Disclaimer: Nada.
A/N: I apologize for the length of this one, it's longer than the last and usually if they go over 6000 words then I break them in half but this one didn't really have a point where that was possible so here's a 7000 word chapter. Oops. Yes, these chapters seem to get longer and longer. Grrr.....not my fault Jane and Lisbon decided to get all steamy. Enjoy the update...even if you have to read it in pieces. :D
Also forgot to mention last chap, that this is the second part to that one.
Warning: M rated bits towards the end.
It wasn't the sound of the alarm that woke Lisbon, nor the gentle kisses she'd grown used to feeling against her neck when Jane needed her to roll over. It wasn't the sound of Jolisa's cry like the one that had woke her around one o'clock - it was the feel of someone pulling the baby from her arms. She could still feel Jane's heavy arm draped over her stomach, their left hands entwined and resting over Jojo. His chest was still pressing into her back and she could hear his soft snoring in her ear.
On alert once realizing that Jane wasn't the one pushing gently at her arms, she forced her eyes open while tightening her hold on the small body and blinking several times to clear her vision. Doing her best to peer through the darkened room, she saw something she definitely hadn't expected, Jon.
Waking enough to realize that it was her brother leaning over the bed trying to get his daughter, Lisbon felt her stomach flop uncomfortably. Her brother was staring at her, glancing down at her hand linked with Jane's. She could see the questions filtering through his mind as she finally relinquished her hold on Jojo. For some reason, a lump formed in her throat and her eyes stung with tears. She wasn't sure why, she just knew that it was early and this was not how she wanted her brother to find out she was married. She was going to tell him, she'd made up her mind when she'd heard Jane sharing his innermost fears with the baby but this wasn't how she'd wanted to do it.
Jonathan didn't say anything but she knew he'd noticed the wedding rings, there was a flash of hurt across his face. Everything she'd been trying to avoid became unavoidable, everything she'd wanted to save herself and others from feeling had bubbled to the surface.
She watched as he hugged his daughter to his chest, and moved to leave the room. She couldn't let him go without explaining. She couldn't do that after she'd just been talking to Jane about having kids. This was all so real now that it could no longer be hidden. It was easier to keep it a secret from her brothers and people outside her team when things were so messed up between her and Jane but now that they were slowly untangling the web of emotions, she couldn't do it anymore. She should have come clean when he was there the night before to drop off the little one, she should've let him meet the man who was able to convince her to marry.
Gently scooting away and out from under Jane's arm was easier than she'd expected. He was really out and when he started to move, searching for her body, she pushed a pillow in her place. He didn't seem satisfied with it, a little frown tugging at his lips causing a smile to appear on her own. He didn't open his eyes, he wasn't awake but she found it cute that he sort of squeezed the pillow a couple times and then just rolled over, leaving it after his sleeping self realized it wasn't her. A swell of love overtook her body as she quietly stepped away to follow the path her brother had taken. Her marriage wasn't exactly to the point of being something loving and real but they were getting closer. It gave her hope that the day would come when she'd wake up next to him, satisfied and void of all doubts, all questions.
Crossing her arms over her chest, she made it down the stairs just as Jon was packing away the playpen. Jojo was still sleeping soundly, now strapped into her car seat and it took Lisbon a few seconds to find the courage she needed. Nothing ever went according to plan in her life. The situation she'd found herself in surely attested to that fact. With an almost dry whisper, she finally found the words she'd been searching for.
"I was going to tell you."
"S'fine Tess, really you don't have to explain. It's your business." There was an edge to his voice, one that told her he didn't even believe what he was saying and that he was hurt by her keeping it from him.
"Yes I do Jon, please hear me out okay?" Pausing as he dropped the stuff in his hands, she rocked back on her heels and waited until he looked up at her. "I didn't tell you because of the circumstances. It's kind of complicated and I was afraid of what you'd think."
"You're pregnant." Lisbon was startled by his conclusion, taking in a deep breath as he walked over and rested a hand on her cheek. "Why didn't you just say..."
"No, no I'm not pregnant."
"Then what are you talking about?" The part of the conversation she dreaded had just arrived and she closed her eyes to get her head straight before opening them again to tell him the complete and utter truth behind the wedding rings on her finger.
"W-we never dated. We didn't have a relationship at all and then out of the blue he just proposed. It's crazy I know, but I said yes. I thought he was just asking for help." It occurred to her then that she hadn't mentioned who she was married to and the next part wouldn't make any sense. "He's..I, I thought I could make sure he was okay and then break off the engagement but..."
"Wait, 'asking for help'? Who is this guy?"
"Patrick Jane, I think I told you about him before. CBI consultant, family killed by Red John?" Seeing her brother nod was the only confirmation she needed. Unconsciously stepping closer, she grabbed the hand he had yet to take from her cheek and brought it down between them, linking fingers in the process. "I shot Red John, several months ago in a standoff. I thought that by proposing, he was trying to seek comfort or something but he wasn't. We were only engaged three days and eloped on the fourth. I wanted to call everything off but something just wouldn't let me. Things were tense, awkward between us. It's still kinda like that at times but it hasn't even been a month yet."
"I'm guessing this is why you shoved me out the door yesterday?"
"I'm sorry. Things have been hard Jon-Jon, and so messed up. I didn't feel married, I was trying to sort everything out and that's why I didn't tell you. I didn't want you to be ashamed of me for doing this, for marrying a man I'd never dated or anything." Sometime during her speech, her eyes had dropped to watch as he gently squeezed her hand, rubbing his thumb along the back of it. She missed him, missed seeing him and spending time with him.
"Do you love him?" With a light smile, she simply nodded while muttering a soft 'more than he knows'. "Does he love you?"
Another nod and then he was stooping down to her level, forcing her to look him in the eye. She didn't see any shame lingering in his gaze, the hurt was still there but not as strong as it had been, but it was the intensity of his stare that caught her off guard.
"He treat you okay? You said things were hard, he's good to you though right? He doesn't hur...."
"No, he'd never do that. He's amazing, I'm the one who keeps screwing up. I thought he was using me to replace his family. Things are just now getting better, we're finally getting comfortable and then I messed up, he thought you knew we were married. He thought I would at least tell my brothers, it really upset him when he found out that I hadn't. I swear I was going to tell you in a few weeks." Her voice was coming out more frantic than she liked, but she was trying to get everything out at once, trying to prove that she wasn't going to hide it forever.
"Calm down, I think I understand and Teresa," The lump in her throat had yet to go away but she hadn't spilled any tears until her name left his lips and then she couldn't stop them from leaking out. "I can't be ashamed of my big sis, not for this. No one should be ashamed of you when you're in love. I wish you would have told me sooner, I would've knocked louder instead of giving up and using my key."
Wiping her cheek, she smiled and wrapped him in a hug, resting her head against his shoulder. She was the oldest, she was the shortest and it still bugged her but at that moment all she cared about was that she'd worried over something that she should have just opened up about. She'd been terrified that he'd be angry at her but he wasn't.
She stepped back just in time to see him glance over her shoulder, fixing his stare on something behind her. Turning her head, she was greeted with a tired looking, bare chested Jane who was rubbing one eye much like a child would after waking. It had her biting her lip, resisting the urge to drag him back to bed.
"I didn't know...I'll just..."
"Come here." Chuckling at his obvious discomfort, Lisbon extended her hand towards him to usher him closer. It was clear that he was thinking she was still trying to hide her relationship. He apparently hadn't heard the conversation she'd just shared with Jon and judging by the look on his face when he noticed her rings were still in place, he was quite shocked. It wasn't everyday that she managed to surprise Jane. "He knows, I told him everything."
There was a sense of relief that flooded through him as he stepped closer and threaded his fingers through hers. She felt it too.
"Jon this is Patrick, Patrick this is Jonathan." The men shook hands, exchanging a hello as Lisbon leaned into Jane's side. She watched with interest as her brother gave him the once over, sizing him up and squeezing his hand a little too tightly. She didn't say anything, neither did Jane but she gave her brother a look that told him to knock it off when she saw the corner of Jane's mouth twitch.
"Don't hurt her."
"Jon!" Lisbon rolled her eyes at his behavior and remembered exactly why she'd always hated dating. If her little brothers found out, she had to deal with questions, awkward meetings and protectiveness. She was the oldest for crying out loud.
"I won't. Can I have my hand back now?"
"Sorry." Ignoring the men, Lisbon headed over for the car seat, kneeling down to run her fingers through the baby's soft locks. She didn't hear anything else the two men were saying, she focused her attention on the sleeping child and felt her heart clench. She wanted a baby - not at that exact moment but in the future, especially after everything Jane had said before they'd fallen asleep. One day, when things were easier she'd bring the subject up again.
Hand trailing along the chubby cheek, she pressed her lips to the tiny little nose and then straightened back up. She hadn't realized that she'd captured the attention of not only Jane but her brother as well.
"So no little niece or nephew on the way for me to spoil?" Flushing red at the thought, she chose not to mention the fact that she wasn't engaging in any activity that would result in pregnancy. "Soon perhaps?"
Internally groaning at Jon's blunt approach, she shook her head. No not soon. Catching Jane's gaze, she noticed he too had a light dusting of pink covering his cheeks at her brother's words. It was interesting to see, despite her own light embarrassment.
"I better get her home and let you go back to bed." She didn't try to stop him from leaving, bed sounded really good and when he lightly kissed her cheek, she realized she could have saved them all the stress and hurt if she'd just been open and honest from the start. Why did she have to learn things the hard way? He surprised her when he leaned over to Jane, whispering something in his ear that had the blond smiling. She didn't like it, didn't like the fact that they'd known each other five minutes and it seemed as though they were already conspiring.
Feeling her husband wrap an arm around her waist, pulling her tightly into his side, she decided that maybe the grin didn't necessarily mean something sneaky. He did look genuinely happy rather than devious.
"Jon-Jon," Her voice stopped him from walking out the door. "Bring her back to visit us."
Lisbon felt lighter, watching the door close and knowing she wasn't hiding something big, knowing that he'd bring little Jojo back to see them and there weren't any hard feelings. Turning her head into Jane's shoulder, she stepped around to stand in front of him and brought her arms up around his neck. Apparently feeling lighter also made her feel braver.
Soft warm lips landed on her temple, making her hum and push herself closer. When she really thought about it, really really thought it over, it still seemed so strange to be married to Jane but it was becoming less so everyday.
"Let's get you back to bed." She could only grunt in response, words failing her as the fact that she was still tired slowly seeped into her bones. It was only after five, and with their hands linked, she let him lead her up the stairs and back into the bedroom.
Falling onto the mattress, she pulled him along with her which landed them in a heap of tangled limbs and an elbow jabbing her in the ribs. Her head fell against his arm heavily and made him groan but no real damage was caused. Minor bumps that would long be forgotten when they woke. Snuggling down, she draped her leg over his waist and let her eyes flutter closed.
"Patrick," A sudden thought struck. "What did my brother whisper to you?"
"Oh, nothing really. More nonsense about me not hurting you." Lisbon didn't buy it, she knew that wasn't it but she didn't press. She wanted to go back to sleep, she could drill him later. Shifting closer, she let her hand trail up his chest to rest on his shoulder. The bruising was still there, she couldn't see it due to her eyes being shut but she knew the pattern of it by heart and traced the edges easily.
His hands traveled beneath the cloth covering her, resting on her back as his fingers lightly danced down her spine. The touch was soothing, relaxing and had her dozing off just as he decided to strike up a conversation. His voice pulled her back from the bliss of sleep, making her grumble a bit.
"You're not too old." Ignoring the words, she let herself try to drift off again. "You want a baby, it's obvious and you're not too old Teresa. Women have babies at fifty and unless you lied about your age, then you're nowhere near fifty."
"I lied about my age." She couldn't help but tease, it just felt like the thing to do to get out of talking about her fears. She knew she wasn't too old, but she liked to use the excuse as a crutch. Sometimes she even fooled herself, making herself believe that she was pushing it.
"Well then, I married one very attractive cougar." Laughter poured from her lips before she could fight it, spilling into the otherwise silent bedroom. "Seriously though, you're perfect. I'm not talking about right now, we don't need a baby when we're still working everything out but hon, if you want one..."
"Can we drop it, please? Bad enough that Jon thought the reason we married was because I got pregnant." She wanted to sleep, she didn't want to talk about kids anymore. Although her heart definitely noticed the 'hon' he threw into the speech, she was getting a little miffed at him for prodding.
If she were being completely honest with herself, she'd realize her real fear wasn't of getting pregnant or getting hurt on the job. She was using those as masks to cover the real fear, lame excuses that held no merit, same as her mantra of 'I'm too old'. The reason she was terrified happened to involve him. He was what scared her, she was afraid of what would happen.
She was already slightly worried with his constant fretting over possibly losing her, the irrational fear of her just disappearing one day. Though he'd lost one wife so she figured it was kind of normal but to the point of asking your boss to marry you? They needed time, a few years at least maybe more before she'd even begin to entertain the idea of little Janes running around. She just didn't want to talk about it this early, it made her feel as though she were doing something wrong. They hadn't even had sex yet.
With a sigh, she mumbled something akin to 'let me rest or get out' against his skin. Sleep was coming rapidly, pushing away her thoughts when he once again pulled her back to the land of the living. She was seriously verging on throwing him out, it was clear he wouldn't be going back to sleep.
"Grace thinks you're pregnant too. Apparently she saw you emptying your stomach after I fell off that roof, noticed how tired you've looked lately and now assumes we're expecting."
"What? Wait, you told her I wasn't right?"
"Uh, no. I figured you could crush her dreams." If her eyes were open, she would've rolled them but they weren't so she settled for huffing instead. "You didn't tell me you worried yourself sick at the hospital."
"It wasn't important." She didn't wait for his reply, just burrowed into the blankets and let the hand stroking her back lull her. She didn't want to tell him that she'd been so scared of losing him that she'd taken more than just one trip to the bathroom, nor did she mention that she was now dreading a talk with Van Pelt.
She'd been so scared he'd die, so afraid that she'd lost her chance with him even though they'd technically already been married. She hadn't been that scared to lose someone since her father beat Jon half to death, every time she tried to protect her brothers but it wasn't always easy. Sometimes she couldn't, just like she hadn't been able to protect her husband.
In that moment pieces started clicking together in her head. She was just as bad as Jane was. She feared losing him to the point of sounding insane too, she just didn't show it while he did with his touches and soft spoken words. She didn't know why talking about babies had finally pieced the puzzle into place but it had. There was nothing wrong with him, he was human and upon realizing that she lost her excuse. She lost the crutch she'd been using as to why she held off on sleeping with him, why she didn't want to talk about honeymoons or babies and she felt as though her legs had been knocked out from under her. Why hadn't she thought of that before, why'd she always think the worst when it came to him?
The only thing she had left was the fear of him only saying he was okay with a baby to please her, to keep her from leaving. Why did it seem talking about things only made them more complicated?
She felt him squeeze her tighter, shifting to get comfortable and then a sigh left his lips as she faded into the promising darkness of sleep. That sigh told her that he'd probably catch a few more minutes too. She slipped easily into a state where dreams overtook her mind and swept her away to a place that didn't really exist. She'd always been one to dream....
Groggy, disoriented and in pain, Jane forced his eyes to open. He hadn't thought he'd manage anymore sleep after meeting Lisbon's brother but somehow he'd been comfortable enough. It was safe to say he hadn't slept this well in years and he had Lisbon to thank for making it come easier again. He was still an insomniac, generally catching four hours tops but sometimes he could listen to her breathing and fall into a contented sleep that left him feeling great.
He didn't feel so great at the moment though, he didn't like the way the room was brighter now. His shoulder was spasming and he was damp and cold. One glance with tired eyes and he realized his blanket was gone, Lisbon was...she was jerking against him.
He could feel her pajamas - his shirt - sweat soaked and sticky against his skin. Her breaths coming out in sharp short pants, eyes scrunching and brow furrowing as a whimper left her lips. Jane tried to pull her closer but she cried out something sounding distinctly like a 'no' while shoving at him. Her eyes never opened, her hair clung to her neck and forehead, her movements becoming more wild and frantic. She was stuck in a nightmare and he had to save her.
"Hey, Teresa." Whispering only intensified her whimpers making them slightly louder, on the verge of becoming a yelp. Pain shot through his arm as he moved it to stroke over her brow, feeling as though someone had taken a fire poker and jabbed it into him. "Teresa, wake up. It's a bad dream, just a bad dream."
"...no, stop it..." Shaking her gently, trapping her arms with his own, he maneuvered them into a sitting position. The movement jolted her enough to have her eyes fighting to open, the images of her nightmare were probably starting to fade. "M, please..."
"Wake up, come on, it's okay. Everything is okay." She was shivering, eyes flying open and startled green orbs frantically searching the room as she tried to pull out of his hold.
"Let go...let go."
"Whoa, it's me Teresa. Just me." Her hands pushed on his chest forcefully, her eyes still searching for something. He mumbled a curse when her fist hit his shoulder. He moved his hands, bringing them up to cup her cheeks to force her to look at him and when he finally managed to lock gazes with her, he saw how scared she really was.
"Patrick?" Her voice was small, watery and sounding much like a child's. He didn't say anything just stroked his thumbs across her skin and nodded his head. He didn't need to, she could see that he was himself but he felt like he should just to comfort her in some way. As soon as the recognition showed on her face, she was collapsing into him. Moving to straddle his thighs and pressing her face into his cheek. He could feel her tears, could feel the desperation in the way she clung to him. He had expected her to be more shy about it, to hide from him but instead she was gripping him as if he were her lifeline and he easily wrapped his arms around her in comfort.
"Easy, shhh." Her shoulders shook, she shivered and he continually rubbed her back despite the soaked fabric that obstructed the process. Her fingers dug into his back, causing no real pain just pressure as her breath came out labored and harsh against his cheek. She hiccuped, sniffling in the process and he turned to kiss her softly, hoping that it'd help. It did to a degree, the press of his mouth seemed to help her gain some control. "Tell me what it was about."
Several seconds ticked by, she didn't speak and he didn't push her. She laid her head against his shoulder, breathing coming back to a more normal pace, her hands slowly relaxing.
"You didn't make it. You fell off that roof and there was no saving you. I tried, I tried so hard but I couldn't and then it changed, the scenery switched and I was back in high school, back at home with my brothers. He wouldn't stop, he wouldn't stop." There was a pause as she sniffled and shifted in his lap. "I couldn't save him either, Dad or Jon. It was so strange, everything kept switching back and forth, between now and then. You were dead. I didn't save them."
Jane chose not to say anything about her explanation, chose not to point out how her sentences were thrown together, random, and didn't make much sense. He got the gist of it and the rest didn't matter. He knew exactly why her nightmare had switched between past and present. She considered her brothers as her past, meaning Jon. She considered him to be her present and this morning they'd collided. It might have went rather well but her anxiety towards the initial situation had still lingered and worked it's way into one nasty nightmare. It was quite obvious to him that she had a fear of failing to protect loved ones. She'd failed in her alternate universe, and it apparently worked her up pretty good. He hugged her tighter, ignoring the uncomfortable feel of the shirt clinging to him and the lingering smell of sweat.
"I'm right here."
"I'm afraid of losing you too, Patrick. Every time you piss off the wrong person and pull some stupid stunt, I'm scared that it'll be one too many, or that it'll be the wrong person to mess with."
"Hey, I'm fine. I'll be fine."
"You don't know that." She was right, he didn't but he believed it. He believed he'd be okay and that'd worked for him so far. When another shiver rocked her body, he gently moved her from his lap to settle her back into the pillow.
The sheets were damp with sweat, making it impossible for them to just lie there but he startled her by moving. She grabbed his arm, gripping it almost painfully and he realized something, his wife didn't like being left alone after a nightmare. He found it interesting, wondering what she'd done when there wasn't anyone around. He still tried to walk away and she still held his arm tightly, clearly not getting the hint to follow.
Leaning over the bed, he kissed her forehead and wrapped an arm around her waist, tugging her up. Her skin was cold now, drying and becoming cool to the touch making her step closer to him as he led her out of the room and down the hall. She watched him the entire time, not even paying attention to where she was walking.
She just watched him, scared that this was the dream and he actually was dead. It'd been so strange, so very weird and she could remember parts where she knew she was only having a bad dream and then other parts had seemed so real that she'd forgotten. Another shiver, her body seeming to shake violently as Jane tugged her into the bathroom. She didn't understand what they were doing, didn't know why she was currently in front of the sink but then he clarified some things.
He stepped over the tub, turning on the water and adjusting the temperature as she watched. She didn't know what else to do, her mouth didn't seem to want to protest and her body was already starting to get that pleasant hum that came from low in her belly. She wouldn't let herself get carried away, for all she knew he was simply going to leave as soon as he was done but part of her knew by the look in his eye as he walked back towards her that he wasn't going anywhere. She was grateful, she didn't really want to be alone.
The sound of the shower drown out every other noise, including her breathing when the distance between them closed and he ran his finger along the buttons of the shirt.
"Can I?" She hadn't expected him to ask, the question in his eyes begged to be answered and she just nodded. Her hands twitched at her sides as he set to work on ridding her of the damp fabric. The air that hit her skin as he quickly unfastened each little white round button was warm, made so by the steam bubbling up around them. She felt her fingers jerk against her thigh when he slipped his hands inside the cloth, separating it. His palms brushed against her breasts, smoothing over the peaks and sliding up to her shoulders, making her mouth drop open on a sigh.
She knew he asked as a precaution since she'd pushed him away before, and for some reason that made it all the more endearing. His hands tucked under the collar of the shirt to lift it before sliding down her arms, pushing the cloth completely off of her skin and letting it fall to the floor. She wanted to cover herself even though it was his third time seeing her like that, she still had the urge to hide when he let his eyes rake down her neck, lingering on her chest and then drifting down her torso.
There was something erotic but unnerving about the way he stared, causing her body to tighten just by watching him. She felt heavy, dazed and for once that didn't bother her. She didn't care and when his hand tucked her hair behind her ear, she stepped closer to him. She was braver than their first encounter, letting her own fingers explore a bit. She slid them down his chest, her eyes trained on his face to see if he liked the touch. Judging by the way he bit his lip and let his eyes close, she deducted that he definitely liked it and continued to ghost her way over his stomach.
She could feel his muscles contracting, her own body responding in kind when his hands pushed at the only other piece of clothing she had on. He groaned softly when her fingers brushed along the waistband of his pajama pants, dipping beneath the cotton. She could see his reaction to her touch, see the effect she was having on him and she felt bad for doing something like that to him when she knew they weren't going to be having sex in the shower. That's not what he had brought her in there for and that's not what she wanted.
She was picky, she didn't want them to go at it in the shower before they ever got to enjoy the bed. She felt it would cheapen the experience in some way, take away from the 'first time' aspect that she was looking forward to.
"C'mon Mrs. Jane, let's get you warmed up." His words startled her back to reality, tearing her gaze away from the prominent tent that was forming just below where her fingers rested. Her lips were parted, her eyes half lidded and she wasn't sure she'd heard him right. She was already feeling warmer.
Her hips involuntarily jerked towards him as he pushed her panties to the floor. His hand skimming along very intimate flesh caused the reaction and immediately she mumbled a quick apology. She felt stupid for it as soon as it left her lips but he just offered her a soft smile in return. She didn't know why she'd felt the need to say she was sorry for her body's reaction to his stimulation, it was normal. For the third time in front of him, she was bare of everything and for some reason she was more aroused now than during the previous encounters. She wondered briefly if it had to do with the nightmare but quickly pushed the thought away.
The heat pooling between her thighs, had her in a lust filled daze. She didn't feel cold anymore, the steam spilling into the room and the fire burning between them was enough to have her feeling as if she were in a sauna. Her throat felt dry, her tongue reminding her of cotton as the man in front of her grasped her elbows and led her to the side of the bathtub.
The light mist hit her skin, hot and refreshing before she even made a move to step under the spray. Warm hands were caressing up her arm, ghosting back down to grasp her fingers and help her step under the water. She would've commented, said something about being able to do it on her own but with her legs feeling weakened and her body flooding with desire, she wasn't so sure that she didn't need his help.
It might have been because of the nightmare, it might have been because of something else, but for some reason as soon as she stepped under the pounding spray, her eyes searched for him. She didn't know if he was planning to leave or if he was going to stay. She didn't know if he'd join her or not, she'd never seen him without clothes on. The thought was thrilling, making her pulse accelerate and when she caught his gaze it really sky rocketed.
He was hooking his thumbs under the waistband of his pants, tugging them down and revealing bare skin as his underwear went with them. Her breath hitched in her throat, nerves going numb as the water continued to cascade down her back. She wasn't trying to seem overly enthralled but she couldn't tear her eyes away and when the material was no longer covering him she bit back a moan. He had every intention of joining her and she wasn't sure she could handle having him so close, so naked and so aroused.
It was when he slipped his ring off to set it safely on top of the towel that she realized hers were next to it and she didn't remember taking them off. She didn't take them off. She didn't know why her mind was focusing on something so small when he was stepping into the shower with her and closing the curtain. They were left alone, wet and naked in a small space and the aching between her legs intensified ten fold drawing a desperate whimper from her lips. She could feel the tightening in her belly worsen as he reached over her shoulder for something, his slickened skin brushing along hers.
Her heart was pounding. She could feel it, hear the rush of it in her ears, drowning out the sounds of the shower. His body was close, his chest sliding against her sensitive, straining nipples, sending pleasurable jolts pulsing through her.
"Are you nervous Teresa?" She wanted to say no, but she was. Despite the blood boiling hunger, she was quite nervous. This was a whole new level of their marriage and it was going to take a few moments to get used to it. She tried to shake her head but only managed a very small movement from side to side, barely noticeable. She was doing her best to lie but she felt so heavy with him pressing into her, skin to skin. "I am."
He didn't look it, he looked fine but upon closer inspection, she noticed there was a hint of uncertainty in his eyes. It calmed her down, let her believe that she didn't need to be so jumpy because she wasn't the only one feeling the twisting of a nervous stomach. It made her feel a little better to know that things like this affected him too. Wrapping her hand around his arm, she backed up to stand directly under the steaming water and pulled him with her, their bodies never losing contact. She felt his excitement pressing into her belly, leaving no doubt in her mind that he was just as, if not more, turned on as she was.
She felt the hot liquid soak her hair, running down her face and chest as she fought against the droplets to keep her eyes open. She wanted to see him, wanted to see what he looked like with water trailing over his body, snaking it's way down to the drain.
She couldn't resist, the woman in her was curious and longing for him but she couldn't do it just yet, she couldn't have sex with him. She was selfish, they had work soon and as cheesy as it sounded she'd already picked a day to take their relationship forward. All she had to do was hold out until then, it was just three days. Surely she could make it. She wanted to surprise him on their one month mark, married a whole month which was a feat for them. She had plans for him.
When a soft kiss landed on her lips she was pulled back into the heat of the moment. The taste of water mixed with the taste of Jane making for an intoxicating experience. She wasn't so sure she'd make it those three more days. The badge and gun lying on her table were the furthest things from her mind when he broke the kiss, spun her around and pulled her back against his chest. She could feel him hot and hard against her water coated skin, a soft moan breaking through her lips at the sensation. The coil in her core tightened as she closed her eyes to enjoy the feel of him. If someone had told her a month ago that she'd be standing naked in her shower, Jane's hands caressing up her sides and married to the man, she would've had them committed but having him around was just normal to her now.
Having him in the shower was new, her chest was heaving with ragged breaths just to prove that point but she wasn't going to complain. A gasp filled the air, breaking through the sound of the water pelting against the base of the tub as soap slick fingers gently squeezed her breast. A foamy bath sponge followed closely, washing over the area in soft circles. She couldn't recall him grabbing the purple sponge or lathering it in body wash but she didn't exactly care. The feel of his fingers kneading one breast while the other received the same treatment from a soapy companion had her hips shifting ever so slightly, trying to relieve the pressure. All she accomplished was making herself more aware of how hyper aware their skin had become to touch. Another gentle squeeze from his hand on her chest, softly pinching and pulling a rather loud moan from her lungs, had her letting her head fall back against his shoulder.
She probably would have been embarrassed by the reaction if it wasn't for the way she tilted her face to look up at him, his wet curls and soft eyes. Unable to resist she pushed up on her tip toes - back sliding easily against his chest - and caught his mouth in a heated embrace. She didn't have it in her to start soft and neither of them complained. Tongues dueled as his hands stilled for the moment, lips moving in sweet friction at a slightly uncomfortable and awkward angle. She'd thought her nightmare was real, she'd thought he was dead, she'd thought she'd lost him but she hadn't. He was with her, he was kissing her and she was using it as proof. It might have explained the desperation in which her fingers clung to his thighs.
Lisbon knew she had to stop or she wouldn't wait, she'd pull him out of the shower and drag him back to bed soaking wet if she had to. She slowed it down, turning it from boiling to a light simmer. More affectionate and apologetic. She was terribly sorry for getting him so worked up.
His hands went back to their duty of pleasing and cleaning as their mouths broke apart, eyes opening to lock in an intense stare. His eyes were so dark, filled with longing for more.
"This okay?" His voice was husky and strained but still clear. She didn't know how he could form words at a time like this, she envied that trait while nodding to let him know he wasn't doing anything wrong. Being able to see his hands working over her skin, leaving a soapy trail with the sponge only to be washed away seconds later had a calming effect while leaving her aching for more. It eased her troubled mind, slowly diminishing the images from her nightmare while replacing them with images of him actually washing over her stomach and down the front of her thighs.
Her legs parted of their own accord, letting him dip his hand between. She was sensitive to the touch, her eyes rolling back in her head as he groaned low in his chest. They were teetering on the edge, treading dangerous waters and neither seemed to care. She couldn't help but wonder what it'd feel like without the bath sponge, how it'd feel to be touched so intimately by him. All too soon, he trailed back up to work over her arms, under them and taking extra care to caress her hands. The adoration she felt for him mixed with the thirst and she couldn't stop herself from pressing back into him, her hips having a mind of their own.
She felt sorry for him the second he let out a pitiful sound and took a step back. He wasn't trying to get away from her, he was just too worked up and he wanted to finish what he'd set out to do which was to help her. Sponge in hand, he glided it over her back, watching her muscles contract and relax under the touch. She was beautiful, her skin frictionless and the delicious little noises she kept making were driving him insane. He didn't want to push her but he really hoped she relinquished soon, he wanted to take her to bed. He was craving her, wanting nothing more than to spin her around, pin her to the wall and do wonderful things to her body but he held himself back.
He tried to focus on anything but how pliable her breasts felt beneath his hands, how satiny her skin was even when dry despite some scars spattering about. He made himself think of the water but then that led him right back to what he was doing, washing her naked form. She must have taken pity on him, reaching for the sponge to work it down her legs and around her feet as he opened her shampoo bottle and asked her to lean back. His initial priority had been to lovingly help her get warm and clean after seeing her so broken up over her nightmare. He wasn't sure what the hell happened to that plan but he desperately tried to get himself under control.
Lathering the shampoo into her dark locks, he heard her sigh and had to fight with himself. He wouldn't do anything, he was waiting, she wasn't ready. Forcing the desire coursing through him to die down, he massaged her scalp while staring down at his 'friend'. It wasn't going away, she was too close, too wet and too naked for him to be able to calm down. He quickly gave up, deciding it'd be best if he got her out of the shower within the next three minutes.
Rinsing his hands under the spray, he was silently grateful that she was a simple woman who bought the shampoo with conditioner mixed in. He wasn't sure he could handle much more. He didn't think it could get much worse than straining in need but when she turned towards him to rinse out the back of her hair, he realized that it could.
She was giving him a clear view of her front, arms stretched over her head causing her breasts to stick out further - practically begging him to come closer. He closed his eyes, he couldn't watch the water cascading over her skin, leaving little suds in random places or he'd snap. It'd been so long since he'd done something like this, too long and he couldn't take anymore. He'd thought he could do this for her, but he couldn't.
"Patrick, are you okay?"
"Are you done?" He didn't mean to sound rude but he needed the shower to himself. He needed to switch off the hot water and drench himself in ice cold. Oh how he dreaded it. He needed her to step out. Opening one eye, he knew he looked ridiculous standing there naked, hard and fists clenched at his sides. He couldn't remember why he'd thought this would be a good idea. Her sparkling eyes stared curiously at him, raking over his body and landing on a certain part of his anatomy. He caught the way her eyes slightly widened each time she found herself staring, caught the flush in her cheeks. She ran her hands through her soaked hair a few more times and then nodded. "I uh, I need a minute to..."
She understood as soon as he shifted uncomfortably trying to relieve his pent up problem, though he grew worried when she stepped towards him instead of away. A soft kiss was placed on his lips, barely there, showing her appreciation as well as her own arousal and frustration with not quite being able to take it further. Something held her back, he didn't know what it was but he was starting to think he'd combust before figuring it out.
"Thank you Patrick, I'm sorry about..." Her eyes shot downward between them as her words trailed off. "I'll make breakfast."
He managed a garbled reply at her awkward statement as she exited the shower. He would have teased but he found her cute and endearing. He told himself that he'd accomplished his mission. He'd wanted to make her forget her nightmare, to warm her up and he'd managed. He'd just created a huge discomfort for himself in the process. Whimpering at the thought of what he was about to do, he wrapped his hand around the hot water handle and twisted. The woman would be the death of him.
Next up: She was pissed, she was sexually frustrated and she was more than a little irate that she hadn't had any coffee yet. It was not her day, she was not happy and Jane was doing his best to cheer her up but it wasn't going to work. She'd had big plans for them, she'd thought of breaking out their pillows for another pallet in the living room and possibly a movie to relax a few hours before giving in to the tension buzzing between them but no. Now she was stuck in a motel room on her one month anniversary.