The Boy who Loved Tweek Tweak
XII. Insipid Sky Parting Clouds

I stand outside the Tweak household and look up at the window that is Tweeks bedroom. There's a faint light coming from inside so I know he's up. Good. I start to pick up a few pebbles that are at the base of the house. Luckily I still have a baseball players arm. Aiming carefully, knowing that Tweeks parents bedroom is right near his, I toss a few of the stones at Tweeks window. I pause after a few tosses before beginning again. I stop when I see some movement from the light inside his room. Eventually I see a shift in the curtains and I at once see Tweeks face which he immediately pulls back from the curtains when I know he sees me. Smirking, I walk back to the front door and stand outside of it, waiting for him to open it.

I can hear his footsteps coming down the stairs, when he approaches the door I feel nervousness set in. I start to study my shoes as the faint sound of the door opening occurs. Before I can even look up, before I can say anything he speaks first.

"It's late. Go away please," he starts to close the door and in a sudden movement I step partway into the doorway, he doesn't notice and bangs my foot. A loose set of swears erupts from my mouth and he re-opens the door, panicking. I clamp my mouth shut even with the sting, I don't want to risk waking up his parents.

"Oh Jesus, I'm sorry! Are you okay Kenny, why would you put your foot in the doorway like that?"

I grit my teeth together and try to swallow the immense pain of my foot. It's throbbing but I try to pay it no mind. "I'm fine, but I didn't come here at three in the morning to get a door slammed in my face." I tell him.

He doesn't say anything for a moment as he looks at me impassively, his earlier concern for me already having vanished. Averting his eyes, he rubs the side of his arm with the other. "Why are you here? I don't really understand." He says, though I barely hear him. "If you… if you didn't like me, at all why did you pretend to?" He shakes his head to himself, "Cartman doesn't like me either but he's pretty clear about it. He wouldn't let it drag on. It hurts my feelings when he does stuff to me, but…" He pauses for a moment. "But what you did… hurts ten times more." His statement is below a whisper and his head is hanging down as he shifts from one foot to the other, one of his arms behind the door as he leans against the frame, letting his blonde hair fall into his face.

I can't see his face, but I don't have to, to know a few tears are falling from his eyes. I felt bad for what he overhead before, but to stand here and watch him cry over something I did…

"Tweek, let's go to the swings." I say.

I rightfully expect him to refuse, to slam the door in my face, and he should, I deserve that at the very least. Instead he says nothing, shuts his front door, passes me, and starts walking toward the direction of the woods.

I'm unsure of what to do, so I follow behind saying nothing. I don't want to stay and talk right in front of his door, and the swings have always made me feel better, they've always given me hope. It's been my retreat for so long because of so many things, that I can't believe that I'm finally sharing it with someone else. Or that, that someone else is Tweek.

As we get farther from the main part of town, Tweek slows down and I take the lead. I don't imagine he knows exactly where the swing set in the little park is located. It's pretty hard to find I realize. When I had came across it I was running, zigzagging in the woods trying to flee from my own demons. It was a miracle that I was able to find it after that first time.

Once we reach the clearing, I momentarily forget I'm with Tweek as I claim my favorite of the two. I sit, and take a moment to test the bounce. The set doesn't look that old, but I still expect it to break one day. It's taken a lot of abuse from me over the years. Feeling that it's safe I start a slow glide through the air, hanging on lightly, barely pumping my legs. I don't feel like going high tonight. When I get to the highest point in the glide I raise my head up to the sky. It's a partly clouded evening; the moon is only able to give a small amount of light. I take in a few deep breathes as I swing back down, closing my eyes.

When I open them back up, I see Tweek and am instantly pushed out of my reverie.

You came here for a reason.

I know, and I had momentarily pushed that reason in the back of my mind. Tweek is standing on the edge of the second swing, not sitting on it. I slow my glide to a stop.

"You don't want to swing?" I ask.

"You don't want to swing?" Are you serious! You're supposed to be apologizing! Not making idle conversation!

It's the first thing that came out. I didn't really intend on saying that. Apparently neither did Tweek as his face looks confused, but he does sit on the swing, though not actually moving as his hands grip the chains.

"I don't know how to." He responds.

I look at him in awe, "you don't know how to? Everyone knows how to." I state, not really believing him.

"I wasn't allowed, because I shake so much."

Oh. That makes sense.

"But you're not shaking now; do you want me to teach you?"

Tweek turns his head to stare at me, giving me a look I can't read. "Okay," he finally says.

I try to teach Tweek how to swing. I tell him about pumping your legs, showing him how to do it, but he's a hopeless case. He can't seem to get the pumping down and he starts to realize that.

"It's aright," I tell him. "It'll take practice."

"When would I practice? I couldn't do it in public, that's way too embarrassing, I'd never hear the end of it."

"You can practice here," I say.

He doesn't say anything for a moment before nodding. I watch as he attempts to swing again. I've never seen anyone concentrate so hard on something that has always been so natural for me. After a few more pointless attempts he stops completely and sighs in frustration.

"I just want to be able to swing like you do," he says quietly.

I rise and abandon the swing I'm on, and much to his surprise as well as my own, I start to gently push him. I don't let him get too high, I can tell he isn't comfortable with that idea but I let him get the air he wants.

He's becoming more relaxed, he's letting the same feeling I always get when I swing overtake him.

But its time to stop avoiding the obvious.

Tweeks relaxed, but I'm still tense. When it looks like I might give him another push I instead grab a hold of his chains, stopping him, but getting jostled all the same. He shrieks a little, surprised at my action. As he starts to turn twist himself around to look at me I drop my head, still holding onto his chains.

"K-Kenney?" I hear him.

I glance up. He's still calm, still unlike himself, so unlike himself... And his eyes are studying my own. I'll never adjust to a Tweek like this.

"Tweek…I'm sorry." I finally say.

"You don't really have to apologize." He responds to me and I look at him blankly.

"I told Stan I couldn't stand a thing about you, you think I lied about wanting to be friends, you think I dragged you along for my own sick enjoyment and now you're saying I don't have to apologize?" I ask wondrously.

"If you really didn't like me, you wouldn't have been trying so hard to say you were sorry to me. Especially given the way I was acting around you for days. Besides, you're teaching me how to swing in a place that's always just been for you. People don't do that for people they hate right?"

"Then… we're okay?" I ask and Tweek nods.

"But I do have one question."

"Go ahead." I nod at him.

"Why did you have to say that anyway? What had Stan said before?" He cocks his head to the side in curiosity and I look off, as if I'm trying to remember. Of course I fucking remember. Stan had been asking if I had a thing for Tweek and I snapped, denying it all, as harshly as I could. But I can't tell him that. Yet, I don't want to lie about it.

"I'd rather not get into that." I say to him and pray he accepts that answer and wont pry for anything more. I let out an internal sigh of relief when he nods and looks ahead at the still open snowy area.

"We should get home," Tweek says. "It's starting to get lighter out."

When I glance at the sky I see that he's right. Tweek hops off his swing and we start to make our way back to town. The cold walk back is in as much silence as the one coming up here. Even though everything is supposed to be right between us again, I feel like something is off, but I don't know how to explain it to Tweek.

I walk him back to his house, and watch as he unlocks the door, making sure that he's able to get into his house. I say my goodnight, and that I'll see him tomorrow in school. Walking back down his walkway, I still get the feeling of something not being quite right. When I feel his hand rest on my shoulder I turn around and look sat him.

"Um," he starts his sentence. "I, well, I…" the stutter has definitely returned and I can't help but smile and wait and watch for him to spit out whatever's on his mind. He gasps in my face, but I don't get to learn why he gasped as he looks away and tries his luck with his sentence again.

"I know I shouldn't but I, ergh, Jesus, I can't believe that I'm," he stops in the middle of his sentence to sigh. "I shouldn't," he begins again. "But I do."

"You do what?" I ask, the smile on my face being replaced by my confusion.

"I still love you," he mumbles, but it's something I can't help but hear perfectly.

"Oh," is the only word I can manage. As I try to think of something more than just one word to say I feel the abrupt pressure and slight wetness of a kiss on my cheek just as I see Tweek sprint into his house, almost slamming the door shut.

I don't know how long I stay staring at his front door, but at some point I reach my hand to touch my cheek. The one he kissed. I realize what seems so off about this whole situation. Even though Tweek is stuttering again, his twitching has yet to return.

Dear Journal,

You can see that I didn't just go downstairs to tell Kenny to go away. I was going to, I really was, I was just going to close the door on him but I ended up hurting him on accident. Somehow that led to us walking, in the middle of the night no less! And I wasn't in the least bit frightened. Mostly because I was too sad at the time to care. Kenny lead us to his park, the one where I saw him swing that one time in the middle of the night. He tried to teach me how to swing and for awhile I completely forgot why I wasn't even talking to him. I still can't swing, but he says it takes practice. Anyway… Kenny apologized Journal. He actually apologized, but I wouldn't accept it.

After everything he did tonight, I know he doesn't really hate me, though I still want to know why he said those things in the first place, but I didn't want to pry. I could tell he didn't want me to either. After we were done talking we walked back together and you won't believe what I did! I still can't believe I did it, I don't know what came over me.

Jesus! It was so embarrassing that I wasn't able to face him afterward, but I'm still smiling about it even now! I KISSED Kenny! He didn't kiss me, I kissed him. Not on the lips of course, no way, just on the cheek but I did it and that's the point! I wonder how he feels about it… I know we always say that we're friends but I wanted to stop being his friend a long time ago.

I even told him I loved him again too! I really don't know what came over me tonight, or this morning I guess is more correct. It must have been all that time moping and not being around him when I still wanted to be even though he hurt me. Tomorrow I have to face him, oh Jesus why did I kiss him?

…maybe it's because he smiled at me again, but this time it was the best one yet. It was soft and real, and it was for me.

Your friend, Tweek

End of chapter 12welve

AN: This chapter was going to be longer but I got tired of having you all wait for one. Thanks for all the reviews from the last chapter! It made me oh so happy! I realize Tweek forgives Kenny rather quickly, maybe too quickly? But I didn't see Tweek holding a grudge as long as Kenny was sincere with his apology, and he is. Please read and review!

Faery Goddyss :D