CHAPTER 12 – Roses

Hangovers and reunions

The next morning at breakfast, Surana only picked at her food, favoring the black coffee that Leliana kept pouring into her mug with an air of bright cheerfulness that even irritated Cullen. Finally Arisha glowered at Leliana, holding up a spoon of porridge threateningly. "Nightingale, keep it up and I'm going to forget that you're being made Divine in a couple of weeks."

"Why, what makes you say that, Arisha?" The ex-spymaster's voice was as innocent as the expression on her face. "My, you do look a bit under the weather this morning."

The warden threatened her with the spoon of porridge for a moment longer before putting it back in the bowl with a groan and covering her eyes with both thin, scarred hands. "Did you really think if you insisted on a party last night, of all nights, that I might indulge a bit too much? Yes, I have a sodding headache. What did you expect? At least I'm not hiding in the Undercroft." Despite his own uneasy reflections about yet another conversation which went from tense to friendly then abruptly to awkward, Cullen felt some sympathy for her this morning. Timur, however, sneezed in amusement, earning himself a glower from his friend.

"No fear of that, at least." Cadash's cheerfully opaque remark earned her a glare in turn, but the Inquisitor simply responded to her glare by pushing a tiny bottle down to Surana past Adan's empty chair. "Thought you might be feeling last night's ale this morning. Here, a little something Adan whips up for me. Add it to your coffee. Trust me, it helps."

Dorian glanced up from across the table. "Ah, our alchemical wizard who is no doubt barricaded in his workroom to avoid the fuss this morning, unlike the rest of us. However what she's not saying, my good warden, is that anything her good alchemist makes tastes worse than horse piss but is remarkably effective. If you add that to your coffee, you'll want a clean mug if you plan to drink anything else."

Surana picked up the vial but regarded it dubiously before shrugging. "Be glad you've never tasted the Joining chalice, horse piss would be ambrosia by comparison. And if it helps me get through the morning without snarling at anyone or getting the Wardens banished from Ferelden…"

Cadash snickered. "Besides, shows what you know, Dorian. Adan leaves the bronto piss out of almost everything he makes for me."

Dorian stiffened in outrage. "What! Wait, it tastes like that on purpose?"

"Didn't you know? He doesn't want anyone using up his draughts unless they really need them." The dwarf grinned smugly at him, tucking a stray blonde curl back into the wrap on her head, a rich purple today that better complemented her fine leather armor instead of her preferred green, a compromise with Josephine who'd tried, futilely, to veto any head wrap. Cullen also noticed that Josephine herself had finally acquiesced to the argument that the Fereldan court would be singularly unimpressed with the Inquisition's seriousness if they wore the ornate uniforms made for the Orlesian court. Even the Antivan simply wore her finest everyday clothing, although she seemed to have taken more care than usual with her appearance, if that was possible.

"But he makes yours differently?" Surana gingerly poured the contents of the vial into her mug of coffee and sipped dubiously, then began to drink more heartily, her thin face showing such relief that Cullen had to suppress a laugh, some of his own apprehensions relaxing at the same time.

"Of course. If I have a headache and sick stomach, who am I going to take my bad temper out on? Or rather, who will we take our bad tempers out on since we usually drink together?" The Inquisitor winked. "And he seems to be particularly concerned about my welfare in the field for some reason. I can't imagine why."

"Maybe because you got such a big bruise on your arse from that dragon fight in Crestwood that you could barely sit your horse on the trip back?" Sera's grin was wicked, but the Inquistor just chuckled with a nostalgic grin.

"I dunno, there was something kind of sweet about the way that crotchety rock licker roared at me when I got back. And threatened to dump me in my bathtub still dressed so I couldn't put my armor back on until it was re-treated. Might have made me think he was going all soft, maybe even was worrying about me a little."

"My dear Inquisitor, you two may be many things, but I don't think sweet is a word I've ever heard used to describe either of you." Dorian was more amused now, though still a bit disgruntled. "Not that I object, mind you, I have a low tolerance for sweetness and light, but it does sometimes make it difficult for the observer to tell when you two are just saying I missed you and when you're about to start throwing sharp objects."

"Ha! I've never thrown anything more dangerous than a pillow or bread. At him, anyway." She fingered one of her knives significantly, even Surana joining in the laughter, looking less queasy and pale by the moment. Then Josephine took one look at the number of visible weapons on the Inquisitor and began arguing over how much weaponry was acceptable while most of the rest of the table excused themselves quickly and wisely fled.

Mid-morning one of the watchers rode in with word that the royal party had been spotted about half an hour away, and Cullen had a sentry blow a horn to signal everyone in the welcoming party to assemble in the courtyard. He had just finished making certain the honor guards were in position just in front of the grooms and servants waiting to assist the travelers when he caught sight of Surana, Timur, and Rylen heading through the door to the anteroom to the right of the gate and called out to them, curiously heading in their direction.

"Aren't you two also part of the welcoming party?"

Surana obviously barely restrained the urge to roll her eyes, and she definitely turned toward him with a whiff of mulish rebelliousness as her free hand fell briefly to the hilt of her sword. "I promised the Inquisitor I'd be present, but there's no reason anyone needs to get distracted before they've been introduced to the senior Inquisition members."

Rylen's own grin bordered on impertinent. "That would be you, Commander, not us. Surana's not even officially part of the Inquisition yet. And I am just…"

"My second-in-command." Cullen wasn't about to let the knight captain desert him completely, though he didn't blame either of them in the least for wanting to dodge some of the formalities.

"Which means my place is in the background. Way in the background, Commander. Behind both Commanders." Surana not-so-subtly elbowed Rylen, then smiled with a very obvious false innocence.

"I also thought we could watch them approach across the bridge so I could see which of their nobles we're going to have to deal with for the next few days. Then slip back out here to the top of the steps once they're all inside the courtyard with their backs to me so my presence doesn't derail Josephine's carefully planned introductions. She is expecting people like Queen Anora, not King Alistair, and once he catches sight of me and decides to start demanding answers about where I've been for two years, nothing short of direct intervention by the Maker himself will put Josephine's ceremonies back on course." She shrugged, then continued resolutely through the door with Rylen and Timur. Cullen glanced around the courtyard and abruptly decided he could join them at least until the royal party reached the far end of the bridge, a decision that he firmly told himself had nothing to do with escaping the fluttering, nervous Orlesian nobles gathering who seemed to sense that they were about to be overrun by a pack of untrained mabari. "And I would bet my best dress that Bann Shianni will leave Josephine speechless if she's along."

Rylen's laugh came from the belly then, a rich unrestrained sound as he leaned against the wall next to the window where she was peering outward. "You, Surana? Have a best dress? The woman who informed me that the only reason the Chantry made mages wear robes was to slow them down if they tried to run?"

She snickered in return, rather surprising Cullen with how at ease she seemed to be with the Templar. Then again, they had been training together, and apparently drinking together, for most of a week. "Alright, it wouldn't be that much of a bet at the moment, I admit, though actually I do sometimes like dresses. But just try scrubbing one of those Orlesian court dresses in a stream on a rock and see how it looks." Timur sneezed twice, and the elf glowered at him. "You! You were a lot of help this morning, laughing at me in front of everyone when I had a hangover. Keep it up and I'll tell the story of how you raided Morrigan's bag of herbal components."

The mabari assumed his own innocent air, but the warden just snorted. "Don't give me that look, trying to convince me it was an accident. You don't make a mistake like that by accident four times." Rylen and Cullen chuckled as the mabari's ears drooped. "Yes, and who sat up with you while you were sick all night every time without laughing at you?"

Now the mabari somehow snorted, a noise that was outright skepticism as was the way he cocked his head at her. "Alright, maybe I wasn't that sympathetic, but that was after the first two times." She stroked his head lovingly, and he leaned back into her hand affectionately. "You scared me, you know. You aren't going to lose me to a hangover, even if it was probably as stupid." She didn't quite meet either man's eyes, as if a little embarrassed at the affectionate exchange, then turned back to the window to study the road in the distance. "Hmm, I think I see a couple of standards, they might be Ferelden."

Rylen and Cullen stood closely behind her, one on either side, peering into the distance. Cullen also saw something moving, but Rylen squinted, concentrating intently. "I see something, but I can't quite make out the heraldry, just that it looks like some sort of animal, rampant."

Surana raised a silently questioning eyebrow at him, and he chuckled. "That's the fancy heraldic term for an animal rearing up with only one foot on the ground and the front feet attacking."

"Hmm, not something we were taught at the circle, though I was supposed to learn some as Warden Commander. Somehow there never seemed to be time to do more than learn to quickly recognize the arms of the people sworn to Amarathine. But yes, the Ferelden arms have two mabari facing each other in that pose. Not that it's likely to be anyone else today."

A few moments more, and the stately procession had neared enough for the devices on the standards to become visible as, in fact, mabari. Rylen cleared his throat before speaking with mock gravity. "Commander, I do believe that if you don't reappear shortly, Ambassador Montilyet may mount a search."

Cullen was tempted to join them in their mild rebelliousness and stay at least a few moments longer to hear some of Surana's thoughts about the nobles, but experience told him that Josephine was probably already in a panic over his truancy. He nodded with a certain amount of dignity and rejoined the group in the courtyard to discover that Josephine was indeed in a dither, both about him and the missing Warden Commander. Somewhat guiltily, he reassured her that Surana would make her appearance at the appropriate moment and stopped her from sending anyone to search for her. He actually had no doubts that the Warden would appear, in her own way and without any sign of the mulishness she had been demonstrating, though he wondered just how much Josephine knew about the reasons for Surana's reluctance. As they watched the twin lines of riders now filing onto the other end of the bridge, he also mused wryly that Josephine had not inquired after Rylen, feeling certain that the only reason she hadn't demanded the knight captain serve as the head of the honor guard was Josephine's fears that his normal…frankness might inconveniently exhibit itself.

"No sign of Shianni, damn. Still, we're a long way from Denerim, and she's never really been comfortable on a horse." The two truants stood so their faces were shadowed from the approaching riders, and Surana had been softly ticking off names and pithy opinions of the score of nobles accompanying the royals on this visit. "No Arl Eamon, which means no Arlessa Isolde, praise the Maker for small mercies." Rylen shifted at her uncharacteristic piety, and she chuckled, continuing to keep her voice low. "Oh, she's a nice woman, devoted to Eamon in her way, but I swear, for someone born into the Orlesian nobility and The Game, she needs a keeper. And she chatters. To me."

She tilted her head, trying to get a better look at some of the nobles passing in the farther line. "Bann Sighard, that's the greying man in the far line of riders, and his son Oswin on the horse behind that. Good news for me, Sighard'll let me hide behind him at anything formal and glare down any asses who still manage to find me. Pretty reasonable most of the time, though he's good at inserting language in agreements that you want to read carefully. And I'm glad to see Oswin's finally healed enough for a trip like this." Surana was aware of Rylen's eyes in a sideways glance, but didn't elaborate. "Bann Alfstanna, she's sensible, she and Josephine will hit it off, I think. She might ask to join us for sparring at some point, she can only tolerate sitting patiently in meetings for so long at a stretch….No sign of Arl Teagan; that's too bad, but Anora probably thought it would be more diplomatic to exclude him and Eamon because of what happened in Redcliffe."

At that moment, the standards passed far enough forward that the royal couple themselves were finally visible, strikingly handsome and richly dressed in the Theirin red and gold, riding with a well-dressed older man with a neatly trimmed short brown beard and alert brown eyes on their side closest to the window. Surana chuckled softly and Rylen was surprised to realize her eyes were not on either of the royals, but on the man escorting them, who in Rylen's judgement was something of a plain sparrow next to the royals. The king in particular exuded an unselfconscious charisma that had little to do with his fair good looks. "Andraste's flaming knickers, I am in luck. No one can deflect Anora the way Teryn Fergus can, and if Josephine insists on going through with her plans to include dancing in the formal evening entertainments and I can't escape, he'll get me through at least one dance without making a complete idiot of myself."

"Not a dancer, then?" Rylen grinned wickedly at her groan.

"I wouldn't care to guess about the Free March circles, but court dancing wasn't taught at Kinloch Hold, and I didn't exactly have an abundance of time for anything frivolous once I became Warden Commander."

"And no one taught you when you went to court in Denerim?"

She snorted. "I never spent a moment longer there than I had to, and I stayed out of view as much as I could. Teryn Fergus and Bann Sighard rescued me through the few times I couldn't completely avoid it, and they didn't even tease me too much for all the times I stepped on their feet. Do you?"

"Maker, no! And neither does the Commander. Between being sent to hold Griffon Wing Keep or having to face the nobles at the Winter Palace, well, I'd say the Western Approach looked like a garden spot."

She shot him an odd look at his insertion of Cullen, but simply laughed softly. "Ah, that explains why he was so familiar with their amusements too." At this point, the royals were out of sight, and the trailing procession of guards, retainers, and, of course, a few mabari, were passing through the gate. The mage sighed and straightened. "Well, you can probably still slip out and hide behind some of the guards. I'll stay just inside the door, listening, until I feel Josephine's introductions are far enough along that it won't be a disaster if someone spots me."

Rylen chuckled and slapped her companionably on the shoulder. "Good luck, Surana. Hopefully they'll be more relieved to see you alive than they are angry because they thought you'd run barking mad into the wilderness."

The King and Queen had been properly re-introduced to Inquisitor Cadash, though no mention was made of their less pleasant meeting in Redcliffe over a year earlier. Both of them already knew Leliana, of course, and while she and Anora exchanged formal kisses on the cheeks, Alistair had swept Leliana into a brief hug, more to the surprise of the Inquisition spectators, perhaps, than his own courtiers who were, by now, well accustomed to their king's occasional impulsiveness. Then Josephine presented Anora with a bouquet of very small roses, rather ordinary in appearance, but with a richly sweet fragrance that seemed to penetrate every corner of the courtyard. Surana, who by now had moved into the doorway to watch discretely, wondered if Josephine had coerced Adan or one of the mages into enhancing their natural scent, it was such a perfect essence of rose.

Bann Alfstanna seemed to be playing Josephine's counterpart, the two women taking it in turns to introduce the senior members of the Inquisition and the nobles and other advisors accompanying the royals. After he was introduced, Cullen moved out of the way to make room for others to be introduced, and found himself near the middle-aged man who had been introduced as the Teryn of Highever. They nodded politely to each other, then without thinking, Cullen glanced at the anteroom door to see if Arisha had made her appearance yet. When he turned back, he found the Teryn had followed his gaze and was standing quite still, surprise and delight flashing briefly across his face before the formal mask dropped back into place. Before Cullen could react, the man had stepped up behind the royals, politely interrupting the ambassador to draw their attention to Surana. "Your majesties, there's someone here you really need to see."

The entire Fereldan party followed his finger curiously to where the Warden Commander stood proudly remote, so erect and poised with her right hand resting on the hilt of her sword that she could have been the model for a statue of a martial hero. Only her other hand on Timur's head softened her stance as she calmly met the eyes of the two royals, ignoring the curses of surprise and murmurs sweeping the visitors in the courtyard. A few of the other nobles reacted with the same pleasure as Teryn Fergus, but most just looked surprised, and Cullen caught at least a couple of faces surprised into revealing anger or something uglier before they brought themselves under control. A glance at Leliana assured him that she had taken note of those reactions, which reassured him. However, there was frank adoration and relief on the faces of most of the soldiers and servants.

Alistair, however, simply stared for a long moment, his mouth silently moving to form the word, "Surana?" Then Anora rested a hand lightly on his forearm and he seemed to remember where he was. He exchanged a look with Anora before barking brusquely at Surana, to Cullen's surprise. "Warden Commander Surana, I assume you have an explanation for your absence for the past two years?"

The waves of whispering in the courtyard fell silent, and Surana returned Alistair's glare with a stare that was glacially cool. "Your Majesty, are you asking as the King of Ferelden or as a grey warden? Unless a new treaty was negotiated between the Grey Wardens and Ferelden that I have not been made aware of, the Commander of the Grey is not required to divulge confidential Grey Warden business to rulers of countries with whom we have signed treaties. Nor do Grey Wardens under her command normally demand answers from their commander. Pardon me, Your Majesties, I should have added former Grey Wardens." Cullen hadn't realized how much she had begun to let the remote, uncompromising façade of the Warden Commander slip over the past few days until it slammed back in place forcefully, her calm, precise words backed by ice and an edge as sharp as an obsidian blade, her posture erect and rigid as a statute carved from granite. Anora's expression didn't particularly change—the Warden Commander had clearly been very unexpected but she was maintaining a polite façade—but the king's head rocked back slightly as if slapped. Anora stepped in before he could react.

"In case you have forgotten, you are also Arlessa of Amaranthine, and we have some right to be concerned about the extended absence of someone who is responsible for protecting lands under our rule."

"Arlessa acting for the Grey Wardens, but always Warden Commander first, Your Majesty." Her words to Anora were tinged less by ice and more by a formal politeness. "However, I did report to both of you that I was required to pursue something urgent for some time and that I was leaving Amaranthine in the hands of our seneschal and my second-in-command, Warden Constable Nathaniel Howe. Teryn Cousland, I enclosed that letter to their Majesties in a packet of reports and letters I addressed to you, did I not, your lordship?" The middle aged man inclined his head politely, giving Cullen the odd feeling that he was suppressing a smile.

"You did indeed, and I made certain Their Majesties saw that letter, as I indicated in my reply. However, the letter didn't indicate quite…such an extended absence, my lady Commander."

"Warden Howe and the other Fereldan Grey Wardens vanished, and without the courtesy of notifying us, though I admit your seneschal has managed the lands well despite their absence. But why didn't you send word to us that you had returned, Warden Commander?" Alistair remained silent, allowing Anora to question the warden while he brought his reactions back under control, a phenomenon that the Warden Commander clearly noted, briefly.

"Because when I arrived here a few days ago, I was first told you were already on the way here. Any message I sent would most likely have passed you on the road and be most of the way to Denerim by now, as should be my message to my seneschal, Your Majesty. It seemed the simplest response was to wait for your arrival, especially as the Divine-Elect has requested that I lend the Inquisition my assistance for at least a few months. In light of events that occurred during my absence, and until I have some lead on the whereabouts of my missing Wardens, I felt it was my duty to agree."

"You've joined the Inquisition?" The words seemed to burst out of Alistair, but Anora's hand tightening on his forearm seemed to calm him as a new murmur swept the Fereldens, a gesture that Surana clearly observed, her voice when she spoke again noticeably less icy though still formal.

"For a time, at least until the situation in the South is better stabilized and until I've finished the project I agreed to undertake here. However I believe the Lady Montilyet has a reception luncheon then a tour of Skyhold planned for you. Perhaps she can clear some time later today so we can all speak more privately and I may give you what explanations my oaths permit." At that moment, Timur, who had remained almost frozen under her hand throughout the confrontation, as much a part of her tableau of heroic-warden-carved-in-granite as she, suddenly began whining at the king, his rear end wiggling beseechingly. That tiny action seemed to break the tension, and Alistair shifted his attention to the old warrior, crouching and calling him forward to give the mabari a friendlier reunion. Even Anora greeted Timur by name with surprising warmth. Or perhaps not so surprising from a Fereldan queen, Cullen mused. The other nobles were told off by Josephine to be escorted to rooms by the waiting soldiers while her aide took notes and quickly located her counterpart among the retainers so servants and luggage could be sorted and dispatched efficiently in the wake of the nobles. Cullen stayed put near Arisha until the chaos could be dispersed and saw the middle-aged Fergus brush off Josephine's efforts, instead approaching the stairs where Arisha watched him approaching with a wry grin.

"My dear Warden Commander, when did you develop a taste for such dramatic entrances?" She drew herself up in a melodramatically haughty pose in response as if taking offense.

"I have absolutely no idea what your lordship means." The mage didn't resist, however, when the man took her right hand in his, bringing it to his lips in a courtly and elegant gesture, his eyes gleaming with mischief. "Well, at least you are speaking to me." Her voice was very soft now, and Cullen was fairly certain very few people other than himself and Rylen, who had silently appeared at his elbow once the formalities had broken up, were close enough to hear it over the hubbub.

"I shouldn't be. You did have us all worried, Surana."

"Nonsense. You knew Timur wouldn't let me do anything truly stupid."

He squeezed her hand briefly, then frowned, turning to stare at the mabari briefly then back at her. "Wait, are you telling me you only took an elderly mabari? Maker's breath, Surana, you traveled alone for two years, even with a mabari like Timur?"

She pulled her hand free, shrugging defensively as she rested it on the hilt of her sword. "I came back, didn't I?" The older man seemed about to add something then chuckled ruefully.

"I told their majesties that you said if you didn't get away from being stared at for a little while, half their court was going to end up with icicles hanging off their noses, but even I never thought you'd be gone this long! I can't say you look more rested though. Or better fed, Maker's breath!"

"We were roughing it. Shit happens." Surana shrugged again, and Cullen got the oddest feeling she was being evasive, though he couldn't say why. Her voice dropped even lower. "So, I was expecting Alistair to forget himself and either try to scold me or rant at me, but all Anora had to do was get his attention and he played his part perfectly. Fenedhis, has she actually taught him to think before he talks?"

Fergus chuckled, though his eyes slid briefly to Cullen and Rylen and back to her questioningly, apparently reassured by her slight smile. "Sometimes, yes. And with that performance, anyone trying to keep any rumors alive is going to have an uphill battle."

"Sodding idiots." About that time, Timur rejoined her, greeting Fergus like an old friend, then Anora called Fergus's name, with a note of impatience to her summons. He nodded his acquiescence to Anora and took both of Surana's hands this time, kissing them lightly.

"Duty calls. Will you be included in the tour this afternoon?"

"No, for the sake of keeping peace and goodwill. Besides, I'll be training mid-afternoon with him." She used her chin to indicate Rylen who abruptly had the look of someone desperately searching for an escape from the path of a charging bull when the Teryn surveyed him quickly before nodding at both men thoughtfully.

"Then I'll see if their majesties can spare me and we'll have to catch up."

"I'd like that. I want to hear all about the family."

Surana and Timur watched him rejoin the royals, smilingly winningly at Lady Josephine as he apologized. A surprising amount of the crowd had dispersed by this point, and Surana simply nodded at the two men and slipped away with Timur in the direction of the kitchens. Cullen parted from Rylen at the top of the stairs and walked toward his office thoughtfully. He'd found himself shying away from thinking about his feelings and reactions towards Surana since she'd arrived, and he still wasn't certain what it was he felt. At least she didn't seem to feel any awkwardness toward him this morning, though it was possible that she had been drunk enough that she didn't remember exactly what she said. While he'd been a little unnerved by the idea of her visiting the Pearl, he found he wasn't that bothered once he thought through what else she had said, even if it was a solution he would not have been comfortable with himself. But he'd lain in bed last night thinking of what she had said and remembered Leliana's statement that Surana sometimes let things slip when she was drunk. He wondered if maybe, just maybe, Arisha herself had peeked out through those bitter, resigned words instead of the Warden Commander or the hero or even the mage Surana.