A/N: Buckle up for a load more angst, ladies and gents! Estarossa's mental state is about to go horribly downhill, poor thing~ The culmination of which will be seen in future chapters.
First line lifted directly from a Peppa Pig episode, because this is the sort of stuff you have to watch/read when you have children.
Chapter 12: In Which Merlin Goes Too Far And Something Cracks
"And so the princess, the dragon, the budgie and the frog all lived happily ever after," Elizabeth said serenely as she smoothed over Estarossa's hair, her fingers gently brushing against his forehead. The small demon sighed and snuggled into Elizabeth's side, enjoying the hug she gave him in return.
"Would you like another story?" Elizabeth asked. "We have time."
"Yes please!" Estarossa found himself grinning as Elizabeth pulled out another book. There were some benefits to being a child.
"Did your mother read you stories?" Estarossa asked, his voice slightly muffled as he fought off sleep. He realised his mistake straight away as Elizabeth stiffened at his side and he looked up with something approaching horror on his features. In the moment, he had forgotten who her mother was.
"That depends, I've had quite a few mothers," Elizabeth said with a forced laugh. "The queen of Liones was a wonderful mother. She used to read to me and my sisters all the time." Estarossa left it at that, squeezing his arms more tightly around Elizabeth by way of apology. She seemed to understand, and nuzzled the top of his head with her cheek as she settled more comfortably on the bed, preparing to read the next story.
"Once upon a time…" Elizabeth began before, suddenly, a loud crash and an indignant scream interrupted her words. Estarossa frowned; it sounded like the ruckus was coming from Merlin's lab and the scream definitely belonged to Ban, who should have been in bed but obviously wasn't.
"You have to go, don't you?" Estarossa asked, his voice quiet and small. Even as he emotionally prepared for Elizabeth to depart he clung to her more desperately, his fingers digging into her side slightly. It's completely unfair. We all have storytime with her, that's the rule. Now it's supposed to be my turn. And this happened yesterday too. And the day before.
"I'll send Meliodas to tuck you in. I'm so sorry, Estarossa, I really am." Elizabeth gave him a brief, hurried kiss on the forehead before practically flying out of the room and running upstairs, her feet thudding on the steps in her haste. Seconds later, Estarossa heard Elizabeth's stern voice drifting through the ceiling. Evidently Merlin had done something pretty bad. Again.
A minute or so later, the door opened and his eldest brother entered the room, a sheepish expression on his boyish face. "I'm sorry champ. Merlin has… well let's say Ban looks a bit different now, and so does Zeldris though he was too cross to even make a noise. Elizabeth had to sort it out, I'm afraid. Merlin wouldn't listen to me…" The heartbroken timbre with which these words were said was enough to make Estarossa's blood boil with rage. He would make Merlin pay for upsetting his brother. Tomorrow. And that's a promise.
"Shall I finish the story," Meliodas asked as he spied the book lying on the coverlet. "Where did you get up to?" Estarossa snuggled into the covers as Meliodas read, allowing the hypnotic words to wash him to sleep. His dreams were unsettled however, a smirking witch featuring over and over again in his nightmare.
The next day at breakfast, Estarossa understood what the fuss of the night before had been about. He did not need to be told. Ban was sporting bright pink hair, the spikes of it standing up proud on his tiny head, and Zeldris, who had no hair at all, was glowering in fury at his plate. Estarossa could not help but snigger at this; his younger brother had always been ridiculously vain where his hair was concerned.
"It will grow back, I promise," Elizabeth said soothingly, and she gave Zeldris a kiss on the cheek. This however did nothing to improve the small demon's mood, especially when Merlin sauntered down the stairs looking for all the world as if nothing had happened. Zeldris immediately got up from the table, breakfast unfinished, and strode out of The Boar Hat without a word or even a glance in Merlin's direction, pausing only to grab a bobble hat as Ban followed him on tiny legs, running like the wind to keep up.
"Merlin!" Meliodas yelled as he came in from the kitchen and his eyes locked on the witch, "You have gone too far this time."
"Meliodas," Elizabeth said soothingly, "we discussed all this last night. We have to put it behind us."
"No, I don't accept that. Her behaviour never changes, she has not even apologised and Zeldris is crosser than I have seen him since… well you know what I mean." Estarossa blanched slightly, remembering the day in Camelot when Meliodas had strode back into their lives, Elizabeth on his arm. Yes, Zeldris had been pretty furious then.
"See, we all do things we're not proud of," Elizabeth said softly.
"Yes, but not over and over again with this much enjoyment," Meliodas grumbled, as he rubbed the back of his head. "We have to stop this!"
"Yes and we will," Elizabeth said serenely. "Merlin, come here!" This last was said with a slight bite to the tone and Estarossa sat up in his seat a little. Next to him, Gowther, who had as usual been completely silent as he devoured a book, pulled his head out of the pages to observe the exchange.
"Arthur is dropping by today, he was going to take you and Zeldris to see the enchanted forest," Elizabeth said slowly and Merlin squealed. "No, wait!" Elizabeth warned as Merlin's eyes shone. "You are not going. Arthur will take Zeldris and Ban to the forest instead."
"What?" Merlin practically yelled. "But… but… I found him, I made him. Arthur can't…"
"You should have thought about that before you messed with their hair," Elizabeth said smoothly, completely unperturbed by Merlin's spluttering. "And Meliodas is right, you have not apologised. You can't because you're not truly sorry. So there have to be consequences. And this is your consequence. You have upset Zeldris and Ban so they get to do something you do not. End of discussion."
"Or you could change their hair back," Meliodas said hopefully. "Seriously Merlin it's a really sore point with Zel. Always has been. Can't you just…"
"Nah, I don't think so. Serves him right for being mean to me. I didn't even know it would upset him that much, that's just a bonus." Merlin floated in the air as she said this, her childish face alight with satisfaction. "His face was so funny!"
"Well, if you won't change their hair back you don't go to the forest. It's that simple," Elizabeth said, and Estarossa could tell she was trying to control her temper. "Now, sit down and eat your breakfast, and no more sassing," Elizabeth warned.
"Grow his hair back," Estarossa hissed as Merlin sat down. "I'm sick of you taking up all of Elizabeth's time. It's not fair."
Merlin laughed nastily as she looked at Estarossa, eyes glowing with mischief as she began to eat her buttered toast. "You poor fool," she said nastily before crunching her teeth into the dry toast. "That's not why Elizabeth doesn't want to spend time with you."
"What are you talking about?" Estarossa said quietly, wanting to yell but finding his blood running cold as he looked into Merlin's smirking face. "What do you mean? Elizabeth loves me."
"Don't kid yourself," Merlin simpered as she concentrated on her toast. "You killed Meliodas remember. In front of her. We were watching it all - I was there - she saw the whole thing. And do you know what she did after you left Mel's broken body and swanned off to destroy Britannia? Well, do you?"
Estarossa tried to reply, but the words stuck in his throat. Elizabeth had seen it? But how? Then he remembered, Ban had shown up and tried to stop him and seemed to have some prior knowledge of what had occurred, so presumably all the Sins had watched the fight, probably courtesy of Merlin. Elizabeth must have been there with them.
"She insisted I teleport her to Meliodas's body, with those swords of yours sticking out of it and his arm sliced clean off," Merlin said with some relish. "She cried for days. You did that to her. To heal his body she had to find that arm, you know. She had to search round Vaisal for hours looking for it. And you think she'd want to spend time with you now? You think she could love you even? You are more of an idiot than that brother of yours."
Estarossa felt his throat tighten uncomfortably as he stared at his plate. Maybe Merlin was right. Maybe Elizabeth really was avoiding him. Maybe that's why she left him alone every night instead of finishing story time.
"Me on the other hand," Merlin said smugly, "she asked me to call her Sis-Sis. We go back millennia. She loves me best."
Estarossa stared at his plate, his tongue refusing to form words. He felt slightly sick, the creeping nausea curdling in his stomach as he swallowed hard. She was right of course. After all he had done how could he have ever hoped that Meliodas and Elizabeth would care about him? He was nothing to them.
"Merlin, you need to be careful about what you say," Gowther said primly, his eyes obscured behind his shining glasses. "You will cause a great degree of upset if you con… con… carry on. People's feelings are not to be played with, you taught me that," the doll added, his book laid down on the table at his side while he gave the witch his full attention. "My creator would be disappointed with you."
"I have said nothing but the truth," Merlin protested as she pursued her lips into a sulky pout. "You were there. You saw what a mess Elizabeth was. Don't tell me you think she's forgotten it. You know enough about memory to know that's not the case."
Estarossa took advantage of the bickering to quietly slip away from the table, creeping up to his room as stealthily as he could. Once there, he leaned against the closed door for a few moments, panic and horror washing through him in waves. What have I done, what have I done, what have I done? Got to get away from here, start again, not make Elizabeth hate me anymore. Gotta run, run, run.
Mind made up, the panic in his chest receding slightly with the formulation of his plan, Estarossa opened his wardrobe, pulling out an old bag from the depths and shoving some clothes in. Then he went to the chest of drawers next to the window and carefully fished out an old sock, where he stored what little money he had. It was not much, just the odd coin or so, and for a brief moment Estarossa considered raiding Zeldris's stash before deciding against it. He would just have to find some way to earn money once he was on the move. He cast a longing glance at the polished wooden sword which was propped up by his bed. He wanted to take it, badly, but as a weapon it was worse than useless and would only slow him down. He'd need something more deadly.
After tiptoeing down the stairs, Estarossa waited, hidden in a cupboard next to the bar where cleaning supplies were kept. Diane and King came down together, sharing a few words with the others before heading outside. Merlin and Gowther left some time afterwards, followed by Escanor, who was mercifully wearing his glasses and from the snatches of conversation Estarossa could hear had apparently agreed to watch the remaining children for the day while Ban and Zeldris were out with Arthur. Once alone, Elizabeth and Meliodas cleaned up the bar, taking a lot longer than they should have done. Estarossa caught himself blushing as he saw Meliodas groping Elizabeth with abandon through the cupboard's keyhole, but although she sort of protested she didn't seem to really mind. The two were about to head upstairs when Elizabeth kissed Meliodas with an unrestrained passion and Estarossa felt his insides twist painfully with his guilt. They had really and truly loved each other, all this time. He should never have parted them, even temporarily.
With the coast finally clear, Estarossa carefully opened the cupboard door and slowly, ever so slowly, made his way into the kitchen. The place looked the same as when Ban had been in charge: the wooden spice rack nailed to the wall groaning with small jars of dried herbs, the black, gleaming stove, the pots and pans left to dry in the stream of sunlight pouring through the window and the knife block on the countertop, Ban's professional instruments sharpened to perfection. Quick as a flash, Estarossa reached up, taking a large knife for protection and a smaller one too. I can use that to make fire, I think, or at least prepare food. Estarossa had lived out in the wilds of Britannia before of course, but not without magic and, being honest, not without the other Commandments to rely on in the event of any problems. Well, you'll just have to learn. How hard can it be?
With a last look round at the place he had begun to think of as home, Estarossa stepped out of the bar, heading at top speed in the opposite direction to Camelot, which lay to the east. He did not want to run into any humans, nor anyone else for that matter. He set a brisk pace, bounding past boulders and wispy birch trees, stomping through meadows dusted with snowdrops and the odd purple crocus. Birds chirruped cheerfully, the sound reverberating through the still air as they searched out seeds and worms. It had rained ( it always rains, stupid Britannia) and, in places, the ground was sodden with squelchy mud, impeding his progress and soiling his trousers. This was particularly the case where he came close to human settlements and the sheep and cows, all squashed together in what looked to be smallholdings, had churned up the mud with their hooves, the vile brown mixture smelling strongly of dung. But for once Estarossa did not care. Every step he took he was a little further away from The Boar Hat and the people he loved and had hurt so cruelly.
This would be so much quicker if I could fly . Estarossa had tried, and tried, and tried some more but despite Meliodas's patient teaching he was no nearer to summoning his wings. Zeldris and Merlin had taken to taunting him occasionally, the pair of them exploring the sky as he remained locked to the land below, gazing up wistfully at their retreating backs. Zeldris has even taken Ban for a couple of rides, the small boy screaming for joy in his arms as they soared up to the sky. He had not complained, swallowing his disappointment, but he had felt left out. Well, maybe if I tried it now - what's the worst that can happen?
With great determination, his face scrunched up with the effort, Estarossa focused on the darkness swirling inside him, waiting for it to travel towards his back. As he felt the warmth of it slip up his spine he pushed at it with all his might, willing it to slide out across his shoulder blades. With astonishment, he felt the black substance push out from him body and, holding his breath, he directed more of the material to swell the small tendrils which had left his form. Slowly, the tendrils grew and thickened, flattening out into two wings and Estarossa felt his hearts soaring in triumph. Experimentally, he beat his wings up and down, patiently working out how to coordinate their actions, before finally pressing down on the balls of his feet and launching himself into the sky.
The rush of cold wind which hit his face as he finally became airborne made his blood surge with excitement. He had finally done it. That will show Zeldris, he thought before remembering that, all being well, he would not see his brother again. The thought caused him some disquiet, and he flapped his wings more firmly, travelling north west with a wobbly gait, but still at remarkable speed. He was miles away from The Boar Hat, out of their way. I hurt them. They are better off without me .
Estarossa flew for hours, the sun rising over his head and scorching his back before sinking again on his left, the orange orb coating the land in splashes of golds and pinks. It meant the weather would be good tomorrow of course and this thought should have cheered him, but with each passing moment he became more and more miserable. His whole body ached from the continual adjustments he had to make to maintain his position in the air and he was seriously cold, the invigorating wind having seeped into his bones to freeze him from the inside out. To top it all off he was hungry, and he cursed himself for not taking any provisions from the bar before he started his journey. Zeldris and Meliodas would not have been so stupid. And, being honest, he missed his family. Surprisingly, it was Elizabeth's face which haunted him the most; her soft, gentle style was decidedly soothing. He would have given anything to be in her arms. Tears fell from his eyes, splashing backwards over his cheeks as he continued to make his way through the sky.
It was the smell that first attracted his attention, the mouthwatering scent of roasting meat which drifted up from somewhere on the ground. Eyes straining to see through the gloam of the twilight, Estarossa spied a building in the distance, the white painted walls shining in the light of the moon. The smell must be coming from there, he reasoned. His stomach rumbled audibly as he let the smell overwhelm him. He would have to stop, there was no way he could pass by without at least making an attempt on the food.
Retracting his wings slightly, Estarossa sailed to the ground. The long journey had helped him master the power of flight, and he easily made the descent, and he set down lightly on the path which led up to the house. Sneaking up to the window, Estarossa took a careful look inside, his eyes locking on two elderly humans preparing their meal. All he had to do was wait for them to go to bed and then sneak in and steal whatever leftovers he could find. Simple really. The humans probably wouldn't even miss the food. Well, they probably will, maybe I can leave them some money. I don't want to upset them and they don't look that well off , Estarossa thought as he took in the threadbare carpet on the hard stone floor, and the battered wooden table and chairs which looked like they had seen better days.
Estarossa was just about to settle down into a hedge until the humans had gone to bed when the door opened, flooding the area with a soft, warm light. The silhouette of a thin woman wearing an oversized shawl stood in the glow, and Estarossa shrank back into the leaves of the shrub as far as he could.
"Come out young man, I won't hurt ya," the woman barked out as she held the door open wide. "I've seen the look in them eyes before. You're hungry, so come eat."
Estarossa stood up cautiously, wishing he could deactivate his demon mark and so pass for human. Once the woman saw who he was, what he was, all chance of a peaceful meal would be gone.
"Come on lad, come on," the woman coaxed more gently, "we won't hurt ya." As Estarossa took some cautious steps forward he kept his eyes locked on the woman's face, waiting to see her expression harden and the hatred creep into her eyes. But her face remained steady, firm but kind as she continued to beckon the young demon into her home.
"Don't you be worrying," the woman said reassuringly as she ushered Estarossa inside. "The war's over now, and you're just a young 'un. No need for upset. Come and eat." As she said this, a wizened old man pushed a plate of food in Estarossa's direction, and the small demon began to devour the meal placed in front of him.
"I've seen this mark before," the old man said gruffly as he examined Estarossa with a piercing gaze, his eyes boring into the demon's forehead. "You belong to that one, the Sin that goes mad."
"John," the old woman said, a bite to her tone. "Leave the lad a bit. Let him eat."
Not needing to be told twice, Estarossa continued to devour the food in front of him, barely pausing until it was gone, worried that it would be taken off him if he gave the humans any room for manoeuvre. When he had finished, the old lady stood up from the table, gesturing to Estarossa to join her.
"Stop here the night, then we'll see what's to be done with ya in the morning. Ya look beat," the woman said kindly as she ushered the demon into a small, dingy bedroom, barely more than the size of a cupboard. But it was warm and dry, if a little musty, a small fire in the hearth casting flickering shadows over the walls. Once he was alone, Estarossa changed into clean clothes and sank into the bedcovers, falling asleep almost immediately, his dreams haunted by images of Meliodas laying on the rough ground, eyes closed and unmoving.
The next few days passed peacefully enough. In gratitude to his human hosts, who unaccountably seemed to have taken a liking to him, Estarossa did his best to help out. He pulled buckets of water from the old well at the back of the house, swept and washed the stone floors of the place and tended the garden as best he could, allowing the old man to show him how to grow vegetables. Every time he tried to leave there was always some reason he could not go, but he did not really mind. It was a pleasant place to spend time. Until he was away from the cacophony he had not realised how terribly noisy The Boar Hat was. At first he had relished the quiet, then it had grated on his nerves, the moreso as he longed to hear his brother's voice and Elizabeth's tinkling laughter. Soon, he carried a permanent ache around in his hearts, a pain which grew a little each day as he went about his work. If he was being honest, he even missed Ban.
Estarossa was pulling up weeds from the path that led up to the house, carefully working between the cracks of the stones, when a shadow loomed overhead. Looking up in surprise, he was alarmed to see two familiar shapes descending down on him, the black feathers which grew out from their arms shining in the light of the sun.
"Estarossa!" Meliodas yelled as he saw his younger brother, who quivered in fear as the Captain set down with some force on the ground in front of him. He hates me, he hates me, he hates me, he … It was only when Meliodas ran towards him and pulled him into an uncomfortably tight hug, almost enough to crush his lungs, that Estarossa began to feel a hope kindling in his breast. A few moments later, a small body worked its way between the two brothers, Zeldris wrapping his small arms around them both as best he could. Estarossa looked down, and was shocked to see what looked like streaks of tears on his younger brother's extremely pale face. He looked really upset.
"I thought we'd lost you," Meliodas whispered, his voice sounding hoarse and broken. "We've been looking for days. Oslo followed your trail for a couple of miles but then it vanished… I thought, I thought…" At this Estarossa felt Meliodas hug him even more tightly, his arms wrapped right around him. And despite the fact that it was awkward if he was trying to breathe properly, he had never felt so safe .
"Gowther told us what happened," Meliodas said a few moments later as he pulled back a little to look into Estarossa's face. "It was all lies. All of it. I love you. Elizabeth loves you. We all do." Estarossa was surprised to find that Zeldris took advantage of the gap which had widened between him and Meliodas to thrust himself more firmly into the space, wrapping both of his arms around Estarossa's middle and burying his face in his shirt. It was then that Estarossa noticed that Zeldris was shaking, and that his head was once more covered in spiky black hair.
"Thank you! Thank you so much," Meliodas said with relief as the elderly couple came out of the house. "If you hadn't sent that message…"
"It's nothin'," the old woman said with a smile as she looked down at Estarossa, handing Meliodas the young demon's bag, which was tied and secured as if ready for travel. "He's been a good 'un. Take care of him."
"We will, I promise," Meliodas said as he squeezed Estarossa's shoulder. "Here, please take this," he added, pulling a pouch from his pocket, the coins within jangling merrily. "It's the least I can do for your kindness."
"Nah, wouldn't dream of it," the old man replied, waving the proffered pouch away. "He's been useful enough."
"Well, the drinks are on us if you ever stop by The Boar Hat." Meliodas reluctantly put the pouch away as he turned towards Estarossa, a smile of relief ghosting over his face. "Will you come back home now? Please? We all miss you, even Merlin I think." Estarossa tried to reply, but his efforts were hampered by a tightening at the back of his throat and Zeldris, who was still clinging to him for dear life. Relief ran through him as he looked at Meliodas's earnest face - he had to be telling the truth - and he eventually managed a nod. Meliodas started to hug him again, and Estarossa wondered if he would ever breathe properly before both his brothers stepped back and he felt their energy surging as they prepared for flight.
"Thank you!" Estarossa called to the humans, finally finding his voice as he and his brothers summoned their wings and took to the sky, the humans waving at them as the sped back to The Boar Hat. Flying home, Estarossa realised just how far he had travelled; it took the best part of the day flying at speed through the piercing cold air to get back to the tavern as they sped past fields and wooded hillsides and the occasional stream. It was dusk by the time the three brothers set down outside the familiar barrel-shaped building, Estarossa's hearts soaring at the extremely welcome sight.
"Estarossa!" Elizabeth called as she ran out of the bar, stumbling slightly in her haste as she pelted down the stone steps and pulled him into a hug. "Thank goodness! We were all so worried! Are you hurt?"
"He's fine. The humans looked after him, thankfully. Now, let's get you inside and warmed up," Meliodas said cheerfully as he turned to Estarossa and Zeldris. "And Estarossa," Meliodas added, his voice lowered and after waiting until Zeldris had run past, "next time come and talk to me, please. I don't want you to worry like that ever again, okay? Elizabeth and I love you all the time, whatever is happening. Got it?
"I thought you were in your room," Meliodas continued, wrapping an arm around Estarossa's shoulders as he pulled him towards the tavern. "It wasn't until lunchtime that we realised you were missing and Gowther explained what had happened. I wish… I'm so sorry. I should have…"
"So you're home," a snarky voice sounded as they entered The Boar Hat and Meliodas whipped round, the obsidian mark staining his forehead in an instant as he looked at the girl. Merlin was floating in the air, swinging her legs back and forth and Estarossa flinched in anticipation of his brother's wrath. He could feel Meliodas's powers crackling like lightning through the room and he braced himself for the coming attack. Before Meliodas could strike however, a rush of black flames shot past them, engulfing Merlin in a ball of dark fire. The witch screamed, the flames extinguishing as she waved her arms and the smoke slowly cleared, revealing a rather indignant looking Merlin, unharmed for the most part but completely bald.
"Zeldris! How could you?" Elizabeth cried as Merlin fled upstairs to her lab, not even casting a glance over her shoulder in her rush to escape. "That was…"
"She deserved it!" Meliodas and Zeldris shouted in unison as they both glared at Elizabeth, identical expressions of righteous indignation in their coal black eyes. At this, Estarossa could not contain himself: after days and days of feeling sad and lost and alone, the sheer relief and the sight of both of his brothers looking so funny was enough to make him lose it completely. Before he knew where he was, he was giggling, then chuckling, then laughing in earnest, Zeldris and Meliodas following his lead as the tension in room slowly drifted away.
"Alright, maybe so," Elizabeth said reluctantly, suppressing a smile as her eyes softened. "Well, come and eat anyway. You must be exhausted. An early bedtime for all of you is called for I think." And with that, she led Estarossa to the table, planting a kiss on his cheek as he sat down to eat.
A/N: What do you think? Have a suggestion, a prompt, more shenanigans? Comment below! We love feedback-the more, the better!