*dumbfounded* ~seriously~

Wow, I can hardly believe the popularity of this fic and all I can say is...THANK YOU! Thank you ALL! I'm really inspired by every review, every fav, every visit! I'm so impressed. I can only hope this fic continues to hold your interest!

This is going to be my standard opening from now on. There may be some interesting news added at a later date, that will come directly after this line however so that you can skip anything you're not interested in reading!

A forever thank you and credit for her ideas goes out to Litahatchee (specifics to be mentioned at a later date ^_~) and her wonderful story Night Fire. Go read it. It is WONDERFUL and she has permitted me to use some of her ideas in this story. Trust me it will be amusing. But if you are confused about something, go read that fic it will probably clear it up real quick. Other then that you'll just have to accept what's going on as is and understand that it is all based on something, somewhere. Credit is given where it is due so long as I know that credit is due (ie I didn't come up with an idea on my own that someone else also came up with~hey, it happens)

Also a forever thank you to FORD B. my beta reader. You make writing easy!

Any further notes shall be posted at the end of the fic. Enjoi!

Journal entry; new awakening

So, last thing I remembered was tearing hand fulls of wires from something. Really can't say I remember what, just that I was pulling them and that it was important.

When I woke up in the med bay once again I can't say that I was relieved. Last time I was here wasn't so wonderful and this time I hurt. A lot. Honestly I could hardly move from all the aches, bruises and scrapes. I could only hope that nothing was broken because I really couldn't tell at this point but it kinda felt like it.

What did I do? And why do I feel like I'm going to pay for it?

~Aurian Fae

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Aurian groaned loudly and instantly regretted it as spikes of pain radiated out from her chest. Looking around revealed nothing more then it had the last time she had been in this situation aside from the barely noticed fact that she was not restrained...and music. Someone had brought in a small radio and had left it on an alternative station turned down low. It was very comforting. Especially over the sound of the monitors that practically surrounded her.

"What is all this?" She grumbled softly trying to ignore the pain. There was a heart monitor, she recognized that, and the IV unit with it's little dosage device hooked up to it but there were two other machines she had no clue what they were or what they were for. One that had several bright colors all over the screen that, while pretty to look at, made no sense to her at all and the other one didn't have a screen at all but continually emitted a soft tone.

A faint tapping at the door alerted her to someones presence and she turned to look, that hurt too. "Aurian?" A soft female voice called, she feared it was the same nurse as before and dreaded being under her care once more only this time much less able to defend herself. "Are you awake?" Aurian was relieved to see that this was a different woman, slightly heavier, slightly taller and with a bright smile on her face.

"No." Aurian groaned.

The woman laughed and it was a nice sound. She was someone who liked her job and liked people. "Good to see you have your sense of humor still!" She came to stand beside Aurian's bed, glanced at the monitors and took her wrist in her hand to check her pulse. "You look better then you did when you came in here."

"I can only imagine what that must have looked like, cause I feel like Hell." Aurian spared her bare arms a once over. They were scraped and bruised...and burnt. "What happened?"

The woman looked shocked by this question and she looked at Aurian with sheer disbelief, "Don't you remember?"

"Not really."

"You got off the base..." The lady hesitated, "You remember that at least?"

Aurian thought, she had wanted to go looking for something. What had it been? At any rate she had snuck into the back of a truck. "Yeah, I remember that." She thought some more, what had happened? She hadn't stayed in the truck. That was the start of all these scrapes, she had jumped out.

"Do you remember what happened after that?" She was rubbing Aurian's hand and it reminded her of the way her mother use to rub her back after a bad dream. Why did she have the rising feeling of dread?

'Think...' That simple word brought back something...she had been yelling at herself, 'Think Aurian, think!' She had been trying to get away but had no way out so she had... "Oh. Barricade. Did I really attack Barricade?"

The nurse's face relaxed into something between approval and relief, "Yes, hun, you did. You ended up getting a pretty bad concussion and severe chemical burn. We were worried you wouldn't wake up."

"That's why I hurt so bad, huh?" She looked over her arms again at the odd spiderweb burns covering them and wondered where else it had gotten.

"Well, that and all the bruises and scrapes. Must have been some fight...I mean, not that I would expect anything less after taking on a giant robot." The woman patted Aurian's hand before letting it go. "I guess I should go get you something to eat, you're probably starving!"

"How long was I out?"

"About two days."

"Oh." Aurian felt a heaviness in her stomach. Two days? She'd never been unconscious for more then a few hours before and the notion of days made her uncomfortable. "What happened?"

"Not too much. That medical bot has been trying to repair the one that attacked you. They're hoping it will have some information on others."

"Is he okay?" Why did she care? He had just tried to kill her! "I mean, is he online?"

"I guess so." The nurse shrugged. "I honestly don't have a lot to do with the robots, I'm here for the humans." Aurian got the feeling that she didn't really like the idea of the giant aliens but she didn't seem offended by them either. "I will be back in a few minutes with something to eat, okay?" She asked from the door as she was on her way out. "You want anything specific?"

"Something actually edible?" And the nurse thought she was kidding...

Aurian could see bits and pieces in her head but could not put together everything that had happened. She remembered climbing, she remembered falling at one point. "He is going to destroy me." She lamented to herself. "Well like Hell I'm going to lay here and wait for him to come find me." Aurian threw her covers off and regretted the motion as her entire body erupted in burning pain. "Oh, that's where else..." She gritted through her teeth and turned her attentions to all the things attached to her instead. She knew how to turn off the heart monitor and the IV unit but the other two? Well, she was just going to have to hope they didn't have alarms on them.

A few minutes later had her standing on shaky legs but refusing to give into the ache that was her entire body. "It's not so bad." She told herself determinedly. Granted that each step brought waives of pain but they were growing less in intensity with each step so she was pretty okay with that. She was relieved to find that the door was not locked and she was free to go, she was not impressed however that she could not find a scrap of clothing to wear aside from the drafty gown she was in. "What did they do with my cloths?" She griped even as the image of rolling across the desert played clearly for her in her mind. "They could have at least brought something from my bag." Another waive of pain shot through her causing her to pause, "Of course, then they would have had to assume I was going to get up anytime soon."

On the other side of the door was a hall, simple and normal just as any hall should be so she followed it out and to the left. Why left? Why not. The last time she had been in this facility her room had opened up directly into the area where the Autobots could access so she knew that she wasn't expected to meet with them any time soon at least. She did count her blessings however when she saw a rack of freshly cleaned, or newly delivered, scrubs. She honestly didn't care which way it went as long as she could find a pair of pants. Pilfering a set of suitable military colored scrubs she ducked into another room, thankfully empty and set about the task of dressing herself, a whole new experience when your entire body felt like a crispy chicken skin.

Feeling more confident in her much less breezy outfit Aurian continued down the hallway. She wasn't sure where she was going, or even that she should be going but she despised hospitals and felt completely helpless laying there. So on she went.

Stepping outside was pure bliss. The warmth of the sun actually eased the pain in her skin and the breeze helped ease the stress of her body. With a deep, thankful breath she set about finding something she knew, somewhere she could hide herself away and think.

"Aurian!" The voice caught her completely off guard and was entirely too loud. "It is good to see you up already." Ironhide came to stand in front of the woman. He had apparently seen her from halfway across the base and had come to be next to her in only a few short strides. "We were concerned that you might have been too badly damaged."

"Ha! Like some Decepticon is going to take me out!" She bolstered. That Decepticon nearly had taken her out and very likely would once he got the opportunity.

Ironhide was amused by the bold statement and laughed, "A being after my own spark! I must say I was impressed by the damage you inflicted. For such a small being with no weapons you are fearsome."

"Yeah, it's called fight or flight. You should learn it, all humans do it."

"Hmm." The bot was now looking at her skeptically, "You do not appear to be well."

Aurian could hardly hold back her smart retort, he didn't need to know she was in pain. "I'm fine. Looks worse then it is."

"Still, perhaps Ratchet should..."

"NO!" She shivered involuntarily. "I don't want him scanning me. I don't like it."

"Hmm." Ironhide couldn't help but agree. He found the CMO's scans rather unpleasant himself. "Where are you going, I will take you there." He offered instead.

"Oh," Aurian looked around. She hadn't decided where she was going to go, just that she wanted to be away from everyone. "I really don't know. I just wanted to move around I guess. I don't like being idle."

The faint sounds of gears shifting took Aurian by surprise and she turned just in time to watch the large mech fold down into his Topkick alt mode. "Perhaps a drive is in order then?"

Giggling like a school girl Aurian approached the truck, further pleased by the self opening door. "If you don't mind..." she hesitated before climbing in.

"I wouldn't offer if I didn't want to." Was Ironhide's explanation. "Besides, I'm off shift and have nothing better to do."

Aurian took hold of the door and prepared to heave herself within. 'This is going to hurt...' she moaned to herself. "How is there an off shift when there's only five of you?" She asked honestly, not thinking of what those words could mean. She only marginally regretted it as the truck seemed to sigh deeply because it was enough of a distraction for the Autobot to not notice the whimper of pain as she finally got the nerve to lift herself into the cab. "I'm sorry. I didn't think about it."

"No, you haven't said anything wrong. We each have an off shift, orders of Ratchet and Optimus. They are concerned for our processor stability." The truck shut his door after the woman was fully inside and revved his engine before rolling across the pavement.

"So for sanities sake then."

"Something like that."

"I guess it makes sense. I mean it wouldn't be good to be stuck always working. Everyone needs some personal time." Aurian stumbled over her own words, "Am I taking up your personal time? Cause I don't want..."

"Aurian," Ironhide spoke in a soft, though gruff tone, "you worry too much."

"Ha!" She shouted, regretting it but still continuing, "this coming from you of all mechs? The only other one that statement would be more inappropriate from is Red Alert!"

Ironhide was quiet for a moment before replying, "I don't know why I continue to be surprised by what comes out of you."

"Because you still don't believe me."

"I have little reason to doubt you any longer."

"Oh, is that all it takes? Nearly being squished by a Decepticon?" She crossed her arms angrily over her chest, it was all for show. "You could have just told me and we could have avoided all the evil glares."

At this the large mech laughed, "Somehow I doubt you would have hunted out a Decepticon purposefully."

"Try me." Aurian snarled.

The two fell into silence for some time, Aurian trying to ignore the pain in her chest from her exertions and Ironhide content to just travel. Once they passed through a gate that Aurian had never before seen she found herself wondering and could not keep to herself any further. "Where are we going?"

"Does it matter?" Ironhide asked, though it did not sound like a challenge.

Aurian sighed, "No, I guess not. As long as I don't have to talk to anyone."

"Agreed."

"How's Sides holdin' up?" She wondered aloud.

"What do you mean?"

She shrugged, not entirely sure if the mech turned truck could even see her, "I guess I thought that without his twin nearby he'd be struggling a little. I mean I don't know how all that works but it always seemed implied that twins didn't survive well when separated."
Ironhide didn't answer for a while. He didn't truly know what to say. The woman had hit the proverbial nail on the head and he wasn't sure how to explain it. Then again, perhaps she already knew, she knew so much already. "He is feeling the absence." He finally answered.

"Poor guy. I can't even imagine what it must be like. I know what it's like to be separated from people you care about but to feel it like that? Humans aren't built to be able to withstand that kind of suffering." She sighed and sank as deeply into the soft seat as she could, "I guess I'm thankful for that."

"From my observations I would have to say that humans are built to withstand a great deal more then they would appear." A soft rumble rolled through the cab and Aurian gathered that he was laughing quietly, "You for one are an outstanding example of that."

"Humph, don't say that." She hated compliments, of any kind. Though a tiny part of her was screaming with glee that the weapons specialist would think of her in such a way. "I'm not special, I'm spiteful. There's a difference."

"Hmm, my calculations would show that by comparison and by all logic, that 'Con should have won your battle with little effort."

"Shows what you know."

"I'm simply stating that you clearly showed how appearances are not all to be considered in battle. I am rather stunned by the results of your efforts. How did you know what to attack to immobilize him?"

"Know? I didn't know anything! I just grabbed and ripped...Gods...what did I do?" Aurian felt horrible for what she had done. She wasn't one to want to take a life. "Is...is he going to be alright?"

"Why does it matter?" There was a cool tone to Ironhide's voice and quite frankly it pissed Aurian off.

"Because even if he's a bad guy he's alive and one of very few of your entire race that's left! That's why!" She slammed her fist against the dash with the sheer force of her anger. Life was precious no matter who's it was. "Damn it Ironhide, he's alone and didn't know where to go. Why else would he have come all the way out here when it would have been a thousand times easier, Hell, smarter for him to have remained laying low where you guys couldn't find him?"

Ironhide didn't answer, couldn't answer. He hated the Decepticons without exception but her words were not all wrong. Why would a lone Decepticon take a chance against the Autobots? He was grossly outnumbered, out gunned, out everything! There was no logical reason for it.

"Well? Aren't you going to say anything?" Aurian's voice had grown soft and shaky, her latest outbreak bringing more waives of pain. Physical and mental.

Ironhide's engine rumbled angrily, "I thought you didn't want to talk." He grumbled.

Aurian just curled on herself, laying down as well as she could on the bench seat. Suddenly she was very tired. And hot. And she hurt. "Do you have an air conditioner?" She asked almost pathetically. There was no response but cool air was soon blowing on her, "Thanks."

Though it seemed they were traveling in silence, Ironhide was monitoring the woman within his cab. He had not believed her when she said she was fine and had offered her solace with him concerned that left to her own devices she may end up in danger with no one to aid her. It appeared his suspicions were correct. He turned back toward the base, he had had no destination in mind but now that the woman seemed in need he knew he had to seek out Ratchet.

"Hide," she groaned, "I don't feel so well."

"I know." He tried to keep the ride as smooth as possible while picking up as much speed as he dared.

Barreling through the Autobot gate and into the base, Ironhide paid little attention to who was in his way, so long as they moved and quickly. Aurian's breathing had become hitched, something he knew from Will meant that she was in a great deal of pain and trying not to make any noise about it. His recklessness drew attention, thankfully exactly the attention he was looking for as Ratchet came down the hall angrily.

"What is the meaning of this Ironhide? You could have hurt someone!" Ratchet demanded, finding it somewhat curious that the mech was in his alt mode driving through the base.

"Not much choice." He offered, "I need a human to help Aurian out of my cab."

"What?" Ratchet was stunned to say the least, "Why is she in your cab, she's supposed to be in the..."

"She left. I found her and now she's in need of aid. Anything else you want to ask or are you going to help?" Ironhide pushed past the baffled medic, searching for someone, anyone and was relieved when he saw Chief Master Sergent Robert Epps. "Rob!" He drove up to the man, "I need your assistance." He popped open his door before Rob could question what the mech would need of him and he saw the limp form within.

"Oh, man! What happened to her?" Rob pulled the woman from Ironhide's cab, noticing the chilled temperature of the enclosure and the heat of the woman's skin.

"That we can find out later." Ratchet interrupted, "Right now I think it's prudent to treat her as soon as possible."

"Right!" Rob agreed as he lifted the woman into his arms.

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Journal entry continued; CMO

Okay, so here's the deal. Don't make your doctor mad. Especially not when he's a military doctor and even more so if he stands over four times your height and more then that if he's a robot.

Just sayin'.

Another note...did you know Sideswipe was actually afraid of doctors? Huh? Who'da guessed. The things you learn...

~Aurian Fae