Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural

Warnings: Contains MPREG. Don't like don't read.

~Chapter Twelve~

When they finally were allowed to see Sam, Dean held back with Bobby and quickly gave Cas the go ahead that it was okay. Cas hesitated for a moment before nodding his understanding and heading towards the room number 443. He pushed it open slowly, watching the other two who didn't even seem to have problems with Cas being able to go in first.

It was when Cas disappeared through the door that Dean turned to Bobby with a frown on his face.

"We need to take down that Chloe bitch! I mean, I know she wasn't involved in this but she needs to go down."

Bobby nodded in agreement.

"Where could we find her though? We're gonna need a lot more help though-"

"I know, but first things first. If Cas is away from Sam too much, he's going to lose focus-"

Bobby gave him an incredulous look.

"Ya idjit there ain't no way he's going to be normal at all. You heard the doctor. Your brother is going to be a parent and our fallen angel happens to have fathered both kids. You don't ever recover from something like that! Never Dean and you think we could just pull him out-"

"You know Bobby you are starting to sound like Sam. Is there a chance that maybe you lost one as well?" Bobby didn't hesitate on hitting him for that and Dean looked at him in shock. "What, it sounds like-"

"-Like I lost my wife. Don't you ever think Dean? Sure the majority of these people here lost their children in some way but pain is pain and it doesn't matter how bad it is, it's going to hurt. You should know having lost your daddy."

"I know Bobby it's just, if we need him, we need him. I know he isn't going through the best of times right now. I can't believe I'm actually hearing Sam's going to be having a baby boy and with Cas no less."

"I know, but you have to honestly believe that between the two, the boy will be loved and somewhat spoilt. Let's just hope they do grounding early so that the kid can actually stay in time out when we put him there."

Dean snorted.

"He's a Winchester of course he isn't just going to sit still." He continued, frowning. "Chloe is probably out there doing who knows what. I say we go to the library and research."

Bobby grumbled.

They already had issues finding information before and it was the freaky visions that Sam kept getting that helped them any in the first place. He just hoped that they weren't going to be needing Cas anytime soon.

Cas stared in awe at all the wires and tubes running to machines and in Sam. It surprised him that humans needed all those things to just survive. Sitting down in one of the plastic chairs, he wished Sam would just wake up and let him know that he was fine. He wasn't even going to blame him for anything. Hesitantly, he took Sam's hand in his and it felt cold.

"You don't have to be scared of talking to him." Cas almost jumped up and seeing it was only the nurse replacing the IV bag, he let himself calm down. She continued though saying, "Did you know that even though he's in a coma now, studies have shown that coma patients could hear you. It might speed up recovery as well."

Cas didn't really think of that. He still couldn't get the fact that all these tubes and wires were attached to Sam. He had the tube going down his throat. He was told that that thing was helping him breathe since his lungs weren't doing so great on their own right now. Then there was the tube going down his nose and he wasn't sure about that one. There were so many of them that he did not know.

"The one going in his nose, what's that for?" The nurse looked over and then allowed herself a small smile.

"Just a feeding tube," She reassured him. "He's getting fluids to keep him hydrated but he also needs nutrients being pregnant and all. We're also monitoring the pressure in his brain so if it goes over a certain level, he'll need surgery to reduce the swelling. So far, it's gone down two or three. He has a catheter seeing as how he's not going anywhere in this state and there's the monitor that is telling us how his heart is doing. He's doing okay right now though. It's okay to be scared for him and with enough support he'll make it through."

Cas nodded taking in every word. He saw the cut on his forehead and was glad it was healing up nicely. It was definitely smaller than the last time he saw it. Turning back towards the nurse, he decided to voice his question out loud.

"Wasn't the cut on his forehead bigger before?"

She nodded and although she tried to mask her concern, he knew that they were somehow worried about it. He frowned and tightened his hold on Sam's hand hoping beyond all odds that he'd feel that and somehow wake up.

"It's not really concerning to the doctors, since it's healing nicely and all. The thing that has me worried is that two hours after we put the stitches in, we had to take it out. It got better faster than we even thought it would and it was a bad wound to begin with. When we did the CT-scan, there was brain swelling but not as bad as it could have been. It's just a miracle. I've worked in this hospital for years and not once did I see someone come in with fast healing injuries. The doctors say that all he needs to do is become able to breathe on his own and then to wake up. He does those two things and we won't have any worry at all. We would still test him to make sure he hasn't gotten any permanent brain damage. Well if you have any more questions, I have to check on the other patients but I'll be checking up from time to time."

Cas nodded.

Once she left, he became curious enough to see if there was a bump in the stomach yet. He found it without any problems and hesitantly put his hand there for a moment. He wasn't expecting the kick so soon and quickly withdrew his hand. But he was smiling. His baby had said hi and had done so by showing he was alive and literally kicking. Turning back to face Sam, he saw what the nurse meant when she told him it was a miracle.

"You gotta be okay Sam." He sighed. He wasn't good with expressing feelings, he was an angel and it didn't help that after Sam left Dean for that period of time, they had become even more distant than ever. He thought Sam was okay to be his friend at the least when he returned and they continued to converse. It only became somewhat of a dream that they'd talk and find out what went wrong.

Sam didn't want to talk about what had happened though. He didn't want Cas to know that he had lost Sophie and he hadn't let on why he went with Ruby, continuing to take the demon blood like it was a vital vitamin. Then when Lucifer was released there was shouting and thick apologies through tears that ended in what Cas was certain were the creation of the one Sam was carrying now. It had happened only after the tears were dry and everything else was either shouted or said. Zachariah had already tried to get to them and it made Cas even more bent on making sure that hadn't happened either.

But what had he done?

Now that Cas knew about this little one, he was quite sure that if the baby went beyond the twentieth week, then there wouldn't be any issues with the birth. This baby hadn't gone yet. He wished that Sam would tell him everything after he was better.

"You should have told me about Sophie Sam. What did Ruby say to you that made you believe her death was your fault? You couldn't have been. She was going to die whether you knew about her or not and quite frankly I didn't help much. I'm an angel of the lord and yet I couldn't even tell that I was going to be a father. Some angel I am right? I couldn't even tell about this one but that could be because of the fact that I branded your ribs. Maybe that's why I couldn't see because the baby isn't developed enough to show itself yet. I'm sorry Sam. If you could really hear me, I didn't want any of this to happen."

He paused, putting a hand through Sam's soft hair and placing a kiss on his forehead. He missed seeing those dimples already. He wanted Sam to smile and not have any worries. Cas was here now and he was going to help support him when it came to the baby. Sighing, he wished he had saw it sooner, had been there for him.

"I know you messed up Sam, but you aren't the only one because I screwed this all up. It's okay though because I'm not going anywhere Sam. I'm going to be there for you and the baby. Whenever you need me, you call and I'll come. I'll make sure you aren't lonely anymore and that you have everything you need. Lucifer won't touch you. He won't 'make you his bitch'. "

If this was any other time, he would have been completely curious about the liquid coming from his eyes. He knew what they were called. Sam had told him that someone with a soul used them when they were sad and that letting them out was expressing words that hearts couldn't express. He felt a squeeze on his hand and he let himself smile. Sam wasn't out of the woods yet but he was able to show he was here as well. He said the one thing that first came to mind and he found himself believing every word.

"I love you."

The saying that a coma person could still dream had never rang any more true. Sam saw himself dreaming about the first time with Castiel. He was quite certain that already happened. In this black abyss though, he couldn't really tell where he was or what was going on. All he knew was something happened, something really bad. Light occasionally shown bright in the corner of the room but Sam let it go. In the movies they weren't supposed to go towards the light or they died so he was staying far from that until he knew where he was.

"Cas!" he screamed. After not hearing anything he screamed for him again. He felt so dizzy all of a sudden and he allowed himself to sit. He pulled his sweaty hair out of his face and wanted nothing more than to go somewhere familiar.

The light suddenly grew and blinded him momentarily and when he came to, he was in a hospital. The nurse was helping him out and he wasn't sure if he should let her be this close. He scooted away only to feel the pain tugging at his lower abdomen.

"Sorry sweetie but we won't be able to stop the labor. You'll be having a baby tonight," the female doctor said sadly.

Sam found himself shaking his head. Absolutely not! He remembered! The baby had to stay there because it was too early! He couldn't just push and allow her to die! But the painful contractions were contradicting him. They were letting him know that his body was ready to push the baby out no matter if he was ready for it or not. Tears came to his eyes knowing he couldn't stall it and he didn't want the baby to die.

"I know it's hard," the nurse said sympathetically. "But there's nothing that could be done. I'm sure your boyfriend won't be upset, we could even call him-"

Sam moaned loudly.

He didn't want Cas to know about this. Sam hadn't even known until now and it was breaking his heart. There was no telling what it would do to the angel. For someone who claimed he was a warrior of God and hadn't really had the emotions to deal with anything, he knew angels had hearts. It was why Cas was able to care enough. He just didn't know it but God gave the ability to love to more than just humans. And by telling him this, Cas's would break in half.

"I'm okay, I'll be okay," He quickly told her and she nodded although he knew she wasn't really listening.

The baby came out crying weakly. She was really tiny and Sam knew that the possibility of her surviving was too small. Still he held her close to him, loving her even though he barely even met her. Her wails were even too weak and he found himself kissing her forehead and holding her close to his chest, wishing beyond the odds that she'd survive.

"Your name's Sophie," He declared. "Sophie Allana." It meant precious wisdom and fit her down to the little fingers and toes. Besides he heard somewhere that naming them could help them survive. Even if there was a brief chance that they could but he somehow knew it wasn't going to happen. She wasn't going to be okay and yet he could call her by her given name instead of by girl or baby. She belonged to him and out of the love that he had for the angel. She had those piercing blue eyes that he even fell for.

"I love you Sophie."

It didn't matter how long he held her because he would be going a life time without her.

Throwing the other book to join the ones before it, Dean was about ready to give up. Besides him he knew Bobby wasn't having much luck with them either. No lore about nephilims would even begin to help them with the Chloe bitch.

"Maybe we could entice some help from the demons. I know what we'd be doing," Bobby quickly added before Dean could interrupt. "But we have nothing to lose and I am betting that they don't like having even a half angel working for them. I mean if I were them I'd be planning to kill her."

Dean nodded.

"You think we should call Cas on this one? I mean, Bobby I know that he is overly worried about Sam but we still need to end this once and for all-"

"Let's visit and see how Sam is doing. You could talk to him and try to get him to help out. Get him to see reason."

"And how would I do that?" Dean asked hesitantly, getting into the driver's side of the impala and starting the engine up.

"Tell him that she will still be likely to come after Sam for all I care. That kid is going to be okay by himself for thirty minutes at least."

Dean nodded.

"My brother finally found love Bobby. How in the world could he believe that he shouldn't even deserve it?" He knew his brother wasn't perfect but he knew how his brother must be feeling. He lost someone and blamed himself, possibly thinking he'd never be good enough.

Bobby sighed.

"I don't think that we could ever come to comprehend the loss of a child Dean. It's supposed to be the worst kind of death for a parent to experience."

"And yet, Sam held it in all this time. He keeps feeling responsible for things and keeping it in. I know Cas couldn't have known but I'm his brother and I should kinda know this stuff-"

"You weren't very much in tune with each other once you got out of hell though," Bobby informed him. "There were plenty of times that I know that you were arguing and as for this baby, he did a good job of hiding it. Probably found out late about this one as well."

Dean groaned.

"Are you telling me you knew Sam was pregnant?" When Bobby only averted his eyes, Dean's gaze softened. "It's not your fault Bobby, Sam's stubborn. I know and I bet even Cas would agree with me in saying that you aren't to blame for this. If anything you were there. You recognized what we didn't and who could blame you. Cas and I were still distanced from Sam since the whole apocalypse thing happened, one that can't be blamed on any one person even when we are mad."

"Yeah, but I don't get you guys at all." When Dean arched his eyebrows at him he continued on. "Ya idjits, I hear all this lovey dovey crap when one of you are in the hospital and yet you could never muster up the courage to just tell your brother all this on a good day. Is there a rule saying that one of you has to be critically hurt in order to open up? Don't answer that and just drive, ya idjit!"

Dean carefully made sure not to roll his eyes at him for the sake of not getting slapped upside the head. This was going to be a long day as it was and he for once didn't want to complicate anything else.

"Time to visit my pregnant baby brother."

Just that sentence seemed weird to him though.

A/N: Please leave reviews and let me know how I'm doing!

I'd really appreciate it, thanks. =]