.

"Of course I do." I whispered kissing her cheek. "We're gonna have your dream wedding."

"Really?" She said picking it up. I laid my head against her cheek and nodded.

"I promise."

"Can we have doves fly when we kiss?" She asked.

"You can have anything you want. You even get a crown." I told her.

"A crown?"

"Xerxes, by the time you marry me you're going to be a queen." She turned to face me resting her forehead against mine. I pulled her into my lap wrapping my arms around my waist.

"Jeff, yes, I'll still marry you. I'll be your wife and tonight I want you to make love to me the way a king does to his queen."

…...

A/N Okay, sorry for the long time update! I had a crap lot of stuff to do and a bit of writers block. At least Jeff and Xerxes are finally on the same page! Tomorrow Xerx goes back to school and you know what happens after that! Who do you think the father is? Read and Review for me guys! Love you!